Head in the Clouds, Gravity Center || Closed
The exact definition of lonely is one without companions or friends. And that was exactly what Daisy used to be; lonely. But now she couldn’t help but feel like everything was the exact opposite. No longer by herself Daisy found herself in a world filled with thousands of things to do, to learn. It was almost overwhelming. She wanted to jump over the edge to the discover what there is that hiding in the deepest of oceans.
Blue sky melted into pink, and hues of orange and red dotted the horizon. Soon the sun had completely vanished and she stood up, brushing the grass of her denim shorts. The sun – she holds the ravishing spot in the center of the universe. A mother planet and a father moon envelope around her. They spin faster and faster; two racing ends to meet in the middle, lace and silk – folded garment to adorn a new creation. It rises out of the coins with alabaster skin, hard and smooth to the touch like porcelain. Blue lips, shuddering fingers – welting tears. Weak eyes it has; ice blue with streaking lines, they are closed to the world. A line of mouth – drawn on with a sharp pointed pen. Daisy was able to see her days coming to an end and it made her trembling. She used to be oh so proud back then. She always knew what would happen next. Now it would rain! Today they won't give us homework at school. Someone is gonna get in trouble today... but lately she felt like the only one getting in trouble is her.
She had nothing to look up for, nothing to inspire to anymore. Her mother was still obsessed with their father and Jesus! Her father is here. She always forgets about her father. A man who intermittently darkens the doorstep is not a figure for whom she desirously painted any pictures of intimacy.
Her father taught her not to cry from a young age, that a lot of bad was going to be done and the only was she’d survive was if she’d be the strong one. “There’s no room for foolish people in this world.” He constantly told her. Yet, that’s what she was. She was a foolish, foolish girl. It only took her three empty cups of tea and two tear-stained eyes to realize it. It had been two weeks, and she could not stop crying. The movement of the tears steaming down her cheeks were engraved into them; the bags under her eyes showed the amount of sleep she had. Her brothers would bring food to her room, a small plate with a sliced apple and a cup of tea per day.
"He touched me Austin! What should I do?"
She would eat to slices and finish off the tea before crying once more.
In the evening, when they’d had their fill of silence, stirred into tea like sugar, he’d begin. His voice launches a thousand ships across the Aegean sea, placating the lashing waves with a “tsss". He erects cities and conjures faces in the span of a sentence, the details hidden in the warp and weft of syllables, and seals fates with the bite of a consonant.
"Why are you hiding in your room?" He would look at her with his blue eyes. "I don't want you to think you have to come out. Mum wouldn't force it."
"I know," she always replied swiftly. He never seemed to care for the tears in her eyes or soggy cheeks. The truth was she knew it, back then she felt like she knew everything. Almost.
"Look, Dai, I'm sorry. I just don't want to see get hurt. There's no place in the world fo-"
"-foolish women. But, you're forgetting that I am not foolish, so will you please leave me alone?" And she would walk to her room, and cry ever more. Why did she have to leave it's comfort.
But now he's back. Everything about him she ever repressed are coming back, too. She was naive to think he would forever stay in the shadows of her mind. She was naive to think otherwise. She was losing it lately, and it's all because of him. She wanted him to decay in the cell forever, she wanted him to disappear! She--
Some prefer wounds to be sealed to skin with kisses; pressed lips against soothed skin. Daisy would cut them out with a knife, if only she might reach the root. But if she ever gets to where he is waiting, she wants to hold his hand tightly and say, like she has never said anything before, ‘I am so sorry.’
