@createherself asked : “ he’s dead. he can’t talk. ”
𝐇𝐄'𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐇𝐎𝐏𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐀𝐘𝐁𝐄 𝐀 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐎𝐎 𝐌𝐔𝐂𝐇 . he’d put all of his energy into this ; into trying to help . that wasn’t abnormal . that was just who he was . but there was something about losing over and over and over again that got old . that no matter his best intentions he kept failing . 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐅𝐀𝐔𝐋𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃 . he knew that . of course he knew that . but it was his fault that they hadn’t survived . he’d made promises to them and to himself . and this is what it had come to . he didn’t like being the last man standing . there was a time he found himself on a whole world that sported such a concept and he’d hated every second of it . 𝐒𝐎 𝐇𝐄'𝐃 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐎 𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐘 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐏 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐌𝐀𝐍 . he didn’t even know him except by the letters printed on his name - badge . a professor carling , if that meant anything now .
his heart had stopped despite the doctor’s best efforts , despite every ounce of trying . the doctor had never been one for pleading because he knew how ridiculous it was . 𝐁𝐄𝐆𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄 . and yet he’s there , crouched over a lifeless body , with his hand upon a cold shoulder , asking it to get back up . 𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐏𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐔𝐋 . but in fairness , he also thought the two of them were alone . her voice startles him but not enough that he bothers to move . not enough that he will even look up at her . his gaze remains on the man’s still and restful face .
and then anger brims within him . 𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐒 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊𝐒 . she’s always ready to save him , from himself or from someone else . she comes laced in miracles but bringing the dead back to life is always a step too far . that’s just principle in most philosophies . 𝐁𝐔𝐓 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 . she knows when things will happen and when things that should happen have not happened and when things that can’t happen must . so the one thing she never is is late . 𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄 . whatever reason she has in being here it has nothing to do with anyone else on this ship because he is the only person left alive .
and even though she speaks to him softly he cannot help but find himself irritated by it . 𝐒𝐇𝐄'𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐋𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐀𝐍𝐘 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 . she’s not . and yet he turns his suffering upon her anyway , because she is there and he has no other buffer . the act of breaking inanimate objects has long since passed it’s use by date and hardly brings him any comfort . he gives the dead man’s shoulder a gentle squeeze before he retracts his hand and sits himself down on the floor on a ship that’s coming dangerously close to tearing itself apart in the gravity of the nearest gas giant .
❝ what do you want ? ❞ he asks sharply . he still refuses to look at her , but even if he did she wouldn’t like the look in his eyes anyway . ❝ you missed the party , if that’s what you’re after . ❞
