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Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)
Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble.
Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo.
Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.
Chapter Word Count: 11k
👉 Warnings: Sexual tension, mutual pining, angst, so much smut (we get a little dom and sub Dieter, intimacy, use of a sex toy, sex acts in public, spanking...really it's all too much to list here - it's Dieter, use your imagination), spicy language, themes dealing with intimate partner violence (not by Dieter), past alcohol abuse, past drug abuse, and shitty parents. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Cat dad / plant dad Dieter comes with his own warnings.
Chapter Quote:
“I mean…I could just go out there, rip my shirt off, and start twerking. What more do they need?”
Kat’s POV
I lay in Dieter’s bed, nuzzling my face deeper into his pillow to inhale his scent. No. A cocktail that was our scent. It was intoxicating, causing fantasies of waking up this way every morning. I couldn’t help allowing my mind to wander there after how the last several days had gone. All of the doubts and fears that had driven me away before were gone now that everything was out in the open. I would need to continue to work on not letting the past dictate the present, but I knew those memories would fade with each passing minute I spent with him. They already were.
I was in love with him. And he was in love with me. I could feel his love in the way he looked at me. Touched me. Cared for me. He didn’t have to say the words, but he did. Often. So did I. Opening myself up to this version of us was making it so much easier for me to move on.
I let out a contented sigh before rolling onto my back, thinking about the newly hung painting in Dieter’s sanctuary and the others sitting along the wall. Given that we had to make up for the few days of rehearsals that we lost, we had been insanely busy or just plain worn out. So, I hadn’t ventured back to the room for a proper look at what he had been up to. The thought made my stomach twist in a nervous flutter. He hadn’t said anything about the paintings. I wasn’t sure if it was something he wanted me to see or not. He had shown the one in his Instagram live, though. As I sat upright, grabbing his green, fluffy robe to cover my naked body, I decided it was fair game.
When I stepped into the hallway, I could hear the clank of pots and pans in the kitchen downstairs and the faint sound of Dieter humming as he made breakfast. I couldn’t help smiling to myself as he fussed at Zee to get off the counter and away from the bacon. I turned, padding toward the end of the hallway past the stacks of books and small jungle of houseplants until I reached the door of my destination.
My fingers hesitated before twisting the knob. My heart pounded in my chest in anticipation of what I would find. After taking a deep breath, I pushed the door open. My eyes were immediately drawn to the painting on the wall from the video. I moved closer, lifting my hand to trail my fingers along the brush strokes on the canvas. The details took my breath away. The shadowing along the contours of muscle. The varying shades of brown in the hair. The tiny smattering of freckles along the shoulders. No details had been overlooked.
I could feel the tears prickling in my eyes as I moved to look at the paintings leaning against the wall. There were several in the same color scheme of red and black. All of me from varying angles. All full of minor details that came with the intimate knowledge of my body. I realized, this is how he saw me. It made my heart feel full. I felt desired. Cherished. Beautiful even. No one had ever made me feel that way.
The tears streamed down my cheeks as I moved to uncover another canvas. This one was different. It was me in a deep purple dress, posed mid dance with a fuchsia background. Something about the color combination seemed familiar. I searched my memory, realizing this was the painting he had been working on before we went to New York. He really had been sweet on me from the start.
I huffed out a laugh, uncovering another painting of me in bed. I was nestled in the white bedding with bare back exposed, hair fanned out with golden strands glinting in the sunlight. It all somehow made me fall for him all over again. Even harder, if that were possible.
“I told you I had new inspiration,” Dieter called from the doorway in that low raspy tone that made me ache for him.
I turned toward him with a smile. “I can’t believe you’ve done all of these. Of me?”
He nodded, closing the distance between us. I couldn’t help admiring his lean body, only covered in gym shorts, as he approached. His hands rested on my hips, pulling me in a little closer. “I wondered when you would ask about these. I know you noticed them.”
I shrugged. “Last week was a little insane trying to catch up on missed time. I had to put it out of my mind and focus.”
I glanced over at the paintings again, chewing my bottom lip before he reached up to wipe the tear streaks from my cheeks.
“Why did you paint so many?” I asked.
It was his turn to shrug. “I missed you when I wasn’t with you. It was the only way I could get you out of my head.”
My fingers traced along the stubble of his jaw. “You’re ridiculous.”
He chuckled. Then he shifted away to reach into the pocket of his shorts, pulling out a silver key. “Speaking of ridiculous… I don’t want you climbing the fence and falling on your ass again. So, I want you to have this.”
I laughed, watery-eyed. “You’re giving me a house key?”
“Kit-Kat, you already own me. You might as well have a key to my house. Hell, you could move in right now…”
His words trailed off as he grimaced. “If you wanted to, I mean. When you’re ready. There’s absolutely no pressure to do that. I was just sayin…”
My heart wanted to explode. He was too damn cute. I could tell he was worried that he said something out of line. My face softened as I peered up at him with a small smile, rubbing at the soft spot behind his ear - because I knew it would relax him.
“It’s Ok. I don’t feel any pressure. Besides, I’m not entirely opposed to the idea. We should probably give it a little time, though…”
His eyes lit up at the prospect. He reached to brush a strand of hair away from my face. I could tell, this made him feel more confident to continue.
“If you would prefer it, we could buy a new place together. It doesn’t have to be here. And I wouldn’t be offended if you kept your house either. I don’t ever want you to feel like you’re stuck with me.”
He was making my insides melt. He understood me too well. If I had no impulse control, I’d move in before the day was over. I had never, once, wanted to live with Alec in all the years we were together. And here I was ready to combine my life with Dieter’s. Completely. The hold this man had on me was insane, and I don’t even think he realized it.
My smile widened as my eyes roamed his face. “I would never dream of making you move all these plants to another house. It would be a nightmare.”
He snorted out a laugh before closing the short distance between us, placing a soft kiss on my lips. “We'd better get going or else we’re gonna be late for our production meeting.”
I groaned. “I’m so over these. At least there are only two left. I’m not sure how much more I can take.”
He smiled. “Bold of you to assume we’ll be on the show next week.”
My eyes narrowed on his. “Bold of you to assume we won’t be.”
He chuckled as he wrapped his arm around me. “Come on. Let’s go eat breakfast before Zee figures out how to open the microwave door to get to the bacon.”
A short time later, we found ourselves sitting across the table from our two favorite people, Stacia and Joe. They seemed to be in a better mood than they were the previous week when I had shown up alone. I assumed it was because they got their fan favorites back on top.
“I’m happy to see that you two performed much better yesterday. Can we assume that whatever issue you two were having is resolved?” Stacia asked.
Dieter’s jaw tensed before he opened his mouth to speak. I squeezed his knee under the conference table to stop him. He hadn’t been here last week to know what I told them. It was better if he didn’t say anything.
I cut him off. “I told you, we had an off week. We’re tired and grumpy. It’s not that deep.”
Even though I knew that Lana had most likely shared some of what happened with them, I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of filling in any details. As far as I was concerned, it was none of their damn business.
Stacia gave me a knowing smile but reluctantly changed the subject. Joe sat smirking as he looked between Dieter and me.
Stacia huffed out a laugh. “Well, final four. I’ll admit, I didn’t think you two would be here when this season started…but here we are.”
Neither Dieter nor I looked amused by that statement. She wasn’t wrong, though. Before the first rehearsal, I was sure we wouldn’t make it past week two.
Stacia continued, “I’ll be honest, the competition is pretty tight right now. There’s no more room for error if you want to win. You two need to keep that in mind.”
We both gave her a tight smile in acknowledgment.
She cleared her throat. “OK. Well, if you two have nothing to discuss, we’ll get to it…”
We stared at her, blinking. It was almost comical how in sync we had become in every way.
She sighed. “Alright…so, it’s gonna be Samba week for you two. Since we are down to a handful of couples, we’re gonna give you an option for song choices this week.”
That news seemed to perk Dieter up a bit. I know how much he hates not having a say in anything.
Joe leaned forward, “You can do either Whenever, Wherever to keep it more Latin-based, or…change it up and do Shake Ya Ass to add a little hip-hop flare to it.”
I chuckled. I already knew what Dieter wanted. His head swiveled toward me, his eyes bright with excitement as a smile spread across his face. “Do you have a preference?” he asked.
I didn’t bother to answer, turning back toward Stacia and Joe. “We’ll do Shake Ya Ass.”
Dieter snorted out a laugh, knowing we were running on the same brainwaves.
Joe looked pleased with the choice. Stacia didn’t seem to care either way.
“Alright. We’ll get the track sent over. Here are your costume sketches,” Stacia said, sliding the drawings over. It was going to be a revealing metallic gold fringe for me and black pants with a metallic gold button-up top for Dieter. We both nodded in approval, ready to be on our way.
Stacia looked like she wanted to say more, but Joe cut her off by ending the meeting with a smile. We wasted no time getting out of there. I didn’t want to allow Stacia to pry any more than she already had.
After the meeting, we found ourselves at the rehearsal studio. Dieter was sprawled on the floor in that way he does, somehow making it look both ridiculous and sexy. His eyes followed me as I paced the room, trying to figure out the best way to mix hip-hop with a samba.
Dieter’s voice cut through my thoughts. “I mean…I could just go out there, rip my shirt off, and start twerking. What more do they need?”
I snorted out a laugh, pausing in my tracks to look at him. He was giving me a cheesy grin, the kind that made his eyes crinkle. It was distracting. I almost forgot what I was supposed to be doing. Almost.
“OK, regardless…you need to learn the basics. We’ll start with that, then build off it. So, get your ass up. I’ll show you how to make it bounce the right way.”
He wallowed around, finally getting to his feet with a groan. “So, you’re gonna demonstrate the bouncing, correct?”
I rolled my eyes, but I couldn’t hide my smile. “Focus, please.”
He sighed. “Fine. Show me how to samba.”
I smiled, switching into teacher mode. “As you know, the samba is a Latin dance. However, it’s a little different. It has this rhythmic energy and bounce to it that the other Latin dances don't.”
His toothy grin was back. “Good. I like it when you rhythmically bounce against me. I particularly like it when you do it on top of me.”
I bit back a laugh. “You’re not going to make this easy for me today, are you?”
“I’m sorry. I’ll behave…to the best of my ability.”
“And you’re full of shit, but I digress. Anyway, unlike the jive or quickstep, samba keeps you low. Knees soft, pelvis neutral, and feet moving.”
I moved to stand in front of him, demonstrating as I explained the steps. “You're going to do a forward step with the left foot, a partial weight transfer, then a quick back step with the right. Then your knees are gonna flex, then straighten in a smooth, rhythmic bounce.”
Dieter tried to mimic the movements, but his bounce was stiff.
I chuckled, moving to correct him. “It’s not a jump. It’s a compression. Like you’re absorbing the beat through your legs.”
I sidestepped to get behind him and placed my hands on his hips. “Relax here. Let your pelvis move with the bounce, but don’t overdo it. You’re not hula dancing.”
He laughed, but the sound trailed off as I pressed closer against him. I couldn’t help myself. Suddenly, the studio felt ten degrees hotter. Even though it was obvious the contact excited him, he tried to remain focused.
“Okay,” he said, voice a little hoarse. “So, I bounce, but I don’t bounce too much.”
“Exactly. Now let’s add the voltas.”
“The what?”
“Voltas. It’s a traveling step with a twist. You cross one foot over the other and rotate your hips. I don’t think you’ll have any issues with that part.”
I gave him a cheeky smile, causing him to narrow his eyes. I needed to behave, too.
After that, we went through the cruzado walks, the samba walks, the whisk steps, and the botafogos. As usual, he was catching on quickly. His body was moving with much better precision than it was when we first started. Though I still had to correct his frame and make adjustments to his timing.
We moved into trying a short sequence - samba walks into a volta, then a stationary samba with a body roll. He nailed the timing but missed the bounce.
I tutted at him, taking a moment to tease him about it. But then we were all business.
“Again. Focus on me. Match what I’m doing."
He shook his body to loosen up as I started the music again. Our eyes locked as we moved into our positions. This time, Dieter moved with me. Our bodies found a shared rhythm, pulsing as one. His bounce softened and his body twisted with mine, perfectly in sync. It was effortless, a connection born from our nights tangled in sheets and from endless shared laughter.
I couldn’t help myself, slowly grinding against him more than necessary. Teasing. He caught on instantly, matching my movements with a wink and roll of his infamous hips.
“You trying to start something?” he asks, voice husky.
My fingers brushed along his jaw, causing him to lean into my touch with a smile. “Trying? I’m pretty sure you already did.”
His hand slid to the small of my back, pulling me closer. “You knew what you were getting into.”
My nose nuzzled against his. “Oh, I did. Loose hips, dirty jokes, and a face that makes me forget what planet I’m on.”
He leaned in, our foreheads pressing together. “You forget what planet you’re on?”
“I do when you look at me like that.”
Dieter’s hand moved to my waist. “I think we should go through that combo one more time…”
I smiled at him. He was such a mischievous little shit.
He guided me through the motions, causing my body to melt into his. This time it was less about technique and more about feeling. Our trust in each other and the heat blazing between us. His fingers slid along my body, causing my breath to hitch. His eyes were dark. Hungry. It made me ache for him. Our rehearsal was quickly turning into something else entirely.
“I do believe you’re trying your best to seduce me, Mr. Bravo.”
He chuckled, deep and low in his chest. “There is no trying. I’m pretty sure it’s working.”
We laughed, continuing to dance like no one was watching. We were past caring anymore. Every touch was a promise. Every nose graze, a declaration. And when the music faded, we were still moving. Still laughing. Still completely wrapped up in each other.
Though the sensual vibes between us continued through the rest of our rehearsal, it didn’t do much to help my aching body. Especially after we got into planning the choreography, trying to give the samba a hip-hop flair on top of everything else. I found myself silently hoping that the non-stop dancing for the last 10 weeks wasn’t finally catching up with me. It had been years since I danced this much for this duration of time, having never made it this far into the competition.
By Thursday, it was clear the arthritic pain I felt in my feet, knees, and hips was not going away without a fight. My body wasn’t getting enough recovery time. It didn’t matter what measures I took; it was listlessly waving a white flag and begging for reprieve.
Dieter was making it his personal mission to take care of me, making sure I took it easy during rehearsals. He would take instructions, dancing with an invisible partner while I sat nearby watching. I would join him off and on throughout, just so he could get a few proper run-throughs. It wasn’t ideal, but he was making it work. It helped that he was an excellent student, which took some of the pressure off me.
When we weren’t rehearsing, he forced me to rest. He would run hot baths, cook, make his herbal tea concoctions, and give me massages - all without me having to ask. And he didn’t complain once. In fact, he seemed to enjoy it. No one had ever taken care of me like he did. It made my heart swell with gratitude, making me fall even harder for him.
All of his efforts were enough to take the edge off, but by the end of each day, I felt like I had been hit by a dump truck. We only had one more week to get through after this one. I was determined to push through it, but a small part of me was worried my body wouldn’t let me.
Dieter’s POV
On Friday, I was awake with the sunrise. Not wanting to disturb Kat, I decided to start my day early. I got up and made us a hearty breakfast, fed Zee, and tended to my plants until it was time for me to get ready for my therapist appointment. After showering, I walked into the bedroom, tugging a t-shirt over my head. I paused at the foot of the bed, brushing my damp hair away from my eyes as I watched Kat sleep. Zee was sprawled out next to her, content with a full belly. It was a sight that I still wasn’t used to, but I loved everything about it. Kat belonged here with us. She made our little family complete.
A breathy sigh escaped my lips. Even in sleep, she had that kind of effect on me, making my heart swell with the insane amount of happiness I was feeling. My life finally felt like it was on the right path. She was the last missing piece to get me there.
I walked around to her side of the bed, brushing dark strands away from her face. She hummed quietly, smiling as she grabbed my hand and pulled me down next to her.
I chuckled. “Kitten, I can’t come back to bed. I’ve gotta leave. I have that appointment with my therapist. Remember?”
Her eyes fluttered open, then she pouted. I laughed, leaning in to kiss the pout away.
“I made you breakfast. It’s in the microwave. Zee already ate. So, don’t listen to her bullshit. I’ll see you at the rehearsal studio this afternoon, yeah?”
She nodded, her eyes roaming my face as she scratched along the scruff of my chin.
I smiled. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
It was her turn to smile. “Because I love you.”
Hearing her say those words still made my heart flutter in my chest. It was a rush, better than any drug. I rubbed along her ribs, smiling wider. “I love you too.”
She tugged me closer, kissing me. It was slow. Sensual. It told a story of everything she wanted to do to me at that moment.
I pulled away with a chuckle, determined not to give in. “Take it easy at the professional’s rehearsal, ok? Make sure you tell Mark what’s going on so he’s not going full steam. And don’t push yourself too hard. We have filming later. You’ve got a long day.”
She rolled her eyes, laughing under her breath. “Yes, sir. I’ll do as I’m told.”
Her sultry morning voice saying those words caused a twinge in my groin. Little Bravo was officially awake.
My eyes narrowed as my lips set into a tight line. She knew what she was doing. My hand moved lower, grabbing a handful of her ass.
“Alright. I’m going before you make me forget I have somewhere to be.”
Her tinkling laugh was the last thing I heard as I walked out the door.
A short time later, I found myself sitting across from Dr. Smith. I had a dopey smile on my face, thinking about how amazing things had been with Kat since we made up after our little bump in the road. Dr. Smith was eyeing me suspiciously as she got situated for our session.
“Based on your good mood and how well you and Kat did on the show this week, I’m going to assume you’ve made up?”
My smile widened. “We have. We talked. She finally opened up to me about how she was feeling.”
I paused, rubbing at the tops of my thighs as I tried to hold back some of the excitement.
“She told me she loves me. I think we’ve said it fifteen times a day since then.”
Dr. Smith smiled. “Well, that is good news. I’m happy to hear everything has sorted itself out. How are things progressing now that you’ve had the talk?”
I shrugged. “I mean, she still wants to take things slow. We’re trying not to rush it…and I think that’s important. Being impulsive never did me any favors. It’s hard for me to hold back, but I know she needs the time.”
“I’m glad to hear you say that. You may not realize it, but that’s a big deal for you. That kind of growth is important for your recovery.”
Her praise made my chest tighten. I really had come a long way. I actually felt kind of proud of myself.
“How are things going with the show? Any more issues with her ex?” she asked.
I stretched my legs out, tapping my fingers on my knee as I shook my head.
“No, nothing from him lately. I do worry about Kat overdoing it, though. All these rehearsals are wearing us both down, but especially her. She’s been having a lot of aches and pains from it. She’s hurting, but she won’t slow down.”
“And how do you feel about that?”
“I feel like I wanna wrap her in bubble wrap and hide her away from it all. Make her spend some time resting so she doesn't hurt herself.”
Dr. Smith smiled. “You’re protective.”
I huffed out a laugh. “Yeah, I suppose I am. I guess that’s what love does to me. I just want her to be healthy and happy.”
It was a short session, mostly just a check-in to see how I was doing after everything happened with Kat. Luckily, I left on a good note this week. Dr. Smith seemed pleased with how I was handling things. Emotionally, I was in a good place. And that’s where I wanted to stay.
I went back home after that. Kat had already left for the professional’s dance rehearsal, which gave me the house to myself. I took the opportunity to check in with my agent, Lenny. He had been pushing to find my next gig since the dance competition would be over soon. He was getting a lot of positive feedback, but there was nothing concrete yet. He hinted that there were a couple of things he had a good feeling about, but wouldn’t say more. By the time I disconnected from the call with him, I was feeling hopeful that my career might actually be on the upswing. My hard work was being noticed and was finally paying off.
The next few hours were spent trying to make a homemade spinach pie. I thought it might be a fun surprise for Kat after the long day I knew she was having. It turned out to be a lengthy and tiring process, layering the delicate phyllo sheets with butter to make the flaky pastry-like crust. It was a new experience, but I eventually perfected the technique well enough to keep the sheets intact.
For the filling, I sauteed and mixed all the usual ingredients - spinach, fetta, eggs, onions, garlic, and dill. I went against the recipe I found online and added ricotta and parmesan since Kat mentioned her Yaya’s had been creamier than what we had at the Greek cafe, and was possibly mixed with another type of cheese. It was a shot in the dark, but it was a start.
While it was baking, I whipped up some homemade tzatziki for dipping and prepped the lemon chicken. I would finish cooking that and the roasted potatoes when we got home later.
Zee, of course, made her presence known when the chicken came out, chittering at me and rubbing against my legs. I had to run her off the counter several times before she finally gave up, climbing to the top of her cat tree to give me a sassy side eye until I was done.
The pie was ready just in time before I had to leave. It smelled amazing. I could only hope it would taste as good as it smelled as I put everything away to leave for rehearsal.
The rehearsal studio was bustling with activity as the crew got set up for filming. Sunlight streamed through the high windows, casting a golden glow around Kat. She was sitting on the polished wood floor, stretching her calves with a resistance band. She smiled at me as I approached, but it didn’t reach her eyes. I could tell she was already tired.
I sat down on the floor, going through my extensive stretching routine as I eyed her.
“You OK?” I asked in a low voice.
She nodded. “Yeah, just a little achy. I took some pain relievers. Hopefully they’ll kick in soon.”
I sighed, hating that she was putting herself through this. Something told me it was worse than she let on.
Minutes later, the cameras started rolling. We were on our best behavior as we worked through the rhythm, the footwork, and transitions. Kat’s movements were fluid, but her steps slowed. She winced between counts, her hand drifting to her hip more often as she shifted the weight back and forth on her feet.
“I think I need a short break,” I announced, about three hours into it. It was more for her than me.
Kat looked almost relieved, sinking onto the nearest chair with her water in hand. I drew it out, asking questions about the steps that I already knew the answers to. I even threw in a few self-deprecating jokes for the cameras. The break couldn’t last, though. However, it seemed to be enough of a reprieve to finish out filming.
We still had two hours of rehearsal time after the film crew left, but I felt like we were in a good spot. It didn’t take much for us to get a routine down these days since we were so in tune with each other. So, I insisted we bow out early. Surprisingly, Kat didn’t need much convincing. She folded almost immediately. All it took was a promise of a hot bath and one of my special foot massages. She was packed up and ready to go within minutes.
After spending enough time in the tub with Kat to get properly pruney and relaxed, I went downstairs to finish up with dinner. She followed soon after, lying on the couch while keeping Zee entertained and out of my way.
Minutes after I put the spinach pie in the oven to heat up, Kat’s head popped around the corner.
“What are you baking? That smells amazing.”
I laughed. “It’s funny you should ask. It’s a surprise.”
Her lips pursed as she ambled toward me. She stopped in front of me, her eyes searching mine for an answer.
“Soooo, are you gonna elaborate on that?” she finally asked.
I laughed. “No. I’m gonna make you wait until it's ready. It’s almost done. Go have a seat. I’ll make you a plate.”
She huffed. “I’m perfectly capable…”
I held up a finger. “NO. Shush. Stop. Go sit. I want you off your feet.”
She rolled her eyes, huffing out a laugh as she went to sit down.
Minutes later, I set a full plate down in front of her along with a side salad. Her eyes rounded, zeroing in on her favorite dish.
“Dieter…did you…Did you make spanakopita for me?”
I sat down next to her, smiling like a kid who was proud of his art project. She looked up at me, a little misty-eyed.
“Nobody has ever made this for me. I mean, aside from my mom and Yaya.”
My smile softened. “I mean, it probably won’t be as good as theirs. But I did try to make it like you said…with a creamier filling. I can’t attest to the taste, though.”
She picked up her fork and dug in, humming in delight as she chewed.
“I’m almost afraid to ask…but how does it measure up?”
She shoved another forkful in her mouth.
“It’s so fucking good. Better than the cafe we go to. It’s actually very close. The texture is there. The flavor is close…”
I gave her a toothy grin. “Yeah? What’s missing then?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s not as sweet, maybe? Still amazing though.”
She arranged her plate just right, then reached for her phone.
I chuckled. “What are you doing?”
“Documenting. But also…I’m sending this to Lydia. I need to rub it in.”
As soon as Kat set her phone down, it started ringing. She snorted out a laugh, trying to contain herself as she answered on speaker phone.
“Well, hello, dear sister. How kind of you to interrupt my delicious homemade dinner.”
“That man seriously made all that for you? I’m gonna come steal him away. I’m not opposed to polygamy. I’m sure Dieter wouldn’t mind having a brother-husband, would he?”
I burst into laughter. She sounded so serious. Once I got myself under control, I answered her.
“I’m sorry, Lydia, but I’m a one-woman kind of man, and that woman is your sister. If I’m gonna have a brother-husband, it will be at her bidding.”
Kat's eyes widened, surprised by my comment.
“Not that I want to share you. I’d rather not. I’m kind of stingy with my Kit-Kats,” I added.
She chuckled, shaking her head as she turned her attention back to the phone.
“Lyd, this almost tastes like Yaya’s spanakopita. It’s amazing.”
“Ugh, I’m so jealous right now. I haven’t had that in ages.”
I cleared my throat. “I don’t mean to butt in, but Lydia, do you happen to know the recipe your Yaya used?”
She was quiet for a beat. “Hmmm. Not off the top of my head…what all ingredients did you use? Maybe it will jog my memory.”
I rattled off everything and told her how I made it.
“Well, I know she definitely used mozzarella in the filling…and maybe fennel leaves?”
My eyes sparked with excitement. “That’s it. The fennel leaves would make it sweet. I’ll add those two things next time.”
Kat’s bare foot rubbed along mine under the table. Her eyes were bright as she smiled at me. The prospect of there being a next time seemed to excite her in more ways than one.
Lydia’s voice broke through the moment. “Speaking of next time…Assuming you guys make it through to finals…. I was thinking of coming for a visit to see the show. It’s Kat’s last season, and the finals are kind of a big deal. And it would be a good time for more spanakopita...”
Kat’s face lit up. “Really? Lyd, don’t mess with me.”
A muffled laugh sounded through the speaker. “Yeah. I mean, if Dieter doesn’t mind sharing you…Or you don’t mind sharing, Dieter. Because I feel like I need to spend some time with him, too.”
Kat chuckled. “I suppose I’ll let him share his time with you. But nothing else. The rest is mine.”
“Ugh, you two are disgustingly adorable. I’m not sure if I can handle it.”
I couldn't help the smile plastered on my face. She wanted me to meet her family. This was a first for me. I was both excited and nervous.
“Well, I’ll let you two get back to dinner. I’ll touch base with the plans next week.”
As Kat ended the call, I felt a sudden wave of anxiety hit me. She noticed immediately.
“Why are you making that face?” she asked.
“Umm…I dunno. I guess the thought of meeting your family is making me a little nervous.”
She smiled. “Dieter, come on. She already loves you. You’re fine.”
My stomach twisted. “Does she know about my past though?”
Her face softened. “That’s what you’re worried about? Yes. She knows. She’s not judgmental. She believes people can change. She’s been your cheerleader this entire time. I promise, it will be OK.”
That helped me relax a little. It was my past that tended to turn people against me. The thought of having to explain that to someone as important as Lydia, made my heart race. And not in a good way.
After dinner, we crawled into bed, deciding to relax and watch TV until we couldn’t keep our eyes open any longer. That lasted for all of twenty minutes before we were making out like a couple of teenagers. It didn’t progress past that though. I didn’t feel the need to make every intimate moment about sex. Sometimes being wrapped up with her was enough, having the same effect on my central nervous system. I also wanted her to rest. She definitely wouldn’t be doing that if I let her get going. The girl really was insatiable sometimes.
Saturday and Sunday went by in a blur of spotty rehearsal times, a photo shoot for the finale, and spray tans. Kat was putting on a solid front, but I could tell the pain was getting worse. Particularly when she put on a pair of heels. Her gait was off, like she was unnaturally shifting her weight.
When show day rolled around, she was quiet most of the morning. Her energy was low, but she claimed she was just trying to reserve some of it for the live performance. Which, I totally understood. I felt like I was running on fumes myself.
We went through our morning routine - showing up early for camera blocking, then costume fittings, and hair and makeup. There was nothing out of the ordinary. Until dress rehearsal.
I sat in a front row seat of the ballroom, watching the professionals rehearse their group performances and do some pre-taping for the show. Kat seemed to be doing well with the performance; she and Mark were the standouts of the group, like always.
They were on the third run through of the performance when everything went to hell. Mark and Kat did a small lift, nothing crazy. Kat was meant to spin outward after he set her back down. She was mid-turn when her ankle gave out, rolling in what looked to be a very painful way before she crumpled. Mark managed to catch her on the way down, gently setting her on the wooden floor.
My body moved before my mind really had time to register what was happening. I shoved two or three people out of the way to get to her. She sat, holding her ankle, waving people off. Her face was tense. I could tell she was trying to brush it off, like it was no big deal. Everyone crowded around her. It was smothering and pissing me off.
“Can’t you guys give her some space? Fuck off somewhere,” I yelled out of frustration.
Mark and I stayed with her as everyone scattered.
Her teeth were clenched as she spoke. “It’s fine. I just need a minute.”
“What happened?” I asked.
She sighed. “These fucking heels are killing me. My left foot is throbbing. I guess I was trying to overcompensate and shift my weight too much.”
Stacia and Joe appeared out of nowhere, kneeling beside her.
“I’ve got medical coming to take a look at it,” Joe said.
Stacia sighed. “I guess we need to make a contingency plan if she can’t continue.”
“I can dance. It’s fine. I just need a minute.”
Her tone was more forceful now. I didn’t think she was willing to accept any other outcome. And I hate to admit it, but I didn’t trust her judgment.
“I don’t want another partner. If she can’t dance, then I’m out.”
Everyone's eyes turned to me. Shocked.
“Dieter, you ha…” Stacia started.
I shook my head. “No. There’s no way I can learn to work with a new partner that quickly. I’ll be at a disadvantage. I’m fine with not finishing.”
“I need you all to shut the fuck up. I’m sitting right here. I told you, I’m fine. I can finish this out.”
I sighed. “Honey, don’t push yourself because of me. I’m serious.”
She shook her head. “It’s not just because of you. I want to finish. And I’m going to.”
She moved to stand against our protests. I stood with her, allowing her to hold on to me for support. I couldn’t bear watching her hobble along, so I scooped her up in my arms and carried her over to a chair. She didn’t protest, melting against me almost immediately.
A few minutes later, a couple of the medical team members came to examine her ankle. Stacia and Joe were nearby, anxiously awaiting the verdict.
I watched as one of the medics flexed her foot and felt around on it, asking her if anything hurt as they did so. It was quick and didn’t seem very thorough. It didn’t sit right with me.
He stood, removing his rubber gloves. “Well, everything seems stable, and she has a good range of motion. I don’t think it’s sprained or anything is broken, but it might do her some good to stay off of it for a day or so.”
Kat huffed beside me. “Can I at least perform with Dieter tonight?”
He shrugged. “You risk making it worse, but nothing is keeping you from it.”
This fucking guy. I had zero confidence in him.
Stacia and Joe were back, having overheard the medic.
Joe sat beside Kat. “Kat, I’m not sure if I’m comfortable letting you perform tonight.”
“Just the one performance. Three minutes of dancing. We don’t need a dress rehearsal or anything. I’ll stay off of it until then.”
Joe looked at Stacia as she paced, rubbing at the crease between her brows.
“We can have someone fill in with Mark. If Kat thinks they can get by without a final dress rehearsal, then I’m willing to let them try it.”
Of course, Stacia wants Kat to perform. We’re her money makers. Joe’s jaw clenched. He was obviously more worried about safety, but he caved.
“Alright. Fine. But I want her to sign a waiver. If this ends badly, it’s on her.”
“I’ll sign whatever. It’s fine.”
I wanted to protest, but I felt like I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Kat had many reasons for wanting to continue. I knew that. But I could easily put an end to this by refusing to perform.
After we were finally left alone, I offered up the only thing that would make me feel better about this.
“I’m gonna call my doctor to come in and have a look at this. I don’t trust that guy’s judgment.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Dieter, I told you. It will be ok. I’m fine.”
My shoulders sagged. “Humor me. Please? It would make me feel better.”
She deflated. “Fine. But I’m performing, no matter what he says.”
I shook my head. “You’re too damn stubborn. You know that?”
“Trust me, I know. Now. Take me to your dressing room, please. I’m tired of people staring at us.”
I chuckled. “So bossy. Geez. OK.”
I carried her back to my dressing room, getting her settled on the small plushy chair in the corner. Then I stepped out to call Dr. Tabor, begging him to drop everything to come here and check on Kat. He said he couldn’t at first, but then I offered to pay double. Funny how money can change minds.
After filling the doctor in on everything, I came back to the dressing room. Evan had arrived with lunch. Kat was still waving off the injury as I explained what happened, but Evan could see I was worried.
“You know…I could call in your physio guy to tape her up for the performance. Assuming the doctor gives the all clear. It might help with some of the pain and help prevent any further issues,” he said.
I nodded. “That’s not a bad idea. I knew you were good for something.”
“Fucking hell, you two. I’m not a delicate flower.”
I chuckled. “We’re not saying you are. I just wanna prevent you from getting hurt any worse. We still have another week of this shit to get through.”
She tilted her head, thinking about it. “Alright. Fair point.”
Relief washed through me. I was just happy she wasn’t going to argue about that, too.
A short time later, I got the call that Dr. Tabor was at the studio entrance, so I sent Evan out to get him. The doctor got to work immediately and was very thorough with his exam. Much more so than the medic who had checked Kat’s ankle earlier. I don’t think I have ever felt so grateful for a doctor in my life.
“You’ve definitely got some inflammation, but I don’t believe it’s all from rolling the ankle. I think for the time being, we can do a course of corticosteroids to get you through the next week. You’ll need to ice that ankle for about fifteen minutes, a few times a day. And I want you to stay off your feet as much as possible. Rest and keep your legs elevated. If you’ve got some compression socks, wear those. It might not hurt to ice them, too. ”
Evan stood next to me, diligently typing notes into his phone. He seemed to be taking this just as seriously as I was.
“So, her ankle is ok then?” I asked.
The doctor nodded. “There’s no obvious signs of injury, but it might not hurt to get her in for an MRI and x-ray just to be sure.”
He turned back to Kat with a serious expression.
“If you still insist on dancing tonight, I would like you to stabilize the ankle. I know you can’t dance in a boot but at least get it taped up. And get some crutches. I don’t want you using it at all until you have to.”
Kat nodded, a small smile of victory on her face.
Dr. Tabor dug around in his bag, pulling out a prescription pad. After he jotted down what Kat needed, I sent Evan off to the pharmacy to pick it up for her.
I must have said thank you a hundred times before Dr. Tabor walked out the door. The way I saw it, he had literally saved the day.
“If Evan gets back soon, maybe you’ll have time for the meds to kick in before the show.”
She adjusted in her seat, grimacing slightly. “Yeah. Maybe.”
I grabbed a folding chair from the corner and set it in front of her. After rolling up a towel for a cushion, I pointed at it. “Elevate, please.”
She smiled. “You’re entirely too good to me.”
I shrugged. “I care. This is what people do when they care.”
The sound of low grumbling, shuffling feet, and rattling bags in the hallway caught my attention. I poked my head out, finding Evan struggling to carry the copious amounts of shit he bought. I stepped out, taking a small cooler from him.
“What the hell is this?”
“Ice. I bought ice packs, but they’re not cold yet.”
I grabbed the crutches tucked under his arm, then followed him into the room. Kat’s eyes widened when she saw the sheer amount of stuff he had.
“Evan…what the fuck?” she huffed.
He waved her off. “I was just making sure I had everything covered. I got you some ice, extra towels, and Ziplock bags for said ice, and crutches. Oh, and compression socks. I wasn’t sure if you had any of those…”
He paused his rambling as he dug through a plastic bag.
“Here’s your prescription. And I got you some more NSAIDS, just in case. OH! And…”
He rummaged around again. Pulling out something else.
“I got some Kit Kats for the boss man because he needs to calm the fuck down…and those dark chocolate things that you like, Kat.”
He handed her a handful of individually wrapped dark chocolate truffles. Then tossed a king-sized Kit Kat at me without warning. I caught it against my chest.
Evan busied himself with putting ice in a Ziplock bag and wrapping it in a towel. I added a few additional towels under Kat’s feet to elevate them a little more.
Kat started giggling as she shoved a chocolate in her mouth. “I’m gonna need both of you to calm the fuck down. This is getting ridiculous.”
Evan opened his mouth to speak but snapped it shut when his phone dinged. He glanced at it.
“Ahh. Stuart’s here.”
Kat’s brows furrowed. “Who’s that?”
Evan and I both said, “The physio guy,” in unison.
Kat snorted out a laugh. “I kind of feel like I’m in the twilight zone right now.”
Evan laughed before leaving the room to go get Stuart.
Kat sighed. “Well, this wasn’t how I saw the day going…”
“Yeah, me either. Can I get you anything else?”
She shook her head. “No. You two are spoiling me enough.”
Evan reappeared, with Stuart in tow. After introductions, he got to work. Questioning Kat about her pain and location. He was focused, feeling along her muscles and tendons as he decided the best way to apply the flesh colored tape for her specific issues. He didn’t stop with just her ankle; he did it all - feet, ankles, knees, and hips.
“So, what exactly does this do again?” I asked curiously.
Stuart stayed focused, taping up Kat’s hip.
“It does several things. It gives extra support to the muscles and stabilizes joints…stimulates the nerve endings. And the best part, it promotes healing by lifting the skin, allowing for lymphatic drainage and better blood circulation. All without limiting the range of movement.”
Kat laughed quietly. “That all may be true. But I’m beginning to feel like a mummy wrapped in packaging tape.”
I couldn’t help myself. “Don’t worry, honey, I’ll happily help unwrap you after the show.”
Kat’s eyes widened as she held back a laugh. Evan and Stuart snorted, not at all surprised by my mouth.
Stuart laughed it off, pretending I hadn’t said a word. “You may feel that way now, but trust me, you’ll be thanking me for it later.”
He stood, packing up his supplies.
“It would probably be best if you continue this through next week with the intensity of your rehearsals. Give my office a call in the morning to get you guys on the schedule. I’ll send someone out for you. Or if you prefer, we can have a little training session when we have more time, and I can show you how to apply it correctly. It might not hurt to schedule some electrotherapy appointments, too.”
Kat and I both nodded, then thanked him as he took his leave. Evan left with him, both to show Stuart to the exit and give us a little time alone. As I moved to close the door behind them, I couldn’t help noticing Alec lurking around in the hallway. He had an odd look on his face. Something that resembled concern. I glared at him before closing the door with more force than necessary.
A little while later, a gentle knock sounded on the door. I called out for them to come in, surprised to find that it was Stacia and Joe.
“We wanted to come see how the patient is doing,” Joe said.
Kat rolled her eyes. “I’m fine. I still plan to dance tonight.”
“We were told you’ve had a parade of people in here to check out your ankle…” Stacia said.
Her tone was accusatory, like she didn’t believe everything was ok to continue.
Kat shrugged. “Dieter called in his doctor and physiotherapist as a precaution.”
Joe kneeled in front of Kat. He had a frown on his face, like something was weighing on him. It was about this time that Mark and Stefanie appeared in the doorway, waving. But then they paused when they saw Stacia and Joe.
“Kat, we’ve received some information that suggests you’ve been worse off this whole season than what you’ve led us to believe. That’s something that we need to take seriously. For your safety and Dieter’s.”
Kat’s eyes narrowed as her jaw tensed. I could almost see the steam coming out of her ears from how angry she looked.
“Who told you that?” she asked.
Stacia stepped closer. “Is it true?”
“No, it’s not fucking true. I’m no worse now than I have been the last four seasons. It’s arthritis pain, not a terminal illness. This is obviously a ploy to get us out.”
Stacia and Joe gave each other a weary glance.
“Who told you this?” Kat asked again.
Joe pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “It was Alec…but we…
Kat held up a finger. “Nu uh. No buts. Why would you even think about listening to him? He doesn’t speak for me.”
Joe’s shoulders sagged. “We had to consider if it could be true because he would know something like that, given that you two were together. But yes, I know he’s also vindictive and full of shit. However, I felt like I needed to do my due diligence and at least ask.”
Stacia cut in, “We still need to consider if you’re well enough to continue, though. Are you sure you’re good to do it another week? I’ve got a replacement on standby if you can’t. If Dieter makes it through this week, we’ll still pay you as long as you make an appearance.”
Kat shook her head. “Look, the doctor cleared me. I’m good. And I’m not putting Dieter at a disadvantage by sticking him with a new partner just to make you two feel better about yourselves.”
I moved to stand next to Kat. “Also…I’m not dancing with anyone else. I already told you that. I’m perfectly fine dropping out if she can’t continue.”
Mark and Stefanie stepped further into the room, looking as annoyed as Kat and me.
“If Kat says she can dance, she can dance. I volunteer to work with them if she needs an extra hand with training him next week,” Mark said.
Stacia and Joe looked surprised at the offer, but it seemed to do the trick. They were nodding in agreement as they turned to look at each other.
“Fine. Kat, you focus on rehearsing with Dieter. We won’t put you in any of the group performances. At least that will give you some time to rest up,” Joe finally said.
Then he turned to Mark. “We’ll leave you off the group performances too, just in case Kat needs you.” He paused in thought, turning to Stacia. “I guess we need to pull whoever else makes it to next week as well, just so we aren’t being accused of playing favorites.”
It didn’t escape my notice that they were all acting as if we were moving on to the finals. It quickly went from an “if” to sound inevitable. I wasn’t upset by that way of thinking.
Our conversation was interrupted by staff from the costume department bringing in our costumes. The odd glances from everyone as they left told me they thought it odd that Kat was getting dressed in my dressing room. They were even more puzzled when I closed the door behind them.
Kat chuckled, having noticed it too. “I guess us getting dressed together will probably be some gossip that’ll spread like wildfire later.”
I shrugged, past caring. “Oh well.”
I helped Kat get dressed, finding the women’s costumes to be much more complicated than anything I had worn. Honestly, it seemed like too much work for such little fabric. That didn’t stop me from admiring her as she wriggled into the black and gold fringy contraption.
Once I finally had her dressed and situated in the chair with her feet elevated, I got dressed. First stripping down to my boxer briefs and parading through the room on the hunt for my deodorant. I didn’t want to start stinking. But I really only did it to mess with Kat. I could feel her eyes burning into me. When I finally turned to glance at her, she had that sexy little smirk on her face.
“See something you like, Kitten?”
She huffed out a laugh. “You know I do. You’re doing that on purpose. You’re such a little shit sometimes."
I let out a loud, throaty laugh, feeling rather pleased with myself. I turned and opened the garment bag that held my costume, first pulling out the gold chain that was looped around the top.
Kat clenched her thighs together and sighed. “Oh. They gave you a slutty little chain again, did they? Fucking hell.”
I chuckled. I had noticed her eyeballing it during our photoshoot. So, I asked to wear it again.
I sighed dramatically. “Too bad you’re all injured. I guess that means no pre-performance ritual this week.”
“Trust me. I can still make that happen…”
Her phone dinged loudly in her hand before she could finish the sentence. She went quiet as I pulled on my pants.
“What the fuck!?!” she exclaimed
I walked over, pulling my button-up shirt over my shoulders. “What’s wrong?”
“Someone has told TMZ we’re not performing tonight. Look!”
She held up her phone, revealing the headlines: Dieterina is OUT After On-Set Injury.
I waved it off. “Does it really matter? And that's a cute picture. When did they sneak that?”
I ignored his commentary.
“Yes, it matters! If our fans think we’re not performing, they won’t watch. AND they won’t vote. It will skew the scores in someone else’s favor.”
“Ooooh. FUCK.”
“We may need to clear this up. The show starts soon.”
Her phone dinged again. Her face hardened as she read the message.
“Fucking Anika. Mark thinks it was her. He said she was asking around about us. Makes sense. As much as I hate to admit it, they are the weakest couple left. Even Alec and Lana are doing better than they are.”
I sighed. Fucking Anika. “I’ll be happy to never have to deal with this chick again.”
We got to work, each of us making a social media post letting everyone know that we would, in fact, be performing. I also posted a snarky story and tagged TMZ to let them know they fucked up. Thanks to them, the stress over tonight’s performance had been taken to new levels.
(Click to enlarge. More after the images.)
All we could do at that point was hope that our fans got the message, because in a matter of minutes, the show was starting.
It was almost time for us to perform. We were in the staging area, waiting to be called to the dance floor. Kat set her crutches to the side, wincing as she put a little pressure on the affected limb.
“How’s it feeling?” I asked.
She shook her head. “My ankle feels fine. It’s the pad of my foot that’s killing me.”
I squatted and began unfastening her heel.
“What are you doing?”
“You’re not wearing these. It’s making it worse. We’ll go barefoot.”
I could feel eyes on us as she steadied herself on my shoulder. I knew we had to be fueling all sorts of gossip today, but I didn’t care. She was my only concern.
“Stacia and Joe are not gonna like this.”
I shrugged. “I don’t really care.”
My hands rubbed along her feet, making sure the physio tape was still in place. Then, I stood, holding her at the waist.
“Any better?”
She nodded. “Yeah. It’s bearable without all the pressure there.”
“Good. We’ll go with it then.”
She watched me take my shoes off. As I pulled my socks off, I realized the behind-the-scenes cameras were on us. The online gossip was probably off the charts right now.
I tossed our shoes over in a corner, out of the way. Then I leaned in closely to Kat with a smirk.
“You know, we might get some sympathy votes over the injury. Maybe that TMZ article won’t fuck us up too badly.”
She laughed. “Let's hope. I’d really like to see Anika get voted off tonight after that.”
My fingers brushed through a strand of waves hanging over her shoulder as I stared at her, taking a minute to admire how amazing she looked. It hit me then. This whole experience will be over soon. It could end tonight. If not tonight, it will definitely be over next week. Something about that scared me a little. I couldn’t help wondering how that would change things between us. Would we still have the same strong connection without all the dancing? I know that was a worry Kat had. I shook it off. There was no breaking this thing between us. It went deeper than the dancing. No one could convince me otherwise.
Minutes later, we were called to the dance floor. I carried Kat out to her place. She giggled the whole way, saying she felt ridiculous. I shrugged it off.
“Sympathy votes. Remember?”
To which she only laughed harder.
There was a low murmur that swept through the audience when we appeared. I felt a little smug knowing that this would probably be the thing that dominated conversations about tonight's show. Stacia and Joe wanted drama. They were definitely getting it.
As the lights dimmed, a hushed silence spread through the audience. You could have heard a pin drop. I could feel and hear my heart pounding in my chest. The nervous energy that was humming through my body reminded me that this performance had to be perfect, or there was a real chance this all ended tonight.
I took Kat’s hand, her eyes locking with mine as we waited for the music. It was a simple action, but it calmed me instantly. We were in our zone. I knew then, there was no stopping us.
The funky beats of Shake Ya Ass vibrated through the ballroom. The crowd whooped and whistled as we launched into our samba with a hip-hop twist. Kat was on fire, not even seeming like she had injured herself hours earlier. She twisted and spun like she owned the place. Like always, I followed her lead, effortlessly matching her rhythm and speed. We bounced and grooved, our feet completely in sync as our bodies chased the beat.
She spun into me, her back against my chest, as we dropped low. Our hips swaying and shoulders rolling in unison. It was a little dirty, and the crowd fucking loved it. The roar was almost deafening, causing us both to laugh. Somehow, during it all, I forgot about the cameras, the judges, and the pressure. It was just us, doing what we do best - getting lost in each other and dancing.
I was nervous about the lift, afraid Kat wouldn’t be able to pull it off. However, she didn’t hesitate, leaping into my arms. She had so much trust in me. I would never understand how or why, but she did. It was the greatest gift she could ever give me.
I caught her, moving into the spin, then lowered her back to the ground just like we practiced a hundred times. The motion was fluid, perfectly executed. From the smile on her face, I could tell we were killing it.
We hit our final pose, arms out and breathing hard with wide smiles. The crowd erupted in cheers and applause.
I turned to Kat, and she was laughing with tears in her eyes. She had danced through the pain, and me through the nervousness and doubts. I pulled her into a tight hug, dying to kiss her - but held back. We already caused enough gossip for one day.
Even though I was still trying to catch my breath, I scooped her up to carry her off the dance floor, over to the judges for scoring and feedback. I could feel the sweat dripping down my back as we waited. I wasn’t sure how much of it was from the nerves and how much was from dancing.
Three of the four judges loved it. Calling it bold with a lot of attitude and commitment.
The fourth was on the fence. He was a traditionalist, saying that he preferred a textbook samba and called it a risk. He did give us credit in that it was entertaining and that everyone seemed to love it, but his comments made me nervous about our scores.
Kat reassuringly squeezed my hand as she smiled at me. She still looked confident, believing in me. In us. It only made me smile wider. She had a way of making me believe in myself, and I suddenly felt grateful for that as we stood waiting for our scores.
After a quick chat about Kat’s injury earlier in the day and how she was doing, they finally got to the scores. Three tens and one nine. Not a perfect score, but I’d still take it. Though I didn’t think it was fair to knock us down a point because it wasn’t a “traditional” samba.
I put my arm around Kat and helped her off camera, where we were met with a PA who handed her crutches over. We made our way back to our seats to watch the rest of the show. Kat was watching me with a smile, her eyes sparkling.
“What?” I asked with a smirk.
“You kicked ass out there tonight.”
I shook my head. “No. WE kicked ass out there tonight. I never would have guessed you had any type of injury.”
She chuckled. “I think between the steroids, pain relievers, and the seriously high adrenaline levels that kicked in, it didn’t even register once we got going. In an hour or so, that may be a different story.”
I grabbed my phone from under the chair to check social media. I couldn’t help laughing as I looked at the trending topics.
“#BareFootSamba is apparently trending right now.”
Kat nearly cackled. “Yaaas! Fuck heels! Maybe Stacia and Joe will stop being pains in the ass over the shoe rules.”
Kat grabbed her phone and began scrolling as well. “Ahh, fans are calling that performance iconic. I guess we just made history, Bravo.”
She was quiet for a beat, then let out a low giggle before she began reading from the social media comments.
“The way Dieter cares for Kat, swoon! And the way he looks at her! You can’t tell me that’s not a man in love.”
I shrugged. “Busted, I guess. I’m not so sure it’s a secret anymore.”
Kat smiled mischievously. “I think we can let them speculate a little longer.”
I nodded, agreeing with her as I watched her type something out on her phone. It was kind of fun to mess with everyone.
(More after the picture. Sneaky Kat. 😏)
I had a dopey grin on my face. I couldn’t even pretend to hide how excited I was. Especially after seeing Anika’s performance. Her partner seriously fumbled this week, which had me feeling zero worry as we lined up for the final results of the night.
They called our names first, safe for the finals. Marc and Stefanie were next. I have to admit, seeing Alec and Lana and Anika and her partner in the bottom two made me feel giddier than I should have been. I would have been fine with either couple being voted out. However, there was something sort of poetic about facing off against Alec in the finals. I knew it would only make his defeat that much sweeter. I couldn’t wait for Kat and me to proudly wave that trophy around in front of him.
Next: Week 12 (Finals)
A/N: Hello my lovelies! Forgive me for being a couple days later than planned on this one. I had something come up on Friday (don't worry, it was a good thing) and it sort of took over my weekend plans to prepare for it.
Anywho, one chapter left. How are we feeling? I'm sad. I will miss these two dummies. But, at least they are in a happy place now. They are ridiculously cute and in love.
This chapter had some positive feels with the paintings, the house key, the spinach pie, and even Dieter's therapy appointment. They are too much.
Poor Kat is having a rough go. Are we shocked Alec is meddling now? Do we think he's done? And Anika was still causing mayhem, too. Don't worry, she's done. 😅
And the answer to the teaser poll was...Lydia! Are you shocked she's threatening to thieve Dieter and embrace the throuple life? And she's coming for a visit! That should be interesting!
And Evan...the man is a gem. Seriously. But guess what... he and Lydia will finally meet! I feel like there will be some fun banter with them (and Cora).
And last, but not least... I will leave you with this chapter's Samba video. I'll admit, I did have another video picked out and a completely different song and routine planned for Dieter and Kat in this chapter. And then this happened on the current season of DWTS. It screams Dieter and Kat. So yes, I took a lot of inspo from it. Enjoy.🤭
Closed Position Masterlist ||| Main Masterlist
Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)
Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble.
Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo.
Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.
Chapter Word Count: 12.3K
👉 Fic Warnings: Sexual tension, mutual pining, angst, so much smut (we get a little dom and sub Dieter, intimacy, use of a sex toy, sex acts in public, spanking...really it's all too much to list here - it's Dieter, use your imagination), spicy language, themes dealing with intimate partner violence (not by Dieter), past alcohol abuse, past drug abuse, and shitty parents. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Cat dad / plant dad Dieter comes with his own warnings.
Chapter Quote:
"You’re not trying to fuck me too, are you?”
Kat’s POV
I stood staring at my puffy eyes in the mirror, now all cried out after a sleepless night alone in my own bed. I sighed, wondering if Dieter would even show up for this morning’s scheduled production meeting. The thought made me feel sick. I didn’t know what to say to him or if he would even speak to me. I wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t as I now realized how the things I said must have sounded. I was treating him like everyone else had, by not believing in him and taking his sobriety seriously. That wasn’t my intention. The problem was me, not him. However, I didn’t know how to make him see that without it sounding like I didn’t trust that he had changed. Truth be told, deep down, there may have been some doubt driving it all and I just didn’t want to admit it.
I puffed air out of my cheeks as I pulled my tank top off, my eyes dropping to the marks left by Dieter’s mouth on my breast. The memory of our Sunday morning exploits filled my thoughts. The way he knew me and my body without me ever having to say a word. How every second we spent together was filled with intimacy unlike anything I had ever experienced. This is why it was hard for me to understand why my mind was telling me that it was superficial and circumstantial.
I reached for the braid in my hair, pulling out the tie before working my fingers through it to loosen the strands from their confines. Dieter had been doing this for me. It had quickly become one of our morning rituals. My fingers didn’t feel the same as his. He wasn’t standing behind me, catching my gaze in the mirror with a smirk on his lips - and it was my fault. It was then I realized that I had given him everything, body and soul, and he still held those pieces. I knew that I would never get them back and I didn’t know how to handle it.
I could feel the tears threatening to fall again, but somehow managed to shake them off as I stepped into the shower. I stood there for a time, allowing the hot spray to run down my face and hopefully calm the swelling caused by my emotional state. I felt like a mess, but eventually settled into a hazy numbness that I knew would be needed to get through the day and probably the next four weeks.
I soon found myself walking toward Television City Studios without even remembering how I got there. The whole morning was a blur. I paused outside the door, allowing my eyes to scan the lot for Dieter’s car but I didn’t see it. I sighed in frustration, realizing I probably needed to have an excuse planned for Stacia and Joe in case he didn’t show up.
As I sat waiting, my leg bounced incessantly. My eyes shifted between the clock on the wall and the entry door, anxiously awaiting Dieter’s arrival. When one of the young PA’s came to call me back for the meeting, he still hadn’t arrived. I nodded and stood to make my way to the conference room. When I entered, Stacia and Joe eyed me before their eyes trailed toward the door.
Stacia was the first to speak, “Where’s Dieter?”
I opened my mouth to respond but was cut off before I said anything.
“I’m here,” Dieter called from the doorway as he rushed in to take the seat to my right. “Sorry, I got held up in traffic.”
I exhaled a shaky breath that I didn’t realize I had been holding. I chanced a glance in his direction. He was staring straight ahead at Stacia and Joe, not even bothering to acknowledge me. He was wearing a hat and sunglasses. I could just make out his creased brows as his jaw tightened. My eyes drifted down, noticing the rise and fall of his chest. His breathing was shallow, like he was having trouble catching a breath, but he didn’t let it show. Instead, he kept a stony expression fixed on the two people sitting across the table from us. I noticed he had one hand fisted on his thigh, clenching and unclenching, no doubt leaving fingernail imprints on his palm as he did so.
I had to force myself to look away, my gaze now settling on Stacia and Joe who seemed to be watching us in silence. They were clearly already sensing the awkward energy between us. Stacia’s head tilted to the side, “What happened to you two last night? You weren’t there for the bottom three announcements.”
Dieter’s head turned toward me, that stony expression still on his face. I glanced over at him, but I couldn’t read him without seeing his eyes. I found myself wishing he would take those fucking sunglasses off.
I cleared my throat, “I’m sorry, I wasn’t feeling well. I uhh, got sick.”
Stacia’s left brow ticked upward, “Are you still feeling ill? Do we need to get someone else to step in this week?”
I shook my head, “No…No, I’m fine now. I think it was something I ate.”
Her eyes shifted between us. She definitely didn’t buy that. The tension between us was too obvious. There was no hiding it.
“Everything still going well between you two?” she asked.
I rubbed at my temple nervously. I didn’t know how to answer that.
“Yeah, everything’s fine,” Dieter said. His voice was gruff. Raw. Like he had just woken up, except there was an undertone of something else. Sadness maybe? He didn’t sound very convincing, and it made my chest ache.
They didn’t question it further, but I knew that they knew something was wrong. I could see it on their faces as they went through the motions of going through this week's routine. We would be doing Jazz, for which I was thankful. It was less intimate and would allow us to have some distance from each other. I didn’t pay any attention to the costume sketches. I stared at the pages without seeing them as I nodded in approval. I couldn’t even remember what the song of the week was as they wrapped up the meeting.
Dieter inhaled a deep breath and stood, not hesitating to head toward the hallway as Stacia asked me to hang back for a moment. Dieter glanced in my direction, gnawing on the inside of his cheek before he stepped out of the room. I gave Stacia a tight smile as Joe spoke up, “We just wanted to check in and make sure Alec is keeping his distance?”
The question caught me off guard. Alec was the last thing on my mind at the moment. I managed a nod, “Yeah…he’s keeping away. I’ve not had any issues with him.”
They both gave me tight smiles and nodded. “Good. Let us know if that changes, please,” Joe replied.
“Yeah, of course,” I agreed before standing. “Anything else?” I asked.
They shook their heads, and I took that as my cue to leave. As I said my goodbyes, I could feel their eyes on me until I was out of sight. Dieter and I had almost certainly set them into a tailspin with this development.
When I got to the lobby, I scanned the area for Dieter, but he was nowhere to be found. I knew it was wishful thinking, but he had come to the meeting. Hopefully he would come to rehearsal, too - give me a chance to clarify what I was feeling. I needed him to know that it wasn’t him. I needed to make him understand that much at least.
I left after that, my eyes still surveying the lot for him as I got into my car. He was long gone. I puffed air out of my cheeks as I decided to go pick up a quick lunch. I settled on fast food, realizing nothing looked appetizing as I stared at the menu board. I ended up with a grilled chicken sandwich that I didn’t really eat. I mostly just picked at it and nibbled on a few fries. I hated wasting food, but I just couldn't stomach it. I felt too disgusted with myself. I threw a handful of fries out for the waiting birds, then threw everything else in the trash.
After watching the birds devour the fries for a few minutes, I headed toward the dance studio for rehearsal. Dieter wasn’t there. I tried to ignore that twisted feeling in the pit of my stomach that told me he wasn’t coming, but it was hard. That feeling intensified with each passing second.
After twenty minutes, I decided to pull up our song to keep myself occupied. The song was called One Heart. I lay there on the floor with my eyes closed, thinking through possible choreography for the week while trying not to pay attention to the lyrics about a breakup and all the things left unsaid between two people. The producers really did have an unsettling ability to choose songs to fit the mood of the week.
Thirty more minutes passed, and Dieter was still a no show. I grabbed my phone to check if I had any messages. Nothing. He was almost an hour late. He wasn’t coming. I fought back tears at the realization. I don’t really know what I expected. I probably would have done the same thing if I were him, but I at least would have told him I wasn’t coming. I opened my messenger app and found his name.
Me: Are you coming to rehearsal?
I watched as the indicator immediately changed to “Read”. The three bubbles began bouncing indicating he was typing, but then stopped. This happened several more times before his reply finally came through.
Dieter: I can’t do it today. I’m sorry. I tried, but I can’t.
The tears that I had been holding in, finally slipped free. He didn’t have to say it. I could read between the lines. He was hurting. Because of me. I sat staring at the wall for a beat, forcing myself to feel the self-inflicted pain that I deserved. I wiped the tears away, then glanced back down at my phone. Hopeful as I typed out a reply.
Me: It’s ok. We can pick it up tomorrow.
I waited, watching the bubbles bounce, pause, then start again.
Dieter: Yeah, maybe.
Well, it wasn’t a no, and he didn’t tell me to fuck off. So, maybe it was a small win.
Instead of going home and licking my wounds, I stayed at the studio and worked on our routine. I did still have a job to do after all. It would be better to have something started than nothing at all.
I damn near had our entire routine planned out as I sunk into bed that evening, worn out and aching from pushing myself to go through it the best I could without a partner. Even though my body was tired, my mind was not. It was another restless night.
On Wednesday, I awoke feeling like my body was twisted in a knot. Everything hurt, but I persevered - taking a scorching hot shower and loading up on anti-inflammatory pain relievers. It helped enough to make it bearable. I felt almost human as I walked into the empty dance studio. To pass time, I began stretching. The anxious feeling quickly returned to the pit of my stomach, that fear that Dieter wasn’t going to show again. If he didn’t show today, I wasn’t sure if we would make it through this week.
An hour passed, and I lost hope. I wasn’t about to sit here for the full seven and a half hours if he wasn't planning to come. I took a deep breath as I reached for my phone.
Me: Just checking in…are you coming to rehearsal today?
It was marked as read almost immediately. I waited at least ten minutes before his response finally came through.
Dieter: Yes.
I suddenly felt nauseous. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to see him, but I didn’t really have a choice. We still had a job to do.
Twenty-five more minutes passed, and he still hadn’t shown up. I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose as I walked into the hallway and peered out the windows into the parking lot. I was surprised to see his car sitting in the front row. He was still in the driver's seat with his head leaned back against the headrest, not moving for several minutes.
Eventually, the door opened, and he stepped out. He stood there, staring toward the building as he raked a hand down his face. He sighed heavily as he leaned against the car and shook his head. Then he turned, sinking back into the driver’s seat. His feet were still planted on the pavement as he placed his elbows on his knees and buried his face in his hands. I knew I shouldn’t be watching him, but I couldn’t help it. Some part of me needed to see this. To see what I was doing to him.
I wanted to go to him, but I didn’t feel like that would be the right thing to do. I didn’t want to send mixed signals because I still felt like we needed some space so that I could figure my stuff out. It wouldn’t be fair to string him along if I wasn’t sure what I wanted.
His hands slid upward, pushing his hair away from his brow. He sat with his hands on his head, staring at the pavement for what seemed like forever. He puffed air out of his cheeks, then finally stood. He turned to grab his phone, keys, and water bottle out of the car before walking toward the entrance. I took a deep, calming breath as I headed back to our assigned studio space.
It was several minutes before he finally entered the room. I assumed he had to give himself one last pep talk beforehand. He didn’t look at me as he walked over to sit his things down on a nearby chair. I could tell he was taking deep, controlled breaths as he turned to face me. He kept his head down, wringing his hands together as he approached.
Now that I was seeing him up close, without his sunglasses, I could see how tired he looked. He had dark circles under his eyes and his face looked puffy. His hair was a mess, like he had run his fingers through it a million times. His patchy beard was more scruffy than normal, sticking out in all directions. I wanted nothing more than to hug him.
He finally raised his head, looking everywhere but at my face. That hurt more than I realized it would.
“Dieter, I…” I started, but he held up his hand to stop me.
He shook his head, “I don’t wanna talk about it. We have a job to do. That’s what I’m here for. I’ll keep it professional, as requested.”
My heart was pounding in my ears. I was not expecting him to handle it like this.
“Can I just…” I began again, but he cut me off.
“No. If it’s not about the routine, I don’t wanna hear it.”
I sighed, accepting defeat. I could see the pain in his eyes, and it was killing me. I didn’t know what to say that would take it away. I realized there was nothing I could say to him right now that wouldn’t make it worse.
“Ok. Let’s go over what I have so far then. We’ve got a lot of lost time to make up for.”
We got to work. The undercurrent of tension never ceasing as we went through the motions. Everything between us felt negatively charged. The dancing was different. Our connection fragmented. We no longer moved as one. It was messy, causing frustrations to rise as we both struggled through it.
When our rehearsal time was up, Dieter didn’t linger. He grabbed his belongings and told me to have a good evening and quickly exited the studio without a second glance in my direction. I was slower to leave, reaching my car about five minutes or so after he had left. I was surprised to find that he was still in the lot. He didn’t move to leave until I was in my car with the door shut. I guessed there were some habits that he wouldn’t be giving up.
I woke up on Thursday feeling just as shitty as the day before. I wasn’t taking care of myself, and my body wasn’t happy about it. Add that to the loneliness I was feeling and the sadness over Dieter and it made for a bad morning.
Not to mention that it was filming day, and I was absolutely dreading it. After how it had gone the previous day with Dieter, I wasn’t sure how things were going to appear anywhere remotely close to normal. I knew it would be obvious to anyone watching that something was off between us.
Dieter and I arrived at the dance studio close to the same time. The filming crew was already nearly finished with setup, so we got started with our stretches. There was no helping each other stretch or playful banter between us like there normally was. We were silent and avoided eye contact. It was already setting the stage for the massive blow up to come.
I could tell from the glances that the crew were shooting at each other that they were picking up on the weird vibes. It wasn’t like they were hard to miss. Things started off cordial between us, much like the previous day. However, it was clear there were lingering frustrations with the routine. Dieter was having a hard time focusing and picking up the steps. It was Jazz, not the typical ballroom stuff, so it did make things a little more complicated. I knew he was better than this though. I knew it was because his mind was on other things.
Three hours in, we were both still fumbling through the routine. We were completely out of sync and tripping over each other. The more I pointed out his mistakes and tried to correct them, the more frustrated he got. In turn, causing him to make more mistakes. I really wasn’t trying to pick on him, instead trying to stay focused on the choreography since we had cameras on us.
For the first time ever, we started bickering. The escalating tension was evident and only encouraged the camera crew to stick around longer than they normally would have. We were slowly turning into a ticking time bomb, arguing about everything aside from what we really needed to talk about.
It all finally came to a head as we practiced a lift. He didn’t lean his head back like he was supposed to as he hoisted me upward, which resulted in him getting knocked in the face by my knee. It wasn’t the first time I had accidentally hit him in some way while dancing, but it was the first time he almost dropped me because of it.
He scrambled to catch me just before my face smacked the ground, managing to gain control at the last second and set me down carefully as he let out a loud groan. His mic pack came unclipped from his waistband and banged against the floor next to my head as he turned away rubbing at his lower back. I reacted quickly, knocking it away before it swung at me. It was still hanging from the cord, dragging behind Dieter as he walked in a wide circle, pushing through whatever pain he was feeling.
“Are you ok?” I asked.
His eyes cut toward me, anger flashing in them in a way I had never seen. “No, I’m not fucking OK. I almost dropped you and I think I pulled something.”
His harsh tone made me flinch, surprising me more than anything. I watched as he turned to continue his pacing, then nearly tripped over the mic pack that was still trailing after him. He was clearly at his limit as he reached for the cord to lift the pack into his hand. Then he shocked us all by yanking the wire loose from his shirt and slung the whole thing toward the wall with enough force that it broke into several pieces. He promptly turned on his heel, muttering obscenities as he walked through the double doors, leaving us all in stunned silence.
All eyes eventually turned to me. I sucked in a sharp breath, realizing that the whole incident had been caught on camera. Fuck.
One of the crew asked me what was going on. So, I gave the best lie I could come up with in the moment. I shrugged, “We’ve been going nonstop for nine weeks. We’re tired, we’re old, and everything hurts. It’s just taking its toll.”
I finally stood from where I had been sitting on the floor, “I’ll go check on him.”
They moved to follow me, but I stopped them, reaching to remove my mic pack. “No. It’s better if you don’t come. Just…lemme talk to him in private, please.”
They relented, hanging back as I moved out to the hallway. I glanced around, but didn’t see him. His phone was still lying in the studio, so I didn’t think he had left. I decided to check outside, which is where I found him leaning against the side of his car. He had one arm wrapped around his torso, the elbow of the other propped on it as he rubbed at the crease between his brows. His entire body looked tense, coiled tight and waiting to explode.
I approached him cautiously, not even really sure of what to say because this obviously wasn’t about the rehearsal. I settled on, “Is your back OK?”
He scoffed, “Yeah…but I can’t do this. I can’t keep doing this. It’s too much for me.”
I sighed, “So, what? You’re just gonna quit?”
He shrugged, “It would be better than torturing myself.”
I felt like he had just knocked the wind out of me. I shook my head, “No, I’ll just ask to have someone replace me. You deserve to finish.”
He was shaking his head now as he stared at the ground, “No. I’m never dancing with anyone else. I can’t.”
I let out a humorless laugh, “I’m sure it wouldn’t take you long to get over it if you got a new partner. Dancing has a way of doing that.”
He scoffed, the hint of anger that I saw flash in his eyes earlier was back. “You have no right telling me about my feelings. I know what I’m feeling, and I know it’s real. You’re a hypocrite and a coward for believing otherwise.”
It was my turn to scoff, “Excuse me? How the hell am I a hypocrite and coward for trying to be honest with you about where I’m at emotionally?”
He gave me a deadpan stare, “Are you fucking serious right now? You preach about believing people can change and giving them second chances when you won’t even give me the first one. You’re too fucking scared to even try. Meanwhile you gave that abusive asshole how many chances? And I can’t even get one to prove myself to you. I’m never gonna treat you the way he did. I care about you too much to do that.”
I stood with my mouth agape, not even sure how to respond. He wasn’t wrong, I hadn’t really given him a chance. And deep down, I knew my choices were being driven by fear, but that didn’t mean my worries were any less legitimate.
“Dieter…it’s not that simple. This is complicated for me…and I just need…”
“I’m in love with you,” he blurted out in a rush.
“time…what?” I was convinced I heard him wrong.
His dark watery gaze was almost owlish as he stared at me, “I said, I’m in love with you…Kat.”
I felt paralyzed by his words. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak. I just stood there peering up at him in disbelief. He looked deflated when I didn’t say anything in return, and it crushed me. I wanted to scream the same sentiment from the roof tops, but I was too fucking scared. Admitting to those feelings was giving him too much control. It would mean that I was letting him in. All the way. And I still wasn’t sure if I was ready for that.
He took a step toward me, his eyes boring into mine as he continued. “You can choose not to believe me if you want…but I need you to know that’s where I’m at. I’ve never said those words to anyone in my life. No one has ever made me feel this way. That’s how I know it’s real. It’s not some bullshit on set hookup. It never was. I knew you were it for me at the beginning of our first rehearsal and that’s never gonna change.”
I could feel the tears pooling in my eyes. I wanted to close the distance between us, tell him I was sorry and wrong and beg him to forget everything I had said, but I couldn’t. The fear was still holding me back and somehow escalating to crippling levels with his words.
When I still didn’t respond, any remaining hope he had seemed to fade from his eyes. The crease between his brows was deeper than I had ever seen as his lips set into a tight line with a slight downward turn. He nodded, seeming to take my lack of response as his answer.
He reached into his pocket for his keys as he turned, opening the car door to get inside. I somehow managed to catch my breath and find my voice, “No, wait. I…just need time, OK? That’s all I’m asking for.”
He paused and sighed, not bothering to look my way as he responded. “If that’s all you can say to me right now, then I think I know where I stand. I just wish you would admit it.”
I shook my head as the tears fell freely, “Dieter…no. That’s not…”
He didn’t even let me finish before he got into the car, shutting the door and starting the ignition without another glance in my direction. I could see the pain etched on his face as he backed out of the parking space and disappeared from my sight.
Without warning, a sob burst from my chest. I was fucking this up so badly and I didn’t even fully understand why. He was doing everything right. He made me happy. I felt safe with him. We were amazing together. Yet, I was still holding back. His past did worry me, but he hadn’t given me any reason to doubt that he had changed. He couldn’t help that his past behavior lingered in the minds of others who now judged him incorrectly. I knew that, yet I was still letting it warp my feelings about who he was now. I knew most of this confusion and fear was being caused by Alec. I may have removed him from my life, but he was still controlling it - controlling me. I hated myself for allowing it.
Once I finally pulled myself together the best I could, I had to go back inside and tell the film crew we were done for the day. Internally I was fuming because I knew Stacia and Joe would find out about everything that just happened before I even stepped foot inside my house this evening.
I didn’t linger, I was packed up and out the door before the film crew. I realized Dieter had indeed left his phone, so I grabbed it to take with me. When I got home, I unlocked it to find Evan’s number so I could let him know that I had it. I was surprised to discover that the wallpaper was a picture of me cuddling Zee. It was one I hadn’t seen. I wasn’t even sure when he had taken it. It had me feeling teary eyed all over again.
(More good stuff after the images. Click to enlarge.)
I opened his contacts, shocked that he didn’t have many numbers saved. He wasn’t lying when he said he cleaned out his phone. It only took me a second to scroll down to Evan’s name to get his number.
After firing off a text to Evan, I opened Dieter’s photo app. I knew I shouldn’t, but curiosity got the best of me. He had an album called ‘Things to Remember’ that jumped out at me. It had random screenshots of quotes and recipes. There were also pictures of his Oscar, plants, Zee, and me. So many pictures of me that I didn’t know he had taken. It made me feel warm, causing my heart to race.
I wondered why he had these specific pictures in this album. Then I realized, aside from the quotes and recipes, it was a collection of moments he wanted to remember as they were - as he saw them. Just quick snaps of time to hold onto, almost like he expected them to disappear. Or like he needed a reminder that they were real. I wondered what he thought about when he looked at them. Did each one stir a specific emotion that he didn’t want to forget? It was the only thing that made sense.
Some of the pictures seemed so random. The first that stood out was me lying snuggled in his bed with my bare back exposed and bathed in sunlight, hair fanned out around my head. There was another of me in the kitchen, wearing nothing but his t-shirt as I made dinner. Another of me deep in concentration as I worked to carefully prune one of his plants. There were so many of me and Zee. I couldn’t help smiling as I looked through them, each one a reminder of how happy he made me. This was what I needed to focus on. Not all the static and noise from everyone else.
I turned my attention to screenshots of quotes. A couple of them made my heart clench in my chest. Especially the two most recent ones that were dated from the previous day.
“The sensitive suffer more; but they love more, and dream more.”
“I wanted you to see the mess and still find me worthy of love, to tell me that you could still love me anyway.”
I sighed, wiping away a few stray tears as I locked Dieter’s phone and put it on the table. Of all the ways I could have hurt him, this was the worst one. I wasn’t even sure if I could fix it if I wanted to.
A short time later, I received a text from Evan saying he would be by to pick up Dieter’s phone and drop off some of my things. The thought of Dieter removing traces of me from his home hurt. I couldn't blame him though. I probably would have done the same if I were him. Especially if he was hurting as badly as I now realized he was.
When I opened the door, Evan didn’t greet me. Instead, he pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes. I gave him a nervous smile and motioned for him to come inside. He came halfway into the entryway before spinning on his heel, holding out a tote bag in offering.
“Dieter wanted me to drop this stuff off. He thought you might need it while wallowing in self-pity...” He paused, gasping dramatically before continuing. “I mean…he didn’t say that last part. I did. Except I’m not allowed to talk to you about it.”
I gave him a tight smile, “I probably deserved that. It’s fine.”
His eyes surveyed me from head to toe before he finally said, “You look as shitty as he does. I don’t understand what happened…why it’s still happening… Can’t we just apologize to each other and live happily ever after? Because I need happy Dieter back. Sad Dieter is a pain in the ass to deal with.”
I could see why Dieter liked Evan. He really was no nonsense and had a way with words. I guess you have to when you’ve essentially been Dieter Bravo’s babysitter for half his life.
I sighed, “I’m sorry you're stuck in the middle of this. This isn’t…It’s not what I intended to happen. I really just wanted to press pause so I could have a minute to think…to process everything that’s happened…to make sure what we’re feeling is real.”
I moved to sit on the couch. Evan trailed behind and joined me. His face was empathetic as he took in my words.
“Dieter isn’t wrong. I’m scared. I’m feeling a lot of things, and I don’t really know how to process it all. A lot of it is new…and after what I’ve been through with my ex, it’s hard…to…I dunno. Let someone else in? I guess? I’m not really sure. I’m still trying to understand it myself.”
Evan rubbed at the tops of his thighs and sighed, “Well, since I’m not supposed to discuss any of this with you, I definitely didn’t tell you that he’ll forgive you and that he does understand that part. Not that we’ve had in-depth conversations about it or anything…”
I gave him a sad smile. He really was just as ridiculous as Dieter sometimes.
He paused, pulling his lips back as he sucked air through his teeth. “I’m also not telling you that it’s ok to worry about his sobriety and past behavior. It’s a natural human response, especially with his history. I do it every day. I saw his slow spiral and I’ve seen him at his worst. So, I feel like I can confidently say that he has changed. I see it…this is his best…and I worry less and less about it as time goes on. He’s committed now and he’s been doing so fucking good. I have no doubt that if you continue to be in his life, I’d never have to worry again. I’ve never seen him like this…with anyone. Trust me when I say that man is devoted to you in every way. You won’t have to worry about him sliding back into his old ways.”
The tears were falling again. This really was something I needed to hear. It helped smother my dumpster fire of thoughts just a little bit. I also didn’t feel as guilty for letting those things get to me.
“Thank you, Evan. That does hold some weight coming from you. I appreciate you not telling me.”
He smiled, “Can I give you a hug? I feel like you need a hug.”
I laughed, a genuine laugh and nodded. He gave me a real hug. Not a measly lean in and pat on the back. It was firm and warm, the kind that friends share. I was thankful for it.
When he pulled away, he cleared his throat. “Now, I am supposed to tell you that Dieter will be at rehearsal tomorrow. After a mini meltdown he called Lenny and begged to leave the show, but Lenny won’t let him…Actually, I wasn’t supposed to tell you that part. Whatever. Anyway, he’ll be at rehearsal. I hope you two can figure this out. Call me if you need anything, yeah? Even if it’s to not talk about any of this.”
I gave him another sad smile as he picked up Dieter’s phone from the table and stood to leave. It hurt to know that Dieter did try to get out of the show, but at least we still had time to figure things out.
After all, time was the only thing I was asking for.
Dieter’s POV
This week had been literal hell for me. I spent Monday night blaming myself. I knew that something was going on with Kat. I could sense her pulling away. I had told myself not to push her and to give her space, only offering support when she needed it. In the past, that had worked. It had been what she wanted. So, I stayed the course this time, trusting that she would talk to me about whatever was bothering her when she was ready. That’s where I had gone wrong. I should have pushed harder. Perhaps if I had, she wouldn’t have spiraled in such an epic way.
I never would have dreamed that she had reached the point of effectively ending things in this way. She said she needed time, but her reasoning for it was a punch to the gut. It hurt like hell to know that she didn’t believe in me, especially after the bullshit she said about believing in second chances. Sure, I’ve had my fair share of second chances as far as my career, and let’s be real - continuing to be alive. Kat hadn’t even given me the first chance though. Not really. She had decided to nope out of it before I even had a chance to fuck things up. The worst part was, I couldn’t really blame her. I never felt worthy of her. Deep down I knew it was too good to last.
And just like that, my self-hatred spiral was back in force. After staying up most of the night I decided that I could manage it and push through. Put a pause on things like she asked and go back to being professional for the sake of the show and my career. My resolve was already faltering when I left for our production meeting on Tuesday. I ended up driving in circles around the studio for at least twenty minutes before I dug up the courage to park and go inside. The timing ended up working out, being called to the conference room as soon as I walked in the door.
If I had come early and been forced to make small talk with Kat beforehand, I wouldn’t have made it through the meeting. I barely made it through as it was. I couldn’t even bring myself to look at her without nearly bursting into tears. Having to sit next to her and hear her voice was bad enough.
When the meeting was over, I exited the room like the building was on fire, but not before catching a quick glimpse of Kat. I realized she looked just as tired and broken as I did. I wanted nothing more than to scoop her up and tell her it would be OK, but I knew that wouldn’t go over well. Truth be told, I didn’t know how to act around her now. I was never going to be able to pick up where we left off before New York. It was impossible. Too much had happened between us for that. Those thoughts only seemed to ramp up my anxiety about the situation and turned me into a wound up, bumbling mess. I knew I couldn’t go to rehearsal like that. I tried, but I couldn’t do it. I felt like such an idiot over the whole thing.
With great effort, I somehow managed to get it together enough to show up for rehearsal on Wednesday. Though I probably would have been better off not going. Things between Kat and I were tense. Broken. We absolutely could not get on the same page. I knew most of it was my fault because I couldn’t focus. It hurt too much to be near her. I couldn’t even look at her directly without my bottom lip quivering like a fucking child.
It didn’t take long for the frustration to set in. I was slowly falling apart, and I knew it. The more I tried to get it together the worse things got, and it was pissing me off. That frustration reached a boiling point while we were filming on Thursday. I almost dropped Kat. If I had, she surely would have gotten hurt, which made me hate myself even more for how ridiculous I was being. She almost got hurt, because of me. It was just too much.
Looking back, I wasn’t proud of how I reacted in that moment. Somehow the old Dieter busted loose from his confines and decided to show his ass for a minute. That’s when I knew that I needed to step away. I was slipping.
I wish I had just left as soon as I went to the car. I knew Kat would come looking for me. I knew she would confront me. What I hadn’t expected was my sudden outburst telling her how deep my feelings really were. It wasn’t the time for it, but I think part of me thought it would make her realize that I was all in for this. Maybe she would see how ridiculous she was being and say everything was going to be OK, but that’s not what happened. She just stood there staring at me like I had three heads and said nothing.
I felt like I had made an ass of myself. I regretted it the second the words left my mouth. However, there was some part of me that was happy it was out there now. At least she knew where I stood, and she could do with it as she pleased. The fact that she didn’t seem to reciprocate the sentiment was hitting me hard though. I would have been better off not knowing.
What happened after that wasn’t my proudest moment. I drove to Evan’s house and essentially had a meltdown on his couch. He did not know how to handle that situation because it was a first. Realizing I had left my phone at the studio, I made him call Lenny so I could beg him to get me off the show. I offered to fake an injury if need be. I wasn’t above it at this point. Lenny’s response was that I needed to put my big boy panties on and that I needed to learn to deal with the consequences of my actions and stop dipping my dick where I work. He wasn’t wrong, but this was different. It was Kat. Not some random hookup.
Evan followed me home after that and put up with my manic frenzy to gather up Kat’s things so that they were out of sight. I couldn’t handle seeing the traces of her in my house. It hurt too much. I needed a clean slate so I could reset. Otherwise, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to do this.
Kat had apparently texted Evan to let him know she had my phone. I shoved him out the door with a bag of her things and gave explicit instructions not to discuss any of this with her while he was there to get my phone. He looked completely exasperated as I slammed the door in his face.
I stayed up pretty much the entire night, alternating between snuggling Zee, plant care, and painting. I couldn’t shut my mind off and felt the need to keep busy, so I didn’t turn to darker methods of coping. I finally fell asleep as the sun was rising, but it wasn’t for long because I had rehearsal.
I slept through my alarm and ended up being an hour late. I was in a bad mood as I made my way into the studio, firing off a quick bullshit response about scheduling conflicts to Dr. Smith’s questions about why I was a no show for my therapy session this week.
When I entered the studio, Kat looked torn between being pissed and empathetic. I knew I looked like shit. I hadn’t even bothered to wash all the paint off my hands before I left the house. She looked like she was about to say something that I wasn’t really in the mood to hear, so I cut her off before she could get the words out.
“Let’s just stick to the topic of dance, please. I don’t think we really need to discuss anything else at this point.”
I still couldn’t look at her, not directly. It was torture. Instead, I looked past her, focusing on the wall at the back of the room as she nodded. We got to it after that. I somehow managed to shut my mind off, going completely numb as we worked in mostly silence. The only words shared between us were about the routine.
Saturday and Sunday rehearsals went pretty much the same way, except I somehow managed to show up on time. Not that I was feeling any better or was able to get any rest. I was just going through the motions. Existing really. Shutting everything off was the only way I could get through this without turning to old habits.
That doesn’t mean that I didn’t feel the distance growing between Kat and me. I felt it every second of the day. I knew she felt it too. I could see it in the way she looked at me in those few instances I managed a quick glance at her face. It was weighing on her, but I reasoned that it was because of how hard I was taking it. Not because she loved me back.
Monday, I woke up feeling anxious, not knowing how the day was going to go. I knew this show day was going to be different and I was dreading it. I arrived at the studio at my usual time. Kat was there as well, which meant we were first to go through camera blocking. It was obvious that we were still not on the same page, both of us making several mistakes on each run through. When we were finished, she gave me a few pointers. Then she disappeared. I assumed she went to her dressing room or maybe to do her final costume fitting.
It felt strange not having her by my side. Others seemed to notice her absence as well, giving me odd glances as I passed by. The whispers started when I showed up for hair and makeup alone. No one would ask me directly, but I could hear the hushed murmurs wondering where Kat was. It definitely didn’t help my sour mood and I’m sure the scowl on my face was only fueling it further. It was a ruthless cycle.
After having a quick costume fitting, I headed to the main ballroom for our dress rehearsal. It was the first time I had seen Kat since camera blocking. We had somehow managed to successfully avoid each other all morning. She looked beautiful as always, wearing some sort of pink fringe thing that looked amazing against her glowing skin. Her face told another story though. She looked tired and sad. I was suddenly worried she hadn’t been taking care of herself like she should. I hated myself all over again for being the reason behind it if that were the case.
I walked over to stand next to her, waiting for our turn. She briefly glanced up at me before turning her gaze downward toward the floor. I inhaled deeply, trying to keep my composure. Everything about this felt wrong and I hated it.
Minutes later, we were called up to go through our routine. On the first run through, I took a wrong step and nearly tripped over her. They made us start over. The second run through went a little better, but the minor mistakes were still happening. We were both making them. This led to more whispers among the cast as we exited the ballroom.
We both went back to our respective dressing rooms after that. Kat walked ahead of me, not looking back as she closed the door behind her. I rubbed at my face, puffing air out of my cheeks as I passed her door to go to mine. This really was fucking torture.
I sat alone in my dressing room after that. I felt lonelier than I ever had, to the point that it was making me sick. This space didn’t feel the same without Kat in it. There was a layer of nervousness there too. I knew this performance would not be one of our best. The competition was down to six couples. It’s not like we had a lot of room to be fucking up at this point. I knew this could be the one that got us voted off the show. Part of me almost welcomed that outcome so that I could get away from the stress of it all. The other part worried it would be the last time I would see Kat and didn’t want it to end.
Before I knew it, we were being called to the staging area for the show to start. I found a spot to watch the show from, trying not to pay attention to the odd looks as I stood alone. I eventually sensed Kat’s presence. She appeared beside me, arms hugging her body as she watched the opening performance. The air felt charged between us, but not in the same way it usually was. It felt thick and suffocating. It made it hard to catch my breath. For the first time in weeks, I found myself wanting alcohol, just so I could get through this. I hated myself for it.
We were soon called to take our places as this weeks behind the scenes footage played on the screens. They were definitely playing up the drama I had caused. I hadn’t really considered how that was going to look to the audience or thought of a response if asked about it. It made my anxiety ramp up just a little bit more. For the first time in days, I met Kat’s gaze fully and held it as we took our places. I could see the worry in her eyes. She knew this wasn’t going to go well as much as I did.
And it didn’t.
There were no smiles between us as we danced. Just concentration and disappointment as we powered through our screw ups. We had a hard time staying in sync, even getting off rhythm a couple of times. It wasn’t a terrible performance, but it wasn’t a week 9 performance. I looked like a rookie in my first week with messy footwork and bad timing.
When we finished, all I could do was shake my head and let out a controlled breath as I followed Kat over to the interview area. They of course asked me what was going on this week. I followed Kat’s explanation of being old and tired and tried to laugh it off. The judges were not impressed. They tore the performance apart and expressed their disappointment, making sure to let us know this wasn’t the time to drop the ball because the remaining couples are going to be tough to beat even when we were performing at a high level. My stomach sank, convinced that tonight would be our last night. They gave us two sixes and two sevens, which was higher than I was expecting. However, it was the lowest score of the night.
Through all of this, Kat stood silently beside me with her hands clasped in front of her. Her eyes seemed to be fixed on something in the distance. She looked like she was completely disassociating. After they read off our scores, she crossed in front of me to exit the stage, pinching the bridge of her nose as she went. My chin dropped to my chest as I followed behind her.
Production Control Room
The production control room was buzzing with activity as the staff worked to certify audience and viewer votes before time to announce the bottom three couples. Stacia and Joe sit impatiently waiting for the results. Both are frustrated by the turn of events with Dieter and Kat. While the drama from rehearsals was definitely setting social media ablaze with speculation, they knew there was a real danger their star couple could be voted off the show after such a lacking performance. When the results are handed over to the two executive producers, they are shocked, but relieved to find that Dieter and Kat placed third in the group of six.
Stacia sinks back into her seat in relief but is contemplative as she eyes Joe. She begins writing the results down on the card that is to be delivered to the host, but Joe grabs her hand to stop her progress as he gives her a pointed look. “What are you doing? We agreed to never tamper with the results…”
She sighed, “It’s not really tampering. The bottom two will still be the same. I just need to give them a little wakeup call so that they get their shit together. Another week of this and they’re gone…and fucking Alec will still be here. What do you think that’ll do to ratings? Especially if word ever gets out about what he actually did to her...”
Joe pulled his hand back, staring at Stacia in thought before nodding for her to continue. Stacia finishes writing in Dieter and Kat’s name and passes the card off to a production assistant to run the results down to the host.
Now all they can do is sit back and wait to see if this play has the intended effect.
Dieter’s POV
When we were called to the stage for the bottom three announcement, I could hear my heart pounding in my ears. I didn’t have a good feeling about this. We ended the night with the lowest score from the judges. The only hope I had left was that the Dieterina Stans voted to keep us around for a little longer, but I wasn’t confident about it.
As the host began calling off the couples that were safe, I could feel my anxiety going up another notch with each name that wasn’t ours. Before I knew it, they were announcing the names of the bottom three couples - which included Kat and me. Then they cut to commercial break. I had to work double time to keep myself from falling apart. I knew this wouldn’t just be the end of our time together on the show, but maybe even the end of whatever I was trying to work toward. She would have no reason to see me after this. She might not want to.
In the midst of my internal spiral, I felt a hand slide against my arm. I glanced down to see Kat’s fingers lacing through mine. I peered over at her, she was staring at me with tears in her eyes. I had to look away, or else I was going to lose it. That didn’t stop me from giving her hand a reassuring squeeze as the on air indicator flickered back to life. I wasn’t sure what it meant, but it gave me some hope that maybe this wasn’t over.
We stood tightly gripping each other's hands as we waited for the next name to be called. I held my breath, damn near passing out before they finally called out our name as being safe. Kat and I both let out a sigh of relief, both of us smiling in each other’s presence for the first time in a week.
As we exited the stage, Kat seemed to get emotional. I asked her if she was OK, but she waved me off as she exited to the hallway. I raked a hand down my face, unsure of how to proceed after the moment we had just shared on stage. I decided to follow after her, assuming she had gone to her dressing room, but she wasn’t there.
I sighed, as I looked around the hallway that was slowly filling with cast members. She was nowhere in sight. So, I decided to go to my dressing room and wait. After changing out of my costume, I hung it outside the door for pickup and purposefully left the door open so that Kat would know I was here.
I was packing up my bag when movement by the door caught my attention. Any excitement that I might have had was quickly deflated when my eyes locked with Anika’s as she came sashaying into the room like a predator ready to pounce on prey.
I sighed, “Anika, is there something I can help you with?”
Her lips curled upward as she spoke in a sickly sweet voice, “I just wanted to see how you were doing after that. Seems like you had a rough night.”
My brows furrowed, “I’m fine. It’s not a big deal.”
She moved to stand in front of me with a look of concern, “Are you sure? You seemed pretty upset out there. I thought maybe we could go grab some dinner and talk about it.”
Fuck. Here we go. I gave her a tight lipped smile, “That’s nice of you to offer, but I’m waiting for Kat.”
She gasped, seeming shocked. “Really? Well, I saw Kat leave.”
My face fell. There was no hiding my disappointment. I realized maybe I was an idiot for hoping. The hurt and pain at that realization settled into my chest and squeezed hard. Anika moved in closer, placing her hand on my arm. I stared at it, not really sure how to react.
“You know, we could just go back to my place and hang out…if you need a distraction.”
Her hand began to slide up my arm just as I raised my head to meet her gaze, “Huh?”
She was smiling again as her hand settled on the back of my neck, “You know, something to take your mind off things…off Kat. I can make you dinner…or do other things…”
There were a few seconds that I actually considered the offer - suddenly craving the rush and distraction I knew it would give me, but I quickly dismissed it because I’m no longer that person. I gave her a crooked smile and laughed nervously, tilting my head back as she suddenly leaned in, her hand pulling my head forward as she crashed her lips against mine. Everything about it felt so wrong. I honestly felt like I was going to be sick as I pushed her away just in time to see Kat’s back walking toward the exit.
“Fuck,” I huffed out in frustration. “You know what Anika, I’ve tried being nice and letting you down easy…but I’m just gonna say it. I’m not interested. Not now. Not ever. So, I’m going to need you to leave this room and never step foot in it again.”
She scoffed, “Geez, you don’t have to be such an asshole about it.”
I let out a humorless laugh, “Well, you’ve caught me at a bad time, and you just royally fucked things up for me. So imma need you to go. Now.”
I watched her stomp out of the room. Once she was gone, I ran toward the exit to find Kat, but she was nowhere in sight. I leaned back against the exterior wall, trying my hardest to keep it together. There was no coming back from this and I knew it. I knew how that had to look. Kat would never believe anything I had to say.
An hour later, I found myself seated at the bar of a local tavern, staring at a full tumbler sitting between my hands. I was officially at the end of my rope and heading for a spiral if I didn’t pull it together within the next few minutes. As I moved to take a sip from the glass, someone sat down beside me.
“I really hope I’m not about to witness Dieter Bravo fall off the wagon.”
I paused just before putting the glass to my lips and turned to find the last person I ever expected sitting beside me. Lana. She had a sly smile on her face as she eyed me.
“I know you had a bad night, but I promise that shitshow is not worth compromising yourself over.”
My lips tugged upward as I sat the glass down, I couldn’t help it. “It’s ironic that you’re the one coming to my rescue. You’re not trying to fuck me too, are you?”
She snorted out a laugh, “Absolutely not. What kind of person do you take me for? I’m not a cheater.”
There was something almost sarcastic in her tone. It took me by surprise. “Speaking of cheaters, where’s Alec? Do I need to be concerned about my safety?”
Her face fell slightly, “No, you don’t need to worry about that. Not tonight. I’m sure he’s off fucking someone else for the evening, which suits me just fine. He’s a shitty lay.”
I chuckled, “Yeah, I’ve heard. So, all is not well in paradise I take it?”
Lana rolled her eyes, “It was never paradise. I’m just doing the job I was hired to do. As soon as the show’s over, I’m heading to London for filming with hopes of never laying eyes on Alec Balaska again.”
I never thought it possible, but Lana Thompson officially had my full attention. My drink was forgotten as I turned to face her fully, “What do you mean the job you were hired to do?”
She had a grin on her face that could rival the Cheshire cat, “Dieter, surely you know there are strings being pulled behind the scenes?”
I nodded, “Of course, but I don’t actually know the details…”
The bartender came by, and Lana took a moment to ask for a glass of water, which shocked me. Then she turned to me, leaning in slightly before she spoke.
“Obviously you can’t breathe a word of this to anyone because if Alec finds out…well…I’d rather not be on the receiving end of that. Anyway, there was a last minute scramble with casting when you insisted on being partnered with Kat. The only reason they let it happen was because I agreed to make moves to split Kat and Alec up. They paid me extra for it. I mean…fucking the guy wasn’t part of the deal, but it was the only way I could get any sway over him. I had originally planned the paparazzi pictures out, so he would look like the asshole and not Kat. I hadn’t planned on her seeing what she saw. I do actually feel like shit about that…”
I was stunned by this news. It was completely unexpected. “Why did you need him to look like the asshole?”
She chuckled, “Isn’t it obvious? They wanted to clear the way for you and Kat to get together without any backlash. You two are the fan favorites this season. It was apparent from the first week. They’re giving the audience what they want…a love story where the underdog gets his shit together and gets the girl, along with amazing dancing. The way I see it, I did you two a favor. I was happy to do it too. Kat deserves better than what she had. He was an asshole to her.”
I stared at her for a beat, trying to process everything she was saying. I should probably be mad over the lengths Stacia and Joe were going to in order to manipulate us all, but I couldn’t be. The chance to have Kat in my life was a win in my book, but I had totally fucked it up.
“So, you're OK being labeled a homewrecker then?” I asked.
She gave me a sad smile, “You know how it is, especially when your career is on the downward slope…even bad press is good press. Besides, if anyone cares to ask me…he told me that he and Kat were over. How was I supposed to know he was lying?”
She shrugged with a mischievous glint in her eye. I laughed, “Ahh, well played then.”
The bartender set the glass of water down in front of Lana. She took a small sip before turning her attention back to me. “So, what’s going on with you and Kat? From the looks of it after New York, I thought everything was going well.”
I sighed, “I’m not even really sure. She asked to put a pause on things until the show is over. I guess it was too much, too fast. I mean, we did just kind of jump into it. She sort of insinuated that she’s having a hard time with my past, like maybe…she doesn’t trust that I’ve fully changed. I thought she was the one person who was giving me a fair shot, ya know? It really hurt to hear it from her. So, I guess we’re just trying to sort through our feelings.”
Lana’s lips set into a tight line, “Have you told her how you really feel though? Or are you being the typical idiot male and dancing around the topic of big feelings.”
My brows furrowed, “Excuse me?”
She laughed, “Have you told her you love her?”
I blinked at her a few times, “Who ever said that I’m…”
She rolled her eyes, “Fucking hell. Both of you are idiots. It’s obvious. Everyone can see it. You both do a shit job at hiding it.”
I puffed air out of my cheeks, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’ve been told that a couple of times…But to answer your question…yes. I sort of told her in the middle of my meltdown earlier this week. It wasn’t my best moment. I admit, the delivery could have been better.”
Her perfectly sculpted brow arched, “And? What did she say?”
I laughed humorlessly, “She didn’t really say anything. She just stared at me.”
She snickered, “You two really are idiots...Look, it probably took her off guard. Stunned her a bit…especially if her head is a mess of emotions. I’ll be honest, I don’t know how bad things got between her and Alec, but I do know she was making him go to therapy, anger management, and AA meetings. Now, he wasn’t actually going because he doesn’t care enough to fix himself…but if she was making him do all that, I know it had to be bad. They were together for a long time. Being with someone like that for that long…it’s a serious mind fuck. It makes you doubt yourself…doubt your worth. I’ve been where she’s at, so I get it. I don’t think it’s so much about you not changing as it is about her feeling like she’s not enough to make you happy. And when addicts aren’t happy…what do they do? Go back to old habits. She’s been made to feel like she’s a burden and unworthy of being loved…like she’s the problem. I don’t really know anything about your past, but given your chosen coping mechanisms, I’d wager that you know a thing or two about that?”
I nodded, letting her words settle in. I hadn’t really considered things from this angle even though I should have given my past. It somehow made the hurt I was feeling less painful because I realized Kat was hurting in her own way too. In a way that I completely understood. After talking with Evan, I realized a lot of this was because of Alec, but I had been missing the most crucial parts.
“It’s possible that Kat is struggling to understand what she’s feeling. Being abused physically, emotionally…it really warps your sense of self. It’s confusing and it takes some time to work through. I think if you can be strong enough to give her the space to do that, she’ll come around. In the meantime, be there for her. Support her. Show her how you’re really feeling…don’t make it more complicated than it needs to be because at the end of the day…it has nothing to do with you.”
Fuck me. Lana was right. I was handling this completely wrong. I sat staring at the full tumbler in front of me again, suddenly feeling lost and unsure of how to proceed.
Lana took another sip of water before smiling, “You know…you probably don’t remember this. We worked on a movie together many moons ago. I was just starting out…playing a barista for one scene. I remember being completely repulsed by you that day…you were such a fucking ass.”
My gaze shifted back to her, my brows furrowing as I searched my memories. I shook my head, “I’m sorry, I don’t remember this...”
She laughed quietly, “No, I don’t think you would. I’m pretty sure you were stoned out of your mind. You told me to go get you a coffee during a break. I think you called me ‘sugar tits’ somewhere in the middle of that demand too? Then I told you to go fuck yourself. Another crude joke followed. You had completely forgotten about the interaction by the time the film was rolling again.”
I rubbed at the crease between my brows, “Yeah…I know I was a dick back then. I’m really sorry…”
She cut me off, “I’m not looking for an apology. My point is…I see you. I’ve been on the periphery of your spiral for years…I’ve seen it at parties, at award shows…you’re not that person anymore. Anyone who can’t see that is fucking blind or they just don’t care to. I can tell you’ve turned into a good person. Someone worthy of Kat, so don’t let those doubts get to you, OK?”
I felt a lump forming in my throat. Of all people, Lana fucking Thompson got it. The whole situation. I had to clear the lump before I could speak, “I actually appreciate that. Thank you.”
She smiled, “Now, Imma need you to go get your girl and fix this. Please. I’m a massive Dieterina Stan and I cannot stand to witness this mess any longer.”
I barked out a laugh but quickly sobered. “That may be easier said than done. I really fucked up tonight. I doubt she’s ever gonna speak to me again.”
Her brows knitted together, “What the fuck did you do now?”
I sighed, “Anika invited herself into my dressing room after the show and kissed me. The door was wide open, so I’m pretty sure Kat saw it. After I pushed Anika off, I saw Kat walking away.”
Lana gasped, “Fucking Anika. I swear she is nothing but trouble.” She shook her head, seeming deep in thought for a moment. “Look, just…do what I said. Kat will come around. I know it. This thing with Anika will sort itself out.”
I gave a dismissive laugh, “Yeah…I guess we’ll see about that.”
She gave me a pointed look, “Yeah, we will. Now…you need to get out of this place before it ends up all over TMZ tomorrow. As a matter of fact…”
She reached for the tumbler in front of me, then put it to her lips and took a big gulp of it. She jerked it away from her mouth as her face scrunched up in disgust, “Ugh, what the fuck is that?”
I shrugged as I held in my smile, “Cranberry juice.”
She gave me an admonishing look, “You could have warned me…and here I was thinking it was some sort of mixed cocktail.”
I snickered, “It wouldn’t have been funny if I told you.”
She shook her head, “You may be sober, but the chaos demon lives on…”
I couldn’t help it, I cackled over that. “Ehh, I’m more like a mischief maker these days. The chaos demon was my past life.”
She laughed as I stood from my seat. “Well, Lana, it’s been…an educational evening. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m happy I ran into you. Thank you.”
She gave me a genuine smile, “Anytime. Let me know if I can help with anything.”
I nodded, giving her a small wave as I made my exit.
I went home after that, feeling slightly better about things. If only the Anika thing hadn't happened. That was my biggest obstacle at the moment. I laid down on the sofa, welcoming Zee for a cuddle as I considered my options. Once she settled on my chest and began dozing off, I grabbed my phone. I had a text from Marc asking if I was doing OK after how things had gone tonight and offered his ear if I needed to talk. I appreciated the sentiment and told him as much, promising to get together to grab lunch or dinner soon so we could chat. It would be nice to have a distraction for a little while.
Then I opened Instagram. I was expecting the worst, but I actually had a lot of positive and encouraging comments from fans. It definitely helped the bad mood a little. Then I opened my DMs, realizing I had a message request from someone named Lydia Brown. I was intrigued, so I opened it.
“Hey Dieter, this is Kat’s sister. If you ever tell her I sent this, I will not speak to you again.
Anyway, I talked to her earlier right after the show aired. She’s kind of a mess right now, but I want you to know that she is in love with you. She told me as much. She just doesn't know how to process everything right now. Please don’t give up on her. She’s getting there.”
I huffed out a breath, “Yeah, and I bet you didn’t hear about my latest fuck up yet.”
I tossed my phone on the coffee table and wrapped my arms around Zee, scooting her up closer to my face so I could bury my nose in her fluffy fur. She groaned in protest but rolled over to rub her head against the scruff of my chin before she began purring.
I squeezed her a little tighter, “Don’t worry baby girl, Imma figure out how to get your momma back.”
Next: Week 10
✨ Here is a fun little Jazz video to go along with this depressing chapter that really didn’t focus on dancing at all. It was all about the angst this time. Sorry. 😬
A/N: Good afternoon/evening my lovelies! I hope you are doing well after all the angst. So much happened in this chapter worth discussing. Our sweet Dieter and Kat are struggling, but they are limping along and trying their best. Are we shocked they were even able to rehearse? Are we shocked they had a shitty performance?
Speaking of the performance, are we mad that Joe let Stacia fudged the bottom three results? Stacia obviously isn’t a fan of Alec…does that get her any brownie points? 😂
And then we got Evan and Lydia coming in for a save. Do we think they should be getting in the middle of all this? Also, I love Evan. I just needed to say that.
Now for the elephant in the room…Lana. How do we all feel about her now? Still hate her? Conflicted? Love her? I need to know your thoughts.
How do we think this is all going to play out? How is Dieter going to get his woman (and Zee’s momma 🥹) back after that whole Anika debacle?
Come scream at me about it all! I wanna know your thoughts.
Coming up in the next chapter…
I know the chapter title says it will be the Quickstep, but I may switch it up to the Lambada, just because. We shall see.
Kat gets scolded by her sister.
Kat tends to her plants with thoughts of Dieter on her mind.
Dieter does another Instagram live
Serious conversations are had
We finally find out what the song was that they danced the Viennese Waltz to
Lastly, In case you missed it... new fic in the works.
Closed Position Masterlist ||| Main Masterlist
Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)
Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble.
Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo.
Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.
Chapter Word Count: 10.6k
👉 Warnings: Themes dealing with intimate partner violence (not from Dieter), past alcohol abuse, and past drug abuse. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Dieter Bravo comes with his own warnings.
Chapter Quote:
"Did you…climb over the fucking fence?”
Kat’s POV
I burst through the building exit, dragging fresh air into my lungs as I struggled to breathe. Standing on stage with Dieter and being placed in the bottom three had really messed me up. We could have been voted off after that abhorrently shitty performance without any reason to see each other beyond this night. It would have been the end of everything. The dancing. Us. Except, there was no us because I had royally fucked it all up. I knew that now. I also knew what I felt for him was real. I wouldn’t have had such a visceral reaction to the possibility of never seeing him again if it wasn’t.
I leaned against the rough brick of the building, taking deep breaths and exhaling slowly to get my emotions under control as I thought through what to do next. I needed to fix this, but I didn’t know where to start. I didn’t know how to make him understand the crippling fear that had taken over every cell of my body, causing me to behave the way I had toward him.
My phone vibrated in my hand, pulling me from my thoughts. It was my sister calling. I wasn’t shocked, figuring she had just watched the live show. With trembling hands, I swiped to answer.
“Lyd, I was just about to…”
“What the hell did you do, Kat?” she interrupted.
I sighed. She knew. Of course she knew. “What do you mean?” I asked.
“Last time I talked to you, you were spazzing out about him and talking about putting on the breaks. So, what did you do?”
I rubbed at the throbbing pain between my brows, “I fucked up, Lyd. I really did. I’ve gotta fix it. I asked for a pause, just so I could untangle the thoughts in my head. He didn’t take it well at all. The day he had that outburst in the studio…I followed him outside. He told me he was in love with me, and I just stood there. I fucking stood there and didn’t say anything back even though I wanted to. I’ve broken him twice in the last two weeks…in the worst ways possible…and I don’t know how to fix it.”
Lydia let out a controlled breath, “Oh, Kat. I don’t even know what to say. Why didn’t you call me? I could have talked you off the ledge.”
I shook my head, “I-I dunno. I was spiraling hard. I let it go too far. I’ve hurt him badly.”
She sighed, “You need to talk to him. Tell him everything you’re feeling. He may understand better than you think.”
I scoffed, “I’ve tried explaining it to him and all I managed to do was make things worse. I dunno how to do this.”
“Well, you need to figure it out. Fast. You two won’t make it through another week like that. It was obvious something was wrong tonight.”
I groaned, “You’re right. I’m just…” I shook my head to clear it, “I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna go in there and tell him that I’m in love with him too. I just need him to be patient with me. That’s it.”
“It’s a start. Just…don’t hold back anymore. OK? He deserves everything because he’s giving you everything. Meet him where he’s at and it’ll all work out.”
I puffed air out of my cheeks, “Yeah. You’re right. I’m gonna go talk to him now. I’ll call you later this week.”
“Good. And Kat?”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t forget to breathe. I’m sure he’s just as nervous about this as you are. Remember that. Good luck.”
“Thanks, Lyd.”
I ended the call, taking one last calming breath before turning to go back inside the building. I walked with trepidation down the hallway, rehearsing in my head what I wanted to say but still fearing he wouldn’t want to speak to me. When I reached the open doorway to his dressing room, the sight I found stopped me in my tracks. He was smiling down at Anika as she leaned in and planted a kiss right on his mouth.
A mixture of hurt and rage fizzled in my chest as I turned on my heel and made a beeline for my dressing room, slamming the door shut behind me and locking it. I sank to the floor, sobbing into the tops of my knees. How could I have been so stupid? Of course he hadn’t changed. He was already moving on and back to his playboy ways. At least I saw it with my own eyes before giving myself over to him completely.
The following morning, I awoke with my stomach in knots. I wasn’t sure if I could face him. Not after seeing him with Anika and definitely not with Stacia and Joe in the room. I was trying to think about anything but Dieter as I gathered my things to leave. My phone pinged in my hand, just as I grabbed my keys on the way toward the car.
Dieter: I’m not gonna make it to the production meeting. My therapist is threatening to call in a wellness check if I don’t come see her first thing this morning. Sorry to leave you to deal with Stacia and Joe alone.
I sighed, half in relief and half in disgust. The reprieve was nice, but I couldn’t help questioning if he was being honest in his reasoning. For all I knew, he was shacked up somewhere with Anika giving her the best sex of her life. The thought caused me to cringe as I pulled the door shut behind me and got in the car. Once I was buckled in, I inhaled deeply and replied.
Me: It’s fine. That’s more important. Maybe we should just take the day to regroup anyway? Start fresh tomorrow?
Now it seemed the roles were reversed. The thought of seeing him after last night hurt too much. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it. Truth be told, the thought of dropping out crossed my mind a couple of times as I tossed and turned in bed this morning.
I watched the little bubbles bounce, then stop. That happened several times before his reply finally came through.
Dieter: I was hoping we could talk today.
I scoffed, “OH. Now you wanna talk?”
Did he know that I saw him with Anika? Is that why he wanted to talk? Or maybe he wanted to tell me before I found out from someone else. My mind was racing, a million thoughts in a matter of seconds. I didn’t know how to handle this. The betrayal felt much worse than anything Alec ever did to me. I chewed on the inside of my cheek, typing.
Me: We can talk tomorrow. I need a day.
Dieter: Ok. Tomorrow then. Please.
I huffed in frustration. Please. He definitely wanted to talk to me about Anika. That one little word seemed to be pissing me off more than I already was. I didn’t really have any right to be mad at him though. Technically, we weren’t together. But fucking Anika? Of all people? It made me sick.
It took every ounce of strength I had to compose myself for the meeting with Stacia and Joe. Luckily, Lenny called ahead to let them know Dieter had an appointment that he couldn’t miss, so it took some of the heat off. Things started off well enough, breezing through the details regarding our performance for this week. They had us doing the fucking Lambada. If they thought the Jazz performance was bad, then the Lambada was going to be nothing short of a train wreck. I had to work double time to control my facial reaction to that news.
I had hoped that would be the end of it, but they couldn’t help interrogating me about the obvious tension this past week. “Can you fill us in on what was going on with Dieter? Why did he have an outburst like that?” Stacia asked.
I shrugged, “Like I said, we’re old. We’re tired. Everyone has good and bad days when we rehearse this much. You should know that above anyone.”
“You’re sure there’s nothing going on with you two? Because that seemed like more than just being tired. If there is, we need to nip it now. Another performance like that and you two are out.”
I sighed, “And so what if we are? Why are you so worried about it? Aren’t you supposed to be unbiased about the contestants?”
Stacia’s nostrils flared, “We are. However, we do have to take ratings and promotion into consideration, as well. You two are a major draw. Especially when it comes to social media attention.”
I huffed out a laugh, shaking my head. “Well, if they like us so fucking much, maybe they’ll have pity and vote to keep us around. Are we done here?”
Joe rubbed at his temples, “Kat, we’re actually on your side here. We’re not the bad guys. We do wanna help.”
My jaw clenched, “There’s nothing to help. We had an off week. That’s it. Now, I’d appreciate it if you would stop prying and meddling.”
He pursed his lips before nodding. Surrendering, for now. I stood, giving them a forced smile as I turned to exit the conference room, feeling hot from the adrenaline brought on by the experience. When I entered the lobby, I stepped into the small alcove where the vending machines were tucked away, in search of something to drink. I found myself suddenly missing my usual morning cup of Dieter provided coffee, causing my heart to clench in my chest. Everything reminded me of him now.
I stood, taking in the selection when the sound of hushed voices carried through the wall of ferns separating the seating area from the alcove.
“So, I heard Dieter blew you off last night?” one voice asked.
A scoff, “How the hell did you find out about that?” It was Anika.
An amused reply, “A little birdy told me.” I couldn’t make out who this voice belonged to, but it sounded familiar.
“Fucking hell. Nobody can keep their mouths shut around here.”
A chuckle, “So. What happened?”
“Ugh, fine. I’d rather you know the truth than hear whatever people are saying. So, after the show was over, I noticed Dieter’s dressing room door was open. After that performance, it was obvious he and Kat were on the outs, so I thought I’d take advantage of the situation. Anyway, I went in and asked him out. He said he was waiting for Kat. I had seen Kat leave, so I told him that. He looked…I dunno, like, annoyed about it? So, I offered to…let him come back to my place. I really thought he was considering it. He seemed receptive, so I kissed him. He turned into the biggest asshole after that. Basically, told me to fuck off and said he wasn’t interested. He wasn’t nice about it. It was very hurtful the way he said it. Like I was the asshole or something.”
A sense of relief washed over me. He hadn’t done anything wrong. It was all her.
The other voice snorted out a laugh, “You know Dieter isn’t the same person anymore, right? He’s changed. He’s not into partying and one-night stands. He’s in love with Kat.”
Ankia scoffed, “Dieter Bravo doesn’t fall in love. He’s Hollywood’s biggest fuck boy.”
“He used to be. He’s sober now. That’s not his life anymore and the fact that you can’t see or respect that does make you the asshole. You need to lay off him. It's disrespectful to Kat.”
Anika gasped, taken aback by that statement. “Why are you so worried about Kat all of a sudden? You feeling guilty for fucking her fiancé now?”
My mouth dropped open in shock. The other voice was Lana. This whole conversation had my heart racing out of my chest. A nervous sweat was now dripping down my back as I stood staring at the vending machine, unmoving.
Lana chuckled, “No. No guilt at all. I did Kat a favor. Alec is an asshole. She deserved better. Besides, you know how this show works. I’m only doing what I’ve been paid to do. That’s why I’m here alone. Stacia and Joe want an update on what I know. I’m happy to say that Alec Balaska will be nothing but an afterthought as soon as the season is over.”
It took everything in me to hold in the maniacal laughter that was bubbling in my chest. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Lana fucking Thompson, of all people, had just made my day and saved my relationship with Dieter.
Before I even registered what I was doing, my feet carried me around the wall of ferns. I paused, staring at Lana with wide eyes, mouth still agape from the news. I vaguely registered Anika jumping slightly from my appearance, mumbling out an, “oh shit,” under her breath. My focus, however, was solely on Lana. She sat confidently with her legs crossed and a shit-eating grin on her face. She knew I was there the entire time.
She stood, approaching me with a friendly smile. “I need you to know that everything I just said was true…and I’m sorry. Even if my intentions were good, I know it was still hard on you. I’ve known guys like Alec my entire life and I know the kind of power they can have over you. I needed you to see who he really was. Regardless of what happens with Dieter, you needed to be freed from Alec.”
I could feel tears prickling behind my eyes. She wasn’t wrong. It was going to take something major to wake me up to who he really was. She gave me that.
I nodded, “Thank you. I mean it. I do need to ask you for one more favor though.”
Her brows arched, “Name it.”
I smirked, “Fuck him up good. Please?”
She gave me a toothy grin, “Already planned on it.”
My smile matched hers as she pulled me in for a tight hug. She held it for a beat, then pulled away.
“Now, go get your man. I can’t handle you two fighting anymore.”
I chuckled, “I’ll try.”
I went home after that. I needed to clear my head and process the events of the day. I also needed to figure out what I was going to do about Dieter. The fear was still there scratching at the door that I was frantically trying to shut in that part of my brain. I wanted to believe that what he felt was real. Everyone else seemed to think it was. They could all see it, so why couldn’t I?
I took a page out of Dieter’s book, moving through the house to tend to my plants in the way he had taught me. Pruning. Dusting. Misting. I could see why he enjoyed it. There was a certain mindless numbness that went along with the process. It was a good mental reset. Almost like meditation. Hours passed before I realized it. As I finished up, I considered what Lydia said about watching our videos on YouTube. I had just settled on the idea of doing it when my phone started blowing up with notifications. They were from Lydia. I didn’t even get a chance to read the text because she started calling. Concerned, I answered immediately.
“Lyd? Everything OK?”
She was breathless with excitement, “Please tell me your fucking watching this?”
I huffed out a nervous laugh, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Instagram live! Dieter! I swear to God Kat, if you don’t marry that man, I will.”
I snorted, “And how does your husband feel about that?”
“He’d probably officiate it... HOLY. SHIT. Kat! He has…you just need to watch it. He just ended it. Fuck. You need to see it. I might cry.”
I didn’t know how to respond. She sounded like she was having a meltdown on the other end of the line.
I sighed, “What the hell are you going on about?”
She let out the most ridiculous squeal, prompting me to pull the phone away from my ear.
“It’s on his story. GO WATCH IT. NOW. Call me when you’re done.”
I sighed, “Ok. Ok. Just stop screeching. Please.”
“Ok. Bye.”
The line went dead.
I looked at my phone, “What the actual fuck?”
Butterflies formed in the pit of my stomach. I could not comprehend what he could’ve done to have her acting like this. It actually freaked me out a little. When I opened Instagram, I had hundreds of notifications from where I had been tagged in the comments of his video.
I groaned, “Oh god. Dieter what did you do?”
I was hesitant to click on his story, inhaling a deep breath before taking the plunge. When the video began to play, Dieter was fiddling with the camera angle. He finally settled it where he wanted, then picked up his acoustic guitar. His sad eyes scanned the screen as he nervously chewed on his lip. Once the viewer numbers began to rise, he smiled and welcomed them. The smile didn’t reach his eyes. It hurt to see him like that.
As he tuned the guitar, I took in the rest of him. He looked tired. His hair was a mess of fluffy curls, hanging down over his forehead. I ached to run my fingers through them. He was wearing one of his favorite threadbare t-shirts, covering tense shoulders. I wanted to hug the tension away. When he looked back up at the camera, his bottom lip appeared swollen from his teeth. I wanted to kiss away his pain. Fuck. I missed him.
Once he had the guitar tuned to his liking, he smiled into the camera. “I promised you all I’d do more of these, so here we are. I feel like I need it today. I’ve got some things that I…I dunno…wanna get off my chest. I guess.”
He plucked a few chords, finding his rhythm. As he did this, my eyes were drawn to several new paintings leaning against the wall in the background. I couldn’t make out what they were since they partially covered each other, but the colors were different. Brighter. It wasn’t his usual style.
He paused, staring into my soul through the screen before taking a centering breath. Then he began to play, strumming a sad melody that I wasn’t familiar with. His eyes were distant, almost melancholy as his mind drifted to another place. He began to sing the lyrics in his low raspy voice, making my skin break out in goosebumps almost immediately.
🎶Listen HERE.
Hey, can you show me how to make it back
cause I’m still tryin to find my way home
Hey, can you take my hand keep me on track
make sure I never ever ever let it go
I would let the stars fade to nothing, nothing
If I knew that I’d always have your lovin, lovin
You're my gravity, you're holding me down
You're the reason that my life’s turned around
And in the moments that I’m hopeless
I’m just hoping I can hold on to you, hold onto you
I gasped quietly, eyes prickling with tears as I took in the meaning of the words he was putting out for the world to hear. I knew Dieter. He always chose songs with intention. He was holding nothing back, laying his soul bare to get through to me. I could see it in his eyes; he meant every syllable of what he was saying. Seeing him like this, putting every emotion into his words was melting the thin protective barrier that had formed around my heart.
The voice in my head
my thoughts before bed
You’re the reason that my heart beat slows
To keep pace with my mind
and the rhythm of time
that never seems to grow old
I would let the stars fade to nothing, nothing
If I knew that I’d always have your lovin, lovin
You're my gravity, you're holding me down
You're the reason that my life’s turned around
And in the moments that I’m hopeless
I’m just hoping I can hold on to you, hold on
The tears streamed down my face. There was no holding them back as his voice wrapped my body in heat, warming me to my core. I had never seen or heard anything so beautiful in my life, and he was mine. If I opened myself up the way he was for me. I could feel my resolve crumbling.
His voice rose in volume for the next verse, emphasizing the emotion behind the words. It was gravelly and rough, sending shivers down my spine and making me want him more than I had ever wanted anything in my life.
Oh I’d break my heart a million times
just so I could spend my nights with you
No need for us to rush
I’d find every reason to make it through
He paused the strumming of his guitar, voice quieting to a velvety tone to finish it out.
Cause you're my gravity, you're holding me down
You’re the reason that my life’s turned around
And in the moments that I’m hopeless
I’m just hoping I can hold on to you, hold on to you.
He played the last few notes, allowing them to quietly fade. His voice was gone, but the warmth in my body continued as a fire smoldered inside my heart. It was burning with everything that had been holding me back. He had finally broken through, and it was quickly turning into a blaze.
His eyes were glassy as he looked into the camera, biting the inside of his cheek. Then Zee appeared, jumping up onto his shoulder in that way she does - curling her body around him as she bumped her head against his. He turned, giving her a sad smile and scratched under her chin as he mumbled, “Hey, babygirl.”
He sighed, turning back to the camera. His brows pinched together as he spoke, “We miss you.”
As if on cue, Zee turned to the camera and meowed loudly, like she was agreeing. Dieter chuckled quietly, giving her another scratch on the chin before reaching to shut off the stream. As he did so, the camera tilted upward. It was only the briefest glimpse before it disconnected, but it was long enough for me to pause it to see a new painting hanging on the wall.
The painting showed the bare backside of a woman from the waist up. Her hands sat on her head, holding her dark hair in a pile and exposing her neck. The background was mostly bright red, with swirls of black, white, and a deep green color. Her spine curved slightly, posed mid movement. Defined contours of muscles showed in the shadows. My breath caught in my throat when my attention was drawn to the obvious DB scrawled in the bottom corner. It was his painting. Is that a painting of…me?
My tears quickly turned to sobs. This man had somehow managed to make me feel every emotion imaginable in the last twenty-four hours and I couldn’t even be mad about it. If anything, I wanted more. I wanted him. And I wanted him to have all of me. I was ready to take the risk. To fall for him completely. I trusted him with my fragile heart because this was real. For both of us. I knew that now.
A text came through from my sister, interrupting my emotional breakdown.
Lydia: Did you watch it yet?
I chuckled, then typed out my response with trembling fingers.
Me: Yes. I’ve been so stupid.
Lydia: No. You just needed time. Go to him. Tell him. Or else I’m gonna come kick your ass.
I snorted, sending her a thumbs up. I took a moment to gather myself, then opened his story again. This time, watching the comments fly by.
“This is for @dancerkatstamos, right?”
“OMG, is Kat watching? @dancerkatstamos look!”
“This has to be for @dancerkatstamos. I won’t accept any other explanation!”
“He’s breaking my heart! @dancerkatstamos give him another chance!”
And on and on it went. Everyone seemed to know the truth before I did. It made me feel ridiculous that I had been so up my ass about this whole thing and that I had hurt Dieter so terribly in the process. I wouldn’t blame him if he refused to forgive me.
It took me a few minutes to pull myself together. Then, I got in the car and drove to Dieter’s house. I had mixed emotions the whole way, alternating between being so nervous I felt sick and giddy at the thought of reconciling. I wanted this to be over ASAP.
When I got there, I marched up to the door and knocked. The lights were on, but I saw no movement inside. I tried the handle, but it was locked. I sighed, pulling out my phone to call. It went to voicemail. Three times. I was feeling beyond impatient to get this over with before I lost my nerve.
I groaned, “Damnit Dieter. Figures you would be unreachable right now…”
I moved to peek through the side window, allowing me to look through the kitchen into the backyard where the firepit was burning. Assuming he was there, I made my way around to the gate only to find that it too was locked. The sound of muffled classical music drifted over from the other side of the privacy fence. I puffed air out of my cheeks, now feeling frustrated. And determined. I looked around, finding the trash can sitting next to the house.
“Ah, fuck it.”
I knew it was a bad idea as soon as I thought of it, but that didn’t stop me from dragging the full trash can over and climbing on top of it. It allowed me to see over the top of the fence. I spotted Dieter immediately, lying in a lounger toward the far end of the yard. He was facing the ocean, watching the sunset. I tried yelling for him, but he didn’t hear me.
I hoisted myself up on top of the stone wall and threw my legs over, “Ugh, this seems a lot higher than I realized…”
After a centering breath, I twisted to carefully lower myself down. Not that it did any good because I lost my grip and fell into the shrubbery below with a loud, “Ooof.”
I couldn’t help snorting out a laugh as I stood, pulling leaves from my hair and brushing dirt from my clothes. I glanced up, Dieter hadn’t moved. He obviously couldn’t hear anything over the music. I stumbled toward him, still brushing dirt away. I must have startled him, because he jumped as I walked around to stand in front of him. He sat up straighter, taking his sunglasses off before reaching to turn down the Bluetooth speaker next to him.
“What the fuck, Kat?”
He turned toward me, eyes scanning from head to toe. “How did you…Why do you have leaves in your hair?” He looked toward the house, then back to me. “Did you…climb over the fucking fence?”
I grimaced, “Yes. I tried calling. I’m sorry, I couldn’t wait. We need to talk.”
He snorted, “I do have a doorbell, ya know? I can hear it out here on the speaker.”
My face heated, “Uhhh, I didn’t think about that.”
His face softened, “Are you OK? Did you fall?”
I nodded, feeling embarrassed. “The only thing injured is my dignity.”
He chuckled, letting it trail off to a few seconds of silence. His face shifted, his brows furrowing as his body tensed. “I thought you wanted to wait until tomorrow? What changed?”
I chewed on my lip, searching for the right words. “I can’t let another day go by like this. We need to talk.”
He nodded, “Look, about last night. It’s not what you think. I didn’t…”
I held up my hand to stop him, “I know. I know it was Anika. I’m not mad about that.”
His shoulders relaxed, “How do you know?”
I huffed out a laugh, “The craziest thing happened after the production meeting this morning. I overheard Lana asking Anika about it. Anika admitted that she pursued you and you blew her off.”
A wide grin spread across Dieter’s face, “I think I need to send Lana a fruit basket or something. She’s two for two.”
My brows pinched together, “What does that mean?”
He relaxed in the lounger, “She talked some sense into me last night, helped me understand things from your point of view. It seems she's been working behind the scenes to do Stacia and Joe’s bidding, but she’s also a closet Dieterina supporter.”
I was shocked to hear they had talked, but I couldn’t be upset about it. She had brought us together. Twice. I smiled, “So, you must be the little birdy that told her about Anika?”
He nodded, “Yeah, we discussed it.”
I closed the distance between us, sitting on the edge of his seat - angling my body so I could look at him. The mood shifted to something more serious as the air thickened around us.
“I saw your Instagram Live.”
He stared out toward the water with a pensive look on his face, “I meant every word I said.”
He paused, finally turning to meet my gaze.
“I’m afraid too, ya know. I’m afraid that you’re finally gonna wake up and realize I’m not worthy of you. Afraid of fucking up because that’s all I know how to do. And…I’m afraid of how strong my feelings are for you. You’re entangled in my soul now. No one has ever had this kind of hold on me. I am in love with you. I’ve never said those words to anyone, not even my parents. So, it does mean something when I say it. I wasn’t even sure I was capable of it until the second you bumped into me.”
He reached for my hand, squeezing it gently before continuing.
“All of that scares the hell out of me, but I’m willing to push through it. You’re my world now, Kat. And I swear I’ll do everything in my power to make you happy. I may have some fuck ups, but I can guarantee my past problems are in the past. I’m done with all that. Whatever was broken inside of me…you’ve fixed it. I’m a better person because of you.”
I was crying again, holding back a sob as I nodded. “I believe you.”
He held his arms open, motioning for me to come to him. I didn’t hesitate, shifting to straddle his hips so I could hug him tightly against me. I buried my nose in his hair, deeply inhaling his scent. It was like a balm on my soul, slowly washing away all my fear and doubt.
I sighed into his curls, “I’m sorry I hurt you. It wasn’t my intention. I should’ve talked to you instead of getting in my head about it. I’m willing to try. I want you to have all of me. I promise I won’t hold back anymore. I trust you and…I feel safe with you. All I ask is that you be patient with me. I’m there with you, OK? Know that.”
He pulled away, cupping my cheeks as he peered up at me with tears in his eyes and a smile. “I’ll let you lead. I don’t plan to ever dance with anyone else. You’re it for me. If that’s what it takes, then you lead… and I’ll follow.”
I smiled, getting emotional all over again. More tears spilled out, but these were happy tears. Relief flooded my system after he closed the distance between us and pressed his lips to mine. It was tentative and soft as he hugged me closer to him. I had missed this, missed him so much.
We broke apart, our eyes roaming each other’s faces and taking in the moment. He spoke first. “Can we never fight like this again? Please? It was torture.”
I smirked, “I agree, I don't like it either. However, there may be one positive thing to come from it…”
He reached to pull a leaf from my hair, flicking it away with a small smile. Then his brows furrowed, “Like what?”
My lips curled upward, running my hands up his chest then around to rest at the back of his neck. “Like make up sex…”
His eyes widened, “Oh…”
I felt him harden under me almost instantly. He snorted out a laugh against my neck as he pulled me against him.
“Well, that definitely escalated quickly. It seems little Dieter has missed you too.”
I giggled against the top of his head, “Don’t worry, he’ll get taken care of. But…there is something I wanna do first. Can we go inside?”
He pulled away, giving me an uneasy smile. “Should I be concerned?”
I laughed, shaking my head. “No. Definitely not.”
I led him inside, up the stairs to his Sanctuary. He stopped in the doorway, leaning against the frame to watch me. I picked up the acoustic guitar he had been playing earlier and took a seat in his leather chair, making a point not to look at his new painting. Because if I did, I wouldn’t be able to keep it together for this.
He walked into the room, grabbed a throw pillow, and threw it on the floor. He sat down on the cushion, pulling his knees to his chest as he peered up at me with questioning eyes.
“Since you did a song for me earlier, it’s only fair. I think this might help you understand what sent me on a spiral…because it’s really what started it all.”
Dieter’s POV
I sat on the floor, watching Kat intently - intrigued as to what this was about. All the while my heart pounded out of my chest from the excitement of having her back home. For once, everything was working out in my favor, and I couldn’t have been happier about it. It was taking everything in me to sit still so Kat could have the moment she needed.
Kat nervously chewed on her bottom lip, adjusting the strings to her liking. Or possibly stalling, I couldn’t tell which. Either way, I sat patiently waiting. She rolled her lips together, inhaling deeply as she glanced at me one last time before her fingers began to pluck the chords. Her eyes shifted, focusing on something in the distance just over my shoulder.
The notes sounded familiar. However, I couldn’t place the song right away. But then she began to sing in a breathy raspy lower register that I had never heard from her before, making my skin tingle from head to toe. I knew the song instantly. It was the same song we had danced the Viennese Waltz to, right before everything fell apart. I stared at her in awe as she performed her version of the song, pouring emotion into every word.
🎶Listen HERE.
Sweet love, sweet love
trapped in your love
I've opened up, unsure I can trust
My heart and I were buried in dust
Free me, free us
You're all I need when I'm holding you tight
If you walk away, I will suffer tonight
I found a man I can trust
And boy, I believe in us
I am terrified to love for the first time
Can't you see that I'm bound in chains?
I've finally found my way
I am bound to you
I am bound to you
I knew I had to look like a fool, sitting there with my mouth gaping open, but I couldn’t help it. She was literally taking my breath away. I hugged my knees closer to my chest, resting my chin on them as I watched her. At some point, my eyes began to overflow with tears without me realizing it. There was a fluttering feeling in my chest unlike anything I had ever felt. She was connecting with me in a way she never had. After a brief instrumental bit, her eyes locked with mine as she went into the second verse.
So much, so young, I've faced on my own
Walls I built up became my home
I'm strong, and I'm sure there's a fire in us
Sweet love, so pure
I catch my breath with just one beating heart
And I brace myself, please don't tear this apart
If I hadn't been sitting down already, I would’ve needed to. The expressiveness in her voice and eyes were making me lightheaded. I could feel every word as they left her lips. Every perfect word that she was willingly giving to me to show me how she really felt.
Suddenly the moment's here
I embrace my fears
All that I have been carrying all these years
Do I risk it all? Come this far just to fall? Fall
I can trust and boy, I believe in us
I am terrified to love for the first time
Can't you see that I'm bound in chains?
And finally found my way
I am bound to you
I am, ooh, I am, I’m bound to you
By the time she hit the last verse, tears began to stream down her face. Her volume rose as the raw emotion poured out of her. Then her voice faded, finishing the song with a heavy sigh and sniffle. She huffed out a nervous laugh, wiping her cheeks. The only response I could muster was to crawl over to her, taking the guitar to lay on the floor before standing up on my knees and hugging her tightly against me.
She sobbed quietly against my shoulder, releasing whatever hurt it was she had been holding onto. My breathing was heavy as I worked to control my own emotions, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop my tears as I soothed her.
“I’m sorry I hurt you before, but I’m sure now. I’m sure,” she mumbled through a stuttered breath.
I sighed, “You don’t have to apologize. It’s OK. We’re OK now, and I’m still here. I always will be.”
She pulled back, her glossy red eyes dancing over my face for a beat before cupping my cheeks and pulling me in for a gentle kiss, pausing to murmur against my lips.
“I love you.” Another kiss. Then another, “I love you.”
I smiled, returning the kiss and the sentiment before shifting to stand. I pulled her upright with me, bending to wrap my arms around her waist. I lifted her, walking toward the bedroom while continuing to kiss her deeply as I went.
There wasn’t a second that our bodies were not touching as we undressed each other. We broke apart only briefly so that she could settle into the center of the bed. I trailed closely behind her, worshiping any bit of skin I could reach. She pulled me to hover above her, framing my hips with her thighs as we took each other in. Her amber colored eyes looked like honey flecked with melted gold in the warm glow of the setting sun coming in through the open windows. I wanted to drown in them. Her fingers scratched at the patchy stubble on my cheek before her thumb brushed across my lower lip. I dipped my chin slightly, gently kissing her palm.
She smiled, closing the distance between us. I lined myself up with her entrance, sinking in slowly. A low whimper bubbled up from my chest as her heat surrounded me. She gasped against my mouth as I filled her. Any remaining tension that lingered between us vanished as we found home in each other’s embrace.
We took it slowly, getting reacquainted. This time felt different. We were connecting on a much deeper level. Every touch. Every caress. Now expressing a new emotion that we openly shared with one another. I could feel it in the way she kissed me. I could see it in her eyes. There were no walls between us now. It was the most amazing feeling that I couldn’t begin to describe.
We moved as one, in a slow rhythm that was damn near maddening as we got lost in each other. It felt like time ceased to exist as the rest of the world faded away to nothing. All I could see and feel was her. It was transcendent, almost seeming too perfect to be real as we fell over the edge together - both of us professing our love in quiet whispers against the other's lips as we let the emotions swallow us whole. Our salty tears mingled as our lips continued to move against each other, riding out our high as long as we could.
When we finally broke apart, I pressed my forehead against hers as we tried to catch our breath. My body was trembling, making it hard for me to continue to hold myself up. I reluctantly pulled away with a grunt, moving to lay beside her. I gathered her in my arms as she wrapped herself around me.
I sighed, “I feel like I’m dreaming. I wasn’t expecting my day to end like this.”
She chuckled, “Yeah, me either to be honest. I’m not complaining though.”
She kissed me again, deeply. Her leg hooked around my hip as my hand drifted down her side, moving to gently squeeze her ass. She groaned, but it wasn’t a pleasurable sound. My brows furrowed as I sat up to look at her backside, finding a bruise the size of my palm on her cheek.
I couldn’t help chuckling as I shook my head at her, “How hard did you fall?”
She shrugged, “Hard enough to regret it later I suppose.”
“I can’t believe you did that. You’ve been around me too long. That’s some stupid shit I would’ve done.”
She smiled, “What can I say, I learned from the best.”
“I’m gonna go get you an ice pack. Don’t move.”
She squirmed, rubbing her thighs together. I arched a brow as she smiled mischievously.
“You’re insatiable, ya know that? Don’t worry Kitten, the night’s still young. I’m not done with you yet.”
That evening, we took turns making each other fall apart until neither of us could go any longer. After a soak in the tub, we collapsed in a heap on the bed. We were on the verge of nodding off when Zee started her loud caterwauling wail outside the bedroom door.
I sighed, “Fuck. I forgot to feed the kid.”
Kat snickered as I rolled out of the bed to open the door. Zee didn't’ waste any time, sprinting into the room and jumping on the bed to snuggle up to Kat - bumping her head against Kat’s chin while letting out low growls to show her displeasure of Kat’s absence.
I chuckled, “I get it Zee, I had the urge to rub all up on her, too.”
Kat snorted out a laugh into Zee’s fur.
“I’m gonna go make her dinner. I’ll be back.”
Just as I sat Zee’s plate down on her mat, Kat appeared in the kitchen. She gave Zee one last nuzzle before sitting her down next to her bowl.
“I couldn’t get her to leave. I was thirsty anyway.”
I chuckled, “I think she missed you almost as much as I did.”
I moved to the fridge, “You want water? Or something else?”
“Water’s fine.”
After handing her a cold bottle, I leaned against the counter watching her. She stood there in nothing but a T-shirt. My T-shirt. Guzzling the water down like she had just run a marathon. When she finished, she offered me the bottle but I shook my head, getting lost in my thoughts. I wanted to tell her more about my meeting with Lana.
“I should probably tell you where I ran into Lana last night…I don’t want you to think I’m keeping anything from you.”
Her brows furrowed, her jaw flexing as she nodded for me to continue.
“I was…at a bar.”
Her eyes widened, but she didn’t say anything.
I inhaled a centering breath, “I was alone. I didn’t order any alcohol, but I thought about it. I had just talked myself out of it when Lana sat down next to me. She came over to talk me out of a bad decision.”
Kat nodded, “Thank you for telling me…” She sat the bottle of water down, coming to stand at my side. “What made you wanna go?”
I pursed my lips, considering my answer. “I think…it was the thing with Anika. I felt like I fucked up. Badly. I saw you walking away after she kissed me. I knew it hurt you to see that. So, I let my self-hatred and negative thinking run away with me for a minute, but I pulled back. I didn’t wanna ruin everything that I’ve worked toward. And not just with you, but my career…and my life. I can never go back to what I was before, no matter what happens. No matter how bad things get…I just can’t.”
She surprised me with a small smile. “I’m proud of you for telling me and admitting that you had a weak moment. I know it takes a certain amount of growth to be able to do that. I mean, it’s part of recovery. Weak moments are gonna happen.”
I huffed out a sigh of relief as she grabbed my arm and pulled me into a tight embrace.
“I was worried you would be upset over it.”
She pulled back, “I’m sad you felt the urge for it, but I know it happens. That’s why it’s important for you to have support and to feel like you can reach out when you need to. You need people you feel safe with during those vulnerable moments, and you have them now. And you’re being completely open and honest about it all. That’s why I know I don’t need to worry. You’re doing everything right. And we’re gonna do this together. Never be afraid to tell me if you’re struggling. I can only fault you if you lie about it.”
I felt like bursting into tears, “I really don’t deserve you.”
She scoffed, “Yes you do. You deserve to be happy just like everyone else.”
I smiled, cupping her cheeks and giving her a soft kiss on the lips.
“Let’s go get some rest. We’re gonna have a busy day tomorrow.”
I took her hand and led her upstairs. Halfway up, Zee ran past us, beating us to bed.
Then I snuggled up with both my ladies and had the best night of sleep I had had in nearly two weeks. Everything was finally right in the world again.
The next morning, Kat and I were at the dance studio before the doors were unlocked. Having already lost a day of rehearsal, we were worried but determined to be back in the top scores. The competition was down to five couples this week. If we wanted to win, we had zero room for error from this point on.
As we went through our stretching routine, Kat got me up to speed on this week’s performance.
“I’ll be honest, I’m nervous about this one. The Lambada is not one that I have a lot of experience with. It’s not been done on the show since 2009 and there’s only been three couples to do it.”
My brows furrowed, “Why?”
She shrugged, “I have no idea. Something about the format of the show. I’m not sure the judges were huge fans either. This dance though…we're either gonna knock it out of the park with your loose hips or we’re going down with an epic failure.”
I cringed, “That sounds encouraging.”
She stood, then pulled me up with her. “We may have an advantage though.”
I huffed out a laugh, “Oh yeah? What’s that?”
She smiled mischievously, “We don’t have a problem getting up close and personal with each other. We also already have a lot of practice with the hip thrusting.”
I couldn’t help it. I cackled.
She laughed, “I’m just calling it as I see it.”
I moved to stand in front of her, awaiting instruction.
“We also have a very strong connection, which is to our benefit too. This is a Latin dance with a lot of movement. It has elements of the Salsa, Samba, and Merengue. You did well with the Salsa, so I think you can handle it. The steps are slow, quick, quick, slow while our entire bodies are undulating.”
I smirked, “Sounds like a piece of cake.”
She held up her finger to silence me, “The Lambada is often called the forbidden dance. It’s meant to be sensual and erotic with close embraces and two bodies moving as one. And not in the same way as the Rumba or the Tango. This is faster, more upbeat.”
I chuckled, “I still see no problem here.”
She rolled her eyes, “The problem is we’re old and it’s gonna wear us out. And well…”
She moved in closer, wrapping my arms around her middle and threw hers around my neck. There were only a few inches between us.
“You know the beginning of Dirty Dancing when it shows all the staff dancing? Grinding up on each other?”
I raised a brow and nodded, “Yeah, why?”
She arched her back toward me, our stomachs touching as she began moving her hips against me. Like, really grinding against me.
I sucked in a sharp breath, getting hard instantly. I stepped away with a tight smile, “Oh. Fuck. Ooook. So, imma have to learn to control my boner. Got it.”
She snickered, “Yeah, that.”
I sighed, “Well, the safest bet would be to have sex right before we go on stage. That should keep him down through the performance at least.”
Kat burst into giggles, “Thank God we talked yesterday, or this would have ended so badly…or not. Who knows?”
“Ugh, I don’t even wanna think about it. That would have been terrible.”
She cleared her throat, “Ok, let’s get serious. How erotic do you wanna get?”
I shrugged, “Don’t hold back. You know me, if they want a show…Imma give em one.”
And with that, we began building our routine. We worked it out quickly, damn near reading each other’s mind in the process. We were back and more in sync than we’d ever been. We may have lost a day of rehearsal, but we more than made up for it. By the end of the session, we had a solid plan. It only needed practicing and tweaking.
By the time behind the scenes filming rolled around on Thursday, we had the routine down. With both of us being in a significantly better mood this week and on the same page with everything, we took the opportunity to relax and have fun. We were full of jokes, teasing each other and breaking into giggling fits over the tiniest things. The camera crew seemed surprised, most likely expecting more angry outbursts and bickering given how things had been going. Overall, it was a good day. The best part was that the day ended with Kat at home with me and Zee.
The rest of the week went by in a blur of rehearsals, self-care to make sure our bodies didn’t give out on us, and just being together. Our bond felt stronger than ever. Kat seemed happy, completely at ease. Whatever had been plaguing her thoughts was now long gone. She no longer held back, sharing her thoughts and feelings whenever it struck her to do so. Every time she told me that she loved me, my heart danced a little in my chest. I never realized how much I needed to hear someone say that to me until her. And now, I crave it constantly.
It was show day before we knew it. Kat and I were there bright and early, the first to go through camera blocking as always. We performed flawlessly each time, both of us all smiles. Things felt different on and off the dance floor this time. Kat was more relaxed in her interactions with me, not hesitating to touch me in any way. There was a flirtiness to her that others were definitely picking up on. The whispers and stares did not go unnoticed by us. None of it seemed to bother or deter her. Given that we only had two weeks left, I figured she was ready to throw caution to the wind.
Since I had missed the production meeting, I had no idea what our costumes looked like. I was surprised to find the color of the week was much brighter than normal. They had Kat in a bright yellow fringe dress that left very little to the imagination. It emphasized her thighs and hips in a way that had me absolutely salivating. I knew it would be a miracle if I made it through the performance without little Bravo making a special guest appearance. I made sure to take a moment to snap a few pictures for social media, and a few other sexier ones for myself.
They had me in a matching yellow shirt with navy trousers. The look was topped off with a navy blazer with light blue and yellow stripes. I didn’t hate it. It was something fun and different, but I doubted the blazer was going to stay. I was sweating bullets before I even put it on. Between nerves and Kat looking fucking amazing, my blood was boiling.
Kat and I were back to our usual antics during hair and makeup, causing a scene of boisterous laughter with our favorite crew as they worked to beautify us. They ended up going with the normal slicked back hair for me. They left Kat’s hair down, styling it into soft bouncy waves that I was dying to run my fingers through. It really was going to be a battle of willpower to behave myself today.
We had dress rehearsal after that. We sailed through without issue, aside from the semi I was sporting from Kat rubbing up on me with all her exposed skin. It had her giggling against my neck as I pulled her in for a hug when the routine concluded. We stayed like that for what was probably too long before pulling apart as I tried to think about anything but her up against me.
We were given leave to entertain ourselves until the show started. So, we went back to my dressing room. Evan was kind enough to drop off some lunch for us because whatever it was catering had wasn’t it. He didn’t stick around for long, giving us a sly smile and a wink as he slinked out the door while being sure to lock it behind him. He must have been picking up on the vibe.
Kat chuckled, “I don’t know why he feels the need to lock the door. Like we’re gonna be getting up to mischief or something.”
I arched a brow at her, “Aren’t we? I was only half joking about the sex before performing thing the other day…”
She smirked, “Oh really?”
I grinned, “Yeah, I mean we’re performing first, right? I say we let fucking be our hype song this week. It’s a good way to get the adrenaline pumping.”
She snorted out a laugh, standing from where she was perched on the vanity.
“All right Bravo, you win.”
She turned her back to me, undoing the skinny strap across her back and the one around her neck. The barely there fabric in the front slipped downward to where she caught it just before it revealed anything.
“How do you want me?” she asked with a seductive tone.
My mouth fell open, “Umm, one moment.”
I stood from my seat, stripping out of my costume - having enough sense to put it on a hanger rather than wadding it up on the floor for once. Kat waited, unmoving, as she watched me in the mirror. I approached her, pulling her hair to the side to kiss down her neck and back as I slid her costume down her thighs. I laid it across one of the empty chairs before taking my usual seat.
I motioned for her to come to me. Once she was standing between my open thighs, I turned her to face away from me. I left a wet path of kisses along her side, working my way down to give her a little nip on her ass cheek, eliciting a giggle that she tried to muffle with her hand. I gently rubbed at the bruise on the other side, shaking my head at her ridiculous behavior.
Then my hand traveled lower, rubbing between her already soaking wet folds. I worked to open her up and get her ready for me. Just when her body began to tremble, I stopped. My leg wedged between her knees as my hands found her hips, pulling her to sit right where I wanted her. She let out a throaty groan, taking me in deep. I guided her movements, keeping it slow and teasing. She tucked her chin against her chest, biting back her breathy moans as she tried to keep it together. I leaned back in the chair, pulling her to lay against my chest - making sure to gather her hair to the side and drape it over my shoulder.
As I wrapped my arms around her torso, she spread her legs wide, allowing me the space to move. I buried my face in the curve of her neck, thrusting slowly. Her hand moved to reach for my hair, but I grabbed it mid-way and tutted at her as I continued to hold on to it. I knew there would be no time to fix that mess if I let her get hold of it.
Within minutes she was on the edge again, all it took was for me to reach down to the apex of her thighs and rub tight circles in just the right spot. She worked to free one of her hands from my grip, biting into the plushy spot just under her thumb to hold back the moans as she trembled on top of me. I moved faster, in almost a relentless pace following behind her soon after. I had to resist the urge to bite onto her shoulder to muffle the sounds of my own pleasure just as one of the production assistants gave the twenty-minute warning outside my door. Kat leaned her head against mine, both of us holding in a laugh as I shifted to sit us upright in the seat.
I chuckled against her shoulder, giving it one last kiss. “That was perfect timing. Guess we better get dressed. Hop up, I’ve got some towels in my bag.”
She huffed out a laugh as she stood, “Came prepared, did ya?”
I pulled said towels from the bag and shrugged, “I gotta be with you around. But also, it was either this or my hand. Something had to happen.”
I gave her one of the towels, both of us smiling like a couple of fools as we wiped away the sweat and wetness. I helped Kat with her costume, fastening the straps and making sure everything was secure. She hadn’t even bothered to go to her dressing room this morning, leaving her bag in mine instead. That turned out to be a good thing so she could touch up her makeup and hair while I got dressed.
By the time we made it to the staging area, we had seven minutes to spare before performing. It was just enough time for the hair and makeup crew to give us one last look over before we were taking our spots on the dance floor. The burst of adrenaline and everything else pumping through my body made the moment seem hazy. It was almost dreamlike as we eyed each other in the dim lighting.
The spotlights dropped down on us as the opening trumpet sounds of 🎶Ain’t it Funny began to play from the band. Kat was in her zone, her eyes blazing with that fire I loved so much. Our energy was off the charts. We were perfectly synchronized as we did our twists and spins, managing to keep our frame compact with full control of our movements. Our bodies rolled in tandem, transitioning to dips and sensual hip action that had the audience going insane.
While we’d had some steamy performances in the past, this one took it to a whole new level. There was a different vibe. It was sexy in a teasing sort of way. We held nothing back, showcasing the connection between us as we moved through the intricate step combos. We could feel it before the dance was over, we knew it was one of our best performances to date.
We tried to play it cool while we waited for our scores, but the glances passing between the two of us said it all. We knew we were not going home tonight, and we were right. Kat and I held on to each other as each score of ten was read off by the judges. They praised us for our comeback after last week, noting that we were only the fourth couple to have ever performed that dance and were the best. None of the other three couples had received a perfect score. We were the first and only ones to make it happen.
Kat and I were on cloud nine for the rest of the evening, both of us giving toothy grins every time the cast or crew complimented us. Marc and Stefanie were still our biggest cheerleaders, acting just as excited about our performance as we were. We returned the favor of course, even if they did score one point lower than us.
The scowls from Alec were obvious. He made no attempt to hide his disdain for us. That did nothing to dampen our mood, especially when we caught a glimpse of Lana shooting a small smile our way when Alec had his back turned. If anything, it only made the entire situation more entertaining.
Once the show was over, we joined Marc and Stefanie at a nearby burger joint to celebrate making it to the final four. It was nice to spend time with new friends and discuss our feelings about the show. We also tried to strategize and make guesses about what they were going to have us do for the finale. In a way, it gave me a better idea of what to expect and helped calm some of the nerves that were brewing in the pit of my stomach.
As of tonight, it was down to us, Marc and Stefanie, Alec and Lana, and Anika and her partner. The finale was shaping up to be full of tension and intense competition. Our main goal was to keep Alec and Anika from winning, but deep-down Kat and I really wanted that fucking trophy. She deserved to end her time on the show with a bang, and I wanted to prove everyone who doubted me wrong. There was no stopping us now.
Next: Week 11
✨FUN FACT: What Kat said about no one doing the Lambada on the show since 2009 is true! There have only been 3 couples out of 33 seasons (so far) to have performed this dance. None of which received perfect scores. I have linked them below if you're interested.
Video 1 Video 2 Video 3
A/N: Hello my lovelies! Fucking finally! Right? Our babies are back together! And look at Dieter being all sappy and soft. I love him.
Are we shocked Lana is still on her redemption tour? I don't think we can hate her anymore, can we? Then of course we have Lydia and Evan doing their good deeds as well.
How about that Instagram Live? Doesn't that song just tear your heart out? And Zee getting in on the action? I think I'd climb over a fence after that too.
And what about Kat pouring her little heart out as well? That girl is laying it all out there now.
So, we have 2 chapters and the epilogue left after this. Can you believe it? The next chapter is going to be drama filled. All of this dancing is finally going to take it's toll on Kat. Dieter is going to be in a tizzy, taking care of his lady. On top of that, it's Samba week. Yay for more Latin dancing...or not? Alec will be up to his shady shit (yeah, he's not done yet). I will say, the last two chapters will probably be much shorter since things are wrapping up. I mean, I say that, but I may shock myself. You never know with me.
And finally, some housekeeping. I'm sure you've noticed by now that I have struck the "Moonstruck" part of my name. There was a reason for that (aside form it being too fucking long). Expansion! As you can see, I am posting this chapter from a new sideblog. This blog will be solely dedicated to my writing. No nonsense posts. I will eventually be migrating everything over here. Why you ask? I did a poll a while back about this. While most preferred to be tagged, a decent number would rather follow and subscribe to notifications. So, you now have the option to do that without all the clutter. I will still be tagging folks though.
I also added something else new, the Chaos Corner! It will be dedicated to all things Dieter (fics, media, memes, fan art, etc). Fics will be linked by categories and tropes. So go have a look and find some new content. I welcome you to send me some goods to share with the chaos crew. Our trashy friends need all the Dieter content.
Lastly, I want to do a quick shutout to my first loves, Dieter and Talia. It is the two year anniversary of Destiny & Deliverance this week. If I can get my shit together, I'm going to try to do a little something for them.
That's it. That's all I've got. Until next time,
💜Mysty
Closed Position Masterlist ||| Main Masterlist
Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)
Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble.
Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo.
Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.
Chapter Word Count: 10.6K
👉 Fic Warnings: Sexual tension, mutual pining, angst, so much smut (we get a little dom and sub Dieter, intimacy, use of a sex toy, sex acts in public, spanking...really it's all too much to list here - it's Dieter, use your imagination), spicy language, themes dealing with intimate partner violence (not by Dieter), past alcohol abuse, past drug abuse, and shitty parents. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Cat dad / plant dad Dieter comes with his own warnings.
👉 Chapter Warnings: Self-sabotaging thoughts, sassy Dieter, smutty stuff (light dom/sub dynamics (Dieter's in charge), restraint with hands and body, nipple biting, finger sucking/biting, fingering, p in v, intimacy), so much angst.
Note: In case you missed it, check out this post before reading. There will be call backs to a couple of past conversations. It may help to have a refresher.
Chapter Quote:
“Don’t tell me that or you’re gonna lure the horndog out again. He’s not above dry humping a thigh.”
Kat's POV
The last two and a half weeks with Dieter had been nothing short of perfect as we settled into a new routine. I had hardly been home, now spending all of my time with him at his place or rehearsing. It almost felt like it had always been this way. Our lives were quickly falling into place so seamlessly, to the point that I was waiting for the other shoe to drop and allowing the doubt to slowly creep in. I knew this couldn’t last forever, and it was stoking a fear in me that I didn’t really understand. I couldn’t pinpoint the cause, so I tried to pack it away in a box in the back of my mind. However, its presence never ceased. Lurking. Festering. Waiting for the thing that would unleash it.
Tuesday morning, I was stepping out of my car in the Television City Studios lot ahead of our weekly production meeting with Stacia and Joe. The moment I closed the door, I was met with several paparazzi coming toward me. I was momentarily stunned given they shouldn’t have been on the property, but I tried not to let it get to me as I made my way toward the main entrance at a brisk pace.
I tried to ignore them, but they made it damn near impossible as they shouted questions my way and followed too closely.
“Kat, how are you feelin’ about Dieter’s new relationship?”
I couldn’t help smiling to myself. His Instagram posts really were causing a stir. “I couldn’t be more happy for him,” I replied.
The pap moved in closer, “Have you met her? What do you think?”
I had to bite back a chuckle as I continued my brisk walk, “I know her well. They both seem very happy.”
They were beginning to crowd me as another yelled, “Do you think it’s serious? Do you really think it’s gonna last given his history as one of Hollywood’s biggest playboys?”
Something about that question made my gut turn. I didn’t bother to answer, pushing past them as I inhaled a deep breath to calm the sudden uneasiness. It was about that time one of the security guards caught sight of the intruders and came to my rescue, stopping the paps in their tracks as I entered the building. I was feeling flustered as I approached Dieter, who was already seated in the lobby with our usual coffees. After a glance, he stood and met me halfway.
His brows were furrowed with concern as he asked, “You OK?”
I nodded, “Yeah…just some paparazzi caught me in the parking lot. I’m good…just wasn’t expecting it.”
He rolled his eyes, “That’s bullshit. Security needs to do better.”
I sighed, “Yeah, I mean they stopped them. It’s fine.”
He looked about as confident as I felt with my response as he handed my cup of coffee over. I gave him a tight smile in thanks as we moved to sit on the small couches. My mind kept circling back to that comment about him being one of Hollywood’s biggest playboys. It wasn’t like it was a secret, but for some reason it was getting to me today. I pushed the thought aside, blaming my insecurities as I turned to face Dieter. I was surprised to find him staring at me, the crease still present between his brows.
I gave him a small smile in an attempt to brush things off, “So, what do you think we’ll get stuck with this week?”
He pursed his lips in thought, “Hmmm, my vote is on the Samba.”
I huffed out a laugh, “God, I hope not. My hips need a break from Latin dancing.”
He fought a smile as he leaned in closer to speak in a quiet voice only I could hear, “You sure the problem isn’t from all the horizontal dancing?”
I snorted out a laugh, “No, definitely not. If anything, that makes me forget my issues exist.”
His eyes briefly dropped down to my lips as he smirked. I could tell he wanted to kiss me, but refrained given the public setting. He leaned back into the couch, licking his bottom lip as he looked at me in a way that could only be described as sinful. “I hope they put you in purple this week. You look good in purple.”
I chuckled, “That’s random. Why purple?”
He was smiling now, “I was just thinking of that SNL photoshoot, when they had you in that deep purple dress. The color looked amazing against your skin. That purple bikini looked pretty fucking hot too…”
His words made my heart flutter. Knowing that he noticed the purple dress before anything had happened between us and actually remembered it was hitting kind of different. It definitely took my mind off the negative thoughts I had been having a few minutes prior. The mention of the purple bikini also had me thinking about everything that happened after it came off.
A PA chose that moment to appear out of nowhere, letting us know that Stacia and Joe were ready for us. We stood, and made our way to the conference room where we were met with two very agitated looking executive producers. There was a tense energy in the room as we took our seats across from them. I could feel Dieter’s leg press against mine under the table. I wasn’t sure if he was trying to help me relax or seeking reassurance for himself.
Their eyes focused on Dieter for a beat before Stacia finally spoke. “I’m gonna need for you to tell me what the hell is going on because we’re getting inundated with calls from the press.”
Right to it then…
Dieter shrugged nonchalantly, “I’m gonna need you to be a little more specific…because I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Stacia scoffed, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. You know exactly what I’m talking about…the social media posts? The mystery brunette with you on the beach that’s plastered all over the tabloids? You’ve got nothing to say about that?”
I glanced over at him, just in time to see the side of his lips twitch upward. “What is there to say? That I’m seeing someone? It’s my personal life. I didn’t realize I needed your permission.”
Stacia looked like she could have punched the smug look off his face. I had to bite my bottom lip to keep from laughing over how worked up she was getting. She leaned forward, pinning Dieter with her eyes as they flashed with anger, “If it affects this show, then yes, you need to give a heads up. Our ratings may plummet over this, you realize that right? The fans have bought into shipping you two, and if they can’t do that, then they won’t watch.”
Dieter huffed out a laugh, “Kat and I never agreed to that narrative. That was all you guys. I’m not gonna stop living my life just because of some bullshit story line you two dreamed up on our behalf for a reality show that’s supposed to be about DANCING. There was nothing in my contract that forbid me from doing it, so you can fuck right off with that attitude.”
I rolled my lips together as I fought a burst of laughter. Funny enough, Joe seemed like he was trying to do the same as Stacia’s mouth fell agape. She scoffed in disbelief as she sunk back into her chair and crossed her arms over her chest.
Joe leaned forward as he held his hands out in a peaceful gesture, “Look, you’re right. We have no say in your personal life. A head’s up still would’ve been nice so that we could expect the influx of inquiries from the press. It’s been nonstop since you made those posts and that TMZ article went up. We just need to know how to handle this.”
Stacia chose that moment to break into the conversation, her eyes now on me. “Is it you? Are you two tryin’ to play some clever game because you got caught?”
I couldn’t help my eye roll that followed. She thought she was so smart. She was obviously on to us, but I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction.
“I think it’s up to Dieter if he wants to divulge the details of his love life. As far as I’m concerned, it’s none of your business and I’m not saying a word about it. Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to get to the reason we’re here and discuss this week’s performance.”
She let out a controlled breath as her nostrils flared. It was obvious she was about to snap.
“Why have you been so combative this season?” she asked.
I shook my head, “I’m not being combative right now. This is a Dieter thing…not a me thing. So, I’m removing myself from the discussion.”
Dieter snickered quietly beside me. I could tell he was enjoying himself way more than he probably should be, but I couldn’t fault him for it because I was too.
Stacia threw her hands up in frustration, “So what the hell are we supposed to tell these reporters that keep calling for comments?”
I watched Dieter as he gave her a sarcastic smile, “How about nothing? No comment? We don’t comment on the private lives of our cast members? It’s not that fucking hard.”
There was something about him being like this that was melting my insides. I was proud of him for standing up for himself - for us. I was also insanely turned on by it too.
I shifted my attention back to Stacia, who was sitting still, staring Dieter down with wide eyes. Joe sighed before reaching for the folder in front of her, pulling out the costume sketches for the week and sliding them over to us.
Dieter smirked as he peered down at them, bumping his leg against mine as he spoke, “Hmm, lavender is a good color. I approve.”
I couldn’t help the smile on my lips as I leaned over to look at the sketches. His day had obviously been made by the light purple gown they had me in. The front of it was in the shape of an X, crossing over the chest with a triangular cut out around the navel. The back was completely open. The bottom half looked to be made of a lightweight flowy fabric. Dieter would be wearing a matching light purple shirt with dark trousers.
I nodded in approval as I slid the sketches back toward Joe. He gave me a tight smile, “Good. You’ll be doing the Viennese Waltz this week. I’ll have the music sent over.”
He looked away, shuffling papers in the folder, seemingly dismissing us. Stacia continued to watch us with a sour look on her face as we stood to leave.
Both of us nearly burst into laughter as soon as we were in the lobby. I could have kissed him right there, but held back as he smiled at me.
“That felt fucking amazing. Right?” he finally said.
I chuckled, “It did, honestly. I’m not sure they’ve ever had so much resistance before. It’s driving Stacia crazy that she doesn’t have control right now.”
His smile widened, “I know we’ll probably regret this later, but totally worth it to see her face.”
I moved in closer, gently tugging on the front of his shirt, “You know…it’s kind of hot when you put your foot down like that.”
He was beaming now, causing his cheek to dimple and eyes to crinkle in that way I love.
His eyes scanned the area around us before settling on mine as he leaned in, “How about we have lunch at your place today before we head to the studio?”
I snorted out a laugh, “I don’t think lunch is what you’re after.”
His brows arched, “No? I do actually plan to have a very nice meal…and maybe even some dessert…”
I peered up at him with a smirk, “I fear we may not make it to rehearsal…”
He feigned shock and clutched his chest before shifting into a mischievous grin, “I would never skip rehearsal. I'm a good student. Besides, I’m fully capable of being quick with my meals. It’s the number of servings that get me in trouble. You’ll just have to cut me off before I’ve had my fill…so long as you’ve had yours.”
Two and a half hours later, we finally made it to the dance studio after thoroughly having our way with each other as soon as we stepped through my front door. Both of us were still feeling giddy and energized from our exploits as we stretched out on the floor to listen to the song for this week.
I turned over on my back as I hit play. The song wasn’t new to me. It was a popular song used for the Viennese Waltz in competition, but for some reason, hearing it now felt different. My skin broke out in goosebumps as I really listened to the lyrics for the first time. They were striking a nerve, causing me to suddenly feel on edge for absolutely no reason.
When it ended, I turned to look at Dieter. He was stretched out on his side with his head propped on his hand, staring at me. The space between us suddenly felt heavy with tension. This tension felt different, almost smothering.
I cleared my throat, avoiding his gaze as I asked, “So, what’re your initial thoughts on this one?”
He sighed, “Well, I think it’s talking about the vulnerability and fear that comes with a new relationship where there’s a deep emotional connection…and overcoming the obstacles after past struggles. Having that fear of opening up and letting them in…trusting again after being hurt.”
It was obvious to me then, this song was everything I was trying to shove in that little box hidden in the back of my mind. As if I needed a reminder. Maybe this was the universe’s way of forcing me to deal with those feelings.
I gave him a weak smile, “Yeah, that sounds right. So…how do we wanna translate that to dance?”
He shrugged, “I guess, maybe focus on the vulnerability and connection? The internal battle?”
I nodded, sitting up before moving to stand. I needed to change the topic. “Yeah, sounds good. So, let's go over the hold and footwork…then we can get into the choreography.”
Dieter stood, framing up his arms without prompting. He already knew the drill.
I walked around him, observing his frame before moving in to make adjustments. “You’re probably gonna hate this one because it’s a very unnatural position to put your body in. Your shoulders should be down with your elbows up and you’ll need to bend your knees. It’s definitely not a dance for beginners.”
He groaned as I essentially manhandled him into the correct position. “You’re right, I hate it already. This is gonna wear my back out isn’t it?”
I chuckled, “Yeah, probably. But hey, at least it’s not a Latin dance. Our hips will finally get a break.”
He snorted out a laugh, “No they won’t.”
I could feel the heat creeping up my face at his implication. I shook my head, fighting a smile as I moved to stand in front of him to take my position.
“Alright you horndog…focus.”
He mumbled out a quiet, “Sorry,” before rolling his lips together to hold in his smile.
I was still smiling up at him as I continued, “This is called a rotary dance because of all the turns involved. It has a 1-2-3 fast-paced rhythm that consists of natural and reverse turns and change steps that should be smooth and elegant. We should have sort of a rise and fall as we move, but you have to make sure your shoulders stay parallel with the floor as we maintain the closed position. Your footwork has to be precise or it’s gonna look messy.”
He followed as I led him into the steps, talking him through it as we moved around the room. He, of course, picked up on it quickly. I gave him a smile of encouragement as he took over leading after several minutes.
“This is another one of those forbidden dances. When it first came about, couples were dancing with little to no contact between them. It was very scandalous as you can imagine. So, leaning into the space between us, being close together is part of it.” I added.
He was fighting a smile, “Don’t tell me that or you’re gonna lure the horndog out again. He’s not above dry humping a thigh.”
I couldn’t help the cackling laugh that slipped out as I melted against him. He seemed delighted with himself as his face lit up from eliciting such a response from me. His arms tightened around me as he leaned his forehead against mine, “God, I love it when you laugh like that…best sound ever.”
Movement in the hallway caught my attention, causing me to sober and pull back from him. It was just a random staff member of the studio passing by, but it was enough to bring me back to the real world - reminding me that we had to watch ourselves here.
We got back to it after that, beginning our process of planning out the routine. Wednesday and Thursday went much the same way. We had a fairly well choreographed dance in place by the time we had filming on Friday.
As the week wore on, I noticed that I was feeling strangely disconnected from it all. I could feel myself dissociating as Dieter and I danced, causing a weird energy to buzz between us. Dieter seemed to pick up on it, often asking if I was feeling ok. I brushed it off, chalking it up to feeling tired, but deep down, I could feel something brewing. I couldn’t put words to it. All I knew was that it felt terrible and destructive.
Dieter seemed to be extra attentive in the evenings, making sure I was taken care of. It was more than I deserved from him considering I was slowly building a wall between us as I drowned in my thoughts and fears about our future together.
As we got ready for bed Saturday night, after an unusually quiet evening, I could see it in his eyes. He could feel the shift in me. We were standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom as he pulled my hair back into a single braid. I avoided his gaze as he watched my reflection. When he finished, his arms snaked around my waist, hugging my back to his front as he buried his face in the curve of my neck. It felt like he was trying to anchor me to him - keep me present and pull me back from whatever dark place I was slipping into.
He stayed like that for a while as I leaned my head backward against his shoulder and reached up to run my fingers through his messy hair. I felt strangely disconnected from the scene being reflected in front of me, almost like I was having an out of body experience.
Dieter inhaled deeply before finally pulling away. I gave him a small smile, but it didn’t reach my eyes. Afterward, we undressed each other as had become the routine. He crawled into bed behind me and pulled me against him just as tight as before. We lay in the dark for a time in silence.
“I feel like you’ve been distant for the past few days. Is something bothering you? Did I do something wrong?” he eventually asked.
I didn’t really know the answer to that question. I could confidently say he hadn’t done anything wrong, but I didn’t understand what I was feeling, so I lied.
“No, you haven’t done anything. I think…I’m just wearing down. I haven’t had to dance this much in a long time.”
He didn’t say anything, but the tense set of his shoulders told me he wasn’t buying it. I turned to face him, wrapping myself around his body as he tangled his limbs with mine. After nuzzling my face into the nook under his chin, I took a few minutes to simply exist with him surrounding me. I welcomed his warmth as it sunk into bones. I inhaled his musky scent, allowing it to calm me as I tried to understand why I was feeling this way.
We stayed that way through the night, clinging to each other like it was our last night on this planet. I needed it. It helped bring me back to him, or so I thought.
My downward spiral hit hard on Sunday. I was nearly feeling back to normal when I awoke with a consuming need to have Dieter. We hadn’t been together since lunch at my place on Tuesday, which suddenly had me feeling empty and needy as I watched him sleep.
I let my hand trail down the smooth contour of his back, making small circles that caused him to squirm against me in his slumber. He looked so relaxed, the permanent crease between his brows nearly nonexistent. His lips parted slightly as he inhaled deep, steady breaths. His hair was a mess of fluffy curls that hung down over his forehead. He really was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
My hand moved to trace along the curve of his nose with the tip of my finger, which seemed to rouse him from sleep. His dark eyes blinked open just as my thumb grazed across his perfectly pouty lips. He smiled, eyes crinkling at the corners as he pulled me a little closer against his chest.
We didn’t speak, instead choosing to get lost in each other's gaze as our hands explored - gliding over any exposed skin they could reach. Something crackled in the air around us, creating an intensity that I wasn’t expecting, making me feel a little emotional as I sought out his lips with mine.
His kiss was slow and sensual, yet still passionate and needy. He took his time, letting the need simmer as his mouth moved against mine with soft touches and gentle sucks. It had my body burning for him as his large palm rested on my neck, grasping under my jaw with his thumb and fingers as he used his weight to shift me onto my back. Something about it made me feel possessed by him, like I was his. Oddly enough, it was exactly what I needed at that moment.
He tilted my head slightly, allowing him to capture my lips and deepen his kiss. His tongue licked into my mouth as his hand released my face and moved south. The backs of his fingertips lightly grazed between my breast and down my stomach before settling at the apex of my thighs, rubbing tight circles in the place I needed it most. His fingers dipped lower to spread my arousal before returning to the sensitive bud. His lips moved lower, placing open mouth kisses along my neck, pausing only to nip along my shoulder with his teeth.
He moved lower still, teasing a nipple with his tongue before nibbling with his teeth. He didn’t bite hard, but it was enough to make me gasp as it sent a jolt of electricity through me. I arched into him as his lips suctioned around the peak and sucked it through his teeth. I let out a quiet whine as he repeated the motions to the other side.
By the time he sunk his fingers into my wet heat, I was near the edge, it only took a few curls against that sweet spot to push me over. He was leaning above me now, his eyes on mine, pupils blown wide as he watched me fall apart under his touch in a way that no one else had ever been able to accomplish.
I went limp, melting into the bedding as his hand moved upward, rubbing along my hip while he gave me a chance to regain my senses. A devilish smirk formed on his lips as his hungry eyes roamed over me. I let out a controlled breath, reaching for his face, allowing my thumb to brush against his now swollen bottom lip. He surprised me, dipping his chin to capture it between his teeth, not really biting it, just holding it there as his lips closed around the tip before dragging them off. The sharpness of his teeth combined with the sucking sensation of his lips sent another jolt through my body, causing me to whine for more. His hand reached for mine as he turned his head, kissing my palm before wrapping his fingers around my wrist to place it above my head.
He shifted, grabbing my free wrist so it could join with the other one. He trapped them both there with one of his large hands, pausing to watch me - giving me a chance to stop him. I could feel my breathing pickup as I sunk my teeth into my bottom lip in anticipation of whatever he was about to do. The smirk was back as he moved between my thighs to line himself up at my entrance. He sank in slowly, jaw going slack and eyes squeezing shut from the feeling. A quiet groan rumbled in his chest, the sound of it nearly had me coming undone all over again.
I watched as the muscles in his torso tensed. His mouth snapped shut as he took a few deep breaths to center himself, his jaw flexing as he did so. His eyes blinked open, focusing on mine. His free hand dropped to my thigh, snaking under it to lift my leg over his upper arm as he leaned forward and pinned me to the bed. He began to move at an agonizingly slow pace, pausing to grind his hips against me between each thrust. He dipped his head just close enough to run his nose along the contours of my face, ghosting his lips against mine but never fully touching them. It was maddening.
As he increased the pace of his thrusts, his grip on my wrists and leg tightened. He watched me squirm under him, seeking more friction. More of his skin. His mouth. His smug smile told me that he had me exactly where he wanted - under his control and at his mercy. He could have done anything he wanted to me because I couldn’t move under his hold.
I never would have allowed Alec to pin me down like this. I never trusted him enough to have that kind of control over me. But with Dieter, it was different. I wanted him to claim me as his. I wanted him to have his way with me because I knew he wouldn’t take advantage of having that kind of power and I was enjoying every second of it.
I could feel the tension building again, both of us panting and sharing the air between us as he pressed his forehead against mine. His groans became louder as he got closer to his release. His lips finally crashed into mine the moment my core tightened around him. His hand released my wrists and came to rest on my neck as his fingertips and thumb dug into the sides of my face. He whimpered against my lips as he fell over the edge with me, his thrust becoming erratic before his body tensed with a guttural groan deep in his chest. He eventually relaxed against me, nearly dissolving into a puddle as my fingers tangled in his hair.
His arms wrapped around me, shifting us to lay on our sides as he buried his face in my neck. We lay with each other in silence, not having said a word to each other since waking. We didn’t have to. Our bodies did the talking for us.
I wasn’t sure how much time passed before he mumbled out a cheeky, “Good morning,” against my neck. I laughed against the top of his fluffy head as he hugged me tighter. The silence stretched between us again, allowing my mind to begin the self sabotage.
The fact that I was willing to give up that much control to him scared me. I could lose myself to him so easily. Hell, I was pretty sure I already was. A part of me worried that it wouldn’t be enough, that I wouldn’t be enough for him. My past was now working against me, making me question everything. I had been so wrong before, to the point that I now couldn’t trust my own judgement.
As we went through our morning routine, I could feel the funk settling in again. It was in full swing as we walked into the dance studio for rehearsals. The damn song for our performance definitely wasn’t helping. It played over and over again as we worked on perfecting our choreography for the week. I was half tempted to find the instrumental version, just so I didn’t have to hear the lyrics anymore because I felt like they were seriously fucking with my emotions. I definitely didn’t need any help with that.
I became distant again, dissociating and only going through the movements. Dieter realized it, of course, but he didn’t say anything. He only watched me, his mind working double time to try and figure out what was going on. He offered to take breaks often, assuming perhaps that my joints were hurting. He was doing everything right, like he always did.
That evening was spray tan night for the cast. The tanning crew were running behind on setup, which left us waiting longer than normal. I ended up needing to excuse myself to go to a nearby restroom, which turned out to be a terrible idea.
I was just finishing up in the end stall and reaching for the handle when I heard someone mention Dieter’s name. I froze as the voices got louder, clearly thinking they were now alone. One of the voices I didn’t recognize, possibly one of the new dancers, but the more prominent one was definitely Anika.
“She can’t seriously think that whole thing is gonna work out with him, right? She is sooo not his type. Everyone knows that Dieter Bravo is into freaky shit. I seriously doubt Kat can keep up with that. She’s so boring. And…let’s be real…the man is known for hooking up with his cast mates and dumping them when the show’s over. Why would she think she’s any different? Guys like that don’t change. It’s just the way they’re wired. I honestly can’t believe she’s even going there.”
The other girl snickered, “Maybe it’s just a rebound thing…something to keep her distracted after that whole Alec and Lana mess. I can’t blame her, I would jump on that as a distraction too. That man is aging like a fine wine. He’s looking really good lately…and the way he moves, you know he has to be a good fuck.”
Anika sighed loudly, “I know, right? I’m a little disappointed he’s not working his way through the cast. I’ve heard he used to be notorious for that. I know that I definitely wouldn’t tell him no.”
Their voices faded as they exited the room. I sunk against the stall door, clutching at my chest, silently begging my heart to calm itself. As if I needed to be reminded of my doubts. Clearly everyone else thought the same thing, I wasn’t enough for him. He was eventually going to get bored and want something more. Just like Alec did. And my heart was going to be absolutely obliterated by it this time. I couldn’t handle it, not from Dieter.
I spent far longer than I should have in that stall, willing the tears not to come. I finally pulled it together enough to rejoin the group. I could hear the blood pumping in my ears as I moved to stand next to Dieter. He noticed something was wrong immediately, his brows pinching together as he looked at me. I avoided his gaze, shaking my head and saying it was nothing. Across the room, I could see Anika and one of the new cast members giving me the side eye.
Luckily we didn’t have to wait long. They were ready for us soon after that, making sure Dieter and I were the first two in and out in an effort to keep us away from my asshole ex. I was thankful for it, needing to get away from the crowd. They were making me feel claustrophobic all of a sudden. I couldn’t help wondering if everyone who stared at us was thinking the same thing as Anika, that I wasn’t enough for him to keep me around.
We made our way back to our dressing rooms after that. Dieter made sure everything was clear in mine before heading to his. I changed quickly, trying to keep my mind on gathering everything I needed to pack into my gym bag. I soon realized that I really needed some time to myself, to figure out what the fuck was going on in my brain.
Dieter was back at my door within minutes. He had a concerned look in his eyes as he asked what I wanted for dinner. I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose as I turned to face him.
“I think…I’m gonna head home for the night. I’ve got a bunch of things that I’ve been neglecting to do…and I need to call my sister. She’s been blowing up my phone about that last TMZ article.”
He inhaled deeply, releasing the breath slowly as he nodded. “Yeah, that’s…fine. I don’t wanna keep you from things.”
I shook my head, “No, you’re not. That’s…on me. I’m procrastinating.”
He pursed his lips as he turned to look down the hallway, rolling his eyes as he looked back toward me. “Alec is wandering around. I’ll walk you to your car.”
I gave him a tight smile, reaching for my bag and throwing it over my shoulder. He walked along beside me, hands shoved deep in the pockets of his jeans as he stared at the ground. I felt like everyone was staring at us as we walked past, which only increased the anxiety I was feeling.
When we got to my car, he pulled the door open for me. His eyes looked sad as they roamed over my face. He swallowed thickly before speaking, “Call me if you need anything, even if it’s just to talk.”
I nodded, forcing a smile before turning to get into the driver's seat. After I fastened my seat belt, he shut the door. I watched him as he walked toward his car, head down as he rubbed at the back of his neck with his right hand. His left, was clenching and unclenching into a tight fist. I sighed, leaning my head against the steering wheel as I took deep breaths.
“What the fuck am I doing? He’s not like Alec.”
I had to keep telling myself that like a mantra as I started the car and drove to my house. By the time I got home, I was spiraling hard. Overhearing Anika had really done a number on me. It had me doubting everything.
I sank back onto the sofa with my phone, wasting no time dialing my sister’s number. She answered on the second ring.
“Well, well. To what do I owe the pleasure?” she said in greeting.
I sighed, “Lyd, I need for you to talk some sense into me…please.”
She sucked in a sharp breath, “What happened? I thought things were going well?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose, “It was…it is…it’s just…am I being stupid about this? Do you think I’m enough for him?”
“Oh Kat, honey…don’t do this. Everyone can see that man is obsessed with you. I don’t care how hard you try to hide it.”
I rubbed my palm against my forehead, feeling a headache coming on. “Yeah, right now he may be…and you know how that is with the dancing. The whole dancer connection thing…he may just be feeling that, ya know? I don’t think I’m what he usually goes for. Not from what I’ve seen anyway. What if he gets bored with me? I can be a very boring person.”
She sighed, “Kat, don’t let what happened with Alec get in the way of what you’re building with Dieter. It’s not the same. He is a completely different person. He actually cares about you…I’m not sure that Alec ever really cared about anyone but himself.”
I sunk down further into the cushions, debating if I wanted to say what I was thinking. Because once I did, it was out there. I would be admitting it out loud to myself and my sister.
I let out a stuttered breath as the tears pooled in my eyes, “I think…I’m in love with him, Lydia….and not in the way I was with Alec. That was nothing compared to this. If he doesn’t want this, I won’t be able to handle it. I think…I think I jumped into this too soon. I’m not sure that I’m ready…”
Lydia huffed into the phone, “Have you talked to Dieter about this? If you haven’t you need to.”
I shook my head even though I knew she couldn’t see me, “No. I haven’t. I don’t know what to say. I don’t understand what I’m feeling because I’ve never felt like this before.”
“So tell him that. You never know, he may feel the same way.”
The tears were falling now. I absentmindedly wiped them away, “And if he doesn’t? Then I’ve made an ass of myself.”
“Hmm, well…something tells me he does.”
I let out a controlled breath, “Maybe…I should just slow things down. We’ve been all in from the first second…literally days after I ended a six year, very toxic relationship. I jumped in head first and it’s just going too fast.”
I could hear shuffling on the other end of the line, then a door closing. “What’s happening that makes it fast? Did he ask you to marry him or something?”
I scoffed, “Geez, no.”
“What then? Did he ask you to move in?”
I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. “No. But I mean, I’ve basically lived at his house since we got back from New York.”
She chuckled, “That’s kind of what couples do when they're in the honeymoon phase, Kat. Has he even told you that he loves you yet?”
“Umm, no. He hasn’t. That word has not been said and that discussion not had.”
“So how the hell is it going too fast? Just because you feel like you’re in love with him? Some people feel that the first time they meet their significant other. I did. I knew immediately.”
I whined, “I feel like you’re missing the point. It’s not that simple.”
“Isn’t it though? That’s all it boils down too. You’re worried it’s too soon. It’s not.”
I fell over onto my side, burying my face into a decorative pillow and groaning in frustration. “OK, well…aside from that. I’m still worried he’s gonna get bored with me and move on once the show is over. I’m still not convinced this isn’t just due to the situation and hormones. God…the hormones. I seriously don’t know what he’s done to me. I swear, I could spend a whole weekend in bed with the man and it still wouldn’t be enough.”
Lydia snorted out a laugh, “That good, huh?”
I sighed, “Yes, he is. I’ve let him do things to me no one has ever done…and I want him to do more. He’s addicting. The sex is addicting. That’s not normal…”
“Ehh, please stop there. I don’t wanna know the details of that…”
I let out a humorless laugh, “The sad part is, it’s all been pretty tame. I’m so fucking vanilla.”
“I don’t even know how to respond to that…Look, obviously your cock-whipped. I get it. You haven’t had a decent lay in years. I guess I can see where you're coming from…BUT being in love and lust are completely different. You said he was making a point to make it not about sex, right? That means something…”
I chewed on the inside of my cheek as I considered her words, “Yeah, he does do that. We do go days without doing anything. He’s actually capable of having intimate moments without escalating it.”
“See, that’s why I think it’s something more. He’s putting in the effort. And have you seen the way he looks at you? Even if he hasn’t said it…and maybe he hasn’t put a word to it yet…but I’m fairly certain that man has big feelings for you. He’s never put this kind of effort into a relationship before.”
My brows furrowed in confusion, “What, are you two having secret conversations behind my back? How the hell would you know?”
She laughed nervously, “Well, when my only sister starts seeing a new man after being with an absolute dick for so long…you better bet I’m gonna investigate the fucker. I did my homework…and from what I’ve seen and what you’ve told me, this is different for him too. He’s invested. And if you need proof, get on YouTube and look up videos of you guys rehearsing and dancing. It’s obvious. There’s something there that was never there with Alec. Has he given you any reason to doubt him?”
I sighed, “No…it’s been the opposite actually. He’s been perfect…but that doesn’t mean he won’t get bored with me later.”
It was her turn to sigh, “Well, you have to decide if that’s a risk you’re willing to take. He probably has the same fears, ya know? Especially if he’s as into you as I think he is.”
My head was spinning. She had some good points, and she was right. I needed to decide if I was willing to risk it. So, really, I was right back where I started. My mind was working overtime examining every detail, and in the end, I was really just psyching myself out.
Lydia broke through my thoughts, “So, what was with the social media posts and the TMZ stuff? You guys fucking with them or what because I know my sister’s ass when I see it.”
I snorted out a laugh, “Yeah, something like that. Just keeping Stacia and Joe on their toes more than anything. They were pissed over it.”
She cackled, “Good. They deserve it.”
We hung up soon after that. I had hoped that I would feel better after talking with Lydia, but in reality, I felt even more confused. I took her advice, pulling up YouTube on my phone and entering our names in the search bar. The search results populated every second of our time on the show together. I spent a good hour watching clips, starting with the oldest ones first.
It was obvious from week one that we had chemistry. Even on those filming days that hadn’t been so great, the spark between us was still there. I had joked with him about having heart eyes in recent weeks, but looking back now, he had them all along. The only difference was the longing was no longer there. It was replaced with something else. Happiness maybe?
There was something sort of comforting about seeing his confidence grow through the clips. More than that, seeing our trust in each other grow. There was no hesitation between us now. We were completely at ease with being in each other’s space, anticipating the other’s movements, moving as one. The connection between us when we danced really was something to behold. I could now understand why it had become such a big deal on the show. We weren’t fooling anyone. The fire burning between us was too big to hide.
I was beginning to feel better about things, until I made a major mistake. I opened google and typed in his name. The first thing that popped up in the search results was the most recent TMZ article. I, of course, clicked on it. I took a few minutes to inspect the pictures. I could tell it was me in them, but it really could have been anyone from that distance. Dieter’s broad frame was unmistakable though. Not many people had a shoulder to waist ratio like him.
I scrolled to the bottom of the article, clicking the “Dieter Bravo” tag to see what else came up. I shouldn't have. It linked to an endless amount of articles that showed him out at clubs, women and men hanging off of him. More times than not he had either a cigarette or bottle of liquor in his hand, sometimes both. There were videos of him making out with people. Sometimes more than one person. Some of the faces I recognized from the films he had been in.
What stood out to me was how he was behaving. In some of the clips it was obvious he was high on something. Even in the clips where the paparazzi caught him walking down the street during the day. He looked disheveled and seemed fidgety and agitated as he responded to questions with smart ass remarks. This definitely wasn’t my Dieter.
What caught my attention the most were the types of women he surrounded himself with. They all looked the same, small and curvy with big chests and fish lips - very plastic. Very fake. Very Hollywood. More times than not, he was with multiple women and men as he left a club or after party. I couldn’t help wondering if that was something he was into. Was it his preference to be with multiple people at once? Would I be OK with that if it was? No, I wouldn’t. I don’t share.
I was spiraling again, realizing I wasn’t his usual flavor. Sure, I was fit with a dancer's body. However, where these women were soft, I was not. My body was lean and toned from a lifetime of movement. My boobs were damn near non-existent by their standards. I definitely didn’t have over inflated lips or a straight nose. I was suddenly feeling inadequate in every way when it came to Dieter’s preferences. I didn’t really understand what he saw in me if this was what he typically went for. And if he had a taste for multiples, he was definitely going to get bored with me because that is the one thing I would not do, even for him.
This line of thinking brought me back to the dancer connection, the chemical reaction that happens between two people who are forced into such intimate circumstances for an extended period of time. They bond and form an attachment that quickly fades. I had seen it happen so many times on this show, often fizzling out as soon as the season ended. But there were some couples that didn’t. Some of them were now happily married with a family.
I was questioning my own feelings now. How real were they? Was this just an infatuation? If his feelings were real, would I hurt him? Would he hurt me? He did seem to form attachments to his co-stars and quickly discard them. I didn’t understand why I was so confused. I felt lost. Deep down, I knew the majority of this stemmed from what Alec had put me through. I knew I needed to stop comparing Dieter to that asshole, but I couldn’t help it. Alec was my only real relationship prior to Dieter. It was the only comparison I had. Given Dieter’s history, it didn’t feel like that far of a stretch. However, I knew they were both in completely different places in their lives.
I sighed, tossing my phone on the table before digging my palms into my eyes. My mind was exhausted and so was my body. I reached behind me and pulled the small throw blanket off the back of the couch and covered myself up. I had only intended to take a quick nap, but it turned into something much longer.
It was near 6:30 AM when I awoke from my very restless sleep. My body ached from the crumpled up position I had been sleeping in. I puffed air out of my cheeks and reached for my phone, expecting to see a message from Dieter, but there was nothing.
I felt like shit because I didn’t even tell him goodnight and now he was probably upset. Or, maybe he was happy to have a break from me? I shook that thought away, standing and stretching as I moved toward the shower. I didn’t have a lot of time before I had to be at Television City Studios for show day, so everything turned into a rush.
Dieter was already there waiting with my coffee in hand. He gave me a tentative smile as I approached, taking the coffee from him and immediately inhaling a big gulp. I felt exhausted. I could already tell today would be a struggle.
My eyes met his as I wiped away the excess liquid on my upper lip, “Sorry I didn’t text or call last night. I completely knocked out on the couch, and now I feel like I slept on a bed of rocks.”
His brows pinched together, “Are you good to dance today?”
I nodded, “Yeah, I’ll be fine once I stretch and move around some. I’m just stiff.”
He stood staring at me, looking unconvinced as we were called up to do our camera blocking. I once again found myself zoning out and going through the motions. The routine felt flat because of it. I knew I would need to get it together before the live show or else it wasn’t going to go well.
I was in a daze as we went through our final fitting and hair and makeup. I could tell that Dieter was trying his best to carry the bulk of conversations for us as he snuck concerned glances my way. I tried to act normal, but it was getting harder as the day wore on. My mind was swimming with negative thoughts and they were beginning to overwhelm me. I knew this couldn’t continue. I needed to talk to Dieter about it. It was the only way to fix it. I decided I would after the show.
I was so lost in my thoughts that I forgot my phone as we moved to the staging area, which meant our whole pre-performance hype song tradition was broken. It didn’t seem to phase Dieter. He just shrugged it off saying it wasn’t a big deal. Instead, he pulled me to stand in front of him as we watched the couple before us dance. His arms wrapped around my shoulders, pulling me back against him.
I let his body heat sink into me, wrapping me up like a warm blanket. For a brief second, I forgot it all as I turned to glance up at him. He looked absolutely breathtaking. They had styled his hair in loose curls this time, allowing them to hang freely over his eyes. It was my favorite look on him so far. So much better than that slicked back bullshit they had been doing to him. The silky lavender button up he was wearing emphasized the broadness of his chest and shoulders, hugging his arms in a way that should be criminal.
He seemed to notice me admiring him, causing him to move his mouth close to my ear, close enough that I could feel his warm breath exhaling against it. “I don’t think I’ve told you how amazing you look today. I love this color on you.”
I glanced up at him with a smile that didn’t reach my eyes. It was nice to hear the compliment given that I found myself feeling extremely self conscious today, suddenly very aware of how small the dress made my boobs look. Fucking hell Kat, you’re being ridiculous.
The minutes seemed to shrink to seconds as we waited for our turn. It came much faster than I anticipated. Before I knew it, we were taking our places on the dance floor. As the opening notes of the piano sounded through the ballroom, Dieter approached me from behind, wrapping one arm around my waist to pull me back against him. His free hand rose to my cheek, turning my face so that I would look at him. His nose nuzzled against mine as he caressed down the curve of my neck. His eyes pulled me into a trance-like state, like they always seemed to do when we performed together. The fire between us was set ablaze as I let the lyrics of the song really fully settle into the pit of my gut for the first time. I felt every word, every syllable, and poured those emotions into our performance as he spun me around the dance floor.
A good portion of this routine had us making eye contact, lips grazing, hands gliding over bodies - it was probably our most intimate routine to date and it had me feeling everything. All the things that I had been desperately trying to shove into the box at the back of my mind were now strewn half haphazardly across my mind. It was overwhelming, causing the panic to bubble to the surface. I could feel it in every fiber of my being. I was terrified and unsure if I was ready to fully open my heart up to him, because if he didn’t want this, it would break me in a way that I knew I would struggle to come back from.
I wasn’t strong enough to do this. Even though I didn’t feel this strongly for Alec, he still hurt me. I hadn’t realized how bad until this moment. I was still guarding my heart, struggling to knock down the wall that surrounded it, convinced my relationship with Dieter would eventually meet the same end…because I would never be enough.
I knew Dieter could sense the turmoil in my thoughts. I could see it on his face. It didn’t take long before the tears were prickling at my eyes. I could see his nostrils flare as our eyes met, the panic was spreading to him now. I swear he knew what I was thinking as he seemed to try and reassure me with his eyes and his touch.
Once we reached the end of the song, he surprised me by pulling me into his arms rather than doing a dip as planned. His hands found my cheeks as he pressed his forehead against mine. I could faintly hear him over the roar of the crowd asking me if I was ok as the lights dimmed. I couldn’t speak, because if I did, I would fall apart. So, I shook my head. He leaned in next to my ear and hugged me, “It’s ok, I’ve got you. I’m here.”
When the lights popped back on, I peered up at him with tears in my eyes. He let out a controlled breath before pulling me along behind him to our interview spot. It took everything in me to hold it together through the judges' comments. I could feel Dieter’s arms tensing around me, his embrace tightening like he was trying to hold me together. It was obvious he was distracted as he rambled through his responses to whatever questions he was being asked as he shot worried glances my way.
I knew I had to look like a lunatic on camera with my unblinking gaze fixed on nothing as the storm brewed inside. My breathing was slowly becoming more shallow as I fought back tears, because in that moment I knew that I couldn’t do this. My feelings for him were too much - all consuming. I had never felt anything this intense in my life and it scared the hell out of me. I knew this thing between us was absolutely going to destroy me if I let it go any further. If I gave that last piece of myself over to him, and he decided he wanted to move on after this, I wouldn’t survive it.
I didn’t register what our scores were, simply going through the motions as Dieter forced a smile and hugged me against his side. Once they gave the signal that the camera was no longer on us, I pulled away, intent on going to my dressing room before I completely broke down in front of everyone. I couldn’t be in the middle of all the chaos of the show right now, I needed to be somewhere where I could breathe.
By the time I stepped into the hallway, I was struggling for air as tears flooded my vision. I could hear Dieter behind me brushing off questions from the cast and crew as he trailed behind me. He called my name several times as he ran to catch up to me just as I was entering my dressing room. I moved to shut the door before he could enter, but his large hand stopped it. I looked up, our eyes connecting through the crack. I could see the panic on his pleading face, like he already knew.
“Kat, talk to me. Please.”
I couldn’t hold back anymore, turning away from him as I buried my face in my hands and fought back the sobs that were threatening to break free. I heard the door close behind me, then his hands were on my shoulders, pulling me toward him. I shrugged him off and stepped away. When I finally turned to face him, the tears were flowing freely. Am I really gonna do this? Yes. Yes, I am.
The look on his face nearly split my heart in half and had me second guessing everything.
“Dieter…I-I don’t think I can do this anymore.”
He shook his head from side to side, “Kat, don’t… please.”
“I’m sorry, it’s…just too much…and I don’t know if any of what we’re feeling is real. I think…I think we just need to put on the brakes, at least until the show’s over. This is just too much, too fast. I can’t do it.”
Understanding seemed to cross his expression, “You think this is just another on set fling for me?”
I sighed, “I-I don’t know. The circumstances we’re in, it’s not unusual for dance partners to have intense emotions like this. What we do, it requires a lot of trust and a bond that doesn’t always last after the dancing ends.”
He came closer, hands reaching for me, but pausing to pull back at the last minute, “So, then we don’t stop dancing. I’ll do whatever I have to do to keep you in my life, Kat.”
His voice broke as he spoke. He was on the verge of tears himself now.
I backed away, shaking my head, determined to stick to my decision. “I can’t. This was a bad idea. It was too soon, for the both of us.”
His hands fisted at his sides as the tears slid down his cheeks, “I asked you…and you said you were sure. I told you from the beginning that I can’t go back to the way things were before. I meant it when I said it was all or nothing for me…and you said you were sure.”
The memory of that night on the terrace in New York flooded all of my senses. The thrill and excitement that I had been feeling left no room in my mind to consider the consequences of our actions. All I knew then was that I wanted him, consequences be damned. I never imagined we would end up here.
He sighed, wiping at his face. “I know…my history doesn’t work in my favor, OK? I realize that…but I’m not that person anymore. Any remaining pieces of that person completely disappeared the moment I walked into that dance studio the first day. All those times before, they meant nothing to me and I’ve told you that. I didn’t have feelings for any of those people. I don’t even remember half of them…I wasn’t in a good place…I just wanted to feel something, but I didn’t. I was numb to it all…until you. I need you to understand that.”
My heart was shattering seeing him like this. His response was visceral and raw. He was saying all the right things. I wanted to believe him, but I had been here before. I had heard a similar plea from Alec the first time he fucked up. I wanted to trust Dieter. My gut was telling me that I could, but my heart was building the wall taller. I stood in silence, watching every emotion play out on his face as I thought through things. He looked almost hopeful as I began to speak, but it quickly faded.
“I - I…can’t. I just can’t. I wasn’t ready for this…I didn’t expect to…” fall in love with you.
My words trailed off. I couldn’t say it out loud, realizing this was the first time that I had ever actually been in love with someone. I don’t know what it was with Alec, but it wasn’t this. It was nothing close to this.
I shook my head, “I’m sorry, Dieter. I can’t go through this again.”
His mouth fell open as he huffed out a breath, “You…don’t believe that I’ve changed?”
Fuck. That wasn’t what I was implying at all. I shook my head, “Dieter, no…I...”
He held up his hand, rolling his lips together as he nodded, like he understood everything now. He seemed stoic all of a sudden, his distant eyes roaming over me like it was the last time before turning toward the door. He didn’t even bother to close it behind him as he disappeared down the hallway.
My heart shattered into a million pieces as realization set in. I could sugar coat it all I wanted, but he wasn’t wrong. When I dug down to the root of the issue, it was because of his past. The seed had been planted and completely poisoned my thoughts and emotions against him. I had unintentionally done the one thing that would cut him the deepest, I didn’t believe in him - I didn’t believe he had changed.
I didn’t know where to start or how to handle this. So, I did the only thing I could do at that moment. I moved to close the door, then turned to press my back against it. After sliding down to sit on the floor, I pulled my knees to my chest and buried my face to muffle the sobs that raked through my body. I had made such a mess of everything, handling it in the worst way possible and completely fucking it all up.
Tonight, I would go home. To my home - alone. I would spend the night replaying the last few weeks over and over in my mind, chastising myself as I tried to figure out where things went wrong and what I actually wanted. I felt overwhelmed and broken for reasons that had absolutely nothing to do with Dieter, yet he was the one being punished and I was the one punishing him.
Next: Week 9
✨Your Viennese Waltz video for this chapter can be found HERE. It's a steamy one. 😏
Hello my lovelies! Finally! A new chapter! Yay! 😬
Are you ready to come at me with pitch forks now? We knew the honeymoon period could only last so long, right? Kat has been in her head about this the whole time. I was surprised more people didn't see it coming...I think there was only one that sort of got it?
So, this chapter was a little different. We were very much in Kat's head and focused less on what was happening around her because she was focused less on it. Though...there was that steamy quality time with Dieter that she was very present for. 🤭
And before you ask, I did not list this week's song on purpose. There is a reason. We will find out what it was later...but there are hints. If someone can figure it out, I'll be nice and answer any question you have, even if it's a spoiler. 😏
The next chapter is going to be a doozy. There will be more angst. Dieter is going to have a little bit of a blow up (on camera). Kat has another conversation with her sister and it goes about like you might expect it to. There is so much scheming going on from Stacia, Joe, and Anika! Dieter struggles a bit and we get a classic misunderstanding. And something I'm sort of excited about...one of the characters we love to hate might get a little bit of a redemption arc. Any guesses on who?
Until next time,
💜Mysty
P.S. It seems some of my minor edits were not saved. If you see errors, that's on me because I'm too lazy to go through it all again. 😅
Closed Position Masterlist ||| Main Masterlist
Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)
Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble.
Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo.
Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.
Chapter Word Count: 28.5k (I went off the rails again.)
👉 Warnings: Themes dealing with intimate partner violence (not by or toward Dieter), past alcohol abuse, and past drug abuse. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Dieter Bravo comes with his own warnings.
👉 Chapter Warnings: Dieter and Kat both being a menace, smut, fluff, angst in the form of discussions about childhood trauma (including homophobic comments)
Chapter Quote:
“I actually meant what I said earlier…I’m bending you over the counter and fucking you when we get back to the house.”
Kat’s POV
When I awoke on Tuesday morning, my body felt strangely satiated after the previous evening's exploits. My mind, however, was swirling with more thoughts and emotions than I could process. My first thoughts were of the way Dieter had taken care of me in every way possible after the show. He brought me home, made an amazing dinner, and ran a hot bath as he promised. He joined me in the tub, massaging my neck, shoulders, and back as he his lips trailed behind his hands - managing to get me completely relaxed and turned on in the process. He followed that with a scalp massage as he washed the product from my hair before rinsing with the handheld sprayer. I offered to wash his in return since it still had all of the gel in it from the show, but he refused, instead drying me off and sending me to bed while he jumped in the shower. I didn’t even bother to get dressed, choosing to collapse into the fluffy duvet completely naked.
I was lying stretched out on my stomach when Dieter came out of the bathroom and crawled up my body, continuing where he left off as he massaged my thighs and hips for several minutes. He eventually moved upward, peppering kisses along my spine until he reached my neck. I tilted my head to give him better access as he rubbed his patchy beard against my skin. The length of his body pressed against mine, which made it obvious he was aroused.
His teeth grazed my earlobe, causing me to moan and arch my ass upward into him. He nipped and sucked at my neck as he pressed his hard length against me. My hand found its way to the hair at the top of his head, tugging slightly as I told him I needed him again. He wasted no time, positioning himself at my entrance and slowly sinking in. He covered my body with his, pinning me to the bed as he began his steady, but slow rhythm. After propping himself up on his left elbow, his hand found mine and entwined our fingers together, squeezing it tightly. His right hand roamed my body before finding a home under my chin, tilting my head back so he could give me an upside-down kiss on the lips.
As things got more intense, I collapsed, face down into the plush bedding as he continued to lavish my neck and shoulder with attention from his mouth. My fingers tangled in his hair again as I turned my head to search for his lips. After a passionate kiss, he pulled away and rested his forehead against the side of my temple. We stayed like that for a time, inhaling each other's breath and getting lost in the sensations that our bodies were creating as we moved as one.
It was almost foreign to me, how he could make any position feel that intimate. It didn’t matter if we could stare deeply into each other's eyes or not, I could still feel the connection with him. It was there in the way he touched and held me. Our bodies communicated in ways I had never experienced - using all the senses to bond us together. I surmised that it had to be because of the way that we spent our time together, building something that I couldn’t really understand or explain.
The past week with Dieter had been strangely domesticated. It was full of homemade meals and lots of cuddling. He stuck to his word about keeping this thing between us as something more, not always turning to sex for a connection. He really was putting in the effort to experience all forms of intimacy, always looking out for me and taking care of me in ways that Alec had never even tried. I hated him doing so much, but he wouldn’t have it any other way. Even when things would get heated between us, he would keep his focus on me and expect nothing in return. Always being perfectly satisfied with a good cuddle and head scratches.
However, after all of our incredibly intimate moments, I still felt like he was holding something back. I could see it in his eyes, often swimming with some sort of emotion. I didn’t want to push him because I knew he would open up eventually. I did sometimes worry that he was hiding something that he thought might upset me. For as connected as we were, it still felt like parts of him were a mystery.
Those thoughts didn’t seem to dampen my need to be near him though. The one night I went home to rest because I wasn’t feeling well was strangely lonely and unsettling. I didn’t get a lot of sleep, having thoughts of Alec sneaking in under the cover of darkness and choking me in my slumber definitely didn’t help. I hadn’t felt that anxious since the incident, now realizing it was because of Dieter. He was keeping those fears away without even trying. They were gone as soon as I reunited with him. When I went to his house the following night, I fell asleep without a worry in the world because he was there with me.
I did appreciate Dieter’s need to focus on intimacy outside of sex. We managed a whole week without it, but after all the closeness of the week and the fire that blazed between us during our Argentine Tango performance, I couldn’t hold out anymore. I shocked myself when I suggested we fuck in the dressing room. That was one thing I had never done even though Alec tried to initiate it multiple times. I was always too worried about getting caught. It was different with Dieter though. He was slowly waking something up inside of me that I didn’t recognize. The way I craved him had reached a boiling point and I couldn’t fight it anymore. I wanted him in every way he would let me have him.
I had never really been a fan of rough sex in the past, but as with everything else, it was different with Dieter. There was the connection between us of course, but he was also passionate. He somehow managed to turn it into something else, full of emotion and sensuality. It was a lot to process and to be honest, the sheer aching need that I had for him was scaring the hell out of me. He was quickly becoming an addiction for me. The way he made me feel confident, desired, and cared for was all the things that I had been missing, and it was thrilling. Even as my brain shouted at me to slow things down, my body craved him. After fucking in the dressing room, I still needed more.
As his body moved against mine, his scent completely engulfed me - making me feel intoxicated by him. My skin was tingling from his affectionate touches, my lips burning from his passionate kisses, and my heart skipping beats from whatever this emotion was that was taking over my very being. His soft sighs and deep groans against my ear sent shivers down my spine and had me coming undone underneath him in no time. He followed soon after, nearly collapsing on top of me before moving to the left, still half draped across my body.
His hands ghosted over my skin as he placed the occasional kiss on my shoulder, eventually dozing off for the night after flipping the duvet over us. That was how we still found ourselves this morning, his steady exhales blowing against the base of my neck, causing my skin to break out in goosebumps. I could feel the weight of Zee laying across my feet, both of them cocooning me in warmth. Everything about it felt so right, yet a little voice in the back of my head still questioned it. It was almost too good to be true.
Dieter stirred, nuzzling his face further into the crook of my neck as he inhaled deeply and hugged me tighter against him.
My sleep filled voice greeted him, “Good morning.”
He sighed as he kissed my shoulder, “Morning, beautiful.”
To Zee’s dismay, I turned over to face him. She grumbled as she got situated again. We both snickered at her before turning our attention back to each other. I could partially make out a crease down the side of his face from laying on the blanket. I smiled as I ran my finger along it. “You sleep well?” I finally asked.
He smiled and nodded against the pillow, “So good. It’s so much better with you here.”
I felt my heart flutter as his chocolate eyes danced around my face. I could see that strange look there again, like he wanted to say something but didn’t.
I cleared my throat, “You ready for another production meeting this morning?”
He rolled his eyes, inhaling deeply before answering. “I don’t see why we have to meet with them every week. Can’t they just send that shit in an email?”
I chuckled, “They could…but then they couldn’t be nosey and try to make drama for the show.”
“Ugh, such bullshit. Why can’t they just let the show be about dancing?”
I gave him a tight smile, “That’s not how they get high ratings.”
Dieter's phone rang on the nightstand, ruining our morning chat. He sighed, turning to grab the shrilling device and finding his agent’s name flashing across the screen. He pressed ‘answer’ and brought it to his ear, “You should know better than to call me this early in the morning, Lenny.”
I could hear a deep chuckle on the other end of the line, “Sorry to call you so early, D…but we have a potential issue. There are rumors circulating that there was a serious altercation with you and Kat’s ex last week. Is there any truth to that? Does that have anything to do with the schedule changes?”
Dieter puffed air out of his cheeks as he glanced over at me. He had obviously kept his agent in the dark about that.
“There was…a minor incident. He attacked Kat and I pulled him off her. They did change our schedules around so that Kat doesn’t have to be near him.”
“Damnit Dieter…can you please stay out of trouble? You’re on the upswing right now…”
I could tell Dieter was frustrated as his jaw tensed. “Sorry Len, but I’m not gonna stand by while someone close to me gets mistreated. I’m sure the public can understand that.”
Lenny sighed loudly into the phone, “Fine…you’re right. I’ll get Janine on it and see if she can put out the fire. If you get any questions about it, don’t answer them. Maybe it’ll go away. I’m told there are some pap pics of the guy though…and his face is busted up. So, I’m not sure if it will.”
Dieter’s brows furrowed, “Is he saying anything about it?”
“No, it’s mostly speculation I think…but they know for sure there have been schedule changes. It’s TMZ, you know how they draw conclusions about shit.”
Dieter nodded, “Yeah, well…my lips are sealed. I’m confident Janine can handle it as long as that douchebag isn’t running his mouth. I’m sure he doesn’t want people to know about it anyway.”
The call ended soon after that as it was time for us to get ready for our production meeting. It wasn’t long before we found ourselves sitting in front of our two favorite people, Stacia and Joe. They were unusually pleasant, making small talk and checking in with me to make sure I was doing ok, and that Alec hadn’t been out of line since they had apparently had a conversation with him after our last meeting. Stacia, of course, complemented our last performance, making a point to mention how great our chemistry was on the dance floor. She was fishing for anything she could get her hands on, but we gave her nothing. We politely thanked her and redirected our conversation to this week's performance.
I had to bite back a groan when Joe gave us our dance for the week, the Paso Doble with a traditional Spanish style song called Uccen. It was definitely going to wear me out. I had a feeling Dieter would enjoy it since the dance was more focused on the man’s performance, but I could already envision him whining about how tired he was.
They handed over the costume sketches, putting us both in all red again, which wasn’t unusual. Black and red were pretty typical looks for this dance. My costume had a Spanish feel to it with layers of fabric that bunched up in the back. It was shorter in the front and very flowy. It had a halter top with the same flowy fabric draped to cover the necessary areas, leaving the back completely open. They had Dieter in a red suit with a textured button up shirt. After approving the looks, we were pretty much done with the meeting. I was thankful this one was drama free. I did not need my day ruined by them.
After the meeting, we continued our tradition of grabbing lunch together. We settled on a small cafe nearby. The staff seated us on the outdoor patio, so we made sure to be on our best behavior because there were eyes everywhere. We were even approached by a few fans to take pictures and happily obliged. Dieter was all smiles as he interacted with them, seeming perfectly at ease while I was still trying to get used to having this much attention from strangers. He seemed to sense my anxiousness, smiling gently as he reached over to give my hand a quick squeeze after they left us.
(More after the graphic.)
We were off to the dance studio for rehearsals after that, beginning the week like we always did, by listening to our song. Dieter’s head bobbed along with the fast-paced Spanish and mediterranean style guitars mixed with folk undertones. It was obvious this would be different from anything we had done thus far.
Once the music concluded, I clapped my hands together dramatically, “Ok, Bravo. You’re probably about to love and hate this dance.”
His brows furrowed, “Why?”
I huffed out a laugh, “Because it’s dramatic and fun, but it’s also gonna wear your ass out.”
His brows arched as he gave me a wide-eyed stare, “I mean, you do that already.”
I rolled my eyes and fought a smile as I stood from where we were seated on the floor, then pulled him up to join me.
“So, the Paso Doble comes from sixteenth century Spain and France. It literally translates to ‘double step’ and it’s very high energy and very…theatrical…meant to imitate a bullfighter and his cape. You would be the matador in this instance…the star of the show. I need you to have strong posture and emote power with your body and facial expressions. I’ll be your cape, with more graceful and fluid movements at times. We’re gonna be doing sort of a marching style rhythm with staccato footwork along with that. Like I said, it’s fun…but tiring.”
Dieter gave me a tight smile, “Can we look at some videos of this before we get started? I feel like that might help get me going. I have a feeling what I’m envisioning ain’t it.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at him. At least he was honest. He went into full work mode after that, studying each video I pulled up for him. After an hour of video watching and making notes on some things that stood out to us, we got started on the basics. He picked those up quickly, allowing us to begin planning our choreography.
As predicted, Dieter was gasping for air and whining about being exhausted before the rehearsal time was over. Not that I could blame him, I was too. And it was only the first day. He was doing amazing though, and I made sure to tell him as much. I knew he would enjoy the theatrics of this dance which helped make up for how much work was involved.
We basically crashed when we got back to his place. After seven and a half hours of going non-stop, we were spent. We barely had the energy to eat dinner and shower before climbing into bed early, tangling ourselves up together and zonking out for the night.
We started our Wednesday morning off with Dieter receiving a text from Janine, his publicist. It was a link to a newly posted TMZ article.
I watched as he leaned across the kitchen island and scanned the article. His eyes crossed as he let out an annoyed groan and passed the phone to me.
(More after the graphic.)
Dieterina Spotted Getting Cozy During Lunch After Alleged On-Set Drama
Dancing with the Stars (DWTS) fan favorites Dieter Bravo and Katarina Stamos were spotted having lunch at a LA cafe yesterday. Witnesses say they seemed very cozy and touchy during their meal in between posing for pictures with fans.
This sighting comes after rumors began to circulate about a possible altercation between Dieter and Kat’s ex, professional dancer Alec Balaska, after last week's live show. If you recall, Dieter and Kat set the ballroom ablaze with their sultry performance and intense chemistry during their Argentine Tango, which earned them a perfect score for the week. It’s easy to see how that could have caused tensions to rise backstage. We have no confirmation that Dieter and Kat are officially an item, but they definitely seem to be getting close.
TMZ sources have not confirmed the altercation took place, but we can confirm there have been schedule changes that appear to have happened in an effort to keep Dieter and Kat separated from Alec as much as possible. It must also be noted that Kat did not dance with the same group as Alec during last week’s professional performances, which could help back those claims.
Alec was spotted out and about in LA with his DWTS partner and new love interest, Lana Thompson, earlier this week. He appeared to have bruises on his face but gave no response as to how he got them. His reps refused to comment. We reached out to Dieter’s publicist who also refused to comment on the situation.
Included with the article were pictures of Dieter and I at the cafe. There were several with his hand resting atop mine as he smiled my way. There were also several zoomed in stills of our Argentine Tango performance along with an embedded video and pictures of Alec and Lana seated in Alec’s car.
I sighed, “They really will post anything for clicks, won’t they?”
Dieter nodded, “Yep, bullshit…as usual. For all they know, he could have fallen on his face during rehearsal. It’s plausible…I’ve done it enough to know.”
I chuckled, nodding in agreement. Just as I was about to hand Dieter’s phone back, a text popped up. There was no name, only a number. I felt my stomach drop when I unintentionally read the message.
646-333-4545: It was nice bumping into you. Call me, so we can get together. I do miss having your mouth on me. 😉
I slid the phone toward him as I tried to control my breathing, “Umm…you have a text.”
He picked up his phone, brows furrowing in confusion as he read it. “I have no idea who that is…I’ve not bumped into anyone.”
I watched as he swiped, then selected ‘block’ on the screen.
I didn’t say anything, but my face must have. When he finally looked at me, I could see the worry in his eyes.
He began shaking his head as he approached me, “I swear I don’t know who that is…maybe that actress from New York? I haven’t bumped into anyone besides her…I didn’t even have the number saved. I-I’ve been getting a lot of texts like this since SNL…people trying to hit me up to party. I’ve blocked them all, you can check. Maybe I just need to get a new number…I deleted everyone I didn’t need to talk to when I got out of rehab. I swear…”
The longer he rambled, the more panicked he sounded. I took a deep centering breath, realizing I needed to give him some leniency. It was obvious he didn’t have the number saved, and that bitch had been pushy.
He continued, “I’ll get a new number, OK? I was thinking about doing it anyway because I’m pretty sure one of my dealers texted me the other day…I blocked him…just so we’re clear.”
I gave him a tight smile as I reached to cup his cheek, “Hey, it's OK. I believe you.”
He visibly relaxed into my touch, “I’m sorry. I don’t want you to think I’m doing shady shit, because I’m not. I won’t do that to you.”
The rational part of my brain finally caught up to my emotions. We've spent ninety-five percent of our time together since we got back from New York. I would have noticed something if he was talking to other people. He was rarely on his phone, and when he was, I was usually at his side looking at it with him as we watched funny videos together.
I pulled him in for a hug, “It’s OK. I have no reason to think you’re lying.”
He backed away, “Imma text Evan right now actually…and have him take care of all that. I want zero doubts.”
And he did text Evan after that. I never would have asked him to change his number, but the fact that he offered and got right on it did make me feel better. Alec never would have offered. It was another reminder of how completely different they were.
Dieter made sure to take a few minutes to apologize, cuddling on the couch before I had to leave for the professional's dance rehearsal and him for his weekly therapy session. By the time I walked out the door with promises to meet up with him at the dance studio for our evening rehearsal, the whole incident was an afterthought.
The professional’s dance rehearsal definitely had a new vibe. I could tell other cast members were looking at me differently - curiosity maybe? I tried not to pay them any attention, allowing Marc to distract me from it when we weren’t receiving instructions. He and Stefanie both had become allies in this whole mess. Given that they knew what actually happened, I had to respect that they were keeping the information quiet while not so subtly choosing a side. Marc had mentioned that people were asking him what he knew, but he refused to comment. He really was a good guy, I hadn’t given him enough credit for that in the past.
Once we wrapped up rehearsal for the day, I made my way over to grab my water bottle. As I took small sips, I picked up my phone to scroll through the missed notifications. I had a text message from my sister asking why she hadn’t heard from me and telling me to call her. Since I had been spending all of my free time with Dieter, I had pretty much gone radio silent with her. I shot her a quick response, promising to call her the following day since we had a late rehearsal.
I was silently debating if I should tell my sister about my relationship with Dieter as I moved on to the Instagram notifications. My brows furrowed when I came to the notification that said, ‘bangingbravo1 was live (45 min ago)’. Well, that’s new.
I quickly collected my things, telling Marc goodbye as I made my way to the car. After tossing my bag into the back, I sank down into the driver’s seat, pulling my phone out as I closed and locked the doors. My curiosity was making me anxious to see what Dieter was up to since this wasn’t something he normally did. I wasted no time opening Instagram and clicking the notification. He was no longer live, but the video was posted to his story.
It appeared that he was sitting in the same spot he had been in when he and I played guitars together all those weeks ago. His black acoustic sat perched on his lap as he briefly fiddled with the camera. He then proceeded to strum and tune the instrument for a short time before glancing up and smiling, welcoming his growing number of viewers. He took a few minutes, answering questions that popped up - some about Zee, some about his plants. Someone must have asked about me, causing him to smirk as he explained that I was at dance rehearsal for the professionals, noting that he and I would be rehearsing later in the day. Then he cleared his throat, getting to the reason for going live.
“So…I’ve been getting a lot of messages and comments asking me to do more playing and singing. I hear you…so, we’re gonna give this a try and see how it goes.”
A soft curl fell down over his eyes as he glanced down to place his hands and began strumming a bluesy intro. His demeanor shifted, seeming almost melancholy as he began to sing.
This song has two very different versions and I love both. Give them a listen.
🎶Version 1 🎶 Version 2
When the sins of my father / Weigh down in my soul / And the pain of my mother / Will not let me go / Well, I know there can come fire from the sky / To refine the purest of kings / And even though I know this fire brings me pain / Even so, And just the same
His voice was full of emotion and grit as his unblinking eyes fixed on something just out of frame. He sounded soulful, but there was an edge of pain to the lyrics as they appeared to have deeper meaning to him. I knew him well enough to know that he was feeling the words, seeming to dredge up old memories or feelings. It had me wondering what he had discussed with his therapist that morning, because I knew he didn’t pick that song at random. Music was an outlet for him. It meant something.
All seed needs the water / Before it grows out of the ground / But it just keeps on getting hard / And the hunger more profound / Well, I know there can come tears from the eyes / But they may as well all be in vain / Even though I know these tears come with pain / Even so, And just the same
His line of sight drifted, appearing to focus on nothing as he took on a far-away look. A deep crease formed between his brows, his eyes turning somewhat glassy as he belted out the next verse. I had never seen him like this, but I knew that look all too well from experience. He was reliving something from his past. Something painful that had potentially shaped him into the man he had become - both the old and new version of himself.
And let the clouds fill with thunderous applause / And let lightning be the veins / And fill the sky with all that they can drop / When it's time to make a change
As he finished out the song with the last few refrains of the chorus, I realized tears were streaming down my cheeks. Every hair on my body was standing on end as my flesh pebbled from the sound of his voice. I could feel it in my soul. The connection that he and I seemed to share only made me feel it that much deeper. I couldn’t recall anything ever having affected me like this before.
After the last lyric left his lips, he inhaled deeply to center himself. He sat silently for a beat, then his eyes flicked up to the camera. They were pools of emotion as he gave a small smile that didn’t reach his eyes. He was obviously reading the flood of comments filling the stream. Then he finally spoke.
“You all are too kind…it’s more than I probably deserve.”
He paused, swallowing thickly as he continued to read the comments. He nodded, “I’ll uhh, yeah, I’ll do another live soon…thank you.”
After saying his goodbyes, the stream ended. I had to take a moment to pull myself together. We were supposed to meet at the dance studio for rehearsal in an hour and a half, but I couldn’t wait. Something told me that I needed to go to him. So, I did.
When I got to his house, I knocked and rang the doorbell, but there was no answer. Figuring he was still upstairs and maybe couldn’t hear it, I tried the doorknob. To my surprise, it was unlocked. So, I let myself in and headed toward his sanctuary.
I found him with wireless headphones on, slouched back into the chair and lazily strumming the strings on his guitar. He still had that vacant far-away look in his eyes as he stared at nothing. My movement in the doorway must have caught his attention because his eyes snapped toward me as he paused his motions.
His brows furrowed as he pulled the headphones off, giving a small smile as he asked, “What are you doing here? I thought we were meeting at the dance studio?”
Moving toward him, I could tell something was off. He looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders, and I hated it. As I stood in front of him, our gazes met. He sighed, then placed the guitar back on its stand next to the chair and set the headphones on the floor beside it. His eyes met mine as he worried at his bottom lip with his teeth.
“Are you OK?” I finally asked.
His shoulders slumped as he leaned back in his seat and scratched at his patchy beard, now avoiding my gaze.
“No. But I’m gettin’ there. One day at a time…”
My feet carried me forward as I reached to run my hands through the top of his messy curls. He sighed as his arms found their way around my waist, pulling me to him so he could rest his head against my chest. I needed to be closer, shifting so that I could raise first the right, then the left leg to straddle his lap. He hugged me tighter as he buried his face into the curve of my neck and inhaled deeply. I could feel him relaxing more and more with each breath that he took.
He lifted his head, pressing it against mine as he hugged me just a little tighter.
“Thank you for coming. I needed this…needed you.”
My nose brushed against his, “You have me. Tell me what you need from me.”
He shook his head, “I…I don’t know.”
My right hand moved to his chest. I could feel his heart thrumming away under my palm as his eyes pooled with tears and his breathing became shallow. He seemed lost. I needed to bring him back and ground him to the present.
After extracting myself from his embrace, I stood, taking his hand and leading him to the bedroom. I pulled him into a deep kiss, eventually breaking away to slowly undress him and trail soft touches and kisses along his body. His hands explored every inch of newly exposed skin as I undressed myself next. Once we were bare, I led him to the bed where we both lay down facing each other. He pulled me against him, tangling limbs together as we held each other. His face found its way back to the curve of my neck as he took deep and steady breaths to calm himself. I cradled his head against me, gently running my fingers through his fluffy curls to soothe him.
We stayed like that for a time. Strangely, it didn’t feel sexual at all. Yet, it had to be one of the most intimate moments I had ever experienced with another person. He was showing me his vulnerability, sharing his pain with me as our bare skin touched from head to toe - allowing ourselves to be connected physically and emotionally without judgement. The intensity of it was scary but also mixed with a strange feeling of relief and security. It was a hard feeling to wrap my head around as I tried to stay present for him.
Once his breathing settled to normal, he pulled away to meet my gaze with a serene expression. His eyes danced around my face as his hand glided up and down the side of my body. I would give anything to know what was going on in his head at that moment. The way he was looking at me caused the air to crackle around us. It felt like there was something he wanted to say, but instead, he leaned forward and captured my lips with his. It was slow, passionate, and needy.
We melted into each other, further deepening the connection that I currently felt humming between us. As I moved against him, touching and tasting his skin, I could feel his hardness growing and rubbing against my center. He groaned into my mouth as I began to grind against it, coating his length in my arousal. He wasted no time shifting so that he was between my thighs and sinking in to the hilt as he caged me in between his arms. His hips didn’t move, but he continued to kiss me deeply as I hugged him tightly.
Several minutes passed before we broke apart. His hips finally began their painfully slow thrusts as we got lost in each other's eyes. This didn’t feel like it was about the sex for him. Maybe it was his way of staying grounded in the present. Or, perhaps it was about strengthening whatever bond was forming between us. Maybe it was even a little bit of both. There were definitely some strong emotions swirling around us as we moved together. It was almost overwhelming, causing my chest to tighten and tears to prickle at the corners of my eyes.
There was no question about it now, I was in love with him. It ran deeper than it ever had with Alec or anyone else. The realization caused my heart to race as the anxiety set in. Was this too fast? Too soon? We’re either of us really ready for this?
Dieter seemed to sense the shift in my thoughts, reaching to run his fingertips down the side of my face as he nudged his nose against mine. It helped calm me some but did nothing to dampen the sudden and intense rush of emotions I was feeling for him.
The languid pace in which he was moving drew out how long this all lasted, but it felt right. We were completely lost in each other, causing the world around us to blur and cease to exist. It was the slowest build to a release that I had ever experienced. When I finally fell over the edge, it was intense and euphoric, seeming to go on forever. I felt like I was floating and the only thing keeping me tethered to this plane was Dieter. He followed behind me soon after, unable to hold it back as my walls contracted around him. He pressed his forehead against mine, his eyes clenching shut as he spilled into me with a deep groan that turned to quiet whimpers with the last few thrusts of his hips.
He sighed heavily against my lips, clearly savoring the high he was riding after his release. I peppered small kisses around his face as I brushed back his sweaty curls. His dark eyes finally opened, meeting mine before capturing my mouth with his. He broke away to catch his breath, both of us still gulping for air as we took each other in.
He eventually shifted to lay facing me as I turned toward him. His hand slid around my waist to pull me closer. We were nose to nose when he finally spoke, “I think I should maybe tell you why I had such a strong reaction to the Alec thing…it’s sort of the root of everything…why I am the way I am…”
I took a deep breath, “Ok…but I don’t want you to feel like you have to. Only tell me if you want to…and if you’re ready.”
He nodded, “I want to…I think it’ll help you understand me a little better…and…my therapist thinks I should tell you too.”
I gave him a small smile as I reached to scratch at the scruff on his cheek, continuing to lazily rub in circles as he began to speak.
“I…didn’t have the best childhood growing up. My dad…he was an asshole. I can’t remember a time when he didn’t abuse my mom, but it got progressively worse over the years. I couldn’t tell you how many times I sat with her or tried to take care of her after he bloodied her up. I remember always feeling helpless when I was younger…I wanted to protect her, but I couldn’t.”
He paused, sighing heavily as he reached for my hand that was still rubbing at his scruff and entwined our fingers to rest on the bed between us.
“Of course, that was when she still cared about life…about me. At some point she started drinking…which ultimately made things worse with him. It got to the point where she stayed wasted all the time and didn’t really seem to care about anything. By the time I was a teenager, I was pretty much taking care of myself. My dad left me alone for the most part, until I started interfering with their fights…trying to protect her.”
He swallowed thickly as his eyes turned glassy, “I thought…maybe if I could protect her…that I could get her back…matter to her again. You know what I mean? I just felt so alone…abandoned even…just existing. It only made things worse though. My dad no longer held back from directing his anger at me and it just seemed to push my mom further away.”
He scoffed as he squeezed my hand a little tighter, “Hell, there were times I think she was happy he was taking it out on someone besides her.”
I could see the pain that realization caused him as a deep crease formed between his brows. He stared, unblinking, at our intertwined hands as he continued.
“When I was in high school, I joined the drama club. For once, I had several close friends. That’s when I realized my sexual preferences…varied…and I started exploring my preferences within that group. Anyway, there was this one guy I spent a lot of time with. It wasn’t serious, but we had a thing. I guess someone saw us together at the mall and we were obvious about it. Word got back to my dad, and he absolutely lost his shit over it. No son of his was gonna be like that. He called me every slur you can think of while he tried to ‘beat the gayness out of me’. That was one of the times I snapped on him. I got in a few good hits, but he still beat the hell out of me.”
The tears finally spilled down his cheeks. He sniffled a little before he continued.
“It was pretty bad…and the sad part was…my mom couldn’t bother to care. She didn’t check on me once. After spending a day in bed and feeling like I was dying, I managed to drag myself over to Evan’s house. I lied and told everyone I got mugged. His mom ended up taking me to the ER…I had a concussion and a couple of broken ribs. Of course, all my parents cared about was the astronomical hospital bill.”
It was my turn for tears now. My heart was breaking for him. I squeezed his hand tighter as I gave him a sympathetic look.
He sighed and finally met my gaze, “It got pretty unbearable after that. I couldn’t stand being at home. My dad was constantly belittling me and saying things that made me feel like I was a dirty abomination. My mom even said she was disappointed in my behavior at one point...I think that’s when I really started to hate myself. I didn’t feel like I was worthy of being loved or happy…I started having some pretty dark thoughts.”
He paused briefly, chewing on the inside of his cheek as he considered what to say next.
“Eventually…Evan’s mom took me in after she figured out what was going on. She helped me through the emancipation process so they couldn’t have control over me anymore…but the damage was done. I had already started self-medicating with alcohol…and after I got my big break in Hollywood with money to burn, the slow spiral started. Honestly, I’m not even sure how I’m still alive after some of the shit I’ve done.”
“What made you finally wanna change things?” I asked.
He shrugged, “After my third overdose, my agent gave me an ultimatum…either get sober or I was done. None of the studios wanted to work with me anymore because I was a liability…and by that point Evan had quit working for me. He was tired of my shit. I was also damn near bankrupt. Everything just sort of converged and blew up on me at once. So, I took that last stint in rehab seriously. I had sort of an epiphany about getting my life together and wanted to learn how to be happy…exercise the demons out of my life. Somehow, I found a way to do it, but it’s still a struggle some days. Sometimes I get triggered and wanna go back to that dark place…but I’m slowly learning how to cope with it. I’ve found new ways to channel that energy into something positive.”
I suddenly felt a wave of anxiety hit me, realizing that the drama with Alec had been a trigger for him. I felt like shit over it.
“I’m sorry that I involved you with the Alec stuff. I didn’t realize the sort of effect it was having on you.”
He shook his head, “No, it’s ok. I was worried about you more than anything. I didn’t want you to get hurt…or lose yourself to him. I wanted to keep you safe…and the fact that you gave me a chance…trusted me with that…it meant more to me than you realize.”
I sighed, “But when you found us in the dressing room, I could see it. It did something to you beyond being upset about what he did.”
His brows furrowed, “It was just…the fact that I wanted to inflict pain on him…it scared me a little. I was worried that I was more like my dad than I realized…that a part of me was violent enough to do the things he did…because I really wanted to. Then I was also afraid that I had scared you…that you would think I was no better than Alec. I didn’t want you to think that I could treat you the same way.”
My lips set into a tight line. I was determined to make him see himself as I do.
“You’re nothing like either of those men. I know this. You’re just fiercely protective of those you care about…If anything, you’re a nurturer. You’re selfless and enjoy caring for others. You’re an amazing person and worthy of everything good that life brings to you. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t believe that.”
From the way his face scrunched up, I could tell he was fighting back his emotions. I pulled him against me, allowing him to bury his face against my neck as I hugged him. His arms tightened around me as his shoulders began to shake with his quiet sobs. His sniffles became a little more frequent as he allowed himself to feel whatever it was he was feeling.
He was right, knowing about his past did help me understand him better. His past self-destructive behavior and difficulty with relationships made so much more sense. The fact that he had shared this with me so willingly showed me that he was trying to break the cycle and connect with me in ways that he never had with anyone else. He was still putting in the work to better himself and be happy.
I continued to sooth him for a time, until he finally pulled away as he wiped his face with a tentative smile, causing his eyes to crinkle around the edges. Realizing that he was obviously feeling better, I gave him an encouraging smile in return.
“You somehow always seem to know what I need before I do. Thank you for not being afraid to show me,” he finally said.
I chuckled, “I don’t really know. I just know what I would want under the circumstances.”
He hummed as he nuzzled his nose against mine, “So…naked cuddling and slow, mind-blowing sex? Noted.”
I laughed. It was nice to see his sense of humor returning.
“Sooo…were you and Evan a thing at one point?” I asked. I couldn’t help being curious about it.
Dieter snorted, “Hell no. We were in the drama club together, but he doesn't swing that way. Never has. He likes boobs too much. He was there for the chics.”
I snickered, “Good to know. I didn’t get those vibes between you two, but I had to ask. I didn’t realize he’d been around for that long.”
He smiled, “Oh yeah, we go way back. I’m not sure I could trust anyone else to handle my stuff the way he does. He actually looks out for me and has my best interest in mind…calls me on my shit when he needs to. I’ve had other assistants that just wanted to enable my bad behavior so they could party and take advantage of me in some way. I can’t be having that anymore.”
I couldn’t help wondering about his parents after that. He seemed to notice something was on my mind and asked what I was thinking about.
“Have you had any contact with your parents since you left?” I asked.
His lips set into a tight line, “Umm well…my mom pretty much drank herself to death. She died years ago…but my dad…I think he’s still around somewhere. It’s been a while, but I’ll occasionally get a call asking for money. I don’t give him shit. That goes over about like you would expect. He hasn’t changed much. He’s still an asshole.”
I sighed, “I’m sorry.”
He shrugged, “It is what it is. I can’t change him. I can only change myself and how I respond to him.”
We soon noticed the time, realizing that we were going to be late for our evening rehearsal. After rushing around, we eventually made it to the studio. I think Dieter was happy for the distraction, quickly settling into our routine and focusing on the performance. He was back to his goofy and smiley self, having fun as we tried out a couple of different options for the choreography. At times we behaved a little less professionally as our bodies moved together with lingering touches and lips brushing against any skin they could get near without being completely obvious to anyone who might be passing by.
Things were definitely evolving between us, yet again. After the events from earlier in the day, I could tell something had changed. It was like all of the broken pieces of our being were slowly falling back into place and somehow converging into one. With every new piece that found its place, our connection steadily grew. Part of me questioned if it was real or just being overblown and intensified by the circumstances we found ourselves in. I hated to think like that, but it was something to consider.
After rehearsals, I found myself back at Dieter’s house. It was late, so we settled on something quick for dinner. Dieter made sandwiches that were fancier than anything I had ever put together between two pieces of bread. He was incapable of doing things halfway it seemed.
We got ready for bed after that, going through our newly established routine. We didn’t even bother changing into sleep clothes, now opting to sleep in nothing instead. I crawled into bed, snuggling in while Dieter shut off the lights and made sure the door was cracked for Zee. He slid under the blankets, reaching to pull me against him and tangle our limbs together. After burying his face in my hair, he sighed in contentment and squeezed me just a little tighter. He was asleep within minutes, and I wasn’t too far behind him.
When I awoke the next morning, Dieter was still snoring lightly against the back of my shoulder. I could just make out Zee’s paw stretched out across the side of his head and disappearing into his mess of curls as she snoozed behind him. I moved to get up, but Dieter groaned and stiffened his arm that was thrown over my middle.
I chuckled and whined, “Diiieter, I’ve gotta peeee.”
He huffed as he mumbled out a gravelly, “Fine.” Then he turned, snuggling Zee instead. “Guess I’ll just cuddle my other cat then.”
I laughed at his ridiculousness, shaking my head as I made my way to the bathroom. Once I was finished, I took the opportunity to swipe another one of Dieter’s t-shirts that said ‘Stay Horny for Art’ in large letters across the front. It had me shaking my head all over again as I slipped it on and walked out into the bedroom. I made my way over to his side of the bed, leaning down to ruffle his hair before giving him a quick kiss.
“I’m gonna go get breakfast started.”
He grabbed my hand, kissing the top of it before groaning and hiding his face from the sunlight that was beginning to sneak through the curtains. I smiled to myself as I pulled away and made my way downstairs. He was too adorable when he was half asleep and needy.
I was obviously nowhere as good of a cook as Dieter, so I decided to keep it simple. As I was digging through the pantry for pancake ingredients I heard movement in the kitchen. Assuming it was Dieter, I called out to ask, “Do you know where the…”
My words trailed off as I walked out of the pantry to find a petite woman, most likely in her early fifties, with short dark red hair, and a scowl on her face. I stopped in my tracks, taken off guard by her sudden appearance.
She stood with her hands on her hips as she looked me up and down, “I thought he was done bringing hussies home?”
I nearly choked on my own spit as I sucked in a breath. I shook my head, “No… I’m not…”
She sighed, “Did he relapse again? I’m gonna kick his ass if he did…then quit.”
That took me by surprise. I liked her already. Spitfire indeed.
I held my hands out in surrender, “No…he’s fine. He’s still in bed, asleep. You must be Cora, I presume?”
She seemed taken aback that I knew who she was, her face shifting from frustration to confusion before she nodded.
I gave her what I hoped was a polite smile, “I’m Kat. Dieter’s dance partner…”
I could tell when the realization hit because her eyes widened and her mouth fell open slightly before she finally spoke, “I’m not sure what to do with this...”
I chuckled, “It’s ok…I think this is a learning experience for all of us.”
Dieter chose that moment to come shuffling into the kitchen wearing nothing but a pair of grey gym shorts and black crocs with Zee at his heels on a mission for breakfast. He came to stand next to me so he could wrap his arm around my waist and give me a quick kiss on the cheek, smiling lazily as he turned toward Cora, “I see you’ve finally met my lady. I hope you weren’t too hard on her…”
Cora’s eyebrows lifted up to her hairline as she studied Dieter. If I had to guess, I could only assume he had never acted this way toward anyone in front of her before. She gave a hesitant smile, “Dieter…you wanna tell me what’s going on?”
He pulled me snugly against his chest, “Well…we’re not exactly making it public yet…but Kat and I are together.”
“Together?” she asked. As if she needed confirmation.
He nodded as he fought a laugh, “Yeah…together. Like…a couple. Dating. Courting. Whatever your generation calls it.”
She gave him an admonishing look, “My generation? I’m not that much older than you, you little shit. You’ll be fifty in no time.”
I clapped a hand over my mouth to hold in the laughter that was threatening to escape. Dieter, on the other hand, cackled over her words. I could already see why he hired her. She was his kind of people.
Cora rolled her eyes at him before changing the subject back to us. “Well, this makes sense. I knew something was going on with you…you’ve been different lately. I just thought you were slipping back into your old habits and tryin’ ta hide it. I’m happy to see that’s not the case.”
She paused, giving me a mischievous smile before looking back at Dieter. “Looks like you’ve made a good decision for once. I’m not getting floozy, gold digging vibes from this one.”
Dieter chuckled as he turned to look at me with a dimpling smile, “No. She’s definitely not a floozy or a gold digger…she’s perfect.”
He had that sappy look in his eyes as they danced around my face. His smile widened as my cheeks flushed from his gaze and the words he said so freely. I could feel my heart fluttering in my chest as the thoughts of what that feeling meant, bounced around in my head. I refused to acknowledge it by name, but I knew what it was. The fact that I was falling so hard, so fast, had my mind reeling. I had to quickly pivot my train of thought before a spiral started. My attention shifted back to Cora, who was watching us intently, with a toothy smile.
Dieter invited her to sit for breakfast as he shuffled things around on the top shelf of the pantry to find the pancake ingredients. After refusing to let me help, I joined Cora on a stool at the island to watch Dieter cook. We slipped into an easy conversation, getting to know each other a little better while also teasing Dieter in any way we could. She was quickly becoming one of my new favorite people. It made me happy to know this was who Dieter was choosing to surround himself with now, even if she was hired help.
Since we didn’t have to be in rehearsal until later in the day, we spent some time lazing about in the pool. Not a minute passed that we weren’t touching each other in some way - be it laying back against his chest as he whispered sweetly in my ear while we lounged in the shallows or wrapped in his arms as he held me tightly and spoke in a low voice against my lips between kisses in the deep water. It never felt sexual. We were content just being wrapped up in each other as we bonded through touch and conversation. It made me realize how serious he was in not making our relationship about sex.
He opened himself up to me in a way I didn’t think anyone ever had, holding nothing back and giving me every part of himself. There was a lightness to him now, like everything that once weighed him down had been discarded and left in the past. It made me hopeful for him, and for us. His smile and happiness were infectious and warm. He was the sun and my light, teaching me how to find my confidence and love myself again. However, in the back of my mind I still had a worry that I was allowing him to affect me too much, too soon. I knew he had the power to break me in a way that Alec couldn’t, but he had given me more than enough reasons to trust that he wouldn’t.
After spending a good amount of time in the pool, we decided to relax and read on a chaise lounger. Dieter sat down, then allowed me to sit between his thighs and recline against his chest as I read aloud from the pages of Dan Brown’s The Lost Symbol. This eventually shifted into a debate about US government conspiracy theories which had us in fits of giggles as we argued our points for and against each one. We were into a deep conversation about the Roswell crash when my phone rang on the table next to us with an incoming FaceTime call. Dieter reached for it and handed it to me.
Seeing my sister’s name flash on the screen elicited a sigh from me. “I probably better answer this. She’s been giving me hell because I haven’t called her in a few weeks.”
Dieter shifted to get up and give me some privacy, but I stopped him, “No. Stay. I might as well tell her what I’ve been up to in my free time…”
He gave me a nervous look as he settled back into the seat. I took a deep breath then hit the ‘answer’ button, careful to keep the camera focused on my face for now as I smiled into it.
“Lydia, hey…how are you?”
She looked annoyed, “About damn time you answered. Why haven’t you called me?”
I smiled nervously, “Oh you know…I’ve been busy with rehearsals…”
She scoffed, “You’re never this busy with rehearsals…”
I scoffed back, “Well, I typically don’t make it this far into the competition to keep me this busy with rehearsals…”
She paused for a beat, considering my response. “Fair point. I guess I’ll let it slide…How come you’re not rehearsing now?”
I pushed a stray piece of hair away that was blowing in my face, “Our schedule got moved around a bit. We have an evening rehearsal today.”
She nodded, “Well…what’s been going on? I haven’t talked to you in weeks. Has Alec been an issue?”
I grimaced and shrugged, “You know…it’s Alec. I’m just avoiding him as much as I can and trying to move on…”
Something in my demeanor must have tipped her off, causing her eyes to narrow slightly. “And how is the moving on going? I feel like you’ve been very…nonchalant about this whole thing…”
I pursed my lips, “I mean…I was kind of over his shit before the thing with Lana happened. So, it’s like a weight has been lifted, honestly.”
Her eyes narrowed further, “Where are you right now?”
I could tell Dieter was holding in laughter, causing me to fight a smile as I replied. “I’m hanging out by the pool at a friend’s house.”
Dieter was shaking now, burying his face in the back of my hair to muffle his giggles. My teeth sunk into my bottom lip in an attempt to hide my smile as I angled the phone just right to cut him out of frame.
Lydia’s eyebrow arched. She was not amused with my evasive answers. “How are things going with your dance partner? You’ve hardly said anything about him…”
I couldn’t help smirking at that question, “It’s going good…he’s a good dancer…and we get along.”
Her face told me she was on to my bullshit while her voice feigned ignorance. “Hm, well that’s good. I guess that’s why you have such good chemistry on the dance floor then…”
I chuckled, “Well, he is an Oscar winning actor. He knows how to play a role well…”
I could tell Dieter was about to lose what little composure he had over that line. I wasn’t too far behind him.
Lydia sighed, “Kat…just tell me what the hell is going on. I’m not an idiot…something is up with you. Did something happen with him?”
I scrunched up my nose, “You really wanna know?”
She sighed, “Kat, seriously?” She paused and rubbed at the crease between her brows as she continued, “So there is something to that TMZ article then? Please tell me he at least fucked some sense into you and made ya realize that Alec was a shitty lay?”
Dieter snorted out a laugh before clapping his hand over his mouth. I grimaced while trying to hold in my own laughter. Lydia’s brows furrowed in confusion.
I glanced up at Dieter with a questioning look. After getting a nod of approval from him, I stretched my arms out in front of us so that we both fit into the frame. Dieter smiled sheepishly and waved. Lydia gasped out a shocked, “Oh shit!” before accidentally dropping her phone.
Dieter and I burst into laughter as the blurred images on the screen bounced around before finally focusing back on her shocked face. She sat there staring with her mouth hanging open as she processed what she was seeing.
Dieter chuckled before finally speaking, “Hi, Lydia! I’m sorry I’ve been keeping your sister from you. I swear it’s not on purpose.”
Her mouth finally snapped shut, “Wow, OK. So, this is like…happening then?”
I nodded with a smile, “Yeah, it kind of is…”
She looked overwhelmed now as she sputtered out, “How?...When?…Does Alec know?…” She paused, then gasped out, “Did you cheat on Alec? Please say yes.”
Dieter buried his face in my neck as he laughed at her. I shook my head and chuckled, “No. No cheating. It was after I ended things with Alec…in New York. Dieter’s been really supportive with everything and was looking out for me. We had gotten close and…it just sort of…happened.”
I reached up behind me to cup his cheek. He wasted no time lacing his fingers through mine as he turned his head to kiss the palm of my hand and pulled it away to nuzzle his cheek against the side of my head.
Lydia looked absolutely dumbfounded as she mumbled out, “Holy shit. So, you’re like together, together? This isn’t a fling type thing?”
I scoffed, “No, you know I’m not into that.”
She laughed, “I KNEW something was going on with him! I could tell from the way you look at him when you’re dancing on the show.”
Dieter and I snickered before I continued, “Well, we’re not going public yet. The producers are trying hard to make this a thing and I refuse to let them. Alec suspects, but I don’t wanna give him any more ammunition to come at us. I just wanna make it through this season with as little drama as possible and be done with it all.”
She nodded before her expression shifted to one of worry. “So, how has it been going…with you two?”
The question seemed innocent enough, but her tone told another story. Dieter sighed quietly, then leaned in next to my ear, “I’m gonna go get us something to drink and give you two some time to chat.”
I felt my stomach drop and hoped that hadn’t upset him as I shifted so that he could get up. He gave me a quick kiss on the top of the head before he disappeared inside.
My eyes shifted back to the phone, “Did you really have to ask that right now?”
She huffed out a nervous laugh, “What do you mean?”
It was my turn to narrow my eyes, “You know what I mean…you and your disapproving tone.”
She sighed, “It’s not disapproval…it’s concern. You just got out of a very long term engagement with an asshole and immediately got with Dieter Bravo of all people? He has a reputation ya know. I just worry is all.”
I couldn’t argue with her logic. Those same thoughts had already crossed my mind on more than one occasion.
My brows furrowed, “I completely understand where you’re coming from…I’ve thought about that too. It is fast, but we were building a solid friendship beforehand. It’s not like I just met him last week. And Dieter…he’s not what you would expect…certainly not what I expected. He’s actually very caring and sweet. He’s been working really hard on himself…and he really is a good person. We’ve connected in a way that I’ve never connected with anyone before…”
She puffed air through her cheeks as she rubbed at her temple, “Oh Kat…you’ve got it bad, don’t you?”
I sighed, “Yeah, I think I do…I mean, the man is learning to make Greek food for me…and he’s always worried about how I’m feeling after rehearsals. He makes a point to take care of me…cooking, hot baths, massages…Alec always acted like my body aches were such a damn burden. And Dieter…he’s so open about everything…his past, his feelings. He’s the complete opposite of Alec in every way. How could I not have it bad with that?”
Lydia let out a low whistle, “Damn, sis…he almost sounds too good to be true. What about his reputation though? The whoring around and partying? Doesn’t that worry you?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. It was frustrating, but I understood where she was coming from.
“He’s been sober for ten months and hasn’t been with anyone else for even longer than that. He’s been taking it seriously…We’ve talked through why he used to do those things and he’s working through it…I-I trust him. He’s not that person any more. He’s already proved that to me in a million different ways.”
She grimaced slightly, “Are you sure this isn’t another one of your ‘I can fix him’ phases?”
I scoffed, “I should be offended by that…but I kind of deserved it. I-It’s not that. Dieter doesn’t need me to fix him. He was already fixing himself before he met me. He did that part on his own.”
That seemed to alleviate some of her worries, causing her features to relax. “Well, that’s good to hear at least.”
I huffed out a laugh, “Hell, if anything he’s fixing me...”
Lydia snickered, “So he’s good in bed then…”
I couldn’t help rolling my eyes as I fought a smile, “That’s not what I was referring to, but yes…he is. He’s very attentive, skilled…adventurous…and he knows how to read me. No direction needed. It’s…more than just sex with him too…it’s always very intimate…during and after.”
I paused, briefly laughing to myself as I thought about mine and Dieter’s previous conversation we had in this very spot. “When we got back from New York, he invited me over to stay with him…he didn’t wanna have sex that night. He said he didn’t want it to be all about that with us. We didn’t do it again for like a week. He’s all about exploring all forms of intimacy.”
Lydia’s eyes nearly bulged out her head with that news. “Fuuuck, ok. He just won me over because that’s a major turn on.”
I laughed, “Right? You understand now? And I haven’t even told you about his cat and plants.”
Lydia looked intrigued, however, Dieter chose that moment to emerge from the house carrying two glasses of lemonade.
I murmured out a quick “I’ll fill you in on that later,” as I turned to smile up at him. I scooted forward so he could take his seat behind me after he set the glasses on the small table beside us. He wasted no time wrapping his arms around my waist and hugging me tightly against his chest.
“Alright ladies, what did I miss?” he asked in a playful tone.
Lydia bit back a laugh, “Kat was just telling me that you’re awesome in the sack.”
I could feel my cheeks flush, “Fucking hell, Lyd. Shut up.”
Dieter vibrated from laughter behind me, shaking his head as he spoke. “Well, I guess there are worse things she could be saying.”
We fell into easy conversation after that, somehow dragging Lydia into our prior discussion about conspiracy theories. They were both laughing and already throwing jokes at one another. I could tell she liked him which gave me some comfort. After we hung up, a text message immediately pinged from Lydia.
Lydia: OK. I get it now. Hot. Fucking hilarious. Worships you. I approve. 👏👏👏
I smiled and showed it to Dieter, who howled with laughter. He was feeling pretty smug, having won the affections of my sister.
Soon after that, relaxation time was up. We had to get to the studio for a rather exhausting rehearsal. Given that the Paso Doble is a fast paced, Latin style dance, it didn’t take long before we were running on fumes, but the choreography was really beginning to come together by this point in the week. Dieter was having fun with the fact that most of the attention for this dance was on him and allowed him to show a little bit of sass and attitude. He was definitely playing up those attributes, and I was enjoying every second of it. Especially after he declared the room felt like an inferno and peeled his sweaty shirt off over his head.
(Click images to enlarge so you don't miss anything. More after the jump.)
The constant rehearsals were definitely having an effect on his body, toning all the right muscles and slimming him down slightly. He looked amazing and I could tell he was feeling it too. He seemed more confident in himself, which only led to more torture for me. It was obvious he was intentionally flaunting the goods to get me worked up - not that I was complaining. I didn’t mind seeing more skin or watching the muscles in his chest, arms, and back flex as he moved around the dance floor. It was quickly becoming one of my favorite sights. Especially when he added that sexy smirk of his to the mix.
After rehearsal, Dieter went to pick up takeout for us while I ran home to check on things and resupply on clothes and the essentials before I made my way over to his house. He was just setting Zee’s dinner down on her mat when I walked in. They seemed to be having some sort of standoff over the evening’s meal selection as he placed his hands on his hips and huffed down at her. She sat defiantly staring up at him as her tail flicked back and forth. I rolled my lips together to hold in my laugh as I watched Zee meow loudly, which elicited a heavy sigh from Dieter.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. There’s nothing wrong with it, woman. You don’t have to have freshly cooked protein with every meal.”
She meowed again, then glanced at her plate before shifting her eyes back to his. He rolled his eyes and puffed air out of his cheeks before stalking over to the pantry, then emerged with a pouch of tuna. Clearly losing the battle with his furry little menace. Zee seemed more enthusiastic about her dinner as she watched him spoon a small amount out on top of her food. Finally, a compromise.
Dieter turned his attention to me with an exasperated look on his face. “I think I have unintentionally created a monster,” he said through a chuckle.
I walked over toward the island to unpack our dinner as I snickered, “It seems so…but I gotta say, watching you two battle it out has become one of my favorite pastimes. She’s got you wrapped around her little paw.”
He came to stand behind me, grazing his nose up the side of my neck as he wrapped his arms around me. “What can I say? I live to serve my two ladies. I’m your bitch and I have no shame to say it.”
I snorted out a laugh as I sank back against him, turning to give him a quick kiss. He pulled away with a smile, “Speaking of…I got you some spanakopita…and after you eat, we’re taking a hot bath. If my body hurts this bad, I know yours has to.”
I smiled up at him, “Sounds like a plan. I am feeling quite achy this evening.”
His lips set into a tight line, “I’ll make you some herbal tea. It’ll help. Now…go sit. Get off your feet. I’ll handle all this.”
The no nonsense look on his face told me there was no arguing. So, I did as he said. He had a plate full of food and a glass of water in front of me within minutes, making sure I was taken care of before he sat down beside me. When we finished, he put everything away while I spent a few minutes cuddling Zee and drinking my fresh cup of herbal tea. He soon disappeared upstairs to run the bath, and I followed several minutes later.
I found Dieter undressed down to his boxer briefs and leaning over the side of the tub, checking the water temperature and adding some Epsom salt. The sight of him caused my pulse to quicken. When he turned and gave me his sexy little smirk, I thought my heart would explode out of my chest. Without a word, he stood to grab a brush and began to meticulously brush the knots out of my hair caused by today’s rehearsal. Then he twisted it up and secured it with a flat clip. He proceeded to undress me, taking his time to allow his hands and lips to gently explore my body before helping me into the tub.
Dieter settled in on the opposite end, immediately taking one of my feet into his large hands and began massaging. I relaxed into the water, enjoying the feel of the jets spraying along my body and Dieter’s touch. We sat staring at each other in silence, the air around us electric as we simply existed together. His lips tugged upward as his fingers dipped down to rub at that spot on my foot, causing my thighs to clench. My teeth sunk into my bottom lip as I narrowed my eyes in his direction.
The smirk was back now, “What’s the matter Kitten? You need something from me?”
I further relaxed into the water, “I think you’re the one being naughty right now, Bravo.”
His brows arched, “Let me show you how naughty I can be. Just lay back and relax. Don’t fight the sensations. Imma show you how nerve endings work.”
I did as he asked, trying to loosen up and just feel as our eyes remained locked in an intense stare. His thumbs got to work, gradually increasing pressure in the spots he knew would get me worked up. I could feel the tingle begin in my foot, eventually shooting up directly to my core. My first instinct was to pull away just because it was an odd sensation. It caused his grip to tighten as he tsked at me, “Relax, Kitten. Don’t fight it. Feel it.”
He continued the same pressure with his thumb, allowing me a moment to become accustomed to the sensation. I was soon panting under his touch, my thighs tensing as my center sought out more friction. It was as if I was suspended right on the edge, close enough to feel something but never completely falling over. His hooded gaze told me that he was enjoying watching me writhe under his touch at the other end of the tub. I lost track of how long that went on. I was damn near in tears when he gave me that mischievous smirk and finally spoke, “Touch yourself for me…”
My jaw fell slack as one hand moved down to my massage breast and the other to my center. My fingers got to work rubbing at the sensitive and swollen nub, adding to the sensations I was already feeling from where Dieter continued to rub my foot, now adding even more pressure with his thumbs. Within seconds, I fell over the edge. My body tensing and arching out of the water as a loud moan escaped my lips. I saw stars as the blood rushed behind my ears. It was one of the most intense orgasms I had ever had from basic stimulation. Dieter continued rubbing my foot through it, prolonging the sensations until I finally relaxed into the water.
When my senses finally returned, my eyes fluttered open to find Dieter’s smug smile. He seemed rather proud of himself. I gave him a lazy smile in return, suggestively running my foot down his chest until it disappeared under the water - going lower to brush against his hardness that was hiding under the surface. His eyes narrowed, “Now who's being naughty?”
I gave him an innocent smile, “Oh no…I’m just returning the favor.”
I sat up, shifting to join him at the other end of the tub. With my breast pressed against him, I leaned in for a slow and sensual kiss. My left arm moved around his neck allowing my fingers to tangle in his hair as my lips trailed down his jaw to first suck on his ear lobe before moving to the sensitive spot behind it. I resituated myself, my left side leaning against him as my right hand traced a path downward. His lips captured mine until my fingers wrapped around the base of his cock and stroked upward. His jaw fell slack, breaking our kiss as his head dropped backward onto the ledge of the tub. With the arm that was wrapped around me, he reached up to gently rub soothing circles at the base of my neck as I continued to pump his length - occasionally swiping my thumb over the head and squeezing just a little tighter.
I took this opportunity to take in his expressions as his breath quickened. His head lolled back and forth as his brows pinched together. His teeth bit into his bottom lip as he turned and whimpered quietly against my shoulder. I leaned down, grazing my nose against his ear, speaking in a silky soft voice.
“You’ve been so good today…taking care of me in every way. I think it’s only fair that I take care of you too. Don’t you?”
He whimpered, his mouth falling open, allowing his hot pants to blow against the curve of my neck as my hand pumped a little faster. My fingers twisted in his hair, pulling it slightly causing his head to fall back away from me so that I could see his face again. His brows pinched together tighter as his arm tensed around me, his fingers now gripping my shoulder firmly. He was panting out soft whimpers with every exhale, eventually turning into a deep groan as I swiped my thumb over the head for the last time - causing him to cum. He trembled under me, eventually going limp against the tub, sucking in deep breaths through his pouty lips as his brows arched.
A curl fell down over his forehead as his head leaned toward me. He looked relaxed now and completely blissed out as he sat there with his eyes closed. A lazy grin slid across his lips as his dark eyes finally blinked open to meet my gaze. Without warning he pulled me down, causing me to squeal as he crashed his lips against mine. His hands ghosted up and down my back side while we continued to make out like a couple of teenagers, pulling apart only to stare into each other's eyes.
He reached up to brush a stray hair away from my face as he took me in, “You know…I wouldn’t be upset if every night for the rest of my life ended like this…with us together…you make me happier than I ever thought possible.”
His words took me off guard, causing a mix of emotions - excitement because it meant he was thinking long term about our future, but also panic. It was another reminder of how hard and how fast I was falling for him because I now realized I wanted that, more than anything. I was also setting myself up to get hurt badly if this went wrong. I was already in so much deeper with him than I ever was with Alec. I need to get over this. Dieter isn’t Alec. He won’t do what Alec did.
My eyes searched his, I could tell he meant what he was saying. I felt like he wanted to say more but was holding back. I suddenly felt emotional, the only response I could muster was a small smile before pulling him in for a gentle kiss. I turned, settling back against his chest as his hands rubbed my shoulders.
He kissed the top of my head, seeming to sense my anxiety, then leaned his cheek against it as he spoke, “I’m sorry, I probably shouldn’t have said that…I wanna take things at a pace you're OK with. I don’t want you to feel rushed. I mean it when I say you’re important to me and…I don’t wanna fuck this up.”
I grabbed his hand and nuzzled it against the side of my face, “Don’t apologize. I want you to be open with me about your feelings. I do appreciate the grace…just be patient with me. I’m there with you, but I’m feeling a lot of things…I’m still working through a lot of things, most of which have nothing to do with you…just know that.”
He hugged me against him, brushing the hair back off my face as he told me to relax for a little while. We sat in silence for a time, until Zee came strutting into the bathroom meowing because we weren’t in bed yet. We took that as our cue to start our bedtime routine so as not to upset the queen of the Bravo residence.
Dieter climbed into bed first that night, raising the blanket for me to crawl in beside him. I was suddenly feeling vulnerable as I snuggled in against his chest. He pulled me snugly against himself as I tangled my leg with his. His scent and warmth surrounded me, calming me and bringing me back to my senses. “Dieter?”
He murmured out a sleepy ‘hm?’ against the top of my hair.
“I wouldn’t mind having this every night, too.”
I felt him smile as he nuzzled his face further into my hair and hugged me just a little tighter.
Dieter’s POV
This week had been such an emotional roller coaster for me already. Kat and I finally caved after a week of no sex, first in the dressing room at the studio, then again after we got back to my place that same evening. It wasn’t just sex though. Like in New York, it was different - intense. She had me feeling things that I had never felt before, causing my emotions to jump all over the place. It felt like it was never enough and too much all at the same time. I wondered if this was what it felt like to make love to someone. I had always heard people say that, but never really understood it. To me, there was only sex or fucking. Those two things didn’t feel like appropriate descriptors for what Kat and I did though.
There was no question about my feelings for her. I knew I was in love, but did the intensity between us mean she felt the same about me? I couldn’t help hoping that was the case. Why else would it feel like this with her if she wasn’t reciprocating those feelings? It was something I wanted to bring up with her, but I didn’t know how. I didn’t want to freak her out and ruin what we were building. Deep down I knew she was more fragile than she let on. I knew this thing with Alec had affected her no matter how hard she tried to hide it. I wanted to make sure I gave her all the time she needed to heal.
The shit storm brewing around us certainly didn’t help any. I knew there would eventually be some repercussions from the Alec confrontation. The rumors had already begun to swirl and TMZ had gotten a whiff of it. They were sniffing around for any details they could get so they could post about it.
Then that suggestive text message came through when Kat had my phone. I damn near had a panic attack, worried she would think I was talking to other people behind her back. I knew I should have gotten my number changed as soon as all those random messages started to come in after SNL. It would have saved us both some grief. Thankfully, it appeared as if she believed my explanation. At least I hoped she did, because it was the truth. However, I knew it had to be worrisome to her after the whole Alec thing. I felt like a complete asshole over the incident. I never wanted to do anything to make her worry about those sort of things because I would never do that to her.
I went from that major fuck up right into my therapy session with Dr. Smith where she made me talk about my parents and how that related to my freak out on Alec. It was something that I did need to talk through. I couldn’t put it off forever because it had been bothering me. Dr. Smith helped me realize that the visceral reaction was more about protecting someone I care deeply for than anything - that I’m not that violent person. My biggest fear is that I would turn into my father or that I was already like him in some way. Deep down I knew I wasn’t, but that worry would always be there because I was so affected by it during my early life.
When I got back home after that session, I went straight to my sanctuary. I needed to get it out of my system in some way, finally settling for music. When I began to play, I didn’t have any intention to go live on Instagram, but I figured why not? That was what Lenny wanted me to do. I ended up finding it to be strangely cathartic, but I was still feeling down when Kat showed up. Given that Dr. Smith had encouraged me to tell Kat about my past, I felt like it was the last step I needed to take to absolve myself of all the things I was feeling.
I didn’t even know where to start, but Kat knew exactly what I needed - pulling me into that moment of intimacy and just letting me be while I worked through my emotions. I needed all of her and she willingly let me have as much as I could handle. It felt like something shifted between us yet again, but I didn’t know what. All I knew is that I felt closer to her afterward and completely safe to open up to tell her about my past.
Our relationship really was progressing quicker than I thought it would. After Kat met Cora, she had essentially met all the important people in my circle. She was becoming engrained in every part of my life, and I couldn’t have been happier about it. Cora loved Kat and approved once she got to spend a little time with her. Kat had even told her sister about me, which I felt like was a big fucking deal. She seemed almost proud to show me off to Lydia, not hesitating to let me join their call after she spilled the beans. It all felt very natural, and I honestly couldn’t believe it was happening. This thing between us was obviously turning into something serious. It was scary, but I welcomed it with open arms. I was ready to have someone, to have my own functional family.
After allowing my mind to run a marathon of thoughts as I laid in bed staring at the ceiling, my attention turned to Kat. She was sleeping soundly beside me. I hated to disturb her, but I really needed to take a piss and get breakfast started. Since it was a late rehearsal day, I wanted to take advantage of our free time and surprise her with an authentic Greek meal.
Kat groaned as I pulled away from her to get up, causing me to huff out a quiet laugh as I ran my fingertips down the side of her cheek. “Sorry to wake you sweetheart, go back to sleep for a bit. I’m gonna go make you some breakfast.”
She hummed out in agreement, snuggling deeper into the blankets as I tucked them around her. Zee stood from her spot at the end of the bed, moving toward Kat’s head. I narrowed my eyes at her, pointing an accusing finger as I whispered out, “You behave. Don’t be an annoying little shit.”
Kat snickered into the pillow as she lifted the blanket, allowing Zee to cuddle in against her before cocooning them both in the duvet. Seeing my two girls snuggled up in my bed together was really doing something to me, causing my heart to flutter in my chest and making me feel happy in a way I never had been. I really couldn’t ask for anything better than that.
I threw on a pair of gym shorts and grabbed my fluffy green robe, then headed downstairs to start cooking. I had asked Cora to pick up some ingredients for a traditional Greek breakfast that I wanted to try my hand at making. It seemed simple enough, so I figured I couldn’t fuck it up too badly.
I got to work, chopping the tomatoes and onions before letting them sauté in a pan - eventually adding lightly beaten eggs and several spices before topping with crumbled feta. I followed that up with fried pork, then made a small batch of what equated to Greek French toast. Kat came shuffling in just as I added the finishing touches of honey and cinnamon to the fried bread. I could hear her sniffing the air as she came up behind me to wrap her arms around my waist.
“This smells amazing. What did you make?”
After setting the container of cinnamon down, I turned to face her with a smirk, wrapping my arms around her and hugging her against me as I went over the morning menu.
“Well, we have some fried pork…and forgive me if I butcher the names…but I also made some fetoydia and strapatsada.”
Her eyes lit up, “No you didn’t?!?!”
I chuckled, “I did. I also had Cora get you some fancy imported Greek coffee and mountain tea too. I’m curious to try those. Which would you like with your breakfast?”
Her mouth hung open for a beat, clearly surprised by my efforts. “I can’t believe you did that for me…I don’t even know what to say.”
I shrugged, “It’s not a big deal. You know I love to try new things…and you’ve given me a reason to. Now, coffee or tea?”
She sighed in contentment, “Coffee, please.”
I gave her a quick kiss on the forehead before pulling away to get it started, “Coming right up! Food’s done, so dig in.”
She had a ghost of a smile on her lips as she made her plate which had me feeling all warm and fuzzy. I would never tire of spoiling her every chance I got.
Kat seemed to enjoy the meal, moaning in appreciation with every bite. She and I ate way too much to the point we both felt miserable after. Thankfully we had several hours before we had to be in the dance studio, so we could relax and be a little lazy for a while. We spent some time snuggled on the couch - her tucked into my side as Zee stretched out in the crevice between Kat and the back of the sofa. Kat watched as I aimlessly scrolled through the threads of one of my online plant groups, taking the time to respond to questions and complain to her about how so many people gave terrible advice.
I chuckled as I explained to Kat how I was the dickhead that always incited arguments about plant care and then won them and how I had amassed quite the little following that always directly asked me for advice. I often wondered what they would do if they knew who they were actually talking to.
After several minutes, Kat piped up to ask, “What do they mean when they say SuccDee? Is that a dirty plant joke? I don’t understand the context.”
My body shook with laughter as I tried to hold it in. I finally got it together enough to answer her. “My username is ‘Succulent_Daddy_Dee’. They have taken to calling me ‘SuccDee’ for short.”
I could see the moment of realization on her face as her eyes widened. Then she burst into laughter as she buried her face in my chest. She had tears in her eyes as she asked, “And I’m sure you did nothing to encourage that. You’re so bad…”
I snorted out laughter, “Hey, I wasn’t the one to come up with it. However, I will admit I did nothing to discourage it. Honestly, I spent a good five minutes laughing the first time someone said it. It just stuck and it’s kind of fucking perfect.”
She wiped her eyes, “I’m not sure which version of that name is more entertaining. The multiple meanings of the word succulent take it to a whole other level.”
I feigned innocence, “I have no idea what you’re talking about. A succulent is a type of plant. I am the father to many succulent plants. Get your mind outta the gutter.”
She broke into another fit of giggles, “You’re so full of shit.”
I snickered, “Yeah, guilty…but hey, at least I keep it entertaining.”
With the arm she had thrown across my torso, she gave me a little squeeze. “That you do. I can’t complain.”
I continued to scroll, pausing on a post that caught my attention and reading it out loud to Kat.
Here’s a little fun fact for all of my plant enthusiasts. Plants can talk! They emit ultrasonic vibrations of 20–100 kHz. To make this more interesting, cats can hear up to 64 kHz and dogs up to 45 kHz. Does this mean my pets can hear the plants?
I looked down at her, “Fuuck, am I unknowingly driving Zee insane with all my plants? It must be super loud in here to her...”
This fact was sort of blowing my mind as I peeked over at Zee, the mention of her name rousing her from a deep sleep. “Damn Zee, I wish you could talk. I wanna know what they say…Maybe I should talk to them more?”
My attention diverted back to Kat, finding her smiling up at me. “Well, now I know why she sometimes randomly stares at them in that freaky way she does. I wonder if there’s a way we can hear them? Imma have to research this…”
Kat’s smile widened, and to Zee’s dismay, she shifted so that she could raise up to kiss me and mumble, “You’re so fucking adorable” against my lips. My thoughts for the talking plants were soon forgotten as I discarded my iPad on the floor next to the couch and proceeded to have a heated make out session with my lady.
We were interrupted minutes later by her phone ringing on the table next to us. Kat seemed intent on ignoring it, continuing to kiss down my jaw and neck as I turned to grab her cell with a chuckle.
“It’s Marc. You need to take it?”
Her head popped up with a perplexed look on her face, “Yeah…maybe. He rarely calls me.”
She answered, going through the usual small talk and pleasantries before going quiet to listen to what I assumed was his reason for calling. Her brows pinched together slightly before she gave me a puzzled smile.
“Marc wants to know if we’re available for dinner with him, his wife, and Stefanie and her partner on Sunday?”
I was surprised by the request, but they had seemed to be more friendly toward us since the Alec incident. I figured it might do us some good to be sociable, so I shrugged. “Why not? Could be fun.”
Kat gave me a brilliant smile before telling Marc we would be there, then listened for a bit longer before asking, “Bring our guitars?”
Her eyes shifted to mine nervously. I reached up to run my fingers through her hair, causing her to relax into my touch. “Yeah…I’ll tell him to. Yep, see you then.”
After she hung up, her eyes met mine, “It seems they wanna have a jam session after dinner. They all play apparently…”
She didn’t seem excited about that idea. “We don’t have to stay for that if you don’t want to.”
Her nose scrunched up as she asked, “How do you feel about doing that?”
I shrugged, “I mean, it could be fun. I haven’t done anything like that in forever…but if you don’t want to…”
Kat sighed, “No…you know what? I’m gonna do it. I need to play again. It’ll be good for me. Besides, you’ll be there with me, so I’ll be fine.”
Her words caused a warmth to spread through me. I loved that she felt that way, that I could ease her anxieties. She was putting so much trust in me, more than anyone ever had. If only she understood how much that meant. I knew it couldn’t be easy after what she had gone through, which made it mean so much more. I gave her a soft smile before pulling her in for a tender kiss.
Zee chose that moment to paw a glass that was still about one fourth of the way full of water off the coffee table, which broke our spell and the glass.
“Zee, what the fuck?” I huffed out in frustration while Kat snorted out a laugh beside me. Zee gave me a defiant look as her tail whipped back and forth. I sighed as we moved to get up. Kat grabbed Zee to keep her safe while I moved to clean up the mess. Zee now seemed happy as a clam as she purred and snuggled against Kat.
I gave Zee the side eye as I swept up the mess, “There are other less destructive ways to get our attention, young lady. That was not cool.”
Zee seemed like she could care less as Kat scratched behind her ears and snickered at her complete disregard for my scolding. Once I got everything cleaned up, I decided to do some much needed plant care as Kat gave Zee the attention she was demanding. Zee’s need for affection didn’t last long. Once she had her fill, she simply jumped from Kats arms and made her way over to the top of her cat tree to groom herself. Kat scoffed at her dismissal as she stood, coming to stand next to me as I dusted, pruned, and misted leaves. Her arms snaked around my waist as she rested her chin on my shoulder and watched me work in silence for a few minutes. I could feel her lips brush against my skin as she asked, “Can you teach me how to do this?”
I don’t know why, but her request had my heart racing. It made me feel giddy that she wanted to learn about my hobby. I glanced down at her with a smirk, “You mean you don’t already do this for your plants?”
She snorted, “My plants are lucky to get water. They come to my house to survive, not live.”
I shook my head and scoffed out a laugh, “That’s just depressing. Don’t tell me that. Imma have to start checking in on them.”
She smiled against my neck, “I would be ok with that.”
I pulled her around to stand in front of me, now leaning over her shoulder with my arms around her. My hands shifted through the leaves of the plant I was currently working on as I explained when to prune and the process for dusting and misting. She was full of questions as she took over to do it herself. I hugged her backside against me as I supervised, placing the occasional gentle kiss against her jaw and the curve of her neck. Once she got the hang of it, we both worked through all the plants in the room as we chatted and got to know each other better. I honestly couldn’t think of a better way to spend my free time, and I found it to be a wonderful and relaxing way to bond with her.
Before we knew it, it was time for us to head off to rehearsal for the rest of the day. It was another grueling day in the dance studio and also filming day. After seven weeks of this, I could tell it was slowly wearing me down. This dance in particular was taking a lot out of me with it being very high energy. After six hours of it, my tank was running empty and I was beginning to make ridiculous mistakes with my footwork and frame. Kat seemed to be struggling as well. We were both slowing down and couldn’t seem to keep up with the music. At least it made for some interesting footage for the show. We eventually sat on the floor and settled for talking through some parts of it, deciding what still needed to be tweaked or changed and coming up with a game plan for the next two days. That part would probably be less exciting to watch, but we sort of didn’t care.
Once our studio time was up, we headed home. After a quick dinner, we showered together - too tired to do anything aside from getting clean. It wasn’t long before we crashed, falling asleep almost as soon as our heads hit the pillow. When I awoke the next morning to find Zee snuggled up next to me, I couldn’t recall having felt her get in the bed. Neither did Kat. We had obviously been out of it.
We spent our Saturday morning outdoors with the intent to take it easy until our evening rehearsal time. We started with painting some planter pots on the back patio. I had somehow managed to con Kat into the activity over breakfast. She grumbled at first, citing her lack of artistic capabilities, but that grumbling soon abated when I sat down behind her. I made sure to pull her back to my front as snugly as possible before putting my arms around her waist and using my hands to guide hers, showing her different techniques for painting flowers and trees onto the plain terracotta. After she got the hang of it, I took advantage of my position to lavish her exposed neck with attention from my mouth.
Once I had her properly worked up, I scooted away with a smirk so that I could paint my own pot. She scoffed, calling me a “fucking tease” as I shot a wink in her direction. My smugness soon faded when she began removing layers of clothing to reveal a lavender bikini that looked absolutely amazing against her golden skin. She was the smug one now as she pretended not to notice my eyes on her.
I huffed out a laugh as I pulled my t-shirt off over my head, “Fine. Two can play that game, honey.”
She scrunched up her nose in annoyance, then flicked a paintbrush in my direction - causing speckles of paint to splatter all over my face and chest. It only escalated from there. Before it was over with, we were rolling around on top of the drop cloth covered in paint, laughing like a couple of idiots in between making out with each other.
Once we realized our skin was beginning to stick together from the drying paint, we finally got up and made use of the outdoor shower stall to rinse each other off. Afterward, I jumped into the pool while she sat on the side with her legs swishing in the water, laughing at my antics and taking pictures of me with my phone.
I eventually swam up to her, wrapping my arms around her legs and resting my head on her lap as she scratched at my dripping scalp. We sat like that for a time in silence, enjoying the sun and just being together. I could get used to this. It was almost addicting having her here by my side in this way, but it was also calming the storm that always swirled in my mind. The self-depreciating and negative thoughts were so far removed from my focus that I felt what I could only describe as normal? Unburdened? Content? I couldn’t really find a word to describe it. I was definitely happy, but there was something more with it. I knew it was because of her, keeping my demons locked away in the shadows where they belonged.
I raised my head, squinting from the sun as I looked up at her with a smile. “Let's go out to the beach. I haven’t gotten to properly take advantage of it yet.”
Her brows furrowed, “Is that a good idea?”
I shrugged, “It’s a private beach…”
She scrunched up her face, “I don’t like getting in the ocean though…I’m not confident in my swimming capabilities.”
I pouted, “You don’t have to go in very far. Besides, I’m not gonna let anything happen to you. How about I just don’t let go of you?”
She sighed, tilting her head to the side as she slowly gave in to the idea. I gave her a cheesy smile, “I’ll even let you bury me in the sand. You can give me a mermaid tail and boobs.”
She snorted out a laugh, “Fine…fine. I will not be cleaning the sand out of your ass though. That’s on you.”
I backed away from her with a laugh and pulled myself up on the edge of the pool to get out, “Deal…Just remember you didn’t say anything about cleaning under my balls though.”
She cackled as I held out my hands to pull her up from the ground, “Come on, let’s go pack a bag with the essentials. I may even have a tiny shovel and a bucket you can use.”
That pulled another tinkling laugh out of her as she stood.
I was true to my word, letting Kat bury me to do all manner of ridiculous things - including the mermaid tail and boobs. I helped with the boobs, shaping and cupping them to make sure they were the perfect roundness and size, which had us both in a fit of giggles.
Afterwards, Kat stretched out on a towel under the oversized beach umbrella to read while I went for a dip in the ocean to try and wash the sand out of all the places it shouldn’t be. She laid on her stomach for a time, which had her voluptuous ass on display. I couldn’t help staring at it in those little bikini bottoms she had on. It was definitely begging to be spanked. After several minutes, she flipped over onto her back, propping herself up on her elbows as she not so subtly adjusted her top. She gave me a smirk and a wink while her boobs bounced around from where she tugged at the scraps of fabric. She knew exactly what she was doing, and it was working. I was already half hard from the visual. The dirty thoughts that followed finished the job and got me the rest of the way there.
I ambled to the shore, noticing Kat’s gaze on me as I made my way toward her. She tucked her bottom lip between her teeth as she watched me hungrily. My eyes surveyed the area, not seeing anyone near us and realizing the umbrella blocked the view from nearby houses. I intended to take full advantage of that as I sank to my knees at her feet. I crawled up her body, dripping water and peppering kisses along her heated skin as I went. I paused half way and shook my head like a dog, which elicited a loud squeal from her and laughter from the both of us before I captured her lips with mine. Her hips bucked against my raging hardon, causing me to groan into her mouth.
She hummed against my lips, “Feels like somebody enjoyed the view.”
I smiled, dropping my right hand down between her thighs, slipping a finger underneath the fabric of her bikini bottoms to find her soaking wet for me. “I think somebody else did too.”
She sighed softly as I began to rub between her slick folds, “Not gonna lie…you looked pretty fucking hot coming outta the water like that…better than any porno I’ve ever seen.”
I chuckled, leaning down to kiss along her neck as my fingers worked her over. “Sounds like my Kitten needs a little attention. Are you aching for me, honey?”
Her hands tangled in my hair as she nodded and let out a breathy, “Always.”
She began to grind against my hand as my fingers curled inside of her and my thumb made leisurely swirls around her sensitive bud. My lips found her ear as I spoke in a hushed voice, “Always so ready for me…such a needy girl. I want you to come for me, right here…where anyone could see.”
Her thighs began to tense around my hand as her body arched upward against me. I knew she was close. “You’re being such a dirty girl right now, you know that? Letting me play with you out in the open like this…and I think you kinda like it. You like being my dirty girl?”
I pulled back slightly to look at her even though she had a death grip on my hair. She nodded in response to my question, her brows pinching together and mouth falling open as my thumb increased pressure and speed. She was trembling now, so close.
I kissed along her jaw again, mumbling as I worked my way down the curve of her neck, “I’m gonna bend you over the kitchen counter and fuck you senseless as soon as we walk through the door.”
That sent her over the edge, causing her to bury her face against my shoulder to muffle the moans she was trying and failing to hold in. She collapsed against the towel, panting as a lazy smile spread across her face. Her hand slid down from my hair, cupping my cheek as she peered up at me, “The things you do to me…”
I chuckled, “Don’t worry, I’m not done yet…”
She narrowed her eyes at me as I stood and pulled her up from the ground with a smirk. Once she was standing, I didn’t hesitate to lean forward and throw her over my shoulder, giving her ass a good smack before I turned to walk back toward the ocean. She squealed and squirmed, but it didn’t do any good. I had a firm grip as I walked into the water up to my waist before dropping her in. She stood, cursing me as she sputtered out water and wiped at her face. I reached toward her with a smile, snaking my hand around her waist and pulling her into my embrace. She welcomed it, wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing me gently.
I pulled her out a little further into the water, so that we could bob with the waves. I felt her grip tighten slightly, but she didn’t stop me. She was trusting that I wouldn’t let her go. She gave me a mischievous smile as she wrapped her legs around me, now rubbing her center against my dick and further stoking the flame that was burning inside of me.
I groaned, “Now who’s being a fucking tease?”
Her lips moved along my neck, “Want me to take care of that little problem for you?”
I huffed out a laugh, “No. I actually meant what I said earlier…I’m bending you over the counter and fucking you when we get back to the house.”
She raised her head to look at me, her lips fighting a smile. I leaned in, brushing my nose against hers as I reached down to grab the globes of her ass, pulling her center tighter against me, “I’m also gonna spank you and make you come again. Maybe twice if you’re good for me.”
I could feel her thighs clenching against me as her mouth clashed against mine. Our hands explored each other as the kiss deepened, her right one making its way down between us to rub at the bulge in my shorts.
“Can we go back to the house now? Please? I need you…” she begged.
My forehead pressed against hers as I whined, “As if I could deny you anything…”
My hand moved to cup her cheek as I leaned back to take her in. She was so fucking beautiful. The sun was glistening off her tanned skin and emphasizing the gold flecks in her amber eyes in a way I had never seen. I felt dumbstruck by it as my heart began to flutter in my chest. She was literally taking my breath away.
One side of her lips twitched upward, “You OK?”
I nodded as my thumb stroked her face, “Yeah…I’m just…I wanna remember everything about this moment. I umm…” I love you.
I was so fucking close to saying it as she smiled up at me, but I was too afraid it would scare her away. It had only been two weeks. It was too soon.
“I’ve just never umm…”
My words trailed off as I shook my head to clear it. I didn’t know how to express what I was feeling but I needed to say something.
“I’ve never experienced something like this with anyone before…felt how I feel in this moment. I can’t exactly put it into words…”
Her hand dropped to my chest, no doubt feeling my heart pounding against it as her face softened. She leaned in to kiss me sweetly. The moment was ruined a few seconds later by a large wave that nearly knocked us over. She was back to sputtering out water and laughing as I pulled her toward the shore.
We wasted no time packing up and heading toward the house. I pulled her into the outdoor shower stall, our hands and mouths now exploring each other as we washed away the sand and salt and peeled our suits off. Once we were sufficiently clean, I wrapped her in a towel which she secured around her torso as I grabbed one to put around my waist.
She was barely through the sliding doors of the house before she dropped the towel and placed her palms on the island, arching her back toward me as she smiled seductively over her shoulder. I moved to stand behind her, gently running my fingertips up the center of her spine as her head dipped forward between her shoulders from the sensation. I felt her shiver as I made several passes up and down. On the last one, my fingertips continued upward, grazing the back of her neck before sinking my fingers into her hair, grabbing hold at the roots before tugging gently. She stood up straighter, melting into me as my left hand ran down the side of her body. I tugged her hair a little harder, angling her head to the side so I could access her neck to place gentle kisses along the length of it. Then, without warning, I smacked her ass. She moaned quietly. Another smack gave me the same result. Her breaths were coming faster now as the anticipation got to her.
My lips moved against her ear, “Tell me what you want, Kitten.”
Her eyes slid shut as she exhaled, “I want you to have your way with me…any way you want.”
I groaned against the side of her neck, “You’re gonna make me come saying shit like that.”
She chuckled, pressing her ass against me just a little more, which resulted in another smack. She smiled this time.
I tutted at her, “I think you like that…lean forward.”
She did so as I dropped down to my knees, giving the other cheek a couple of smacks for good measure before landing one right to her center, causing her to flutter around nothing. My hands found her thighs, massaging deeply as they moved upward to her hips. She was dripping wet and practically begging for more when I leaned forward and licked up her folds, causing her to cry out as she gripped the edge of the island until her knuckles turned white.
I dove into her cunt like a man starved, absolutely devouring her as my hands gripped her hips tightly to keep her from squirming. I had her falling apart within minutes as I sucked and licked at her bundle of nerves, giving the occasional slap to her ass as I worked. When she finally came, I didn’t stop or slow the pace, causing her to come for a second time in quick succession.
Her legs nearly gave out on the second one. So, I held her around the middle with one arm as I stood. After dropping the towel from my waist, I used my free hand to drag myself through her slick. She moaned quietly each time the head nudged against her over sensitive clit. After notching at her entrance, I sank in slowly. Taking my time so she could feel every inch slide in and out at the perfect angle.
I pulled her against my chest, one hand sliding around to grip under her chin, angling her face toward mine so I could see her. Her face was sweaty, flushed, and completely blissed out when she met my gaze. It had me feeling the same way I had when we were in the ocean. It felt like home. It felt like peace. I felt complete.
My forehead fell against hers, “You’re so fucking beautiful…perfect for me…never letting you go.”
I was babbling like a fool and completely losing myself as my other arm held her around the waist. She laced her fingers through mine, gripping my hand tightly as I clung to her. I know I said I would fuck her, but this was so much more than that. I kept the pace slow and languid, our breathing completely synced as we drowned in each other’s gaze.
I could feel Kat’s abdomen tighten as she quickly came again out of nowhere, squeezing me to the point that I could hardly move. Her jaw went slack, one of her hands flying up to twist into my hair as she let out a loud cry. I was seconds behind her, the feeling and intensity of her orgasm pulling me over the edge with her. My hand released her chin to reach for the counter as I attempted to steady myself, but it was no use.
My legs gave out, causing me to sink down to my knees - pulling Kat with me. I was somehow still pulsing and leaking inside of her as she melted against me.
I panted out a breathy, “Fuck…sorry. I-I…couldn’t stand…anymore. That was…intense.”
She sat on my thighs, both of us slumped against the side of the island as we tried to catch our breath. My arm around her tightened as I leaned in to kiss the side of her cheek. She turned, her lips seeking mine for a heated kiss that had me seeing stars.
When she finally pulled away, my attention was drawn to movement at my left. Kat’s eyes followed my line of sight and found Zee, who was sitting on the floor with her head tilted, her tail twitching from side to side as she looked up at us with concern? Confusion? Curiosity? I wasn’t really sure. Kat and I both burst into laughter, her leaning back into my chest as I hugged her snugly and laughed into her shoulder.
“Is this what it feels like when moms and dads get caught doing the dirty by the kids? Because I feel like that’s what just happened,” I said between chuckles.
Kat snorted out another laugh, “I dunno, but I think she’s kind of into it. She was totally watching.”
I gasped for air, “If that’s the case, she gets that shit from you. You’re the one who likes to watch.”
Kat leaned her head back against me, still laughing as I reached for a towel. I motioned for her to open her legs a bit to put it in place before I pulled out of her with a groan. Between the two of us, we had made an absolute mess of each other. We both shifted, stretching out on the tile because our legs still felt weak.
I sighed, glancing at the clock on the microwave, “I think we’re gonna be late for rehearsal.”
She waved a dismissive hand, “I don’t care…whatever that was…was totally worth it.”
We were late for rehearsal. Forty-five minutes late to be specific, but I really didn’t mind. There was more between us after that, somehow feeling more connected than we already were. Maybe it was just because of the intensity of everything. I couldn’t be sure. Whatever it was definitely carried over to our dancing. We were so on top of it, barely making the tiniest of mistakes. I felt newly energized and ready to win that fucking Mirrorball trophy as we went through the routine one last time.
Since we had a long day planned for Sunday and felt pretty on top of the choreography, we headed home early. There was no way to improve perfection after all.
Kat and I had just gotten home, and I was making some quick sandwiches for dinner when my cell rang. Lenny’s name flashed on the screen. I looked at the time, it was near 9:30 PM, which was sort of late for him. He tended to go to bed early since he got up before the sun rose most days. Worried something was up, I sucked some mayo off my fingers as I hurried to answer it.
“Hey Len…”
“What the hell have you been doing?” he barked out before I could even finish my greeting.
I winced, “What do you mean? I haven’t been doing anything.”
Kat’s wide eyes met mine in concern. I shrugged.
He sighed, “Who were you with today?”
I was so fucking confused, “I was at dance rehearsal with Kat. That’s the only place I’ve gone. Why?”
I could hear him shuffling papers around on his end of the line, “TMZ just called. They have pictures of you at the beach kissing a woman.”
I grimaced as my eyes shifted back to Kat. Fuck.
“How the hell did they get those? I was literally in my backyard on a private beach. There was no one else out there today.”
Lenny huffed, “Then you obviously have an asshole neighbor who wanted a quick buck.”
I sighed, “Fuck.” I switched the phone to speaker so Kat could hear, then I asked “Can you tell who it is in the pictures?”
“They’re asking if it’s Kat. Is it?”
Kat shrugged, waving her hand to go ahead and tell him the truth. “Can you tell who’s in the pictures?” I asked again.
He was quiet for a minute, obviously looking at them, “I mean…I can’t. Most of them are blurry. It’s pretty far away. I can definitely tell it’s you, but most of the pictures of the woman are from the back...Is it her?”
I scrunched my eyes shut as I rubbed at the bridge of my nose, “Tell them it’s not her…but yes, it’s her.”
He scoffed, “Fucking hell, Dieter. I thought we were done with this shit? What do you think you’re doing? Are you using again?”
My fists clenched together. I took a deep breath to calm myself as Kat came to stand next to me, placing a comforting hand on top of mine.
“No…I’m not fucking using again. It’s not like that Lenny, OK? This is different. We’re like…together. It’s not…not a fuck buddy situation or anything. I care about her.” I puffed air out of my cheeks in frustration, now pacing around the kitchen nervously as Kat watched me in silence.
“Look, we don’t want anyone to know yet. The producers can’t find out and the less that’s confirmed for Alec, the better. I need you and the team to keep this under wraps.”
Lenny was unusually quiet now. I didn’t know how to take that. “Len, you still with me?”
He cleared his throat, “Yeah, I’m just…processing. Does your therapist know about this? Is it really a good idea? I thought you weren’t getting involved with your co-stars anymore?”
I rolled my eyes, “Look, I’m tryin’ not to be pissed about this because I know where you’re coming from. It’s my fault, I earned that…but trust me when I say this is different. And yes, my therapist knows. She’s been supportive of it. She likes Kat.”
He sighed, “Ok, so how the hell are we supposed to handle this?”
I was still pacing as I talked through it, “Well…nothing we can do about the pictures. Maybe…”
I paused to think through my words before I continued, giving Kat a wide-eyed look as the idea sparked. “Maybe we take advantage of this. We say it’s not Kat…lie…say I’m seeing someone else but wish to protect her privacy. Use it as a misdirection…It might help settle the rumors about us and get the producers, Alec, and the paparazzi off her back some.”
Lenny chuckled, “You really think your publicist is gonna go for that?”
I shrugged even though he couldn’t see me, “I kind of don’t care. I’m going with it. I’ll head it off and do a cryptic Instagram post. Besides, it might be fun to fuck with Stacia and Joe some. I wanna see their heads explode when they realize their fairytale showmance isn’t happening after all.”
Kat snorted out a laugh over that one. She obviously thought it was funny, but I did want her input before I did anything.
“Kat, are you good with that? I don’t wanna do anything without your consent.”
She nodded, “It is a funny thought to be honest. I’m cool with it. They’ve been fucking with us this whole time. It’s time to beat them at their own game.”
I turned back to my phone, “You hear that, Len? This is probably gonna cause a little mayhem, but we’re here for it.”
He grumbled, “Your publicist is gonna murder both of us.”
I chuckled, “Not my problem…better start making some calls because I’m posting something as soon as we hang up.”
“Ugh, fine. Ok. This is all on you though.”
I smiled, “Thanks Len, you’re the best. We’ll talk soon.”
He grumbled some more then hung up without even saying goodbye.
I turned to Kat and smiled nervously, “Well, looks like we have a project to do tonight. We need to look through my camera roll…just…don’t judge me for what you find.”
Her brows furrowed, “Do I even wanna know what that means?”
I shrugged, “I mean…it’s just full of pictures of Zee and plants…and you.”
Her brows arched, “Oh, really?”
I grimaced as my face heated, “Yeah, I may have saved a few I found online…and I sneak pictures of you frequently.”
She shook her head and laughed, “I can’t wait to see this…”
As we sat eating our sandwiches, I handed my phone over. Kat scrolled in silence, an occasional smirk on her face before glancing up at me and shaking her head. After several minutes, her phone pinged a few times before she finally slid mine back over to me with a smile.
“What did you just do?” I asked.
Her smile widened, “I sent myself some pictures of you and Zee.”
I leaned toward her, narrowing my eyes slightly. “Maybe I need to check your camera roll…”
Her eyes widened, “Umm…mine is far more scandalous. I’ve saved some pictures of my own. You’ve done a lot of salacious photoshoots, you know that?”
I chuckled, “Ahh, filling up the spank bank then. I’m flattered.” I gave her a cocky grin and waggled my eyebrows, “If you want some nudes all you have to do is ask. I might even let you take them yourself.”
She shot a mischievous look over her glass as she took a sip, “Don’t give me any ideas…”
I grabbed my phone, snickering as I unlocked it. “So, I think the backlit picture of you and Zee, you painting, lying in bed from behind, and then the one you took of me in the pool kissing your leg will do. I don’t feel like it's obvious that’s you in those pictures. I’ll just do a whole photo dump and keep it vague. Let them speculate away.”
She huffed out a laugh, “You’re about to cause all kinds of chaos with this.”
I nodded, “Probably. I’ve never posted cutesy pictures of a woman before. It’s definitely making a statement…”
(More after the graphic.)
The post did indeed cause chaos. Likes and comments began to flood in - most of them asking if it was Kat in the pictures. I responded to exactly one person with, “Did I tag Kat? No.”
That set off a whole new onslaught of chatter and speculation. Kat egged it on by liking the original post and my comment. I could only imagine how my publicist was handling this. I was sure her head was probably about to explode.
When I woke up on Sunday morning, Kat was lying against my chest with her leg thrown across mine. She was still asleep, so I reached over to the nightstand to grab my phone without waking her. I was almost afraid to see what awaited me when I opened Instagram. I found more of the same stuff from the previous night. It was officially my most liked and most commented post ever.
I took a moment, taking in the sight before me. Ehh, we can do better than that.
As if I wasn’t already causing enough trouble, I took a short video clip of my hand rubbing along Kat’s bare leg. It was obvious we were tangled up in bed, wrapped in nothing but sheets with a nice view of the ocean outside the French doors. I posted it. There was no caption, only emojis, “👉👌🤯🤯🤯😏”
I threw in a few hashtags too, #PerfectMorning #MindBlown #WouldntChangeAThing
(More after the graphic.)
I was patiently awaiting a call from my publicist after that. She really might murder me over this one.
I sat with a smug smile as I watched the comments roll in. One in particular caught my attention.
Beasty45: I really hope you’re not screwing Kat over too. She deserves better.
I had to appreciate the sentiment behind it and really hated people thinking that way. So, I hit reply.
BangingBravo1: Wow. Never. She’s my bestie. All is well. 👍👍
It wasn’t a lie. She was my best friend as far as I was concerned.
I felt Kat stir against me. She groaned, hiding her face against my chest, “What time is it?”
I looked at the time, “You’ve got ten minutes before the alarm goes off.”
She let out another groan as her eyes blinked open, “What are you doing?”
I snickered and handed her my phone, “Causing more chaos.”
She squinted at the screen, then rolled her eyes as she handed it back to me with a laugh. “Now everyone knows you had a night of mind-blowing sex. Wonderful.”
“I know. I’m in trouble.”
As if on cue, a text message popped up from my publicist.
Janine: What the fuck are you doing?!?! Stop it. Now.
I cackled, tilting the phone toward Kat so she could see it, “That’s tame for her. I usually get a call with lots of yelling. Trust me. She’s dealt with worse.”
Kat shook her head, sighing heavily, “Today is gonna be interesting…”
We crawled out of bed soon after that to get ready for the day. We had a morning rehearsal slot, so that was first on our agenda. We had the routine down by this point, so we just focused on cleaning things up and tried not to wear ourselves out too much.
After rehearsal, we had our weekly spray tan. As we were walking into Television City Studios, I realized that I had a missed text from Janine from earlier in the day saying that TMZ had posted the article and pictures, so that was now out there for the world to see. They had to add an addendum once they realized I had made the social media posts, completely spoiling their 'breaking story'.
(More after the graphic.)
Kat and I were thankful the staff got us in and out quickly for the spray tan because we were definitely getting some looks and whispers. I imagine the confusion was spreading because we were fairly certain the majority of the cast thought we were together. We couldn’t help laughing about it as we left, wondering if Joe and Stacia had heard the news yet.
Kat ran to her house to check on things and pick up her guitar while I went home to feed Zee her dinner. Zee was in full menace mode as she tried to smack things off the counter while I prepared her food. It seemed to be her new favorite pastime, apparently enjoying getting me in a tizzy. She knew what she was doing, freezing mid shove when I would lock eyes with her. I concluded that she must think it’s some sort of game. A game that was fun for her and a nightmare for me. I ended up shooing her out of the kitchen so I could work in peace.
As I was finishing up with Zee’s gourmet meal, Kat came into the kitchen. Her brows furrowed as she pointed her finger to something behind me and busted out her best mom voice, “Zee, don’t you dare.”
I turned to see what the hell she was up to now, my eyes landing on her as she shoved a small potted succulent off the window sill. Luckily the pot did not break, but dirt spilled everywhere.
I sighed, “Why is this a thing all of a sudden?”
Zee meowed as she jumped down to rub against Kat’s legs and shot me some nasty side eye. Kat snickered as she shooed Zee away so she could clean up the mess.
“Maybe you’re not preparing her food fast enough. Best get to it, cat daddy.”
I huffed, “She messes with me, and I’ll go get some of that cheap nasty pellet garbage and she can have that. Little punk…”
Kat laughed at me as I continued to grumble about Zee’s impatience while Zee rubbed up against my legs and yelled at me until I finally set her plate down on the food mat. Zee rushed to her plate and ate with enthusiasm. I rolled my eyes at her as I turned to Kat, “All right, now that the diva is taken care of…you ready to go?”
Kat nodded, “Yep. Let’s get this sideshow on the road.”
My hand found its way to her hip and squeezed gently as I leaned in to give her a quick peck on the lips, “I should probably be offended by that, but it might actually be an accurate description…of me anyway.”
She playfully pushed my shoulder and laughed, “At least you’re aware. Let’s go.”
On the drive to Marc’s house, I could feel a twinge of anxiety forming in the pit of my stomach since I didn’t really know what to expect. From what I knew about Marc, he was a family man and seemed pretty drama free as far as his public persona was concerned. That helped some, but that didn’t mean there wouldn’t be alcohol or other things floating around. I knew it was something I would have to face eventually, but I wasn’t sure how ready for it I actually was. However, one glance in Kat’s direction suppressed those feelings. I knew she had my back, and I knew I would never do anything to let her down.
A short time later we pulled into Marc’s driveway and made our way to the front door. He greeted us, making small talk as he led us out to the back patio where he introduced us to his wife Valarie, and Stefanie’s partner, Kira. He was cooking hamburgers and hotdogs on the grill while everyone else sat around and chatted. So, as these things go, I joined him at the grill while Kat joined the ladies. We went into more small talk about the show, rehearsals, how I was feeling about ballroom dancing in general. It was all pretty surface level. Then, he asked me if I wanted a drink as he moved toward a cooler. I was taken off guard and sort of froze up.
He seemed to sense my hesitation as he opened the lid, giving me a gentle smile, “I’ve got water, a couple different kinds of soda, and if you’re feeling really adventurous…some juice boxes.”
I visibly relaxed as a smile tugged at my lips, “Water…please.”
His smile widened as he pulled a bottle out of the ice and handed it to me. He grabbed a juice box for himself, unwrapping the straw and stabbing it into the top with pursed lips. “Sorry, I probably should have worded that differently. I know you're sober.”
I shook my head and waved it off, “No big deal. Don’t even worry about it.”
His brows furrowed, eyes shifting up to meet mine as he took a quick pull from the straw before setting the drink down beside the grill. “No, I get it. I’m eight years sober myself. I remember how hard and awkward it was in those early days. People can be weird when you say you don’t drink…or do anything else for that matter.”
I nodded, “Yeah, I’ve been lucky enough to not run into that yet. I’ve been keeping to myself a lot…”
He picked up the tongs to flip the patties on the grill, “So how long has it been for you?”
I screwed the cap off the water and took a swig, “Ten months. Longest I’ve ever been sober since all that shit started.”
He smiled, “That’s good. When you hit a year, we’ll have to do something to celebrate. That’s a big deal.”
I nodded, feeling warmth creeping up my cheeks from the praise. “Yeah, I mean…I think I owe Kat for a lot of it. She’s been so supportive when others haven’t…It makes a lot of difference when you have people in your corner.”
Marc nodded, “That’s so true. I never would have made it without Val. She held me to it, and I’m so thankful for that.” He paused, turning toward me with raised brows. “You know, if you ever need to talk about it or anything…I don’t mind. Sometimes it helps to talk through things with someone that’s been there. Especially if you’re having a moment…”
He pulled out his phone, “No pressure, but we can exchange digits that way you have it.”
I reached to pull my phone out of my pocket, “Yeah…sure. That’s really nice of you actually.”
I gave him my new number, then he sent me a text message so I could save his to my contact list. That was a development I wasn’t expecting, but I was strangely happy about it. I suddenly felt much better about how the evening was going to go. Kat caught my eye, giving me a questioning look. Something must have shifted about my body language, and she could sense it. I smirked, giving her a quick wink before taking another drink of water.
My attention shifted back to Marc as he handed me a large platter to hold while he piled the different meats on top of it, announcing the food was ready. We settled into easy conversation as we ate, getting to know one another a little better. Everyone seemed at ease. There was no pressure or awkwardness. It was nice to have normal conversation without all the posturing and cockiness that often came with Hollywood type gatherings. It was exactly what I needed.
As we all became more comfortable with each other, they got a little braver with their questions. Which led to Stefanie giving Kat and I a deadpan stare before asking, “So what’s really going on with you two? I’m not buying whatever shit TMZ put out today.”
Kat and I gave each other a nervous glance, I shrugged and held my hand up in surrender toward her indicating I was good with whatever she wanted to say.
She took a deep breath, smiling nervously as her eyes roamed around the table, “Well…we’re…”
She paused, her brows arching as her eyes found mine again. “I mean yeah…we’re together, but we’re trying to keep it under wraps…for several reasons.”
They were all smiling at us now. Stefanie threw her arms in the air like she had just won something, “I fucking knew it! I knew it. How long?”
Kat and I laughed at her enthusiasm. “Not long. Just since New York,” I answered.
Stefanie playfully shoved Marc, “I fucking told you. You owe me $100.”
Marc rolled his eyes, “Fine, I’ll Venmo you.”
Kat and I both scoffed, laughing over the fact they were making bets.
Marc pulled out his phone and began tapping away, “Don’t worry guys, we won’t say anything. I know Alec is an issue.”
Kat gave him a tight smile, “Yeah, we figured it best not to provoke him as much as possible. He’s looking for any excuse he can find to make what happened be my fault. There’s also Stacia and Joe with their meddling…I don’t want to give them the satisfaction of thinking they had anything to do with this.”
Valarie’s brows furrowed, “So what’s with the beach pictures and social media posts then?”
I chuckled, “Well, I apparently have an asshole neighbor that took pictures of us in what is essentially my back yard and sold them to TMZ. They reached out to my team asking if it was Kat, so I told them to deny it. I’m just gonna play it off like I’m seeing someone else…a total misdirection. At minimum, it’ll cause a little chaos and make Stacia and Joe lose their shit. We’ll see how long it lasts.”
Everyone laughed. Stefanie clapped her hands several times before announcing, “If anyone asks, we’ve all met Dieter’s new woman and she’s amazing. I’m totally backing this chaos.”
Agreements sounded out around the table which had Kat and I leaning into each other and laughing. We relaxed some after that. Now that our secret was out, I felt more comfortable showing affection toward her and her toward me. It was nice not to have to hold back, to be able to reach out and touch her when I wanted to, to put my arm around her or rest my hand on her thigh. At least we now felt like we had a safe space among friends.
Marc eventually steered the conversation to Kat’s plans after this season ended, which was something she and I hadn’t really discussed. We had been very much in the present up to this point and I was suddenly feeling like an asshole for not asking about it myself.
Kat’s excitement was clear as she answered, “Well, I’m really hoping to open up my own dance studio…and I would love to offer some classes for things that are a little harder to find around here. I still need to do more market research to see how that would look, but we can always have the normal stuff to fall back on too. I haven’t got to put as much work into yet as I would like, but once the show is over, I’m gonna jump in head first and see what happens.”
Marc seemed extremely interested in this, leaning forward with excitement in his eyes, “That’s amazing. I was actually considering doing the same. I still haven’t decided if I’m gonna do another season or not…but I did want to look at something like that when I’m finished. Maybe we can team up.”
Everyone began to throw ideas around at that point. It seemed like there was a real possibility something was brewing. I made a mental note to bring it up with Kat again later. I wanted to make sure I was supportive and help in any way I could. I also liked the thought of helping her plan for the future, because I really hoped that I would be welcomed as part of it.
After we finished up with dinner, we moved to the garage. Marc had converted the space to his “Jam Room”. It was full of various instruments - a piano in one corner while a drum set sat in the other. Several different types of guitars hung on the wall along with some small handheld percussion instruments. Microphones and small speakers sat around the room. It seemed to be a proper setup for making music, which surprised me. I wasn’t expecting to walk into this.
Kat looked almost giddy as she took in the space, which surprised me. She seemed to be coming out of her shell, which was understandable. They did well to make us feel welcome and relaxed.
Marc pulled an electric guitar down from the wall while Kira took her place at the drums, making it obvious they had done this before. Marc began to strum a slow sexy tune as Kira joined in with a beat. Stefanie started dancing around the room to the music as Valarie sat down at the piano. My gaze turned to Kat, she looked amused as her eyes met mine.
I smiled, arching my brows as my head began to sway with the music. She laughed, her cheeks flushing as she watched me move. I took it up a few notches, rolling my torso and hips as I shuffled toward her. I raised my arms, moving them to the beat, biting my bottom lip as I enticed her to join me. I was dancing for her, showing her what else these loose hips can do outside of the ballroom.
“What’s the matter, honey? Too hot for you?” I asked.
I could hear everyone else chuckling behind me as I grabbed her hand and pulled her to the center of the room to do a little old fashioned dirty dancing. When the song concluded, I pulled her in for a quick kiss and everyone whooped and whistled, which had her blushing even more. Once everyone settled down, I leaned in next to her ear, “Want me to go get your guitar?”
She gave me a toothy grin and nodded. After another quick kiss, I made my way outside to the car. I was back with both of our cases within minutes as Marc found a couple more chairs and microphones for us to join the circle. A couple of hours passed by in no time as we took turns choosing songs to play. Those who knew them joined in while the others just vibed. It was honestly the most fun I had in a long time.
Stefanie asked if she could take some videos to post on social media. We all agreed, figuring it would be good content to promote the show since we were supposed to be doing that anyway. I felt less weird about it since it was a whole group of people from the cast, rather than just Kat and me. I still felt pretty strongly about not taking advantage of our relationship to boost my own career. Deep down I knew that any content of us together would do that, but I did want to have some limits on it. She wasn’t a plaything for me to use as I saw fit. It needed to be on her terms.
After several minutes passed, Marc suggested that we go live and maybe take some song requests from the chat and answer some fan questions. After some coaxing, we all agreed. As Marc worked to set up the tripod, Stefanie turned to me with a mischievous smile, “Dieter, please try and behave yourself around Kat. I don’t wanna be on TMZ tomorrow for encouraging an affair that will destroy your imaginary girlfriend’s heart.”
That drew a round of laughter from everyone as I scrunched up my face, “I guess I already have a reputation…I’ll try my best.”
Once Marc had his phone set up, he mirrored his screen to one of the TV’s hanging on the wall so we could all see the chat, then we went live. Within minutes there were over two thousand viewers. The numbers only climbed from there, with people posting in all caps about Kat and I being there.
Kat snickered and pointed at the screen, “I guess the Dieterina Stans found us already.”
We waved and said ‘hi’ to everyone. Since it was Marc’s Instagram account, we motioned for him to take over and share what was going on. The song recommendations began to roll in, with Marc and Stefanie taking the lead on the first two. After that, the chat flooded with requests for me and Kat to sing. I deferred to her on that, asking if she wanted to do one. She shrugged, then asked the viewers for some song recs. We laughed over some of the options thrown out as she joked about them not being her style. Suddenly her brows arched as if something caught her attention. A smirk formed on her lips, “Hmm, that one is certainly a mood.”
We all gave her a questioning look. “Which one?” I asked.
She pulled the lyrics and chords up on her phone and propped it on the stand in front of us. I couldn’t help cackling. It would definitely send a message.
She turned to everyone else, “You guys know Eyes on Fire by Blue Foundation?"
Stefanie bounced up and down, laughing maniacally and clapping her hands. Probably having the same thought that I did. “I do! I’ll do the backup vocals.”
I swapped out my acoustic for one of Marc’s electric guitars for this one, playing the intro as Kat and Stefanie started in on the ethereal vocables that the song opens with. Kat’s voice took on an almost haunting melancholic tone as she dove into the first verse. The smirk still graced her lips as a knowing look passed between us. This was totally a major ‘fuck you’ to Alec, and I knew I was going to love every second of it.
🎶Listen to Eyes on Fire Here.
I'll seek you out / Flay you alive / One more word and you won't survive / And I'm not scared / Of your stolen power / I see right through you any hour
I won't soothe your pain / I won't ease your strain / You've been waiting in vain / I've got nothing for you to gain
It was hard not to be absolutely mesmerized by her as she worked her way through the lyrics. It was obvious to me that something had finally shifted for her. She had taken back her life and was owning it - putting it out there for the world to see. She had escaped hell and was now controlling the narrative. It was her game to play. I loved seeing her like this, free to be herself and not holding back. It was a beautiful sight. My infatuation with her was probably written all over my face as I strummed the chords to the song, but I didn’t care. She was stunning like this.
Stefanie continued to sing the background vocals as Kat moved on to the next verse. Her eyes focused on me hungrily, our connection causing the air around us to vibrate. There was just something about us and music. It didn’t matter if we were dancing, playing, or singing. It caused an electricity to buzz around us, linking us together in a metaphysical way.
I'm taking it slow / Feeding my flame / Shuffling the cards of your game / And just in time / In the right place / Suddenly I will play my ace
I won't soothe your pain / I won't ease your strain / You've been waiting in vain / I've got nothing for you to gain
At this point, the song was reaching the crescendo. Kira joined in with the drums and Marc with the bass guitar. I layered my vocals along with Kat’s, the sound even more haunting now as we finished out the final verse.
Eyes on fire / Your spine is ablaze / Felling any foe with my gaze / And just in time / In the right place / Steadily emerging with grace / Felling any foe with my gaze / Steadily emerging with grace
The chat was going absolutely insane when we finished. I thought I even saw a few “fuck Alec” comments fly by in the chaos of it.
Stefanie began to clap again, “I think we should start a band. We’re kicking ass here.”
We all laughed as she turned to me, “Alright Bravo, you’re up. Whatta ya got?”
I pursed my lips, “I dunno, I’m open to suggestions…”
We watched the chat flood with comments, there were a few song recommendations but there were even more questions.
Where’s Bravo’s new lady?
Funny how everyone else has their romantic partner there except for Dieter.
Dieter is so full of shit. We all know it’s Kat.
Yo Bravo, where’s your beach babe? We wanna meet her!
Has Kat met Dieter’s new girl?
I let out a nervous laugh as I glanced at Kat. She winked then gave me a mischievous smile before turning to the camera, “Guys chill. Yes, I’ve met Dieter’s significant other. I know her very well. We’re all friends.”
I chuckled, “Yeah, don’t worry. She’s not being left out…she’s here with me.”
This is the biggest conspiracy since the moon landing.
I’m too high for this shit. What’s even happening? I thought he was gay?
This hurts my soul. You two are made for each other! #Dieterina #NotJustFriends
Maybe it's a throuple situation. No way they haven’t boned.
Poor Kat, she's like the 7th wheel now.
I couldn’t help laughing at the comments, “Guys, come on, be nice…back to the song recs please.”
A song title finally caught my attention. I took a minute to check in with Kira and Marc to see if they were familiar with it before adjusting the mic so that I could stand for this one. I needed to be able to move around a bit. Once I was situated, Marc got us started with the opening guitar riff for The Devil Wears Lace. It was a nice little blues song about desire, temptation, attraction, and obsession.
Kat, Stefanie, and Val provided entertainment by dancing around us. It was all good fun until Kat’s eyes locked with mine. Her moves became more provocative as she approached me. By the time I hit the chorus she was the only thing I could focus on.
🎶Listen to The Devil Wears Lace Here.
So light me in flames / Just as hot as you need / Let me see the good girl you wanted to be / All of my praise, only from me / I can be the one who could set you free / Fall from your grace / Turn up the heat / I feel I'm going down, hands gripping the sheets / Settin' the pace / Number the beast / Got me by the belt, heart skippin' a beat / The devil and me
She moved around me, against me, up and down my body. I played into it of course, wiggling against her as I belted out the lyrics - both of us giving each other mischievous smiles. This was definitely going to get the conspiracy theories going. I couldn’t bother to care because she looked so fucking hot dancing like this. The slow sensual roll of her body was a sight to behold, and it was all mine. I loved to see her let loose and have fun like this.
When the song ended, she strutted away before bursting into laughter. It was a little infectious, causing me to do the same. The chuckles of everyone else drew my attention to the monitor. The comments had gone completely unhinged by this point.
They definitely fucked, at least once.
Nobody pay attention to that vibrating sound…
This is how pornos start. I’m not mad about it.
So, IT IS a throuple then?
I think Dieter’s secret lady likes to watch. I don’t blame her…Kat’s ass is a work of art.
I’m still calling it a conspiracy. Kat is the beach chic. I know that ass and those thighs.
I huffed out a laugh and shook my head, “Can we not talk about Kat like that please? She’s not a piece of meat.”
Kat snorted out a laugh as she squeezed my arm in thanks. Marc jumped in to try and redirect the conversation, “Alright guys…I think one more and we’re gonna call it a night since we do have a rather long day tomorrow.”
He paused, obviously reading the comments about the show before chuckling, “Oh obviously Stefanie and I are gonna win the trophy.”
I laughed, “Hey now! We’ve gone all night without trash talking. Don’t you start…besides, obviously Kat and I are gonna win. I’m gonna call it though, we’ll be the top two groups. Nobody is beating us.”
Marc rolled his eyes, “Yeah, don’t try to sweet talk me after insulting me.”
Stefanie cut in, placing her hands on her hips as she spoke, “Now boys. Let’s play nice or Kat and I will drop you both and claim the win for ourselves.”
Marc and I both rolled our eyes in response as Val cut in, “Hey, how about we stop bickering and end with that song we did earlier. That was a good one…”
Marc and I both furrowed our brows, waiting for her to continue. She chuckled at our similar expressions before answering, “All on My Mind.”
We nodded as I shouted, “Ok…Kat we’re up.”
Kat and I took our place, sharing a freestanding mic as everyone jumped in with their instruments. I took lead, singing the main verses while Kat joined in on the chorus, alternating the lines.
🎶 Listen to All on My Mind Here.
I said, "Oh, honey, just like that" / I give you my loving and you give it right back / I said, "Oh, honey, just like this" / Hanging on white knuckle grip
Kat and I sang together for the remainder of the chorus while the rest of the group jumped in on the repeated lines.
It's all on my mind / Feel something when I kiss you good night / It's all on my mind / Feel something when I open my eyes / It's all on my mind / Feel that I could be your sweetest compromise / It's all on my mind / It's all on my mind
Our eyes stayed on each other, big smiles on our lips as we belted out the words in unison. I couldn’t deny that we sounded amazing together. Our voices complemented each other perfectly, especially when we leaned into the bluesy sounds of the music. Hell, truth be told, we all sounded pretty amazing as a group. Nothing could compare to how it felt singing with Kat though. We finished out the last verse together, completely at ease and having fun.
Well, me and my baby are the bass in the beat / A lo-fi rhythm, the sweat and the heat / Come on now lover, won't you follow my lead / And we'll move on into the night
The energy in the room was high as we finished it out after everyone gave it their all on the chorus refrain. It was probably the best one of the night. The chat was going wild with praise for everyone, but Kat and I were getting most of the attention.
Can we just get this crew their own show? So much more entertaining. 🙌
Dieter and Kat are amazing together. 😍😍😍
I had no idea Dieter Bravo had this much talent.
Kat, marry me. I’m NOT an asshole. 🙏🙏
Both? Both. Yes. 😏
We all said our goodbyes after that, promising to do another live soon since we had so much fun together. Once Marc disconnected, we all broke into a fit of laughter.
Marc was still chuckling as he said, “I’m sure Stacia and Joe are gonna have a lot to say about that.”
“Yeah, I’m sure my publicist will too. I’ve done nothing but cause chaos all day,” I replied.
Kat came over, snaking her arm around my waist. She fought a smile as she leaned into me, “And, the plot thickens. Apparently, we’re in a throuple with your mystery lady now.”
I shook my head, “Yeah…I’m not even upset about that. I’ve been accused of worse things. I’m not sharing my Kit Kat though…” I paused, reaching down to swat her butt cheek, “This is Bravo’s ass.”
Her eyes darkened as she attempted to give me an admonishing look, but she failed. She was totally turned on by that.
My brow arched as she fought a smile. We were completely oblivious to everyone’s amused eyes on us. When we finally turned to look at them, a blush crept up Kat’s cheeks.
I cleared my throat, “Well, everyone…this was fun. We should do it again.”
They all nodded with knowing smiles. “We should probably…uhh…head out. We all have a ridiculously early start in the morning and I wanna be well rested so I can kick your ass on the dance floor.”
Marc and Stefanie both gave me a deadpan stare before flipping the bird, causing me to let out a boisterous laugh. “Ahh, I think I’ve finally found my people.”
Kat and I said our goodbyes, grabbing our guitar cases then heading out the door. The air around us was thick on the drive home. Kat definitely didn’t help the situation with her hand wandering dangerously close to a very much at attention little Bravo. Her eyes cut toward me with a smirk on her lips every time she did it.
We started pulling each other’s clothes off as soon as we walked through the door. We may not have gone to bed at a decent hour, but we definitely fell asleep happy and satiated.
Monday mornings meant performance day. We followed our usual routine, arriving at Television City studios extremely early so we could get our camera blocking out of the way first. That went smoothly and we nailed the routine on each run through. We were feeling pretty confident about it as we headed toward wardrobe for our final fitting.
Kat’s costume for the week really had my attention. There was just something about her in red. It looked amazing against her dark features and golden skin, giving her a sultry edge. This dress was no exception, the way it draped around her body and gathered in the back accentuated her curves in the best way. Her back and shoulders were completely exposed, emphasizing the muscular contours. This was an area that I had never given much attention to on woman, but hers were so fucking sexy. I couldn't help staring as she raised her arms and turned this way and that for Amy to pin bits of fabric for some minor alterations. The image was seared into my brain, I knew it would be the subject of one of my paintings later.
I ended up ditching the jacket and tie that went with my costume. It felt too constricting for the choreography of this dance. Before it was all said and done, I only wore the red pants and red velvety button up shirt - leaving several buttons open and rolling up the sleeves, at Kat’s request, of course.
(More after the graphics.)
Hair and makeup were pretty uneventful. We managed to snag our usual ladies, filling our time with banter and jokes as they worked. They gave Kat a sleek up-do this time. I swear she rolled her eyes every time they added a new bobby pin. I sort of didn’t mind it though, because I knew I would be the one to help her take them all out later. She suggested they leave my hair in loose curls this week. To my surprise, they actually did. However, they still put a shit ton of gel and hairspray in it to my dismay.
We had managed to avoid Alec and Lana the entire morning. We assumed he was hiding out in his dressing room as much as he could. Word seemed to be spreading about what an absolute asshole he was to Kat, and many didn’t take too kindly to it. He was no longer the popular one of the cast and Kat loved every second of it. His ego was definitely taking a hit, which was the one thing that would hurt him the most.
We could only be lucky for so long. Alec and Lana were already in the staging area when we got there. He didn’t even bother to try and hide the disdain on his still slightly bruised face. Lana kept shooting glances our way with an odd expression. It was almost smug, maybe? I couldn’t quite figure it out. Kat and I made sure to watch ourselves since the backstage cameras were circling like sharks, being sure to keep our interactions friendly between each other. We also made a point to not look Alec and Lana’s way after the initial sizing up. We didn’t want to give the producers anything to work with.
Kat did the opening performance with Marc and the rest of their group, then rushed to change. I stayed with her the entire time, not chancing leaving her alone while the asshole was in the same building. There would not be another repeat of what happened after New York.
Alec and Lana were two performances ahead of us, still doing very well and obtaining a high score. They scored 2 points under Marc and Stefanie, which put them in second place for the night. If Kat and I had it our way, they would soon be in third.
We went through our usual routine of picking a hype song. I took the lead again this week, pulling up one of my favorite rock songs, You Shook Me All Night Long. Kat gave me that little smirk that I loved so damn much as she shook her head and laughed at me. I shrugged before transitioning into some of my goofy dance moves - pursing my lips as I wiggled my hips. She joined in of course, laughing at my ridiculousness through the entirety of it.
Before we knew it, it was our turn. Kat took her place in the center of the dance floor. As the music began to play, I walked toward her seductively, caressing her cheek as I circled her before grazing her nose with mine. After fanning her outward, our fast paced choreography synced with the quick beat of the Spanish style guitars. We commanded the attention of the room with our strong staccato footwork and vivacious presence. It was every bit as dramatic as we had intended it to be.
I’ll admit, I was nervous about my solo part. Up until this point, I hadn’t really had choreography this challenging without Kat by my side. The quick and precise body movements along with the flamenco style footwork while trying to exude assertive energy really was a lot of work. However, we only had to do it once. I didn’t have to pace myself for hours of rehearsal time, which meant I put everything I had into it. By the time I reunited with Kat to finish out the last part of the routine, I was feeling pretty damn cocky about the whole thing. The cockiness only added to the overall effect and took the performance over the top.
Kat’s movements were fluid and graceful as she danced around me, waving her flowy skirt. We continued with the stomping footwork, shaping our arms and hands into dramatic poses as we sidestepped each other. The electricity between us was buzzing at max levels as it always did when we performed together. The intensity of her gaze nearly took my breath away the handful of times our eyes connected. We were both in the zone and fucking killing it. We ended with a dramatic lift. I caught her by the hand before she fell back onto the floor for a dip to end it.
I pulled her upward and wrapped my arms around her as the crowd’s near deafening screams and applause sounded around us. I had to fight the urge to crash my lips against hers at that moment. There was so much adrenaline and passion between us that I could have burst into flames from it. I wanted nothing more than to get her home and work some of it off.
We went through the whole routine of doing the interview and waiting for our scores. With massive effort, we managed to keep our hands off each other in any inappropriate way. The whole thing was a blur. I don’t think I paid a lick of attention to anything the judges actually said. All I know is we got another perfect score, putting us in first place - again. To our surprise, we were met with more cheers than usual from the cast. Marc and Stefanie were the loudest among them of course.
Marc and Stefanie invited us out for a celebratory dinner afterwards. I left it up to Kat. She declined, citing how this week had worn her out and she wanted to go home and get some rest before we woke up to do it all over again. They were bummed but understanding. I was a little bummed too, until we walked through the door at my place.
Kat was definitely not as worn out as she let on, dragging me upstairs to the bedroom, peeling clothes off as we went. After a rather passionate round of sex, I made sure to give her a lot of aftercare that included a massage and hot bath while I made her some dinner. She might not have been feeling it right then with the rush of endorphins we both had surging through our veins, but I knew she would be soon. This week had been rough, and I wanted to see to it that she was properly taken care of so that we were ready to take on whatever week 8 had in store for us.
✨Fun Fact: The song that Dieter and Kat are dancing to is this chapter is called Uccen, which translate to "The Wolf". Given that Dieter wears that little wolf ring, I found it fitting.
✨Your Paso Doble video for this chapter can be found HERE. Seriously, one of the best performances ever. It won and Emmy! This couple is married in real life and always burn up the dance floor when they perform.
Next: Week 8
A/N: So, this got posted a couple days later than I had planned. It was a doozy to edit and I'm sure I probably missed a lot. I do apologize but work did indeed kick my ass last week. Hopefully it was worth the wait.
We got lots of smutty goodness in this chapter. I 100% blame Mr. Pascal for his holiday beach antics. There was just too much inspiration. Some of it was planned and some of it wasn't. I'm not sorry.
Dieter and Kat are getting pretty close. They are completely embedding each other in the other's life. All of Dieter's people know now and Kat's sister knows. Dieter is pouring his heart out and sharing about his past, yet Kat is still in her head about everything. Do we smell drama brewing there?
They've also made some new friends. How are we feeling about Marc and crew? Good or bad?
Dieter has started his Instagram live shit. More to come on that. Also...his Instagram posts, that man is stirring up all the drama with those. Good or bad idea?
Zee got some love in this chapter. I love me some good Dee and Zee drama. They are both shit heads and we love them for that.
There was so much that went down in this chapter that I can't think of what all to highlight. So, please do show some love with a reblog and sound off about it. I wanna hear all the unhinged thoughts!
Week 8 will bring us the Viennese Waltz, and with that comes LOTS of drama. Y'all might want to have a tissue handy, because the shit is going to hit the fan.
Until next time,
💜Mysty
Chapter Credits:
- Giving @avastrasposts credit for the SuccDee name. She saw it when I didn't, even though it was right there.
-Major credit to @bitchwitch1981 for song inspo. She turned me onto The Devil Wears Lace and All on My Mind.