what's so crazy to me about my doctor who experience growing up is like. i have still not seen every single episode bc until jodies era i was too young to watch it all and frequently would try and watch but would get scared because I was about 10 and younger. and my experience watching chibnalls era happened mostly before covid when I was still like 13???? my first ever fanfiction was posted age 13 based on s12 and it remains to this day my most kudos'd fix despite being pretty shit compared to my writing now (obviously. I was literally 13). and so a lot of the poorer quality writing went over my head, as did yk all the messaging of episodes like kerblam, though even at the time i remember being frustrated with a lot of episode plot lines (i saw the whole spyfall 'now they'll see the real you' was bad at the time and other chib era moments like that have gotten worse as ive gained understanding experience etc).
it also came at a time that I was figuring myself out re. gender sexuality etc and both the doctors relationship with her gender and the thasmin subtext that became text later on were things i really connected with! and all this was on top of a) not really having friends as a young teenager b) covid hitting right as s12 finished airing and c) mental health stuff. it was a massive comfort to me and i didn't like reading too much criticism about it or focusing on the poorer qualities of it, because lots of people were picking the show apart and i didn't want to lose the comfort of what was one of my favourite shows at the time
all this to say thirteens run kind of cemented itself in my mind in a really unique and weird way because it was exactly what younger me needed. and when it ended I was busy with schoolwork and trying to just. cope and get on with things. and i got into other stuff which is why this blog went p quiet after thirteens run ended. and it definitely means i view that period - not just the show itself, the community i found on tumblr/ao3 as well - with maybe undue fondness. but as I've gotten older even without really rewatching it, I've been aknowledging more the episodes and story elements that are flawed or that just blatantly Suck for various reasons. and yeah maybe the version of thirteens era that lives in my brain is better than what actually existed. one of these days i will rewatch and lament what could have been if the characters and ideas behind the writing had been done justice. but thirteen will always be my doctor, even though the writing leaves a lot to be desired, because that was the era of doctor who that meant the most to me for so many years.
