#dirtypaw16.

[ruinaa-a-blog]

          & --- --- @dirtypaw

          “hey ––” the credits for their latest movie are rolling, and she can see that distant look in his eyes, like he’s not really paying attention at all and hasn’t been for some time now. she nudges his thigh with her foot, watching him close, head tilted. “–– penny for your thoughts?”

[ruinaa-arc-blog]

          @dirtypaw

          she’s spent much of her time ferrying between the city and westchester while elliot heals. now that he’s –– not completely better, but nearly there, she settles in the city a little more, unable to confine herself to the professor’s old, too-big house and the new faces that continuously pop up there. she still calls elliot daily, visits three times weekly, and promises, against her better judgement, to stay out of trouble.

          it’s her luck, then, that in the days following, everything she’d thought she and roman had is flipped on its head. it starts much the same it had with shilah, when he’d found out; roman is remarkably clever, and she’s surprised, really, that he hadn’t figured it out before. only more so when she realizes why he knows so much and there’s a sharp sting of betrayal, acidic in the back of her throat, that lingers even afterward. they decide to take some time apart. it’s not all together unexpected. 

          what it does leave her with is some strange feeling of loss, suddenly, without someone else to pour her energy into; elliot doesn’t need her to smother him with attention, especially when he seems determined to heal on his own, at his own pace, and roman doesn’t much need it, either. it’s how she finds herself at shilah’s, letting herself in with the key he’d given her (just in case you ever need a place to go, sweettart), full of that restless energy that never means anything good. 

          she’s on her hands and knees, scrubbing at the baseboards, when she hears his door open and close. she exhales, blows her hair out of her face, and glances over her shoulder at him without offering much of an immediate explanation. 

           finally, “roman and i are taking a break.” she keeps scrubbing, like she’s annoyed by the floor, the nonexistent dirt there. “can you nudge that bucket of water over a little closer to me, please?”