#diamisia

[our-enbian-experience]

My questioning enbian experience is wondering if it’s worth exploring for myself when there are so few enbies out there. I mean, I could try to put myself out there and find more enbies, but I’d actually have to come out as nonbinary publicly first. I don’t know what that would look like.

It’s also me wondering if I’m really preferentially attracted to nonbinary people or if a relationship with a nonbinary person is just my only hope for not getting forcibly binarized by my partner and by society when I’m with my partner.

(I’m also toric/attracted to men, but I have difficulty imagining a relationship with one where I wouldn’t either be sorted into being mlm/a gay man or wlm/a straight woman. Either situation feels wrong to me.)

this is enbian experience!

mod reply under the cut.

yes, it's hard to explore the attraction to nonbinary people with all exorsexism we face. erasure, degendering, misgendering, binarization... it may be difficult and complicated to come out and look for community.

forced binarization of nonbinary experiences and relationships is a huge issue! i think it at least partially informs some of my labels (i intentionally pick more nonbinary-centric ones to highlight that i am nonbinary and to confront binarization).

i hope you'll be able to figure out your relationships with enbian label. you're always welcome to use it, whatever informs your choice. and you're always welcome to reject it if it doesn't feel right.

[nocturnalgemstones]

You ever think about how Frisk and Chara are commonly "headcanonned" as girls, unless their being shipped with each other? Then the author will nearly always make Frisk a boy while Chara remains a girl? Not to mention that Chara and Frisk are almost never written as nonbinary no matter who they're shipped with. Because relationships are for men and women only, I guess.