i feel like I’m suffocating where are you

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i feel like I’m suffocating where are you
Idk if being here is worth being sad all the time
I miss who you were and what we had.. I miss feeling happy next to you...
sometimes I wonder if you’re a conman. You sold me on such a perfect future. the ideal life. Yet here I am moving between one misery to another
I feel like I’m suffocating here. I feel like I’m never going to be able to leave. I feel like all the happiness has left. I feel rotten and empty at the same time
Being with the idea of you leaves a sweeter taste then the actual reality of what you have become
You’re possible rejection to my needs no longer brings hours of contemplation but instead frustrated tears of pain
Being without you is harder then being with you. I find myself missing too much about you so soon.