Hi, yes, hello, I am deeply in love with @insanelycoolish ‘s TLHR AU and his OC, Beckett, and this is the product - a 900 word vent.
TLHR and Beckett belong to Finn, I just highjack them because he lets me
Beckett watched silently, their chin propped unceremoniously on their palm as they stared at the screen before them.
On the other side of the digital connection, Declan was gesturing wildly, his hazel eyes bright as he lectured--no, ardently orated, Declan was no lecturer, he had his points and facts, but it was all accented by his obvious passion and beautifully phrased knowledge, he was a storyteller--on the benefits and setbacks of society. The topic had arisen when Beckett questioned the meaning of their QPP’s anarchist t-shirt, and it was now going on nearly ten minutes that Declan had been going, and Beckett was not complaining at all.
It turned out Declan had a frankly adorable dimple on his left cheek.
It also appeared that he had the slightest slur to his S’s that only arose when he was excited.
Beckett felt their heart thud in their chest. Sweet cheese and crackers, they were so gone on this boy.
Declan must have noticed their love-struck expression, because suddenly, he stopped speaking. The two stared at one another through their cameras for a few silent moments, Beckett still grinning softly, and Declan’s hat slowly slipping off now that he was finally still.
Beckett made no move to speak, their eyes soft and unguarded as they watched their QPP settle back down, admiring the light flush that decorated his cheekbones.
After a few moments, Declan turned from the screen, effectively breaking eye contact. He pulled off his bright yellow beanie and pushed his hair back into place before replacing the garment.
Beckett felt butterflies erupt in their stomach at the sight of Declan’s naturally fluffy hair. It wasn’t often that it was on display, and they treasured every little glimpse of it.
A cough brought their attention back to the present, and Beckett tore their eyes away from Declan’s hair and down to his eyes, which were once again on the screen. They smiled encouragingly.
It seemed to have the opposite effect, however, because a flash of… something… passed over Declan’s features.
Something that Beckett had never seen before on the other.
A pit began to grow in Beckett’s stomach. Whatever that look was, they didn’t like it. Especially not on Declan.
“Are you…” Declan was looking away once again, and Beckett struggled to swallow around the concerned lump forming in their throat. “Are you tired of m-this yet?”
Beckett blinked, their hand falling to their lap as they sat up straight. “What…? What do you mean, Dec…?”
Declan shrugged. Only the left half of his face was visible from this angle, and Beckett cursed the fact that they weren’t there in person. In person they could make Declan meet their eyes. In person they could wipe that awful devastated look away.
Beckett huffed, a bit exasperated that Declan would be so stubborn after a question like that. It didn’t help clear up the situation at all. Beckett had never known Declan to be this… unsure about anything.
Beckett saw Declan’s eyes cut towards the screen before quickly looking away again. “I don’t know. I just- This. Are you tired of this?” Their continued confusion must have shown, because Declan continued, scratching nervously at the skin on the back of his hand as he did so. “Us. Me. I can’t- I know you know it, but I can’t… fall in love, or whatever. Not like you.”
Beckett blinked. And then blinked again. Something in their heart squeezed helplessly. “You’re right, I do know that.”
Declan’s eyes shifted towards the screen once again. “Exactly. And… I just thought that I’d ask. Because I don’t know what you expect, but I’m not changing anytime soon, and you deserve-”
“I deserve what I want,” Beckett’s voice was calm, much more calm than their thoughts were at the moment, “and what I want is this. Just this, with you.”
Declan opened his mouth, and Beckett could practically see the sassy retort forming, the barbed wire armor of words coming up to guard his heart as he pushed his away. Beckett held up a hand.
“I know what I want. I’m already committed. You’re not getting rid of me that easily, Trompeur.”
Beckett watched as Declan turned fully in his chair, facing the screen head on. His usual lazy confidence was back in place, but Beckett was happy to say that they could see a bit of relief in those hazel eyes. “Wasn’t planning on it, Moran, just checking if you were still up to my standards.”
Beckett rolled their eyes, allowing their posture to relax once again this time cradling their chin between both of their hands. “Yeah, alright.” They paused, biting the inside of their cheek. “You know you’re just as important in this relationship as I am, right? Just because you’re aro-ace and I’m… not doesn’t mean that my orientation is more important than yours.”
They weren’t quite sure that they should have said that. Sure, they and Declan had spoken about this sort of thing before, when they were first agreeing on what this really was, but it still seemed to be a topic that they both avoided.
Declan’s expression softened minutely. “I know, Becks.”
“Dork. Now go on, tell me more about the lie that is the constitution.”
