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After the Great Fall there was not much left to do but hide, the entire population on Heaven was now down on Earth and the only person to blame was Castiel, or at least that’s what he thought. Castiel had to witness the falling of his entire kind the night he was misled by who he thought, was going to help him amend things in Heaven. The former angel, now for the very first time human, couldn’t take off his eyes from the sky; each one of his brothers and sisters falling and crashing into the Earth’s crust in an endless meteor shower. For humans it might be an inexplicable and maybe admirable event but for Castiel was the day he had proved to himself how useless he was.

He wandered off from the woods when he thought he just couldn’t bear it anymore. It was not long when he found the Winchesters, Sam was not doing good and Dean’s first glance at the angel felt like an angel blade pointed towards him; nonetheless, Castiel approached Dean who was holding his brother’s body and placed a hand on Sam’s shoulder in a failed attempt to heal him. He looked up at Dean with sadness in the deepest corner of his eyes and the hunter couldn’t help it but put his anger aside for that moment and take Sam to the Impala with Cas’ help. Dean got into the driver’s seat and Castiel rode shotgun, he didn’t say a word in the whole way back to the bunker, always leaning against the window looking up at the dark and quiet sky; he didn’t feel that connection with Heaven anymore, as though it had never existed.

A few days went by and Castiel refused to eat, shower, go out and the simplest things Dean and occasionally Sam asked him to do, their efforts were useless since Castiel had fallen in the hands of depression, flashbacks of that night going through his mind every time his tired body attempted to sleep. It felt worse than when he took on Sam’s suffering after the wall in his head had broken, it was something that he thought would never stop haunting him. He hadn’t slept for days and had grown a beard, wandering around the bunker trying to keep his thoughts away from that night but nothing seemed to work, he wanted to ask for help but he didn’t know how, even though he paid no attention to the Winchesters. He used to stay in the living room, sitting there on the couch, staring into the nothingness as though there was a constant limbo inside his mind stopping him from doing anything else.

#devilwillfit

"You are always a princess! Happy birthday..." (I read bday so I had to say something... Is it your bday or Griff's?)

"Thank you, Sammy. I’m just happy to spend it with my family."

(it’s both of our’s birthdays :))

#devilwillfit