“I hope that if alternate universes exist, it will still be you and me in the end. I hope that there will always be an us. In every world, in every story.” (x)
❝ They were a motley collection; a mixture of the weak seeking protection, the ambitious seeking some shared glory, and the thuggish gravitating toward a leader who could show them more refined forms of cruelty. ❞
Death Eaters is a group of dark wizards, followers of Lord Voldemort, who fought as elite fighters in the First and Second Magic Wars. Dreadful? No, not at all! Especially when you are the future wife of one of them. How to handle this? An exclusive report by word of mouth of a young bride of one of the Death Eaters.
To Marry a Death Eater
When it comes to the fact that mama and papa want to engage you with one of the Death Eaters, you should not faint immediately and voluptuously wait for the hour when this very exciting event happens. What if this marriage turns out to be not as perfect as your mama and papa marriage? Well, let us look closer to all main aspects of such a marriage.
Engagement
When we are referring to an engagement, for some reason most girls imagine a diamond ring and jewellery immediately. Not ordinary, but special, which settle in your casket in the boudoir. All the space covered in flowers, pleasant music plays, and nothing seems to spoil this sweet moment. However, something is rotten in the state of Denmark. The ring does not look catchy and most likely it has been demolished by four generations of women of this family. Most likely, you will have a rich inheritance in the future, but now this is something that you have to be content with for at least another six months. Moreover, couples do not marry immediately after the engagement! It is time to know this thing, girls! The thing that can really spoil this day... Probably it is the very first time when you first see your hubby. Traditions are traditions and love in noble families is not obligatory. Ew... I should remind you that not all young and promising ladies are lucky! You will certainly not have an ugly and blind husband, but… Not only his look matter, is it?
Wedding
If a white veil, treats, and dances are the first things to come to your mind, forget it! You will probably spend more than one evening together just making a list of all his relatives, who, undoubtedly, should be invited to the celebration. And no one will tell you facts that grandfather Roderick can be wildly drunken with ordinary apple cider and will certainly sing obscene dirty ditties and aunt Morgana will aggressively shout “Now a kiss!” every five minutes, of course. Oh, those vile Death Eaters! They will do anything to a noble lady kissed them all evening!
The very same wedding day can be remembered by the endless number of relatives who are drunk with firewiskey, rubbing shoes from Madame Malkin's shop and passionate desire to take them off. In addition, when it seems that there is more blood in wedding shoes than your feet, then a granny-toastmaster named Sulpicia will organize a festive relay race for you, dividing all relatives into the bride and groom teams. Perhaps only there you will understand why the hubby mother rubbed her hands so hard when she emphasized her in the guest list. Relatives from your side, whom you have always considered adequate, already being slightly drunk, will perceive this idea as the most valuable diamond in the mud compartment. And do not forget that you have to dance with all the drunken and sober relatives, including other Death Eaters. If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen! The result is miserable: the legs are not felt at all, it seems that something valuable was stolen from the house, several fights and unforgivable spells, broken windows in the smoking room, everything around in the garbage and even when you want to retire with the groom, most likely Auntie Albertina will go with you to conduct the initiation rite? What the hell?
The wedding night
As it is clear from what was written earlier, you will remember this first wedding night forever. Salutes and fireworks are still exploding around the house, the house is full of all sorts of psychopaths from the bride and groom sides, some floors resemble ancient Greek ruins more than the Parthenon in Greece, and Aunt Albertina drags into your bedroom. Therefore, close the door on fifteen protective spells, having stunk out Roderick and Morgana before. If you thought that intimacy begins here, then you are deeply mistaken. What did these psychopaths give you? Half the night passes in a wedding rush over the gifts that all those familiar and unfamiliar people bought for the young family. And when it turns out that the celebration cost more than all that was given by all these people - it certainly will not be up to sleep. How could they? Hasn’t even a three-story wedding cake paid off? All gifts to the last will be examined in the most thorough way, up to such household things as services. One of which, will break, of course, for good luck. Or was it originally broken? After all, when it turns out that, there is nothing in the last envelope except the greeting card; it will already be five in the morning. What a wedding night, think again! In addition, these bloody legs, after dancing with relative psychopaths. In the furnace. I am a bride. I was tortured all day, I survived and deserved to sleep. Intimacy? Some other time, honey.
Honeymoon
The honeymoon is not always going after the wedding and you should understand this especially when your husband is a Death Eater. No Bahamas and Caribs, a suburb of England and constantly leaving for some races (or maybe raids?) on the instructions of Oz, the Great and Terrible (wrong story villain?). If you suddenly want to spend time together (I do not exclude such a possibility), then you can go with your husband to do the task. And how do you like this? Yes, you have to dress all black and kill a couple of Order members, but is this really a problem? Good girls very rarely become wives of such bad boys. Therefore, you have enough gray matter. And generally speaking! The golden time that you spend before the birth of your first child is your honeymoon. Enjoy! It is possible that you are the same lucky girl who still gets to pull her hubby somewhere on the beaches and into the luxurious life by the sea - for this kind of rest, this instruction is very useful! First, stick down the mark on your husband's hand so that its signals are invisible and imperceptible; attach a cold for the latter. In case your man looks at other ladies in bathing suits, pull sharply on the plaster and remind this handsome man where to look! After all, the real goddess is you. If after this your husband is indestructible, there will always be a little witch mate – “Imperio”. What? All is fair in love and war!
The first year of marriage
According to statistics, the largest number of divorces occur in the first four years of marriage, and the first year of marriage is considered the most difficult and to some extent decisive. If you didn’t kill each other during this long busy year of joint scandals and tantrums on the basis of the husband’s constant absence at home (but the presence of the one at work and the service of the Lord, no brothels and the vail), you are a pretty promising couple for the magical world. It is possible that mama and papa were right, matchmaking you to this Death Eater. The art of marriage is to allow as little spoilage as possible! Try to be tolerant of your sweet Deathyeater. And then you will find the same answer in the form of jewellery, flowers and expensive things. This is a time when you can EVEN love your husband. But do not overdo it. So that a man does not get bored in a relationship and does not go in search of emotions on the side, you need to periodically drive him crazy. The main thing here is to drive him crazy, but not to screw the poor man’s brains out. And this is already a great art that not every nymph can master! But it is also worth remembering another, rather important rule. The less DE we love, the more he loves you back.
Everyday life
What you should not bother with is life. Cooking, washing and cleaning, all this will take home elves or house cleaners, as you wish. Now you are the lady who controls this infinitely troublesome process. Make sure that the poison for the Order of the Phoenix in the cauldron is cooked correctly, the bloodstains were washed down to squeak and snow-whiteness and the rooms of the house is clean and pleasant. If something is wrong, shout at the little minions, if they are guilty that something is wrong. And yes they all burn in hell ... You can follow the example of the Walburga, which hangs their little heads on the door handles. Another option is to tell your husband. Damn them, the next time they will be neater. Then why do we need living OP members, problems at work and dirty carpets for aristocratic clean feet? Remember that the house is in the first place and it is the face of the family. Finally, yet importantly, it must be clean. Several tactically correct decisions and your reputation will rise to a new level.
Husband's friends
Since your husband is a Death Eater, you should still accept the fact that all his friends are likely Death Eaters too. The first forty years in the boy's life are the most difficult. It is precisely for this reason that he communicates with them in order to make his own good way into life and provide it for your family too. Devoured circle, which is brought along by raincoats and masks from papier-mâché. Do not be angry with your husband, because this is not a club for trips to the Vails, but really for work. The better the job, the better your financial position and status in society. Stroke the raincoat, wave with a hand, and send a sweet kiss. This means that you will have a whole evening in the company of your beloved books, music, movies and a bottle of champagne. The main thing is to ensure that the husband returns home and does not cover the bed with blood, which in turn is made of very silk. Sometimes it may happen that the husband invites his friends to you for tea - in this case, offer all possible types of tea and bring a little house with a tray for tasting. Perhaps right now your husband will promote, and the promotion, as they say, is always only for the benefit.
Society
In any case, your family life should not end in seclusion as in lives of some noble ladies. Attend secular receptions as often as possible (especially those of Mrs. Goyle) and then your life will shine in new colours. Snake girlfriends will immediately understand your significance by the weight of the diamond necklace on your swan neck. Restaurants, expensive boutiques, and luxury items, this luxurious world is open to you like never before. Spending your husband's money is a pleasure with which nothing can compare, for sure, nothing in this beautiful, perfect world. Even if your husband is unpretentious and rather sparingly dressed for his billions, you should definitely shine for everyone to think for sure. “Yes, he spends all the money on his spouse, he loves her so much. It must be an excellent family. ” Image is quite important in modern society. Also, do not forget to invite pureblood relatives to you and send postcards with congratulations on all kinds of holidays. Who is Giovani Bulstrode? Nevermind! Happy New Year, Giovani. Happy Holidays. xoxo Aurora Travers.
Husband's family
You should not hope that the husband’s family will meet you with open arms. Yes, you are an enviable bride, but nevertheless, in their opinion, their son deserves much more than such as you. Without a doubt, in their eyes you are a beggar woman, without brains, you don’t do anything around the house and my little son could marry many better girls. Sooner or later, you will have to go into battle with the boss named Mother-in-law. Mother-in-law is still a leech. If you have ever heard the cry of Mandrake without headphones in the Miss Sprout greenhouse, then, believe me, these are the sounds you will wake up with every morning! So what are you, say, a ballet dancer and can you do all 32 fouettes? But can you cook borschsch like mom? And spit on her that she had never cooked that borschsch in her life! You just can not! But the photograph of the mother-in-law on the fridge is great for losing weight, I checked it myself.
Frequent problems
If your husband’s greatness increased exponentially, the Ministerial rats most likely began to suspect him of belonging to the Death Eaters. Visit your husband at work often, it is desirable to wear a badge with a quote “the Slytherin is just a slightly different side of Hufflepuff” on your chest. Smile to all the people in the Ministry and fill up your husband’s shirt where the mark is on or cover with your hand. And then the problems just get avoided. With such a wonderful wife.
Children
If your son or daughter grew up Gryffindor - then he or she, clearly, the shame of your pious little family. Since childhood, this is a little lump, tormenting you all nine months with kicks and pressure on the bladder. If after this hell, he or she did not stand in the way of truth, I mean Slytherin way; burn the child from your family tree so that the hole remains not only in the tapestry, but also in his or her heart, and in the whole Universe. You, as a wife and mother, should take care of raising your children. Around this point, you have to share sleepless nights with your hubby, because a one-year-old baby is an even bigger demon than any of the dragons of Bill Weasley. Kick your husband harder at night to get up to the baby, too, muttering sleepily under his breath that the first year is sure to nurse the little one yourself. Even after, when the child gets used not to cry in the arms of his father-devourer, you can change the tactics of education (for both father and son). By his or her five, the child should already be the subject of wealth and all sorts of investments. The best education. The best tutors. Severe upbringing. Ambitions are grafted from birth. Prospects for the future. Already before his first trip to the school of magic, the baby should know which faculties should be downgraded. Never let him or her just try to cheat and doesn’t get the faculty of Slytherin! Just not to say later that the mother 11 years raised a piglet, and he or she did not even congratulate her on March 8.
Decembrist's wife
Nevertheless, it may happen that your life will go downhill because your husband is a Death Eater. Not everyone justifies, not everyone manages to pay off his lot in Azkaban, and only a few can return to the ordinary life of luxury and nobility. Get ready to become the wife of the Decembrist and carry her husband to Azkaban, if that is at all possible. There you have to try so that the Dementors do not steal your soul, and so that the husband ate a little in this prison cell. Some husbands are somewhat more demanding, and then they will have to put in a shaving gel, new financial publications, and necessities, such as an elegant suit to get out of the slammer. Someday he will be released, that is for sure (in fact it is not accurate).
In general, that is all. I wish everyone to think carefully before marrying a Death Eater and have enough brains not to take credit for the wedding! With you was your favorite Miss Aurora Travers! Only love marriage matter!
P. S. LOL
❝ he wears the smell of blood and death like a perfume
there is fire in his eyes
and ice in his veins
but you love him anyway
for he is a star
burning with the light of a thousand suns
(and your world is dark without him) ❞ ( x )
