Why am I like this? Desperate for love... Crying over a guy I have only seen two times. Crying way too much for these few reasons. Are there real reasons anyway? He was always decent, kind, didn‘t touch me the way I wouldn‘t like it. He texts me first, he texts me back and still I start to panic if I see he‘s online...and offline without texting me back. But how many times does that happen? Not that many, I guess.. But what am I supposed to do? Make clear that I‘m interested in you? Withdraw, so you get interested in me? I don‘t know... What‘s my fucking problem?!
I don‘t know what you want..from me. At all. Do you like me because I‘m kinda fun and you like to bang me? Or do you REALLY like me (and want to bang me anyway of course)? Am I lucky this time? All I want is this to work out, to turn out right. Just this time.. Are you gentle and nice because that’s just the way you are? Or do you want me to like you? Because holy shit, I do. I want you to hold my hand in that kinda awkward way for just a fleeting moment again. I want to listen to your music all day long, your jokes, everything. I want to get drunk with you and wake up next to you the next day and don‘t have to get up. And most of all, I want to hear that you want me to be near you. Cause boy, it‘s only February but you already feel like the first day of spring. And I will always choose love.