you give me butterflies~
She was nervous the whole drive. She had been nervous the entire night before, knowing already that she was blowing off school and driving to see Sav. The gap of time between them was her fault, but she was glad that it was almost as if it was not there but she knew better. Aside from that though, here she was, standing in front of his door at 9 in the morning and she felt a small wave of panic rush through her. What if it wasn't that simple? Not to mention the fact that there was no Jake. There was no Anya. It was just Sav and her and this whole world of mixed feelings and the past. Well, for her, at least. She hated how she was so set on not being with anybody but a few conversations with Sav had her stomach fluttering with butterflies and her thoughts fuzzy with him entirely. She had never really confronted anything dealing with him in the past because he had been in love with Anya, then married her while she had her whole deal with Jake. Like everything else in her life, it had been a mess. And so here she stood, months later, free and still in this weird cycle of not knowing what it was when it came to Sav. Honestly, she was sort of content with pushing it all deep inside of a box and sitting on top of it because it meant not dealing with it. She didn't want to do that, especially when she'd just gotten him back as a friend.
No, it was better this way. To just sit on that box full of a million thoughts and reasons and feelings and just focus on patching their friendship up. Which in the end, meant more than anything to her. Not that anybody could probably tell from the way she basically pushed him away and ended things. She felt sick now, shaking her head as she took in some air and reminded herself that having an episode in front of his door would be dumb. It was Sav. It would be the fun weekend that they both needed. They would eat food, catch up, watch movies and have conversations about everything and nothing. It was Sav. He was her very best friend, despite everything. Rolling her eyes at herself, she raised her hand and knocked softly on the door. Twice, three times and then she stepped back. The door opened and she smiled politely at who she gathered to be his room mate. The perverted one. She thanked him quietly but stepped around him and made her way to where Sav was asleep. His bed really was small but she had shared with him before. No big deal, right? She laid her bag at the end of his bed and carefully toed her shoes off before climbing into the bed beside him. She was fully intending to go right back to sleep, it wasn't often she got to just sleep, really. So Clare, pulled the blanket up and snuggled her body underneath, her head finding the pillow in a matter of seconds and that feeling of comfort filling her up instantly.