So...we all remember “Max Out”, right?
One of the most heartbreaking episodes due to the fact that it left Max’s fate “unknown” to the audience, as well as our main heroes at the time. Ben particularly was shown to be very affected by the events which unfolded during the end of that episode because he was under the impression that he had just lost one of the most important people in his life.
If the point of being a hero is to save lives, imagine how he must have felt to watch what he thought was the death of a close relative and not be able to do anything about it.
A similar thing happened in “Secret of the Omnitrix.” Only, in those circumstances, it was Gwen who was the one who was thought to be lost. And that immediately crushed him.
So, at this point in the series, Ben has already gone through both of those experiences. He’s been exposed to how fragile human life is when you’re constantly surrounded by danger. And it’s probably shown him that no matter how many aliens he has available to him, no matter how powerful they may be, sometimes even that isn’t enough to prevent fatal outcomes.
It’s no wonder he takes it so hard when a mission “fails” because he probably feels that, because he is the one wearing what is arguably the most powerful device in the universe, it is his responsibility to prevent those fatal outcomes.
Not to mention, when people choose to go into work which deals with circumstances such as these, they always get training to prepare them for situations when worst comes to worst. They are taught about conflict and stress management so that they would be ready for when disaster strikes, or at least be aware that it is always a possibility.
Ben started doing this type of work when he was only ten years old. Even at the age of fifteen, although he might have been armed, he was unprepared for the emotional trauma coming his way. And losing Max, the only experienced adult he had nearby, is even more devastating because now...who else is there to go to?
Aliens are still a secret to the rest of the world, and his parents didn’t know about the watch just yet. The rest of his team stick together and look out for each other, but, realistically, they are no more prepared than he is. They aren't therapists. All three of them are teenagers.
During this time, Ben gets together with Julie, who is quickly let in on Ben’s secret. This should mean that he now has a significant other who should support him while he is still dealing with all of the above. And, at first, she was written doing just that such as in the episode “Save the Last Dance.”
However, if you didn’t know...their first argument happens before “Voided”, where Max is revealed to still be alive. And if you realize what it was they were arguing about in “Pet Project”, it might strike you as a little insensitive and slightly ignorant on Julie’s part.
I bring this up because many people blame Omniverse for the downfall of Benlie, when their disconnect had unfortunately begun before Ultimate Alien was even a thing. It’s too bad because this could have been reversed with some mutual understanding. If you’d like to argue in Julie’s defence, then you could say that it is unknown whether Ben had ever told her about what he had gone through before they started dating.
But, then again, since these topics are still very fresh wounds, do you think he would want to?
I mean, he did have a hard time opening up to Rook about the Feedback situation (which is understandable).
I have done a whole analysis on “Pet Project” before, but, for context, the main reason they are arguing is because Julie (who is unarmed) wants to go with Ben and his team to save Ship from the Forever Knights, while Ben does not want her to come for her own safety.
Ben: “And we’re not talking because?”
Julie: “Because I am upset with you for being upset with me about Ship.”
Ben: “Julie, we aren’t talking about a Poodle from the local pound. You don’t know what you’re dealing with.”
Julie: “Yes I do! I’m dealing with a person who is incredibly mean to poor little Ship, and who obviously does not trust me!”
Ben: “This isn’t about trust!”
What gets me the most is Ben’s silence - something that was probably quite overlooked by a large portion of the audience, and seemingly the other characters as well. When he has no words to say what he is really feeling, due to how much is truly affects him, it says way more than any words could.
Ben: “But why would the Forever Knights want to steal Ship?”
Kevin: “Please. It can turn into anything it touches. It’s like a cup of instant weapon.”
After this exchange of dialogue, the screen cuts to this shot of his expression before moving forward with the story.
This is where I’d like to remind you that this episode takes place before “Voided” - where Max is revealed to be alive.
They wanted to stress the implication that Ben was struggling to come to terms with the idea of Max being gone so much that they even added this scene in to the first Ben 10: Alien Force video game, where he is shown beginning to talk about Max and then trailing off and going silent:
Do you really think there is no connection between how Ben feels about almost losing his cousin, still being under the impression that he had lost Max in the name of saving the world, and now having to deal with his naive girlfriend who doesn’t seem to understand when she is putting her own life in danger?
A portion of the fandom had actually accused Ben of being unreliable and sexist in this episode, claiming that his team had to practically “twist his arm” in order to help his girlfriend. In reality, it was Ben’s reasoning and traumatic life experience that was undermined in order to make him seem like a bad boyfriend. It seemed more like he would do anything to prevent harm from coming to those who can not defend themselves properly, even if it jeopardizes how “desirable” he is as a boyfriend to some people.
Being a good boyfriend means being reasonable, not agreeing to everything just for the sake of being compliant and obedient.