"Just one step closer to the place my heart already lives."
☆ Listening to "Kiss me" by Sixpence None the Richer while writing this. ☆
Pairing: David Loki x fem reader (18+).
Warnings: none.
Synopsis: he invites you out to dinner with him.
Author's note: oh my god, you can't understand the crush I have for Jake Gyllenhaal in general, but with this movie he really outdid himself. I even have a collection just for him on Tik Tok hahah, anyway I hope you like it!
The reader is of legal age (I will never write for underage readers, only 18 and up).
Minors must not interact (MDNI).
If you want to make any requests, feel free to do so!
English is not my native language so I ask you to have a little tolerance :)
ෆ°ᡣ𐭩 . ° .
You find him waiting for you outside the police station, under a streetlight that emits a pale, intermittent light. His hands are in his jacket pockets and his gaze turned toward the road.
"I thought you weren’t coming," he says, without immediately turning around. You remain a step away from him. "I thought I wasn’t coming either."
Then he looks at you, finally. His eyes rest on you with that strange intensity that disarms you. It’s as if he sees things that you don’t even know you have inside, and yet you don’t feel exposed.
"Are you hungry?" he asks, and his voice is lower, slower than usual. As if he’s been thinking about this question for a long time, without finding another way to ask you. You stare at him for a moment, and you understand that it’s not a question of food, it’s an invitation. Unstated, unclear but sincere.
"Yes," you reply. "But only if it’s not a disguised interrogation." A corner of his mouth lifts, just a little. It’s not a real smile, but it’s something like it. "Not yet," he says.
The place is small, with red tables and an old song playing on a radio hanging on a nail. No one is looking at you and you sit across from him. He orders just a coffee and you get something simple.
He looks at your hands, your fingers around the glass of water. His eyes linger there, then come back up, slowly. When he meets your gaze, he doesn’t look away.
"You have a particular vibe…" he says, almost under his breath. "And I can’t tell if that’s something that attracts me or scares me." The sentence takes you by surprise. Loki isn’t one to say things like that, casually... not unintentionally.
"What if it’s both?" you reply. He lowers his gaze for a moment but then returns it to you. There’s something in his eyes that seems akin to desire. Contained, restrained but real.
"I didn’t ask you to come to dinner to distract you," he confesses. "I asked you to come because… I’ve been thinking about you… for days. More than I should."
Your heart races. Not because he caught you off guard but because he’s there, vulnerable. Naker than he thought he could allow himself to be. You reach out and place your hand on his, on the table, and he doesn’t pull it away.
"Me too," you say. "I was thinking about you." No more words are needed. The plate in front of you has gone cold, you stopped eating a while ago but you didn’t even notice. Loki plays with the knife, slowly turning it between his fingers as if he’s thinking about a question he can’t solve.
"Is it always like this?" you ask. "When you’re with someone... Do you just think about chance?" He looks up, slowly. His eyes are shiny, but not tired… rather, deep. Like a lake at dusk, holding all the cold of the night beneath the surface.
"I’m never with anyone," he says simply. The answer gets under your skin. You look down for a moment, then take a sip of water. You try to hide the fact that his words have affected you, but he sees it. He sees everything.
"Now what?" you ask. "Are you with anyone now?" A second passes, two, maybe three, and then he nods… small but firm "Yes." And he looks at you, silence.
"It’s a problem, you know?" you say, almost laughing. He raises an eyebrow. "For me or for now?" "Both." He smiles, but it’s more of a swipe of his lips... an expression that’s not his own, as if smiling was something he’s forgotten how to do, but is now trying to remember.
"You're right," he admits, then he takes a chip from your plate, dips it in ketchup with disarming slowness and eats it as if it was the most normal thing in the world. You let out a laugh, it comes out spontaneously, almost shyly.
He looks at you immediately. "What’s wrong?" "I didn’t imagine you like this…" "Like what?" "calm." Another pause with the awareness that your barriers are starting to give way and that neither of you has the desire to defend them anymore. "I didn’t imagine you like this either," he replies. "I thought you were one of those girls who really want to communicate…" "I was."
You look at each other and neither of you look away anymore. Then he takes the cup, takes a sip of the coffee they brought you, and puts it gently on the table. His fingers brush yours, it’s almost imperceptible, but you feel it. God, you feel it.
You feel like talking, asking a thousand things - about the case, about his childhood, about the tattoo under his ear - but you don’t want to ruin this small and fragile space that has been created between you, made of simple gestures.
"So," Loki says, lowering his voice, "what’s happening now?" "What’s happening is that you’re looking at me as if you want to kiss me," you answer. He doesn’t step back but he doesn’t move forward either. He stays there, balanced on the edge.
"Maybe so," he says. "But not here, not with this crappy music." And you laugh again, and he looks at you with a mixture of surprise and warmth. "So you know how to laugh," he murmurs. "That’s rare of you, you should do it more often."
You look down, but only for a moment. "Maybe you should stay closer to me, so maybe it happens more often." When you leave the diner, the air is warmer than expected, and the sky is full of clouds that don’t promise rain but seem to be holding something back, like you.
Loki holds the door open for you, in his own way - almost absentminded. You walk slowly toward the car and neither of you are in a hurry, and the night seems designed to prolong that moment, to give it space.
"So," you say, trying to break the silence full of everything, "This was your idea of a romantic dinner?" He turns to you, looks at you, then does it. That sly little smile, so genuine it makes your stomach slip and for a second you understand why that man doesn’t have to say much to make you lose your balance.
"If it was romantic," he says, his voice low, "I wouldn’t have let you finish the fries alone…" You laugh unexpectedly. "So you’re possessive about food, too?" He takes a half step closer and his gaze drops to your mouth for a moment, then comes back up, more daring.
"It depends," he says, almost in a whisper. "On who’s on the other side of the table." Your heart pounds, but you don’t pull away, you meet his gaze, still. "And now that you’ve finished your coffee and your tough jokes… what’s going on?"
He looks at you for a moment, then raises an eyebrow. "What’s happening is that I’ve been thinking about you too much for a few nights," he says, directly. "And this dinner didn’t help." The silence after is short, but dense.
You step closer and the space between you is barely a breath. "And what do you usually do when you think about someone too much?" He tilts his head, that smile, again. More pronounced this time, almost amused.
"I usually walk away." You take another half step, teasing him. "And this time?" He doesn’t answer, he just looks at you. Then he puts a light hand on your side, as if he’s checking to see if he can and you’re letting him.
"This time," he says softly, his voice hoarse, "I don’t feel like it at all." And then he kisses you. It’s not a violent kiss, but a slow one, full of all the things he hasn’t said and doesn’t know how to say yet, and you answer him with the same intensity because you both know you’re not trying to fill a void, but to build something - even if only for tonight.
When he pulls away from you, he stays close to you. "Shall I walk you home?" he asks, but he does it in a tone that leaves every possibility open. You smile, and for once you tell the truth without hiding: "Yeah, thank you." And he simply nods.
⤷ 𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘳 - 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐𝘐 (Warnings: smut. Synopsis: through the streets of the suburbs before going to your house.)
Likes, comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!
From the same series:
⤷ 𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘳 - 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐𝘐𝘐 (Warnings: heavy smut. Synopsis: a very romantic night with him.)
pairing ; david loki x reader (afab, gender-neutral pronouns)
synopsis ; nsfw alphabet + micro-drabbles for each letter.
words ; 4.0k
themes ; smut, fluff, barely-there angst, established relationship
warnings / includes ; mentions of scars, unprotected sex, mentions of bondage, oral sex, light roleplay, 'honey' as a pet name, david being exhausted </3
a/n ; been in a terrible fic-writing slump so i tried out the nsfw alphabet format for the first time! hope you all enjoy :)
main masterlist.
A — AFTERCARE
Definitely the kind to hold you close after the act, his arms firmly wrapped around your waist, his nose buried into your shoulder. David’s mostly silent, but would gladly listen and hum along if you wanted to start up any kind of pillowtalk. He just likes hearing the sound of your voice. Eventually, however, he’d get up to take a shower (he’s a creature of habit, after all), and bring you anything you needed, like a glass of water or a damp towel.
“Your hair’s wet,” you mumbled in complaint when he slipped back under the covers after his brief shower. His cold hands slipped beneath the wrinkled button-up shirt you were wearing (his, he realized a second later), and you made a disgruntled noise.
“Sorry, honey,” he replied with a soft huff of a laugh, but made no move to shift away. Instead, he pressed closer, kissing a warm spot just above your ear.
B — BODY PART
David’s favorite body part of yours would definitely be your hips. Or your eyes. Or your thighs. If you were to ask him, he’d give you a different answer every single time. There’s so much he loves about you, he can hardly pick just one. Though, he really does have a particular fondness for holding onto your hips, even in a non-sexual manner. He also loves any and all of your moles, scars, or birthmarks. Would press kisses against them because he finds them so beautiful in their uniqueness, and it makes him feel close to you. He thinks tattoos are hot as fuck on you too—especially the small ones in the most random places.
Your favorite body part on him would be his hands. He found it strange at first, how your fingers always found his, how you’d spend hours in bed simply staring at his knuckle tattoos, tracing over every inked etch and every bruise, scar, and callous. It didn’t come much of a surprise to him when he found that you liked the sight of his hand pressing down on your lower stomach as he fucked into you. It got you going—and whatever gets you going, gets him going, too.
The movie the two of you had put on was entirely forgotten. He was on the ground, knelt down in front of you, tongue tracing utter sin along your soaked cunt. And his hands—oh, his hands—one was gripping on your right thigh with iron-strength, forcing you apart to make space for his insatiable self pressing against you. The other hand was intertwined with your left palm, squeezing every once in a while, as if in reassurance. How sweet of him to hold your hand while he utterly destroyed you.
C — CUM
He’s a classic man—he likes to cum inside of you the most, but wouldn’t mind seeing it all over your tummy or over the inside of your thighs. If he was to make a mess, he would immediately clean it up with a damp towel after, asking if you were okay.
“Gonna cum inside you—that okay, honey?” he grunted right by your ear, one hand splayed over your stomach, pressing with just the right amount of pressure, and the other gripping your hip tightly.
“Yes—yes, please, David,” you moaned, breath catching at his name as you moved to lay your hands over his so you could squeeze them earnestly. “Need you to fill me up.”
Just the sound of your voice was enough to push him over the edge. He pistoned his hips against yours a few more times until he doubled over with a gruff noise, hot cum filling your throbbing pussy until it leaked out around his still semi-hard cock.
D — DIRTY SECRET
There’s a set of handcuffs in the bedside drawer just for emergencies. But David’s always wanted to ask if you’d be willing to try it out in bed. He’s not even entirely sure if he would enjoy that, since he prefers to keep his work separate from home, but the thought of you trusting him enough to keep you bound to the bed wasn’t exactly unappealing.
David could only imagine how beautiful you’d look with your wrists up above your head, cuffed to the headboard as you looked up at him with those pretty eyes of yours. How the metal would look like against your skin as you tugged and begged for him to let you touch him—
“David?” you asked with a mildly curious tone, jolting him out of his thoughts. His head turned to you, in your soft pajamas, having just brushed your teeth and washed your face. You were about to slip into bed. “You okay? What are you thinkin’ about?”
“Nothing, hon. Let’s go to sleep.”
E — EXPERIENCE
He knows what he’s doing, but he hasn’t been with a lot of people before you. Two or three one-night stands, and maybe one barely-there relationship that didn’t last very long. Before you came along, he hardly had enough time to sleep, much less concern himself with having flings. Once he met you, he was much more determined to reorganize himself so he could make time for you.
The diner was buzzing with activity that night. You were sipping on a strawberry milkshake, telling him about how you’d love to see a jaguar in person one day. He was smiling, thinking about how beautiful you were, even beneath the harsh lighting of the diner. And then—then it was all spoiled, because he caught sight of his ex in another booth. It hadn’t ended well—she left in a fit of anger and tears, frustrated that David hardly ever made time for her anymore.
Almost immediately, you noticed his change of demeanor, and reached over the table to take his hand. His tense muscles relaxed just a bit. Something you always managed to do with very little effort—it was an uncanny talent of yours.
“You wanna get out of here?” you offered. If you noticed his ex, you didn’t say anything. For that, he was grateful. “We can watch a movie at home.”
“That sounds great, actually.”
F — FAVORITE POSITION
Loki’s got a particular fondness for reverse cowgirl. Don’t get him wrong, he loves missionary and doggy too, but there’s just something about reverse cowgirl that itches him in just the right way. He likes reaching over to press down on your stomach from behind while he pounds into you, and he also likes how it’s easy access to your clit. Plus, you really enjoy hearing the gruff noises he makes right by your ear, so you’re not at all complaining.
“David!” you cried out, voice strained with ecstasy.
“I hear you, baby. Moan for me,” he muttered from behind you, sweaty chest pressed flush against your back. David glanced down and gave a guttural noise upon seeing a creamy ring of your combined arousals at the base of his cock. Another erotic sigh fell from you when he reached down to rub circles over your clit, making you keen with shocked arousal.
G — GOOFY
Very rarely would sex with David be light-hearted or humorous. The two of you are usually far too caught up in a pleasure-ridden haze. But if you happened to start laughing or smiling, he’d give you a loving half-grin before making it his mission to get you back into a moaning mess.
“That tickles,” you half-laughed when he skimmed his fingers up your sides, smiling up at him. He only barely made a humming noise before he thrust back into you—and the grin melted right off your face.
H — HAIR
He takes good care of his hygiene. Granted, he’s usually preoccupied with work to spend too much time grooming himself, but he keeps things clean down there. He also knows you’re a big fan of his slicked-back hair, so he does take the time to make himself look presentable in the morning. You’d also told him once while he was shaving that you liked how he looked with a beard—he’d really have to consider growing it out for you.
“I like how it looks,” you told him one morning before he had the chance to shave. “Your stubble. I think you’d look so hot with a beard.”
“You think so?”
“You should try it. That caveman look. It’ll suit you.”
I — INTIMACY
David can be incredibly romantic when he wants to be. Flowers and your favorite takeout are things he’d grab for you on the way back from work. He’s a detective—he studies you, observes all your likes and interests, and he’s a very fast learner to top it off. Kisses during sex are also not uncommon, and he would definitely press his lips along your neck or on your cheek, whether he’s on top or behind you. And, as mentioned before, he does hold your hand a lot. When he’s feeling more affectionate than usual, he’d murmur how good you are for him in your ear.
“You feel so good, honey. Doin’ so good for me,” he groaned, firm arms curled around your waist as he bucked his hips into you. At his praise, you arched your back so you’d press further into him, a breathless keen falling from your lips.
“Yeah?” David asked in smug approval. “You like that? You like being good for me, hm?”
J — JACK OFF
He rarely ever masturbates, because he’s got you around. And because he’s working so much. He feels as if it’s a waste of time if it’s not with you. But on the rare occasion you were out of town for longer than usual, he’d give into the temptation in the shower just once, imagining his wet fist was your warm cunt.
He missed you more than anything. All he could think about was you and your smile, your laugh, your beautiful hips and legs and thighs—
Fuck, even the cold shower he was standing under wasn’t helping his hard-on go away. With a muffled noise of frustration, David switched the water over to scalding hot, and curled a sopping hand over his throbbing cock. He leaned his forehead against the condensated tiles and closed his eyes, thinking about you and your delicious fucking moans.
K — KINK
Mentioned before, but handcuffs! He likes that you trust him enough to be at his mercy, and he also thinks you look incredibly hot tied up. Another would be when you tell him what you want him to do to you—that gets him going so good. David also loves when you tug at his hair right at the root—makes his eyes roll right to the back of his head. He also really doesn’t mind when you scratch your nails down his back. Seeing the red marks afterwards feels like an award more than anything.
It surprised him just how good it felt when your nails lightly scratched at his scalp. He peered up at you from his position (between your gorgeous thighs), tongue dragging torturously over your sensitive clit. It surprised him even more when you took fistfuls of his hair and tugged with just the right amount of pressure. He made a noise of approval right against your cunt, the vibrations making your back arch so that your cunt pressed up closer to his face.
L — LOCATION
In bed is his go-to, since the two of you would usually have sex super late at night or really early in the morning. The couch in your living room is also home to lots of impromptu sex, mostly during the weekends. The kitchen counter and the dining table aren’t exempt, either.
The stir-fry you were cooking up crackled and popped in the pan, just about ready. From behind, David’s arms wove around your waist, his nose running along the curvature of your neck. It was only when you felt his stiff hardness against your back did you halt your ministrations.
“Here?” you asked with a sweet smile, turning your head to the side so you could see his sheepish expression.
“Here’s good,” he replied, before turning the stove off for you and crowding you up against the kitchen counter.
M — MOTIVATION
Your voice gets him worked up the most. Especially when you make it go all low and you whisper right into his ear—he gets hard just from the thought of it. You could be talking about the most asinine topics, and he’s looking at you like you’re already begging him to fuck you. Whenever you wear his clothes, too—preferably with nothing underneath—it just makes you all the more irresistible to him.
It was rare for the both of you to wake up lazy, with no plans for the rest of the day. But today—today was a miraculous weekend where both of your off-days lined up. And so that only meant you got to lounge around wearing David’s shirt, whispering pure filth into his ear so he’d push you up against the closest surface and fuck you with no abandon. It was simply heaven.
N — NO
Anything that could potentially really hurt you. He’s alright with a little bit of spanking here and there, but slapping you across the face is a hard no from him. He already sees quite a bit of abuse and violence at work, the last thing he’d want to do is replicate that with you. David can call you dirty names if you’d like, too, but he’s not very keen on being on the receiving end of it. Reminds him of his military school days. And, if it wasn’t obvious, none of the typical “gross” kinks, like piss and shit. He’s not into that at all.
“Before we do this,” David started, trying his best to quell his racing heart, despite the fact that he’s slept with you three times prior to this. It was all still so new to him. “I just wanted to make sure—you’ll let me know if you’re uncomfortable, right? Or if I hurt you in any way, okay? I need to know if you’re not… enjoying it.”
“Okay, David,” you said with a serious nod, wrapping your legs about his waist. “I promise I’ll let you know.”
O — ORAL
Loves giving and receiving equally. On days where he’s come from work utterly exhausted and too tired to fuck you, he’d have you hanging right by the edge of the bed, where he’s kneeling on the ground, licking lazy patterns up and down your aching core. Eating you out also makes for brilliant foreplay—David likes to tease it out, and he especially likes the way you tug at his hair and groan out his name. As for receiving, he loves to pull your hair just as much, low moans of appreciation falling from his lips.
It was heaven between your legs, he thought, brows knitting together as he hiked your thighs up higher on his shoulders so he could properly bury his face into you sopping pussy. The noises you were making were going straight to his cock, which ached within the confines of his trousers. Even when you’d come twice from his tongue, David just kept going, humming in amusement when you began to whine with overstimulation.
P — PACE
It really depends on the day. Sometimes he wants to burn off some steam and frustration—goes all rough and quick until both of you are seeing stars. Other days he takes it slow, drawing it out to savor it as long as he can, drenching the sheets with both sweat and cum.
“David—David, honey,” you cried out into the mattress, fists curling against the sheets. His cock was hitting all the right places inside of you, so fucking deep. “Please, please, go faster.”
He let out a guttural noise when you tightened around him. “No, no, honey… I’m taking my time with you today. Wanna make you feel every inch of me.”
Q — QUICKIE
Much to his chagrin, the weekdays usually leave him no other choice than a quickie. He’d certainly prefer it if he had the option to take his time with you, but David makes the most out of it regardless. You certainly don’t seem to mind—though, you’ve convinced him to come in late to work a handful of times.
“I’m gonna be late for work,” David grunted right into your mouth as he pounded into you. The squelching sound of his cock hammering into your throbbing cunt was enough to leave his cheeks warm and flushed. “It’ll be all your fault, honey.”
You clutched onto his shoulders, your forehead drooping down onto his cheek, far too delirious to come up with a coherent response.
R — RISK
He’d be more than willing to try out new things with you. He’s especially a big fan of when you come to him proposing a new position to try out. However, David isn’t likely to try out anything new on his own, so it’s all up to you. He’s just happy to do whatever you want to do.
“Hey, David?”
Your boyfriend glanced up from the paper he was reading, brows quirked.
“Well, uhm,” you wrung your hands together, with a sheepish expression, “I was wondering if we could… try something out in bed tonight.”
David blinked once, twice, and a third time. He put the paper down. “Of course, hon,” he said, a soft smile playing at the corner of his lips, “We can do whatever you want.”
S — STAMINA
Usually only one or two rounds since he’s already so worn out from his job but you can easily work him up into a third round if you really wanted to. The rounds can last pretty long, though—he’s good at pacing himself and also makes sure that you’re feeling good, too.
“Again?” he panted with a tired grin when you rolled him over so you could clamber onto his lap, grinding your slickened cunt against his spent cock.
“Mhm,” you replied, nodding. Your hair was a complete mess—David took pride in being the reason you looked so sexily disheveled. “You don’t even have to do anything. Just—lay there and let me take care of you.”
“Can’t argue with that.” David’s muttered words tapered off into a low groan when you sank down onto him.
T — TOY
He wouldn’t own any toys of his own but if you owned a vibrator he’d definitely tease you with it during foreplay. Not at all the kind to be insecure about you using toys—in fact, he’s glad you have a way to feel good on your own whenever he’s not around to take care of you. Independence is incredibly sexy to him, after all.
The gentle buzz of the vibrator against your clit made you buck your hips up, to which David only let out an amused hum of laughter. One of his hands pressed down on the expanse of your stomach to keep you pinned down onto the bed.
“Stop squirming around, honey,” he muttered, teeth nipping at the inside of your thigh. “Relax—let me make you feel good.”
U — UNFAIR
David can be a huge tease if he wanted to be—he knows the exact buttons to press to work you up until you’re right there, but he’d pull away just before you could cum. Would have a wide, smug grin on his face, but he’s quick to cave once you start moaning out his name.
“Why’d you stop?” you huffed, breathless, propping yourself halfway-up with your elbows so you could look down at him. The lower half of his face was covered with your arousal.
“Hm?” The faux noise of confusion aggravated you to no return. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He shot you a cocky smile, before kissing up your stomach.
V — VOLUME
He’s not very loud, mostly quiet grunts and the occasional murmur against your skin. He’d much rather hear you—he loves it when you cry out for him, and tell him how good he feels against you.
Your nails dug into his shoulders as he plowed into you—you could feel the vibrations of his breathless groans and choked grunts. With a particularly hard thrust, your pussy walls shuddered and clenched around him, the lewd cry you let out enough to etch a permanent blush over David’s cheeks.
W — WILD CARD
Roleplay wouldn’t even be something he thinks of doing but if you brought it up, he’d find it so incredibly hot if he pretended he was arresting you before bending you over a table and fucking you senseless.
“You gonna punish me, detective?” you asked with a coy smile, hand trailing down his chest, toying with the buckles of his belt.
David blinked at you—trying his best not to break character. With firm hands, he yanked your fingers away from his belt and twisted your arm around over your back, crowding you against the table. “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and may be used against you in a court of law.”
It took all it had in him not to laugh when you let out an aroused moan.
X — X-RAY
Size really doesn’t matter because he knows how to pleasure you regardless, but he’s definitely quite girthy. The first few times he had sex with you, he’d take it slow because he really didn’t want to hurt you and he was stretching you out so good.
“You’re so big,” you whispered as he carefully eased you onto his cock, hands gripping your hips tight. “Was worried you wouldn’t fit when we first had sex.”
David let out something akin to a hiss and a groan, his forehead leaning against yours.
Y — YEARNING
David’s sex drive isn’t all that high. It was mentioned before that you could work him up most of the time if you wanted to but unprompted, David would be just fine with having sex around once a week, especially since the two of you are so busy with work and quite tired when off it.
“We haven’t had sex in a while,” he whispered as he clambered into bed.
You muffled a yawn behind a fist. “Do you want to now?”
David rubbed at the corner of his eye, also fighting back a yawn. “I’m exhausted.”
“Me too.” The two of you laid down beneath the comforter, curling into your favorite positions like magnets snapping together. “In the morning, then?”
“Sounds good to me,” he replied, planting a chaste kiss on your shoulder and watching your eyelids slide shut.
Z — ZZZ
Sleep is hard to come by for David, so he’s usually up for a while after sex. Just holding you, listening to you breathe, his nose pressed against your shoulder. He likes watching you sleep—not in a weird, creepy way, obviously, but he just likes how peaceful and restful you look. He finds that he sleeps much better with you around. Still doesn’t get enough hours, but it’s much more restful compared to his nights without you.
You collapsed into the mattress face-first with a satisfied noise, which was muffled into your pillow. Sweat glistened on both of your bodies, but neither of you had the energy to go wash up before bed. David’s eyes darted down to your legs, suppressing a grin when he saw his spend smeared between your thighs.
“You’re too good, David,” you muttered, having turned your face away from the pillow, shooting him a lazy, blissed-out smile.
Funny, he thought you were too good for him. His arms curled around you. “G’night, hon.”
Summary: David Loki processes his feelings through cooking. What happens when you’re woken up to the promise of a delicious dish and a boyfriend carrying something heavy on his heart.
Warnings: Just some fluff, a bit of angst because it's cold, so cold surprisingly where I’m at and I like a fluffy fic to warm up my insides. Also curse words. And if you squint some sexual innuendos (I mean you don’t need to squint but this is PG13 so you’ll be fine)
Still, this account is for 18+ so leave if you are not
A/N: Here’s a little Detective Loki fluff piece, with him winning as our lead for this one shot I've been sitting on. The more I write David, the more I fall in love with the idea that he would be into these little things with his lover, these glimpses that he hides from the world and I la, la love it I need him to be real and to be mine lol
Also sorry if there’s typos I’m tired and I’m trying lol
Tags are open | Header made by me
_
It’s the smell of cured meat that lures you from the deep sleep that you were in.
You groan as you haphazardly feel around for your phone, forgetting you were in David’s bed, not yours, so it takes longer for you to realize that your phone isn’t on the left nightstand, it's on the right one, your side at his place.
You pull the little glass device to your face, clocking the time.
3:45 a.m.
You groan as you fall back into your pillow face first, phone temporarily forgotten in your hand as your brain tries to lull you back to sleep.
Something caramelized starts to mingle with the savory scent and your stomach rumbles, trying to jar you awake.
Then it hits you.
You’re not in your little apartment in downtown Philly. Even if you were, the Greek restaurant that you lived above has never cooked anything as delicious smelling as this. I mean, that wasn’t true, it's just how you felt in the moment, sleep slipping in and out of your brain. Even if they did open for breakfast, the smell wouldn’t hit your nostrils until at least another two hours.
You were in your boyfriend's apartment, he did not live above a restaurant so this smell was coming from within.
Which meant he was home.
This realization has you snapping up, senses suddenly heightened. It's dark in the room, you’ve used the black out curtains he hung up for you a while back so no other light source leaks in, minus a small sliver from under a crack in the bedroom door.
You move to swing your legs out of bed, cracking your neck before placing them on the cool hardwood. It was winter and despite the warmth the heater provides, it still couldn’t counter the cool feel the worn wood holds onto.
It’s welcomed.
You walk to the door blindly, cracking it open slowly as more light greets you.
It's jarring, the contrast of light and dark, and it takes a minute for your eyes to adjust.
When they do the smells overwhelm you, the soft sound of chopping and low music, a soft sizzle.
You softly pad your way to the kitchen, anticipating what you’ll be greeted with.
David’s jacket is thrown over the couch. His gun and badge are placed carefully on the coffee table, within reach always, his shoes tossed haphazardly underneath. His phone hangs out on the counter, the source of music, a jazz song playing faintly.
His back is to you, he’s humming softly to himself as he flips something in the pan, you think the sweet caramelized onion scent you pegged earlier.
You can’t help the small smile that instantly comes to your face and you lean against a wall, drinking him in. Beyond pieces of hair that softly sweep over his eyes, he was relaxed, looked absolutely adorable and at peace in this moment.
Loving David was easy.
Simple.
New.
Fresh.
It was going on ten months, David had given you a set of his apartment keys, liking how you were slowly encroaching into his home.
Your toothbrush next to his.
You’re makeup, haphazardly thrown on the counter.
The soft throw blanket he liked to throw over the both of you while you cuddled and watched TV.
Your clothes slowly starting to eat up his closet space.
He wanted the space to feel as much as home to you as you were to him.
You both had yet to tell each other that big word, starting with ‘L’ and ending with ‘E’. You danced around it, hinted, teased, but never said those eight letters, three words.
Yet you knew it as you gazed at him now, watching as he peacefully cooked who knows what and for what reason this early in the morning.
You loved that he was thoughtful, kind, and reflective. You loved his touches and the way he made you feel like the most beautiful person in the world with just a look. You liked that he’d indulge you, even when he was exhausted, and that he trusted you enough to share pieces of his broken past, that he trusted you with his heart.
You loved David.
You also loved how much he had clung onto cooking. Before you started dating, David knew how to burn ramen effectively.
Now he was sending you recipes that you both could cook together and apparently, when you weren’t around, he was cooking on his own.
You were glad, it felt like a good outlet for him, cooking. A way to distract his busy brain, to work through the heavy weight of his job.
You know you should alert him that you were here, greet him, he hadn’t been home for days only talking to you through random texts, but you didn’t want to disrupt his peace.
So you move to the couch, grabbing a blanket to sit back and watch him. Capture it so you can cling onto it when he is gone again.
David’s anxious, has been for most of the day. The case he was on had been solved, this time it wasn’t a bleak and tragic closure, so he had spent most of his time at the station wrapping up reports.
Thinking, reflecting.
He wants to ask you to move in.
He knows that technically you were as close to moved in as one could observe. You spent more time at his place than you did your downtown loft in Philly, but it wasn’t official. You weren’t on the lease, hadn’t infiltrated his space with the eclectic taste he’d come to prefer. You were always driving back and forth from Conyers to the city to check on your cat, Chestnut, and he felt guilty that you were going back and forth constantly, that Chestnut missed you. So much so that he had worked for two months to adjust to having a feline, getting to know him, and now he missed the little brown and black Tabby as much as you did.
Yeah, Chestnut could move in too.
Also, he knew with the work that you did that living in Philly was more convenient. You were a photographer, one that was popular enough to have work both throughout Philadelphia and New York, and moving to Conyers would mean that your commuting time would be permanently longer. He’d offer to move into your place, he would, except he was a detective here and until PSP picked him up it didn’t make sense to transfer.
He felt selfish, he felt he would be implying his career was more important than yours. Really, you were just in a job that was less rigid and more flexible, and you had told him that driving and commuting to far away places was just part of the description.
That was all, with that knowledge his place was just the most logical solution.
The both of you made sense together. Between how much both your jobs demanded, moving in felt like the next best thing to ensure the stability of the relationship.
All of this was weighing on his mind on the drive home, so he decided he’d make a quiche, something that you could enjoy when you woke up and the recipe that you had sent him days earlier looked easy enough.
He’d make a quiche and allow his brain to take a break.
Except he forgot that like him, you were a light sleeper. When he hears the shutter of a camera click, he’s not surprised to turn around and be greeted by you.
You're wearing one of his shirts, he loved when you wore his clothes, the oversized Conyers Police Department text faded as it hung loosely over your frame. You were sitting comfortably on the couch, hair messy from waking up from the deep sleep he saw you in when he got home, thighs exposed and because the only lighting was coming from his small kitchen, hiding the secret between your legs.
A camera was steady in your hands, he felt like you always had one, and you pull away from the lens to give him a soft smile.
God, he loved you.
He loved you so much it hurt.
He loved your smile, the way you would giggle before erupting into laughter. He liked the dedication to your craft, the eye you had when viewing the world. That you could be equal parts sweet and sarcastic, patient, tender. He loved the way you looked when you came and that he always felt like the center of your world, even when he was gone for days on end.
He was afraid to tell you though, afraid that if he said the words out loud he would lose you.
So he kept them in, safe and close to his heart, just like the thought of you when you weren’t around.
But it was there.
“Good morning handsome.” Your voice is cracked, low but the weight of care wraps around him as he moves the onions off the burner, moving to check the pie crust in the oven. One of them is ready, so he pulls it out before saying,
“Good morning, beautiful. You should be asleep.”
“I should be asleep?” your voice is teasing as he flickers his eyes towards you, nods.
“Yes. It's almost 4 a.m. What are you doing up so early, don’t you have work in a few hours?”
His voice is light, teasing even if his face stays straight and you giggle as you place the camera down, shrug,
“Meh. They cancelled the shoot I was going to do so figured I’d get up and bother my boyfriend. You might know him. Tall, dark, and handsome with the most beautiful blue eyes and a great ass.”
He smiles to himself, shaking his head as he moves to start chopping broccoli.
“I might’ve heard of him.”
“Figured as much,” you lean further back, reaching for the camera because you needed something to fidget with, something to keep your hands busy, “Seriously though, how are you? Haven’t seen you for a few days.”
He pauses from chopping, sighs,
“Sorry about that. I just…I was-”
“Don’t apologize David, I don’t need one remember. I understand that you were working,” a pause, “But you’re avoiding the question. How are you? Is everything okay?”
He resumes his chopping, moving faster as his eyes furrow together. Grateful that his back was to you. That he could try to hide the truth from you.
“Oh, I’m fine. The case was….we wrapped it up with no casualties. I just had paper work and then came home and wasn’t tired so I decided I’d surprise you with a quiche.”
You knew David, had learned to pick up on his personal cues, understand his little mannerisms. It was easier for you, for him, he struggled to articulate himself and this helped meet him halfway.
.
When his eyes would blink in a series of tics, typically in sets of three or four, he was deep in thought, usually trying to sort out how to articulate a problem he had yet to answer. Ingesting and processing.
When he twirled the freemason ring on his pinkie, he was anxious and needed a place to put his energy, something to occupy his hands while he occupied his mind.
When he was tense his shoulders squared up, hard and unforgiving, like they were now. Something was on his mind.
Something was on his mind and it was going to be a bitch to pull out.
Not because he didn’t like to share. Because it was personal, and you knew he’d either feel comfortable to share with you over time or choose to hold it in. You didn’t care either way, you just wanted to help ease the weight however he needed.
You move off of the couch, placing the camera down for good and move towards him. The closer you get, the more you smell the scent of his cologne, the even stronger scent of coffee that lingeried on him and it makes you feel safe.
You wrap your arms around him, hands tugging him to you as you rest your face into his back.
Yeah, he was stressed.
“What’s wrong?” you mumble into his clothed back and he tenses up more and says low,
“Nothing.”
“You're the worst liar D.”
“No I’m not. I’m telling you the truth.”
“Uh huh, right.”
You move so that you can shift to the island, hopping on it as you avoid the variety of ingredients.
He stops chopping, missing your touch, your presence, and turns around as you beckon him with your finger.
“Come here.”
He blinks, a succession of five, and you know there’s something heavy on his mind.
“Baby, please come here.” you ask him again more tenderly, lower and he exhales as he puts the knife down, wipes the flying broccoli florets from his hands.
He moves to you and you’re at his eye level from this angle, he watches you carefully as you move your hands up to his shoulders, digging into the tough muscle.
The moan he lets out reverberates within him, trickles out to your fingers and he falls into your neck, hands wrapping around your waist as he exhales,
“That’s nice.”
“I bet. You’re holding so much tension.”
He grunts, breath tickling your neck and you smile as you work through his shoulders, around his neck, resisting kissing his neck tattoo because if you did that you know he’d move to shifting the tone to something sexual.
While you would love for him to fuck your brains out on his kitchen counter, that isn’t what he needed right now.
“What’s on your mind?” you finally ask, your voice faint and he sighs as he mumbles,
“It's nothing.”
“It must be something if you’re holding this much tension on a case that seemed pretty mild compared to what you’re usually working.”
“I-” he hesitates, pauses. You continue to work his shoulder, slightly humming, letting him take his time.
“I’m unsure how to ask.”
“Just say it. Say it messy. Say it bad. But just say it. You know I won’t judge you.”
“I’m worried you’ll say no.”
You try not to stop your ministrations on him, a smile creeping on your face as you wrap your thighs around him to pull him closer,
“Tell me and we can see what I say. If it's no, we can talk through it.”
He sighs deeper, before mumbling something that you can’t hear and you frown.
“What? I can’t hear you when you're mumbling so low.”
Another pause.
“I want you to move in with me.”
That gets you to stop, and he freezes, breath heavy on your collarbone as his hands grip you. You can feel his heart beating fast, hard, and you try to process the words.
He wanted you to move in?
David has always felt like a…..not a free bird per say but something akin to it, something you couldn’t cage. He liked his freedom. He liked his independence. You even felt like the time you did spend around him was probably too much for him, the amount of random things you texted him in a day.
He never said anything or complained, you just assumed it did because of the way he operated. You respected it, understood why, you knew about his tough childhood. He was attentive in his own way so it was fine, you never felt neglected.
David kept people at a distance. It’s how he protected himself.
But he wanted you to move in?
“You do?”
“Yes.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“Oh wow,” you pause as you roll it through your brain. Technically, your lease was coming up in three months and you were debating renewing or finding a new place. This would solve that. You could bring Chestnut and you didn’t mind commuting, that was just life as a photographer on the east coast. Most importantly, you’d have access to David all the time, well, at least when he wasn’t deep in a case.
The promise of that made the answer easy.
“Okay, yeah sure. Let’s do it.”
His breath hitches, he grips your waist tighter, before he lets out,
“Really?”
This time you move to pull his face towards you, caging it in your hands as you whisper,
“Yeah.”
“....why?”
He knew that he wanted you to say yes, that he shouldn’t question it, but also he was shocked at how quickly you answered.
He wanted to make sure it was for the right reason, not because he was having a mild panic attack.
You look into David’s eyes, ocean orbs that say so much more than he would ever communicate directly to you. Tenderness wrapped up in something deeper, something that you’ve felt in his touch, the way he left little gifts for you, the way he held you.
Fuck it. No need to hold out any longer. Might as well tell him first.
“Because I love you and I love when I’m here, the routine we have.”
David’s breath hitches again, you’re worried you might have killed me, that he might actually have a panic attack and you sigh as you rub your hands over his jaw, your skin melting into his scratchy shadow.
He doesn’t say anything, just watches you and now you feel like you're going to have a panic attack.
“Say something.”
He blinks once, twice.
“You do?”
“Yes,” a pause, “But that's no reason for you to feel pressured to say it back. You just asked why I wanted to move in and I’m giving you a reason.”
“I want you to move in because I love you too.”
He says it low and quick, so quick you think you’ve misheard him. Except he’s still looking at you in that same way he had been before the words fell out of his mouth, and you pull him closer as you wrap your arms around your neck.
“Yeah?”
“Yes. I….I was hoping to….I probably should have told you while doing something more romantic. Been meaning too for weeks. Just been…afraid.”
“I get that, me too. Also, what’s not romantic about your boyfriend waking you up at four in the morning to make you quiche and tell you he wants you to move in because he loves you?”
“....the shit timing of it?”
“I’m a photographer, you learn to work with shit timing.”
You offer him a small smile that he reciprocates, eyes flickering to your mouth. It only takes a second before he’s ducking down to kiss you and you sigh, missing his lips, missing the way it felt to be claimed by him.
You loved him. He feels like he’s jumped off a cliff, plunging into nothingness only to fall into water, swallowed around safety. He allows you to lead the kiss, allows your tongue to softly dance with his, tender and slow, needy and loving.
When you both pull away he rests his forehead against yours as you mumble,
“You know that means Chestnut is moving in too.”
“Oh I know. The Three Amigos.”
You smile at the nickname he had dubbed the three of you, still holding him tight.
“He’ll jump on your shoulders while you cook and get hair all over your clothes.”
“I know. We talked about it. I’m willing to meet his terms as long as he keeps to mine. He stays an indoor cat.”
It wasn’t fair how much he loved you, to the point that he understood how important it was that Chestnut never left the house again. A few months back, the tabby had snuck out and disappeared for three weeks. David had stayed with you every night, always doing a sweep of the neighborhood before coming in to console you.
When you had finally cried yourself to sleep accepting your best buddy was gone for good, he had decided to come out of hiding and confront David as David walked to the door of your place. David was going out to look for him, one last time, and Chestnut had nuzzled his legs like he had been gone an hour. That was the last time the tabby smelled fresh air from outside your loft.
You smile as you squeeze him closer to you. You loved him and he was all yours. You keep this in mind as you say seductively,
“Baby can I ask you something?”
“Yeah?” he moves your hand to your exposed thigh, fingers caressing up to the hem of your shirt, liking the low tone of your voice, knowing what you were most likely going to ask.
It pains you to say the next words, the idea of fucking on his island was appealing. It was the one place he had yet to claim you on in his space, but fate had other plans.
“Did you have two pie crusts in the oven? Because something is smoking at a crazy high level.”
“Oh shit!” David snaps away from you, pulling the oven open and yanking out the now very burnt pie crust.
You laugh as he curses, moving quickly to open the window before the smoke detector starts to go off.
Oh yeah.
Moving in with David was going to be the best thing you ever do in your life.
_________
All work was written originally by me, please do no repost or use as your own
Summary: David Loki has made peace with the knowledge that he will traverse the world alone. Except, what happens when a run in with a stranger at a wedding turns his world upside down, causing him to question everything he thinks he wants and needs for himself? Even more so, what does he do when the same woman's life suddenly is in jeopardy.
Warnings: cursing, flirting, sexual innuendos, self deprecation
A/N: Buckle in boys and girls, this one is going to be long. I’m so sorry. Writing dialogue is tough on words and page count but it's the best way to capture people falling for each other. And I like capturing David's banter. I personally believe he’d talk more if he felt comfortable around you, especially if it's 1:1.
Tags are open | Header made by me
-✦-
Chapter 8: I’ll Be Seeing You
“Loki, do you have a minute?”
The combination of those words always causes David’s eyes to blink in a succession of three, triggering him in a way that makes him crave whiskey. Usually because it was weighted, the words really translating to ‘Loki, I need you to fix another problem’ without any acknowledgement of how he was doing.
He should be used to it by now but still, it got to him.
It was a Monday evening and like usual David was one of the few people who still didn’t need to be at the station, in his cubicle.
Yet here he was.
He had wrapped up the case with the little girl a day earlier, an investigation that had stolen his sanity for two weeks. Today the focus was to tie up loose ends, work on closing paperwork in between reviewing smaller cases - a standard administrative day.
Except O’Malley was standing at the edge of his desk, no jacket or briefcase in hand, so either David was fired or he was about to get dumped another case.
More likely it was the latter.
David nods and O’Malley turns, signaling for him to follow. David does, taking the short walk to his bosses office and shutting the door as the older man takes a seat.
“That was a great job with this last case. The mayor is impressed by how thorough it was. How it was handled. Quickly and efficiently with mindfulness for the family. Professional.”
David gives a curt nod as O’Malley continues,
“Lots of people are looking at us. Want to push a few more dollars in the city budget our way. You continue to make us look good.”
David shifts his hands to his hips, right hand naturally resting on his gun, the other on his belt loop, right by his extra clip. He appreciates the acknowledgement for a job well done, but he genuinely doesn’t know what else to say. It was his job. He was just doing his job.
He was just grateful his job helped people get justice.
O’Malley sighs,
“Loki, you gotta start cutting back on hours.”
“What?”
That wasn’t what David was expecting to hear. O’Malley continues,
“We’ve been audited. You work the most hours of any cop, detective in this station.”
“That’s the nature of the job.”
“I know. I told them that. Except, most detectives take breaks between cases. A little R&R. You….don’t.”
“Okay.”
“They want you to actually start using your weekends.”
David blinks once, twice, three times. O’Malley sighs,
“Your overtime is out of this world. They're fine to pay you but they want you to rest.”
O’Malley emphasizes that word again, rest. David looks over it.
“Don’t pay me overtime then.”
“Loki, that's not the point,” O’Malley starts to drum his fingers on his desk, “ A year ago, you were responsible for a man shooting himself in the head. Since then, you’ve worked and solved sixteen cases. Sixteen David. Most people, most departments solve that in two years. You’ve done it in one.”
“I’m getting punished for being too fucking good at my job? If that’s the case, I’m happy to find another place who’ll fucking appreciate the way I operate.”
He jumps over the fact that Bob Taylor had shot himself with an officer's gun, in the station, on his watch. That still haunted him. He was very aware of how poorly he had handled that situation. Didn’t need the reminder.
It was why he also knew that O’Malley would see through his bluff, even if the man’s eyes were popping out of his head. The only reason Philadelphia State Police hadn’t recruited him, as far as he knew, was because they were still wavering on whether he could rein in his “anger” issue. So he could lose his shit sometimes, so what.
They don’t see or deal with the shit he has too on a daily basis.
O’Malley shakes his head.
“No, no. Loki, fuck relax. People like you. They respect you. They are…worried about your well being. Self care and mental health and all that. They want you to take the rest of the week off and actually start taking your weekends if you’re not doing high profile cases.”
Shit. People thought he was a fucking head case. Sure, he worked too much. Sure, he could probably benefit from taking time off. Maybe, even maybe, he could benefit from some therapy.
This was just his normal now. He didn’t have family, minus Edward. Didn’t really have any friends beyond the people he worked with, for whatever that was worth. What was he supposed to do?
He wanted to help people.
He needed to help people.
He cuts to it,
“Am I on leave?”
“No!” O’Malley jumps up from his seat, shaking his head. “You’re just valuable. We don’t want burnout. It's either this or you’ll have to start seeing someone to help with the weight of it all. And you’d still have to take your weekends.”
David gives a deep sigh, moving to drag a hand over his face before looking back at his boss, a series of ticks overwhelming him.
“So I gotta start taking time off.”
A statement, not a question.
“Two days. They might alternate throughout the week but you gotta take them through. Nothing about work. And you gotta take the rest of the week off.”
“Fuck. Fine.”
“Don’t worry about the Sherry paperwork. Head home. Rest. When’s the last time you got a full night's sleep? Take the week and I’ll see you when you return.”
“Fine. Anything else?”
“No.”
David nods, sighing and moving out of the office.
What kinda fucked up world punishes you for doing your job well?
What was he supposed to do?
The first day he tries to sleep, he really does. He’s triggered, conscious that people want him to take time off to relax, interfering with his career. If he burnt himself out who the fuck were they to tell him what to do about that?
Why did they care?
He goes to the gym, the first time he’s gone in the middle of the day in…..years. He runs eight miles on the treadmill and spends an hour on the weights. He grabs Chinese at his favorite restaurant before heading home and showering.
He doesn’t know what to do.
His apartment is stark, bare. He’s lived here for five years now but he still has three boxes full of books from when he moved in, picture frames with his degree and other awards that haven’t been hung, an unbuilt book shelf in the living room. He could probably do with a TV stand too, now that he thought about it, even if he rarely used his TV.
He grabs his keys, goes back out. Ends up buying night stands too, because why the fuck not? He adds a lamp to the mix, just for fun.
He spends the rest of the day building furniture and placing books on shelves, reorganizing his place.
On day two, Wednesday, he wakes up before his alarm goes off at four a.m. Lies in bed for an hour staring at the dark ceiling before he decides to do something. Moves to the kitchen, realizes he has no coffee machine let alone coffee and sighs. Opts to go to the gym instead.
That way, at least, he can get coffee.
He spends three hours at the gym. Runs even further than the day before, eleven miles, a new personal record. He ignores the way people eye him, drinking in his appearance. Decides to walk to the cafe that's a few businesses down from where his gym is at, take advantage of the overcast day. The light rain falling from the sky.
It's when he’s walking back to his car that he notices it. Doesn't know how long it's been stuck to the bottom of his shoe, how long he’s been tracking it with him. The hue of blush, contrasting against black asphalt, wet and weathered. It's a ribbon, it's fringing at the edges and it automatically makes him think of hazel eyes, a warm smile.
Nina.
Holy shit. He never texted her.
He fumbles for his phone, moving quickly to dip into his car as the rain picks up. Doesn’t bother to turn it on as he finds her number, clicks to send a message. He sees their last message, written two weeks ago and he groans.
He really was the fucking worse when it came to dating. It couldn’t be helped. His job was crazy. It took priority.
Except, now he had time.
All the time in the fucking world.
David: Hi, sorry I went awol. I was deep in the case. But it's over so I’m reaching out. How are you?
David stares back at his phone, probably far longer than he cares to admit, willing for a response. He gets none.
He flicks his eyes to the time, it's 10 a.m. She was probably working, at class, whatever the right language was. Most people did that on weekdays, worked. He was the one forced into exile.
He sighs, moving to turn on his car.
He hated being off.
When he gets back to his apartment, it's 5 p.m. He’s still in his gym clothes, but he has a bag with a new coffee pot and a few groceries. He decided after he forced himself to go to a movie (which was a nightmare, he fell asleep during the second half), that he should probably not eat out as much as he had been. He bought what he had learned worked well for him, a variety of mostly frozen dinners from Trader Joes and other staple items, something to make his very empty fridge look lived in. He moves to put them away, before jumping into the shower.
He changes into sweats and a simple shirt, deciding he should make something to eat when his phone goes off. He’s so trained in thinking it's work, not used to communicating with anyone outside of his job, that he nearly drops his device when he sees that Nina has texted him back.
Nina: Mon dieu he lives! Welcome back to the living David 😊 I’m good, I just got home
Nina: Driving in this state sucks ass
David can’t help the small smile that falls on his face as he moves to the kitchen, turns on his stove.
David: I am indeed alive. The Conyers to Philadelphia drive is tough on a good day. Glad you survived it.
David: How was your day?
He watches three bubbles pop up before a response,
Nina: It's almost as bad as Paris traffic! Except there's no train to save you.
Nina: I am good! It was a good day of dancing. Had an ice plunge. My body is mad at me after what I put it through these past few days.
David remembers her speaking about a gala, dancing a few shows so he inquires more.
David: How did the gala go? What is a gala? You said you had shows, how did the shows go?
Nina: Whoa slow down cowboy! Ha ha the gala was really nice. A gala is a gala, it was a little party to announce me to the Philadelphia elite stating that I am the new principal ballerina. To be honest it was really stuffy but I got to wear a pretty dress and the food was good. And my dad was my date so that was nice to get him out of the house 😀
Nina: I do have shows. I’m dancing Sylvia right now. It's a love story about a nymph and a shepherd. Also two contemporary pieces that have been fun
David: I never went to prom so the idea of a gala is beyond me. Sylvia sounds interesting. Glad you're enjoying dancing your shows
He hesitates and then sends a smiley face. It gave him the ick, but he wanted her to know that he was happy for her.
Nina: Thank you! Also we will need to address that prom comment….soon. But how are you doing? Taking care of yourself? Did you on the off chance finish watching Arcane 👀
David: I’m okay. I think. I was basically told by my boss that I work too much and I need to rest so they forced me to have the week off. And I actually have to start taking my weekends
David: You already know that I didn’t watch Arcane
He grabs his frozen dinner, opens the packaging to throw in the oven.
Nina: David….you never took weekends off?
David: No. Why would I?
Nina: David we need to have a serious conversation about self care
Nina: I’m glad you have some time off though. Even if you're going insane.
Nina: I tweaked my ankle on Sunday after a show. I’m fine but I have to be off of it for a few more days so I won’t be dancing tonight, tomorrow, or Friday. Unlike you, I understand the power of rest 😉
David looks down at the words, ignoring the way his AC has clicked on, the soft hum of traffic outside his window. The sun was setting, it was getting darker in his apartment and he needed to turn on a light. He could only focus on what to say next.
He was off. She was off.
The math begged for the two of them to come together.
David: Ignoring your cruel reaction to my work ethic, if I wanted to ask you to coffee tomorrow, you could go?
He pauses, waits. She doesn’t respond immediately. He waits a whole five minutes in silence like a fucking psychopath because he’s worried if he does anything else he’ll miss it. That was an issue he’d have to address another time.
Nina: Yes. But only if you ask. Not imply which you are so fond of doing
David can’t help the smile that falls on his face.
David: Right. Nina, would you go to coffee with me?
Nina: I would love to go to coffee with you David
The smile stays, he tries to tone it down but he can’t. It’s some respite, time with her. Something good to come out of this punishment.
David: Great. There’s this place I’ve been curious to check out so I’ll send you the information after I figure out what it's called. I’ve just driven by it a few times and it looked interesting
Nina: Amazing! I have one request though….
He was certain that she could request him to saw off his leg and eat it and he would.
David: Yes?
Nina: You have to finish the remaining episode we left off in Arcane. We only got twenty minutes in and that way we will have something to talk about when we meet.
Nina: I refuse to watch anymore with you if you don’t. Will even refuse to hang out any further
David groans because he really was bad at watching things on his own. He literally just paid nine dollars to take a long nap in a theater. He’ll do it though, he wanted to watch more with her, he was curious about where the story was going. Plus it meant an excuse to spend more time with her. If this was the small price to pay then so be it.
David: Fine 😕
Nina: 😃 Great! Can we meet around 1? I still have to go in for PT and class so that will give me time to come home and change
David: That’s fine
Nina: Parfaite! I have to shower and then cook dinner and most likely will pass out after but I look forward to hearing from you.
Nina: Have a good night David. Don’t drink anymore coffee. Sleep
David’s been standing in the dark, the sun fully set, but he doesn’t care.
He had a date.
-✦-
Nina looks up at the weathered but trendy letters of the building, reading ‘The Collective’ as she looks back down at her phone.
This was the place.
She moves to a window, squinting so she can check herself out one more time. She had opted for an oversized tan sweater that had the perfect v-neck to accentuate her breasts but not look like she was trying too hard. She decided to pair it with just tights, knee high black boots to complete her ensemble. She kept her hair down, straightened and chose to do her makeup, a natural smokey eye to make her seem more enticing. Overall, she was content with the outcome and she sighs, moving away to look out at the parking lot.
He had asked her out on a date.
When Nina had finished rehearsals and saw that he had texted, it had taken all of her not to return his text. She knew that she’d never get home if she did, so she forced herself to wait forty five minutes in shit traffic to text him back.
When she learned he had some free time, she knew she had to give him a little nudge. Just a little. She had exaggerated a bit, her ankle was far better than initially anyone thought, but to be safe she had been asked to consider resting it, just for a few days. She wasn’t going to take it until David let her know he had time off and she refused to let him slip away from her again.
She moves to pull out her phone, debating scrolling on Instagram or Tik Tok, when she hears her name.
The day is overcast, cool for a late September, and David wears a black fitted sweater, simple blue jeans. He looks handsome, he always does, but she likes the way the sweater molds to his shoulders, showing off that neck tattoo she loves. He has a bouquet of flowers in one hand, the closer he gets she realizes they are peonies, and she swoons internally.
Peonies were her favorite flower.
She also has never had a man bring her flowers on a first date and so she can’t stop the smile that forms on her face as David nears.
“Hey!”
“Hi.” He stands in front of her, his lips shifting to that half frown, half smile she adores and he clears his throat, extends the flowers out to her.
“These are for you. I hope you like them, they remind me of you.”
David felt like he sounded like an idiot but he didn’t know how else to give a girl flowers. The only time he ever had was once, when he was like twenty and he was with the girl he was dating at the time as she demanded that he buy them for her. He remembered he had been annoyed but an hour ago he realized how much she had actually done him a solid.
David had woken up early, even for him, anticipating the date. He went to the gym, forcing himself to only run eight miles to deal with his nerves before grabbing breakfast and heading home. He was excited but he was also nervous. What if she realized he was a workaholic and didn’t want to see him? What if she thought he was uninteresting compared to the life she led? What if she realized that she could simply do much better?
He took a shower to get out of his head, trying to shake the anxious thoughts before he stood in front of his closet. What should he wear? A formal or informal shirt? He had maybe four informal shirts total in his wardrobe but he didn’t want her to see him like the rest of Conyers did, a detective, so he finally opted for a black sweater, jeans.
Then there was the matter of what to bring her. He lands on flowers; Nina looked like a woman who appreciated a floral bouquet. He opted to go to a flower shop and not a grocery store because he wants her to know he cares.
That mattered, right?
He has no fucking idea what he’s doing.
Which is obvious when he spends twenty minutes too long in the flower store staring at different stems, multiple workers trying to offer help before he finally gives in. After telling them a bit about Nina, because apparently flowers had a language who knew, they directed him to a section that had his eyes automatically landing on the velvet stems.
Fragile but strong. Delicate but artful, commanding attention. Uniquely beautiful, classical but different. Pink, the color he would always associate with her. A dozen, enough to show her he cared but not enough to overwhelm.
They’re expensive, David’s never spent this much on anything that didn’t provide long term utility but the genuine grin on Nina’s face as she looks at him tells him it’s worth the investment.
Noted.
“They're perfect. One of my favorites.” She takes the bouquet, smelling them before she leans up to place a kiss on his cheek, lips lingering before she pulls away.
“Thank you.”
“You're welcome,” he moves his eyes to the entrance, “There’s a coffee shop inside that I think you’ll like.”
“Okay.”
They get lost trying to find the coffee shop David had researched the night before, there’s at least three in the large market hall and they find out the one they are looking for is on the third floor.
They stand in line, David wants to grab Nina’s hand but also she had kissed his cheek so maybe she wants to take it slow. He doesn’t know what to do so by the time they’ve ordered and sat down, waiting for their coffees and quiche to split, David is antsy.
“Soooooo……”
Nina shifts his attention to her and he asks,
“So?”
“Did you finish the episode?”
“Ah.”
David sits back in his chair, crossing a leg over his thigh.
“I did.”
Nina watches him for a beat before saying,
“Prove it.”
They talk about how the episode ended, Nina satisfied enough that he actually watched it and didn’t use Wikipedia. There coffee and slices of quiche are delivered and David admits,
“I didn’t have a Netflix account so I had to start one.”
“That is actually crazy. I’ve never met anyone who didn’t have any streaming service. Well if you want to cancel, I’m happy to share my information.”
“It’s okay. I’ll keep it just in case you force me to watch something new on my own again.”
It also gave him an excuse to invite her over in the future. He takes a bite out of the quiche, his eyebrows knitting together as he says,
“Holy shit this is actually amazing.”
He had been skeptical when Nina had suggested they eat it, but he wasn’t disappointed by the flavor punching his mouth. Rich and savory.
“I know. Wait till I make you one. I have the best recipe.”
He likes the promise of her words, that she wanted to see him again to make him one. They end up spending an hour at the coffee shop, David orders another coffee while Nina sips on tea. When she snaps a photo of their drinks, angling it artistically David questions why.
“I have a social media account to manage. I have to show that I do things outside of just dancing.”
David knows but also, actually, has no idea what she’s talking about.
They decide to explore the market hall, checking out the many boutiques and shops within it. Nina convinces David to get a pathos when they go into a plant store, buying it for him though he tells her he was horrible at taking care of himself let alone a plant.
“Pathos are easy! Just need water, sunlight, and a little love. This will keep you accountable to making sure you take weekends off. Caring for it and yourself.”
He doesn’t disagree, but he’s still unsure. A plant felt like too much responsibility. He trusted Nina’s opinion though, she was right about the quiche, so he’s at least open to trying. While they are there, Nina also snags a small vase with water to keep her flowers in, and he carries both the vase and his plant as they wander into a bookstore.
Nina learns that David is an avid reader like her, or at least he used to be until he allowed work to consume him. They spend some time in the philosophy section, David goes into full detail explaining to her how he latched on to John Locke, shifting to Michel Foucault before he switched degrees. They stand in the section for forty minutes as she explains the Pagemaster and her beliefs on freewill and fate, David offering his opinion as well, and it's only when an employee asks them if they're okay for the sixth time that they decide to table the discussion for later.
They end up perusing the fiction section, both of them finding two books to read before they check out. A fantasy and horror novel for Nina and a book of poems and autobiography for David.
It's close to 5 p.m. when they leave the shop and David doesn’t want to leave Nina, not yet.
“Would you like dinner? There’s a few places here that look good.”
Nina is overjoyed, she forces herself not to hide around a corner to jump up and down in glee, but instead nods enthusiastically yes.
They decide on Mediterranean, a little sit down restaurant that has an outdoor patio that looks out to the woods, and as they walk across the large market hall this time David pushes his anxiety aside and grabs her hand, plants and books an afterthought.
She easily laces her fingers in his, a natural fit, and she gives him a small smile when they are secure in the other. He feels better, this felt right, being able to hold her, be in her presence this way.
When they sit down, Nina arranges their books, their plants and snaps a shot with the setting sun in the backdrop, fairy lights and finally David asks,
“Why do you need to post this for social media?”
Nina flickers her eyes up to him,
“Well, my followers have expressed they like it when I share stuff about my personal life outside of dancing. Nothing crazy but little things about me. I try to balance both. And because it's also kinda my personal Instagram, for friends and family I might not be near so they can see what I’m up to.”
“You just take photos of things and post them on the internet?”
David doesn’t mean to sound incredulous as he grabs his water, sips on it, but he didn’t get it.
“Yeah. It's a way to be connected to people. Tell a story about your life.”
Ah. That’s why he didn’t get it.
“That’s crazy. People just follow you for it?”
Nina shrugs,
“I think it's crazy I have a following but people appreciate my dancing and think my Instagram is fun. Plus PBC, where I dance now, they like my strong following and wanna use it to help boost their page. So here we are. I’ll probably post something about it later.”
“About our date?”
“Maybe.” She gives a soft smile and David watches her, giving an incredulous smile back.
“Really?”
“Yeah. I won’t say ‘I went on a date with sexy detective Loki’ but you know I’ll hint there’s a guy in my life. It might help keep people from sliding into my DM’s.”
David likes that he’s been bumped up from cute and handsome to sexy, but chooses to pocket it for later. Instead, he focuses on the second part of her sentence,
“...I know that you are using English words but what the hell is a DM?”
Nina laughs,
“You really don’t know anything about social media?”
“I know enough to profile someone from it, to assess messages and trace someone who has been harassing people, but outside of that no, no I don’t.”
“You really are a fascinating human.”
“Not sure if that's a compliment or not.”
“Its a compliment,” Nina moves to grab his right hand, lacing it with hers and placing it on the table. She lifts enough to get her phone over them, taking a quick shot of their hands and smiling satisfied at the result.
Neither of them untangle their fingers as Nina sits down, placing her phone back in her bag.
“There. No more photos.”
“You’re going to post that?”
“The people need to know that I’m on a date with sexy detective Loki without knowing the details.”
She repeats her statement and David’s mouth lifts at the corners as he squeezes her fingers,
“You know, if I was a betting man I would guess that you were hitting on me.”
“What in the world makes you say that?”
“You just called me sexy two times in a row.”
“You are though.”
He hates that the comment makes his smile widen, that she’s managed to pull out a full grin from him and she smiles back at him cheekily,
“You are and you know it.”
“I don’t disagree that I’m not unattractive. It's nice to know that the hot girl I’m into thinks I am though.”
Nina hates the way her face starts to heat up, starting from her nape all the way to her dimpled cheeks. She scrunches her face and says,
“Just hot?”
“I’m trying to stay a gentleman. But since you prefer it when I’m straightforward, I find you incredibly sexy Nina. In so many ways.”
Nina knows she asked for this but she can’t help the way her mouth widens, scrunching her face more. David adds,
“You’re also highly adorable when you're embarrassed. I’ll compliment you anytime, anywhere, and mean every word, just to see that look on your face.”
“David, you are making it so hard for me to keep it cool right now.” Nina needed a bathroom break, a minute to talk to another woman about why this handsome god was bathing her with flattery.
“Don’t. I want you to know that I like you. Make sure you know so when men slide into your DM’s, you're not swayed and wanna see me again.”
He says it simply, finally looking down at the menu and Nina thinks she’s going to actually combust. She instead grabs for her water with her free hand, trying to cool herself before checking out the menu.
It's enough to cause the necessary shift they needed. Confirming what they were unsure about two weeks back when they were in Dandelion.
He still liked her and she still liked him.
They order, deciding to split two dishes together and Nina finally asks him about his tattoos. He shakes his head as he looks down at their hands, still intertwined and she scoffs,
“Why not?”
“I have a request.”
“Oh no, now I have to honor it.”
“You have free will, you can do whatever you want." he counters and she rolls her eyes, remembering the conversation they had on the topic earlier. He was right but still.
“Okay detective, what is it?”
He liked when she called him detective, her voice teasing and so he smiles as he says,
“I will tell you about one of my tattoos,” she narrows her eyes at him as he finishes, “If you tell me about one of yours. A tattoo, a date. And I’ve spotted four on you so that will get me to at least four dates.”
Nina watches him for a split second before she laughs,
“I see why Eddie says you’re very good at your job, mister observer.”
“What can I say, I like a girl with tattoos.”
“That’s fair. I find men with tattoos to be hot,” she pauses, “Especially when you can tell there’s a story behind them.”
He nods slowly and she tilts her head,
“Can I choose which tattoo I want to learn more about?”
“Of course. Only if I can do the same.”
“Seems fair,” she looks at him, eyes darting all over before she asks, “Last question. You only have four tattoos that I know about. Are there any more?”
“I have three more in places that are harder to see clothed, yes. You can ask about them and I’ll tell you where they are if you don’t find them first.”
Nina about spits out her water because that was forward and she liked it. She very much would rather discover them on her own, thank you very much, but she was going to stay a lady. She was not going to sleep with him tonight.
She wanted a long term relationship with him and she worried if they had sex so soon that would take that possibility away.
David watches the way Nina flushes, scrunching her face in discomfort. He has always been a direct person, he hates small talk or talking in circles, so he wanted to be clear with his intentions with her. He was fine with taking it slow, he actually thought it was best, but he also wanted her to know he would love to have her anyway he could.
“Okay. Great.” Nina finally lets out in a fluster and David asks,
“Do you have any more?”
“Where have you seen my tattoos and I can answer that better?”
“Your inner wrist, the back of your neck down your spine, your ankle and one just behind your ear. That one is new though.”
Nina is genuinely impressed, she liked that he just didn’t see her as a pretty face. That he observed pieces of her that were important to her.
“Then yes, I have one more. Wait, I have two more. Also in places you can’t see.”
“I look forward to the day I can.”
This time he eyes her cheekily, his eyes flickering down to her cleavage purposely and Nina huffs out,
“David, you are a flirt.”
“Again, only with the girl I’m attracted to.”
“Noted.”
Their meal comes - a lamb euro plate and a Mediterranean salad with falafel - and they hesitantly pull away from each other as they start on the dish. They decide to just share off of their plates, and it's only after they cut the proteins for easy access that Nina says,
“Okay, I know which tattoo I wanna ask about first.”
“Okay.” David lifts his eyebrows as Nina grins at him.
“I wanna know about your finger tattoos. On your right hand.”
_____________________________________
All content was written originally by me; please do not repost, use, or market as your own work.
Summary: David Loki has made peace with the knowledge that he will traverse the world alone. Except, what happens when a run in with a stranger at a wedding turns his world upside down, causing him to question everything he thinks he wants and needs for himself? Even more so, what does he do when the same woman's life suddenly is in jeopardy.
A/N: Buckle up kitty cats, this next act is for my cozy, tender loving girlies. We’re settling in with these two. We’re going to see aspects of David and Nina that manifest when in the throes of a new romance. Grab a tea. Light a candle. Get carried away because who doesn’t love to get lost in a tender romance? I want you to get lost with the two of them.
Do it now while the angst is mild. I love a slow burn, but I love heavy angst just as much.
Tags are open | Header made by me
-✦-
Chapter 7: Never Saw You Coming
Three months later
The sound of keys falling clashes against the steady stream of traffic, and Nina curses low to herself as she bends down to pick them up. After locking her car door she throws them into her leather tote bag, the silver metal mingling with the rest of the items inside: an extra leotard, two pairs of tights, her phone, a book and her kindle, two sets of leg warmers, a journal, two makeup bags (one to freshen up her face and hold her hair ties, the other to hold her sewing supplies for her shoes), and two worn ballet shoes.
She’d do the dance of finding them later when they were needed.
She looks up at the restaurant that Bianca has chosen, Dandelion. It looks trendy, fun, youthful - a sharp contrast to most of the establishments Nina had seen in Conyers. It gave the appearance of the urban restaurants she walked by in Philadelphia, and Nina appreciates the gesture.
Culture shock was real, very real, and Nina didn’t realize how much it would hit her being back on American soil as it had. She barely drove in the past ten years of her life, but now she owned a car because she couldn’t afford to get a one bedroom of her liking in the city so commuting was the next best option. Public transportation was all but nonexistent in the way she was used to, she didn’t realize how fresh food in Europe was compared to America, and she was still getting used to talking in English more than French.
Still, it meant she was able to be closer to her father, actually have time to connect with her other siblings so she would adjust.
She always did.
She walks into the restaurant, letting the hostess know that her party was already there and then starts the long dance of looking for Bianca.
While she missed the friends she had made in France, in other countries, she was also grateful to be closer to Bianca. It was crazy to think that for half of their friendship they had lived kilometers apart. Bianca would visit Nina occasionally, liking the excuse to come to Europe, but as adults they had never lived close enough to have dinner on a weeknight.
It was nice that they could now do this to catch up.
Bianca had been instrumental in helping her unpack and supporting her to find furniture and other necessary things to replace most of what she had let go in her Parisian apartment.
A waiter steps in her path and she pauses, letting him pass by when the smell of bergamot fills her nostrils and a wave of nostalgia hits her. Cool blue eyes and lips that give a soft smile, tattooed fingers and slicked back hair. She shakes the memory away, pushes it down
down,
down.
Until it’s but a faint flicker in her mind. She’d allow herself to ruminate when she was alone, when she could give herself the space to cry, to wrap herself in the memory. For now she had to be present, okay.
Nina spots a flash of strawberry blonde, knows that it can only belong to her best friend, and moves in that direction. She tugs at the bun on the top of her hair, moving to loosen it so the wet strands of her hair could dry out, still wet with sweat from rehearsals. For that reason, she misses that her friend is not alone until it's too late.
“She’s here!” Bianca’s voice fills the space as she walks closer to it. “Surprise Nina! Welcome back home and congratulations to being a principal dancer in Philadelphia!"
Nina takes in the large round table that holds a chair with balloons attached to it, a vase with flowers, additional chairs and menus waiting to be read.
No, no, no, this was supposed to be a quiet dinner.
Instead, she had walked into the trappings of a surprise party and she was the center of it.
Bianca runs to her, wraps her arms around her as she pulls her closer. The contrast of the two of them always made Nina smile inside, Bianca’s was voluptuous like her, though rounder as she didn't dance six to twelve hours a day, and stood at a proud 5 '1. When she hugged Nina though, who was an average 5’6, she still made the ballerina feel smaller, and she does this now as Nina murmurs,
“B, what the hell is this?”
“Devon and Madi wanted to see you, especially because they didn’t make it to my wedding.”
“Oh my gosh bitch we’re sorry again. Safari’s aren’t cheap, we couldn’t get a refund and you were the one who was being weird about the date.”
The voice comes from Devon as he makes his way to Nina. Nina was glad that Devon had come out after high school, she had wanted him to always be his authentic self, and she was grateful that he was now. Standing at 5’11, orange thick glasses framing his face and somehow not clashing with his fair skin, the huskier man bends down to hug Nina and she’s sure the image of the two of them is just as hilarious as the previous one with her and Bianca.
“Wow bitch you get hotter every time I see you. Apparently I should have joined the corps.”
“Like you have the discipline for it. Remember when you said you would stop drinking?” another voice, feminine and Nina knows it's Madison despite not seeing her. When she pulls away from Devon she’s greeted by the faint smile of her friend, her deep maple skin popping against the low lighting of the restaurant.
“Madi, how have you been?” Nina asks lightly and Madi shrugs as she moves to hug her.
“Oh I’m fine. Dating in this state sucks and B’s still up our ass since she came back from her honeymoon. She’s been spending every day since we’ve been back trying to make us feel guilty that we accidentally scheduled our safari during the wedding.
Even though, like Devon said, she kept changing the date and only gave us confirmation after we made our reservations.”
Nina laughs and nods as she flickers her eyes over to Edward who’s looking down at his phone, an arm wrapped around Bianca.
“Et tu Eddie?” Nina says, moving to give him a quick hug which he reciprocates, giving her a quick squeeze before moving back down to his phone.
“Bianca guilted me. Said she wanted to help you have your community and so we’d surprise you with dinner.”
“The betrayal.” Nina deadpans and Edward chuckles as Bianca pulls her away.
“Well come on now. Sit down so we can hear how it's like dancing with the Philadelphia Ballet Company.”
Nina looks down at the chair Bianca is inferring, then back up at her friends. They're all watching her, but also distracted by their phones, conversing with each other. If she sat down, all that attention and energy would be directed to her and she just finished dancing for seven hours straight.
She was exhausted.
“Let me run to the bathroom first. Traffic was busier than usual getting here.” That was partly true, and she hooks her bag on the chair, snatches her phone out of it.
“Nina!” Bianca can see her trying to plan an escape but Nina wouldn’t be deterred.
“I have to pee oh my gosh I promise I’ll be back! You have my bag as insurance, you know I don’t leave anywhere without it.” Nina gives a half hearted laugh as she moves to find the bathroom.
At least now she could find a minute to breathe.
When was Bianca ever going to learn she hated being the center of attention?
-✦-
David knows he’s late by the way his phone buzzes, the screen lighting up as it sits on his dashboard as he drives across town to the restaurant Edward asked to meet him at. This part of town was different, gentrification clutching its shiny claws into it, so it gave away from the tired and run down look of Conyers to something brighter, cleaner.
The police radio chattering is non-stop this evening, the end of summer and the promise of fall leading way to mischievousness, and he tries to shut the noise down as he pulls into the restaurant parking lot.
He was technically in the middle of a case, 36 hours in, but they had hit a dead end. He was waiting for forensics so he could move forward, circle back to something, have anything definitive. When Edward had texted him out of the blue, saying he’d be in Conyers and would love to meet up for dinner, David didn’t see the harm in it.
He hadn’t seen him since his wedding and he did feel guilty about how little they did connect. It would feel selfish for David to not see him if he was available.
He puts his car into park, the crown victoria letting out a grateful sigh as he propped his elbow out of his open window, exhaling as he moved his other hand over his face.
God he was tired.
Probably also hungry, definitely had too much coffee in his system, and most likely needed to drink water. Sleep was in there too, but he’d allow that once the case was solved.
A typical day for David.
He flickers his eyes up to the billboard that hangs behind the restaurant, the digital ad catching his attention as the LED lights shine against the setting sun. It moves from an ad about a law firm to promoting tickets for the Philadelphia Ballet Company for their fall run of Sylvia.
David didn’t know what Sylvia was, but his brain naturally remembers the smell of rose and vanilla, a soft smile and the way rose gold clashes with copper. He sits in it, the warmth of the memory and her, the way it bites into his loneliness. It distracts him for a minute, takes him away from the mutilated body of the little girl he had seen two days earlier.
Then his radio shifts to static, breaking him from the distraction. His eyes shift away from the billboard, away from the memory of her.
He rolls up his windows and turns off the car. He steps out, grateful for the cool air that penetrates the humidity as fall nears. He locks the door, walking into the restaurant and starting his search for Edward. He moves past the hostess, past the large bar in the center and spots Edward, the large African American man slouching as he looks down at his phone. Except, his arm was hanging loosely around a chair, a woman with strawberry blonde hair and he can tell by her animated mannerisms it’s Bianca.
There are two other people at the large round table, people he’s never met, and a bag hanging loosely from a third chair.
He did not have the energy for this. He was planning to eat dinner, go home to maybe get a few hours of shut eye, three if he was lucky, and then get back to work.
He didn’t want to be social.
He pivots easily, using the bar as coverage as he moves to circle back to the front of the restaurant. This place was big, it might take a little longer to make it back to the entrance, but it was better than getting bombarded with whatever concoction Bianca had planned. Edward would understand.
His phone vibrates in his back pocket and he grabs it, moving to see if there were any updates on the case. He’s so distracted by the message, nothing from the labs but O’Malley doing that annoying thing where he has to text him his thoughts on the case despite not knowing much about it, that he doesn’t see the person until it's too late.
He runs into them hard and his hands naturally shoots out to catch whoever he’s accosted, hands gripping elbows easily so gravity doesn’t take them back. They stabilize, hands equally gripping his arms so they can stay balanced before they look up at him.
Nina had the most beautiful eyes, David had loved looking into them trying to guess the hue. They were brown, flickers of hazel and green dancing in the irises depending on the lighting and it's what he’s greeted with now. Her hair is longer, extremely curly and now has splashes of tan highlights that dance against her darker locks. She’s wearing a leotard, it's a deep wine color and exposes her shoulders and back, though she also has some kind of see through material over the top half, moving over her shoulders and arms. She’s wearing simple grey sweat pants and tennis shoes, but that familiar scent of hers is the same, her lips still plump, her face still gentle and innocent looking.
Nina takes in the stranger she has run into because it isn’t a stranger, she knows him. Nothing about him has changed; he’s still wearing sky blue, the button up still buttoned to his collar, simple black pants. His gun and badge are on full display, his hair still tightly slicked back. His eyes are still ocean blue, highlighted more by his shirt, though they seemed sunken - tired. He still smelled like bergamot, vetiver, cedar wood, and coffee and he still had all the tattoos she had memorized to her brain.
“David?”
“Nina?”
They both look at each other, hands still gripping the other before Nina asks,
“What are you doing here?”
“What are you doing here?” David repeats the question because she was supposed to be miles away, in London, dancing and spending time with her father. That was the impression he had when they had departed months back at least.
Did she lie to him?
“I live here,” she quirks her head to the side and asks,
“Answer the question - what are you doing here?”
Ever to the point. David huffs out a sigh,
“Edward invited me to dinner.”
“Oh mince,” Nina sighs as she shakes her head knowingly, “Bianca orchestrated a surprise party for me. It worked. I was surprised.”
David looks at her, at the way her eyes flicker behind him to where her friends sit and a soft smile tugs on his mouth, the first he feels is genuine in months,
“You were hiding?”
“I was. I was scoping out this place and I think I found a spot she won’t be able to find me in. At least for a while.”
David chuckles, suddenly aware that he was still holding on to her. She was still holding on to him.
“Were you sneaking off?”
Nina’s voice is low, he can hear the disappointment in the words. Maybe she didn’t lie to him. Maybe there was a reason she was here now. It would explain the tone, so he gives her elbows a soft squeeze,
“I was. But only because Edward had implied dinner was just between him and I. I didn’t know that it was a surprise dinner for you.”
Nina gives a slow nod, he sees relief flood her eyes as a deft smile falls on her lips,
“They're the worst, our friends.”
“Yeah they are,” he hesitates for a second, looking behind him before his eyes land on her again, “I am hungry. I would like dinner. And I would like to have dinner with you. I would like to catch up….if you want?”
Nina knows her eyes shift to excitement, can feel it rattling in her bones as she says,
“I would love that. I’m starved too. I’ve been up since five and danced for seven hours and lunch felt like it was decades ago.”
David chuckles as he pulls away from her, hesitantly, and nods.
“Let’s get you fed.”
Nina directs them to a space towards the back of the restaurant, at the bar. It's busy but also dimly lit and they can watch to see if anyone is looking for them from the safety of coverage. David asks for two menus as Nina orders hot water and lemon, a glass of water for the both of them, and David orders another coffee.
“Still drinking coffee until all hours of the night.” Nina notes as she starts to scour the menu, eyes flickering over to his teasingly and his mouth tugs, wants to smile but he fights it.
“I never promised I wouldn’t.”
“I know.”
He looks down at the menu, peruses it quickly and decides to have a cheeseburger before he takes the coffee that's been placed in front of him and starts sipping on it.
“So you live here?”
He decides to break the silence as she looks up from the menu and gives a soft chuckle, crossing her legs. He did want to understand how she had ended up in Conyers. He wanted to make sure that it was fate and not her trying to avoid him, not wanting to get to know him further. That would devastate him, even if he didn’t realize it.
Instead on focusing on that, David shifts his attention to how delicately she balances herself on the small stool, impressed by how lithe she is as she shakes her head up and down,
“I do live here.”
“In Pennsylvania? Or Conyers?”
“Both actually.”
David ingests that information, unsure what to do with it. He was just starting to make peace with not seeing her again. It was becoming easier not to dream about her when he closed his eyes.
Between that and the idea of rejection from someone he had fantasized about after they departed, he felt like he was back to fucking basics regarding his mental health.
Great.
“Why Conyers?” he asks instead and Nina huffs out a sigh,
“Rent in Philadelphia is about as bad as rent in Paris. Except I got a great discount in Paris because the landlord liked ballet and liked my dancing. No such luck here. Conyers is 30 minutes from the city so my dad suggested I move here and commute. He lives here too so he was able to help me look for apartments.”
David drinks in this information, exhales because that was in alignment with what she had shared with him at the wedding. He probes,
“So that means you’re dancing with the Philadelphia Ballet Company.”
“I am. I’m a principal there. They’re really happy, they think I’ll help them put more people in seats.”
“Your dad decided not to retire in Scotland?”
Nina smiles as her hot water shows up, the lemon. Two glasses of water are placed down and the bartender asks for the order. Nina opts for a kale and butternut squash salad with salmon, and when they're done she looks over at him.
“He did. Apparently, one of my brothers and his wife had a pregnancy scare and my dad wanted to make sure he was nearby. It ended up being false unfortunately. I had told Philadelphia Ballet Company that I was going to dance for them by that point so I was coming here whether he liked it or not.
Between that and my dad realizing that he would go to Scotland but his kids would stay here, that he’d miss out on other family stuff like babies and essentially be alone he decided to not sell his house and stay here. So here we are.”
“Here we are.” David repeats, placing his coffee down and moving to his water.
“I can’t believe you're here.” he finally says and Nina laughs as she sips on her hot water and lemon.
“I can’t believe you’re here. Do you work nearby?”
He gives a dry laugh,
“I work here in Conyers. I’m a detective for the police department.”
“Oh!” Nina is surprised as David nods,
“Yeah. I live here too.”
They sit with that knowledge, with the awareness that they were no longer miles away from each other. That the thoughts and hopes in their minds were well founded. Also recognizing how terrifying it felt to have something that had become akin to a dream move to the surface of reality.
They spend the next thirty minutes catching up, Nina re-telling all the ups and downs that came from moving to a new country. She speaks about her excitement for joining a new ballet theater, the friends she was making and the social media ideas she had to boost awareness of her brand in America, and for the theater. David likes this side of her, seeing where her passion lies and how enthusiastically she spoke about it even if it felt overwhelming to him.
David ingests her words slowly, alternating between drinking water and coffee. Nina notices he’s different, not in his demeanor or his personality, but he checks his phone consistently, pauses to text quickly on the glass device. He looks tired but he also wore it on his body, shoulders sagged and eyes weary as he smiles over at her.
She wondered if he was working a case and asks as much,
“How about you David? I’ve been chatting and chatting and haven’t even asked about you, I’m sorry. That’s incredibly rude of me.”
David pauses as he finishes responding to an email, shaking his head as he gives her a reassuring smile. The labs were back. He’d make space for that when he wasn’t around her.
“It's okay, you’re not rude at all. I’m being rude. Sorry to be on my phone, just work,” he flips his phone over, shifting his focus to her, “I’m not a really interesting guy. I primarily work if I’m not sleeping.”
“David I think you're plenty interesting you just don’t know it,” she pauses, “So you're working a case now?”
He drifts away from her, eyes watching the restaurant before giving a curt nod.
“Is it…a hard case?”
He flickers his eyes to her, eyebrows drawn together as he says,
“It's tough. A little girl was murdered. I’m heading the investigation.”
Nina drinks in David, the soft way he mutters the words, the way his eyes drift away as if he’s in another place. His hand moves to twirl the pinkie ring she was used to seeing him twirl, mind distracted.
She had heard about the murder, her dad had told her about it when they had dinner a few days back, getting sentimental as he empathized with the parents. It sounded horrific, she couldn’t imagine what David was going through.
She places a hand gingerly on his arm, causing him to break from his thoughts as she whispers,
“I’m sorry.”
She knows there’s nothing more that she can say, no words that can take away the weight he was putting on himself. She didn’t know David, he was as much a mystery to her as she was to him, but she knew that he was thoughtful and that he cared about what he did deeply.
The way he was looking at her now, she could tell he cared to find justice for this girl. That knowledge broke her heart.
David is unsure what to do. He’s never had anyone look at him the way Nina was, care and concern laced in her eyes, fingers rubbing small circles on his arm in comfort. She moves closer to him, face watching him as he looks back at her. She wasn’t just saying sorry about the little girl, he’s sure that she is, but it was more. She was expressing concern for him.
It scares the shit out of him. He can feel his body breaking down, maybe from the lack of sleep, the pressure of the case, but this scares him. He feels like he has to get away, far, far away.
Yet, he had been away from her. For three months. It had been hell. This was scary but it was nice to feel seen again.
He doesn’t know what to do, he’s at a crossroads so he just looks at her. Mind reeling, eyes blinking in a series of tics, three, trying to gain some control, to not give into the level of emotions bubbling within him.
Nina feels like she’s said too much, she’s pushed him, David’s gone rigid, quiet. More quiet than usual. She offers a small smile,
“I don’t mean to pry. You have a hard job, one of the hardest in the world I’d argue. I’m here if you need it. Here to listen or to distract you but I’m here now. If you want, I don’t want to assume.”
Now she’s frowning, fumbling, unsure if she’s making sense. She didn’t want to assume that just because she was closer he’d want her. Three months can change a person. Can change a lot of things. He could be dating someone for all she knew, be in love with someone.
The idea of that causes her to internally combust and she tries to pull away from him.
He stops her.
He places his hand on top of hers, gives it a little squeeze before saying,
“Thank you. Sorry. I’m just not used to talking to anyone who isn’t in law enforcement about….work. I’m not…sure what to say.”
Nina nods as he squeezes her hand again, his eyes looking deep into hers, the silent words unable to tumble out of him.
Please stay.
Please listen.
I need it.
I need you.
“Anyways, I don’t think I’ll be able to stay and watch Arcane with you this time. I need to head back into work.”
He breaks them out of their thoughts, the sound of the restaurant moving back into focus for the both of them. Their food is half eaten and he moves to get the bartenders attention for the check.
When he moves to pay for both of them Nina protests,
“No David you can’t!”
David shakes his head, taking out his debit card and sliding it with the check.
“It's my pleasure. Consider it a welcome to Conyers gift. For your surprise party.”
Nina sits back in her seat, resting her head on her hand as she just smiles,
“Fine. May I make a request to go along with this gift?”
“You’ve had me for forty five minutes and you're already making demands?”
She lets out a small giggle and nods,
“It's for your own good. You have to finish Arcane. So we can talk about it next time we meet.”
David finishes the last of his water before he looks over at her,
“I already told you I’d probably not watch it without you. Still holds true.”
“David!”
He gives a small smile, debating if he should do what he probably should’ve done three months ago. Ask for her number. Open the door to possibility.
David wasn’t a spiritual man but he did believe that fate always had plans for people and this was the second time their paths were crossed. In a restaurant named Dandelion of all places. This time she was here for good. He asked for this. If he ignored it, if he didn’t honor the gift the universe was providing, he deserved to get shot in the line of fire.
He was willing to take a chance.
Even if it scared the absolute shit out of him.
“Maybe you can give me your number and we could find a time to watch it together. Or get dinner. Or both.”
Nina studies him carefully, just for a minute, before a large smile falls on her face.
“I would like that. Give me your phone, I’ll put it in.”
He hands her his phone and she takes it, then frowns.
“Actually, I have a new number, American, and I haven’t memorized it fully well. Can you text yourself with my phone?”
He nods as she hands his phone back to him, grabbing hers and handing it to him after she unlocks it for him. He notes that it's organized, easy to find the message tab, and he opens it, sending a text to his number.
Nina’s phone number
His phone lights up a second later and she smiles as she takes her phone back, picking it up and quickly sending another response before saving his number in her contacts.
‘This is Nina! Watch Arcane 😀
The bartender rings them out and when he gets his card back he hesitates,
“It might be a while before I reach out. I’m only here because I was waiting for something at work to help me move forward. I tend to….disappear into cases until they are solved.”
He wanted her to know he was interested, to try to give him a chance because he didn’t need a psychic to tell him he was the worst at dating, even worse at communicating. The man Nina knew from the wedding was not the man he typically was.
He wanted to make sure he still had a chance.
“I understand,” Nina says softly before exhaling, “to be honest, my debut at the Philadelphia Gala is next week and then I have a lot of shows plus everyone in my family is constantly trying to see me so I understand, I do. We’ll figure it out.”
“We will.”
He gets up hesitantly, noting the way his phone was lighting up and vibrating. A lab tech, Johnson, wondering where he was. It was rare for him to not have shown up at the station with new information available.
“You better go.” Nina notes and he nods as he grabs his phone, throws it in his back pocket. He hesitates, he wants to kiss her, god he wanted to taste her lips again, but that felt too forward, the magic of the wedding weekend no longer an excuse. Shaking her hand felt too formal, would send the wrong message.
She gets up from her seat, stretching and he winces at the sound of bones popping though she seems unphased as she replies through her stretch,
“See you soon.” She moves to hug him, he was okay with that, and he hugs her back, squeezing her to him before they pull away. They look at each other again, he can tell she’s debating kissing him too before she places her hand on his cheek and uses her thumb to rub it.
He’s scratchy, she likes the shadow he still sports as she whispers,
“Be safe David.”
He smiles, nods.
“I will. Take care Nina, talk with you soon.”
He moves away from her as she goes back to sitting at the bar, finishing her meal. She reaches for her phone, acknowledging the many texts from Bianca who was basically freaking out and texts back:
Nina: Be over soon. Sorry. I ran into an old friend. I do think I’ll like it here.
Then she returns to eating her meal, allowing herself to daydream about the possibility of the two of them together.
-✦-
The figure watches the way Nina settles back into her seat, not paying her phone any attention as her eyes flicker up to the large TV screen in front of her. Her back is to them at this angle, and they are forced to sit outside the restaurant in their car. They wonder what she smells like. Her back is exposed, minus the thin strands from her leotard and they imagine what her skin would feel like, how it would feel to touch her.
She was beautiful and finally, after years in Europe, she was within reach.
There’s movement to the side and the man she was sitting with moves to his car, getting into it. There’s a flash of gold, a badge, and a frown falls on their face. That might be a problem. They’d deal with it when the time came, if he proved to be a threat.
They didn’t like the way they had both looked at each other, Nina and this man, the longing way their eyes stayed on each other. The way she cupped his cheek was far more intimate than a kiss and they worried what that meant for them.
They pull out their phone, clicking on the Instagram app. They find her page easily, it's public, and they move to send her a message.
You’re so beautiful. Excited to see you dance.
Soon.
Soon she would be theirs.
______________________________________
All content was written originally by me; please do not repost, use, or market as your own work.
Summary: David Loki has made peace with the knowledge that he will traverse the world alone. Except, what happens when a run in with a stranger at a wedding turns his world upside down, causing him to question everything he thinks he wants and needs for himself? Even more so, what does he do when the same woman's life suddenly is in jeopardy.
A/N: Did I make myself cry writing this in an insomniac haze at 1 in the morning? Maybe. I’ve had a similar experience so it re-triggered some nostalgic sadness. Does it make me excited for the second act though? Also yes.
Tags are open | Header made by me
-✦-
Chapter 6: Inside A Beginning, There Is An End
Nina drops the large tote she picked up from Bianca’s aunt earlier that morning and takes in the reserved space of the lakeside restaurant with a lump in her throat. It was the final day, brunch, and it also meant that afterwards she would be heading back to Paris. Back to reality and back to her responsibilities. Away from Pennsylvania.
Away from David.
Last night was probably the most romantic night of her life and if that was it, nothing more in regards to romance for her, then she would happily take it. After their make out session on the dock, David had gotten them a Lyft back to the hotel. They had ended up at the hotel bar, still not wanting to depart from each other. They ordered tea though David never touched his, and Nina stayed tucked in his arm as they huddled in a booth watching a pianist play to the crowd. When it was over, he had walked her to her room and left her with a parting kiss, promising to meet her to help set up in the morning.
She probably slept for maybe four hours, her mind reeling back to the way it felt to kiss David, the protective way he had held her in the booth they sat in, the way his eyes watched her earnestly.
She was soooooooo fucked.
She starts to pile things out of the tote, trying to focus on a task versus the lingering feeling of heartache, completely oblivious to David as he steps into the room.
David watches Nina from the edge of the door, two cups of coffee in his hand - black for him and a cappuccino for her. He meant to meet her at her room this morning and drive them over to the restaurant to decorate together, but a text from O’Malley had distracted him. Apparently vacation time was up.
After ensuring the older lieutenant he’d look into the investigative details of a new case when he got back to Conyers, he cursed himself for overshooting the time, knowing most likely Nina had checked out of her room and was already gone.
She was, like him, efficient.
Instead he took the extra time to stop for coffee, figured that was more practical than flowers since she was flying back across the ocean, and decided that if he had a few more hours with Nina he would make the most of it.
He clears his throat, catching her attention as he walks into the space. Nina shoots her head up from the tote, small vases clinking in her hands before she beams up at him. She’s wearing the flannel shirt he spotted her in when they first met, the material hiding the tan lacy crop top she wore underneath it. She had cut off jean shorts and converses, her hair in soft waves and David can’t help the way his lips tug into a familiar half smile.
Now he understood why Hades was willing to risk it all for Persephone.
“Hey.”
Nina liked David in the clothes he wore, formal shirts and nice pants, but she also didn’t mind this informal version of him. He was in a simple grey tshirt, jeans, the most casual she had ever seen him and it exposes all of the tattoos she was hoping to memorize in her mind when she was nostalgic and reflected back on him.
“Hi,” she moves her eyes to the two coffees he’s holding and asks, “I hope one of those is for me?”
Her tone is hopeful and teasing at once and nods.
“It would be rude for me not to bring you one.” he walks over to where she’s squatting and she places the vases down, standing to take the drink.
“Thank you.” She hesitates for a brief second, before she leans up and presses her lips to his. He kisses her back, soft and slow, and David cups her face to bring her closer to him. It's only when her phone starts buzzing in her back pocket that they pull away and David brushes his thumb over her cheek as she pulls the metallic device out to look down at Bianca’s name flashing on the screen.
“I should probably get this.”
David nods, looking over at the plastic storage container.
“Want me to pull out things?”
She nods as she answers the phone, pulling her phone away instantly from her ear as Bianca speaks loudly at her. They talk briefly, Nina assuring her that everyone was due to show up at 11:30. When she hangs up she pulls up another set of photos, and David gives a relieved huff as he looks at her screen.
“This is far easier than the last time we decorated.”
“One hundred percent. Pretty sure it's because Bianca thought we’d all be hungover and had mercy on us.”
“I’m grateful either way.”
They move to organize the space, placing the little decorations methodically on tables, and it's only when they finish that David says distractedly,
“I have to do something real quick but I’ll promise I’ll be back before it gets too crazy.”
Nina looks up from her phone, another text by Bianca shifting her attention and nods, moving to find her phone charger and find a seat in the corner.
“You better David. Hungover Bellfleurs are even worse than when they’re drunk and you’re my lifeboat.”
David gives a small smile, if she only knew how much he understood that, and walks over to her to bend down and plant a kiss on her forehead.
“Promise I won’t abandon you.” he mumbles against her skin, before departing out towards the entrance, the plan he had been sitting on at the forefront of his mind.
Nina can’t help the small smile that creeps on her face. She liked that David was tender and soft with her, that she wasn’t an afterthought even though they both knew the prospect of them being together was doomed. She still wasn’t used to the sort of attention he provided but she was going to hold onto it for as long as she could.
By the time David has arranged everything he needs, he walks back into the now full restaurant space and silently curses himself for losing track of time again. He blames the lack of sleep mingled with the adrenaline in his blood, his body gripping onto anything to stay present in the moment, and he weaves through the crowded space trying to find Nina.
“Loki, there you are.”
It's Edwards voice, he’d be able to pinpoint it anywhere, and he stops to navigate towards his friend. He’s standing with Steven and….Matt? David’s not sure and at this point doesn’t care enough to know.
“Hey.”
“Where have you been?”
“Just had a little business to attend to.”
Edward watches him, observes the way David’s eyes flicker out back to the crowded space, eyes tracking, seeking.
“You good? I barely saw you last night at the reception.”
“Yeah, I’m good. It was a nice dinner. Decent music. You could’ve thrown in at least one Killswitch or Kaskade song but I’ll forgive you since it was your wedding day. Consider it my personal gift.”
Edwards laughs, breaking from the group of men and moving closer,
“You stayed for most of the reception?”
“Yeah.”
“Why? No offense but I thought you’d head back to your hotel room once dinner was served.”
David tracks copper skin, dark hair as it clashes with Bianca’s golden locks, the new bride resting her head on Nina’s shoulder as they chatted to a group of bridesmaids.
“Nina wanted to stay.” David responds distractedly.
“Ohhhhhhhhhhhh,” Edward can’t help the big o that forms on his mouth, nor the way his eyes pop open as he tracks David’s line of sight. “I see. Listen, I’m actually a huge fan of you and Nina getting together but she doesn’t-”
“I know she doesn’t live here.”
Edward can tell he’s struck a nerve by the way David’s eyes blink in a stream of three, the way his lips press into a thin line. Edward waits a breath before tentatively saying,
“I support whatever you want David. I just don’t want to see either of you getting hurt. She’s not just across the country faraway, she’s in a whole ass other country faraway. Just ... .look out for yourself man okay?”
David flickers his eyes over to Edward who’s watching him cautiously, concern lining his forehead and David exhales because he knew Edward couldn’t help but to look out for him. Edwards acted as David’s big brother, was his big brother even if it was only by three months, the moment they befriended each other in Huntington, and any advice he gave came from a place of love. He wouldn’t voice his concern if he didn’t find reason to.
“Sorry. I just, I know. We both do.” David breathes out and Edwards nods, giving his friend a rueful smile before asking,
“What do you need?”
“Just need to find a way to get her away from this. Not sure Bianca will let me steal her away though.”
Edward lifts his hand, the one with a new titanium wedding band on it, shaking his head,
“Say no more. I got you.”
The two men walk over to where the group of women stand, their attention focused on Nina who was wearing a frown on her face.
“What do you think they're talking about?” David ponders, his voice low and Edward gives a chuckle, placing a hand on David’s chest.
“Let’s pause for a second and see.”
Nina is tired, wishing she had the drive to entertain Bianca’s friends but the reality was she only had so much mental energy and she was trying desperately to maintain it to converse with David, get to the airport and on a plane on time.
Instead she was in the line of fire, the women grateful she was finally free to answer the question that has been on all their minds since the wedding.
“So what’s up with you and Loki?”
A question from Elise, her wide eyes watching her curiously and Nina flits her eyes out towards the lake, towards the water as she shrugs,
“Nothing. We’re the maid of honor and best man so you know, we had duties for our folks.”
“That makes sense. Is he single? Bianca said he was single.” Another question, this time from Jenny, someone Nina and Bianca had gone to school with and Nina shrugs again,
“Yeah, he told me he was.”
“Oh man, I got to get his number.”
“I just feel like last night he wasn’t looking at you like you were random strangers supporting your friends. You both kept in each other's orbit the whole night….at least until you both disappeared.” this from Elise who was still watching Nina skeptically and Bianca sighs as she says,
“Can we not talk about last night? I’m so hungover.”
Nina knew that was Bianca’s way of diverting the questions, to take it off Nina but the women were not to be deterred.
“I mean if he’s single, it can’t hurt to get his number. He’s so hot.”
“And mysterious. I like that in a man.”
“I feel like he has a thing for Nina. I think you’re all insane to go after a man who is obviously into her.”
“Hey babe.”
Edward’s voice cuts through the girl's banter, and Nina shoots her head to where he stands, giving a relieved sigh when she sees David by his side. The women quiet as Bianca pushes off Nina, walks and falls into Edwards arms.
“I am so hungover.” she mumbles and Edward assures her as he rubs her back, drawing her closer to him.
David’s eyes meets Nina’s, his mouth tugging into a small smile before he says,
“Sorry ladies, I need to borrow Nina.”
“You always have to borrow Nina.” Bianca mutters into Edwards chest and the large man quickly answers,
“Well they are basically running brunch so we should let them do their job.”
Bianca hums into Edwards chest, who mouths ‘go’ and Nina doesn’t hesitate to move past him and the rest of the women in the group, snagging her tote bag that’s been sitting at her feet. David places his hand on the small of her back, following her easily as they make their way out of the busy reserved space and it's only when they exit that Nina gives a sigh of relief.
“Is this what waterboarding feels like? Because I feel like I’ve been waterboarded.”
David chuckles, unable to keep the amused grin off his face as he looks down at her,
“Probably not.”
“Please tell me the manager needs us for the next forty five minutes.”
He shakes his head, hand still pressed flat on her back as he starts to move her towards the opposite side of the restaurant.
“Not quite. I do though, and if you’re open it can be for the rest of brunch. I checked with the restaurant staff, everything will basically run itself regarding post wedding brunch. We just need to be easy to access to clean up our things.”
Nina doesn’t hesitate in following, liking the way he was guiding her, causing them to be close.
“Haven’t you learned that I thrive off hiding from others.”
They walk for a few minutes more, into another section of the restaurant that is closed off by glass walls and gives the perfect view of the lake. David directs them to a corner booth, it's shaded and cool, and a table that waits for them patiently that faces the large lake. There’s a vase of flowers in the middle of it, along with a carafe of coffee, water, bacon, fruit, and a variety of pastries.
“I know we don’t have much time together and I know that we probably won’t see each other again but I thought it would be nice to….have one last meal together.”
David scrunches his eyebrows together, frowning, because it sounded sillier when he said it out loud than what he had concocted earlier in his mind. Nina, however, doesn’t care in the slightest; she’s touched by the small act, that he thoughtfully stole them away to spend just a few more hours together.
Yeah, one of this man’s love languages was definitely acts of service. She dispels his uncertainty, grabbing his hand and diverting his attention back to her.
“Wanna finish watching Arcane? Well try to….I think we have five episodes left and they're all an hour each.”
David shifts his eyes towards her and smiles.
“I’d love to.”
-✦-
They end up crouched in the corner together, huddled close while they nibbled on the goodies David’s supplied, watching Arcane on Nina’s Iphone. They get through two episodes before Bianca and Edward message them that they are leaving, and they meet their friends at the restaurant entrance to wish them goodbye.
Bianca’s still hungover but she smiles into her friend's hug, whispers to her to take a chance while Edward gives David a big hug, reminding him that they would need to meet up soon for dinner, though he knows with David that might be months from now.
When they move back to their secret space, Nina tucks herself into David's side, resting her head in the crook of his shoulder and he wraps his arms around her, dragging her as close as he can to him as he traces idle designs on her clothed arm. It feels natural to be wrapped up in each other like this, normal, they both wonder what it would be like if circumstances panned out a different way, but they don’t linger on it.
They allow themselves to stay present.
They watch an episode more before someone from the restaurant asks them to clean up the reservation space, most of the guests now gone. On top of that, Nina needed to start making her way to the airport so they hesitantly pull away from each other, trying to ignore the fact reality was waiting for them.
They're slow to tidy up the space, quiet and reflective and it's only when they walk out of the restaurant, David towing the large plastic container Nina had brought that they both know they can’t avoid goodbye any longer.
“Thank you for getting that back to Edward and Bianca.” Nina nods towards the plastic tote that David drops at his feet as they near her rental car. She unlocks it, placing her bag in the front seat before closing it and meeting him near the trunk.
“Its no problem at all.”
Nina nods as she looks down at her feet, shaking her head and sighing to herself. She hated goodbyes. She’d always been bad at them, despite the many she’s given in her life, and this one felt worse because it was a beginning that felt like it abruptly was coming to an end.
When she finally is able to will herself to look back up, she’s greeted with David’s eyes, ocean orbs that watch her patiently, tenderness ebbed in the irises.
“Guess this is goodbye.” She tells herself not to cry, it felt ridiculous to be so emotional about someone she barely knew and yet something in her heart told her she wasn’t wrong to feel so deeply. She tries to dispel the feeling with a joke,
“You better finish watching Arcane. We left off at a really good part.”
David’s never felt this way before, this feeling of deep longing mixed in with desire, but he was familiar with the feeling of loss that was tugging within him and so he leans into that. It might have been a few days, and he may not know her as much as he wanted, but he was happy for the memory of it all. He couldn’t remember the last time that he wasn’t thinking about work, where he considered his needs over those at his job, so he would appreciate the gift that this weekend was.
He was able to see his brother get married and he was able to get a taste of what that could be like for him, even if it was small.
“I’ll probably wait to watch it with you again.”
Nina shakes her head, a smile sealing her lips,
“David, I rarely come to see Bianca. Before this wedding the last time I was state side was two years ago.”
“I can be incredibly patient. Watching it without you doesn’t seem right, anyways.”
Nina tries to fight the tear that rolls down her face, she really does, but it wins. Then another and David steps towards her, brushes his thumb over her cheek as he cups her face kissing the tear away, the third that rolls down soon after. A gust of wind suddenly moves through, causing Nina to squeeze her eyes shut and when she opens them David notes the white fuzz on her eyelash, a puffball. He plucks it from her eye, holding it gingerly on his thumb as he says,
“Make a wish. We can’t have it going wasted.”
She looks down at the fuzzy seed, then back up at him and closes her eyes and wishes. She hopes to see him again, hopes that when their paths cross next time it's not for a few hours but can be more permanent, allow them to see if they could work together, and when she opens her eyes she blows hard, willing it into the universe.
David watches her while she does this, wishing he had enough courage to at least ask for her number, to stay in touch in some capacity. Except he knows he’ll want more, she was easy to drown in and she brought out his inner desire to have love, so instead he hopes that he’ll see her again, that the next time they meet it won’t be the last but genuinely a beginning.
They watch the soft cotton fly in the air, picked up again by wind and when it's finally out of sight they return their attention to each other. David doesn’t say anything, doesn’t ask for permission, just leans down to kiss her, lips pressing hard against hers. She complies, places her hands on top of his as he continues to cup her face, and she doesn't resist when he coaxes her mouth open with his tongue.
They stay tangled in each other until neither can breathe, seeking air, and when David pulls away he presses his forehead to hers, shaking his head.
“Be good Nina. I hope that wherever you end up, they treat you well and you’re happy.”
Nina nods, squeezing his hands and whispering,
“You be good too David. Take care of yourself. You drink far too much coffee for the average human being, and I live in Europe where all we enjoy is coffee. Take a break and sleep sometime.”
David laughs, it's low and full of amusement as he nods, placing one last tender kiss on her forehead before he steps away.
He watches as she steps to the driver's side of her car, takes the plastic tote and steps away to watch her pull off and wave goodbye. Drinks in her car until he can’t see it any longer, taking one final sigh before he moves the bin to his own vehicle.
Neither of them will think much about the wish they cast on the dandelion, but the universe will.
You yearn enough for something you want and sometimes, just sometimes, the universe will listen.
End of Act 1
_____
All content was written originally by me; please do not repost, use, or market as your own work.
Summary: David Loki has made peace with the knowledge that he will traverse the world alone. Except, what happens when a run in with a stranger at a wedding turns his world upside down, causing him to question everything he thinks he wants and needs for himself? Even more so, what does he do when the same woman's life suddenly is in jeopardy.
A/N: This chapter is probably one of my favorites so far for this act. I really enjoyed exploring David’s deep emotional side, trying to understand the psyche of an individual who has to see cruel acts of humanity. I hope you enjoy.
Tags are open | Header made by me
-✦-
Chapter 10: Meet Me In the Middle
David didn’t expect her to pick up.
He expected to be sent to her voicemail, where he was going to leave a long message apologizing for his absence and if he could make it up to her.
Or maybe he was going to tell her about the rough fucking week he had.
The absolute nightmare the past six hours had been.
Who knows but either way, he wasn’t expecting for her to wake up.
To be honest, he doesn’t understand the need to call her. This wasn't like him. He’s had tough shit at work happen before and usually he just allows himself to sit in it.
He doesn’t want to tonight though. No, he wants someone to sit in it with him.
“Hello?” she asks it again, louder this time and he clears his throat as he says back,
“Hello.”
There’s silence on her end, he’s not used to Nina being silent and so he asks,
“Are you still there?”
“Yeah.” another pregnant pause, he can hear her breathing softly before she says, “Are you okay?”
Was he okay? He didn’t fucking know. He was living off a few hours of sleep, despair, disappointment. Shock. Grief.
No, he wasn’t okay.
“No.”
There’s another pause, silence, then Nina sighs.
He knows that sigh.
She’s bothered by him; he’s upset her. He ignored her for more than a week and she was over him. Realized how fucking taxing it would be to date a guy like him. Realized how better off she'd be without him.
Now it was two in the morning and he was trying to dump all his shit on her, thinking it's okay after one date.
He shouldn’t have called.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Her voice is softer, kinder, he could only imagine the way her eyes would look at him and he squeezes his eyes shut, opening them in a series of three blinks.
Was she pitying him?
He didn’t want to be pitied.
“I didn’t mean to wake you up Nina, I should let you go-”
“David, do you need to talk about it?”
Her voice is still soft, still kind but it's firmer, worried.
Yeah, he wanted to talk to her.
But not if it was to quell her conscience.
“...I don’t know. I don’t…normally talk about this stuff.”
His voice is cold, distant. He doesn’t want to be pitied. It's all he can think as she bites into the receiver,
“Tell me what you feel comfortable sharing. Boundaries, remember. You can share what you feel comfortable sharing with me.”
Her voice is still gentle, steady and David shakes his head.
“You shouldn’t have to help some guy you met at your friend's wedding just because he panic called you at two in the morning.”
Nina sighs again, this time it sounds like it's more out of frustration than anything else and he exhales as his eyes flurry into a series of blinks. He can hear something in the background, a click, perhaps a light as she huffs into the phone,
“David, everybody needs somebody. I might be mad at you because you never texted me and I was worried shitless about you and then a little sad, but it doesn’t take away from the fact that I still really like you.
You’re not just some guy. You’re a guy that I really like. I care about you and if you need to be on the phone and talk through some of the nasty shit you saw right now, you can do it with me.
I will always be here to listen. I promise. I will until you don’t want me to be.”
David squeezes his eyes shut again, shudders. He can feel the tears welling in his tear ducts, the way they threaten to overtake his body.
It wasn’t pity.
She still cared about him.
She still wanted to be around.
He still mattered to her.
Forever if he wanted.
He knows why he called her. He was expecting her to be upset. He wanted her to be upset. He wanted her to pull away.
He wanted an excuse to sit in this feeling.
He wasn’t expecting her to be patient. To care.
That realization causes him to freeze.
“David?” her voice, cutting through the noise in his head.
“Yeah.”
“You can talk to me if you need. But if that feels overwhelming, if that feels like too much, I can talk to you. Or we don't have to talk at all and we can just sit on the phone. Whatever you need.”
He exhales, a tear slipping out of his right eye, then his left.
“Whatever I need?”
“Yes.” she assures.
“Okay.” It's a soft whisper but she takes it.
“Okay. Whatever you need when you’re ready.”
He doesn’t talk for another couple of minutes, but when he does his voice is raspy and dry.
“I can’t tell you everything.”
“Tell me what you can.”
“Mom murdered her husband. Ran away with her two kids.”
“I heard about that. My brother was telling me about it. You were heading the investigation?”
“Yeah.”
“Did you find them?”
He pauses for a second, a flash of the woman's face comes to the front of his mind.
“Yeah.”
“Did you find them alive?”
Another pause, another couple of minutes of silence. Finally,
“Yes.”
She sits in the silence, waiting. Understanding that this was far bigger than her liking him and him liking her.
He needed to feel safe. He needed to be heard but most importantly, he needed to feel safe in being heard.
“...she was…” he pauses, the spit he swallows is thick. It feels like honey coating his throat, heavy and sticky. He tries again, taking a deep breath. “She was threatening to kill them, her kids. She wanted to get them away from him, her husband. I think he was abusing one of them. But she had a gun and she was aiming it at the kids.”
The memory rushes to the front of his mind. The fear in the children’s eyes. The fear in her eyes. The anger.
“She aimed her gun at me, and then at them.”
He had tried to talk her down, tried to calm her. He had told the other fucking cops to not follow him, to let him handle it.
They were just doing what was standard procedure, coming around the back. He knew that.
But it spooked her.
“She moved to shoot the kid.”
Her gun barrel to the youngest kid's head, shifting the safety off. Her hand was shaky but the determination in her eyes was not. The flash of fear the young boy's dark eyes flashed at him. He had no other choice. He had to. He had to…
“Shoot her. I shot her in the head.”
The sound of her body hitting the ground, gun falling from her hand.
The sound of her children, screaming, staring at their dead mothers crumpled body.
The look in their eyes as they looked back at him. Like he was a monster. Like he was to be feared.
Oh god.
He hated using his gun.
He hated using his gun.
He hated….
He doesn’t realize he’s saying this outloud, in broken sobs, until Nina’s tender voice finally breaks through, soothing him, calming him. Hot tears run down his face, snot mingling with salt water as his heart breaks again with the realization of what he’s done. He killed their only parent.
What if they end up orphans?
What if they don’t end up finding a home?
What if he just broke them?
What if they end up like him?
Broken, alone.
Nina assures him patiently, calmly. She does it for an hour, long past when his tears dry up and his voice is so raw he can’t say much of anything else.
“What do you need David?”
She asks him tenderly after twenty minutes go by in silence and he sighs, finally falling back on his bed, not caring that he’s still in his jacket, clothes still on. He closes his eyes as he whispers,
“You.”
He can hear her soft chuckle, and wishes she was in his arms and the sound was near his ear.
“I’m too tired to drive to you and you should probably not drive to me.”
“Then stay on the phone with me.”
“Okay.”
“Tell me every single detail I’ve missed about your life since I’ve been away. Tell me how much you hate me. Tell me anything to make me forget.”
“I don’t hate you David,” she pauses, “Well, I hated you for a day but I worked through that. I don’t hate you now.”
She teases and he laughs, appreciating that she knew when he needed humor, when he needed to be distracted.
“That’s fair.”
“We’re not going into depth about this now, but once you’ve allowed yourself to sleep we’re going to have a nice long conversation about communication, you and I.”
“That’s also fair.”
“I know,” she pauses and then says in a low tender tone, “Thank you for trusting me enough to call me David.”
He frowns as she continues,
“You could have called Eddie but you called me. That helps your case, just a little bit.”
She's teasing again and he gives a small chuckle even though that realization still hits him in the chest like an anvil. He had enough time to change his mind about not calling her. After leaving the hospital. Once he had ensured the kids were put up in a nice hotel for the night before they figured out what to do with them. On the drive home to his apartment.
He could’ve called Edward.
Instead, the whole time, he just wanted to call her.
He only ever wanted to be able to call her.
“Thank you for…listening.”
“Told you I’m a good listener.”
“You are.”
There both quiet until Nina says,
“Did I tell you I ended up in the Philadelphia Times?”
-✦-
Nina and David stay on the phone until the sun breaks on the horizon, or at least Nina thinks so. She’s fallen asleep and by the sounds of the steady breathing on the phone, so has David. She hangs up, avoids texting him just in case his phone isn’t on silent, and texts her company that she'll be out until the show tonight.
Then she falls back to sleep.
When she wakes up it's 3 p.m. and David’s sent her a multitude of texts.
The first two are apologies, the third is him telling her that she was right, the kids were going to end up staying with a relative. Sure he traumatized them by killing their mother in front of them but at least they had a home.
The fourth comes an hour later and he shares that when he went to check on the boys to let them know they were going to stay with family for the interim, the one he saved from being shot gave him a hug to thank him. He didn’t have all the details but apparently their mother and husband had discovered meth, pulling away from family and friends in a dangerous spiral and there had been concern for the kids for months. He sends another text that he was now in a bathroom crying after saying goodbye to them with the weight of guilt a bit dispelled, knowing he helped them even if it was just a little. Then another text five minutes later apologizing for oversharing about his sharing that he cried.
When Nina reads these texts she can’t help smiling; David was endearing and sweet and while he had put her on a roller coaster of emotions this was what she missed. Him. Raw and honest, even if he fumbled with what that meant when engaging with her.
She found it cute.
She reads the text after that asks how she’s doing and if she’s okay and she’s just getting a sixth in catching up with the stream of messages.
She reassures him that she’s fine, that she just slept in to make up for the early morning. She reassures him that she was happy to listen anytime he needed, that she appreciates when he shares things with her.
Then she goes silent.
At first, he understands. He does. What he offloaded onto her was heavy and he had done it in the middle of the night with no warning.
When he doesn’t hear from her after three days, he knows he needs to call her. It takes him a day to not be annoyed and pissed about it, to realize that he was the one who needed to contact her first, but he does. She had expressed that she had been hurt, probably disappointed by the way he had abruptly left her life then barged into it, an emotional mess nonetheless.
He Googles what to do in a situation like this because he really had no idea. He knows he could reach out and ask Edward but….he doesn’t want to reach out to Edward. He didn’t want to admit he had no idea what to do even if that was very much true.
Instead, he spends an hour reading multiple articles and blogs from psychiatrists before accidentally stumbling onto a reddit forum. Four hours later he’s disappointed he wasted so much time researching something he knew in his gut all along.
He had to initiate this, not her.
He decides to send her a text. He spends too much time crafting it - emoji or no emoji? Can you text with too many? He barely uses them - decides to stick to one though it feels inappropriate. Maybe no emoji. Does he lead with an apology? Should he apologize over a text? That felt cheap.
What should he write?
He goes out for a coffee, knows the break will help his brain calm down. When he’s back at his desk an hour later, he crafts something simple that feels authentic to him.
David: Good afternoon. I hope you’re well. Are you available to talk on the phone tonight? We never addressed my poor communication skills and I miss you. And I’d rather apologize over a call then through text
He’s spent too much time on this, distracted himself from work so he shifts his attention to a case that’s ended up on his desk. Better that than the fear in his gut that she won’t respond back at all, that it was too late. It takes his stomach rumbling to remind him he should grab a bite, and he allows himself to check his phone.
She’s responded.
Nina: I have a show tonight until 10, and usually get on the road around 10:30. Can you call me then?
David: Yeah, that’s perfect.
David’s grateful for the slower case he's working on, less heavy and simple for all its worth, and he stays at the station until 10:00 pm to make up for the time he’s wasted on his personal life. It’s 10:37 by the time he’s walking into his apartment, takeout cold in his hands.
He settles in the way he was comfortable with, exchanging his button up for a simple T-shirt but keeps his jeans on just in case he gets called back in, and nervously calls Nina.
He’s never felt equal parts excited and terrified at once.
He waits for a beat, the ringing phone all he can focus on before Nina’s voice snaps on the line.
“Hey.”
Her voice is soft, tired and he can hear classical music in the background, the steady sound of the road.
“Hey. Is this still a good time?”
“Yeah. You’ll help me stay awake to get home.”
“Long day?”
“Yeah. Just danced a lot and didn’t drink enough coffee. I’m okay.”
“That’s good. Or not; I’m sorry it was a long day.” he doesn’t know what it is about Nina that makes him fumble his words like an idiot, but he does. The reality was he’s nervous, he knows that he needs to be the one to start this conversation, that he should be able to take initiative but he’s unsure how to. He wasn’t used to having to communicate in this way.
There’s also the fear that she’ll attack him, guilt him for the way he exists and he can’t handle that, not from her.
“Did you have a good day?”
Nina’s voice cuts through his thoughts and he lets out the breath he was holding as he responds,
“It was fine. Slow.”
“That’s good. Slow is good,” she pauses, “So what was it about you wanting to apologize to me?”
Her voice is teasing, he’s grateful for it, grateful to have a break in the dam.
“Yeah. I’m uhhh….I’m sorry about the past few weeks. For disappearing.”
“You did say that you disappear into cases.”
“Yes but it hurt your feelings. So I’m sorry about that. It wasn’t my intention.”
“I know that David.”
He pauses again before he says,
“I’m not used to being held accountable to anyone. I’m not used to communicating to anyone on a consistent basis, but especially when I’m working. It's important that when I’m on a case, I can give my full attention to it. The difference can quite literally be life and death.”
He wasn’t trying to be defensive, but being able to operate the way he does was important to him. He wasn’t willing to change that.
Not even for Nina.
“I want to be clear about something. I’m not asking you to change how you work, how you operate,” she pauses, “Listen, in a few months it’ll be Nutcracker season. It's a super busy time for dancers, but for me it’s going to be nuts because I’m dancing here and in three other states. There'll be weeks where I’m dancing two shows a day, on top of rehearsals for other shows, studio time.”
She exhales, taking a beat before saying,
“I say all this to say I understand your job. I understand the care you put into your job, the dedication. You’re not a good detective because you half ass it.”
David’s grateful that she understands, that she provides a similar perspective from her lens.
He waits for the but.
It never comes.
“What I am asking for, what I would prefer is if you can text me. Not every day and not every hour and we don’t even have to have a back and forth. Just something so that I know that you’re okay. Something so I know that you still care.”
David’s hand tightens around his phone, closing his eyes. When he opens them, its in a series of blinks as he tries to articulate,
“The other reason why I don’t reach out is because…if I’m doing a heavy case, if it's something really, really messed up, I need to have distance. I need to separate from what I care about and focus on the case. If I thought about you for instance, in this last case, I wouldn’t be on. I wouldn’t have been able to figure out where that family was, make choices that were best for my job and for me.”
“Are you saying you need to compartmentalize?"
It's not an accusatory question, he can hear the genuine curiosity in her tone and he nods before huffing out,
“Yes.”
Nina’s silent, and he’s left with the sound of classical music, cars passing by. He worries that maybe this won’t be a good fit, that she doesn’t understand, but then she says,
“I understand that, it actually makes a lot of sense. I’m just trying to think of a compromise,” another beat of silence, “How about this. If you know you’re going into a hard case, you just text me that. Just send - ‘hey, I just got assigned a real tough case and won’t be around for a while. I don’t know how long but just wanted to let you know’. That feels better than you sending a random good morning text, like everything is normal, and then just ghosting me.”
“I wasn’t trying to ghost you though.” David doesn’t mean to snap at her, he really doesn’t but this conversation feels too similar. He knows how this goes, always the same when he dates.
He’s the bad guy and they’re the victim. When really, he just operated differently than most people. Couldn’t understand that his career, his coworkers, that was all he had.
Nina exhales, takes a beat. She’s said the wrong words, hadn’t meant to upset him. She can feel the defensive walls build up around him and she hates that, but also she wanted to express how she felt. She realizes she needs to take another approach.
“I’m not trying to blame you David. I’m sorry, let me try to explain again.”
He knows he’s wound tight, knuckles probably white from gripping the phone. He didn’t want to snap at her, he just didn’t want to feel like he was unable to provide what she wanted.
He was trying. He really wants to try with her in ways he hasn’t with other women he’s dated, but not at the price of him. Nina’s voice cuts through the silence,
“I know you mentioned you get lost in cases and to be fair I know you said you had a hard case and wouldn’t be around before you did disappear. The problem is we never discussed what that actually means. It's new for me to be dating someone who has to disappear so deeply into their work and trust me, this is something I get from men I date. I do understand when you say you need to give all your attention to work David, please know I hear and understand that.
I would just like to align that when you text that you're into a deep or heavy case, it does mean that you will be gone for long stretches of time with limited to no communication. I don’t think I truly understood that so I apologize for not asking for clarification after you communicated to me. That’s on me.”
Now he felt bad. She was taking all the blame when that wasn’t what he wanted. He just wanted her to understand.
“Nina I’m not trying to say that it’s your fault.”
“I know David. I just want you to know I hear you and I can admit that half of this is on me for not knowing how to clarify things.
No one is at fault here. We’re just learning together, right?”
“Right.” He agrees. This felt good. This sits in him differently and he exhales the breath he’s holding.
There was no blame. Just trying to come to an understanding. It wasn’t asking a lot and David could do that.
“May I put in an additional request?” This from Nina and David can't help the tug of his lips despite the emotional roller coaster he was on as he says,
“Yes.”
“After a heavy case if you need to talk like a few nights ago, feel free to call me. Even if you just need me to listen. If you need to get it out, get it out. I don’t care what time of the day or night it is, just call me. The only time I won’t pick up is if I’m on stage or rehearsing but still call me, that way I know to call you back when I’m available.”
“You won’t mind?” He whispers it, afraid of her response but Nina knows he’s fragile, understands the heavy ask she’s putting on him, despite it being in service of him. It was obvious that whoever he’s dated in the past didn’t allow him to be himself, so she’s happy to assure him.
“I don’t mind David. Like I said a few nights ago I will always be here to listen.”
“Okay.”
“Okay,” another beat, “If it's a slow day, like today, but you still wanna text, just communicate that too. I’m not demanding that you speak to me all the time, it just doesn’t feel good when you disappear. I do really miss you.”
She says the last part softly and David closes his eyes again, falling back into his couch, tension leaving his shoulders. It felt so good to hear that from another human being.
It felt good to hear it from her.
“I miss you too. I miss you all the time.” he admits. He wants her to understand that she was important to him.
That he was really willing to try.
“That feels really good to hear David. So tell me that. Also, like I said, I’m busy and have a life too. I’m not going to overwhelm you. Also remember, you can tell me when you need space. I will understand. Boundaries are important no matter how much you care about the person.”
“Okay.”
They sit in silence for a minute. David feels like he’s asking too much of her though he knows she wouldn’t see it that way, and is trying to figure out how to tell her she can also express what works best for her.
That she can be honest with him too. She beats him to it.
“I guess…the reason why I was so upset is because I’m not used to men making me feel safe romantically,” she pauses for a beat, weighing her words. “I’ve had a pretty tough dating history. I tend to date or fall for men who like the idea of me. They like the idea of dating a ballerina, but they don’t want their buddies to know they're dating a half black girl.
I’m used to handsome men like you hiding me in the shadows. I’m a secret, not a prize.”
David’s eyebrows furrow together as he sits up, at full alert.
That was the last thing he wants her to feel.
He wants her to feel like the goddess he saw her as.
“I know that you aren’t like that though David. I know. You have shown me that, time and time again so far. But when you….when you disappeared, it triggered that feeling in me. That I wasn’t good enough. I naturally spiral into myself. I wonder what’s wrong with me. That’s why I was upset.
I’m telling you this because I don’t want this to become a habit in our relationship and then I push you away to protect myself. I don’t want this to end after a few dates. I don’t ever want to entertain the idea of not having you in my life. But I will, if you can’t meet me halfway.”
David’s not used to this. He’s not used to someone close to him maturely articulating their feelings, their wants and their desires with their insecurities. He’s never meant anyone to be so authentically honest in their emotions. He was well aware that he couldn’t even name his wants and desires in a succinct way.
He’s grateful Nina can, that she had the emotional intelligence to share that with him. It makes him feel safe. Outside the panic around that emotion he does. He doesn’t feel attacked. He doesn’t feel blamed. He doesn’t feel like he has to change who he is and how he operates.
He just has to meet her halfway.
She was willing to adapt to the way he operates, so he wants to make sure to do the same. Based on what she was voicing, she needed to feel just as safe as he did. Needed assurances, care.
He was more than half to provide that.
“Thank you for telling me that, for sharing your perspective. On my end, I’ll let you know when I’m going into heavy cases. I’ll try to be a better texter but that might be a longer battle. I…..even with Edward I just don’t really communicate with people a lot personally.”
“That’s okay. Thank you for listening to me and understanding.”
“Of course. But Nina I need to be clear about something,” he has to take a deep breath to organize his thoughts before he lets out, “I don’t know what kind of losers you dated before but you are a prize to me. No, that doesn’t sound right.” He frowns, trying to figure out the right words to express how she makes him feel. How she made him feel tonight, when he met her at the wedding.
“Nina, you’re so special. The flowers I got you, I chose them because outside of their obvious beauty they seemed strong despite the fragility of being a plant. They’re expensive as fuck which I had to learn upon paying.”
Nina laughs, it’s pure and musical to his ears and he smiles, happy to break the tension for once.
“But I will pay to get them for you whenever you want, because you’re worth it and if I can pay something that captures a fraction of who you are, I will. Flowers are expensive but they're just things; you’re priceless. You are…you’re such a rare kind of human to come across. I don’t fucking care that you’re a ballerina or that you’re half black. I just like you. I like that you're beautiful, and witty, and funny, caring, and that you see me. I know I can make it hard but you're willing to try.
I don’t need a prize. I’m not trying to win something to put on a shelf or hang on a wall. I want a partner. I want a companion. Someone who can sit in the dark and laugh in the light. If if I’m lucky, if I don’t fuck this up, hopefully you’ll do me the honor of being that for me. Because fuck do I want to be that for you.”
David wants to be sure that she understands, that it's articulated and clear to her. She’s quiet, he’s back to hearing classical music and the road and he’s worried he’s said too much too soon.
It’s a minute later that he hears her say,
“You know, for someone who doesn’t speak much you are very good with words.”
He can tell that she’s doing that thing she does when he gives her a compliment, face scrunching up even though she’d be beaming, shyness tinging her words. He smiles because he likes that he makes her feel special, seen.
“Consider you my muse.”
“Mon dieu, you’re so corny. But I like it.”
They speak for the remainder of her car ride, until he’s sure she’s safe in her apartment. He likes the way he feels after, that warm feeling that always comes when he thinks about her ever present.
He wanted to feel this way forever.
-✦-
Edward is still in disbelief when David drives up and parks in his driveway on a bright and crisp Saturday afternoon. David has actively come to visit Edward probably five times in their adult life. They mainly met at restaurants, it usually was late at night or early in the morning, and it typically was always for an hour.
David’s only been to Edward’s house once.
When David had called him to say that he was making the commute to Pittsburgh to visit, and if he wanted lunch Edward was sure David was kidding with him.
Except now David has a case of Edwards favorite beer in tow, along with sandwiches he’s picked up, and Edward doesn’t know what to make of it, feels slightly worried. He’s even more worried when he drinks in his friend's attire as he welcomes him into his home. David’s wearing a grey sweater, jeans, no badge or holster.
“You’re off?”
Edward doesn’t mean to sound incredulous, but it was Loki. Since he had known him, he kept himself busy. At Huntington it was school, applying to college, for a short while the small gang they were in. He went to West Point, then the academy, then he became a cop, a detective.
Loki actively worked to stay busy.
Except the man sitting across from him on his couch, handing out sandwiches and accepting a beer was not that. In fact, he felt quite the complete opposite.
“What the fuck happened with you?”
Edward tries to sound teasing, light hearted, but he’s worried. Was David losing it? Has work finally broken him?
David flickers his eyes over to Edward who is watching him, deep concern setting in his brow, fear shadowing his eyes. He’s known his friend long enough to know when he worried about him, and he chuckles as he sits back in his chair and moves to unwrap his sandwich.
“I started taking my weekends off. This weekend happened to fall on the traditional Saturday and Sunday.”
“And you’re okay with that?"
“Fuck no,” David huffs as he looks up at Edward, “Its either take time off or get therapy so I choose the lesser of two evils.”
Edwards nods his head slowly, grabbing his sandwich and unwrapping it. Then he opts to grab his beer instead,
“Okay that's a lot. Why do you need to have therapy?”
David scoffs,
“Beyond the obvious shit we both fight to ignore on a daily basis?,” Edward chuckles and nods as David continues, “I work too many hours and solve too many cases and my boss is worried about burnout.”
“I mean, you do work a lot,” David rolls his eyes as Edward shrugs, “and I do think that it's good to have time off, but I’m the lazy one out of the two of us.”
David rolls his eyes even deeper because Edward had gone to college, law school, and needed to fill up his schedule as much as he did. Edward continues,
“How are you feeling about it?”
“Antsy. Useless. Bored.”
“You working out?”
“I can only work out so much.”
“You….picking up a hobby?”
“I started reading again.”
Edwards raises a brow. David stopped reading for pleasure once he had started pursuing becoming a detective. What has changed?
David answers his question with a shrug,
“Nina suggested it.”
There it was. Bianca had been probing him about David since the ghosting incident, but David and him didn’t really talk in the ways she wanted answers. He was curious too, David hadn’t really had a serious relationship……ever, at least as far as Edward knew. He dated occasionally, rarely, but he usually dated women he knew he didn’t have to commit to.
Edward had never seen him the way he was with Nina.
“How are you and Nina?”
Edward knows David was like a cat, the wrong question would cause him to shut down and run off and so he tries to tread lightly.
“We’re good. I think. We had our first fight. I think.”
“You mean about you ghosting her?”
David shoots his eyes over to Edward who raises a hand,
“You’re dating my wife's best friend. Of course I know.”
David gives an annoyed sigh and murmurs,
“That doesn’t feel great.”
“If it makes it any better, Nina’s a great voice of reason.”
David considers this, considers the conversation they had a few nights back and gives a small smile,
“I can actually see that. We had a good conversation about my communication.”
Edward can’t help the laugh that barrels out of him and David grabs his beer, taking a sip. He figured Edward would find that amusing. When Edward calms down he lets out,
“You’re lacking thereof I assume.”
“You assumed correctly.”
“It go well?”
“Yes. We talked, found compromise and it feels good. And fair. For both of us.”
“Look at you. You guys officially dating yet?”
David frowns, shaking his head,
“No. I think we need a few more dates before I can ask her that.”
Edwards pauses a beat, trying to figure out the best way to frame what he wants to ask next,
“You open to being in a serious relationship? Nina isn’t the type of woman you take on a few dates and move on from. She’s the real deal.”
David knows what Edward is really trying to ask. Edward has known him his whole life, he used to make it very clear he wanted to stay single. He wasn’t sure how much Edward believed that had changed, but he could understand his skepticism now.
“I would be open to being in a serious relationship with Nina. If she wanted to be in one with me.”
“Nina would be a nice partner for you. She’s levelheaded, reasonable. Kind, patient. She enjoys alone time just as much as you so you’d be able to breathe now and then. Also, she has her own life. And she’s blowing up so she’ll probably be with a job for a while.”
David ingests this information and then says,
“Speaking of, can I ask a favor of you?”
“Anything for you Loki.”
“I want to do something nice for her, Nina. I have an idea but I was wondering if I could learn more about her likes based on what she posts on her Instagram. She mentioned how she posts and shares personal things on it so I was hoping to learn a thing or two. The problem is I’d have to sign up to see more of her account and…..I’d rather not.”
Edward smiles, liking where this was going. He liked playing detective, especially because it meant he could support his brother in falling in love.
He knew for David, even asking Edward for help was a big deal.
“David, you came to the right place.”
______________________________________
All content was written originally by me; please do not repost, use, or market as your own work.
