Trigger warning: mentions of s*icidal thoughts and relationship and cheating OCD themes.
Since the DSM acts as if we manipulate people on purpose with our passivity, DPD is, in my experience:
☆ Not being able to handle space or distance from your depended and hating yourself for it later.
☆ Meltdowns from separation anxiety that occurred since you were a small child.
☆ Feeling completely inadequate to do things on your own, and if someone else takes over your task it increases that sense of inadequacy.
☆ Wanting to die during a meltdown when your brain tries to convince you that your depended will not love you or want you around anymore because of how intense your separation anxiety is.
☆ Learning from a young age that you are a bad person for having needs, so you put everyone else's first until you break.
☆ If you also have OCD, it will attack your relationships and make you question your loyalty.
☆ Your fawn response is overdeveloped, and you feel absolutely shitty for it.
☆ You feel like you need other people's support to survive.
☆ You don't know who you are outside of your relationships.
☆ (Positive:) You cherish your depended and want to meet all of their needs; you don't want to only have your needs met because you care a lot about your depended.
☆ (Positive:) If your connection to your depended is deep, you view them as special, wonderful, and everything you need (which means that disloyalty is very unlikely).
☆ Striving for independence because we recognize how our dependency could harm someone else.
Can we stop demonizing dpd please? It sucks to have and we are capable of being good people, and even learning some forms of independence.
