#dezsa

[budiverzum]

[bmwadokveszek]

[dezsasdfghjkl]

Give me back my heartbeats Which I lost every time I hear the shuffling of your feet And your laughter that your eyes mime. Give me back my letters I’ve drained from my pen Those that sounded better From my mouth had I said them. Give me back my kisses From piers that I blew Hoping to land on your listless Lips so long ago I knew.

2/16/16

[dezsasdfghjkl]

2015: Thank you and farewell

The year 2015 was filled with blessings and wonderful adventures of which I have my family, friends, teachers and lover to thank for.

To my supermom: Thank you for your hard work and patience. I know it’s not easy to raise and oftentimes fight a teenage girl by yourself. Thank you for saying yes to my demands and for saying no when needed. Thank you for being proud of me even when I have failed you.  I owe you everything.

To my family: You are one of a kind, I am blessed that I was born into a family bonded with great love for each other. Thank you for building a home to which I can always run to when the world is too heavy for me to bear.

To my friends who came: I am grateful you chose to befriend me. May we fill each other’s lives with new jokes and adventures in the years to come.

To my friends who stayed: My life has been an abundance of epic chapters since you entered my life. Thank you for instantly making my gray days brighter and the (rain) showers bearable. Thank you for being my guardians against the evil forces that walk among us and warning bells each time they are near. Thank you for teaching me to be stronger for others.

To my friends who came back:  Thank you for growing up with me and giving us a chance to grow apart.  It was not easy but looking back I needed the distance. I grew up to be someone that has surprised you and me, still, you welcomed me back like we just parted yesterday. Thank you.

To my teachers and mentors: Thank you for thinking that I can, pushing me to my limits and appreciating what I couldn’t. You have inspired me to do better every time and if I’m at my best version it’s because you never stopped believing.

To my one and only: It’s our second year of celebrating the holidays and I can’t wait to spend more together. Thank you for sticking with me even if we have pushed each other a couple of times than I’d care to allow. Thank you for endlessly showering me with love and care.

The days weren’t always good but even the bad ones will forever make me smile for they were constant reminders that whatever happens I would get to say; I can make it through because I have you.

Here’s to a wonderful year that we have spent together and a greater year ahead. :)

[dezsasdfghjkl]

Always remember, you are unique just like everyone else.

but srsly tho everyone is unique in their own special way :)

[dezsasdfghjkl]

One minute you could be talking about Apec meetings and then get hit by an ambulance in the next.

[dezsasdfghjkl]

The other day I heard her say your name. It didn't sound right. It didn't sound like love. She put it out there for the world to hear. Doesn't she know the excitement you feel when I whisper your name? Doesn't she know how needed you feel every time you hear your name being said like it has finally belonged to someone. And it did belong to someone. It did belong to me.

D.R. 9/26/15

[dezsasdfghjkl]

Losing someone is like being left at my aunt’s home when I was a child. Every week everything would seem great on the way over there. Every week my father would take me to ride the carousel and eat out for ice cream. And when we arrive at my aunt’s place we’d talk and play until I fall asleep. I’d dream that I’d wake up to us playing again. But I wake up and my father is not there. So I ask for where he is and my aunt would say he just left. It would take me a moment to realize that and I’d burst into tears. Although I knew it he was bound to go home I always hoped that he’d stay. Those Sundays were always scary. The thought of you leaving me always feel like those Sundays; it may seem that we are still my dream but you have left all along and all of a sudden everything still looks familiar but feel unfamiliar.