IT'S DARKWING TIME! WHO READY TO DARKWING
ok i already hate him on all the covers (said gleefully). cover c actually eats so hard thanks gamer jake myler and gamer james silvani
wow it's megavolt that's so beautiful.
guess darkwing duck vanished and died that's so sad series over
sorry im like really not feeling well at the time of typing most of this which, what's new, but also im not feeling coherent. i spent the last five days being repeatedly overheated and i have multiple disorders that make that really bad so i've been nauseous and on the verge of passing out for the majority of my waking hours but it was worth it. it was worth it because i got to see horses. named aaron and ammon. if you know anything about the book of mormon like drake mallard does you know this is the SICKEST THING EVER. i'm not in my right mind please excuse me
but long story short if you're unfamiliar with these comics, this first installment is mostly setting the stage for the upcoming conflicts. st canard is now a company town and drake owes his soul to the company store (which is probably why st peter couldn't let him into heaven in that episode where he died). robot cops patrol the street and no one needs to fight crime anymore. or cause crime, because megavolt himself THAT'S RIGHT the one and only elmo sputterspark is working in the same lame cubicle as drake.
drake's office looks claustrophobic as hell
just thought something really mean.
he's in the same outfit but he's wearing a tie. hey guys it's me caoimhin who you can always count on for stunning and original details from duck comics
"oh damn quackwerks got rid of cops... maybe it's not so bad after all KIDDING THEY STILL SUCK" me after reading this
interrupted in the middle of massive work meeting to go talk to my daughter's principal again!
St. Canard School For Kids With The Kind Of ADHD That Makes Them Set Things On Fire. that's the school gosalyn has been sent to. and he has to work his stupid real life job to pay for tuition. we're gonna get more gosalyn updates in the next chapter
damn lol it lowkey sounds like you... maybe... idk... regret your actions and miss your partner? maybe we're wallowing in regret? maybe we wish we had made different choices but we can't? fascinatinNO WAY MEGAVOLT SIGHTING
megavolt is here and he looks like a poptropica character.
drake knowing he's working with megavolt and just not giving a fuck is funny as hell im crying
congratulations to the writers on nailing megavolt's tone and pacing perfectly in comic form 10/10
the next couple of pages are kind of the darkwing comic equivalent of watching dead wife montages except they're Launchpad Left Me montages and they're just in his head while he works his stupid 9-5
listening i'm not saying friends can't miss each other really bad but this comic is gay as hell. calling him just to hear his voice MY WORD
rip megavolt who just got kidnapped off the street btw! by some sort of plant tendril! who could that possibly be!
HELP I FUCKING FORGOT THEY ARREST HONKER AGAIN
do you think gosalyn asks darkwing to come back at every minor inconvenience. she can't finish a math problem and she's like "but maybe DARKWING DUCK COULD" and he's like ok nice try
okay so anyway honker has been arrested by the cop robots (and NOT the hot and charming kind like lyla lay and geena gay and sharon. i'm upset too) over illegally downloading a hannah montana song. this is bad and i guess will be the catalyst for darkwing coming back, cus he's gotta break our boy honker outta JAIL! or not. maybe drake mallard is the new hero and he's just gonna run around fighting crime with pencils.
hold on-- what's this? i'm getting word we're switching to camera nine (pkna reference) where we are going to be given a megavolt update. please stand by
and with that we see that the alleged mastermind behind it all (and by it all i mean the singular problem of megavolt getting kidnapped) is QUACKERJACK. who could have possibly seen this coming.
ok while im here i have a couple of confessions. one i haven't read those other darkwing comics where quackerjack features prominently and like has a girlfriend or something. two i dont like stories where quackerjack is too serious. i know that's a crazy thing to say about a guy who tried to execute gosalyn via firing squad but he's a silly guy ok he's in it for the love of the game. him getting a little too into it and going off the fucking rails should be compelling for me but it's just... not? unless it is. i'll be frank with you i haven't decided. my personal take on the fearsome four is that they all suck and are goofballs (liquidator lowkey dgaf, bushroot is depressed and lame lal the time, megavolt is megavolt, quackerjack is like if a bouncy castle wanted to kill you) and so if you take negaduck out of the situation they're directionless and i'd argue they're not really going to have a leader. that's my personal ideal F4; i think they need an outside force corralling them to make them a legitimate threat narrative-wise.
which, perhaps, they do have.... perhaps there's someone else pulling the strings from backstage.... but you'll have to read the next one to find out!
song assignment for this week