#dan ping

[affection-and-queries]

Liner notes to the “Royal Tenenbaums” soundtrack (Hollywood Records, 2001):

This movie was my third experience with the composer Mark Mothersbaugh and I have come to look forward to this phase of the film-making process very much. Mark works in a large, round, fluorescent green building on Sunset Boulevard which strongly resembles a flying saucer, and he is surrounded by a highly complex staff. Dan Ping manages the finances, and always seems to be just returning from the desert (where she attends rituals of some kind) with a racially new hairstyle. Bob Casale, one of Mark’s Devo colleagues, engineers the recording sessions with the confidence of someone who has had beer bottles thrown at him onstage, and who has thrown them back. There is also Josh, who resembles a young Bob Dylan; Albert, who was married (and divorced) twice to the same girl by age 27; Van, Stacy, Michelle, plus Mark’s restauranteur friend Fred, his girlfriend/agent Anita, and brother Bob, who is usually seen sitting on the curb outside the studio smoking a cigar and reading the business section of the L.A. Times. The operation is known as Mutato Muzika, which I think is Esperanto, and it provides a very stimulating creative atmosphere. Our music supervisor Randy Poster describes Mark’s music as, “charmed, magical and sort of innocent,” and I think that also describes the feeling you get when you work with Mark at his studio. I hope you enjoy the record.

– wes anderson.

[chinatownsisters]

an urgent, though very belated (oops), response to teddy zee

After spending an entire semester in the middle of CT, nowhere calls to me as strongly as New York City.  Especially when I get to dive right into an Asian/Asian American event, the Verizon Asian Pacific American Heritage Month 2011 Conference!  Okay, so this event was totally almost a month ago, and even though I've been meaning with all my heart and will to blog about it, it just hasn't happened until now.  But the reason why I'm still writing about it so long after it's happened is because this is something that's been on my mind.

Verizon APAHM's main event was a panel discussion between four Asian/Asian American professionals who have succeeded and advanced very far in their fields.  Among them was Teddy Zee, a truly admirable person who's served as an executive at both Columbia and Paramount Pictures, despite a humble upbringing.  And even though at this point, I do not have a clear memory of most of the things he said, one thing did really stick to me. 

When asked a question about whether Asian American actors will ever get to play roles other than the stereotypical nerd, sidekick, or foreigner in movies, Zee said something of the measure "The film industry doesn't care about Asian Americans."  He then proceeded to explain that these casting decisions are also weighted with market interests.  For example, in "The Green Hornet," the reason why Jay Chou was cast instead of say, Sung Kang, is because Jay Chou has influence on international Asian markets and Asian consumers, thus generating more moviegoers than Sung Kang would.   However, he later went on to say that directors like Justin Lin, who directed Better Luck Tomorrow, will have the back of Asian Americans and will cast Asian American actors in favorable, stereotype-busting roles.

The reason I am so hung up on this even though it's been almost a month is because I think that is not the message that Asian American youth need to hear and accept right now.  To say that the film industry does not care about Asian Americans and that it's all for the market is like saying that the people behind the market forces do not have agency or liability to make conscious and responsible change.  I wholeheartedly do not believe that that is true at all.  Actually, I hope that if Asian Americans do rise up to such highly esteemed and powerful positions, they would have the interest and goals of creating these opportunities.

Perhaps this sounds like naive and overly optimistic babble, but it's really not.  As youth, we can't  accept that the market is the ruling force; We are so much more powerful and willful than that explanation gives us credit for.  Now, Teddy Zee, the question is: Do YOU care about Asian Americans?  I think that is the more productive question to ask, and looking through Wikipedia, I think you do.  You've spoken at Verizon's APAHM conference and you've produced numerous Asian/Asian American-oriented works.  Maybe Zee didn't mean it the way I've interpreted it, but I can't help but be nervous about the unforgiving frankness of the statement either.

But moving beyond that, all of us, myself included, should ask: Do WE care about Asian Americans?  What will we do?  What opportunities can we create, be it for our Asian/Asian American communities at home and at school or the communities we can build in conjunction with other identity-based and political action-based groups?  We do have agency in the market, but not if we believe that we don't.  Let's start by asking more productive questions and making more productive statements.

And on the real, I can start by not waiting so long to make my response.  

Here's a cool article about how citizens can mobilize against oppressive governments: Russell Pearce, Conservative Champion, Faces Recall in Arizona Let's draw inspiration from this!

[chinatownsisters]

Prep School Negro

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="324" caption="The Prep School Negro: a Documentary Film by André Robert Lee"][/caption] I was fortunate enough to attend a screening of "The Prep School Negro" yesterday, and I have to admit that when I first saw the word "Negro," I thought it had to be a joke because I couldn't process the use of that word in a serious context.  However, I thought more about it, and I realized that it was not an politically-incorrect driven joke, but more of a reflection on the dynamics of race in prep schools (silly me).  This documentary juxtaposes André Robert Lee's, the director, experience as a student of color in a predominantly white prestigious prep school with students of color attending the same school in more recent years, as well as a personal reflection in his adult years through his family and film-making process. Lee grew up in the ghettos of Philadelphia as a black child and was always interested in his academic studies.  His studiousness paid off when he received a full scholarship to attend Germantown Friends School, a prestigious prep school.  Throughout his years there, he often realized that he was the only black person in his classes and at events.  Though he was able to pursue his academic goals more ardently at GFS, he always felt immense guilt because of the growing distance between him and his family.  In fact, he felt a constant tug between being "black" with his family and neighborhood friends and being "white" at school with his teachers and classmates.  This tug drove a wedge between him and his family because of the differences in habits, speech patterns, interests, and desires.  He reflects immensely on the differences in the cultural capital of his white classmates and his black family that immensely influenced his growth as a student and an adult. Lee also comes back to high school where he speaks and interviews other students of color at GFS to talk about their experience as the few faces of color in a predominantly white school, and unsurprisingly, their sentiments are similar, a lack of ability to relate to their white classmates, the confusion about acceptable behavioral patterns that are dictated by racial and class expectations are still present.  The footage revealed students of color considering really interesting questions such as, "Do you feel there are enough black, Hispanic, Asians, and students of color in private/prep schools?" and "Do you feel you are the spokesperson of your race?"  In the film, there are accounts of racist interactions that these students of color have to endure, including being the exotic black guinea pig where white classmates would ask to touch their hair and touch their skin or a case where a black student was ostracized for not being "black enough." The third storyline in this documentary is Lee's attempt to reconnect with his family years after graduation from college and while he was filming.  He captures his mother's and sister's experience and reflections on his attendance at GFS, and his "white-washing" and loss of intimacy and familial connection.  However, the film beautifully portrays the emotional rebuilding of the bridge between Lee and his family, as they talk through differences to come together. This documentary raises really interesting points about the education system for students of color, such as the "burden of being white" that is often felt by students of color when having to adjust to a culturally white academic environment and the hostilities they face at school and at home.  Black students and students of color are always having to reinvent themselves to accommodate to the standard of a seemingly respectable and cultured student.  Students of color are often tokenized and perceived as the "spokesperson" because many of their white classmates have not had much racial exposure elsewhere.  Also, this film raises the issue of the differences in cultural capital between predominantly black public schools and predominantly white private schools, and their different learning environments.  He makes the point that these private schools often support systems for the majority while not providing enough support for the minority.  While white students may feel comfortable and safe in these environments, students of color are constantly undermined by their lesser numbers and cultural differences. This was a really interesting documentary that brought up many interesting points on racial dynamics in educational institutions.  I recommend this documentary immensely!  Here is the link to his website of film screenings, and please try to make one of them! Also, this documentary mentioned the "black table" that was always at school where all the black students always sat together (you know what I'm talking about).  Another really interesting blog post that analyzes and reflects more deeply on this issue of race and space is ChopTensils "Black Frats, Asian-American Student Unions, etc." post.

[chinatownsisters]

Nativism Going Strong in Arizona's Immigration Bill

This past Friday the bill for the "broadest and strictest immigration measure in generations" was signed by Gov. Jan Brewer in Arizona, which will require, not just enable, police officers to stop people in public spaces and demand proof of legal residency based upon reasonable suspicion so to identify, prosecute and deport illegal immigrants.  Immediate and outraged responses protest the inevitable racist targeting of Latin@s, and even "Mexico’s Foreign Ministry said in a statement that it was worried about the rights of its citizens and relations with Arizona."  Here are some other quotations from the article that sticks out in my mind: "It also makes it a state crime — a misdemeanor — to not carry immigration papers. In addition, it allows people to sue local government or agencies if they believe federal or state immigration law is not being enforced." Not only will specific race groups be legally targeted and harassed by police officers, but they can also be charged for something as small as forgetting their papers in the wrong bag or wrong coat.  These misdemeanor charges will then be put on their official records and future potential employers will see this information on background checks, making it harder for these people to get hired for jobs.  What will this do?  Well, it would probably push up crime and incarceration rates for Latin@s, and then perpetrate the system of race and class inequality because let's face it: these police officers will be much less likely to stop a white person for their documentations.  What employers would want to hire people that are "reasonably suspect" of illegal residency because not only would they give their businesses a bad look, but also make them subject to police intervention? "Ms. Brewer acknowledged critics’ concerns, saying she would work to ensure that the police have proper training to carry out the law. But she sided with arguments by the law’s sponsors that it provides an indispensable tool for the police in a border state that is a leading magnet of illegal immigration. She said racial profiling would not be tolerated, adding, 'We have to trust our law enforcement.'" Does this mean that we are living in a world where racism does not exist and that police bureaucracies are not corrupt and subject to racist police brutality?  Because if that's true, I missed that small detail.  But I'm pretty sure we don't live in a colorblind society, and if racial profiling will not be tolerated, then who is this bill really for?  Will equal effort and resources be exerted to check people of all races?  I highly doubt it.  Will white people ever look Mexican? In another New York Times' article on the bill: "In a nearby neighborhood, Ron White, 52, said he felt a sense of relief that something was finally being done about 'the illegals' — whom he blames for ills like congregating on the streets, breaking into homes in his neighborhood, draining tax dollars and taking jobs from Americans. 'I sure hope it does have an effect,' Mr. White said of the new law as he packed his car with groceries. 'I wouldn’t want to show proof of citizenship, but I also don’t feel it is racial profiling. You are going to look different if you are an alien, and cops know.'" I wonder what are his standards of what aliens look like.  Does he mean tiny people with green skin and antennas jumping off spaceships or does he mean people who look and are Mexican?  Also, judging upon looks is very much akin to racial profiling. "Alfredo Hernández-García, 22, who is not a legal resident but is married to a woman who is, already lies low, fearing he will be deported and separated from his wife, who will soon give birth." It's striking to me that U.S. legislators can pass this kind of bill and still vigilantly deny that it will cause any sort of racism and racial profiling.  It reinforces the insistence of this fake colorblind society that we currently live in where this type of legislation will not have racist implications and consequences.  Who are we really kidding?  I think it's more important than ever to realize that colorblindness does not exist and cannot exist because it will only further racism with arguments like "There's no such thing as racism anymore so any reasonable suspicion will be solely based upon justifiable logic." What's also really interesting to me is this sentiment of nativism because I'm pretty sure that the first illegal immigrants in our glorious country were the Pilgrims that landed on Native American shores and appropriated their space.  But this acknowledgement is so often ignored in conventional education, and honestly, for convenience's sake, must be ignored because otherwise everyone living on American soil today would be illegal immigrants.  But that's not the point.  The point is that Americans continuously ignore this piece of history and feel entitled to this space while criminalizing others for wanting the same things. Is the American Dream inherently racist? I also want to acknowledge that in this post I do throw the term "white people" around.  However, this is not to convey anti-white sentiment or to antagonize them, but to express the continuing power dynamic that exists between white people and people of color and the difference in perceptions between the two groups that are supported and enabled by political and social institutions.  But please, let's keep the conversation flowing and tell us what you think!

[chinatownsisters]

Debriefing Baldiness: I did it 'cause I'm a woman!

[caption id="attachment_43" align="alignleft" width="300" caption="In an in-between stage when Sarah's dad's beard trimmer ran out of juice."][/caption] Hello beautiful people! Just going to post a short debrief because I didn't get to go too much into it last time.  The way it happened: I was riding a bus to Philadelphia, and I just couldn't stop thinking about much I wanted to shave it.  Even though I kept thinking of the reasons why I shouldn't shave my head, I couldn't stop wondering what it'd be like.  And that's how I knew I was ready to shave my head, riding a stinky bus to Philadelphia around 10PM and feeling nauseous. I think the biggest realization I made on that bus ride was: The only reason why I'm not shaving my head is because I'm worried about what people will think of me, which makes my hair a social crutch.  If people are going to judge me by my hair, then they are probably people I wouldn't care to be friends with anyway, and if I'm going to feel insecure without having my curtain of hair covering my face, then all the more reason to take this jump.  And most of all, if people are going to think I'm a lesbian or manly or not womanly enough, then they clearly don't know what a woman is.  My hair does not define my womanhood, my personality, or my identity. My friend told me about an English teacher she had who also shaved her hair off.  I'm going to try to recreate the advice that her English teacher told her that she relayed to me:  All beautiful women should shave their hair off, or at least do something to make her not rely on her beauty.  Women don't realize how such a small thing like their hair can affect the way people think of you, interact with you, and how normalcy is so safe. To end this blog post (I know I've been overly repetitive about my baldiness), I'm going to make a confession.  Ever since I've had this haircut, I've never felt so confident or attractive in my life.  It's such a powerful feeling!

[chinatownsisters]

Shaving My Head follow up

HEY GUYS!

As I promised :). Hopefully I'll be able to write more about it soon. But just something to leave you thinking about: I did it because I'm a woman!

Dan Ping

[chinatownsisters]

Shaving My Head

For a few years now, I've been entertaining the idea of shaving my head. I think it all started in my junior year (?) of high school when I jokingly suggested it to my mother. My mother responded by telling me that monks would kidnap me, mistaking me for one of their kind and then dragging me back to their temple. It sounds so silly, and I can hardly imagine my mother truly believing in that, but ever since, I've felt intrigued by the idea. By that time in high school, I've already begun questioning about gender standards and as they are applied to me. The kind of girl who wore loose-fitting t-shirts and shouted "suck my dick" crudely and frequently, I've always garnered comments like, "You are such a man," or "Why aren't you more like a girl?" I usually sport long, long almost waist-length hair and have grown quite comfortable with it, so the idea of shaving my head just squirmed away from me.

Now that I'm college, the idea of shaving my head keeps resurfacing. My friend shaved her head, and I've had conversations with several of my friends that makes me consider it more and more. There are many reasons why girls might want to shave their head: just for the heck of it, their friends are doing it and they think it's cool, it's a politically conscious choice to defy gender norms, or they're doing it because it's suitable to their style and personality. I guess my reasons encompass a little bit of all of those, but more for the sake of wanting to do it for the experience.

I keep saying that I want to shave my head, but a little part of me says that I probably never will. Now, I probably sound like a person who talks the talk, but doesn't walk the walk, which I guess is true in this context. But despite my vacillating desires, I keep feeling like the con's would outweigh the pro's. Somethings that I always worry about if I shave my head are that people would think I'm a lesbian by stereotype, and that everyone would see/treat me differently. Even though the whole point of shaving my head would be to liberate myself from gender stereotypes (not to mention the added plus of shaving off time from my showers), I can't help but think about my mother being angry at me when she sees that I've shaved my head. My mother, who's perpetually concerned with the life of my future marriage, is always urging me to be more lady-like and more man-attracting. So, I'm just thinking that if I shaved my head every time my mother looks at me, she would be a little repulsed and a little disappointed. I'm just thinking that every time I go outside on my campus, people who associate lesbian women with shaved heads will think they already know who I am and what I'm like, and that frustrates me. But at the root of all my hesitation, doubts, and fears is just a personal self-reinforcement of gender stereotypes and gender roles within myself that I always claim I deny. I know I should just do it if I want to, or not just say it at all, but these are just some of the thoughts that I've had recently. If I do decide to shave my head, I'll let y'all know for sure!