One Sided: Twitter Series
so this is it, a new series I’m starting and yes, it’s a bit different to the others but let me know what you think :)
masterlist / request / submit
One /Two / Three / Four / Five / Six / Seven
The darkness grew around me yet I never felt more awake. Sleep was a distant memory I wished for at this time and wanted nothing more than tiredness to lace my mind for just one night.
Picking up my phone I try and listen to calming music, an entire playlist set up with piano, soft melodies to avail the heaviness of being awake and never completely shutting off.
3:22am. 26.7.16
So far it has been a night of deep thoughts, and not always good ones. My thoughts have been so deep I struggled to come up for air and felt as if I were drowning. Everything was becoming too much, I couldn't have a moment's peace.
Friends from all around the world had been contacted, I knew that for them it was around 10, 11pm maybe meaning they'd happily talk for a few more hours. Anna probably knew the most therefore was the easiest to talk to about it all when I couldn't sleep. Despite this was a reoccurring issue the others didn't quite grasp it, the subtle messages of being awake at 5 in the morning on a tuesday night didn’t register as alarming, except to Anna who saw how sleep deprived I was on facetime, I couldn’t hide behind a filter on snapchat there.
She suggested I message someone else, a person who I could feel comfortable with and be honest without fear of judgement. So, I typed out my message then erased it, convinced it was daft.
Holding my phone in my grip I pondered over the words that lingered in my mind, maybe it won’t be so bad, it’s always worth a try.
Clicking back onto the little bird surrounded by a blue box I went back to my messages and retyped it out, hoping she’d answer like the others have done so far.
3:23am: Hey Liz! Just wanted to say congratulations on getting the job sorry I've been so vacant on the chat for a while. I had a favour to ask of you and I understand entirely if you aren't willing to.
Patiently I waited, convinced I wouldn’t get a response from her so I closed the app and spoke to another friend, messaging someone who had a clear understanding on what was happening to me. Scrolling through various pictures and quotes a light ping sounded over my music, my eyes went wide and I clicked on her message.
3:25am: Thank you! And what's the favor?
Momentarily I paused over the keys, rethinking how sad it may sound to her. Then I played over Anna’s words, you can always ask, even then if she says no you’ve tried.
3:25am: You know how you have Ashtons follow? Okay it sounds weird af but I have this kinda long ass message to send and was wondering if I could Dm him by any chance? I get its a bit odd and all
3:26am: Yes! That's totally fine!
3:26am: Seriously?
3:26am: Yeah!
3:26am: How do you wanna do this? :)
I began to talk to Liz in more depth about what it was I wanted to say, she understood quickly that it was more of a personal matter and within minutes she set up a chat. Seeing his name along with mine in one place, it was a weird to think I could actually say something, whether it would be read is an entirely different story but at least it could be out there.
3:29am: Okay, here goes I guess. I’m not sure if it will make sense.
3:29am: Hi Ashton,