#crimsonsouls

[shamelessfm]

charlie and blaise will be here!

[catelyn-h]

Cate’s Diary

He’s home.  Oh Dear Lord thank you.  William is home.  He’s as safe, as can be expected.  Poor Penny, she brokered a deal with that bastard Italian so Katie would be released, since it seems none of my recent allies care about the poor souls in the Shadowlands..  I merely pray that they never understand what the poor folks go through, much less BE one...

We’ve talked.  He knows my lapses, and I his.  Ironically the more we search for our redemptions, the deeper in mud and filth we must wallow.  Bit he has forgiven my mistakes, even the ones I feared would drive him away.  He said he had companionship while he was gone, but how can I possibly begrudge him that?   His memories of me were lost, and while mine were intact, it was hardly as if I were alone myself.  

He still wishes to marry when we are free.  I told him we can have the large religious wedding he wants, but as soon as we are both able to walk in the sun, and are both breathing, we are going to city hall, and having a civil ceremony.  I don’t want to wait for all the hoops we will have to jump through.  It’s all mere formalization in any case...

He told me, I will have to give him to Hephzibah.  That, like Allistair, I will have to give him up, like a pawn in Chess.  I....  I can’t.  I will not play into Stick and Hephzibah’s hands like this....  It’s not right!  We’ve both fought so hard, why do I have do do this AGAIN?  

.......

Arguing with him is impossible.  He says he must be vulnerable to achieve the New Dawn.  Dear God help us.  Please.  

At least I will have my Wedding Night.

[catelyn-h]

Cate’s Diary

My God.  Those poor, poor people.  I could just weep for them all.  How the hell did William stand that place for so long?  And he NEVER said anything about Atlanta!  A bummer in Hotlanta?  Sweet Jesus.  

And why is it that when someone asks if they can tell you something, it’s never good?  If William had wanted me to know certain things he’d have told me himself.  I mean I get being lonely, and finding someone to be comforted with in some unusual places.  (I’d be a hell of a hypocrite all things considered...)  But does that mean that now that he does not remember anything...  

No he loves me.

Debriefed with Mr. Joseph.  For some reason, though he is older than the Duchess, I am less frightened of him, than I am of her.  I mean I would NOT want to be on his bad side for sure, but he’s willing to treat me courteously.  Perhaps I am foolish, but I fear him far less than her, but perhaps that is because he’s not a raging narcissist....  I also spoke with Allistair.  I needed to see him in person, see if I was wrong to trust him, but it seems the thoughts Mr. Henry put in my head with his raging about deals with the gentry were paranoia...  

It’s odd.  As we get to the end of this mess, I find Mr. Wundt more and more trustworthy.  Whatever he did in my head kept the Shadow from getting too bad.. (though hearing my self destructive impluses arguing with him is a proposition I never wish to repeast..)   Again, maybe I am a fool, but he has had our backs since the start.  He covered us with Dacosta’s murder, he got Marcus’ issues covered, hell he helped us in the pit with the Sabbat.. We’ll never be friends, but I think..  think.. we have a detente.  Of course he still threatens and blackmails for stuff he could have by asking, but I suppose that is how he’s used to doing things.  We discussed what to do on the flight back, and we had thoughts along the same lines.  There but for the grace of God...

[catelyn-h]

Cate’s Diary

Well..

When I get ideas, they are BIG. And crazy.

Time to backtrack I guess. A few days ago, while I was sleeping, I found a tea cart full of books in the rabbit hole. They were part of the horde Miss Emily tucked away, so I decided to give a read. They were about building Sacred Space, and they were fascinating… While I was reading, I realized that I was allowing childhood fears and forms limit what my own brain can do. Well fuck that noise! Using the books, and my own imagination, I rebuilt. It’s a crazy blend of Brookgreen, Biltmore, and Longwood, with some of Alice’s adventures to spice it up.. Not a bad Memory Palace, and long overdue for an upgrade…

Last night, after our adventure in the cemetery, Miss Rebecca texted me. She said it was time to get me ready for the Dispute. I was low, and said there was no point, but she said there was still hope yet.  She said she saw the while thing, and that William *did* remember me, but he was struggling in the dark.  She has an idea, but we’ll need Penny’s help to pull it off.

Diana decided to take me out, and used some of her skills to disguise ourselfs.  She took me to NJ to an Anarch rave.  That was..  Wow.  Um..  Anyway, when we got home, and just after we’d gotten cleaned up, Miss Rebecca called and said she was nearby.  When she got to the house, Diana was pissed.  She said she was rushing things, and that I was not ready.  Rebecca said that they were working against the clock, and I had to be prepared.  Diana took off, in a bit of a huff, but I think she’ll be o.k.

Rebeca and I talked, and she asked me if she could see the Memory Palace.  When we arrived, we landed in the gardens, and Rebecca was very impressed.  She said that the construct cold in fact help me save myself.  She then took me to a place in my head, like the belltower at Longwood, but on a *BIG* hill.  I could see for miles, and there were two binocular posts.  One that said “What I Remember” and one that said “What *REALLY* Happened”.  She says I need to use them to find out who I have harmed in my existence as a Vampire, and somehow make amends for the wrongs I have done.  She said I’ll probably break the Masquerade to do it, but I have to in order to succeed.  She also said that I needed to talk with Father Mesrob more.  

I am of two minds here…  The Father is a fine man, one of the best I know, and he has been a rock to me, in keeping my morals mostly intact.  BUT, he has a parish to care for, people that look to him, and if I involve him in this, any more than he already is, I could put him in serious danger.  Since my darling man is not here, Father M has been the only person whose character I can truly trust.  No matter how much I love Diana, or Katrine they are Vampires.  Their morals are compromised.  Penny and Miss Emily have their own battles to fight. However, let’s not forget, Vartan will KILL me if something happens to him... Shit, I'd deserve it if I let something happen. I guess it’s full consent, as Diana says.

Anyway, while Rebecca and I were talking in the conservatory, I heard some conversations... Some passing things that made connections in my head. I think I know who we have to worry about. Proof though... That's the issue. I need proof before I send Diana to go get herself killed.... Dear Lord help me.

[catelyn-h]

Cate’s Diary

Oh.  Oh Lord...  Please.  Why did I have to decide to make myself a damned thing?  What did I do that You felt I had to endure this?

He doesn’t remember.  He..  

Oh God please..

And Anna..  She said Tommy called.  Daddy knows.  That damn cop that went with Father M let something slip.  Oh Lord if you have any mercy left for something like me, please don’t let him see me like this...  I don’t want him to know I’m a monster..

She was so pretty....  

[catelyn-h]

Cate’s Diary

((Written on notepaper, tucked into the journal..))

Does NOTHING ever go as planned?  I suppose I should be used to it, but damn.  

I woke up this evening with a semi-brilliant idea...  Get Diana to impersonate me when we met the hunters, and I could sneak around behind to make sure they’re on the up and up.  Diana was all for it, and she sounded just like me over the phone!  I told her I’d need an hour, and to meet me at St. Sarkis’..

I was ready to head out, when Bill showed up at my room, and said Hepzibah wanted to see me.  She was in the conservatory, and she was pissed off.  She was working with one of the books Miss Emily gave me, and not having much success with it.  She is still suspicious of me, but Alister was right.  They need me.  

She said in a month or so, everything would be in place for the cage to open.. She claims that she wants to keep it shut, and she wants to use the thing under the Chantry as epoxy to hold the cage together.  She said she did not want to destroy the world, since the Tremere need time to rule it...

She gave me permission to go get Katrine, but she would not let me take Jenny, and said Xerxes was “on Assignment”.  I don’t like that.  I need to find out where he is.  He’s supposed to keep me safe, but I have an obligation to him too.  I also don’t like that she’s using Jenny like a hostage.  I am still not certain that Hepzibah isn’t looking into her head, like Wundt has...

After I left the Chantry, I called Father Mesrob.  He aid he had time to meet with me, and said he’d meet me right outside, since he saw me.  CRAP!  Hepzibah had kept me too long, and Diana had already gotten there...  I called her, and got her to leave, but damage was done.  By the time I got there, Vartan had arrived and was talking with the Father.  I apologized, and said that Roxxie had been sick, and I needed to run back, but I knew they both knew I was lying.  Father Mesrob indicated that he was going to SC to help with the churches that have burned, and asked for Daddy’s information....  

We went inside, and sat in his office, where he basically told us he knew what was up.  He never said the word, but he did not have to.  He said he could tell we both were trying to stay good, moral people, but that some of the Parishioners could tell, and that if something happened to him, his deacon Vikan, was not as understanding..  He also said Wundt had been there.  Father Mesrob said that he’d been seen a few times (though the old devil does not know it..), and the Father has seen him watching me...  Father said to tell Wundt that he was welcome to the church if he respected God and the community, but otherwise, to stay away.

I did give Father Mesrob Daddy’s contact info, and begged him not to mention me when he called.  I told him to say Annie gave him the number.  He was also willing to drop the journal in the mail to her, if he did not hear from me in a few days.  Before we left, he kindly prayed with us, and wished us luck.  

We met with Diana, and Roxxie was anxious to go.  I’d asked her to see if she could find Luci, and boy she was good!  She led us to a sandhog tunnel near the bridge.  I’d called Terry and Penny, but they were gonna be a while.  Diana went on forward to scout, and Vartan and I waited for them.  When they arrived we headed in (deja vu, much??), and we hit water fairly soon.  There was a huge metal door in the way, but Terry and Vartan managed to open it.  We were in Nos territory, which made me nervous, but we pressed on.  After a while, there was some light, and we could hear noises, like a machine shop.  We’d found a dock of some kind in the tunnel, and there were about 2 dozen folks working on weapons and assorted vehicles.  We also saw a big cage, and poor Luci was in it, thrashing around.  

That old bull gator was PISSED.  I wouldn’t wanna be within 5 feet of him, but he managed to smell us out, and was able to tell me that Katrine was alive, but on another level of the tunnel.  Meanwhile some folks were talking about shooting Luci with something, so he’d cause a “distraction for the vampires.”  One of those MiB types was hanging around threatening to shoot him, while Clay was arguing against it.  Seems like Clay had had enough of his friend Jamal’s antics.  

We finally got a good look at Jamal..  He appeared to be taking something that the Technocratic boys had come up with.  His veins were almost glowing to my sight, and then the bastard shot Luci with it.  That poor old Gator fought whatever it was they pumped him full of.  He told me he did not want to hurt me, but soon enough he was gone, and all I could feel from him was hunger.  

About that point, Vartan pulled his Superman act.  He jumped up almost 30 feet, and damn near destroyed the scaffolding Clay and Jamal were on.  Jamal almost fell off, but the bastard managed to keep standing and held on to his gun.  Terry, not to be outdone, managed to get to Luci’s cage, and used his magic to knock him on out.  Roxxie was pretty intent on getting to Jamal, and went running for him.  Penny had hidden herself in the Shadowlands, and was using her magic to throw off our foes’ aim somehow.  Good thing too!  Right about then, they all opened fire on Vartan and Terry. 

Luckily they weren’t hurt, but I was over it.  I managed to get up and used the Flame spells Alistair taught me to get Jamal to drop his gun. Of course the two of them took off running.  Once the bosses had left, it was every man for himself, and we were pretty much left alone.. Vartan and I realized if Clay and Jamal got away, we’d have to deal with them another night, so we gave chase.

We’d almost caught up with them when chaos broke loose.  The damn floor came out from under us, and we fell.  I don’t know how far, but it was a drop.  Clay and Jamal had gotten caught as well, which meant this *wasn’t* their trap.  I was untangling myself, when Clay decided to help me up.  (How chivalrous..)  When I told him not to call me baby, he actually said he could not believe that I was *still* holding his infidelity against him.  I really did not wanna get into it right then, but my mouth got away from me..  Before we could really get ugly, I heard Diana’s voice.  I had made contact with her earlier since my senses have improved enough to encompass telepathy (!),,  She’d been fighting another Vampire, so I was unsuprised to Sabbat surrounding us.  

We were really fucked.  From what they said, I could tell they were what Diana had called Paladins.  Terry said they were major bad news, and from what I could gather, we’d die without too much effort on their part.  Of course Vartan was more than willing to give it the old college try.  But suddenly one of the more powerful Sabbat said we had the Ephemera, and we could not be killed.  Several of his subordinates started to argue loud and long, and under that cover, who did we hear, but Mr. Wundt.  

That old troll managed to find us AGAIN.  He said that he did not care about Katrine, but since she was dear to *me* why..,  *UGH*  He suggested we give the Sabbat what they wanted.  I was in confusion, until Terry cleared it up for me.  The books Emily gave me.  I told them that I did not have them, and in any case, I certainly did not have a copy HERE. Terry asked to take my hand, and he said there was a copy in my head.  When I said he was mad, Penny pointed out that the books Emily gave me were like a bomb set to go off.  The Sabbat would have as hard a time as Hepzibah.  Especially if we only gave them *one* book.  I finally agreed, and Terry was able to create a copy from what I remembered..

In the meantime, Clay and Jamal were rather flustered by Mr. Wundt’s sudden arrival.  I was actually fairly amused by Jamal and Wundt facing off against each other.  I’d be willing to pay money to watch that fight, short as it would be...  He also confirmed my worst fears.  He plans on making one of them his newest child.  When I showed anger at this, he mocked me, saying he had no idea I had feelings for Jamal... 

The Sabbat finally stopped arguing amongst themselves, and we arranged a trade.  Katrine AND safe passage out, for the book.  The leader, who asked to correspond with me, (!!) said his name was Ruthven of Tzimice, and he agreed to the deal.  He sent someone to bring us Katrine, as my phone buzzed.  Jeff Armsley was there, and told us to move to a certain point of the room, and that travel was being arranged.  Katrine was brought to us, and she was a mess.  She’d been staked, and was naked.  Terry pulled out a spare shirt he’d brought, that fit Katrine like a dress, and we got the stake out of her.  Our transport arrived, and suddenly...  We were in Chicago!

Apparently Robert Armsley decided we were worth helping, since that’s who pulled out fat from the fire.  They got us some fresh clothes, and had some pig Bblood for Katrine.  I was just ready to collapse, but we still had issues to deal with...  First off we had to deal with Clay, Jamal and Lee Ann.  Penny said they should turn Lee Ann over to some mages that deal with the dead.  She said they would be fair, and possibly help her get Justice.  As for Jamal and Clay...  Jamal they locked up, but said that they cold not hold him forever.  As to Clay, they let him go along with us. He admitted he’d helped kill Dacosta, The Turk and Vega, but Katrine said that he would not let Jamal torture her, so there is some humanity in him...

While we were talking, I called Alistair to let him know what had gone on.  He and Armsley have had some history, to put it mildly, and there were some verbal fireworks, but mostly everyone was too tired to fight.  I told Alistair what Hepzibah was up to with Xerxes and Jenny, and he was not pleased.  I also told him we’d had to give a copy of one of the books to the Sabbat, and he was FURIOUS.  He was also pissed off that Wundt had stepped in.  He told us to report directly to him from now on.  Armsley asked about the books, and when I explained, he asked permission to get in my head.  Since Alistair trusted him, I allowed it.  Holy Crap!!  He said Miss Emily had put an entire mystic library in my head!!   I was shocked to say the least.  He said Miss Emily’s put a damn big bet down that when (if) I become mortal again, I’ll be awakened, and she was seeing to my education.  Hell he said the library in my head was bigger than HIS!  

Since it was getting closer and closer to dawn, he kindly sent us back to New York, and we popped out in the cellar at the Gallery.  Since I have spare room, I saw to it that Vartan and Katrine were tucked in safe and sound, and I was gonna try to make it back to the chantry, but I really doubted the time would work.  Terry and Clay were also getting some sleep before they left.  I think Terry is afraid that I’ll kill Clay if he’s not here.  And to be honest....  I am not sure if I would or not.  I mean, I would not kill him here, in William’s home, but to save him from Wundt’s attentions...  I’d damn well consider it.  

And I don’t think he’d get that it wasn’t from anger, or vengance.  Yeah, he blew up my life.  I gave up Paris, and my dream job, and....  But still and all, I loved him.  I loved him for a long time.  Maybe I still do in some way.  Even though I love William more, and he’s the only one I’d go through this insanity for, Clay still has a piece of me..  So could I kill him?  Would I?  I mean I tried to start a fight with him earlier, so it would make me mad, and be easier, but it just made me sad instead...

Dawn’s coming.  Guess I’ll pull the shutters, lock the door, and get some sleep.  I’ll shoot Father Mesrob an e-mail to let him know I’ll be by tomorrow to pick up the package, and then call Jenny so she can tell Hepzibah I’ll be back in the chantry first thing tomorrow night...  Good Lord help me....

[catelyn-h]

Cate’s Diary (later)

Don’t know how safe this is gonna be.  Chambers in the chantry are *supposed* to be inviolate, but..  I don’t think I am so concerned with the journal being IN my rooms. I think I am more concerned with it getting OUT if has to…

Well, on the surface it appears that we have managed to pull this off.  But I think I am very much under suspicion here.  Bill is treating me differently, and Hephzibah…  Wundt also thinks she suspects something, and I tend to agree.  (How damn bad a night do I have to have that WUNDT can make me laugh??)   Court was utter hell.  Things started well enough.  I had to give up the books Emily gave me, but it’s interesting.  I could read them *easily* but it seems Bill and the others are having a MUCH harder time of it. (He did say there was some kind of protection keyed to me, so that could be it.)  When we were talking Hephzibah said she smelled the Gentry on me. I managed to dodge that for now, but she said she knew about “my Ghost”, and wanted to know what Emily and Rebecca promised me.  I really had to dance.  I did tell her Rebecca mentioned Golconda, and she acted like a cat I’d thrown boiling water on.  She told me that no matter what Rebecca had said, Golconda was a dirty lie.  That she had tried, and gained nothing…  

I finally managed to drop the dime on Alister, and things went to hell FAST.  She demanded he turn his hand over, and actually used discipline in court.  NOT the way I hoped things would go, especially since we gained the Duchess’ attentions..  Wundt played his part excellently, getting Mr. Joseph on the phone, and announcing that Allister Archon status had been renewed.  Oh Hephzibah was havin a hissy!!  Then Wundt announced my family was under the Archonate’s protection…. By the time we left it was a madhouse. As we left I finally met the Hag..

My, oh my.  She is not a fool.  She saw through everything, but apparently is not a fan of Hephzibah’s.  She agreed to keep my secrets safe.  She wants me to bring her the Hunters for vengeance over Vega. I am not willing to hand them over for *him* but if Katrine is hurt, she gets their heads, regardless of anyone’s feelings on the matter…  

After talking with her, I went over to snag Vartan.  He was speaking to one of the loveliest women I have seen in a long time.  Her name is Yasmine, and she is a Brujah, originally from Saudi Arabia.  As we were going, she said something about a date!  With VARTAN!  I mean, it’s not like he’s repulsive or anything, but he’s always ALL BUSINESS… He’s a good friend, and I respect him greatly, but the idea of a date, well..  I have to giggle a little.   I suppose I shouldn’t though.  Especially after the cock up at Fulton St…

We headed over there to meet Penny, and oh boy were we stupid.  I guess I was too cocky from the work Penny did at World Financial, so when she pulled Leeann out of Roxxie’s collar and said I was the best option since Allister taught me dominate, I tried it.  The bitch jumped in my body and tried to bolt.   Vartan was quick though.   He tackled my body, and I managed to force her out.  Of course in the meantime, Leeann had raised a fuss and got the beat cops attention.  Boy we had to bullshit our way out of *that* mess.  Luckily Penny had managed to get Leeann back, and she got us a cab back to my place.  Penny is vowing might vengeance, and I can’t argue.  Aside from ruining my dress, stockings and shoes, the bitch really almost upset the whole applecart.    

Nasty surprise when we got back.  My place was open.  I have no CLUE how the fuck they got in, since I changed the locks when I realized Katrine might have been caught. We went in and no one was there, but Clay had left a note, telling us to show up at the Brooklyn Bridge tomorrow, unarmed. At midnight no less.  How cliché!

The assholes also broke into the Haven, but of course they had to use an Arc Welder to get in! HA!  I don’t know what they got off my computers, but we’ll have to assume quite a bit.  I could not stay there, so I had to reluctantly go to the Chantry.  Since Allister is officially stricken from the Chantry records, I inherit his possessions.  His chambers, his domains, Jenny and Xerxes.  Jenny was thrilled that I would be taking her back as my ghoul, but I am worried about Xerxes.  Hephzibah took him off someplace, and I have no idea what she’s up to…  The only good part of the night was thanks to Vartan. He managed to contact one of his friends in the police department, and was able to get camera images of William!

My poor sweet man seems to be wandering a little aimlessly around NY.  It seems like he is indulging in experience.  Is he searching?  I can’t tell, but it was so sweet, yet heartbreaking at the same time..  If we live through tomorrow, if I can find him… Perhaps I can help him.  Lord willing.

Good Lord. Tomorrow.  How many folks can we get killed?  Penny and Terry are both insisting that they are going to come with us, as well as Jenny.  I want to say no, but I am way too much of a realist.  We need the help.  But my God if any of them die….  How can I tell Anna the man she loves died helping me save another Vampire.  

 O.K.  So…

Worst case: everyone I would usually ask to take care of last things will be with us.  So.  Maybe Father Mesrob would be willing to mail a package for me.  I know he suspects something is up with our little band, but I believe he knows that I really am striving to do right, so he may be kind enough to do a small favor for me.  

I think I may have the twinkling of an idea…  Need to make some calls before dawn, and hope this works..  

[catelyn-h]

Cate’s Diary (early evening)

Well.  That was…. interesting.  Got everything as set as I can for the games tonite.

 Have to say, Mr. Wundt was almost pleasant (!).  He was just ugly as sin to Penny, but Mr. Mistoffeles kept him vaguely polite.  It was interesting being the fly on the wall during their conversation.  Wundt actually admitted he pushes folks away as a defense mechanism.  I have to say I’ve developed a bit of pity for Mr. Wundt, but doubt I’d tell him that.  It would just make him more prickly than he is now.  I have to say my feelings about him have become decidedly mixed.  He can be almost likeable then he can reverse course on a dime and be an utter bastard, especially if there is an audience. Though I must say he was kind of amused that he misjudged Kitty so much..   I don’t believe that he will ever be a friend in the way that most folks define the word.  I mean he’ll never be the first person I call to go to the movies with, but I think I can say he’s a frenemy… (Till he pisses me off again…)

In any event, Penny managed to catch Leeann.  My God the girl is nearly pure spite and rage.  I understand her anger, it’s valid, but her rage spills over to all of us. Penny pulled us over to the Shadowlands, and Wundt did *something* to her.  Penny put her in Roxxie’s collar, and somehow her presence was able to mask the Tremere blood, and made me unreadable.  (Wish that I could keep *that* ability….)  Once we’re done at Court, I need to get with Penny so she can question Leeann about the hunters, and we can hopefully find Katrine.  Here’s hoping that we’ll manage to pull this off…