No matter how angry I was at you, I never yelled, I never hurt you, and I didn’t do those things that might hurt you, because I love you. So much that it hurts. I hate seeing such a beautiful, fun, creative, talented, girl like you go through something like this. And I wouldn’t accept the fact that you’d gone to BHH twice. I hated that you kept wanting to go back because the time you stayed there, you got fragile, scared, terrified of everything. I hate that you have to rely on pills, And I don’t want you to feel scared and like you can’t trust anyone. I just wanted to hold you and hug the monsters out of you. I want you to get better and to stop hurting yourself because hurting yourself is not worth the pain. I know it’s hard, but you have the strength inside of you to stop. Do it for everyone who loves you, do it for the ones you love, but do it for yourself.
I miss you. And I’m sorry that I left for 3 months. I needed to sort myself out, but there was never and still is never a day that you don’t cross my mind. I think about you every day. I love you like a sister. I love you so much that it was eating me alive.
You’ll win this battle, don’t give up.