seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Malaysia
seen from Maldives
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United States
seen from Maldives
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United States
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from China
Don’t Die
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22804762
Days 73 to 76
There was a quick knock on the door, the signal we’d agreed on to wake someone up when it was time for their watch. It was mine. Daryl woke up instantly as well, ready and attentive.
“Shh, it’s okay,” I told him and I sat up. “It’s just my turn to watch, don’t wake up.”
“You’re on tonight?” he asked, his voice sleepy and tired.
“Yeah, a couple of hours. Gonna be back at four to sleep some more.”
“’Kay… Careful out there.”
“I will. Just sleep, love…”
He answered with a sleepy hum and was probably already asleep when I quietly left the room. The house was silent and dark, it felt peaceful. The blue night light coming through the windows were enough to illuminate my way downstairs and to the back door.
Day 65, part 2
The radio was silent, and the cars moved slowly down the streets, as if numb. My sobs slowly subsided and I forced myself to breath, just breath and gather my control back. I wish I didn’t have to let go, though. It was good there, at Daryl’s chest, his arm around me, hand resting on my back, grounding me. Sniffing and drying my face, I forced myself to let go, returning to my seat, but still closer to him that what was necessary now. I looked down as I tried to clean up my face, embarrassed. This had been the most obvious demonstration of weakness I had ever given in front of Daryl – in front of anyone, for that matter, and it was the second time in two days that I cried in front of him.
“Sorry,” I mumbled after a while, still looking down.
Daryl looked at me sideways for a quick moment and returned his eyes to the road. “You okay?” he asked dismissing my apology.
“I’ll be. I guess.”
“’S alright. You’ve just saved all of our asses, can break down all ya want.”
“Can’t believe that son of a bitch was gonna kill us all!” I finally looked up, eyes red but tears gone.
“Well, motherfucker’s dead now.”
“And so’s Jackie.”
“Her choice. Opted out, ain’t that what Jenner called it?”
I was silent for a long moment thinking about Jackie’s choice and the final, messed up, desperate minutes we had spent inside the CDC. How I had made Jenner open the door and all but told everyone on the group that I was pregnant. It was out now.
Day 64
The breaking of a twig under my foot snapped in the silence, making Morales – rifle in hand for he’d been on his guard duty for the last few hours before sunset, a few meters away into the woods from the tents area – turn around sharply, eyes wide in attention.
“Hey, just me,” I told him in a whisper, but as clearly as I could. “No walker ‘round here tonight, I hope…”
“Oh, Sam, hi… Didn’t see you coming,” he breathed relieved, a little smile showing his relief. “You’re up early.”
“Didn’t even sleep,” I told him as I stood by his side, looking out at the darkened park. “You should go, have some rest. I won’t sleep anyway if I stay in the tent, might as well do something useful.”
“Nah, you sure?”
“Sure, yeah. Go on. We have a big day coming, but sleeping now’s hopeless for me.”
“Well, if that’s alright…” he handed me the rifle with a thankful smile and turned around. “Just holler if you need something, alright?”
“Don’t worry, go to sleep.”
Morales took a couple of steps away before stopping, his back to me, looking down, and stood there for a moment. I looked back at him, confused by his gesture until he turned around, unsure expression, and took one step back towards me.
“Actually, Sam, I – I want to talk to you about something.”
Day 77
“Why do you think you and I didn’t get along?” Andrea broke the silence when we ate quietly siting on the hood of the car. It was a valid question.
“We’re just very different,” was all I answered.
“You really think so?”
“Yeah.”
“But you don’t even know my story. Just like I don’t know yours.”
“You know a bit of mine,” I told her and, when she looked confused at me, I moved on. “That night at the camp… With Amy and the wine…”
She took a breath as if hearing her sister’s name felt like a punch in the stomach. “Yeah… That part.”
“That part… That part tells a lot about me,” but I thought a bit more about it. “But it’s not… I don’t know, I always felt like you were always trying too hard. I wondered a few times why was that.”
“What did I seem to be trying too hard?”
“To be strong. To be independent, feminist, to rub in the men’s faces that you were just as good as them. You didn’t need to try that hard to show it… You already were, I could see it, but you kept trying to make it very clear to everyone.”
“I don’t know if I know how to act any other way…”
“Why’s that?”
Day 67, part 1
There was a bell. A freaky, loud church bell, sounding clearly among the trees of the eerie silent woods. It felt like we were in a scene of a trash horror movie, with a church bell sounding distant yet loud in the woods, the very same woods where Sophia was nowhere to be found. Where nearly the entire group had been wandering for what felt like hours following Daryl’s lead. Where a little hope had been found, only to be shredded again when we found it was not Sophia inside that abandoned tent.
So we ran, following the church bell as if the church itself was calling for us, tired, mumbled words saying it could be someone who’d found her, or herself, hope flagging up instantly as we ran, stopping only on the tree line where here was a small graveyard before the church could be seen.
“This can’t be it,” Shane said immediately as he looked around. “Got no steeple, no bells,” but was ignored as Rick started walking fast towards it, Daryl right by his side with me catching up immediately as well as the others followed. Shane still insisted this could not be the right place, the bells should have been coming from somewhere else. The church itself was empty but for three or four dormant walkers who woke up as soon as the opening door made a loud banging noise against the wall. I entered right after Daryl and stood with the others as I watched him along with Rick and Shane killing them all.
“Hey!” I loudly whispered. “Enough! One hit on the brain’s enough,” making Rick and Shane stop their ploughing into the already dead’s heads. We all looked around in a bit of a daze at the silent church, the others oozing in as we started looking around doors and close to the altar, weapons still ready.
“Hey, JC?” Daryl said as he looked at the cross. “You taking requests?” and then he was running out of the church faster than anybody else when the bells started sounding again somewhere absurdly close to us, only so we’d find out the bells were programmed and sounding from a sound box by the side of the church.
“It’s a timer…” he told people, disappointment dripping from his voice. “It’s on a timer…”
“Fuck,” I whispered under my breath, my hand that held a tomahawk rising to clear the sweat from my forehead.
“I’m going back inside…” we all heard Carol’s defeated voice announce and most followed her inside, Daryl and I included.
Day 62, part 2
Sunscreen was probably still needed in the apocalypse. The unforgiving sun rays did not stop burning unprotected skin only because society had come to an end. Our little only females group down at the quarry felt it clearly, burning hot skin coated in sweat. Every few minutes, one of us would splash a handful of water on our faces to refresh a little. Piles of clothing lay next to them, washed and to be washed. I had not given my clothes to the other women to laundry. I hated the idea of making them take care of my personal hygiene. I planned to do it later, alone, so nobody would even offer to help. Now, I was there with them, rifle in hand – although it had only six bullets in the magazine – guarding their left side. Close to there, a sparse patch of trees blocked any view of possible incoming walkers.
On our right and a bit behind, by the end of the dirt path that connects the camp to the water, Ed was also taking guard, smoking one cigarette after another, a ridiculously big sweat stains under his armpits, sulking and complaining in low groans about being down there under the sun.
A little bit farther, Shane was playing in the water with Carl, pretending to try and catch frogs, entertaining the child. I observed them for a moment. I knew why Shane was doing that; Carl had been worried about his dad going back to Atlanta after having only found him the day before, miraculously returning from the dead, and Shane was distracting him from worries a child should not need to have. I didn’t really like Shane very much, but this was nice of him.
Don’t Die, day 14
“Case you’re wondering where all the people are…” I mumbled quietly as Merle slowed the truck down, the road stuck with cars, until he stopped at the end of the line, more cars approaching and stopping behind us. People were out talking, looking around as if the answer would be right there on sight. Merle turned the truck off and we just sat there quietly, uncertain decisions to be taken. We were near Atlanta, but the traffic jam had extended so far that it wasn’t close enough so we could see anything or even walk there, especially with all out stuff.
After a while, we decided it would never move again – literally, never, really. – in spite of what people around us were saying. They believed in the shelter, at least most of them, and they believed nothing too bad was happening. Daryl opened the door by his side and jumped out. I followed him out with no question. As my feet hit the asphalt, I heard the driver’s door open as well and Merle groan as he stirred his muscles also getting out of the truck.
“You stay here,” Daryl told us. “Gonna check how far it goes.” He completed as he turned around, swinging his crossbow across his back and walking away.
Many long minutes later, I had been sitting quietly on the side of the truck, booted feet resting on the tire, keeping an eye on people who walked by too close to our things. The big, stylish motorcycle on the back of the truck called quite a lot of attention, especially when surrounded by full bags and, I reckoned, a dreadlocked tattooed blonde carrying a gun and a big muscled redneck snarling with a rifle in hand. When Daryl returned, as Merle smoked and observed the area around while standing in front of the truck, he informed us that it was no use to wait; if we stayed there, we’d be going nowhere.
“Let’s get the fuck outta here then.” Merle said throwing his cigarette on the ground and stomping on it. “Where to? Sam?”
Ok, wow. Merle was asking me what to do? Seriously, Merle? I looked at him and saw that Daryl was looking at me as well, both waiting for… For what? Instructions? A decision? Was I the one supposed to decide this? I said nothing, too stunned to form words but also not wanting to question this, because I always, why whole life, trusted myself to make my own moves more than anyone else. Maybe it was good they were asking me, and they were probably going to listen to me. Ok, good then, I decided. I’ll be… Leading, I guess.
I jumped out from the truck to the road and leaned inside the car to take the map out from the glove box. Still quiet, I rounded the truck to open it on the hood, both Dixons looking down at it over me shoulders. They gave their opinions, pointing down at the road on the map, mostly disagreeing with anything the other said, but I wasn’t listening. I created a Dixon-arguing-filter.
“No way to enter 675?” I asked Daryl, who had probably seen the entrance of said road on his walk.
“Nope,” Daryl answered over my shoulder.
“So we’ll turn around,” I informed them and looked at the mid section of the road, checking to see if there was space for us to drive over the grassed area. I looked down at the map again and my finger landed on a point on the map. “Take Walt Shepperds ‘til Jonesboro, then 54 to Peachtree where we can take 74 all the way to 85. We’ll try through there.”
“And if it’s another dead end?” Daryl asked as I folded the map again, a deep frown worrying my brows.
I stopped and sighed as I turned around, folded map in hand and looked from Daryl to Merle and back. “Then we’re fucked.”
* * *
“Guess we’re fucked then, that right?” Daryl asked.
“Yep.” I popped the p. “Deeply… Deeply. Fucked.”
Night had fallen. The truck stopped on the 85 traffic, cars in front and behind us stopped, motors turned off, and people all around exactly like it had been before. I opened the door and hopped down to the asphalt, looking around. Merle also left the car after me and stood by my side, pulling up his waistband.
“Gonna go take a piss.” he informed in a groan and left, just as Daryl approached.
“Should see if anyone knows anything we don’t. If maybe got some on the radio.”
“Yeah. At least one of us should stay in the car, though. Too many people, don’t want our things gone.”
Instead of an answer, Daryl offered me a cigarette, which I accepted without a second thought. He lit it up for me and I took a long, delicious drag, letting the relaxation take me for a moment. I looked at the lit ember glowing orange and felt it hit me. I shouldn’t be smoking. If the assumption I had come to the previous night was right, I shouldn’t smoke for many months to come.
“What ya doin’?” Daryl asked me when he saw me press the tip of the cigarette to the edge of the truck carefully, vanishing the ember without ruining the stick.
“I shouldn’t be –” I stopped herself. There was no way I was telling him, and also, I mean, telling him what? I wasn’t even sure, and even if I was sure, I wouldn’t be ready to talk about it. “– wasting it. I wanna save it, don’t wanna run out of ‘em. You should slow down a bit, too.”
Daryl shrugged and smoked the whole thing anyway as we stood side by side in silence, looking around. We waited for Merle to return and asked him to guard our stuff, to which he complied immediately by taking his gun out of the holster and jumping up on the bed of the truck. He sat down on the roof of the car, the gun resting on his thigh, but still pretty visible.
Nobody’s radio was working, seemed all the transmissions had been cut out completely. Daryl and I could see people were more worried now, on the edge of panic. We had wandered away for about half a mile when our attention was turned upwards to the sky, where half a dozen helicopters flew past the road towards the city. People started running to the woods, eager to see what was happening, and Daryl followed suit, his hand grabbing my wrist firmly, dragging me along without a word.
Not far from the road on the woods, Atlanta was visible from above. I could see there was no electrical light there, giving the place a gloomy atmosphere. The helicopters were just reaching the city as Daryl and I stopped there to watch, along with many other people.
There was a moment of silence, of stillness, from the far away helicopters, the city itself and the people, it seemed nobody was breathing, and then the chaos proceeded. The helicopters dropped bombs down on the streets, massive explosions with fires higher than a few buildings. It was surreal. In the few seconds before the sound of the explosions could reach us, it felt like it wasn’t really happening, like it was a scene in a very well-done movie on a very realistic screen.
Daryl’s hand was still clutching my wrist when the sound came. Deafening explosions that I could feel inside my chest, and then it was like everything else exploded along with the city. People were screaming in terror, crying, pacing around as they watched their only immediate hope fly through the air.
“Son of a bitch!” Daryl shouted, letting go of me to cradle his own head, and I woke up from my own daze of disbelief.
“No!” I guess I yelled. “Fuck, no!!”
After a long round of cursing, heart pumping painfully in my chest, I stopped, hands resting on my knees, trying to breathe and think. My wrist ached with that weird feeling in it, stronger than ever. What to do, where to go were the main questions, along with what the fuck was going on and why did they bomb the city? What about the shelter? It had to have blown up too! My mind was working fast, reaching no conclusion, and it fell once again in the possibility – quite strong possibility, I knew it – that I would have to look out for the safety of a child now, not only my own and the Dixon’s anymore. If there was no Atlanta, no shelter, no help coming from anywhere, was there any future?
Well, it was not the first time in my life I had asked myself that question. Was there a future? I had given up and resumed fighting and given up again on and on in my life, but now it felt different. This was new, this was unknown. It felt like a brand new day, and now it wasn’t just me. I wasn’t alone any longer. Right then I remember the excitement I had felt that day staring at out the window at the Dixon’s, and why I had felt it. It seemed impossible to feel that again now, with my ears still a bit deafened by the explosions that destroyed any shelter hope in Atlanta, but I understood why I had felt it. It was the end of all the crap that I had lived in my life. It was the end. It was time to start over, to fight and start over and move on.
Taking a deep breath, I straightened my back, squared me shoulders and swallowed down the lump of despair in my throat, making it disappear instantly, the fire burning from the city in the distance reflecting on my eyes.
There would be a future; I was going to make sure there would be.
I was aware of Daryl pacing around me, hands on his head, staring at the city, cursing a little more. That was it, then. We’d come all the way over here to be sure if there was or there wasn’t a chance in Atlanta, I said we had to know, whatever it was. Now we knew.
“We gotta find a quiet place.” I said firmly over the chaos and felt Daryl stop pacing by my side, even though I couldn’t see him, my eyes still trained on burning Atlanta. “Gotta make distance from the crowds. Shit will hit the fan any moment now.”
“Let’s go.” Daryl’s voice was low, but also decisive.
I hadn’t been aware of how cold I was until his warm hand touched my bare shoulder. Turning around at his motioning, I looked at two people standing close to us. A man was staring wide-eyed to Atlanta, mouth agape, and the woman was buried in his chest, clinging to him and crying desperately.
It bothered me more than it probably should, but being a woman myself I hated to see other women in distress, or in danger or being weak. I had gotten in trouble before because of that. Images of years ago came back to my mind, when I saw a friend being hit by her boyfriend and the heat rising to my face, thoughts gone as I lunged at the guy, gripping his neck and punching the side of his head. It had seemed to be working, until the guy overpowered me and I woke up at the hospital a day later, along with her friend. Seeing a woman succumb to her weakness was not as bad as seeing them being assaulted, but it bothered me anyway. Before I knew it, my feet had carried me to the couple and I was touching the woman’s shoulder, startling her and the man, who stared at me wide-eyed. I didn’t look at him, only at her.
“Pull it together, girl,” I told the woman firmly and gently at the same time. “It’s not the time for that. We gotta be strong now. Hell, we always had to be, but now more than ever. Pull it together.”
I was sure she was going to snap at me, tell me to mind my own business in the end of the world, because after a few seconds, the woman still stared at me, her brown eyes shining with tears, and the man had clutched to her even stronger now, protectively. I took a step back and turned towards Daryl, who had been standing there waiting, stunned at my action.
“Thank you,” I heard the woman say, her voice not as weak as I expected. I didn’t turn and kept stepping away. “You’re right,” she spoke again and I finally stopped and turned to see the woman standing alone, having left the man’s arms.
I smiled and nodded at her.
“Do you have any idea what to do now?” the woman asked as I had turned once more.
“Lori, I...” the man by her side started speaking, not looking at me. “I don’t think nobody knows what to do now, but I know we gotta –”
“You have to leave the crowd,” I told her what I had told Daryl. “It’s ‘bout to get ugly.”
With that I turned again, reaching an impatient Daryl who let me step in front of him to lead the way back to the road. As he followed me, we heard steps right behind him and turned to see that couple following us. The man was behind Daryl and he stared, not stopping.
“You right,” the man said. “We got a kid. Need to get outta here.”
“Ya left a kid alone on the road?” Daryl asked over his shoulder.
Daryl and I walked back towards the car, quick steps, noticing the other two were heading in the same direction. As we found Merle, still perched on the roof of the truck, I noticed the couple stopped at a car with another couple and two children, all looking positively desperate. The look on Merle’s face was not so calm either. The sarcastic smirk always present was gone.
“The fuck have ya’ll been?” he yelled at us as we arrived, now standing up by the motorcycle. “Fuckin’ shit exploded!”
“We saw it!” Daryl said angrily.
“We shoulda seen that coming! How didn’t we know?” I asked them as I rested both hands on the truck and looked down. “They bombed other big cities, I shoulda known.”
We talked in circles for a while, trying to calm down. I had to try and ignore Merle for a while, his remarks not helping at all.
“Ya said we gotta find a place.” Daryl told her. “I’m with ya, should set camp somewhere and keep an eye out for walkers and other people.”
“Especially for people,” Merle said staring fixedly down the road.
Daryl and I followed his stare to see the man from before approaching their car. Merle puffed his chest menacingly, standing with his gun. The man eyed him carefully, but stood in front of us.
“Sorry, I didn’t introduce myself,” he started. “I’m Officer Shane Walsh”.
Merle snorted aloud and Officer Shane looked at him briefly.
“Sam. This is Daryl and that’s Merle.”
Shane nodded and kept talking. “Lori and I met this other couple by our car, they also got a kid. We’re thinkin’ ‘bout leavin’ the road to find a place and set camp. You’re right when ya said we gotta leave the crowd. I’m a cop, I know how people can get.”
“We get that yer a cop, Officer.” Merle laughed.
“Don’t gotta be no cop to know how people can get.” Daryl said, crossing his arms over his chest.
“And why you tellin’ us that?” Sam asked.
“Because we need people,” Shane answered. “It’s safer in numbers. More eyes to watch out, more sets of hands to find food. And I noticed ya got weaponry,” he pointed at Daryl who had his crossbow hanging on his back and looked at Merle’s gun.
“They’re not the only ones we got,” Daryl said gravely.
“All I’m sayin’ is that if ya wanna join, we leave in the morning. We’ll be right over there.”
We watched as Shane took a few steps back before turning and heading back to his car. Daryl moved to the truck, but I stood there, watching the man retreat. He said he was a cop, and sure had the posture, but there was something else about him. Something I didn’t quite like.
“Safer in numbers,” Merle repeated from his spot above us. “That’s bullshit.”
“Why, ya don’t think it’s safer?” I asked him, finally moving from my place. I jumped over to sit on the side of the truck, legs hanging off of it.
“Ya can’t trust people,” he answered. “We better off on our own.”
“I don’t know, Merle…” I said and threw one of my legs into the truck and reached for a backpack. “Guy had a point. We know what’s out there, but we still know nothin’. I mean, we don’t know how many of those things we’ll find anywhere we go; we don’t know how many looters we’ll find either.”
“We can take care of it,” Daryl said approaching us. He threw each of us a bag of chips.
“Yeah, we can, but to a limit,” I replied, holding the bag of chips and fishing into my bag, removing a can of anchovies after a moment. “If people start grouping like this guy wants, looters will, too. Best way against a big group would be to be in a big group, as well.”
They said nothing, considering it, and we ate in silence for a moment, thinking. Mouthful of chips, Daryl restarted the discussion. “Ya right. So ya think we should go with ‘em?”
“Not sure.” I made a face. “Guy’s kinda...I don’t know.”
“Guy sniffs,” Merle clarified. “Can see it in his eyes.”
“Damn, right, that’s it,” I agreed, pointing briefly at Merle. “I knew I knew that look. But that’s not all,” I stopped to take a sip of water. “Don’t know, just don’t like him. Think I might go there and chit chat for a bit. See what I can find ‘bout the others.”
I jumped down after finishing eating and walked over to the two cars, leaving Merle and Daryl behind. Six people we gathering around the cars.
“Hi, excuse me,” I said softly as I approached and all of them looked at me.
“Uh, hi.” Shane rubbed his nose. “This is Sam. She and her friends are considering joining us to set up camp, ain’t that right?” he asked with a smile.
“Yeah, we, uh… Well, we’ve been alone, just the three of us since the beginning so, you know.”
“Where are you coming from?” the same woman I had talked to before asked. I remembered her name vaguely. Lori, I guessed.
“South. We left Savannah four days ago.”
“How was it there?” Shane asked.
“Overrun just like nearly every town we passed. Saw people still around in Macon, but it wasn’t pretty.”
“Do you...” a short haired, graying woman approached, arms crossed, voice small. She paused before starting again. “Do you know something? About what this is?”
I shook her head slowly. “I know just as much as you do… Dead people rising up, no authority know anything about it. Radio said it was virus, then bacteria, parasite, then that they had a cure, then that they hadn’t a clue…” I breathed out and crossed my arms. “And now, they bombed Atlanta, where we thought we’d find shelter, so… Yeah, I’m just as clueless as you are.”
“What about them?” Shane asked, looking pointedly at her truck a few yards away.
“What about ‘em?” I repeated, puffing my chest a little and straightening my back. Wow, talk about instincts. When the fuck had I become protective of the Dixons?
“Ain’t the friendliest kind of guys when I went over there.”
“We got things, they’re protecting it,” I explained shortly. “We scavenged and we got attacked. They ain’t friendly to any stranger who comes close. Do you blame ‘em?”
“People are not going to steal from you…” the frail-looking woman said again.
Behind her, a large man with big nose snorted, shaking his head. His wife looked back at him and visibly shrunk. Really, she literally shrunk, retracting her shoulders into herself and looking at the ground. Oh, no, here was the heat on my face again.
“What is it, Ed?” Shane asked the man.
“Women’s fuckin’ naivety gonna get us robbed. Or killed,” he said, looking around and then rested his eyes on his wife. “Do us all a favor, Carol, quit sticking your oar in.”
I watched as the woman, Carol, with cheeks pink with embarrassment, turned away from the group, going to stand with the two children. Lori looked at me just then and we exchanged a knowing look. I had to breathe and swallow down a lump of anger that rose in my chest, but I’m sure as heel I couldn’t hide the feeling from my eyes as she stared at Ed. He threw the butt of his cigarette to the floor and stomped on it, staring down at me.
“Think they’re right.” Shane moved on, ignoring what had just happened. “That’s what we gotta do, too. Lori, could ya please close the car? Our things are in there and nobody’s keeping watch.”
Lori nodded and moved to do as he said. Before reaching her car, though, she turned to look at me again and gave me one single nod, beckoning me to come along. I uncrossed her arms and followed her.
“He’s been doing it all night.” Lori said as we stood together away from the others’ ears. There was a lot of noise around us. “He’s already yelled at the girl, Sophia, and denied Carl food.”
“Ok, so, Sophia is the little girl, and Carl –”
“Carl is my son.”
“The woman is Carol?”
“Yeah. Shane is not sure if he wants Ed in the group, he told me. He knows the man’s trouble.”
“Even if it means that his wife and daughter are out, too?”
“Well, they could come with us if –”
“Ain’t no way they’re coming without Ed. Man’s got her tied to his strings,” I interrupted. “Ed is coming, but not because of him. Because of them. I ain’t leaving them behind.”
Lori looked a little confused at me, I guess digesting that I had just made a decision, but she nodded anyway, relieved. “Ok. Good.”
“Now, close the car and get back to your husband. I’ll go get you and Carl some food, okay?” I said turning to leave.
“Oh, uh…” Lori made me stop. “Shane isn’t my husband.”
“Oh?”
“No, my husband was…Well, he’s gone. Shane’s his friend, he helped us.”
“Oh. Ok. Sorry about your husband.”
As I reproached Shane, I heard the doors of the car being closed somewhere behind me. “You didn’t bring any food?” I asked the man. Shane was sitting on the driver’s seat, door open, fumbling with the radio, trying to get some station on the dial.
“No. Just packed some clothes and some camping stuff…Thought we’d be at the shelter by now.”
Ok, smart ass cop. Didn’t think of food? Come on!
“We got stuff. Food,” I said and turned to look at where Ed was still standing, listening to us. “If ya have food, too, it’s time to share, or ya outta the group,” she stated, gesturing a cut at the throat at him. He got rage in his eyes immediately. I ignored it and speaking to Shane. “We gotta ration, don’t know when we’ll come across food again. They can hunt,” I nodded towards our car, to where Shane looked quickly before returning his attention to me. “So if we find some forest or a park, it’d be the best, at least for a start.”
“That’s what I was thinking,” Shane agreed. “But we can’t move now. Gotta wait for the first light.”
“Yeah,” was I said as I left him on his seat.
I walked back to the car. On her my there, I saw two men starting a fight by one of the cars, and dodged away from them before they got physical. It was already taking too long for the fights to street. We needed to get the fuck out of here soon. Merle poked Daryl to catch his attention, showing him I was coming back.
“So, what ya say, boss?” Merle smirked.
“We got ourselves a group.” I decided firmly, ignoring his sarcasm.
“You sure about that?” Daryl rested his elbows on the side of the truck, looking at me sideways.
“Yeah, pretty sure. But I don’t like neither of the men. Shane with his weird eyes and that officer stance, and the other one, Ed, who is a sexist son of a bitch who probably beats up his wife.”
“Why you wanna stay then?” Daryl asked, his expression denouncing he thought I was out of my mind.
“We’re safer in numbers, like Officer Sniffers said. And I think any group that has children will have people willing to fight any way they can to protect them. Call that an advantage.”
“Alright.” Merle nodded. “But I ain’t gonna take orders from the cop. Not ‘bout to become nobody’s bitch.”
“Cop’s not the leader,” and hell, I was gonna make sure he wasn’t. I moved to take some food from the truck. “I’ll be damned if I let him order around. He might be useful for security stuff, though, you know, experienced in these kinda things, I’ll give him that.”
“Yeah, just gotta tell him that.” Daryl handed me a bottle of water to go with the potato chips I had in hand.
I snorted a laugh. “I’m gonna, don’t worry. You guys should go over there and meet ‘em.”
Daryl snorted rudely. “I can join the group, but I ain’t gonna make social. Forget it,” he said, walking away.
“I’ll go with ya, love.” Merle said hopping down to the asphalt by my side. “Don’t worry, I got your back.”
“Yeah, I do worry.” I reached out a hand to make him stop, and turned to him. “Listen, Merle, this is important. When you’re being, you know, yourself, with just Daryl and me, it’s alright, we can deal with it. But we’re gonna need to live together with these people for fuck knows how long, so you gonna have to pretend to be… Normal. Well, as normal as possible.”
“Sayin’ I ain’t normal, sugar?”
“Yeah.” I told him matter-of-factly. “Come on, don’t act offended, you know it’s true. You always barking and making offensive comments about everything, ain’t everybody gonna let it go. Last thing we need now is to pick a fight and have to hit the road again.”
“Nah, you listen, muffin. I ain’t gonna act like what I ain’t. I’m a man of opinion, and I ain’t scared of sayin’ it.”
“Yeah, that’s precious. You can give your opinion all you want, but give it to me. I’ll filter it and translate into something people can digest. You know how people are with feelings,” I said, rolling my eyes at the word and making a quote gesture. “And I need you, Merle. I need both you and Daryl in this group, so it will be safe. So I’ll feel safe. Come on, please?”
Damn, how things change. I didn’t even think to say it. Did I just said that I needed Merle around to feel safe? The man who scared me until two weeks ago? Well, I mean, the dead were walking on earth now, so I guess my opinion on Merle changing shouldn’t be that surprising. Weirdest thing was that I actually meant it.
Merle sniffed, looking down at me in silence for a moment, maybe as stunned as me by what I said, then rubbed his shaved head, looked around, and finally breathed out and looked at me again.
“If that’s what ya need me to do, I’ll do it. And I’ll keep an eye on those two sonabitches for ya, alright?”
“Alright,” I smiled, relieved. “Thanks, Merle.” I slapped his arm before leading the way to the rest of the group.
“Any good piece of ass over there, at least?”
“No,” I told him firmly, pointing a finger at him. “You stay away from those women.”
“Well, a man’s gotta eat!”
“Yeah, so do the dead.”
