deanmachine replied to your post:My nana died last sunday as we were coming back...
Sometimes I have to remind myself that she's actually dead.
When I found out I was on a literal comedown from a bad freakout I had on the coach back from Amsterdam where I'd had like 3 space cakes as well
And the boat was fucking rocky as fuck too, it was a surreal experience
Especially because she was like, totally fine like 2 days before. I was the last person out of my family that saw her alive and I had to rush away from her hospital bed in order to get the ferry over to Amsterdam
But apparently her condition suddenly declined the day after and she flat out denied to be helped by anyone of the nurses or doctors. My parents were away in the Lake District and Daniel is still in Leeds too. I think she just saw a window to leave without a fuss, and took it
She was the most mentally strong and independent old person I had ever met. Even after she broke her leg the first time, she didn't want anyone to help her, then she broke her other hip and couldn't cope with the fact that her 'life' was simply over. She would never have things her own way ever again.
And I just find that the most difficult thing to accept about all of it. How someone can just make that decision. But I suppose you never really know unless you're truly faced with it, and she was.
