#dlog

[burnt2ashleys]

hey.

been a while, huh. I don't remember how many months since I've made an entry here. This is a dlog, or something like it, but I haven't really interacted with this beyond the occasional like and reblog spree.

The past several months have not been kind to me, the last 2 more than the rest. And while I could air out my very real, lame and depressing IRL woes, I think it's best if I spare you and I both from making a wall of text wall-ier.

I draw for a life (not a living, because I've not made much money out of it, but I don't do much else being a NEET), and Clip Studio Paint, my preferred program to draw in, seems to have hiccups I can't fix no matter what, so after months of trying and failing, I went back to Photoshop to draw. It wasn't until a few days ago that I finally felt like I had something going in regards to art digitally (last time I felt this way was in May). Heck, I was (and kinda still am!) even drawing on paper to keep a habit going.

But, things seem to be flowing again. At least, for now. Everything is still very tenuous and things could still go breasts-up at a moment's notice, but I'm willing to believe that I'll make it out okay despite everything.

That said, it's October, the halloween month. And I made myself a new avatar! It's my first time painting in a very long time. Check it out:

I don't know about you guys, but I feel I nailed this. I'm really proud of it!

And I feel kinda confident, almost excited to tackle some of the projects I've been letting gather dust for several years. Though, whether or not I'll be able to do anything concrete this month remains to be seen. It'll be a busy, busy next few weeks and months.

To whoever reads this: Thanks. I may not know you, but I'm thankful someone took some time out of their day to read... whatever this is, really.

[amugeona382]

9-9-2019: 600 kcal 🥣🥦🥘🍫

[bluebellsandcamellias]

u kno when u remember something traumatic ... have a lil panic attack and blackout a lil bit .. nap .. then remember it again but now ur just feeling. numb

[aanotaa]

🍋💛🍐

Всегда нравились лимоны и груши. Не по вкусу , а по их строению , цвету , определённости в жизни фруктов . Лимон ярко жёлтый , что меня очень вдохновляет. Кислый на вкус , но если добавить сахару то получится очень даже вкусно. Некоторые люди похожи на лимон. Они от природы кислые , но если на них посыпать немного своего внимание , Дружбы , любви то они сразу станут сладенькими.

Люблю заваривать чай чёрный с долькой лимона , имбиря и чайной ложкой мёда . Это мой любимый напиток .

Меня зовут Аня. Мне 17 лет. Мечтаю о путешествиях в фургончике. И иногода люблю жить.

[burnt2ashleys]

yeah... dlogs huh

been a hot minute since I've done one of these. Like 8 months. Lots of things can happen in that much time. Spare you the details (mainly because I can scarce remember them myself nowadays), but someone got hit by a car the day after my birthday, and as of recent, my tablet's broken, so no more digital art for the foreseeable future.

Still, despite all the setbacks, what choice is there but to live? Despair or no, one must continue. I'm watching movies and old anime (Patlabor and Slayers, to name a couple), drawing on paper like ye olde masters, going out for walks. I hope (as there's too much outside my control) that things will work out in the end.

So far, I've managed to draw every single day of 2024, with maybe one miss due to straight up not managing to sleep one night (currently getting that checked out...) and I intend to keep the streak going, no matter what.

The road's been treacherous, and if I am to achieve my goals, the road will only get worse. But damn it, I didn't get this far to quit, and I have so many projects I want to (nay, need to!) see realized!

I'm not sure if anypony's reading this, whether presently or futurely, but if you are, thanks. I bet that this'll be but a simple sour note in the vast history of all the cool stuff I'm gonna build once I'm finally outta this big, ugly funk.

[burnt2ashleys]

Ugh.

Things have not been okay on my end, but that's not the reason I'm not posting here anymore. The interface changed and now it looks like Tw*tter and it sucks. If there's some way to change the interface back, please let me know, I beg of... whoever reads this thing.

If things continue to worsen in the internet sphere, I might have to hasten my ultimate plan: Getting my own site to post my art and blogs in. It was always the endgame, but I suppose the world will spin regardless of your sensibilities. Better sooner than later, too!

Truth be told though, over the months I've been coming to terms with the possibility that I might be depressed. Not rationally concluding it, but internalizing it. If there's a neat and tidy solution, I've yet to find it, but it's becoming clear that it's getting to the point where I can't work this out exactly alone. And while knowing the issue is half the fight, having more intel can't be bad, and is something I direly need.

I don't know if there's a point to this dlog other than feeling the need to write something for this place after so much inactivity (and there is a lot to type here in terms of updates, but I'm just... not in the headspace to type that stuff out), but I'll try to make update posts as my situation worsens, improves, or shimmies on over to the side like a metaphorical crab.

And I made a text wall again. Shucks.

[kanmine]

thinking about rapunzel dlog au

seori is rapunzel (bc he has longish hair and beats people up with a pan) and instead of getting kidnapped by a witch, the tower and forest is haunted so the ghosts scammed his parents basically. but fortunately! (or unfortunately, for the ghosts) seori beats the living(??) daylights(????) out of the ghosts so he’s not in any danger. he just really likes the tower or something.

hwado is an overworked mercenary knight and on a commission he finds the tower and seori. the commission was just hunting some animals so hwado couldn’t care less but his job sucks and seori keeps saying “yoooo come live with me i’ve got plenty of spare rooms” so why not. finishes the commission and moves in.

gishin would probably be a hermit in the forest who never sleeps and does strange things. he tries to look for work but let’s be fr no one hires him, so while wandering around he finds the tower and seori and hwado and goes neat lol. whatever.

narang and gishin are friends, but narang lives in a town farther from the forest. she decides to move to the town and while looking for a house bumps into. you know. The Tower. so anyways she moves in.

bina’s sent to exorcise the ghosts but finds out she likes the squad better than her coworkers so she Also moves in

and now everyone lives in the tower while pretending to be weird forest gremlins scaring the locals.

[kanmine]

BINAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa *gets hit by a car*