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Ghost Story

Fandom: ragehappy Ship: Jeremwood, pre-Doolraywood Words: 1.8k Tags: Battle Buddies AU, immortal fahc

Summary: A sniper and a ghost walked into a bar. It sounded like a bad joke. Maybe I am the punchline, Ray mused. A sniper, a ghost, and an immortal walked into a bar.

Read here on Ao3. Inspired by this post.

A Thank You fic for @vagrantblvrd who is such an incredible sweetheart <3

A sniper and a ghost walked into a bar.

It sounded like a bad joke, but as Ray grabbed a red bull and a diet coke from the bar, the flickering shadow he could see from the corner of his eyes reminded him of the reality of his situation.

Maybe I am the punchline, Ray mused as he set the diet coke in front of the empty seat next to him. Last time he came here, Ryan threw a hissy fit when Ray wouldn’t get him anything to drink. He had yet to see his dead companion actually drink the coke, but it was easier to humour him than dealing with the headache of his complaints. He couldn’t even see him, per se - barely a blur, a distortion of air rippling in place as he moved. But he could hear him.

Like fucking hell could he hear him.

It all started with an assignment three months ago. Ray hadn’t given the job much thought - wasn’t sure what his employer got out of it. Didn’t care to be honest. Whether it was for revenge, or to get rid of a rival. As long as he was paid, Ray couldn’t care less for the personal details. The only thing of note was that his target was a mercenary, so he’d have to take additional precautions.

Not that it mattered. Ray was known as a silent assassin, a sniper who never got close to his targets. There was no reason for this to be different.

Except. Here he was, with the ghost of a dead man following him around. Haunting him, or whatever. Ryan, he learned, followed him from his death, curious who got the best of him. And then who hired a sniper to kill him. Ray saw no point in keeping secrets from a ghost - at least, once he was convinced Ryan was real.

So a sniper and a ghost walked into a bar. The sniper was looking for a new job, and fuck if he knew what Ryan’s deal was.

Ray looked up as the door fell shut, the jingling of bells covered by the noise of the crowd. A man walked in - broad-shouldered, bald and short, possibly even shorter than Ray. He barely would have spared him another glance, aside from admiring those arms in the fantastically tight shirt, if Ryan hadn’t straightened. No, that wasn’t quite the right word- solidified. The shadow turned denser, took on a more distinguishable shape, looking much closer to the man he’d killed.

“You know him?” Ray asked, hiding his mouth behind the glass of red bull.

“Maaaybe,” Ryan said, in a way that clearly meant yes. His voice echoed across the room, an ethereal reverberation that left his ears ringing.

Ray glanced over as the bald man leaned against the bar, exchanging words with the bartender. He ordered a beer and saluted the bartender with it, before turning to survey the room. His eyes zeroed in unnervingly quick on Ray.

Or… Ray cocked his head, eyeing the stranger closely. He wasn’t looking at Ray - he was staring at the empty seat next to him.

“Can he see you?” Ray asked under his breath, arching a brow as the man sauntered closer. The ghost rippled in the corner of his eyes, his… arms? moving around as if he was gesticulating wildly.

“Why would you think that?” Ryan returned evenly. Ray didn’t look at him, not wanting to give any indication he could see him. The man’s face remind blank, but his eyes flickered to follow Ryan’s gestures, and that was answer enough.

“Is he like you?”

Ryan snorted, a weirdly echoing sound.

“He’s not a ghost, obviously.”

But Ryan neither confirmed nor denied it. Curious. Did that mean Ryan wasn’t a ghost, either? He was certainly dead. Or, well. Undead.

The stranger seemed to be quite alive. Ray could see the pulse flickering at his throat, the beads of sweat gleaming on his head. There was a healthy flush to his cheeks, and he’d interacted with others at the bar. Ray wasn’t just imagining him, then.

So.

An immortal walked into a bar and sat down across from Ray. He sprawled in his chair, staring at Ray intently. Ray raised a questioning brow, taking a sip from his red bull.

“Hi there,” the man said, nodding his chin at the empty seat with Ryan’s coke. “You waiting for someone, buddy?”

“Not exactly,” Ray replied easily, evading the question. He gave the stranger a pointed look. “You looking for someone, shortstack?”

His eyes flickered almost involuntarily towards Ryan.

“Perhaps.” The stranger smiled guilelessly and leaned forward, holding out his hand across the table. “I’m Jeremy.”

“Ray.” He took the offered hand and squeezed shortly. “You here for a reason, or just chasing ghosts?”

Jeremy burst out into startled laughter.

“Funny,” he chuckled, shaking his head. “Maybe I’m here for you, hot stuff.”

He let his gaze travel over Ray, who couldn’t help but flush a little at the attention. Luckily, it would be hard to see with the shadows of the bar and his tan skin… he hoped. Ray cleared his throat.

“Nice try, dude.” He tipped his head towards the empty chair between them and the diet coke resting abandoned in front of it. “You gonna keep beating around the bush or...?”

“Depends on what you know.” Jeremy grinned devilishly as he casually added, “Sweetcheeks.”

Ray blinked slowly, not letting on if the nickname affected him. Jeremy was a very attractive man. And under any other circumstances, he would be glad to take him up on the implied offer, but. There was a mystery to unravel. Whatever Ryan’s deal was, Jeremy was clearly involved somehow. And that made him dangerous.

“So are you like Ryan?” Ray tilted his head, watching Jeremy closely. “He wouldn’t actually say.”

Jeremy ignored his question, focussing on the last part of what he said. “You can actually hear him?”

“You can’t?” Ray returned evenly, mind scrambling at this new piece of information, because… “You can see him though.”

“Yes,” Jeremy admitted drily, flipping the shadow off. Ryan cackled eerily. “He’s been making rude gestures the entire time. So either you can’t see him or you have the world’s best poker face.”

Ray chanced a glance at Ryan, but the most he could make out was the shape of a man. “He’s kind of a blur to me. A distortion in the air,” he explained before side-eyeing Jeremy. “Since you arrived, he’s become… firmer. Less flimsy, more… real, I guess.”

“Interesting,” Jeremy muttered, and for once, made no secret of looking straight at Ryan. Then he started signing sharply with his hands. Ray’s eyebrows rose up into his hairline.

“You speak ASL?” he inquired curiously. Jeremy gave him a quick glance, before returning to… argue? with Ryan.

“Had to,” he replied casually, ending on a rude gesture. “To communicate with this fucker.”

Ray’s eyes narrowed. “Was he mute in life?”

“What?” Jeremy blinked, torn from his argument as he turned to look at Ray.

“Or deaf?” Ray added offhandedly, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. “Why else would you need to communicate via sign language?”

Jeremy’s expression slipped and his eyes shuttered. Ryan, however, chuckled, in his eerie, ethereal way.

“Clever boy,” he whispered, causing a shiver to run down Ray’s spine. “I knew I liked you for a reason.”

“You don’t say,” Ray drawled, tilting his head to indicate he was talking to their dead companion. Then he cut Jeremy a look. “He wasn’t, was he? So this happened before.” He arched a brow in Ryan’s general direction. “If you can come back to life, why are you still a ghost?”

“That’s actually why I’m here,” Jeremy piped up, plopping his elbows on the table and leaning forward. “What the fuck, Ryan. You’ve been dead for months now.”

“That’s not-” Ryan started with a frustrated noise, hands flying into action. Ray glanced between him and Jeremy, whose frown darkened.

“What do you mean, he-” Jeremy asked sharply, fingers flowing into three distinct gestures. His eyes narrowed, and he turned towards Ray. “You killed him?”

“To my eternal regret,” Ray replied dryly, shrugging. “Or annoyance, or whatever. He’s been haunting me ever since.”

Jeremy gave him a long look, before quietly turning to Ryan, fingers stiff and furious as he signed at him. The shadowy blur shifted next to him.

“Because-” Ryan rippled and wavered. “No, but- Jeremy-” A frustrated groan, and then, “He’s interesting!”

“You know I can hear you, right?” Ray pointed out, arching a brow at the ghost. Ryan sputtered. Jeremy chuckled.

“I gotta admit, that is curious.” Jeremy cut him a sly glance. “You some kind of medium or something, buddy?”

Ray shrugged, emptying his can of red bull. “Dunno. This idiot’s my first ghost. Not-ghost.” Ray’s brow furrowed. “Whatever you guys are.”

“Immortal,” Jeremy supplied. At Ray’s incredulous look he shrugged. “Not in the can’t die sense, per se. Well. Kinda?” He lifted his right shoulder in a shrug. “We die, we float, we return to our bodies, we live. Usually.”

At that he glared at Ryan. Ray leaned back, processing that information.

“So you, what, respawn?” he inquired, scrunching up his nose. Jeremy glanced at him, nodded, then shrugged.

“Basically, yeah.”

“Fuck. Alright.” Ray dragged his hand over his hair. “I need another drink,” he muttered under his breath, lifting his nearly empty glass.

Jeremy pointedly looked at the lone diet coke sitting on the table. Ray rolled his eyes.

“He kept complaining.” Ray hooked a thumb over his shoulder in Ryan’s direction as he raised the glass to his lips.

“Aww, I’m sorry, buddy,” Jeremy addressed him, a smirk playing around his lips. “Guess they don’t serve spirits here.”

Ray snorted up red bull, slapping a hand over his nose. “Dude.”

Jeremy laughed and slid his chair back. “Another red bull, or something stronger?”

“Red bull’s fine,” Ray said, grimacing. “I don’t drink alcohol.”

“Alright,” Jeremy said easily, raising a brow at Ryan before he sauntered off to the bar, getting them both a refill.

“He likes you,” Ryan whispered right next to his ear. A shiver ran down his spine, but Ray ignored it.

“Sure he does,” he muttered under his breath, shaking his head. The other patrons didn’t pay them any attention, and Ray supposed that’s why he usually did business here. Nobody cared as long as you didn’t bother them. Jeremy caught his eyes from the bar and winked. Ray rolled his eyes.

A sniper, a ghost, and an immortal walked into a bar.

And maybe that wasn’t as bad a set-up as he first assumed.

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