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Text: DON'T FUCKING PULL THAT SHIT COCKWRANGLER. Not falling for having your brains scrambled cause the teabaggers nob flew up too high. Heard you got the bits lock and chained now. Garter belts strapped in and shit. Wont stop saving the little bit from this type of fuckery neither.
Text: Whatever it is that you’re thinking that Viggo and I are doing, let me assure that isn’t the case. Please calm down. Shadow Wolfe’s a bright little one, and he's in good hands.
Text: HELL ARE YA DOING TO THE LITTLE BIT? Don't need their mitts getting soiled by your faggot rubbish. Had to fucking take a piss out of what should be sacred. Bras and knickers and goddamn tarts all over the place. Could've been heaven. FUCKING SHIT ALL OVER IT.
Text: What on earth are you talking about? And please stop sending our little one porn.
Text: Can smell shit spouting off from here, love. Didn't drop off the face of the earth none. Little shit and me had a scrap. Probably heard some already. Fucking mess he is. Couldn't let you see me bloodied and fucking feelsy.
Text: But… you’re gone. Like, you and Jaeger left. Are you okay? Is he okay? Why didn’t you want me to see you like that?
Text: Fucking hell. Post didn't get to ya yet did it, sweetheart? Can't have another one of you lot falling apart on me. Had my wits of it.
Text: Post? No, if you sent me something, I didn't get it. Don't worry. I'm not falling apart or... just don't worry about me.
Oy, jizzface! You fuck that shit out of outback barbie at the cockwrangler's? Shoving your face till you're taking a lick out of your own asshole if you did.
[The delete button is pressed without a change in expression, flipping to the next message as if scrolling through an array of spam.]
Text: Didn't think you'd get anything to be stuffed with, being with the fairy and all. Come over to the cockwrangler's with me for the hols.
Text: Don't be rude, Horatio. Besides, I think you took care of that a few days ago... Cockwrangler? Who the heck... or what the heck is that?
