Discover Top Posts Tagged with #cynnie

12/21–12/22

YULE

#cynnie #ocean #sagittarius birthday #sagittarius #12/21 #12/21/20 #22 #yemaya #dear orisha yemaya #message in a bottle #den #wanna go to the ocean real quick?#LNA #cyn pics #blessed yule #yulemas #yule

update 4/14/2020 4:31 am - 5:03 am

I’m quite self aware

psychosis again

i began self care

this time

I’m experiencing psychosis and this is probably why...

I’ve been taking Ritalin prescribed for ADHD for a couple weeks and it’s been helping me I think with focusing-I might need a dose increase now. In my psychology class we have to research articles relevant to substance use, and I learned amphetamines can induce psychosis as a symptom. Also I’m taking Vraylar again, a new-ish antipsychotic I take at night, because I “forgot” maybe two or three weeks(?) there’s no way to tell time anymore I don’t even know how we’re half way into April I’m still stuck in last month when everything was normal chaotic yet steady routine. Now there is no distraction, I must face what is real and that is my internal thought and when I let it run it goes for miles as I stare out of the window consumed by haunting memories and nightmares. I can’t talk or hold a conversation. I never know what to say cause I have no emerging thoughts so I say nothing or shrug. People must think I’m socially stupid and academically too I can never formulate a coherent thought in class, I try my fucking hardest. I have this theory in psychology that a child who experiences trauma from passed down generational family trauma is implanted with predisposition to being diagnosed with a psychiatric disorder. Sometimes I can’t think more complex than attending to my needs and wants. I try to shower everyday for self care but sometimes that every two or three days. I feel like I have no authentic facial affect or expression. My rooms a fucking mess. I smoke weed multiple times a day. I notice the comorbidity within myself I just had to see it all written down. But I will say that I am doodling and writing and biking and going outside and taking long drives to keep myself entertained and enjoying life Thanks for reading this idk what I’m talking about heh heh.