New Year, New Chances: The Supergenius Rehabilitation Program
by Cordelia Ackerman (via The El Asilo Times)
Only one week into the new year, and the Vantage Corporation has already unveiled its first exciting new initiative of 2018.
In a press conference this morning, Mayor (and Vantage Chairman) Preston Winters announced the Supergenius Rehabilitation Program, a new initiative designed to benefit any currently incarcerated citizens in Vantage Penitentiary whose powers could classify them as a "supergenius". The mayor went on to explain that this classification includes - but is not limited to - Penitentiary prisoners with hyper-competence in any field, prisoners with advanced deductive reasoning powers, prisoners with data manipulation or tactical analysis powers, and prisoners with intuitive aptitude or intuitive replication powers. The classification "supergenius" may also be applied to prisoners with no powers whatsoever, provided they undergo testing to gauge their IQ and deductive reasoning skills, among other things the mayor did not specify.
"We know that these citizens have more to offer El Asilo than outlandish criminal exploits - and, quite frankly, their intelligence is being wasted behind bars," Mayor Winters said, in his statement to the press. "The Supergenius Rehabilitation Program will enable them to put their brain power to use in a constructive way, one that doesn't involve breaking free of their cells and constructing new gadgets to wreak havoc on the city. Instead, these supergeniuses will be aiding Vantage Corp in programming, weapons development, and - most importantly - finding gaps in our security and cybersecurity that we feel are worth patching up. We at Vantage feel that it's important to think like a villain or terrorist in order to catch a villain or terrorist, and we couldn't think of anyone better to help us strengthen the safety of El Asilo."
"I think it's just great, what they're doing," said Katy Crowe, sister of Kit Crowe, alias Blackbird, a hacker who was arrested for dumping blueprints of Vantage's experimental weapons online back in 2015. "I've been so worried about Kit, in jail with all those supervillains who could just snap them in half. I guess some of the other geniuses or whatever aren't great people, but at least Vantage is letting them have a second chance, you know? They're all just hackers and scientists, it isn't like they're going to go and level a city block or whatever."
In a statement following Mayor Winters's (and rare public appearance), Vantage Vice President Minh Nguyen confirmed that the participants in the Supergenius Rehabilitation Program will be granted access to Vantage housing, as well as Vantage's headquarters, including their laboratories. When this reporter expressed gentle doubt at the notion of Vantage Corp allowing former supervillains into their headquarters, Vice President Nguyen assured the crowd that the program participants will all be fitted with tracker anklets, and essentially placed under twenty-four hour surveillance. Hopefully this due diligence by Vantage Corp is enough to assuage any misgivings anyone may have about their program. One can only hope, as well, that the Supergenius Rehabilitation Program finds success, and not a coalition of inhumanly smart supervillains standing in the smoking rubble of what was once Vantage Corp.
(CORDELIA ACKERMAN has been reporting for the Times for two years, is originally from Maine, and wishes it snowed more in El Asilo.)