The foul tip was a 95-mph missile, and it found its mark dead center on his cup. The impact sent a shockwave of agony through his entire pelvis, and he dropped to the dirt like a sack of bricks, gasping for air. While the cup saved his manhood from being pulverized, it transferred the force into a deep, bruising pain. He refused the trainer's offer to inspect his nuts, struggling to all fours and finishing the game with a dull, throbbing ache. Later, in the privacy of the locker room, he saw the damage: his balls were swollen to the size of plums, and the head of his cock was scraped raw, an angry red. For a week, his nightly erections became torturous events, waking him with searing pain that brought tears to his eyes. He couldn't beat off, couldn't even think about dating, and the resulting blue balls were a constant, heavy misery. Then the wet dreams started, his body betraying him as his swollen balls would painfully convulse, forcing a load of cum through his raw, scraped cockhead in a agonizing, humiliating release.
Freshman-K-28 shared his 6th grade PE class experience
Still remember vividly my 6 h grade P E class , first year of having to strip for gym in a locker room with other boys , having to wear a jock strap with plastic cup , numbered gym uniform with reversible shirt and very short gym shorts , having to do running and other calistenics the whole period then at the end the mandatory shower time , hated the random jock strap inspections that happened weekly. Was 11 when i started 6 th grade junior high.
are there any cups, plates or silverware that need to be taken to the sink? bring those to the kitchen and you can wash them later!
have you made your bed today? if you haven’t, be sure to make it! a neat bed is much more comfy than a messy one
are there any clothes on the floor that need to be taken to the laudry? be sure to take dirty clothes to the laundry and hang up or fold & put away any clean ones!
are there any empty hangers in your closet? take those to wherever you keep extra hangers
is there any trash on your floor/bed/dresser/nightstand? throw that in the trash!
does your floor need vacuumed? if so, vacuum or pick up the big pieces and throw them away.
Album Review by Bradley Christensen
Cup Check – Continuity
Record Label: Self-released
Release Date: February 9 2018
Let’s talk about pop-punk, shall we? It’s been a long time since I’ve talked about an album, EP, or band within pop-punk, emo, or even alternative, but I’ll be honest – I don’t really like a lot of this music anymore. I’ve talked about that before, especially a couple of years ago, but I wanted to write an updated version of my thoughts on pop-punk, emo, and alternative. I used to love pop-punk around six years ago. It was the spring of 2012, and two albums that I vividly remember getting me into the genre, at least even more than I already was, were Fall Out Boy’s 2003 LP, Take This To Your Grave (I’m a big Fall Out Boy fan, but the only album I hadn’t heard was their debut, and I managed to find a copy at Walmart, of all places) and The Story So Far’s 2012 LP, Under Soil And Dirt. Those two albums made me fall in love with pop-punk as a whole, and for the next few years, that’s all I listened to. I had that cringy pop-punk phase, trust me, but I still love some bands / albums from that era of my music taste. Bands like Handguns, Hit The Lights, Carousel Kings, Settle Your Scores, Broadside, and a handful of other acts are ones that I still love today. My feelings started to change on the genre, however, around 2016, because I found myself caring less and less about the scene itself. Part of that, and I’ll be honest, is because of how many allegations and accusations were being slung at every pop-punk band. I didn’t know if I wanted to be associated with a genre that’s known for housing sexual predators / pedophiles, although these bands are in the minority, since it’s not every single band, but I just didn’t feel right listening to that kind of music, because of that. The major reason why I fell out of favor with pop-punk is that both the music and lyrics just didn’t appeal to me anymore. I fell in love with pop-punk in the first place, because of how well I could relate to the lyrics from many of these bands, most of which talk about relationships, heartache, and teenage relationships. I was going through a lot around that time, so I could connect to a lot of these lyrics insanely well, especially compared to other genres of music.
After all of those issues disappeared, and I began to find myself in a better headspace when it came to relationships, I didn’t want to listen to whiny, angsty, and somewhat misogynistic lyricism anymore. That’s not to say I felt like I “grew out of it,” because there are bands I still enjoy, but I just felt like the genre wasn’t appealing to me anymore, whether it was for being more mature than a lot of these bands and lyrics, as well as the music itself not quite sticking the landing. I noticed that a lot of newer bands, and I still feel this way today, just aren’t doing anything that interesting. You got a couple, here and there, such as The Gospel Youth. That’s a band I need to revisit again, since I might have a bit unfair to their debut LP in 2017, but that’s besides the point. For the most part, though, these bands are just boring, generic, and uninteresting. That could very well be that pop-punk is moving into a more “emo” direction. A lot of bands are going softer, more atmospheric, and less energetic. I kind of liked some of these bands, but those bands still had an “oomph” to them, versus being boring and monotonous, so it’s a case of the music itself just not doing much for me anymore. Instead of being jaded, whiny, and angry about it, I just walked away from the scene. Sometimes that’s what you have to do. A style of music doesn’t do much for you anymore, so you just find something else that you like. Believe you me, I’ve found plenty more to enjoy since then, and even around that time, I was discovering a lot of stuff. I still hear about these bands, thanks to knowing a lot of people that like them, but it’s not for me anymore. That’s what makes the EP that I’ll be talking about today so special, because it’s from a pop-punk band that I still very much enjoy. That would be the Illinois act Cup Check, a band that I’ve been following for the last few years now. It’s crazy that they released their debut EP in 2015, but here we are, three years later, with their third EP.
If you don’t remember, and you probably don’t, I thought that debut EP, 2015’s Benchwarmers, was a solid little easycore EP that was a bit rough around the edges, but I thought they had a lot of potential. 2016’s Jouska, however, was a big step up. I loved that EP, and I still do today, because they matured a bit. They added elements of shoegaze, indie, and alternative rock. This EP was more hook-driven, and less pop-punky, I guess you could say. I liked how it was a bit more straightforward, versus being on the pop-punk side of things. They were kind of experimenting a bit with their sound, and I really enjoyed that. I didn’t even know they were releasing a new EP, entitled Continuity, but when I saw it came out, I decided to pick it up and check it out. I’ve listened to it a few times, here and there, but I love this thing. This EP takes what they were doing on Jouska, and takes that even further, because I’d say this isn’t even much of a pop-punk record. This is more alt-rock, and I’m totally fine with that, because I really like that sound from this band. Continuity is more hook-driven this time around, and it’s got more of a laidback, alt-rock sound, versus pop-punk or easycore, but that doesn’t bother me, considering that vocalist Michaela Kramer kills these hooks. When I first heard her voice three years ago, on Benchwarmers, I liked her voice a lot, but I thought it was a bit rough around the edges. That changed a lot on Jouska, because her voice got a hell of a lot better, just like how it has here. Her voice is amazing on this record, and she sells the lyrics, which I’ll talk about more in a minute, as well as the overall emotion on the record. Despite only being about 18 minutes, it’s a pretty compelling listen, and part of that is for its lyrics. I fell out of love with pop-punk for the whiny, angsty, and angry lyrics that I just couldn’t relate to anymore, but the lyrics on Continuity feel real, mature, and adult.
Look at the lyrics to “Cortland,” more specifically the hook, “How am I supposed to move on without getting the closure that I deserve? I'm afraid to be happy, because you could change your mind. What if someone else will love me like you don't?” I love this hook, because it’s not whiny or angsty. That’s not to say that those lyrics don’t have their place, because they do. Teenagers tend to be overdramatic, especially high school kids, and I remember being really upset by girls and relationships, although when I look back at it, it didn’t mean anything. I was being overdramatic for no reason, but at the time, that’s how I felt, so I won’t discredit bands that have these whiny and overdramatic lyrics, because if people can relate to that, that’s great, but I’m not a kid anymore. I’m not a teenager. I’m looking to settle down with someone and start a family. I’m not someone that wants to play games with me, so these overdramatic and whiny lyrics do nothing for me, but I digress. This hook is great, because it’s something that I can relate to quite well. I was with someone many years ago that was exactly like this. Someone that I couldn’t move on from, and every time I tried, she would weasel her way back into my life. For me, the main draw of this EP are its lyrics, but I have to say that I really enjoy the instrumentation and overall sound, too, since I like this alt-rock sound. It fits them very well, but I wish more people would talk about this band. I know, I’m late to the party by talking about this, and I’ve been meaning to review it, but I’ve been listening to other stuff, so it’s totally slipped my mind, but I wanted to talk about this, because I wanted to pet two kitties with one hand, so to speak. I wanted to talk about my overall thoughts on pop-punk, as a whole, especially since I just stopped listening to the genre, for the most part, and I wanted to talk about this EP. I don’t listen to pop-punk much anymore, especially modern stuff, but Cup Check is one of those bands that does something different, unique, and interesting, so I’ll always check out their material. Continuity is a must-listen for any pop-punk fan, because it’s absolutely fantastic.
The ball ricocheted off the batter’s elbow and shot straight past my catcher’s mitt, crashing right into my cup. The pain was instant and brutal—I dropped to the ground, rolling around clutching my crotch, gasping for air. To make it worse, the fans didn’t offer sympathy—they burst out laughing. I could hear them shouting things like, “You’re supposed to catch balls, not clutch them!” and “Did your cup crack and scramble your eggs?” and “Dumb jock!” As the trainers helped me limp toward the dugout, fans started tossing peanuts at me, yelling, “Here, take some new nuts!” Every step felt more humiliating than the last.
It was opening day, and he'd made the roster as the starting catcher, having invited his parents, siblings, and girlfriend to witness his big moment. Wouldn't you know it, the very first pitch, a 99-mile-an-hour breaking ball, slipped right past the batter and his mitt, landing with a sickening thud directly on his bulging cup. The cup deadened the force, but all that energy was transferred directly into his poor balls. He immediately crumpled over, the game stopped, and the jumbotron began broadcasting the replays. Everyone in the stadium and at home watched over and over in slow motion as the ball made perfect contact with his cup. Online, the jokes were instant and brutal. One viral post read, "Is that a strike or two balls?" Another commented, "He won't need a cup anymore, now that his nuts are smashed into paste." A particularly cruel tweet gained traction: "No more jockstrap needed, frilly panties for this catcher from now on." Even the reporters couldn't resist, their post-game questions all revolving around his poor nuts.
Ouch—turns out there’s nothing “soft” about a softball when it slams straight into the bottom of your cup. I had volunteered to ump the girls' softball tournament since they were short on staff, thinking it’d be a quiet afternoon. I learned otherwise. That ball bounced off the dirt and nailed me right in the cup, pinching my nut that had shifted below the cup. I hobbled through the rest of the game, nursing sore nuts and even sorer pride.
