#dead easy

[hillbroski]

Boy why are you so shapes

[diabolikdiabolik]

Dead Easy (1982)

[ask-de-writer]

DEAD EASY (1 Part) : MLP Fan Fiction : Tales to Read AFTER the Lights Are OUT!

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DEAD EASY

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

1011 words

© 2017 by Glen Ten-Eyck

Writing begun 10/09/17

All rights reserved.  This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

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Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They may reblog the story provided that all author and copyright information remains intact.  They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions.

All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.

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This Nightmare Night had been brisk but not too busy.  The famous Sweet Spot foal bowl was nearly half gone.  The little cream colored unicorn who ran the place was cheerful as he counted up the day's earnings.  In spite of all the treats that Roe had given out, the day was still a profitable one.

There had been the usual early rush of ponies getting last minute foal treats for parties or to hand out when evening brought out the youngsters in costumes, chanting the traditional Nightmare Night chant.

The door bells chimed on their spring as the door opened to admit three ponies that he was especially waiting for.  The magenta mare, Molly, who, despite the Vampony costume, had a wedding bracelet on her left foreleg that was identical to the one on Roe's left foreleg.  Her foals, Sis, a small mare in a Thestral costume, who did not like her full name of Sisterca, and Mort, in a wolf costume, was getting big for his age, gamboled into the shop!

Since last Hearthwarming, they were his family.  They had taken him to their hearts, knowing exactly who, and more importantly, WHAT he was. He had taken them into his heart too.  Being aware of what could happen, they had wished that he not grant them any more wishes.

They ran a prosperous woodlot and Roe ran his famous store, the SWEET SPOT.  They still maintained separate businesses during the day. After closing, they became a happy family.

Mort, ever eager, demanded, “Did they really come?  Are we going to have a Nightmare Night party with them?”

Molly expertly corralled her offspring and reminded him, “Say the chant! That is house rules in the Sweet Spot!”

The three of them chanted sweetly, “Nightmare Night!  What a fright! Give us something sweet to bite!”

Roe indulgently hoofed over the big Foal Bowl and they all chose favorite sweets.  He told Mort, “To answer your most eager question, YES. They came.  They are all waiting in the back for you to show up.  The party will start as soon as I close up the shop!”

The spring bells jangled harshly as the door was shoved open by a red unicorn!  He demanded, “Just hoof over your cash!  While you are at it, gimme the damn foal bowl, too!”

I looked up and retorted, “NO, Ferd Foul!  I know you and you can't get away with this!”

Ferd's magic grabbed Molly, my wife!!  Mort and Sis, sprinted towards the door!  He was gloating, “Right, you little asses!  Get out while you can . . .”  He never finished his insult.  Sis grabbed one forehoof and Mort a hind one.  They both pulled at once!  Ferd hit the floor like a tonne of rotten potatoes!  Jolted, he released my Molly!  Instead of running, she sat on his neck, holding him down flat!

My own magic was gripping his horn, preventing him from using it. Tightly, I told him, “Ferd, if you wanted money from Easy Street, robbing THIS place is the wrong way to get it!

“Why didn't you just check the Equestrian Lottery poster to see if that ticket you bought from me two days ago won something?”

Humiliated at being taken down by foals, Ferd snorted, “I wish!  That would be dead easy money!”

I spoke far too mildly, “Say that wish again, Ferd, ol' pony?”

He thoughtlessly replied, “I wish the Lottery would give me dead easy money!”

I saw Sis put a hoof to her mouth as she realized what was happening.

Molly figured it out too.  She got off his neck after I nodded to her.

Growling at all of us, Ferd rummaged in his saddlebag and pulled out a rumpled lottery ticket.  As he compared it to the Lottery poster, his eyes bugged out!

“I done WON!  Dead easy money!”

A lovely pale gray mare put her head through the door to my living quarters in the back.  She gave Ferd a measuring look and then politely asked, “Did I hear somepony say DEAD easy?”

Ferd was chuckling as he held up the ticket!  I won!  I am rich and it was dead easy!  Don't gotta rob Roe for easy money now!”

The mare seemed to be sort of settling herself.  Her lunge across the shop was like lightning!  She gripped Ferd about the neck and her big snake-like tail that started where her hindquarters should be, pulled into the shop, whipping about him and squeezing!

Two ponies stopped at the door until I invited, “Come on in, the more the merrier!”

Both Vamprilla and Charley leaped into the room!  Exerting the great strength of the vampire, they picked up both the lamia and Ferd, carrying them both into the back!

As they did, Vamprilla suggested, “Don't kill him yet, Flowering Ash. It is far easier to drink from one whose heart is still beating!  He will make great refreshments for the party!”

Mort and Sis were both watching with eyes like saucers!  Sis broke the silence.  “Wow!  Dad, you have some really neat friends!”

That made me feel really good.  Their birth father was killed when a cart wheel broke and it rolled over on him.

Molly was just a tad green around the gills, as they say, but gamely pointed out, “Let's go on in, they are holding up the party for us!”

Not being one to avoid a good party, I picked up the ticket that Ferd had dropped and put it in my saddle bag before going into the back.  As I passed through the door to the party, where all illusions were dispelled, my two branching antlers appeared, my coat went to a nice tan with some white spots and my hooves became the split hooves of a wish granting roe deer.

It was great to see the small zombies from the orphan's corner of the graveyard having fun playing with Mort and Sis.

I think that some would call my guests monsters.  Not me.  Not my really wonderful family.

~THE END~

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