#cryingbride

[hipsterweddingblr-blog]

We asked them to write a letter to each other. After reading those letters, she began to cry. A happy and joyful crying for those beautiful words from her husband. 2018 is starting, direct us now for your Wedding Wedding gown @ricoamona #cryingbride #weddingportraits (at Da Nang, Vietnam)

[jadedliebrarian]

I fuckin hate flowers

People cry on their wedding day. 

Grooms cry when their brides walk down the aisle. Parents cry when they hand over their daughters to their soon-to-be husbands (or that the wedding cost them a lot of money). Guests cry because they feel emotional about the whole wedding thing.

And then there are the crying brides that tend to cry a lot even about the most petty things on their wedding day.

I was one of them... And I too cried because of the petty thing I’d like to call: “My flowers were not fucking pink story.”

Aside from the gown, the veil, the shoes, and other bride-y ornaments that brides wear on their wedding day, their bouquet of flowers pretty much ascends their ‘i’m the bride’ tone to the whole wedding thing. Here in the Philippines, most popular bridal bouquets would either be the round one (ball- type) or the showery type.

Round

Shower or cascading

As for my case, since I went with the ‘somewhat vintage’ wedding theme, and that I wanted to remake my mom’s bridal flowers back in her wedding in the 90′s, I opted for the cascading flower type. 

My husband and I agreed at first that we won’t be allotting budget for fresh flowers since we were running out of funds then, and that he knows that I pity real flowers being cut from their stems. Before, I’m one of those girls who’d prefer not having flowers for special occasions because I would just want to look and smell at them planted, that being cut down and arranged. 

So, our original plan was to just improvise on something in exchange for real bridal flowers. 

Choices went down to:

a.) Paper bridal flowers - but were too time-consuming to make. And even though we had our friends to back us up in making these, still, we lacked the grandeur of time, and the artsy-fartsy-ness

b.) Pastillas bouquet - but were quite expensive. Though mind you, we almost ended-up picking these. Because 1) they are edible. Having to wait for the wedding ceremony to start, and even to wait for the reception could really cause stomach-cramps. And so, These flowers were very delectable for the low-sugar me and for our diabetic bridal entourage hehe. 2) they are pre-made. https://www.facebook.com/sweetblooms sells these beautifully made bridal Pastillas bouquets that you can choose from. Sadly though, they didn’t match our motif of pink and silver. And then, if we opted to make the whole bridal entourage with these ‘flowers’ it would’ve been very costly for us. 

c.) Ferrero bouquet - the thought of having these as my bridal bouquet was quite exciting. But then when we asked for the price, our faces turned :( Here in the Philippines, these Ferrero flower bouquets cost around 500php to 1000php depending on the arrangement and number of Ferreros placed in it. Plus, my husband said that its color (gold) would contradict with our theme; and that the person we talked to showed us ‘bridal’ ferrero bouquet design that didn’t match our ideals. So mehh... And then also considering the fact of producing smaller versions of these for the whole entourage is again, costly. 

Mind you, I made it clear with my husband that our budget for the whole flowers thing would cost not more than 3000php. If we find cheaper than that, well then good. Because again, I’m one of the no-to-picking-of-flowers advocate, and I think that it’s impractical to spend a lot on flowers to be used for a day just for decoration...

So, four days before our wedding, we ended up scampering the streets of Dangwa in Sampaloc, Manila.

(photo not mine)

Being a graduate of UST, I thought I knew the ways of the people selling flowers in Dangwa... I was very wrong.

We got there late afternoon wearing house clothes and brought only 700php because our sole purpose was to canvass the prices of flowers and materials and then ask for friends’ help to make the bridal entourage’s flowers and my bridal bouquet. 

But then after an hour of walking, the heat of the sun almost toasting us, the weight of my tummy wanting me to always sit-down, the sellers blocking us with their sales talks, we finally let our guard down.

Upon crossing the street, a lady approached us and instantly knew what we were looking for. Tired, we followed her to her stall which was located just on the sidewalk of Dimasalang street.

She did a lot of freakin talks that passed through my ears without me really listening, and then led us to flower stalls and ask us to choose which flowers she’ll be using for the bouquet, and then asked 500php from us to buy ribbons and other stuff for the bouquet, and then she did a small bouquet demo... And then lo and behold, even before we say yes to her, she was already writing a list of the whole bridal entourage, readying us to sign the contract and remembering it makes me furious and sdfnasjfdbaskdbaskjblb!!NJFBWEJKfbwejkbfdsj!!!

Anyway...

What made me and my husband said yes to her was when she said, “all in all 2,500php po.” And we were like “ahhh... okay.” Still clinged to our budget. So we bid her goodbye with that almost-like-holdapped 500php as our downpayment and the hopes that our bridal flowers would end up ok.

2 days before the wedding, she was constantly calling me on my phone asking for more money, like 1,000php for again, downpayment. When then I recalled she said, “bayaran nyo na lang yung the rest kapag diniliver ko na.” (just pay the rest [of the fee] when I deliver [the flowers]. I went furious again because I was having my maniped and that she incessantly called me for the money. I even replied to her saying “Ate sabi mo bayaran na lang namin the rest kapag nadeliver mo na. O wala pa naman po kayong nadedeliver. (you said we’ll just pay the rest when you deliver it. You haven’t delivered anything yet, why do we need to pay?” But then she said, “Pasensya na, kailangan ko din ng pera.” (forgive me, I need money too) Oh good Lord... What have we gotten into...

That thing called pasensya (direct english translation: patience. But when used in our language, may be translated as ‘pardon’) -A Filipino trait that sometimes let irresponsible people get away from their misgivings. 

And given I’m a Filipino too, and that my husband is the peace-loving type, he rushed to a money-transfer shop and sent 1,000php to that annoying lady... Because of pasensya... And that he pitied the lady... And that he talked me to reason that 500php is not enough for them to possibly make our wedding flowers even though again, I recalled, and I firmly heard she said “ano naman akala mo sa ‘min, walang pera? Sige na, okay na yang 500 pang-down nyo,” when I insisted that we’ll just go back the next day because we didn’t bring enough money, but still... She fuckin insisted. 

So hear this: even being an 8-years student of a school that resides closest to Dangwa, and at times, received bouquets made from Dangwa, still, I know nothing about their antics, their haranguing ways to lure their customers into their lairs, and of course, their crude, dirty, annoying schemes. >:(

Ok so the wedding day.

I was almost about to poo all my intestines out the morning of my wedding day. My parents weren’t at the hotel yet, the MUA came in too early (too early that I hadn’t taken a bath yet), I was all alone in my room, and then the flowers came. 

I and my husband went to the lobby to pay them up because they let the taxi wait for them so they could leave instantly because the meter was running.

To my fucking surprise, these were my flowers:

These were definitely not pink Roses, or pink Malaysian Mumps, or fresh Star-gazers. Star-gazers’ scent can be smelled a feet-away but mine has nothing even if you poke your nose inside the flower! Minutes before I walked down the aisle, my baby brother were picking my flowers, on the floor, because they kept on falling!!!!! And then for some reason I don’t know, some of my entourage didn’t receive their flowers so during their walk and the pictorial, they were holding... nothing. Crap.

I was seriously not going to pay that manloloko heck of a lady holdapper that made my flowers. But then my husband said, “yaan mo na. 2,500php lang yan.” Which my father said the same when I went back to my room crying... That my mother added with a scold “hindi kasi kayo nagtatanong.” Like as if they she knows the cruel jest of Dangwa...

When I was inside the bridal car, I told myself that I had to force a smile for all the people to see and to hide my ‘petty’ annoyance that my flowers were pitiful. I told myself that I have to look pretty and blushing like all the brides in the movies because I don’t want the people to think that I shallowly cried over my flowers...

But then, that thought changed when I was behind the church’s closed door. All I was telling myself was, not to trip during my walk. I won’t mind my flowers falling, as long as I won’t trip because of my gown, or of the carpet. But still, I had to force a smile.

Passing through the church’s last pews, I forced a smile. But then it changed to tears when I reached for my parents’ arms halfway down my walk on the aisle. 

And then it changed into a smile again, a real, genuine smile. 

Seeing my husband shedding some tears at the altar, made me smile. Not that I like the idea that’s he’s crying, but the thought that a few more steps and I’ll be his’ forever. 

So looking back, here’s a photo of me walking down the aisle with my parents.

All smiles. 

The flowers didn’t matter. 

All I wanted at that moment was to join hands with my then-fiancé. 

The flowers didn’t matter whether it’s not pink, not made of Roses, or almost dead-looking.

All my eyes saw was my husband wiping his tears away as I approached the altar.

The flowers didn’t matter when I handed them over to my maid of honor...

Because by then, I was holding my husband’s hand, ready to exchange our wedding vows. 

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But now, I still hate flowers in bouquets. Flowers as plants are great though. :P