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[b-does-the-write-thing]

HG prompt: Queenie decides to interfere.

Chapter 48 of the House Guest is up!

Wednesday June 14th, 2016

By the time Lacey arrived home, it was a quarter past midnight. David had dropped her off in his squad car, after Mary Margaret had insisted that it was too late to be walking home alone. For once, Lacey hadn’t protested.

“Queenie, girl,” Lacey called, flipping the lights on as she entered her apartment. She dropped her keys on the table, pulling out her phone to see she had no missed calls or texts. She didn’t know what she had expected really.

A rustle and a curious meow announced Queenie’s presence as she hopped up onto the table. Lacey reached out to pet her, but the cat just sniffed at her fingers instead of her traditional headbutt. Allowing the familiar her curiosity, Lacey held her hand out patiently for a bit, then moved to scratch Queenie behind her ears.

Queenie hissed.

“Jesus,” Lacey muttered. “Not you too.”

For the rest of trivia and all the way home, all Lacey had been able to think about was DoDo. In any other relationship, his sudden coldness, his heavy handed flirting, and irrational anger would have all pointed towards jealousy. Except that would mean…

Lacey sat down in the chair at the table. Queenie continued to eye her in annoyance. “I didn’t stop and pet Pongo, Dragon, or any other strays,” Lacey told her tartly. “Don’t be such a prima donna.”

Queenie approached her, hopping down into her lap. Lacey’s hands automatically went up to pet her familiar, who purred, butting against her chest and rubbing her head underneath her chin. “Oh, okay,” Lacey laughed softly. “I see how it is.”

Scratching at the mismatched fur, Lacey let her mind wander for a minute.

First, her the center of her back flared to life. She was safe, she was independent, she was home.

Next, her navel tingled, her muscles relaxing further. She felt her own sexuality in all its power, felt the blood rushing through her veins and the heat of Queenie’s beneath her fingertips. She was alive, she was healthy, she was whole.

Third, her center warmed. She knew herself, believed in herself, and trusted herself.

On the heels of this, her chest grew lighter as her fourth center opened. Remembering the friends she had just left, she reminded herself that she was loved, appreciated and cared for. A year ago, she had barely been able to open her heart to her father, much less friends, and had kept everyone and everything at a safe distance. Now, she had a pet, best friends, and a community.

Her throat opened next. She hummed, enjoying the feeling of it as Queenie purred in answer in her lap. Her mind was clearing already, fear and doubt melting away like snow. She had admitted she was scared already, but the root of it had remained buried. Now, the truth was tangible.

“He’ll leave,” she told Queenie softly. “Just like Mal will, just like everyone does. They’ll leave me.”

Why wouldn’t they? They had lives outside of Storybrooke. Even Regina wouldn’t be able to stay for long, having chosen to be in the public eye, she couldn’t very well linger here for much longer without aging. No one was that unobservant these days.

Even her friends would age and change. Mary Margaret was about to be a mother, Ariel would one day as well, and Ruby…Ruby was a werewolf. What happened to her and Victor after they defeated ZoZo? No one had really been able to tell her, or hadn’t wanted to.

As these thoughts rolled in, her brow center woke slowly as if to answer them for her. Queenie’s soft purring intensified slightly, her mismatched eyes turning to stare up at Lacey.

“Oh,” Lacey murmured, hands pausing in Queenie’s fur. In front of her, she could see everything. The threads and ties spreading out from her own body, twisting in every direction. One linked her to Queenie in her arms, a strand humming with intensity at the moment. Another went straight downstairs where Mal slept, one went out the window and ended at her neighbor’s. That one was patched and frayed, but still there.

She let her eyes close, feeling through them all one by one. Mary Margaret, David, Leroy, Ruby, Granny, Ariel, Regina, Neal, and Papa all were solid, humming with a thousand moments and feelings.

None of them compared to DoDo’s. She knew it at once, two strands intertwined, burning bright white. It vibrated at such a frequency, it did not appear to be moving at all, but it radiated heat like a stove. So, engrossed in this discovery, she did not realize what was happening at first.

There were seven centers in a witch’s body. Lacey had never fully accessed them all at once, never able to concentrate properly to Mal’s frustration. Here and now, as she saw her entire life stretched out, the truths she had hidden, the ones she had missed and the ones yet to be told were at her fingertips.

Then, the a buzzing at the crown of her head jolted her out of it entirely.

Queenie yowled in protest as Lacey jerked to her feet, clasping her head as if to keep it in place. Queenie dropped to the floor, and immediately shot under the table, continuing her very loud, very angry protest.

“What the hell?” Lacey panted, as her zen disappeared as quickly as it came. “What in the actual hell was that?”

Someone began knocking at the door, startling Lacey even further. Trying to catch her breath, she stared at the door, then over to the clock where the time read 4:55.

“Lacey!” Mal’s voice came from behind the door. “Shut your familiar up this minute or so help me-”

Lacey undid the wards around the door, and Mal did the rest. Unlocking the door with ease, she swooped in to find Lacey wide-eyed and hyperventilating, staying upright only through white knuckling the chair she had been sitting on moments earlier.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Mal sighed, but she somehow managed to get Lacey seated, a warm cup of tea in her hands, and a blanket around her shoulders. Queenie, she locked in the bathroom. It didn’t do much, as Queenie was still yowling angrily, but it dulled it somewhat.

“It won’t keep her for long,” Mal said, sitting down beside her, “but it’ll give you a moment to catch your breath. What on earth did you do to your familiar?”

“Me?” Lacey gasped. “I was just petting her and then…” She indicated her centers with a vague wave of her hand.

“Ah, she focused your energy,” Mal said, sitting back with a knowing smile. “Forced your hand. Clever little cat. You probably didn’t even realize she was doing it.”

Lacey shook her head. “I was channeling my centers…using the technique you showed me of using my familiar to…”

Mal laughed. “Yea, she even had you thinking it was your idea. Now, tell me, what did you do to make your cat interfere like that?”

Lacey shrugged. “I didn’t do anything! I came home from trivia, and one minute she’s pissed and the next she’s in my lap purring like there’s no tomorrow.”

Mal’s eyes flickered over to the calendar on the wall, eyeing the heavily circled date of June 20th, which was still four days away. “Did you see anything?” Mal asked. “She was trying to show you something.”

Lacey shrugged, looking away. She hadn’t seen anything she hadn’t already known, and she didn’t feel like discussing her life with Mal at five in the morning regardless.

“I almost opened my crown,” Lacey confessed, reaching up to gently touch the spot.

Mal’s eyes widened, impressed. “It’s rare for witches to do so without help,” she reminded Lacey. “And dangerous. Most witches go a little mad with the knowledge the crown can reveal.”

“Have you?”

Mal nodded. “Seers are able to open it through our own scrying. I have seen terrible and great things, but my experience tempers the knowledge. Others have seen beyond their own understanding, and it changes them, often for the worse. It is why it is the most feared and coveted ability of a witch.”

“Can Regina do it?”

Mal opened her mouth to say something but then shrugged. “Regina, like her mother before her, is a very powerful witch. It would not surprise me if she’s able to open her crown center, though she has never confided in me that she has.”

“Well, I know the Nun hasn’t,” Lacey said, trying to crack a joke. “Or else I’d be locked up in the Church’s dungeons by now.”

Queenie started to scratch at the door, her yowls growing into angry hissing.

Mal ignored it. “Reul is not to be taken lightly,” she said sharply. “If she’s been biding her time, there’s a reason. Fraternizing with demons is one thing, witches have done it for millennia. Hell, a few have even slept with them, as scores of halfbreeds on this earth can prove but none of them have ever actually dared to love a demon.”

Lacey wanted to protest, wanted to repeat what she had told Brad just last night, but the words didn’t come. Instead, the link she had just seen, the one burning bright white, two strands wrapped around each other like snakes, felt heavy in her hands once more. She looked down, expecting to see it again.

“Well, I guess you did see something after all,” Mal said, though her voice sounded more defeated than smug. “Yesterday you would have said something idiotic in reply to that.”

The spitting, hissing and scratching stopped abruptly, and as calm as you please, Queenie jumped up into Lacey’s lap, curling up and purring contentedly. The door to the bathroom was still closed and locked.

“I don’t…do I?”

Mal stood. “You need sleep,” she said simply. “You’re drained, and if you don’t get some rest, you’ll be worthless come Monday.”

“Mal, have you ever loved somebody?”

Mal stopped in the doorway, and exhaled slowly, her shoulders deflating. “Once,” she said. “Though it was not the kind of love you’re asking about.”

Lily.

“He told me about…your daughter.”

Mal nodded, but did not turn around. “He shouldn’t have done that,” she said, though she did not sound angry. “Though I suppose the timing is apt.”

Lacey didn’t understand. “Timing?”

Mal turned back to her, and for a moment, it was as if she was looking through her, at someone else. “The last time I opened my crown, I was pregnant. I saw my daughter’s body at the feet of a demon. She was young and fair, and dead before her time. When she was born, I left her to strangers here in this new world, hoping that she would grow up safely, not realizing what she was.”

Mal glanced over to where The Modern Guide to Witchcraft and Wizardry sat open on Lacey’s coffee table. “As it turned out, she found herself regardless.”

Lacey did not know what to say.

“When you appeared in my parlor, I thought for a moment…” Mal smiled. “You don’t look a thing like her, but you were alone too, with a demon’s fingerprints all over your heart. For a moment, you were Lily.”

Before Lacey could process that, Mal was gone.

As Lacey moved towards her own bed, she thought about Lily, a stranger who had died long before she had been born. Had she known she didn’t belong? Had she been searching for something to fill the gap left by her true mother’s absence? Or had she been drunk one night, and summoned the wrong demon into her life by pure accident?

She fell into bed, still dressed. Queenie scooted out her arms, but curled up beside her under the blankets. “You tired too?” Lacey said, her words slurred by exhaustion. Queenie blinked scornfully at her, but ruined it by yawning midway. “I think she spiked the tea with sleeping powder,” Lacey confided to her familiar.

She rolled on to her back, and threw a hand out to make sure the wards were still in place. Confident that they were, she closed her eyes, and sunk deep into Morpheus’s waiting arms.

She did not dream.

–

When she woke, it was still dark outside.

“Hmm,” she groaned, rolling over. Queenie mewed, having decided sometime in their nap to sit almost directly on top of Lacey’s head. Brushing fur out of her nose, Lacey reached for her phone on the night table, yawning hugely as she pressed the home button.

7:57, it read.

Underneath it was a slew of missed calls, texts, and voicemails.

Lacey blinked. It wasn’t even eight yet-

Oh.

Oh!

Lacey sat upright. She had slept all day! She hurried through the chain of message, grumbling to herself about her own stupidity.

Ruby had called twice, left a voicemail (Lunch?) and send a text about being ignored.

Ariel had texted her about getting together over the weekend.

Mary Margaret had called three times, left three voicemails and sent nearly ten texts. All were about being worried, was she okay, and that Gold hadn’t returned home last night.

No messages from DoDo.

Neal had sent her a snapchat, his own way of checking up on her.

And an unknown number who she assumed was Brad had texted at noon asking what time she wanted to grab dinner.

“Fuck,” she grumbled, and she shot him a reply back first.

Brad, shit, I just woke up from sleeping all day. Must have gotten food poisoning last night.

She added a sick emoji but did not offer to reschedule. If he called her back, she’d figure something out, but right now, she had more pressing business to tend to. She padded to the bathroom, Queenie hot on her heels.

It was almost ten by the time she got out of the shower. She had thrown on oversized t-shirt from one of her old conquests, and was just coming out of the bathroom, deciding between Gepetto’s or Shang’s when she stopped dead.

On the couch, in his usual form, DoDo sat as if he had never left. Even Queenie, the little traitor, was curled up in his lap, purring happily. In front of him, there was a pizza, two glasses of red wines and-

“Are those roses?”

Dodo moved Queenie off his lap, before standing. “Peace offering,” he said. “For your date tonight. I thought…you might appreciate it.”

Lacey stared at him in amazement. “You brought me pizza, wine and roses for my date with Brad?”

He nodded. “You mentioned previously…your favorite time to eat pizza is…post-coital. I assumed that in your plans for the evening, it would come in handy.”

“The wine?” Lacey asked, stepping forward.

He shrugged. “Wine is always a good idea.”

“And the roses?” Lacey moved closer until the couch was the only thing between them.

He cleared his throat, and Lacey had to resist a smile. “Decoration.”

“I canceled the date,” Lacey said before he could continue. “Well, I actually slept through it.”

Now, he took a step closer, peering at her intently. “Why, are you sick?”

Lacey chuckled. “No, Queenie just decided to be impossible last night.”

DoDo shot a look over to where Queenie was, and the cat stared back up at them innocently.

“So, you’re okay?” he asked. “Because you have to be in top condition come Monday or-”

Before he could finish, Lacey wrapped him in a hug. He went stock still for a moment, before slowly relaxing. His arms went about her tentatively, as if he was not sure how to hug. Lacey buried her face in his shoulder to hide her smile.

After about a minute, he spoke. “About last night…”

She did not want to talk about last night. She wanted to eat pizza, drink wine, and spent time with the one person who simultaneously made her crazy, and happy all at the same time. “Hey, do you want to a watch a few episodes of Happy Endings?” she asked. “I’m really behind.”

Though slightly bewildered, he nodded.

Tuesday, Lacey thought as she headed to her usual seat on the couch, grabbing a slice of pizza on the way, she’d deal with this Tuesday.

She did not see her phone light up, so she missed Brad’s call, too busy laughing at DoDo’s sullen face as she pointed out his favorite character had been asleep for four episodes in a row now.

–

Elsewhere, the other demon of Storybrooke waited. The summer solstice was fast approaching, but he could be patient, their time was running out.

As for tonight, he would hunt.

As if in response, a car drove by where he lurked in the shadows. A law enforcement vehicle, lights off as it cruised quietly along the streets. He grinned to himself, before stepping out from the alley. He raised his hand up, holding his side with his other, limping slightly as he tried to get the driver’s attention.

It worked.

Lights flashed on, the patrol car slowed before stopping all together.

Souls were easy to reap, he had no need of them anymore. Death was much more intoxicating, mortals cried so nicely as they died.

“Hey,” the officer said, rolling his window down. “Are you okay?”

He recognized this face. He had seen the little witch with him just the other day, one of her little friends.

This would be sweet.

“The alley,” he panted, gesturing widely back to where he had just come. “Some guy jumped me, and my girlfriend. She’s…she’s hurt really bad.”

The officer reached for his radio, calling for backup but it just fizzed and squawked back at him as unseen magic rendered it dead.

“Please,” he repeated. “She’s just over there-”

The officer nodded, risking one more look at the radio before hurrying out of the car. His face was concerned. “Lead the way,” the fool told him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “It’s going to be okay.”

He had no idea.

[b-does-the-write-thing]

Hey! I just finished reading your fanfic, the House Guest, and I love it so much! On your last chapter you said you were running a little low on prompts so I thought I'd give you some! -dodo and Lacey talk/dance in the rain -the conversation between MM and Lacey about Regina in the eighties -what's going on with Leroy? Will he be added into the mix? -Neal finds out Lacey kissed gold (I'd love his reaction) -Brad asks out Lacey and gold gets jealous I love this 'verse! Can't wait for more!

What wonderful prompts! So, I filled the Rain one here and the Neal one here, but the rest? The rest is below!

Chapter 47 of the House Guest is up!

Tuesday, June 13th, 2016

“And in fourth place, Better Late than Never!”

Leroy grunted in disgust as the emcee continued reading off the listings at Trivia Tuesday. “Why couldn’t we just keep the original name?” he demanded sourily. HIs usual team, The Hi Ho’s, played religiously every week but due to a bad case of food poisoning, Leroy had been forced to improvise.

“Because you’re on a team with three women, and we think it’s funny,” Mary Margaret replied cheerfully. Lacey poured her friend another drink from the pitcher, before filling up her own. “Thanks, Lacey.”

“No problem,” Lacey said smoothly. She had enjoyed watching Mary Margaret finding interesting ways to avoid drinking all evening. She had so far knocked one beer over, poured one back in the pitcher when everyone was yelling at the emcee, and ‘accidentally’ dropped the team’s pencil in her last glass. Ruby, meanwhile, was staring moodily off into the distance, and had barely said a word since they arrived.

“Hey, sister,” Leroy said to Ruby, “how about you contribute a bit next round?”

Ruby ignored him, which considering how close it was the full moon, was probably the best scenario.

“That’s half time!” the emcee announced cheerfully. “Thirty minute break and we’ll pick up right where we left off!”

“Oh, goodie,” Ruby grunted. Luckily, Mary Margaret and Leroy didn’t hear her, too busy looking up various tidbits from the earlier round.

Lacey took the opportunity to lean over to Ruby. “Look, if you want to go…”

Ruby checked to make sure the rest of the table wasn’t listening, before sighing. “No, it’s just…my cycle lines up the full moon now too, so it’s just an all around hormonal, emotional, suckfest. Plus,” she held the phone up for Lacey to see the text screen,” Victor and Archie are driving me nuts.”

Victor had turned out to be a very needy zombie. Ruby and he had bonded over their situations, and despite sex being firmly off the table (“Ew, Lacey! He’s dead!”), the two of them had grown almost attached at the hip.

“Victor wants you to come over later?” Lacey read in disbelief. “To talk? Since when does Victor ‘talk’?”

Ruby shook her head, and lifted a finger. “Oh, it gets better,” she said before clicking Archie’s name to show his last message, or least part of it.

Lacey’s eyes widened. The therapist it seemed had enough of talking, though Lacey could have gone her entire life without knowing the carpets matched the drapes. “When did all this start?” Lacey asked. Archie would never send anything like that unless heavily encouraged, if not outright demanded. “Don’t play innocent, Ruby, I know Archie well enough to know he didn’t wake up this morning and decide to send a dick pic.”

Ruby winced. “I may sent a few first,” she admitted. At Lacey’s look, she clicked the phone shut to toss it back in her purse. “Okay, okay, it started in May, before I found out about Victor and I mean…we haven’t actually…but…”

“I thought you didn’t like Victor like that?”

Ruby shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know! It’s just different with Victor. Archie’s sweet but Victor…Victor just gets it, you know?”

“What about Victor?” Both of them turned to find Mary Margaret listening intently. “Leroy went to the bathroom,” she told them.

“Victor’s a zombie,” Ruby said bluntly.

The answering curse of surprise was loud enough to cause a few tables to turn around and look at them. “I mean. oh my God!” Mary Margaret amended, at a much lower volume.

“Not God,” Ruby said, taking a large drink of her pilsner. She quickly explained the situation, while Lacey kept an eye out for Leroy. Luckily, the line to the bathroom was longer than usual.

“Geez,” Mary Margaret said, eyes wide as saucers. “So…Victor’s dead?”

“Yea,” Ruby sighed. “No pulse.”

“So, can he still…”

“Mary Margaret!” Lacey said in delighted shock. “Are you actually asking her that?”

“Of course I’m not!” the other woman responded, in self righteous outrage. “I was just…checking.”

Ruby laughed. “He claims he can, but it’s too weird.”

Mary Margaret nodded, but then proved once again she was more observant that she let on. “So, what about Archie?”

Ruby groaned, letting her head fall into hands. “It’s…complicated.”

“How?”

Before Ruby could respond, her phone started ringing incessantly. She fished it out of her purse, ignoring the other trivia patrons dirty looks and sighed when she saw the caller ID. “It’s Victor,” she said. “I’ll be right back.”

The two of them watcher her go, and Lacey just barely caught Mary Margaret switching out her untouched glass with Ruby’s now almost empty one. Since Leroy was still missing, Lacey decided to see if she could get Mary Margaret to spill the beans before she let on that she knew.

“So, Mary Margaret,” she said breezily, taking a drink of her own beer. “What’s new?”

Her friend smiled. “Well…”

Lacey leaned forward, fully expecting the schoolteacher to tell her all about the pregnancy.

“I dug up some old polaroids!”

Lacey blinked. She hadn’t been expecting that.

Mary Margaret was already reaching for her phone, pulling up her images and pushing it over to Lacey to see. “I thought you might want to see them.”

“Oh, my god,” Lacey breathed. Regina stood at what looked to be a fancy dinner party, with a high necked blue dress, puffy mutton sleeves and her short hair teased out a la Melanie Griffith. “Where did you get these?”

“Family album!” Mary Margaret said proudly, reaching over to swipe right. Another picture, this time of an older man and Regina at the town hall. Regina clutched red, red roses in her hands, her wedding dress a spitting image of Madonna’s Like a Virgin video and her makeup just as dramatic. The man looked equal parts proud, embarrassed and uncertain of the entire situation.

“Is that-?”

Mary Margaret’s smile faded a bit. “Yea, that’s my dad,” she said softly. “He died a year later.”

“I’m sorry,” Lacey said, remembering how she had felt when her mother died. “How old were you?”

“Twelve,” Mary Margaret said. “I think he married her because he wanted to make sure I had someone, you know, in case.”

“I was sixteen when my mother died,” Lacey replied. “I still had my dad but…”

Mary Margaret didn’t say anything, but squeezed her hand. Lacey quickly swiped to the next page, to see a young Mary Margaret smiling up at Regina adoringly, in a matching pant suit. Lacey couldn’t help the giggles.

“I know,” Mary Margaret sighed. “I thought she was the coolest. Begged her for an outfit just like that, and my dad finally convinced her it would be cute.” Regina’s photographed face did not seem to agree. She was looking off camera with a pained look, avoiding her mini me’s gaze. “I found out she was a witch around then,” Mary Margaret shared. “After that, she didn’t even bother to pretend to like me. Told me if I crossed her, she’d turn me into a toad.”

“Screw her,” Lacey grumbled. “You were a kid.”

“I was a liability,” Mary Margaret repeated, in a fairly accurate imitation of Regina. “She was stuck with me after Dad died, and vica versa.” Mary Margaret shrugged. “She moved us here when I was eighteen, and got me a job where she could keep an eye on me.”

“You don’t have a degree?”

Mary Margaret shot her a look. “Of course, I have a degree. I started out as a secretary at the school until I completed my bachelor’s online.”

“Five minute warning!” the emcee announced.

Mary Margaret’s phone started buzzing in Lacey’s hand, David’s name flashing up on the screen. Lacey wordlessly handed it over, as her friend hopped up to join Ruby outside. “Be right back,” Mary Margaret said, hurrying out front.

“Men,” Lacey muttered.

“What about them?”

Lacey turned to see a familiar, and at the moment, very welcome face. “Brad!”

He smiled, indicating the seat Mary Margaret had just abandoned. “May I?”

“Please,” Lacey said, leaning over the table to bat her smile up at him. “What are you doing here?”

“Came in for a drink,” he said, nodding towards the bar. “Was about to leave when I saw it was trivia night, but I saw you and figured I’d say hello first.”

“Glad you did,” Lacey said. “Though when I never heard from you after our dinner date, I just assumed you had run for the hills.”

He held up his hands up. “Wait, that was a date?”

“Of course it was a date,” Lacey scoffed. “What did you think it was?”

“You talked about your old roommate for half of it,” Brad said with a small shrug. “In my experience, when a woman talks about someone nonstop for two hours, even if she’s complaining about him, there’s something there. I just figured…”

“Oh! Oh, no,” Lacey said, holding up her own hands. “It’s not like that. We’re just…friends.”

“Just?”

“Just,” Lacey repeated firmly.

“Good,” he said, flashing a relieved smile. “So, I can ask you out properly then.”

Lacey had enjoyed their dinner back in the spring, though to be fair, she had been distracted by all the magical mischief at the time. Not that now was any better, but if she was going to die come Monday, she wanted to have a lot of sex before then. So, why not Brad?

“How about Saturday?” he suggested.

“Or tomorrow?”

He laughed. “Well, I wasn’t going to be too forward but perfect. Tomorrow it is.”

“Hey, sister, this guy bothering you?” Leroy had returned, and was scowling at Brad.

“No,” Lacey said, reaching up to lay a hand on Leroy’s tense arm. “Leroy, this is Brad. Brad, my friend Leroy.”

“Nice to meet you,” Brad said, but he did not outstretch his hand. Leroy grunted in reply. “Well, I suppose I should be going,” he said after an awkward pause. “Let you get back to trivia.”

“Yea,” Leroy grunted. “Good idea.”

“I’ll text you about tomorrow,” Brad said to Lacey, and then, with a small wave, he disappeared back through the crowd.

Leroy quickly took the abandoned chair, frowning after him. “Who was that creep?”

“Nobody,” Lacey lied. “What took you so long?”

Leroy’s face flushed. “Long line.”

“Oh?” Mary Margaret said, returning to the table with a flush on her face. “Or might it have something to do with the pretty girl I just saw leaving the alley while you slipped through the back door?”

Leroy choked on his beer.

Lacey, intrigued, scooted her chair forward. “What?” she demanded. “Leroy, you dog!”

“It’s not like that!” he said gruffly.

“Sure looked like it,” Ruby said, joining them. “Poor girl was nearly running when she passed me.”

“Who is she?” Lacey asked the two of them. “Anyone we know?” Both shook their heads, while Leroy put a death grip on his beer. “Hmm,” Lacey said thoughtfully, tapping her chin. “Leroy’s got a secret girlfriend…”

“She ain’t my girlfriend,” Leroy grumbled into his drink. “She’s just a…a friend.”

“Right,” Ruby said, frowning when she saw her glass was refilled. With a shrug, she drank it anyway. “The way you two were looking at each other? Not likely.”

“She was cute!” Mary Margaret reassured him. “We would have loved to meet her. Why didn’t she stay?”

“She’s a nun.”

Lacey blinked. “Excuse me?”

Leroy let out a string of obscenities under his breath. “She’s a nun,” he finally repeated. “Met her while I was doing some repairs at the covenant. She volunteers at the hospital on Tuesdays…and we meet outside during the half time to…talk before she has to get back.”

Lacey met the Ruby’s eyes across the table. The Church had seemingly left them alone for the most part, opting for a wait and see approach, but if a nun was spending time around Leroy…it was unlikely it was for his charming attitude.

“Leroy,” Mary Margaret started gently, “do you think this a good idea?”

“Two minutes!” the Emcee announced. “Cell phones away please!”

“Seriously, Leroy,” Lacey added. “A nun for Chrissakes?”

“You’re one to talk,” he shot back angrily. “You just agreed to go on a date with some weirdo, when everyone knows you’re got that weird thing going on with Gold.”

“What weirdo?” Mary Margaret asked, confused.

“You have a date?” Ruby whistled. “With who?”

Point to Leroy.

“His name is Brad,” she said finally. “Met him a while back around Christmas and he pops up from time to time.”

“I remember him,” Mary Margaret said with a frown. “He’s a little…intense, don’t you think?”

“No one is more intense than Gold,” Ruby corrected her, the subtext loud and clear.

Enough already!” Lacey exclaimed. “So what if I have a date with a guy tomorrow? I’m just going to screw his brains out and then I’m going to move on, like I always do.”

“What about Gold?” Mary Margaret asked.

“What about him?” Lacey demanded. Her friend shrugged, looking hastily away.

Before Lacey could smooth things over, Leroy chuckled. “Speak of the devil.”

Lacey turned to find DoDo approaching. He had his glamour in place, and even the mirrors reflected Gold’s now familiar face back to them. Ruby and Mary Margaret wisely kept silent as Gold joined them. He seemed to know he was being discussed, turning to Leroy with a pointed look.

“Leroy,’ he greeted, “nice to see you again.”

Leroy nodded, always a bit uncomfortable around Gold despite his gruff demeanor.

“What are you doing here?” Lacey demanded, but before he could answer, David appeared at his elbow.

“I invited them,” Mary Margaret said apologetically. “I hope that’s okay?”

“First question!” the emcee shouted as the chatter died down. “What are the ingredients to a Harvey Wallbanger cocktail?”

“Vodka, OJ, and galliano,” Lacey recited and Leroy grabbed for the pencil to jot it down. “Of course it is,” Lacey said, but she wasn’t sure she meant it.

“Well, I’m inviting Victor then,” Ruby announced, going for her phone.

“No phones!” Leroy snapped.”We’ll get disqualified.”

“Fine!” Ruby growled, crossing her arms. “But next time, I’m inviting him.”

“There ain’t going to be a next time, sister,” Leroy complained.

“Fun evening?” Gold whispered to her, and Lacey instinctively smiled.

“Ask Mary Margaret to see her family photos,” she answered with a wink. “I’m thinking of posting them on the city website.”

“What are you two whispering about?” David called out, and she broke away to find the table staring at them with knowing smiles.

“Merely the changing fads of fashion,” Gold replied smoothly.

“Hey, Lacey,” David said, shrugging out of his deputy jacket. “Before I forget, I was thinking about cooking a big dinner tomorrow night since I’m off duty, would you want to come over?”

“She can’t,” Leroy said, returning from turning in the answer. “She’s got a hot date tomorrow night.”

Gold went cold beside her. “A date?” he asked nonchalantly, looking down at her. “Who with?”

“Nobody,” Lacey said pointedly, raising her brows at him to indicate she didn’t want to talk about it.

“The answer is- Vodka, OJ, and galliano!” the emcee told the crowd. “Next question-”

Lacey didn’t hear it. “His name’s Brad,” Ruby said with disgust. “Looks like a Ken doll.”

“Ruby!”

“What?” Ruby said, shooting her a dark look. “It’s not like it’s a secret, you just told us five minutes ago you were going to go screw Brad’s brains out tomorrow.”

“What about you, Gold?” David asked, trying to talk over Ruby. “Still down for dinner tomorrow night?”

“We’ll see,” he said smoothly. He flicked a finger for the waitress. She hurried over, his glamour as powerful as ever apparently.

“Wait, what was the question?” David said to no one in particular.

“I’ll have a whiskey neat, three fingers,” Gold said as the waitress arrived, wiggling three of his fingers at her. The girl blushed crimson, as his voice turned his words into something much more suggestive.

“Hey!” Lacey said, elbowing him. “Don’t be gross.” He merely ignored her.

“Why! Aren’t you dirty as hell?” the waitress giggled. It was clear she didn’t mind in the least.

“Rather ironic really,” he said, leaning over to her. “That’s exactly where I’m from.”

Their server burst into laughter, and with a wink, hurried away to get his beverage. She passed two other tables who were trying to get her attention in her hurry to get to the bar. Lacey stared at Gold in disgust.

“Aubergine is another word for eggplant,” Mary Margaret said to the unheard question. Leroy handed the slip of paper over to her, obviously not interested in learning how to spell the word. She wrote it down, and got up to turn it into the emcee.

Lacey continued to scowl at Gold. “What?” he asked, turning to her with a raised brow.

“What’s with you?” she demanded, crossing her arms. “You come to trivia to pick up the wait staff?”

The rest of the table was pretending not to be listening, but failing miserably.

“I was invited,” Gold said chillingly. “Or don’t you remember?”

“Shit, you’re pissed,” Lacey realized in amazement. “Why?”

“Uh, guys?” David said from across the table. “You don’t know what occupation refers to it’s apprentices as devils, do you?”

“Printers,” Gold snapped. “And I’m not pissed.”

The waitress returned, holding a whiskey like the holy grail. “Here you are, sir,” she giggled, waiting for him to take it from her. Lacey reached up to snag it, tossing it back before Gold could so much as blink.

“Very like you,” Gold snapped as the waitress blinked in surprise. “Taking what you want without consideration,”

“Oh, cause you’ve never done anything selfish in your life?” Lacey shot back. “Call your son sometime if you need a reminder.”

Someone cleared their throat. Gold stared back at her, before he laughed. Lacey blinked in confusion, as he turned back to the group. “My apologies,” he said, standing. “I forgot I had a prior engagement.”

Before anyone could say something, he had turned to leave. The waitress, unsure of what just happened, turned to Lacey with a scowl. “Are you buying that?” she asked, indicating the empty glass.

Lacey ignored her, the emcee, and her friends. She followed after Gold, catching up with him just outside the Rabbit Hole. “Hey!”

He turned, and Lacey almost faltered at the anger burning on his face. “What?” he snapped.

“What the hell was all that about?” Lacey demanded.

“Nothing,” he replied, though if looks could kill, she’d be ten feet under by now. “Excuse me if I don’t want to spend an evening answering trivial questions for bar money.”

They stood out on the sidewalk, less than five feet away from each other, but it felt like miles.

“Are you…mad about Brad?”

He opened his mouth furiously, but just as suddenly as the fire had started, it died away. For an instant, she could almost see DoDo underneath the flesh, and her fingers reached out almost on their own to rest against his arm.

“DoDo?”

His eyes lingered on where her hand rested against his jacket. He did not pull away.

“DoDo,” Lacey repeated, taking a step closer. “I might not be here Tuesday…”

“Mortality is boring,” DoDo said, though his words lacked any real punch. “You wish to escape your fear through meaningless carnal intercourse.”

“Yea,” Lacey laughed hollowly. “That’s not unheard of.”

“No,” he agreed, eyes finding her’s. “It’s not.”

Her breath left her. Was he…was he suggesting…

“I should go,” he said, and before she could say anything, he disappeared from the street entirely, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

–

This chapter is dedicated to @obxjesse for sharing an absolutely wonderful story with me today and making my whole life decade millennia year.

Next time: Queenie decides to interfere.