How do you like your steak done?
Let’s be honest, “technically,” I shouldn’t indulge in mortal pleasures like steak. As an Elf, my diet is supposed to consist of fruits, grains, and the finest offerings of Yavanna. 🌿✨ Yes, you guessed it right, my diet is also a constant topic of council debate. And while some advisors would love to crown me Lord of the Leaves 🥬👑, I’ll admit: on rare, highly supervised occasions, I’ve allowed myself a bit of indulgence. 🍷🥩✨ SHH… don’t make a fuss. (Just a feast here, a grand ceremony there…)
Having clarified this:
The art of the steak requires a balance of precision and patience, much like ruling a kingdom (except the kingdom doesn’t sizzle, and the council doesn’t come with a side of mashed potatoes… and dessert. Oh, dessert! 🔥👑). Now, back to the steak:
Rare? Too reckless. I prefer my battles well-thought-out, not my meals like an impromptu orc raid. 🍖💥
Well-done? I already have enough of that, thank you. Some things need to be tender (my meals and my patience included).
Medium-rare? Ah, perfection! Just the right amount of precision, like an expert spear wielder 😏… but significantly more delicious. 👑✨
But well, as long as half the court watches my plate like it’s the fate of Middle-earth itself. 🍽️✨ Veggies, legumes, couscous, and kale will determine my fate.
With warmth (and one salad to rule them all 🥬✨),
Gil-galad 👑✨
PS: But please DO send more pastries. 🍰🍪