anonymous that definitely isn't @devilsparda / @bewitcheds sent: “okay, so for me, i really want my melody — i think you’re a cinnamoroll kind of guy, that’s this one here,” imani declares, squinting her eyes shut with exaggerated intent, her hands trembling in excitement as she rips the strip off with almost frantic urgency, too eager to let vergil see what she’s offering. she peeks at the figure in her hand, and the sun-dappled grin that once connoted innocence is now a misshapen pageantry of delight, more of a rictus than anything resembling joy. this thing is so fucking ugly [...] “oh! oh my god, it’s hangyodon! wow! wow…” her voice cracks at the top, clambering to a pitch that betrays the sheer strain of maintaining enthusiasm. she stares at it a moment too long with a prolonged smile that stretches too wide to be considered natural, then, with a burst of strained brightness: “he’s blue! aww! just like you!” she thrusts the figure into vergil’s hand. “you can have him! isn’t he cute?” MNDBDJCHXJXJSJS $15 gone…. 4 hangyodon……. hi ren ^_^
Despite his faults lining his humanity like cracks in a mirror and his attempts to blend in, Vergil will be honest: this sort of mundanity isn't the sort of thing Vergil aspires to. Blind boxes and trinkets and -- what. Where do they go? Where do you put them? They're too big to live in a pocket like a soapstone animal or a die or something, too unwieldy to be taken around, and if the appeal is how cute they are, won't you be afraid of breaking them? For someone as defined as his own fear as Vergil is, of course this sentiment extends even to the novelty of blind boxes and trinket collecting. That said, the designs are certainly cute, and Vergil gets the appeal to a mass audience, but then--why not just buy the one you want?
"What even is it," he deadpans after Imani points out the one he's supposed to like. A rabbit? A puppy? "Can it fly?" With its huge ears. His comment is laced with such sarcasm it might even deter Imani's enthusiasm for a moment--but only for a moment. He knows better. He doesn't get a chance to try and make another bored quip or observation when Imani's hands light like trembling kindled fire. Her excitement seems almost concocted, too large and excited over nothing to even feel real to Vergil, smile drifting and swallowing her features as giddy mirth takes hold. Again he feels lost, misunderstanding, or misrepresenting; I don't see what I've lost out on. But maybe Imani hates poetry. But also at least a poem you can read or re-read. What do you even do with this thing? It just takes up space! What's the point? Again, Vergil circles back to this finely honed sticking point over and over.
"Oh! Oh my god! It's Hangyodon!"
It's hideous. Eyebrows arc into tiny exaggerated triangles, Vergil's lips pursing slightly in the amusement you withhold when you don't want to get jokingly slapped. "That one wasn't on the box--," he glances back over it, seeing the little silhouette and three question marks. A secret? Why? Vergil hates not knowing things or not understanding, but he's baffled by the need to disguise one of the options, surely they're not any more expensive to make, right? But Imani's crestfallen attitude is kind of funny, that wow! / wow... forcing his eyebrows to stay peaked as she stares with barely-hidden despair at the thing being cradled in her free hand, other hand now holding the box. He doesn't say anything else and lets her grief ride its course, laughing in his own secret Vergil kind of way.
Suddenly the thing is forced to his body, making his arms have to unravel from being crossed across his chest, hands fumbling to grab the plastic toy so it doesn't fall to the ground. "What in the--no it does not! The color is completely wrong!" HE DOESN'T WANT THIS THING! Vergil scoffs, turning Hangyodon, or whatever it's called, in his hands to squint down at it. Unlike imani Vergil has never had a predisposition to manufactured enthusiasm. "It's a fish, right, and--," a pause, a mild, quickly drawn squint, as he considers how he can turn this 'it looks like you' comment back on her and get this thing away from him, "--your eyeshadow kind of resembles -- shiny fish scales. So--really it looks more like you." He holds Hangyodon up to his eye level to squint at it. "It called to you as a Devil Arm calls to its new wielder." A gesture that's both dramatic and clipped as he tries to force the trinket back into Imani's arms. A funny reversal from what he's done with Dante his whole life and trying to steal his twin's stuff for himself. "I can't believe you're so quick to give up, your resolve is clearly lacking. Don't go in there to buy another one. Imani. Ima--!" She's gone. He watches Imani's silhouette disappear back into the store and sighs sharply, now abandoned in the parking lot, eyes flashing down to stare at Hangyodon with barely concealed disapproval. He'd throw it in the trash but Imani would probably find out somehow and be even more mad at him for it even though it's not like she cares about the fish either.
Vergil can't say he cares about or grasps blind boxes or why people spend their money on them but he can officially say that between Hangyodon and Cinnamoroll he'd definitely prefer Cinnamoroll. But he doesn't prefer it enough to stay behind and watch the near cataclysmic fall-out that will happen if Imani gets another little guy she actually can't stand. He'll go pawn this onto Dante. If Dante gets rid of it, at least if Imani somehow finds out, she'll get mad at him and not Vergil, which is really the only victory Vergil needs. He pockets the little toy and immediately sets off for Devil May Cry, having thus learned of the dangers of mascots and blind boxes all in one, and if the store isn't standing by evening, well--that's just simply not his problem.
