you turn towards the voice, and find a very drunken (and very adorable) soonyoung standing to your right, a glass of whiskey (?) in hand. he was loud enough to be heard over the noise of the club, yet you still perked up and leaned towards him.
"hello."
"what'ss a pretty lady like you hic... doing over hereee?" his voice sounded almost like a sing-song. he probably had a little too much of the drink. confirming your thoughts, he stumbles into the chair next to you.
"just winding up after a long day, you know? what about you?"
"well, i jus wanna let loooose tonight. with my friendsss. they're prolly out there, hic, dancing or drinking," he waves his hands around, pointing towards his friends. but you're only looking at him. a small smile forms on your lips, but you're quick to hide it.
"i see... it's too crowded here, you wanna go somewhere private?" you offer, pretending innocence.
he lets out a loud gasp, "oh no! i have a girlfriendd!! hic she's somewhere around here. she'll end you iff she finds out."
"is she that dangerous?"
"sometimess, but she's veeery sweet. hic always takes care off me. kisses me goodnight and goood morning. hic, always sends me cute stuff that reminds her of me... hic-"
he stands up as he's speaking, but then stumbles again and falls into the seat, face first onto the counter.
you gasp and rush over to him, patting him on the cheek, "omg, soonie? soonyoung? are you okay??"
he lets out a slow groan before raising his head and looking at you. his eyes sparkle with recognition
"y/n!! omg you're here! i was hic just talking about you! come on, let'ss have a drink!" he shouts and turns to call the bartender, "sir-"
"soonie, come on, let's go home. you're way too drunk," you pull him by his hand to get him to stand. even in his drunken state, he laughs and let's you lead him.
"y/n you know something? i met a lady back at the counter. she kind of looked a lot like you. But! she tried to hit on me!!"
you play along, pretending surprise, "really? what did you say?"
"I pushed her away, of course. can't ever forget my baby. my sweet, lovely babyyy..."
At the other end of the string (Soulmate AU ft. Seventeen Members)
Genre: Fluff with a tiny winy bit of angst
Warnings: Talks about accidents (not really much to worry about like just a hint of it or something)
Wordcount: 5665
Author’s Note: This is my first soulmate Au and I hope you guys like it. Ireally have no other ideas for scenarios, so if you just request anything, it would really matter.
Summary/Preview: Having a general idea of who your soulmate is before you meet them poses a lot of questions. Would you bother meeting up with other people? Would you want to fall in love just for the heck of it? Would you leave the person you love for the person fate chose for you to spend your life with?
Because in this universe, you can hear the music that your soulmate is currently listening to, wherever they are in the world. Like a link between the two of you. An invisible connection. And as a music producer, Jihoon had a lot of say about his soulmate's musical taste.
He picked up on second ring.
"The fuck do you want?"
Jihoon paused, checked to see if he dialed the correct number, and then placed his phone back next to his ear to talk. "Soonyoung?" he asked.
On the other end of the line, Soonyoung shocked himself awake, and dropped his phone in attempt to check that he wasn't drunk enough to hallucinate Jihoon calling him. "Lee Jihoon?" he asked when he managed to maneuver his phone correctly.
"That's me."
"Wha- Are you okay? Where are you? Do you need anything? I'll be right there, I'm ju-"
"Did you just wake up? You sound very drunk."
Soonyoung blinked a few times in effort to clear his thoughts and eyesight. His house was a mess from the party last night, and most of his guests were still where he left them when he passed out, which was mostly on the floor. "I-yeah. It was wild last night," he said.
"I heard," Jihoon said, and Soonyoung could almost hear him smile. "Seungcheol-hyung didn't pick up."
"Considering everything that happened last night, I'd say Seungcheol-hyung had it worst," Soonyoung said and rubbed his eyes. "He was drunk, and still took care of everyone else, and then drank a bit more afterwards."
"A Jeonghan-hyung incident, I'm guessing," Jihoon said.
"Uh-huh. It's a fun story. Want to hear about it?"
Jihoon heard Soonyoung yelp and trip over something, then whisper some apologies to the poor body he just injured.
"That was Jun, sorry. You were saying something?"
"My parents just went home. I wanted to spend some time outside today."
Soonyoung tripped again, but this time he didn't bother picking himself up. "You're going out today? What's up? Are you seriously okay?"
"More than okay," Jihoon said, letting himself laugh. "What time can you get yourself sorted?"
"What time is it?”
"About 3, I think."
"What?"
There was a lot of crashing and yelling on the other line. Jihoon guessed Soonyoung tripped over everyone on the floor when he went to check the clock. That idiot could have just checked his phone, Jihoon thought.
"15 minutes," Soonyoung said.
"I can pick you up," Jihoon offered.
"So your parents did buy you a car," Soonyoung said.
Jihoon let his face drop on his free hand. "Yeah, among other things," he said. "Seungcheol-hyung?"
"We have so much to talk about," Soonyoung said.
"Tell me about it," Jihoon breathed, then smiled. They have so, so much to talk about. "I'll be there in 15."
"See you."
Soonyoung was ready in 10. There was not much to prepare, anyway. He was done after a quick shower, except he had to call for pizza in case the guys woke up hungry and murderous, they have distraction. He prepared sunglasses because he was hungover (and also to annoy Jihoon), although he knew it wouldn't do him any good. They would probably stay inside a café, or a mall. Jihoon's definition of outside was outside his house, and inside somewhere else. Somewhere quiet, and unknown so there will be a few people… like a library.
Soonyoung stopped himself from laughing out loud, trying to imagine his drunk ass in a library.
But the surprise of Jihoon calling him still hadn't worn off even after the shower, it was almost enough to sober him up. Jihoon had never called him before. In fact, Soonyoung was sure he never saw or heard Jihoon calling anyone on the phone before. Not even Seungcheol who'd known Jihoon longer than any of them. He's more of a texting person. His emergencies were three consecutive messages. A short ring, probably, but never a phone call.
Jihoon was in a good mood.
To be fair, if Soonyoung was given a brand-new sedan by his parents, he would be over the moon, too, even if he was soulmate-less.
"It's red," Soonyoung said when Jihoon rolled down his window.
"Too flashy?"
"For your taste. It could be my car for all we know."
Jihoon only grinned. "Mom picked the color. Get in."
Soonyoung made himself comfortable, connecting the aux cord to his phone after disconnecting Jihoon's, then choosing a song before Jihoon could complain. Jihoon looked like he wanted to say something when the music played but decided to keep his mouth shut.
"Passenger gets to choose," he muttered, when Soonyoung then asked for permission to connect his phone.
Conversation consisted mostly of Soonyoung complaining about his headache, and Jihoon amusing him. Jihoon wasn't one to amuse anyone. His mood was too good, it was almost disturbing.
"Are you sure, absolutely sure you're okay? You're scaring me a bit right now," Soonyoung said.
Jihoon glanced quickly to show a smile, "I've never been better. Still a bit pissed about Seungcheol-hyung telling you guys about everything, but I guess he was too drunk last night. Otherwise, I'm grand."
"Wait." Soonyoung paused the music and stared at him. "You called Seungcheol-hyung first. What am I? A Seungcheol-hyung substitute? I'm hurt. You can drop me off over here."
"It's a tunnel."
"You can stop after the tunnel."
Jihoon laughed. "You're not. A Seungcheol-hyung substitute, I mean. A lot happened the past days, like the car, and other good things, and I haven't talked to him in a while… You know what I mean."
"I know exactly what you mean," Soonyoung sulked, and unbuckled his seatbelt. "I'll just throw myself out of the car, then."
"Soonyoung. Now look at what you've done. It's beeping."
Soonyoung put his seatbelt back on, and the beeping sound stopped. Kids and their new cars, he thought. "Why am I not adopted by the Lee family?" Soonyoung asked, his cheek flat on the tinted window beside him. "You should have heard him talk about your dad last night. As if he's really part of your family. He could be Lee Seungcheol and you'd be Choi Jihoon, and it wouldn't make a difference."
Soonyoung knew what Seungcheol meant to Jihoon from all the years of watching the two have silent conversations with their hands. Seungcheol was the only one who can go inside Jihoon's studio without permission and not get killed in the process. Seungcheol was the only one who can pluck an excessively loud-playing earbud off Jihoon's ear when Jihoon didn't want to talk to anyone (which used to be all the time). Seungcheol was the one person Lee Jihoon trusted with his life.
And yet, Soonyoung couldn't help it.
Jihoon wanted to say that Seungcheol was family, he should be, after everything he'd done, but thought better of it since Soonyoung was being difficult.
"Okay, what did I do?" Jihoon asked. "Besides the Seungcheol-hyung thing."
"Not important."
"So there is something."
"It's not im- where are we?"
Jihoon just entered the parking space of an open area that looked vaguely familiar. It had a lot of people loitering around and there were a lot of available activities one could get into.
"A park," Jihoon said.
"I could see that," Soonyoung looked at Jihoon who was only so focused on making his parking perfect. "Why are we here?"
"There's this open café that offers hangover drinks. Jeonghan-hyung said they were great."
Soonyoung sat up straight for a while before slapping his cheeks alternately.
"Ow," Jihoon said, turning off the engine. "That must've hurt."
"And I'm still here. I'm not dreaming."
"And we're getting coffee," Jihoon said after getting his backpack from the backseat. "Let's go."
Soonyoung followed Jihoon, who was unmistakably sunny that day. Even the way he walked and carried himself was different. It was already too hard to stay angry at him, why did he have to be too bubbly (how can that word even be associated with Lee Jihoon?) that day?
"My treat, since I woke you up this afternoon," Jihoon said when Soonyoung told him his order.
Soonyoung stared at him. "You witch."
"Wizard," Jihoon corrected him. "And 'mind-reader' is the specific word you're looking for."
Soonyoung frowned. "Now you're giving me more reasons to be mad at you."
"Go ahead. Do you want cake with your coffee?"
"Yes, please."
Jihoon grinned. "You know your money, Kwon Soonyoung."
"It's not every day Lee Jihoon takes me out on a date. I should make the best of it."
Jihoon considered it, then shrugged. He took their tray then led Soonyoung to the field overlooking the bay and sunset where mats were laid for the customers.
Soonyoung decided he was not angry at Jihoon anymore when he didn't correct him when he said date considering how quick he was to correct him of his magic-related references. That absolute nerd.
"I'm guessing you were dreaming of your soulmate again," Jihoon said when they were comfortable.
"Okay, now I hate you and your mind-reading powers," Soonyoung said before taking a sip on his drink and made a mistake of gasping afterwards. He couldn't help himself. "What kind of voodoo magic is in this thing? Why is it so good?"
"It's Jeonghan-hyung recommended. Nothing but A+ if it's from him. I've always wanted to try them before, but I never had the reason to go out." Jihoon looked satisfied. "And it's not as if you don't go on telling everyone when you have a soulmate-related dream. Seungcheol-hyung never stops talking about it when you do."
"Wow, Seungcheol-hyung is horrible at keeping his mouth shut."
"He just cares too much for all of us," Jihoon looked at him pointedly.
Guess Choi Seungcheol really is number one for Lee Jihoon, Soonyoung thought.
"It's the most vivid one I had," Soonyoung said instead. "Vivid is not a word to describe it, though. How do you describe music like that? Vivid. Sharp. Detailed? Like in 1080- no, 4k resolution."
Jihoon frowned. "You're horrible at this."
"The point is, there was nothing I can see in the dream. It's just me… and the music," Soonyoung said, as if in a trance. "It was magical. I've never heard the song before, I think it's something out of this world. From another language or another planet, I don't know. But it's something different, and something distinct. It's hard to explain. But it was beautiful. Almost haunting. Heartbreaking."
Jihoon took the liberty of eating the first bite of the cake. "So you're mad at me because I woke you from that dream."
Soonyoung scrunched up his nose. "It's not petty."
"I didn't say it was," Jihoon said, sitting up from his side-lying position. "I know how important it is to you. I'm sorry."
"Don't be." Soonyoung took a breath. "It shouldn't even be a big deal anymore. I should have been over being soulmate-less since a long time ago. And you know how to make up for it," Soonyoung said when Jihoon looked like he was going to say something. "And it was the first time you ever called me. I thought it was an emergency."
Jihoon laughed. "Definitely not. My parents told me to enjoy today and spend a lot, so that's exactly what I'm doing. And I figured you were the other person I can bother since last night."
"Last night was that kind of night," Soonyoung said, and proceeded to tell Jihoon what he missed the night before.
It started fun, and lazy, like how any party their group threw before. Then they started playing Never have I ever, and it became like a confession of some sorts for everyone. Seungkwan and Vernon found out then that they were soulmates.
"That's too obvious, almost unexciting," Jihoon commented.
Vernon found out it was Seungkwan because Seungkwan kept singing too loudly. Hearing singing was rare, but apparently Vernon had it. Jeonghan revealed that he also found out his soulmate was Seokmin because he can hear singing, too.
"Then, Choi Seungcheol went ballistic?" Jihoon guessed.
Soonyoung thought about it. Jihoon realized later that he was trying to remember what happened. "No, not at all. Seungcheol-hyung was classy about it. He even proposed a toast for them. It was Jeonghan-hyung who was like Never have I ever fallen in love with a person who was not my soulmate."
Jihoon laughed. "That devil!"
"So, of course, both of them drank! And then everyone went ballistic."
Seokmin knew about it, of course, but Jeonghan was long over Choi Seungcheol, and both of them were happy, so it wasn't really a problem for the two of them. Seungcheol was still nostalgic about Jeonghan, probably, but he was being a good sport about it. Especially since he already met Joshua. But Joshua drank a shot too, which implied a lot of things. Was he in love with someone else? Was he in love with Jeonghan? Were Joshua and Seungcheol actually soulmates? No one knew.
Then there was this portion where everyone was revealing when they became emotionally aware.
"Everyone was drunk by this time?"
"No one would talk about it otherwise," Soonyoung confirmed.
Seungkwan became emotionally aware when he got into Pledis, and said that Vernon's wide taste of music meant a lot of untimely songs playing during a lot of situations. Vernon, when he dropped out of school to pursue his passion in music. Wonwoo, when he was reading a book, something just clicked inside him, and he thought he was just dreaming up the music. Seokmin, when he got ambushed by dogs in a pet café just a few weeks ago. Joshua, when he confessed to his crush back in the States and found it really weird that he could suddenly hear a Korean song out of nowhere.
"Isn't that why he drank the shot before that?" Jihoon asked.
Soonyoung shrugged. "Who knows with Joshua-hyung? He's a total mask to me."
Seungcheol, when he told Jeonghan he loved him. Jeonghan, when they broke up.
"It was a mutual break up," Jihoon put in.
"It was?" Soonyoung sounded surprised.
"At least, that's what Seungcheol-hyung said. He said they really talked about it, and then they came into a conclusion that the music was there for a reason, and that even though they could try fighting for each other, it might not end up well anyway…"
"Seokmin and Jeonghan-hyung are happy," Soonyoung said.
"They're the only ones," Jihoon pointed out. He'd been with Seungcheol so many nights with the speakers turned up so loudly, anyone can go deaf. To drown out the music, Seungcheol told him.
Soonyoung sighed. "Wish there was a universe where we didn't know who our soulmate is, and we get to live our lives just as we want to."
Jihoon couldn’t help laughing at the absurdity of that thought. "That sounds nice actually."
"Remember that one time when you said you don't mind if you don't meet your soulmate at all?"
Jihoon blinked. "What about it?"
Soonyoung picked on the slice of cake that was almost finished. "You really don't mind? Not meeting your soulmate? Not knowing who that person is at the other end of the string?"
Jihoon thought about it. "I'm curious," he admitted after a while. "And there are a lot of things I'm grateful for that invisible person and their music. I do try guessing sometimes, too. But I feel like my life won't drastically change when I mee- why are you looking at me like that?"
Soonyoung talked fast, despite knowing Jihoon hated it when anyone did. "I have this question that's been bugging me since a while ago, but I feel like you'll kick me in the balls if I ask."
"I'll kick you anyway if you don't ask it now."
"Have you met them already?"
Jihoon paused, his fork halfway to his mouth. "What?"
"I just thought," Soonyoung shrugged. "You were acting differently the whole day, I figured something happened. I thought you may have met your soulmate already. Have you?"
Jihoon laughed so hard, he fell back on the mat.
"What?" Soonyoung asked, when Jihoon calmed down.
"I just remembered," Jihoon said as he sat up, still catching his breath. "There was a time that I thought Seungcheol-hyung was my soulmate."
Soonyoung choked on his coffee, but fortunately didn't make a mess.
"Right?" Jihoon laughed again. "It just so happened that he kept listening to the same songs I was hearing. So for a while, I thought that soulmates didn't have to mean being romantically involved, or ending up with each other, considering Seungcheol-hyung is already like my older brother. Maybe soulmates meant being part of each other's souls, I thought. Like we share parts of each other."
Soonyoung gaped at him. "I like that definition of soulmates better," he said quietly. "That means I can have a soulmate, too. We could be soulmates," he added like an afterthought.
Jihoon let the smile form, feeling grateful despite himself. "We could be."
They played catch and baseball with a few kids in the park afterwards. Jihoon was surprisingly good at the sport and was kind enough to teach the kids what he knew. They ended when the sun was taking a slow dip into the horizon, and the kids already had to go home.
"Didn't know you liked kids," Soonyoung said when they returned to their mat with another batch of coffee.
"I didn't either," Jihoon said, lying on the mat. "What time did you have to go home?"
Soonyoung groaned. "Don't remind me. The guys probably left the house as it is, and I would have to clean it up later."
"Just get someone else to clean it for you if you don't want to," Jihoon said.
"Spoken like a true rich kid," Soonyoung laughed. "So what happened? Your dad got a promotion?"
Jihoon shifted so that Soonyoung can see him beaming. "We've been waiting for that promotion for a long time. It's a pretty big position, and he got the bonuses that were withheld from him for the longest time. My parents came to Seoul to celebrate in such a short notice, but I didn't mind."
"And here I thought you purposely scheduled their visit during our night out because you hated it when people talked over each other and also so you would be exempted from telling sappy emot-- OW," Soonyong laughed, taking Jihoon's straw from him. "Prove me wrong then," Soonyoung challenged. "When did you become emotionally aware?"
Jihoon made a face. "You're really pushing your boundaries today, huh?"
Soonyoung shrugged. "I just felt like I should make the best of today since you're being lenient."
Jihoon sighed. He knew he won't be able to shake Soonyoung off anyway. Especially since he seemed to be determined to sap Jihoon's secrets dry today. "You know for this we need alcohol."
Soonyoung shook his head vigorously. "No, thank you. I had enough alcohol to last me a month."
Jihoon thought about it, then he sat up and said, "You start."
"I thought everyone knew about it," Soonyoung blinked. "My parents used to fight a lot when I was younger. I think, one night was like a boundary point for me that while they were shouting at each other, this music just enveloped me like a shield, so I didn't have to hear them screaming at each other from the other room."
"Then, it just... stopped."
"Yeah," Soonyoung said, sipping from his coffee. "The music usually came during night. It was rare in the morning, and it was a rare special morning that day because I can hear music playing. I don't even remember what song it was, which is still one of my biggest regrets to this day."
Jihoon looked at their empty plate and cups half-filled with coffee between them, then at Soonyoung who was watching the sun.
"The music stopped playing, like when you rip the earphones off your phone suddenly. I thought they just stopped listening to the music for some reason. But then, it was gone. Really gone. I never heard it again."
Soonyoung was squinting at the sun, Jihoon wasn't sure if he was angry at it, or at the world, or he just had really small eyes.
"I still wonder if I make the music up when I do hear it in the very, very rare nights like last night. At least my parents are better now. And I'm a choreographer in this huge company. We're living good. Things get better."
Jihoon nodded. Soonyoung was one of the most optimistic people he knew, and his insight always inspired Jihoon.
Jihoon thought that there was no better time to tell his story than then. "6 years ago," he started. "I got into this huge traffic accident. The bus rolled over, and there were a lot of casualties. My mom was just lying on the street. We thought she was dead."
All of Soonyoung's senses went on high alert. Did he just get Lee Jihoon to talk about his superhero backstory? Despite asking, he assumed Jihoon would only give him a general summary of the story, and Soonyoung wouldn't have minded.
"It's a miracle we survived," Jihoon said. "Then the funniest thing happened. As I was crying over my mom's body in the middle of the street, this obnoxious rock song played in the background like some kind of joke. Let me tell you, my soulmate has horrible music taste."
"So there are those kinds of pairs," Soonyoung said, trying to keep the atmosphere as light as possible since he noticed Jihoon struggle a bit. "People who hate each other's music preference."
"To be fair, I'm really hard to please." Jihoon said, acknowledging Soonyoung's effort with a nod, before continuing slowly. "You and the guys know how my mom's a bit hard of hearing, right? The accident took a lot from us. I had a lot of injuries, myself. And I just got in Pledis that time, it was difficult for me."
He took a breath as he remembered. "But Seungcheol-hyung was there to stop me from doing anything stupid. He kept going to the rehab centers with me, and he learned sign language with me..."
"He's been teaching me, too," Soonyoung said. "It's a good choreography source material."
Jihoon nodded. "We lost a lot of money because of the rehabs and temporary treatments that were never enough," he continued. "But look at us now. My dad just got the promotion we've been hoping for since forever. And it covered a lot of our health insurance. For one, my mom just had surgery to correct her hearing yesterday."
Soonyoung reddened, embarrassed about what he said about Jihoon's parents visiting. "That is great news," he managed to say.
Jihoon smiled. "Things do get better," he finished with a breath of relief.
Jihoon was proud of himself. His doctors had told him before that it was therapeutic to be able to talk about his accident with other people, but he had always been scared of their reaction. Seungcheol was the only one who knew the whole story. Soonyoung could very well be the second one.
"I've always wanted to thank my soulmate," Jihoon said, reaching for his backpack where he packed his laptop. "Their music saved my life quite literally."
"You're setting up your magical producer things," Soonyoung said.
Jihoon looked up from his laptop to give him a quick glare. "I've been writing this song for a while. Seungcheol-hyung had been my ear and critique when I wrote it. It's the first one I've ever actually finished. Company's been lenient with me just collaborating with other producers, but it's time, I think, to show them than I can stand my own. Kind of sappy of me to present a song for my soulmate to them."
"I can't believe Lee Jihoon just called himself sappy."
"Do you want to listen to it or not?"
Soonyoung paused, feeling everything all at once. Mostly surprised. And honored. "You want me…"
"I don't want you. I just want you to listen to it," Jihoon said when Soonyoung didn't continue.
Soonyoung stared at him for a while, and that short moment of silence was almost enough to make Jihoon close his laptop and pedal back. To tell Soonyoung, no. He didn't want Soonyoung to hear it, after all. He didn't have to. It's fine. It's fine. It's fi-
But what Soonyoung said almost made Jihoon laugh at his own insecurities, "You just said it's for your soulmate."
"It's for a lot of people," Jihoon clarified. "I'm presenting it to the company later this week. And I'm guessing my soulmate was the first one to hear it, anyway."
He plugged in his earphones and placed the buds in his ears to quickly run through the song again. He let his parents hear it that morning, and they heard his fears, his vulnerabilities and even his gratitude and his pride. They were proud of him for being able to translate that into his work, and for being able to rise above everything they went through.
It had been an emotional morning for Jihoon. He was glad to have Soonyoung that afternoon.
"Still needs a bit of work," Jihoon said after skipping through the last chorus, then offered one of the earbuds to Soonyoung, who he noticed just now was frozen in place. "Soonyoung?"
Soonyoung turned his head slowly and looked at Jihoon with his eyes wide open. Like it was the first time he ever saw him.
"What?"
"I just realized something incredibly sad," Soonyoung muttered.
Jihoon froze and tried to remember what he had been saying the past few hours. He felt his walls suddenly rebuilding at the thought that Soonyoung must have found out something Jihoon didn't want him to know.
He cursed silently. He didn't know his reaction would still be fear in front his vulnerability. He was glad Soonyoung took his story with ease and didn't look at him with pity. But his demons were there again, creeping on his shoulder, telling he will never be accepted, and he will always be incomplete. No one could possibly…
"What if you find out who your soulmate is, and then it turns out that you're not theirs."
Jihoon remembered how to breathe.
"There could be possibility of that," Soonyoung said with a little frustration. "Someone else could have none. Someone else could have someone else. " Soonyoung puffed out his cheeks, then released the air he held. "It's sad, don't you think?"
Jihoon was overthinking. Overthinking is bad, Jihoon thought.
He repeated these thoughts over his head, before offering the earphones again, both of them this time. "That's incredibly sad, and incredibly random," Jihoon said.
"Can you listen to that one more time, please?" Soonyoung said, visibly backing away from the Jihoon.
"What? Why?"
Soonyoung stood up then walked a little away from where they were originally sitting. "Listen to it," he said, before stopping a few feet away then turning to face Jihoon, blocking the sun behind him.
Jihoon didn't understand the request. There was suddenly too much going on his mind that moment, all his fears and nightmares shouting in his head, reminding him of all the nights he spent awake, imagining what would happen if he told his friends. It never ended pretty.
Nevertheless, Jihoon placed the earphones in his ears. He looked at Soonyoung, who nodded as if signaling him to play it.
Just play it.
He pressed the play button, and for a while, all Jihoon could hear besides the song was his heartbeat. He watched Soonyoung turn into the color of the sunset, and saw his eyes widen at the sound. He was frozen as Soonyoung drop to his knees through the verse. Soonyoung was looking at Jihoon the whole time, and Jihoon couldn't make himself look away.
Then, Soonyoung signed.
It was clumsy, and too full of extra movements, but Jihoon understood.
"Can you turn up the volume?"
Jihoon put it on max, and Soonyoung winced, as if--
Jihoon paused the song in realization.
Soonyoung signed again, this time more slowly. More accurately.
"It's you," he said.
"You can--"
He was suddenly in between Soonyoung's arms.
Soonyoung held him tightly at first then loosened his grip, remembering that Jihoon hated being touched, but he couldn't get himself to let go. He didn't want to. And he was grateful that even though Jihoon didn't reach for him, he didn't push him away either.
"It's you," Soonyoung whispered.
Soonyoung couldn't understand what happened. When Jihoon played the song, Soonyoung thought the song sounded familiar, and was about to ask whether Jihoon played the song to them before. Then he saw that Jihoon was actually listening through his earphones. How loud are those earphones, Soonyoung wondered.
Then it clicked.
"It was the song in my dream," he said.
Jihoon was so overwhelmed he couldn't put into words what he felt. Confusion? Surprise? But mostly peace. Peace in knowing that his demons were wrong. Soonyoung will not run from him.
Jihoon instructed himself to breathe, and then he laughed. It was the most absurd thing to do in the moment of pure emotion, but everything in itself was absurd, now that he thought about it. "Wait, you're the one who played You are My Sunshine on repeat for a week?!"
Soonyoung finally let him go but stayed within arm's length. "And you just called my music taste horrible."
"It is horrible, you monster! How can you listen to a single song on repeat for a whole day? Some songs can go on for a week! What is wrong with you?"
"I am offended!" Soonyoung cried, but he was smiling. "I'm a choreographer. Of course, I have to listen to a song over and over again."
"You had to choreograph You are my sunshine my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are grey?"
"I can't believe you didn't sing that! How can you not sing that?"
They were yelling at each other, and laughing, and smiling and Jihoon realized he had never felt this happy before. And he finally could wrap his head around it. For some reason, it made sense.
Soonyoung is my soulmate.
"Big question," Soonyoung said, sitting closer to him this time.
Jihoon realized that despite being the one of the touchiest person he knew, Soonyoung respected his personal space. He was never too close, and never demanded for hugs, like other people did. Jihoon thought to list all the things he was grateful for this person.
"Why didn't I hear you before? All this time you've been writing songs and music."
Jihoon took a deep breath.
Now or never.
He gingerly reached for the back of his ear, where a little device sat comfortably. He shifted his head so the Soonyoung can see his new best friend. The most important gift he had received from his parents ever since the accident. The one thing Jihoon needed that they couldn't buy for him because they didn't have the money, and Jihoon always wanted that they prioritized his mom.
His hearing aide.
Soonyoung's eyes grew big. "You're--"
"I wrote by eye and memory," Jihoon said, turning to face him again. "And I still hear the vibrations. I feel them. Seungcheol-hyung helped most of the time. I've never really heard any of the songs I've written before this morning, although I got the aid yesterday. I just have a general idea of how they sounded like."
Soonyoung stared at him. "Whoah. What kind of monster are you?"
"The kind that's your soulmate, apparently," Jihoon said, glancing sidewards, and found Soonyoung trying to fight a smile. Jihoon couldn't believe he said that out loud either. "I suppose I should thank you now."
"For my bad taste of music?" Soonyoung cracked up.
Jihoon can't help laughing, too, and then said, "The first few weeks and months after the accident, I couldn't accept it. Imagine a music producer who can't hear a thing." Jihoon heard his voice crack, transported back to those moments again, remembering. "It was more than frustrating. And then You are My Sunshine comes playing along--"
"You are My Sunshine can be our song."
"No," Jihoon said so firmly that Soonyoung had to laugh again.
"But, yeah. Thank you," Jihoon said. "As annoying as your music taste is, it helped a lot. The world didn't feel as dark and quiet as it should have been."
Soonyoung reached over and pinched Jihoon's cheek.
Jihoon closed his eyes in annoyance before slapping the hand away. "You've been wanting to do that."
"You're adorable."
"Just because you're my soulmate doesn't mean you get a free pass on invading my personal space," Jihoon said, and Soonyoung pinched his other cheek.
"I just-" Soonyoung breathed. "I can't believe it's you. All this time I thought I didn't have a soulmate. I thought they died a long time ago."
Jihoon didn't slap the hand this time, and pinching stopped on its own. It became a caress.
"I love the song," Soonyoung said, and let his hand fall.
"I love the sound of your voice," Jihoon said before he could stop himself. "Seungcheol-hyung tried describing how each of you guys sound like, but he's really bad at it."
The orange light of the sun deepened across Soonyoung's cheeks. "When you called this afternoon…" he said.
Jihoon nodded with a short laugh. "That was the first time I ever heard you speak. Your first words are iconic."
Soonyoung chuckled nervously. "I should have tried better."
"And… you were the first person I called. Not Seungcheol-hyung," Jihoon confessed. "This morning I decided I wanted the special people in my life to hear the song, and Seungcheol-hyung already did, so I thought I should call you."
Both of them stared at the setting sun.
"This is not going to make sense," Soonyoung said, without looking at him. "But I think I miss you."
Jihoon smiled. "It makes all the sense in the world. I think I miss you, too."
Soulmate AU inspired by a tumblr post by drowning-in-fandoms and Jihoon being hard of hearing is from another user that I can't credit bc I got them from pinterest don't hate me I swear I love u guys. T^T
