Boy Bites
Summary: You offer your paratrooper part of your sandwich, they take a bite that's much too large, and suddenly you're explaining the difference between a boy bite and a lady bite.
Warnings: None! Just daily nonsense from the uneasy company
William “Wild Bill” Guarnere
You held the sandwich out between you on the blanket, smiling softly. “Here. Take a bite.”
Bill leaned in and took a massive chomp, nearly half the sandwich disappearing in one go. You gasped so loudly a few soldiers nearby turned to look.
“William Guarnere!” you scolded, eyes wide. “That was a boy bite! A huge, greedy boy bite! You’re supposed to take a lady bite!”
Bill froze mid-chew, then started laughing so hard he almost choked. He covered his mouth with one hand, shoulders shaking. “A what now?”
“A boy bite!” you insisted, cheeks pink but trying to look stern. “Men take these giant bites like they’re trying to win a contest. It’s not polite!”
Bill swallowed, still grinning like an idiot. He wiped his mouth and leaned in to kiss your temple. “God, you’re adorable when you scold me. Say ‘boy bite’ again. I like it.”
You huffed, but the corner of your mouth twitched. Bill stole another (slightly smaller) bite and winked. “There. That one was a gentleman bite. Happy now, Mrs. Guarnere?”
Denver “Bull” Randleman
You offered the sandwich with both hands like it was something precious. Bull leaned down and took a huge, solid bite that left the sandwich noticeably smaller.
Your eyes went wide. You actually gasped. “Bull! That was a boy bite! Look how much you took!”
Bull blinked at you, still chewing, then glanced down at the sandwich like he was only just noticing. A slow, warm smile spread across his face. “A boy bite?”
“Yes!” you said, half scolding, half laughing. “That’s what men do. They take enormous bites. You’re supposed to take little bites!”
Bull chuckled, low and rumbling, and reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “Never heard it called that before. Kinda like it.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Sorry, darlin’. I’ll try to take a… what’d you call it? A lady bite next time.”
He took a deliberately smaller bite after that, still smiling the whole time like you’d just handed him the best gift in the world.
Eugene “Doc” Roe
You held the sandwich out to him with a soft smile. Eugene leaned in and took a big, hearty bite without thinking.
You gasped so dramatically he actually froze. “Eugene! That was a boy bite! You took such a huge piece!”
He blinked at you, cheeks still full, then slowly finished chewing. A quiet, fond laugh escaped him as he wiped a crumb from the corner of his mouth. “A boy bite?”
“Yes!” you said, eyes wide and earnest. “Men take these giant bites like they’re trying to prove something. You’re supposed to take little, polite bites!”
Eugene’s smile grew softer. He reached out and gently took your free hand, thumb brushing over your knuckles. “Never thought about it like that. Guess I’ve been doin’ it wrong my whole life.” He leaned in and kissed your cheek. “I’ll try to take a lady bite next time. Don’t want you scoldin’ me again.”
He took a much smaller bite after that, still watching you with that warm, quiet amusement like you were the most charming thing he’d ever seen.
Ronald Speirs
You offered him the sandwich with that gentle little smile of yours. Speirs leaned in and took a clean, decisive bite that removed a very large portion in one go.
Your eyes widened. You actually gasped and pulled the sandwich back slightly. “Ronald! That was a boy bite! Such a big one!”
He paused, studying your face. Then, very slowly, the corner of his mouth lifted. “A boy bite?”
“Yes!” you said, voice soft but scolding. “Men take these enormous bites like they’re conquering the sandwich. You’re supposed to take small bites!”
Speirs looked at the sandwich, then back at you. Something almost tender flickered in his eyes. He reached out and brushed his thumb lightly across your lower lip where a crumb had landed. “I’ve never heard it called that before.” He leaned in and kissed the spot he’d just touched. “I’ll try to remember. Lady bites only from now on.”
He took a noticeably smaller bite after that, still watching you like your reaction was the most interesting thing that had happened all day.
Joe Liebgott
You held the sandwich out between you. Liebgott leaned in and took a massive, unapologetic bite that left the sandwich looking half-eaten.
You gasped so loudly he nearly choked on his food. “Joe! That was a boy bite! A huge, ridiculous boy bite!”
He swallowed, eyes sparkling with laughter. “A what?”
“A boy bite!” you repeated, cheeks flushed but trying to look stern. “That’s what men do. They take these giant bites like the sandwich owes them money. You’re supposed to take little bites!”
Liebgott stared at you for a second, then burst out laughing so hard he had to lean forward and brace his hands on his knees. “Oh my God. ‘Boy bite.’ That’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.” He wiped his eyes and grinned at you. “Say it again. Please. I need to hear it one more time.”
You crossed your arms, trying not to smile. “It’s not funny!”
“It’s adorable,” he said, still chuckling. He leaned in and stole a much smaller bite this time, then kissed your cheek. “There. Lady bite. Happy now?”
Shifty Powers
You offered him the sandwich with that sweet little smile. Shifty leaned in and took a solid, hearty bite without thinking twice.
Your eyes went wide. You gasped and pulled it back slightly. “Shifty! That was a boy bite! You took such a big piece!”
He blinked at you, still chewing, then glanced down at the sandwich like he was seeing it for the first time. A slow, sheepish smile spread across his face. “A boy bite?”
“Yes!” you said, voice soft but scolding. “Men take these huge bites like they’re trying to win something. You’re supposed to take little bites!”
Shifty let out a quiet, warm laugh and rubbed the back of his neck. “Never heard it called that before. Guess I’ve been doin’ it wrong.” He leaned in and kissed your cheek, still smiling. “I’ll try to take a lady bite next time. Don’t want you fussin’ at me.”
He took a much smaller, more careful bite after that, watching you with soft eyes like you’d just done something incredibly charming.
