Ok but how about the ‘married to the enemy’ au where there’s an emergency that calls for them to drop by Andrews place (who had a day off?) and Neil opens the door in his underwear and a shirt that is clearly Andrews and he’s like ‘hi?’ and acts all domestic and invites them in and shit
BRUH YOU CANT REKINDLE OLD FICS LIKE THIS
*
“This seems ill-advised,” Matt said.
Kevin simply huffed. Andrew wasn’t feral. Besides, it was an emergency. The man had shut his phone off, as was totally permitted on explicitly prefaced days off (but was still baffling to Kevin, who picked up every call and always had his phone fully charged).
“Renee wouldn’t agree with us intruding,” Dan agreed, hanging back a little. She was the one who’d suggested they bully their way into Andrew’s place in the first place. Kevin couldn’t believe she was the one backing out the easiest.
“That’s why we didn’t tell her. You’re both stalling,” he told the couple, and rapped his fingers loudly on the door.
It took thirty seconds for someone to answer: when the door swung open, Kevin regretted everything.
Neil Hatford wasn’t much to look at, much like his husband. His hair was very clearly mussed from sleep - or something else - and he had quickly pulled on an old grey zip-up. That did nothing to hide the red-plaid boxer-briefs, or the t-shirt that was a little short on him and said:
twins can’t mind read, so don’t even ask.
“Oh,” Andrew’s husband, the Butcher of Baltimore’s son, said. “Er, hello?”
“Hi,” Matt said, bolstering on like the man wasn’t in his pyjamas, or that he was clearly trying to keep back two cats from the doorway. “Andrew took an important case-file home that we need. Is he here?”
“He’s just in the shower,” Neil said, stepping aside to let the three of them in. He and Kevin shared a glower as Kevin walked past. Kevin was still unable to get past the whole mobster thing, and Neil wasn’t exactly pleased about it. “Ignore the mess: we’re getting ready to move.”
It wasn’t too messy: a few boxes were here and there on the table, some sealed, others filled with random things. None of them had labels, but rather, numbers. How they were supposed to remember what was what was beyond Kevin.
Neil flicked a cat toy off the couch and directed them to sit down. “Tea?”
“Sure,” Matt said, enthusiastic as the cats crowded his ankles. Neil smiled at him. “How have you been, Neil?”
“Alright,” the man said, flicking on the kettle. Kevin inched his foot away as one of the felines tried to play with his shoe-laces. He was much more of a dog person. “I plan on dying in this house. I never want to move again.”
“It’s a nightmare,” Dan agreed, settling into the well-worn cushions as she took in every facet of her surroundings. Her gaze lingered on the family photos, stacked on a shelf above the television. Her smile went all soft.
Kevin scoffed.
Four mugs of tea and a gentle scolding of the cats for trying to rip Dan’s trousers later, and Neil was sitting on the edge of the coffee table, talking amicably with both Dan and Matt. He’s zipped up the hoodie to hide the fact that the shirt was definitely not his, and also to obscure the red smudgings of emerging lovebites from view. His socks had cat-ears sewn into the hem. It was all ridiculously soft. Kevin’s scowl depended.
The bedroom door opened and yielded Andrew, toweling his hair dry in sweats and a long-sleeve, pushed up to the elbows. At the presence of others, he immediately dropped his arms and tugged down his sleeves.
“Well, isn’t this just nice,” he said, voice dangerously low.
“All we need is the Lakes file,” Kevin said. “Then we’ll get out of your hair.”
Andrew glanced at Neil, who smiled serenely up at him. He turned his impassive gaze back to the trio on the couch and said “You’d better.” before turning on his heel and marching to another room that was presumably his office. Dan and Matt leapt up to follow him: Kevin did too but hesitated at the last moment, holding the warm cup of tea between taut fists.
Neil looked up at him, arching an unimpressed brow. “Yes, Day?”
“Sometimes I can’t decide if you or Andrew are the bigger idiot for thinking this would work out fine.”
Neil hummed. “Sometimes I worry that it won’t. But it’s been fine thus far, hasn’t it?”
“If you hurt him, I won’t hesitate to have you thrown in prison and the key chucked down the drain,” Kevin warned.
Neil snorted. “A shovel-talk. Andrew’s own twin wasn’t gutsy enough to try it. You’re an interesting one, Kevin Day. You know that my old boss still remembers you?”
Kevin froze.
“He said you were always the diligent one. I think he quite likes your style,” Neil said.
“I’m a cop. How on earth could he ‘like my style’?”
Neil shrugged. “The lord works in interesting ways. He let both of us go: his biggest investments. In that way we’re pretty similar, aren’t we?”
“I’m nothing like you,” Kevin retorted.
Neil shrugged again. “You keep telling yourself that, Day.” He glanced to where the other three came out of Andrew’s study, Dan holding the file within her tight grasp.
“It was nice to see you,” Dan said, letting Matt link their arms. “You should hold a housewarming for the new place.”
“We promise not to bother you like this again,” Matt insisted.
Andrew just grunted, eyes only for Neil and Kevin.
“Bye,” Kevin said staunchly. Andrew huffed and vanished into the bedroom again.
Neil lead them out, socked feet whisper-quiet on the wooden floorboards. He picked up both the cats to keep them running this time, and nodded the three of them goodbye with only a little bit of mischievous warmth in his eye.
“He’ll win you over someday,” Matt grinned, jostling Kevin’s shoulder. “You can’t hold onto it forever.”
Kevin merely scowled.
*
lol kevin u weirdo, chillax bro