Connor leaned back against the side of the building, his head tilting towards the sky. The thump of the club music still reverberated out to the street, but it was nothing like when they'd first arrived. The crowds had begun to trickle out around two-thirty in the morning. Now that it was ten to four, the majority were dissipating into the night, calling rides or heading back to the parking garage for their cars.
He couldn't deny, it had been a wonderful night.
Markus leaned into place beside him. Their shoulders brushed together. “Did you have fun?” he asked.
“Very much.” Connor reached for Markus' hand and planted a kiss just below his knuckles. “Thank you again.”
“My pleasure.”
Their fingers stayed tangled as they glanced down the street, looking for the license plate of the car that was picking them up. Conor flicked through the notifications in his head that he'd put on hold in the club. Nothing of much interest... except a text from Hank, followed by a video.
I don't think they like each other very much, he read. He clicked open the video with a grimace, expecting the worst.
“Sumo and the cat have been at it since you left tonight,” Hank's voice told him off-camera, the focus trailing across the floor as he walked from the living room into the kitchen. “She keeps viciously attacking him. It's been crazy—” The camera panned up, revealing Sumo sprawled out in his favorite spot on the kitchen floor. Nestled into his fur was the outline of Beatrice, laying on her belly, front paws spread forward like a sphinx and nose buried into him as she kneaded away with lazy claws. Hank chuckled. “I don't know if it's picking up on video, but I can hear her purr from here. Huh, Sumo?” The old dog looked up with lidded eyes. His head stayed in place as he let out a hefty sigh. “She's got you worked, doesn't she? I've never even seen a cat lay that way when they do that.”
The camera shook as the video came to an abrupt end. Markus glanced over when he heard Connor chuckle. “What's up?”
“See for yourself,” he said, and sent the video through their connected hands.
Markus watched the beginning with a serious look on his face, before it melted into a grin. “Oh, no.” He gave a low laugh. “They're adorable. When do I get to meet her, anyway?”
“Oh, that's right. I haven't introduced you yet.” Connor pressed his lips together, pondering it for a moment. “Why don't you drop in for a few minutes when we get back?” he suggested.
“We won't wake up Hank?”
“He's a sound sleeper,” Connor assured him. He closed his eyes and stroked his thumb over the side of Markus' hand. “I could do with a recharge myself.”
“Yeah, me too—”
“Markus!”
Their heads snapped to the right. An android Connor had never seen before—black, cropped hair and a blinding white smile—approached them from down the sidewalk, trailed by two others. Markus' face lit up in recognition. “Jeremy,” he greeted, taking a step forward. He placed a hand on the side of the android's arm when he was close enough.
Jeremy laughed in disbelief. “I can't believe you remember my name.”
“I remember everyone,” Markus told him. “Connor, this is Jeremy. He came to Jericho not long after I joined.”
Jeremy's gaze fell on Connor, a hint less warm than it had been with Markus. “I don't think we ever met,” he apologized. “Nice to meet you. This is Angela and Chris.” He motioned to the two behind him. Connor nodded. The one named Angela only raised an eyebrow; Chris offered a quiet Nice to meet you.
“Did you three come out for the event tonight?” Markus asked.
“We did. I saw a good amount of us from the original group here. Not that...” Jeremy grimaced. “Not that it's much.” He shook his head. “Sorry. I'm sure you're trying to get out of here. I just wanted to come over and say thanks. We wouldn't be here, able to celebrate tonight if it weren't for you, Markus.”
Markus' hand tightened on Jeremy's arm. “All of us played a part in making what we celebrated tonight a reality, not just me.You all should be just as proud.”
The look on Jeremy's face was warm, if not a little sad, when Markus embraced him. “Until our paths cross again, brother,” Connor heard the android murmur, and then they withdrew from each other. The group of three turned back the way they had come, slipping back into the night. Connor's eyes followed their drifting figures through the crowd until they turned the corner, out of sight.
Markus' hand was on his arm. “Our pick-up's here.”
Silence filled the car on the ride back to Hank's house. Connor let his gaze linger out the window with unfocused eyes, but his mind was back on the sidewalk, outside the club. The look Jeremy had given him when he said they'd never met was pressed into it; he could have sworn there was a chill behind the politeness. Something in it had triggered a warning in his head he couldn't quite pinpoint.
“Connor?”
He blinked a few times. Markus' fingers were on his arm, he realized. “Sorry, what?”
“I said we're here.”
His brow furrowed as he glanced outside. Sure enough, there was the front of Hank's house. “We just left the club, though,” he murmured.
A hint of concern crossed Markus' face. “That was twenty minutes ago.”
“Oh.” Connor clenched and unclenched his jaw. “Guess not, then. You still want to come in and meet Beatrice?”
“Are you okay, Connor?”
“I'm fine.” He tried to give a reassuring look that Markus didn't seem convinced by. “Really,” he insisted. “Come on, I want you to meet her.”
They made their way inside as quietly as they could manage—which, considering the large bolt on the front door, was a debatable description of quiet. The street lamp outside cast a mellow light over the living room through the window that forced the shadows to recede further into the corners. Connor locked the door behind them and led Markus into the kitchen by the hand.
Sumo was still in the spot he'd occupied during Hank's video. He thumped his tail against the floor in greeting when they came into view. Beatrice had moved to the space against his neck, nestled between his front paws and chin. Her green eyes were alert, her one ear up.
“Hi,” Connor whispered to them as he walked over, kneeling down to stroke Sumo's head and offer his hand to Beatrice for inspection. “You can come over,” he told Markus over his shoulder.
Markus crouched down behind him and leaned over from the side. “Hello, Beatrice,” he said. He rubbed two fingers together and followed Connor's suit, offering her his hand. She sniffed it for a few seconds, curious—who is this new stranger in my house? And then she rubbed her cheek against his finger in approval, lip catching to reveal her teeth.
Markus smiled. “She's gorgeous,” he told Connor quietly. “How old is she?”
“We aren't really sure of her exact age, but... somewhere around five months...” The words trailed off. Markus' face was close. Very close. Connor felt his internal fans whir as he stole a glance down at his mouth.
Markus tilted his head, meeting Connor's gaze from the corner of his eye. They closed when Connor leaned towards him to close the space between their lips, buffered with a second's hesitation. Something between them sighed at the contact.
Connor pulled away a fraction of an inch when it was over. “Where are you going?” he heard Markus murmur.
A smile twitched at the corner of his mouth. “You still have a car waiting outside for you,” he reminded him.
“Do I?”
Connor raised his eyebrows. “Unless you'd like to stay here?” he offered.
I'd like to, because I'm still not entirely convinced you're okay, Markus wanted to say. He reached for Connor's hand and clasped it tightly between both of his. “Or you could come home with me.”
A pulse of electricity surged down Connor's arms. “I haven't left Beatrice alone for a full night yet,” he said. “I don't know if she's ready.”
Markus nodded. “Of course. I understand.”
“You could stay here, though. If you wanted to.”
“Hank wouldn't mind?”
“I have yet to see him up before nine. I don't think you would even cross paths.”
“Hm.” Markus tilted his head up as he considered the proposition, before giving a nod. “Fair enough.” He waited until Connor had stood and let him lead the way back into the living room. “Do you have your own room?” he whispered.
A strange look passed over Connor's face. “Hank offered me Cole's old room a while back.” His brow furrowed as he sat down on the couch. “I told him no.”
Markus sat down beside him, leaning against the back cushion. “How come?”
He hesitated. “I know he meant well, and I think he was trying to be kind. But I don't think he's ready to relinquish that piece he has left of Cole.” He met Markus' gaze now. “And I didn't want to be the one to take it from him.” Markus' eyes softened. He pressed a kiss against the base of Connor's palm. “It's not like I really need one, anyway. I have no need for a bed.”
“Where do you recharge?”
“Usually right here. There's an outlet behind the couch.” He leaned to the side, positioning the back of his neck on the arm rest, feet still planted on the floor. “It's late,” he commented.
“It is,” Markus agreed.
Connor watched his face—with eyes that were more than tired, to Markus' concern—before extending his arm. His lids fluttered shut when the other android leaned into the angled space between his body and the back of the couch, head nestling into the nook along his collar bone, between is shoulder and chin. Markus' fingers reached for his and clasped them tightly as they settled in.
The faintest sound of ringing crossed the room from the kitchen doorway. Connor opened an eye, but there was no need to peer over; Beatrice was already jumping up onto Markus' leg, assessing the situation. What's going on here? Without me?
“Hi there,” Markus said as she made the treacherous journey across him towards Connor. She stretched up to sniff his nose, whiskers spread. And then she settled for the unclaimed seat made up of Markus' shoulder and his chest.
“Okay,” he relented as she made herself at home, claws kneading his shirt. Her purr filled the air around them. “If you insist.”
Markus stifled a laugh. “Oh, no.”
“What?” Connor already knew the answer when his ears caught the sound of heavy paws making their way to the couch. “Sumo, I don't think there's room,” he pleaded when the old dog came into view. His tail swayed hopefully as he sniffed their group.
“There's room on the other half of the couch,” Markus offered. “Maybe.”
That was all the persuasion Sumo needed. He hoisted himself up with a grunt, eliciting another from Markus when he used his lap to determine the best possible position.
“You know Hank doesn't like you up here,” Connor tried to remind him. He received a heavy sigh in response.
Markus grinned as Sumo settled his thick head on the side of his thigh. He glanced up, though the radius he could turn was limited by Beatrice. “Well. Guess we were selfish not to invite you guys over with us, huh?” He ran his hand through the fur on Sumo's neck.
Connor smiled and settled his palm onto Markus' upper chest. “How are you holding up?” he asked.
“Tired,” Markus admitted.
“You want to go into sleep mode for a few hours and recharge?”
There was a pause. “What about you?”
“I'm okay for now. I can always recharge during the day.” It's not like I'll have anything going on. “I'm not ready to power down yet, anyway.”
Markus was quiet while he thought about it, then relented, if not a little hesitantly. “If you change your mind and need to switch, wake me up.”
“I will,” Connor promised.
It took a minute of maneuvering to reach the mini recharge port without disturbing the animals, its cord rolled up on the lamp table behind his head. He handed it to Markus and watched as it was secured it in place. “I'm going to set an internal restart for three hours from now.”
Connor nodded.
The room grew quiet, save for Beatrice's purring, though even that was growing softer as she began to doze off once more. Markus' body relaxed against him in the stillness. He let himself run a thumb over the other android's temple, where his LED would've been fading in and out of blue if he still had it. The leader of the revolution, powered down and vulnerable against his chest, a kitten against one shoulder, and a dog's head on one leg. It was quite the sight.
He wanted Markus to rest. He had done so much for him tonight, it only seemed right.
But he also wanted time alone to think.
Connor let his head tilt back as he flicked over the memory of Jeremy from earlier, his warm demeanor with Markus, and the way it had changed with him. Something he had said rattled through Connor's mind in a way he didn't know how to handle. “I saw a good amount of us from the original group here. Not that... Not that it's much—I just wanted to come over and say thanks. We wouldn't be here, able to celebrate tonight if it weren't for you, Markus.”
The way Jeremy had called Markus brother.
And then claimed to not know who Connor was, despite the story his eyes told, disguised behind a polite facade.
It had looked a little too much like disgust, he realized.
Connor closed his eyes, brow knitting together.
He pulled up a different memory. The tub of kittens in his arms, his gaze about to turn away to follow Michael back to the main street when he was stopped by Jeanine, and the look on her face. The sadness she couldn't quite conceal as she thanked him before shutting herself back in the apartment. He flicked back further.
Panic in the air around him as androids ran. Everyone desperate to escape the death trap Jericho had become without warning, soldiers infesting every other corner. The very soldiers he had led there. And then the explosion.
The run to safety so soon after his deviancy; trying to make it out in time with the rest; his first true taste of terror in the chaos around him. Raw, unbridled terror.
He'd learned later from Markus, after he'd returned from infiltrating Cyberlife, how many it was estimated had been destroyed. He'd never thought to ask what percentage came from within the walls of Jericho, before the final confrontation had ever even started.
Never thought to ask how many had had their lives stolen away, trapped in that grip of terror he'd managed to elude in the end.
“I saw a good amount of us from the original group here. Not that it's much.”
The look of disgust.
Connor's internal fans choked for air as they jammed. Somewhere distant in his brain, he almost saw the flashing stress level warnings. “It's my fault,” he whispered to no one.
Yes, your fault. It's your fault they never made it out. You led death to their doors. You stood with the humans that put a bullet through their heads. They never would have had to trigger the bomb if you weren't there.
You weren't deviant yet, he tried to plead with himself.
How many chances did you have to break through into deviancy before then that you threw away? When something in the back of your mind told you things were wrong? And now their blood is on your hands.
No amount of break-ins at Cyberlife can wash that away.
I tried—
Trying is not enough. You cannot rewrite this—
You are the least worthy to call yourself a member of Jericho—
How many of those androids that never made it out would have been there tonight? How many never got their chance?
His sensors alerted him to something rough and small that scraped the corner of his mouth.
Blood. Blood on your hands—
On my hands—
And now you accept forgiveness from everyone around you that you don't deserve. From Markus—
The scraping moved up towards his cheek, unrelenting.
When you deserve to rot in place of the dead.
Unrelenting. Demanding his attention.
Connor blinked his eyes open. His view of the ceiling was blurred and unfocused. Overheating and imminent shutdown warnings blared in his head. And the scraping was still there.
He looked down; Beatrice was no longer snuggled down where she'd made herself at home before. She had perched on his shoulder, stretching forward to busy herself with cleaning his face of the saline tears spilling down his cheeks. Her purr reverberated through his head near his ear. Almost... comforting. A shudder passed through his mechanics. He let his eyes shut as a fresh wave of tears flowed forth.
“It was my fault,” he choked out. “They're gone because of me.”
Her purr didn't falter, even when he reached a hand up and clutched her close, his tears mixing with her fur in the darkness.
A groan escaped Markus. His internal systems were slow to finish their power-up. They took their time as they whirred to life. He blinked until his eyes could focus on the room around him; sunlight streamed in from the window, casting a brightness over the pane that would have been enough to hurt human eyes. He tilted his head back to search the couch.
It was empty.
He sat up now, scanning. The not just the couch was vacant, but the entire room. “Connor?” he called out softly. When there was no reply he pushed himself up to stand and made his way over to the kitchen, peeking in through the doorway.
Connor was crouched on the floor, watching Beatrice as she worked her way through a plate of wet food. “Morning,” Markus said to him.
Connor glanced up. “Morning.” Markus' brows drew together. The look on the other android's face was the heaviest he had ever seen it. “How was your recharge?”
“It was... good.”
Connor stood and took to the chair pulled out from the kitchen table. Markus crossed the floor and sat down in the one beside him. “What have you been up to?” he asked slowly. Connor's eyes stayed locked on Beatrice. “Did you end up powering down for a while?”
“Not exactly.”
Markus leaned forward, trying to catch his gaze. “Connor, what's wrong? Talk to me.”
“You just restarted,” Connor told him, almost dismissively. “I don't want to dump anything on you.”
“I'm wide awake,” Markus promised. He saw Connor's jaw clench and unclench a few times. “I mean it. What's on your mind?”
It didn't take much for him to relent. Markus waited as he struggled for a starting point. “You remember the android from last night?”
“Jeremy?”
A nod, followed by silence. Markus waited again for him to continue, catching a glance of his hands. They were balled into fists against the table.
“Hey... hey.” His eyes widened in alarm when he saw tears filling Connor's. He reached over and placed a hand on his wrist. “Connor, what happened?”
The android shook his head, lifting his fists to press them against his temples. A shaky, guttural noise came from the back of his throat. “How many androids do you think didn't make it out of Jericho?”
Markus' mouth fell open, his brain scrambling to put the pieces together of what he was being asked. It was a full four seconds before realization washed over him. “Oh, Connor...”
Connor let his hand be tugged away. He barely had time to blink before his face was pressed into Markus' shoulder, and arms were tight around him. His fingers clawed for leverage on Markus' back, clutching to him like he was hanging on to life itself. The sound of his name on Markus' lips triggered a single tear that fell into his shirt sleeve.
“It was my fault,” Connor gritted. “If I had never showed up to Jericho, those androids would still be alive.”
If Markus had to take a guess at what he thought it might be like to feel your heart break, this was it, holding as tightly as he could while his chest absorbed the aftershocks of Connor's shaking.
“Listen to me.” He pulled away now, his eyes hard as he looked into Connor's, hands firm on his shoulders. “What happened was terrible. The names and faces of those we lost will be burned into my head just as much as yours, for the rest of my life. I was their leader. And I couldn't keep them safe.” He closed his eyes for a moment. “But they knew what the risk of joining Jericho was. They agreed to those terms the minute they walked away from their old lives. We may not be able to bring them back, but we can bring justice for them every day that we fight for the freedom of our people. Every day that you fight the system, look it staight in the eyes, and tell it no.” His grip tightened on Connor's shoulders. “You fight to build a world where the things that happened will never happen again. That was what Jericho stood for. What it stands for.”
Connor stared with his lips apart, lost for words. Markus reached up to rub away the wetness beneath his eyes with the pads of his thumbs. “Reconcile by bringing them justice, Connor,” he whispered, choking back his own tears. “Fight for them. Mourn for who we've lost, and remember them.”
Connor's mouth finally closed. “It just doesn't... feel like enough,” he rasped. “When so few know their names. They deserve more.”
Markus' eyes softened. “Then we do the only other thing we can.”
To be continued (@myself: no shit, this is a series)
