Discover Top Posts Tagged with #deadpan stormborn

Who would win in a fight

Deadpan Stormborn, Queen of Wooden Acting, Mother of CGI Dragons, Insert 600 More Titles, with her 3 dragons and army and St. Tyrion

one (1) Warden, slayer of 3 high dragons (one of which was the fuckin Archdemon and another an elven goddess in disguise) , their assassin BFF who can’t open locks, their possessed mage grandma who knits, and their sassy golem BFF who is on a crusade against pigeons

#deadpan stormborn #the warden #dragon age origins

Unabashed Book Snobbery Podcast #23, Simplified Bay of Dragons Part 2: Analysis

Julia and I close our their planning for the Simplified Bay of Dragons retrospective with heavy analysis of Deadpan and Saint Tyrion's arcs, featuring "so she didn't burn down any damn patriarchy!" and other hits.

Listen to it here (the mp3 direct link is being stupid...you have to first click on "show all” in the Download Options box, and then click on the one with .mp3 in the file name), or subscribe/listen on iTunes (it’s already updated in the Podcast app, if not on the site yet). It’s also in our RSS feed.

My butchery of Ramin Djawadi’s music continues with these saltarellos (new outro)

Episode Breakdown:

0:00 - Introduction & Deadpan's arc

32:27 - Tyrion's arc

53:23 - Deadpan's return to Meereen discussion

1:10:45 - Checklist or Asspull?

Related Links:

Simplified Bay of Dragons Retrospective Series: Part 1 (recap); Part 2 (Daenerys); Part 3 (Tyrion)

How much time has passed on GoT?

Deadpan’s Bestest Nameday Gift Part 1; Part 2 / podcast

Why Dany’s Season 5 “big moment” was unearned (late-S5)

For all other UBS Podcast episodes, click here

#simplified bay #deadpan stormborn #saint tyrion #got meta #antigot #podcast

why do you call dany deadpan? do you not like emilia or? (sorry it's just that dany is my fav and, while i don't think she's perfect, i get a bit defensive of her since so many people seem to hate her [and then project their hate onto emilia])

Well I mean the Dany of the show is written like a completely inconsistent mess who was infantilized to the nth degree this season. So when you say “I don’t think she’s perfect” or “she’s my fav” it’s hard for me to tell if you’re talking about the show or the books. I rather like the Dany of the books, and wrote about GoT’s disservice to her character on a few (#3) occasions (parts 2 & 3). I totally agree that she gets an unfair amount of shit in the ASOIAF fandom.

But if you mean the Dany of the show…I’m sorry to say I have no clue what it is you like about her:

…Daenerys Targaryen’s characterization was entirely absent. The willingness to compromise, the pragmatism, the utilitarianism, the high amounts of compassion…just totally absent. This was only made far worse by the fact that the situation [on the show] was so simplistic. Deadpan did not have to consider murdering child-hostages to whom she had grown close. She didn’t have to contend with the Astapori refugee crisis, or the bloody flux showing up at her doorstep. She didn’t have to deal with the temptation of the Dornish alliance. There was no army marching to squash Meereen, and the enemies within her walls were, frankly, clear-cut.

Yet how she navigated through this dumbed-down plotline was mystifying. She looked like an erratic idiot, literally going from one extreme stance to the opposite within a single episode. And this happened more than once. Deadpan also was a completely ineffective leader; the Strawmen hated her no matter what, and slavery still clearly existed 20 feet from her city thanks to a minimum wage loophole. For the character who is the face of “female empowerment” in television, we really can’t believe how people miss that her scripting is ridiculously infantilizing. Frankly, it’s rather offensive that anyone considers this character “feminist.”

Like, how is she” badass”? Because she kills people and says everything in a tone of absolute, pig-headed certainty? Unless there’s a man there to talk her out of it. Or is it because she makes the empowering realization that she, the empowered ruler, will let the Strawmen kill her, empowerdly? Nevermind that she was a goddamn damsel in distress for the entire scene, only to be spirited off to another location where she then…wait for it…found herself in need of rescue once more.

We really hate Deadpan. She’s a major asshole, and we can’t for the life of us figure out why the audience has gravitated towards her. Or like…how anyone in-verse would follow her too? She clearly can’t form a coherent strategy, even in the short-term. And the characters who actually could give her valuable feedback just end up looking daft for their stanning of her. (x)

As for why we call her “Deadpan,” whoever is her director somehow mistook lacking the ability to emote with “regalness” or “empowerment.” She delivers every line in monotone and shows an expression on her face maybe once in every 12 scenes.

I don’t think this is the best reflection of who Emilia Clarke is as an actor, just like we all know Padme-wooden-Amidala is not all that Natalie Portman is capable of. Ditto for Keisha Castle-Hughes and her “I smell poo” face of this seaosn.

Plus Deadpan’s scripting is really not doing Clarke any favors either. But go listen to that “I’m going to break the wheel” speech and tell me with a straight face that this moniker is inappropriate.

It actually makes me miss the good ol’ days:

#deadpan stormborn #khaleesi of faux-empowerment #queen of the anachronisms and the clichéd #breaker of suspended disbelief #Anonymous #asks

COMING NEXT WEEK, ON A WEBSITE NEAR YOU!

No seriously, get hype. We’re going to post it in two parts because boy is this one involved. Part 1: “What Story were they trying to tell” will be dropping in a few days.

#deadpan's greatest nameday gift #deadpan stormborn #saint tyrion #julia and i are pretty happy with the shocking revelations from this one

Jonny Cardboard got me thinking: Daenerys Card-born?

Deadpan Card-born, the Unemotional, Queen of Simplified Bay, Queen of the Anachronisms and the Clichéd, Khaleesi of Faux-Empowerment, Breaker of Suspended Disbelief, and part-time Mother of Dragons.

#deadpan stormborn #daenerys targaryen #dany #Deadpan Cardstock also works #Anonymous #asks

If ShowJorah's only crime is sending letters to Varys, and Varys has totally been on Dany's side for totes forever (even though he sent the order to kill her while she was married to Drogo) does this retroactively make Jorah even more of a dogged Nice Guy?

The Varys Marx retcon is a major issue. There’s actually a common honeypot that Varys and Jorah were both always working to protect Deadpan Stormborn, and the assassination attempt was just Varys’s way of gaining credibility in the Small Council, but then he also warned Jorah to stop it.

But…we know that this is untrue because Jorah received a letter pardoning him for his crimes 3 seconds before he stopped the attempt. And the only reason he realized she was about to get poisoned is because he got that pardon (he’d wouldn’t be needed as a spy anymore). Also Varys is the one keeping the Small Council appraised of what happens, so he could have just pretended he sent assassins that were thwarted rather than actually risk it. But he didn’t, because he legit tried to kill Deadpan. Because Varys Marx, the Targ supporter was invented for this year, when they creatively decided to cut the Griffs.

Still, sometimes I like to try and honeypot for D&D. Not because I think the narrative actually makes sense, but because I like for people to see how contorted logic must become for it to work.

So…here we go!!!

Varys Marx asked Jorah to spy on Dany…to protect her. But he couldn’t let Jorah think that’s what was happening, because Jorah the Good Guy Knight would never work for a spymaster like Varys. Jorah probably believed he’d have to prove his loyalty to the Barathister regime to earn himself a pardon, so letting him think that was spying on Dany for her enemies seems more believably like something that could end in a pardon.

But Varys Marx also is so smart that he knew Good Guy Jorah would not stand for the murder of an innocent 13 18-year-old. So he had that random little kid deliver the pardon (and say what it was for some reason…I guess Varys Marx likes to keep his birds informed in this universe) knowing an astute knight like Jorah would become suspicious of the timing. Then as a fail-safe, Varys gave the wine merchant/assassin fake poison, but convinced him it was real. Deadpan was never in any true danger, and Varys also got to test if Jorah would be a useful asset for her in one fell swoop.

See how easy it is to work this out if you just use a little creativity!

I guess what I’m saying is, even with the most wild honeypots, Jorah firmly believed his spying was him working against Deadpan’s interest, even if the man he was spying for was secretly “always on her side” (/eyeroll). So it doesn’t really lesson his crimes against her. But Deadpan is, of course, an unfeeling bitch because he’s clearly contrite and begging forgiveness (on multiple occasions) and she won’t hear it (not to mention Show!Jorah does not force sexual contact with her).

Which is quite the tonal difference from Book!Jorah telling Dany that she owes him forgiveness because he loves her and fought for her. But I guess at least she finally realized his worth when she was turned into a damsel in distress.

Oh and it’s strongly implied that Show!Jorah stopped spying after getting that royal pardon (why would he continue?), unlike Book!Jorah who made a report from Qarth.

So yeah, you’re right…even the spying was whitewashed. What a Good Guy™.