#david schnarch

[therapeuticmonologues]

The person with the least desire for intimacy always controls intimacy in the relationship as long as partners are dependent on validation from each other.

David Schnarch, Passionate Marriage

[odettecarotte]

Did he tho

[oldquotes]

'Our mistakes and regrets are not barriers to becoming who we can be; they are a necessary ingredient.' -David Schnarch | See more daily motivational quotes at Jar of Quotes.

[therapeuticmonologues]

[therapeuticmonologues]

The problem is not the loss of respect per se;  it's that we don't say it. When you won't say "I don't respect you," there's a further loss of respect for yourself and your partner.

David Schnarch, Passionate Marriage

WORD!

[therapeuticmonologues]

When you think your marriage may be over, you're finally more likely to speak your personal truth. Paradoxically, once you're willing to say the important things you thought would ruin your marriage, it often saves it. At critical mass partners treat each other (and themselves) respectfully, conveying the belief that they are both resilient enough to handle the truth. Signs of contempt -- such as insults, facial expressions of disinterest and dismissal, and eye-rolling -- all stop.

David Schnarch, Passionate Marriage

[therapeuticmonologues]

We often feel afraid to say things that might affect our marriage, and in our fear we withhold information. Then we look with disrespect upon our partner, who we assume couldn't handle will be here today! The best sex and intimacy and marriage often come out of mutual respect. Respect is a bond of the highest order.

David Schnarch, Passionate Marriage

[therapeuticmonologues]

Empathy for your partner means giving him something solid to confront -- a clear picture of yourself -- so that he can make informed choices.... Empathy is no excuse for withholding necessary information before excoriating your partner with the truth.

David Schnarch, Passionate Marriage