#dear future rib

[maleke-dande]

nyanuyagirl

replied to your post“nyanuyagirl replied to your post“i am nearly 26 years old and i’ve...”

im not sure. tbh, most of what i know comes from childhood so like :/ idk, read aboriginal lit, watch movies, listen to music. see if there is something on at a community centre or something which aims to educate + is run by black folk?

i might!

[maleke-dande]

betterversion--ofme answered your question“yo gimme some music rec please? i’m really liking epic, hi-production...”

You ever heard Salome MC? She doesn't tick all those boxes but you might like

i'll give it a shot, thanks! <3

moar rex plz.

[maleke-dande]

oh! oh! i totally forgot to tell anyone!

i felt pretty okay with myself for the last week. idk, i think i just started hanging out with nature and more people and getting creative... letting myself expand a bit and taking some time off to relax...

then one day i got to midday and was like "hold on... am i... okay with myself?"

idk mindfuless helps. i'm starting to think that maybe i don't need to love myself or find unconditional worth in myself. i just need to nurture and soothe myself, invite pleasant experiences into my attention, and let myself quietly and happily expand and explore the world. i need to fill my life with love.

it's a working hypothesis. i'll stick with it until i figure out something else.

[maleke-dande]

Hey! The bookworm podcast recently interviewed a poet from Iran, I think you would like the interview.

THANK YOU. <3

[maleke-dande]

felixhippo replied to your post“lol i joke about this with friends but i seriously run this scenario...”

you are fucking amazing.

lol thanks? my daydreams can get pretty detailed sometimes.

  politicaldilettante replied to your post“probz om shanti om. seems super familiar and that’s one of the only...”

It's Kabhie Khushi Kabhie Gham :)

ah! thanks! i'll watch it!

[maleke-dande]

maybe I need to make my standards and my boundaries more complex.

so like, higher standards for people who're closer to me, and several boundaries around me that allow people to be at an appropriate distance until I decide i'm okay with having them closer to me.

perhaps every person in the world has their optimum relational distance to me, and the perfect set of boundaries within which they exist. for instance, jesse's racist stepdad optimally exists 597634508751 km away from me, whereas jesse himself optimally exists quite close to me. literally the only standards I expect from jesse's stepdad is to literally never talk to or go near me. but I have a lot of complex and dynamic standards I expect from jesse.

and maybe, if the average person is truly a toxic wanker i'd probably rather not talk to, then they can go in the Total-Fucking-Stranger Zone. all I expect from total fucking strangers is to not bother me while i'm going about my business. that's a pretty low standard, right? I probably won't suffer lots of disappointment from expecting it.

maybe that'll work. i'll do that! maybe i'll finally achieve equilibrium and balance in the world!

[maleke-dande]

diies-iraae replied to your post“diies-iraae replied to your post“if you’re all interested in listening...”

Hmmm I'm not too sure about albums but songs wise there's Soosan Khanoom (gr9 video), Oon Manam, Baba To Ki Hasti, Az Haramsara Ta Amsterdam are a few of my faves

haaaaaah nice! thanks for the rec. ^_^

[maleke-dande]

i'm struggling with things

things i'm struggling with:

> i'm learning to protect my own peace. sometimes this involves avoiding sj arguments. how do i know when i'm "protecting my own peace" versus "being a chickenshit"?

> should humans work towards unconditional self-worth/self-acceptance? if they should, how do i reconcile this with the fact that some people are just worthless pieces of shit? if they shouldn't, well, i've noticed that a stable sense of self-worth is required for good mental health. how do i maintain a stable sense of self-worth if it is unwise to think of it as unconditional?