Dear Guildenstern, School, school and more school,
So school is back in full swing, craziness ensues... It's so strange how easy it is to fall back into the same patterns of life. It's almost like they erase the time in between, or at least distance it. It is wonderful being back and also stressful in a lot of ways. Of course the daunting work load will forever loom over my head (or at least for the next year) but there's a overwhelming satisfaction of stepping into the playhouse and being totally present in what you're doing/creating. The anxiety that comes back hits hard though, I'll never forget when you said to me "when school starts you start to apologize more" and that's completely true. Second guessing, feeling inadequate, constantly comparing myself to others and there achievements is just something that naturally comes with the pressures of school, and life for that matter. However, the difference this year is that I've learned to control it, I can check that at the door more easily now, not with everything of course, this kind of thing is a life long struggle, but for certain classes, and at certain times I'm free, and that's fantastic. What I'm trying to say is that amongst the stress ball of crap that is life, it is reassuring to know that there are moments of stillness and fulfillment to enjoy and discover. P.S. My song of the day Carousel by Melanie Martinez, you'll recognize it from the AHS Freakshow promo vid