THE STING of a bandaged gash on her forehead & pungent scent of iodoform assaults her senses without mercy ---- the loud corridor chatter & diseased patients coughing out their lungs always made her roil . tonight it was quiet , tonight they were absent and the only sounds to be heard were rhythmic & mechanical . good , she thought . at least i’ll be able to rest . but all tiredness had left her body , she was left only with exhaustion & sore joints that would evoke small groans each time she tried to move . she doesn’t call for anyone , but instead draws her skinny closer to the torso & sheets that wrinkle into the shape of her battered body . she looks up , the dim glow of sickly blue lights adheres to her pallor like watercolors bleeding on paper . i look like a ghost . the thought amuses her , but there’s an eeriness that comes with that dead silence that's unsettling . she curls her hand into a fist to rub the dampness off drowsy lids , chasing away slumber with charcoal knuckles , smudging down a trail of black mascara across her cheek . she sits up , bones jutting from the spine & abdomen sunken . that’s when she feels it . that sharp tug --- probing the sore flesh of her wishbone wrists .
❛ ow ! ❜ a hiss caught between small teeth’s drowned out by the monitor’s constant , steady beeping & dripping iv . there’s more than one needle strapped to her upper hand & inner elbow . it makes her feel a little mechanical too .
the ripple of her voice is hoarse & impatient . nothing echoes back . it’s fine , she murmurs something in reassurance before gripping at the hanging tubes , all at once , ripping them off & rupturing veins , severing the strings that bind her with clashing savagery ------ sweetness drained from her face . something red dribbles down her elbow and her grip tightens like a vice , using the bottom of her gown to stop the blood flow . it’s so big ! she stares at it with contempt , uncovering her thighs to step on the floor with bare feet --- it looks like a potato sack or an old sheet , just hanging loose off her shoulders . peeking into the dark hallway with beady eyes , she feels emptied . like there’s a gaping hole in her the center of her stomach that can’t ever be filled . like her throat is parched but drinking water would never quench the thirst .
