#clumsybat speaks

[clumsybat]

I started taking qelbree, a nonstimulant adhd medication, and started having severe bouts of rage multiple times a day. It took almost two weeks before I realized what was happening, and any time a medication has caused negative effects I’ve had the same reaction: I immediately attribute it to some sort of witch’s curse or a creeping illness brought on by seasonal allergies.

“Medication side effects sound real bad, but that would never happen to me”, says guy careening towards a wall labeled “medication side effects”.

[clumsybat]

Ah, that time of the month where I run frantically around my kitchen and forget every normal thing I’ve ever eaten right before a tattoo appointment.

[clumsybat]

my job makes me record every time I have to tell an employee to stop doing something stupid or dangerous. sometimes I feel like my boss is going to see it and think it's a prank. wrote "told employee not to sit on equipment" today.

[clumsybat]

The inherent intimacy of eating a pomegranate

[clumsybat]

I see this vandalized sign every time I take the trash out at work and it’s ark pussy. What is ark pussy? Please, I can’t stop thinking about ark pussy.

[clumsybat]

Sometimes I hire a new person into the kitchen and immediately I can tell that they think the work is beneath them; especially if I’ve hired them to wash dishes. It’s confusing: they obviously applied and interviewed for the job, but also, they are in a building full of people also doing the job. The same or similar jobs. It’s insulting to everyone around you to turn up your nose at the work the rest of us are doing. I want to grab these people by the collar and tell them, “Nothing in a restaurant is more important than the disher. The world is built on the backs of the people who keep things clean”.