“i luv this book plz can u visit mine to give me tips its my first time writing a story” - gianttheclam
Okay, so this would be my first request for constructive criticism on any writing site that I’ve been on. So, of course! I will gladly help in any way possible!...
...If the story were still up.
See, I got this request four months ago. I totally gave them some good tips (at least, I think I did) to help them along the writer’s path/journey/whatever. I just hadn’t thought to post those tips here until... now. And now that story’s gone forever.
From what I remember, the story was a fanfiction mash-up between My Little Pony and Sonic characters. Great! Fun! I’m sure it would be immensely popular (with a few tweaks, of course)!
I don’t remember what proceeded during the story (four months ago is quite a long time!) but I remember it being set up sort of like a play script, where the characters names are shown on the left and it’s implied that those are the characters speaking. It was difficult to determine what was being said and what the characters were doing, but that’s easily fixed with some parentheses surrounding the actions. Also, going with formal playscript, the names when not being addressed (said) by the characters are completely (every letter!) capitalized, even between the parentheses. Example- EGGMAN: I can’t believe this! (EGGMAN scrambles to his Eggmobile and escapes.)
Besides that, there were a lot of grammar mistakes (punctuation, misspellings, etc), and you could say that this was written by a four year old, despite the length of the chapters. But you know what? While reading, I could tell that this person tried really hard to write something that he/she thought was a great idea for a story, and I always appreciate seeing that kind of effort. Despite looking like a waste of time to most readers, this person put effort into this and wanted to make it into something good.
It would’ve been nice to see your story more polished, and I also wish you would’ve talked to me again if you needed anything else for it. It was your choice to dump the idea, and maybe you read my tips which helped you decide that it wasn’t worth it. Whatever it was, I wish you all the best gianttheclam, and I hope you continue to write and become a good writer no matter who gives you crap for it.
...And that’s all for the first criticism, even though it was short and I couldn’t give examples from the story to use. If anyone else would like a criticism or a few tips, I will gladly give them! Just message me on here, Wattpad, or Quotev! (Same username for all!)
Side note: I also would like someone to give me some constructive criticism on my Legend of Zelda fanfiction as well! (It’s my first blog post - also a link to Wattpad, even though I put it on Quotev, too)
