#deanandrory

[whereyouleadiwillfollow]

Dean and Coercion: Gilmore Girls

I know Rory's relationships are the main source of debate in this show, and because none is officially her final and best (which I love, by the way, but that's a topic for another time), I don't like antagonizing people with a certain opinion. However, I personally cannot stand Dean, and the main reason for that is because I think that he is a shitty boyfriend, not the dreamy, perfect boyfriend Rory and Lorelai make him out to be in their heads. Let me explain. In the first half of the first season, I think he is adorable. The bracelet and the car (what kind of boyfriend makes you a car?!) are just two examples of how perfect he seems to be. He, as Lorelai says, is the perfect first boyfriend for Rory because of how sweet he is to her. But the thing is, he is, beyond the surface level things he does, kind of a jerk. Some of the main complaints about Dean are his jealousy (which is completely ridiculous, I agree: his lack of trust in Rory around not one but two guys leads her to worry constantly about telling him things, like the fact that she lost his bracelet, which is not healthy in a relationship) and the fact that he is not a good fit for her (which I agree with as well, and props to Dean for figuring that one out before Rory herself did). But the main thing I'm thinking of is the "I love you" plot. I cannot look past the way he acted in the first season when he said that he loved Rory. When she didn't say it back, he completely lost it on her and even, despite loving her, breaks up with her. I understand that he was hurt and wanted her to love him back. But the thing is he punishes her because she does not want to take a certain step in their relationship. Huh. Sounds like another plot point. When Jess and Rory go up to the room at the party and Rory thinks he's mad at her for not wanting to have sex (which he isn't, by the way, in my personal opinion), Lorelai rants about how he was a jerk if he was mad that she didn't want to have sex with him. Isn't what Dean did a little like forcing sex? I mean, isn't he punishing her for not taking a step in a relationship that he is ready for? I mean, sure, taking one step is different from taking the other, but I honestly think that Rory didn't really love Dean and just thought she did because she felt like she needed to. Because she wanted to be with him, and Dean wouldn't be with her unless she said it, she did, not considering if she actually did love him. And the second that Rory says she loves Dean, he comes back to her. Isn't it odd that he says he loves her, which implies some sort of consideration and leniency towards her, but doesn't want to be with her if she doesn't feel the same way? The only thing keeping them apart is this. Why does he allow it? Is her saying it back that important? More important than being together? As Luke's self help book says, he's using his love as a bargaining tool, not giving it unless she says "I love you," which, in my opinion, is just as bad as using his love as a bargaining tool for sex. It's a lot more subtle, so I think it's not generally looked on as abusive, but I think it's just as bad and shows that Dean isn't as perfect as people think.

[whereyouleadiwillfollow]

Season 1, Episode 7: Kiss and Tell

SUMMARY:

Rory’s first kiss: it’s probably the sweetest thing I have ever seen (and Dean is smooth little shit). However, because Rory never told Lorelai about Dean in the first place, she cannot go gush to her mom the way that she goes to Lane. Which is a shame because Mrs. Kim, who overhears Rory telling Lane about the grocery aisle kiss, is the one who tells Lorelai about the kiss.

Eventually, Lorelai cracks and tells Rory that she knows. While things are a little tense, Lorelai is excited and invites Dean, much to Rory’s distress, to movie night. Though the town makes a big deal out of it and embarrasses Rory, things turn out well for them. Lorelai debriefs Dean (who is a little rude about the rules that she sets in place, but is still rational and obviously cares for Rory and has no intent of hurting her) and the episode ends with Lorelai and Rory gushing over the kiss, an adorable way to end the episode and, if it’s humanly possible, bringing them even closer together.

QUOTES:

1. RORY: Thank you

2. LUKE: You and Rory are a lot alike. It makes sense that you would have similar tastes in men.

#LukeandLorelaiaremeanttobesoJessandRoryaremeanttobe

3. RORY: Why don’t you just set up a camera and broadcast it all over the internet?

LORELAI: ‘Cause I don’t think that big!

4. LORELAI: So wait, he kissed you and you said, “Thank you”?

RORY: Yes!

LORELAI: Well, that was very polite!

5. LORELAI: I’m afraid once your heart is involved, it all comes out in moron.

REVIEW:

This episode has it all: drama, humor, and some good Rory and Lorelai bonding. I think that Dean is really nice and this inception of their official relationship is really well done. It makes sense that they would last so long (as they are just so steady together...which comes at the expense of their chemistry). 

But I just want to talk about my hashtag above. I know I’m trying to be unbiased about Rory’s relationship because of the controversy that surrounds it. But I just think that it would be nice...it’s poetic that Rory and Lorelai would be interested in two guys cut from the same cloth: kind of taciturn, rough around the edges guys who would do anything for those they love and who know the Gilmore girls better than they know themselves.

Though Jess could really work on being there steadily like Luke has, he was young! He was his worst self when he and Rory were dating, but after they broke up and when they saw each other in the sixth season, they brought out the best in each other and that was clear (Rory brought out Jess’s potential success and Jess brought her back to her path when Logan couldn’t).

So I think that this line in this episode is a nice piece of foreshadowing...but that is, of course, open to interpretation. And the way that Logan and Christopher are similar shows that Rory could work with Logan and the analogy between Dean and Christopher in this episode shows that even Dean could work too.

So, sorry for the spoilers and the anachronisms, but I just wanted to write my thoughts down before I forgot... 

[whereyouleadiwillfollow]

Season 1, Episode 5: Cinnamon’s Wake

SUMMARY:

Max and Lorelai are now officially starting. They, after meeting again at the Bake Sale, get coffee and then plan for an official date which comes to a screeching halt, much to the dismay of Max (His ”I’m heartbroken” line is probably the sexiest thing I have ever heard), because of Babette’s cat’s death. However, there is the promise of a future date...

In addition to the new man in Lorelai’s life, this episode reintroduced Dean. The infamous (at least to me). 

Okay, to be fair, he is REALLY SWEET in this episode. I mean...

DEAN: Well I’ve been kind of bugging you lately. I thought, I don’t know, I thought you maybe liked me but it’s obvious you’re not interested so I just wanted to say that I get it and I’m not gonna bother you anymore. [turns to leave]

He is a really good first boyfriend, and he is really sweet to Rory. However, drama ensues when Rory doesn’t tell Lorelai and yet Lorelai sees her with Dean from the window.

QUOTES:

1. LORELAI: Tasty and flame-retardant

2. MAX: You like coffee?

LORELAI: Only with my Oxygen.

3. LANE: Did you laugh?

(Rory shakes her head)

LANE: Did you want to?

(Rory nods)

4. DEAN: Hey, do you have a second?

RORY: No...I have gum!

DEAN: No, thanks.

5. BABETTE: I never thought a man would ever even want me.

LORELAI: I know the feeling.

BABETTE: Oh, please, with that ass? Gimme a break.

LORELAI: I mean want me for more than my ass.

REVIEW:

I am starting to sound like a broken record when I say that I adore this episode and this show. I mean, I have dedicated an entire blog to it, so I guess that’s obvious, but still, I feel boring. 

But I think that this episode encapsulates so much that I love about Gilmore Girls. It’s starting to build on the basic relationships and branch out. While neither the Max relationship or the Dean relationship is my favorite (in fact, Dean turns out to be one of my least favorites), these beginnings tug on my heartstrings. 

I mean, I think that there is nothing more endearing than the way that Rory acts around Dean. I honestly feel like she’s my spirit animal when I see her acting like that. It’s how everyone feels and...it conveys the awkwardness of a first relationship perfectly. 

And it contrasts in a fascinating way with the way that Lorelai handles herself. There’s a similarity between the two situations but Lorelai is just so smooth and seems to embrace the awkwardness that she is and that she is feeling. She is really my role model sometimes. And the fact that these relationships create wedges between the two (which eventually are resolved and bring the two closer together than ever) is really interesting, considering their dynamic.