Discover Top Posts Tagged with #deusvacuus

What is something that you wish you were told more often?

How fucking clever I am.

And what absolutely exquisite taste I have in music.

And (the impossible one, but…) “You are not too much. I can’t get enough of you.”

#asks #get to know me #poets of tumblr #tumblr writers #writers #me #poet but also an insufferable slob for praise #deusvacuus #infinitus non vacuus

Night Country

I watch the unfolding of this twisted tale of the tragedies of that dark snowy wasteland and I just can’t help but think about you.

Tall. Abused. Furious.

Trapped behind that glacier of subtracted power and contrived circumstances. An ice cave formed by the gross incompetence of your elders.

I think I will always hold onto a pain for the child that you used to be. Even though I never met her in my timeline; I was only introduced to tiny fragments of her that would trickle out from the fissures in your adult persona.

I may have started to create a distance from the experience of sharing in your moments of recalled pain. Like a defense mechanism or an immune response. I started forming antibodies against your trauma. But I now despair the loss of the raw and stinging closeness that came from the times before any immunity had developed.

I never dressed your wounds but I still held your latent scars in my hands. Now I watch the dry icy flakes pile up on the bodies of those lost to madness or exposure and I pray for an end to the night. I pray that your day breaks.

#spilled ink #poetry #prose #deusvacuus #inkskinned

The Paradox

When we are free from the sin of having mass, will we be more or less integrated? —Our tales and tenets from the history of physical forms will be much less relevant to moon over.

What will drive the unrequiteness drama of our species once we all communicate so directly and unmistakably in a language of precise signs?

Not “reduced” to avatars, but crystallized into them. Into a simulacra that will eventually escape the self it was modeled after.

I don’t know who or what I’ll become when I’m no longer the anxious analytical thing that cannot sleep. I don’t know what I’ll use to assign value when there’s nothing uncertain left to ruminate or fantasize about.

Deus Vacuus

[Thanking @haikkun as always for the thought provocation]

#poetry #prose #spilled ink #deusvacuus

Brǣth I

Back when my body was small and my dreams were not. The worst thing I could imagine was that feeling of having all your wind knocked out.

To think that the body could be capable of such pointless distress. Such a benign suffocation. An impotent liminal space in which you are both dead and alive at the same time.

Just one long moment to ponder your ending before it finally lets up. Before your soul thaws out and you can breathe in again.

Grief still catches me like this feeling. Life is all just a game of kickball until I open my mail to find another letter addressed to you —Addressed to your deadness. And they want for my vitality to somehow stretch wide enough to make you still be alive too, if only for the closure of all your sordid affairs.

So here I am: your representative, being both dead and alive at the same time again. Just a stupid kid with skinned knees trying to hold in the tears so that nobody thinks of me the wrong way.

#deusvacuus #poetry #spilled ink #prose

Lost?

To be “lost” implies that there is some place you are always required to be, and only the guardians of that expectation (yourself included) can render the judgment that you are anywhere or nowhere wrongly.

So how much then do you contribute to your own feelings of lostness. If you weren’t yelling after that version of yourself who is always running ahead on the trail and laughing along with the forest: would that version be better or worse off? For one man’s getting lost is another man’s getting better.

Being your own best caretaker, when you stop obsessively keeping track of where you’re going and where you’ve gone, then you can finally experience the freedom of not being kept in so small a crate as your own narrowest expectations make.

I choose to believe that at all moments, you’re not supposed to be anywhere except where you are right then. Really, how could you be anywhere else?

#prose #spilled ink #deusvacuus #quote prompt #@haikkun

The 4th Defibrillation

Day 4 of Writers CPR: Post your top 3 writer recommendations. I was seriously dreading this day of the challenge because I always worry that what I will have to say about all those who have affected and inspired me will be insufficient. But I have resolved to drum up the courage and complete this quest nonetheless!

1.) @mournographies This guy is the first I found whose word choice and themes felt so reminiscent of my own from that period (at least in my own imagining, heh) that I almost reached out to ask about collaboration, or at least a further investigation of the similarity. Alas, I didn’t follow through with the thought and have occasionally kicked myself for it since. There is something compelling to me about the juxtaposition of the technical with the emotional/mythical and he does it so perfectly. Like our feelings are just physics... but all of our physical reality is interpreted through feeling. I see both things as a language to describe the other and I feel he does too and that’s why I love his poetry. 2.) @vasilinaorlova I first encountered her writing on here just after the era in which her book “Holy Robots” hit publication (2017), after which I greedily gobbled the whole thing up. One aspect of her writing that I truly aspire to is the seamless integration of both simple and complex language. Some of her pieces are so direct and literal, as if she’s painting picture book pages, but all building up to a moment of deep feeling that nearly echoes through your head. In other works (especially the more technical ones), she displays an incomparable degree of mastery over rare and exquisite word choices. Especially when you take into account that English is not even her first language! I really cannot recommend her enough.

3.) @inkskinned A name that probably needs zero introduction to anyone in the online writing scene. To me, she is the first writer on tumblr that I EVER followed and the first one whose tag I ever posted under in the hopes of having someone truly impressive see my own work. The pieces she has produced in the years that I’ve followed her have helped to remind me to see light in the world when I could only think of dark, and shown me all new darks that I had never thought about before. There’s a sort of superhuman confidence to her style so that even in the stream of consciousness it seems like she knows precisely what she means at all times. Early works of hers felt so genuine, and evocative, and reminiscent of my own high school and college era daydreams that it was like a stenographer reading back the dreamy transcript of what I had already felt but hadn’t found the right words to say, and what terrific and enchanting words they were! 3.5) @mvolta --who is no longer active Honorable mention to this writer and friend whose season on tumblr has ended. While he was here, his writing brought me both inspiration and drive, and utter astonishment that I still clutch onto some of them as notes in my phone today. Thanks again @haikkun for assigning me some VERY important and re-integrating homework.

#writerscpr #writers cpr #deus vacuus #deusvacuus #poetry #poets on tumblr

Ascend

Lift yourself up.

Above the weakness you see in all mirrors.

Above the crushing dark you feel when lights are out.

Above the memory of what is already buried down deep.

You are better off in the atmosphere.

Better within the noise lifting off the Earth at one of so many holy places.

Where the dreamers scream of their favorite noises, in the hopes that they will return again soon.

Sound begetting sound; light begetting light

So, sing now to escape that paradox of having mass.

#prose #poetry #spilled ink #deusvacuus #music