Booze Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
Anyone ask for some drunk Logan being adorable? No? Just me? Well you're getting it anyways. lol
So this was one of my WIPs I had mentioned some time back. I've had this fic kicking around for quite a while now and after several rewrites and then just adding to it in general it turned out ridiculously long. 😬 Was originally just going to be a quick little 2.5k word fic or something. My motivation has been down in the dumps the past few months with it being a major struggle to write anything, not for lack of trying, so I'm happy that I managed to at least finish something. 💗💪
This fic is tooth-rottingly fluffy, and I think writing it has helped to cheer me up. Hopefully its silliness will make someone else smile too. I can't believe it's been over a year since this movie dropped, and I'm still so hooked on these two guys. lol
SFW Tickle Fic
"Deadpool and Wolverine"-verse
ler!Wade/Deadpool x lee!Logan/Wolverine
Word Count: 9,350
"Woahwoahwoah, easy there, Drunky Brewster," Wade attempted to steady his stumbling friend as they walked down the sidewalk from Logan's favorite bar downtown, "I'm not carrying your heavy metal ass all the way back home again."
Logan laughed and gave Wade a hard shove away from him.
"Hah! As if I'd....As if I'd give you the pleasure," he slurred a little before gulping down another sip from the bottle of bourbon in his hand, prompting Wade to just shake his head at him in unconcealed amusement.
"Yeah yeah, this way, goofy," Wade chuckled as he grabbed Logan's arm to pull him in the direction to cross through the mile long city park that they commonly used as a short cut back to their apartment.
"Where ya takin' me?" Logan's eyes drifted around as he leaned into Wade for support, his question causing the other man to sigh loudly.
"For the love of fucking Go-.....This is like dealing with a big, hairy toddler. Home. For the billionth time, I'm taking you home," Wade stated firmly as Logan suddenly frowned and pushed off of him.
"Who said I was goin' home with you? You're not gettin' to third base on the first date, bub."
Wade just stood there looking at him with a resigned smile and his fists on his hips.
"You know if you weren't so charmingly ridiculous, I'd dump your drunk ass into one of these bushes and come back for you in the morning. Now listen up because I'm only going to explain this one more motherfucking time.....WE LIVE TOGETHER. My home is your home so that is where we are going. Un-der-stand?"
"Oh.....," Logan was silent for a few moments with a blissful look in his eyes before a grin split his face again, "Well I fuckin' knew that, Wade. Still doesn't mean you're gettin' in my pants though. Can't get me drunk enough for that."
He then broke into a giggle fit that made Wade instantly forgive every stupid thing that had come out his mouth that night. He wished Logan could be this laid back all of the time.
Still he truly treasured the fact that he had a live-in roommate and best friend that he could hang out with, even if Logan was currently a bit incapacitated. But now that Logan was in this universe and some of his more depressive thoughts had eased off, he wasn't drinking as much to drown out his feelings.
However he was still a liquor connoisseur and enjoyed going out for drinks more often than not. Only now when he got drunk his mood was much lighter than it used to be, and Wade found he was a lot tamer in that state. It was much more fun to mess with him because his inhibitions were loosened enough for him to give it right back.
Wade would normally have a drink or so, but he wasn't into such heavy drinking and was typically the sober of the two. You would think that with at least him being clear-headed that the both of them would manage to stay out of trouble, but Wade was an instigator of chaos through and through.
Drunken brawls were all too common on their nights out together with many started from Logan hitting on too many redheads while that woman's boyfriend was sitting right next to her. Other times though Wade would want to liven things up and just get crazy urges to do things like throw a chair out of nowhere or even start running his mouth with intentions to piss people off and get them to throw the first punch.
Though on nights like tonight when Logan had consumed entirely too much alcohol he became more of a liability in these situations, leaving Wade to handle most of the dirty work.
"All I'm sayin' is that guy was askin' for it," Logan muttered when Wade brought up the scene they had just departed from, "So sue me for, ya know....bein' the stand-up guy that I am.....defendin' your honor and shit."
Wade chuckled before he looked at the other man in astonishment.
"Logan, all he asked me was if I knew what time it was."
Logan was now the one looking confused as Wade could see him trying to focus inside his head and recant the night's events.
"Ya mean he didn't call ya a 'loud-mouthed shit-for-brains with a face that looks like a shriveled nutsack'?" He asked with his head tilted and receiving a hard stare from Wade, though after a minute he started to break into a grin, "Oh yeah, now I remember.....that was me."
Wade just sighed with his own amused smile while Logan was now having trouble walking with how hard he was laughing.
"Yeah, well his friends didn't appreciate you throwing him over the bar, and I was then obligated to cover your ass," Wade gave him a soft punch on the arm, "And if I have to be honest, I think you were slowing me down back there. If that one guy hadn't broken his fist on your face, then I think he might've had the upper hand on you."
Logan immediately calmed down and scoffed, feeling insulted.
"Pffffft...Bullshit. Ain't no one got the upper hand on me. I coulda took 'em all with both arms tied behind my back."
"Riiiiiight. That's a cute little fantasy. I'm pretty sure even a baby kitten could take you down right now."
"Oh yeah? Ya wanna-*HIC*-go, bub? Maybe ya don't know who you're messin' with, but I'm the fucking Wolverine," Logan swayed as he got into a sloppy fighting stance though his claws seemed to get stuck coming out of his knuckles and were only protruding a small amount, just like the time when Wade had first met his drunk ass, "Trust me, you....you don't want to take on me."
Wade simply stared at him blankly for a few moments before taking a step towards him and giving him a firm push backwards. Logan's reflexes and sense of balance were completely obliterated by all the alcohol he had drank, and he barely even flailed as his rear end hit the ground.
"Oh how the mighty have fallen," Wade just looked down with mock pity, shaking his head at the giggling man below him.
"And I didn't even spill my drink," Logan declared proudly with his drunken grin, toasting his bottle upwards before finishing it off and dropping it onto the grass.
"Well that is the important thing now. God forbid you don't get that last drop into your already overloaded system," Wade chuckled as he looked around the area that they had stopped in, not surprised to find it deserted given the hour of night it was.
He figured it wouldn't hurt to rest here for a while to enjoy the peace and maybe give Logan a chance to sober up to make it more manageable in getting him home. He plopped down onto the ground next to Logan who then let out a grunt of discomfort.
"Goddamn it's hot out here. Right? Is it hot out here, or is it just me?" Logan asked while he crudely fumbled to undo the buttons on his flannel shirt as Wade watch intensely with his eyes locked onto his chest.
"No, pretty sure it's just you, Mr.Jackman," he was disappointed to see that Logan was wearing a fitted, black undershirt below that one though, "You need some help getting out of that next one? Yeah c'mon, let's get you nice and cool and comfortable..."
Wade eagerly started to reach for him but just ended up with Logan's flannel being roughly tossed at him.
"Nah, this is good. Feel better already," Logan groaned in relief as he stretched out his arms, pulling the shirt tight against the muscles of his upper body and nearly giving Wade a nosebleed from the sight.
"Suit yourself....Fucking tease," Wade muttered as he folded up Logan's flannel shirt to set on the ground beside them before looking up and finding a perplexed frown now on the man's face.
"The fuck is that sound?" He grumbled as Wade listened to the array of chirping noises coming from the nearby pond.
"Frogs. Probably mating season. Beautiful, isn't it? You're currently experiencing the wonders of nature and the sounds of a bunch of frogs fucking each other's brains out."
"Well it's annoying. Do somethin' about it."
Without another word Wade pulled out a gun and fired it in the direction of the pond, instantly halting all noise and now making the air around them eerily quiet. Logan looked at him in surprise for a moment before breaking into a grin as he chuckled and allowed his body to fall back into the grass.
"Thanks, bub. Much better not havin' to sit here listening to that shit," he sighed in contentment as he folded his arms behind his head, the sound of silence literally music to the ears of a man with a heightened sense of hearing.
"Frogs need love too, you know? Just like people. Though I don't think frogs feel that sense of love like humans do, but we are the higher life form after all. Just the need to feel that connection and acceptance from another human being is the greatest thing we can share. I think everyone deserves that."
When Wade wasn't babbling nonsense, he could actually say some thought-provoking things that could get Logan's mind to reflect on. He had said some regrettable things in the past that had likely caused Wade to consider his own worth and thinking about all of that immediately brought a sense of guilt.
A sobering look came over Logan's features as he stared up at the clear night sky from where he lay before his voice broke the silence.
"I'm sorry, ya know."
Wade immediately turned to him with a confused expression. That was the last thing he had expected to come out of him in this moment.
"Huh? The fuck are you talking about? You're sorry? Sorry for what?"
Logan cleared his throat and shook his head, trying better to gather his thoughts.
"For the way I blew up on you.....Ranted at you.....In the van, remember? Saying what an annoying moron you are.....That I wished you'd die alone. All that."
Wade's face softened. He hadn't held a grudge from that fight they had had and had never once wished for Logan to apologize to him.
"Ah that's all water under the bridge. I deserved it any how. Besides, you and I are cool now! Totally inseparable. Two crazy peas in a sexy pod called life. The best of friends, right?"
A small smile flickered across Logan's face as he nodded, doing his best to speak clearly despite how the booze was fogging his mind.
"Yeah, we are. But no....No, you didn't deserve that. I crossed a line that I shouldn't have. Was just so angry at what a piece o' shit I am that I took it all out on you. So I just want you to hear it from me....I'm sorry and I didn't mean anything I said," his eyes went down in shame and Wade leaned towards him to pat him on the thigh.
"I know you didn't, pal. And let's get one thing straight, I don't think you're a piece of shit. You proved that to everybody, including yourself. Now let's keep a positive mindset here, I don't want to hear you ever refer to yourself that way again, got it?" Wade playfully scolded but also Logan could sense that he was serious.
"Yeah, alright, I'll try. It's hard to imagine myself as being anything better. I guess thanks for thinkin' I'm not a piece of shit."
Wade gave a nod of acknowledgement before looking away to process that interaction. Logan wasn't much to overshare like Wade and could be very hard to read at times, but every day that they spent together it seemed like the clawed mutant would show him a little something new of what went on in his mind.
Drunk Logan had proved to be the most revealing, but he had his other sober moments too. It was a slow process, snail pace even, but Wade was still more than happy with the progress that he was making with him and vowed to never give up on him no matter what.
"But let's get one more thing straight, I still think you're an annoying moron."
Logan's asshole comment had broken the silence of Wade's personal reflection, triggering him immediately back to his normal character. He quickly turned back to him with a playful glare to rival the proud smirk displayed on the other man's face.
"Ah ha, there he is. I knew that prick was still in there. The snarky little honey badger that I know and love. You know you're pretty lucky to have someone like me around who puts up with all of your shit," Wade grinned as he reached down to begin teasingly poking at Logan's ribs, not expecting anything out of it.
Much to his surprise the normally gruff man instantly shot his arms down to guard his sides and started to squirm and even giggle from his actions.
"Hehehehe-Ya knew whahahat you signed uhuhup for, bub," Logan did little to stop it as his arm just pitifully made attempts to block out the merc's finger.
"Oh I'm not complaining. I will gladly take all of it like a good boy. Though now I'm curious as to why you're so twitchy all of a sudden. Is it epilepsy? Some form of Tourette's? Tell me what ails you, my precious," Wade teased, waiting on the excuses that Logan was sure to come up with because God forbid the Wolverine admit that he's--
"You're tihihickling meheeheehee, idiot," Logan growled half-heartedly between endless giggles, writhing about as the lone finger poked and wiggled into his side without pause.
Wade's mind nearly exploded, not expecting Logan to outright admit to any kind of weakness so easily as small as it may be. The alcohol definitely had to have played a part in him being so open and not trying to hide it.
"Get the fuck out of here. You're actually ticklish? Just when I thought you couldn't get any cuter, you go and drop this bomb on me?"
"I'm nohohot cute, ya crazy fuhuhuhuck," Logan chuckled with his face all scrunched up in a blissful grin while he squirmed in his submissive position, indeed looking absolutely adorable to the merc.
"I hate to break it to you, but yes you are. Look at you, you're the epitome of the tough, stoic manly man but yet here you are giggling without a care and completely helpless to the soft touch of just one little finger. They go crazy on Tumblr for fan fics written about that kind of thing, ya know."
"Wha-Whahahahahat?"
Wade always got a kick out of all the times he was successful in confusing Logan. Which was literally dozens of times per day, but it really wasn't hard to do so considering the man rarely used the internet in his lifetime.
"I'm just saying you're a hot topic online. Even all those people know your potential for being adorable."
"Do thehehey know your p-potential for bein' the mohohost obnoxious mahahan alive?"
"Pardon? I didn't quite catch that. Care to say that to my face?" Wade stopped for a minute to give him a chance to reply without struggle as Logan blinked up at him.
"Love to. But I'm afraid I couldn't tell your face from your ass if you put a gun to my hehehehead," he started to laugh again, reflexively curling half-way up as Wade returned to poking at his side.
"Well that wasn't a very nice thing to say. I think a little payback is in order. Now what would be a suitable punishment for that? Hmmm, I'm sure it will come to me," Wade smirked and introduced the rest of the fingers on his hand as they pried deep into the muscles to access the ribs beneath, increasing the volume of his friend's laughter.
"Ohohohoho fuhuhuck, Waahaade. Ahahahahah-C'mohohohohooon. Don't dohoohoo thahahahaat," Logan chuckled helplessly and rolled on his back, swatting with very little power behind it at Wade's hand.
"Don't do what? Oh, you mean this? Why not? Is da big, mean, tough guy Wolverine a wittle ticklish?" Wade's speech dwindled into baby-talk with intentions to embarrass and fluster his friend, but Logan was too drunk to feel any shame.
"I ahahaha-already tohohohold you I ahaham. Ahahare ya deheheaf? Open your fuhuhuhuckin' ears why dohohon't yaHAHAhAhahaha!" Logan yelped through his laughter once Wade tickled momentarily harder into his upper ribs.
"You are such a sassy mister. Definitely not a smart move for a ticklish person in your position. And you're not even putting in much effort to stop me. IIIIIIIInteresting.....," Wade mused aloud while Logan shook his head.
"I'm druhuhuhunk. Whahahah-Whahahaddya want frohohohom mehehehehe?"
"I don't know, I was just expecting a little more protest from you. The Logan I know would have skewered me immediately!"
Suddenly Wade pulled his hand back as he scooted closer to hover above where Logan lay.
"Come on now, let's see you defend yourself," Wade grinned as he began waving his hands in random and erratic patterns over Logan, pretending to reach in to touch him only to change direction at the last moment, "Oooooh look out! Ol' crazy Wade is gonna get you! But 'where' is the question! Should we go for that tempting tummy of yours? Or perhaps another rib attack? I'm sensing those armpits may be a killer spot."
Meanwhile Logan was just giggling uncontrollably the entire time from the anticipation while batting at the threatening hands, his body jerking away every time it looked like Wade was actually going to touch him even though he hadn't yet.
"Fuhuhuckin' knock that off. Someone's gonna seeheehee this shit."
"There's no one here but us, buddy. No knight in shining armor is going to bust out of the trees to save you like in the movies," Wade grinned as he transformed into his best Don LaFontaine impression, "In a world where dangerous mutants roam the Earth one man known as the Wolverine risks his life to save all of mankind. But what happens when he has to go up against his greatest foe? Don't miss the heart-stopping blockbuster movie of the summer, 'Wolverine Vs. The Tickle Monster'."
Wade beamed with pride when his words managed to make Logan start to laugh harder, though he knew that feat was always a lot easier when the man had been drinking. Still, he was going to take this as a win.
"Fuhuhucking idiot.....Ya tihihickle mehee and I'll kihihill you," Logan tried to growl as he grabbed at Wade's wrists but was too uncoordinated to hold onto them while Wade continued pretending to tickle and poke at him.
"Ahhh, some of the usual generic threats of death that I hear on a daily basis. Fake yawn. Any other cliche phrases you care to throw at me before I call your bluff, handsome?"
"I'm gonnahahaa hand some of theheeheese fihihists to your face!" He sputtered out as Wade's eyes widened in surprise, always finding joy in whenever Logan made a joke using a play on his words.
"Good one, Peanut. Looks like my humor is finally starting to rub off on you."
"Ya know whahat else ya can rub ohohoff? Thihihis dick!"
Oh, how Wade wished he had been recording this moment.
"No take backs! Full disclosure, I'm so going to remind you later that you said that, but for now I've got just one thing to say to you," Wade's grin grew as he leaned in closer to whisper to his quarry, "Hey Logan..."
"Whahahat?"
"Coochiecoochiecoochiecoo!" Wade belted out as he launched both hands onto Logan's waist, scratching and scribbling his fingers like crazy into the sensitive flesh.
With that Logan completely let loose as his head flung back and his mouth opened into a wide grin, releasing the heartiest laughter that Wade had ever heard.
"BwahahahahahaahaaNooohahahahahaha!"
Wade's mind reeled, not expecting that glorious of a reaction and he decided to see how much farther he'd be able to take this unexpected scenario.
"Holy shit, you are ticklish! Even more so than in all the fics I've read written by the illustrious fluffyficsanddreams!" Wade turned towards the audience, "Seriously folks, go read them, and also check out their cute Poolverine art. They're fucking so adorable."
"Quihihit tahahalkin' to yoursehehehelf, ya nuhuhut johohob!"
"Oh, if you only knew, Peanut. There's so much in this world that you have yet to learn. Oh! I suppose this is the part where I should offer you the chance to beg for mercy now?"
"Fuhuhuhuhuuuck yoooooouuuu!"
"Fuck me? I'm not the one who is fucked here, bucko. You're the one whose adorable weakness has been found out by someone with a black belt in tickling," Wade demonstrated with his fingers buzzing and vibrating up and down Logan's ribs while the man futilely clamped his arms down, unable to stop him.
"A blahahack behehelt in beheehehee- bein' a pahahain in my ahahahahass!" Logan let out a snort amongst his laughing; the sound causing Wade to beam down at him in adoration.
The butterflies in his stomach were going crazy with how Logan had literally surrendered to this without incident.
"I can tell you that smart ass remarks are just going to entice me to keep tickling you. Unless of course that's been your plan all along. Is that it? You wanted me to tickle the ever-living fuck out of you this entire time?! Well why didn't you say so?! Of course, I'd be honored!"
His hands forcibly shoved their way deep into Logan's armpits, making him arch his back off the ground and roar with booming laughter.
"Nooooohohohohooooo! I-I swehehear I dihihidn't plahahahaaan thihihiis! Hahahahaahaa!"
Wade chuckled, not expecting him to take his obviously joking words so seriously.
"I'm just teasing you, big guy. Besides I'm not letting you take credit for the best idea I've had in a long time. Hehe, pretty ticklish in the pits, aren't you? Just listen to that laugh of yours. Super cute! Though at this point I'm convinced you would laugh no matter where I tickled you."
"Prohahahably!" Logan shrugged, not denying anything while helplessly kicking his feet against the ground and writhing from the intensity of the relentless tickling, "Nohohow fuhuhuck ooooff!!"
"No can do. I guarantee you're waaaay overdue for a good tickling. It's a crime that you've gone so long without. So buckle up, cutie, and get ready to laugh like you never have before," his fingers wriggled even faster under the feral man's arms as Logan spasmed and howled, knowing that this wasn't stopping any time soon.
"Ya bahahahastard! Eeeheheheheheehee! Gehehehet outta theheheheere!"
"Awww, but I like it in here. You're absolutely right though. Let's move on and see if there are any other spots that can beat this one," his hands pulled free from the armpits as they scraped down his sides to now start to claw into his lower abdomen.
Logan let out a surprising squeak and instantly curled up, bringing his knees nearly to his chest as he blocked Wade access to his stomach. The grin on Wade's face quickly turned even more mischievous, knowing he'd just hit the jackpot.
"Oh no no no no, you're not keeping that juicy little spot from me....," he grabbed Logan's legs to shove them out of the way as he quickly jumped on top to mount him and pin him down. He didn't miss a beat as his hands immediately flew back to the man's belly and resumed furiously tickling the newfound hyper-sensitive spot.
Logan couldn't stop the embarrassing squeal that exploded out of him as he laughed hysterically, thrashing with what little strength he had left to try to get away.
"WAAHAAHaHAhaHade!! Dohohohohoon't!! AhahahahahaFuhuhuhuuuck! Nohohot thehehehere!"
"Awww what's the matter? Are these ridiculously muscly abs of yours not doing anything to keep the big bad tickles out? Oh, isn't that just terrible," Wade smirked big time and pushed Logan's shirt up to get a look at how the hirsute muscles twitched and spasmed under the assault of his fingers.
Logan frantically shoved at Wade's arms as he bucked underneath him, but he was too weak from laughter and the alcohol still in his system and couldn't budge the merciless merc.
"Pleeehehehehehehease!" He snorted incessantly between giggly shrieks and wheezes, "Stohohohooop! I'm- I'm gohohohohonna diiiihihihiiiieeeehehehehee!"
Wade couldn't help laughing not only at the absurdity of that coming from a mutant whose powers prevented him from dying, but also because he could have never imagined in a million years getting Logan to beg even in the slightest.
He had never seen Logan so overstimulated like this before other than when he was in one of his berserker rages while attacking an enemy. His anger was clearly on the opposite end of the spectrum of whatever this would be considered though, and it was so refreshing to be able to see him in this new light.
The best part was that Logan hadn't even tried to really stop Wade from doing any of this to him. Naturally Logan had blamed it on his current intoxication, but Wade got the feeling that it was something else.
Normally if Logan didn't agree with something then he would let you know it, drunk or not. Wade glanced at his roommate's hands to see his adamantium claws nowhere in sight and still safely concealed inside his forearms as said hands pathetically tried to block Wade from getting at his super ticklish stomach.
Wade could only smile as he gazed down at Logan's face, completely flushed red with tears squeezing from his eyes and his mouth open wide in a crazed grin that was releasing the most adorable sounds that Wade had ever heard him make. Wade had tickled many people before and the face he saw here wasn't the one of a man who was suffering.
It was all too clear to Wade now. Wolverine was having fun.
"Technically speaking, we're all slowly dying every day, but alright, I suppose one needs air to breathe," he ended up removing his hands from Logan's sensitive tummy, giving him a satisfied smirk, "So you had enough, tough guy? Have I got you thinking about being a little nicer to me now?"
Logan panted and gasped for air before finally looking up at Wade with a glimmer in his eye as a defiant grin spread across his face.
"Fuckin' never.....happening....I ain't....that drunk."
Wade decided that in no universe would he ever let such a cocky response like that slide and came to the conclusion that Logan more than deserved what was about to come next.
"I knew you were a glutton for punishment, Wolvie, but I don't think you realize what you've just gotten yourself into. Now I didn't want to have to do this, but you've forced my hands. Or should I say....," Wade hopped off of him to the side and yanked Logan's shirt up more before burying his face into his hairy stomach as he started blowing the loudest, wettest sounding raspberries imaginable.
Logan had tried to prep himself for more of what Wade had previously done, but this new technique made all of that look like child's play. It overwhelmed him to the point that he literally saw stars for a moment as he opened his mouth to scream from the first blow, but it had completely taken his breath away and not a sound came out.
After what seemed like an eternity he frantically sucked in some air until finally he begin laughing at the top of his lungs.
"AaAHAhAhhaHaah! Hahahahahahshihihihiihiiiiit!! The fuhuhuuck ahahare you doohoohoooing?!?"
He had zero defense as Wade laid across him to hold him down on his back and continued his quest of covering Logan's entire stomach and sides with the ticklish blows against his skin.
"They're called- PBBBT- raspberries, you poor- PBBBBT- sheltered man. They're a very- PBBBBBT- powerful weapon. PBBBBBBT! And I wasn't- PBBBBT- serious, by the way. PBBBBBBBBT! I totally- PBBT- wanted- PBBBBT- to do this- PBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBT!"
Each and every blow sent a shockwave through Logan's body that made him want to jump out of his own skin. It was literally the most unbearable thing he had ever endured in his life, which was saying a lot considering all that he had experienced.
Though as desperate as he was to get away, in the back of his mind he didn't really mind if he was unable to either. He couldn't recall the last time he'd ever laughed even close to this much and it just felt........good. Really good.
Even with his face burning and the tears leaking down his cheeks from all the hysterical laughter he found himself feeling more than content. The whole situation was completely harmless and good-natured, and he could smell the immense joy Wade was getting out of it too.
As it had progressed, he felt his remaining burdens becoming insignificant as he literally laughed his cares away. He just let it all go, and his mind felt completely free for the first time in as long as he could remember.
And he was grateful. No one had given him the time of day in what felt like forever nor had put such effort into his happiness except for Wade. He would never be able to fully express how thankful he was that this idiot had barged into his life and gave him a reason to carry on.
Despite all that he realized though, the raspberries tickled like fuck, and he couldn't stop himself from begging for mercy.
"Fuhuhuhuhuck! No mohohohohore! AAhahahahhahahahaah! Wahahaaade! I caahahahahahaha- I can't tahahahaake ihihiiit! Pleeheheheheheeease!"
Of course, Wade acted as if he didn't hear a word he said and just carried on with his teasing.
"Do you- PBBBT- have any idea- PBBBBT- how many people- PBBT PBBBBT- would kill to be in my place? PBBBBBT! Your sexy abs and I- PBBBBT- are practically making out," he paused to give him a slight breather, but also to marvel out loud at his next target, "Ohhh, what have we here? What an adorable little innie you've got! That deserves some extra personal attention, don't you think?"
Logan's eyes went wide as he pleadingly and vigorously shook his head, anticipating that this was about to be the most ticklish part of all.
"NO! For fucks sake, please! D-Don't do it! I'm begging you! I'll do anything!"
Wade absolutely relished in hearing Logan plead for his life, but his chaotic mind had already made its choice. It also didn't help Logan's case that he had a giddy smile on his face and was giggling between his words the whole time he was begging for leniency.
Wade was all too happy to oblige and not disappoint him. Displaying the most evil grin, he took a deep inhale before planting his lips right onto Logan's navel and blowing with everything he had in him.
Logan could only desperately wheeze for a breath to even make a sound that resembled a laugh as he weakly smacked at Wade's head while even more raspberries sounded off circling all around his navel. He barely managed to whisper out what Wade translated as a "Stop", but other than that he just laid their quivering in his silent, blissful agony.
However, in that moment he decided that if this was how he died it wouldn't be the worst way for him to go; with a trusted friend at his side and the happiest he had been in a long time. He was too out of it to realize that the sensations had finally stopped until Wade's voice snapped him back to reality.
"Alright relax, you big lug. We're done. Look...I stopped," Wade began gently rubbing his belly to try to calm him down, but Logan was far too sensitive for that as he curled up and kept giggling uncontrollably before Wade finally removed his hand entirely.
The drunk and giggle-filled daze overwhelmed him, though the tickle attack had sobered him slightly, as he laid back and tried to shake some clarity into his head. Finally after a few moments he was able to regain his bearings as he looked up at Wade with a lopsided grin spreading onto his face.
"Fuckin' prick. Why'd ya do that?"
Wade returned his smile with an exaggerated shrug.
"Because sometimes opportunity knocks but once. The last thing I ever expected was for you to be so ticklish and there was absolutely zero fucking chance that I was going to pass that up. You totally asked for those raspberries though. I was all ready to cut you a break and you just had to rile me up some more," he playfully ruffled the other man's already unruly hair as he managed to sit up.
"You're crazier than you look if you ever thought I'd let ya get the last word in," Logan shook his head as he gave Wade a light-hearted shove before fumbling with his shirt to pull it back down.
"Well I can attest that your stubbornness is no match for my crazy. You now know that firsthand so try me again sometime if you dare. I welcome it for the record."
"Consequences are the last thing I'm thinkin' about when I'm all boozed up, but shit, I wasn't expectin'....that. No one's ever done that to me before.....Tickled me like that."
"Well fuck me if I'm lying, but I'm not surprised. You are a little temperamental and most people probably thought you would make with the stabbing if they tried it," Wade regretted saying that instantly as Logan's face fell slightly.
"That's just what I've always been good at, I guess....Makin' people afraid of me and pushing them away. Look where all that got me."
Wade cussed himself out inside his head, always hating himself for the times that something that came out of his mouth caused Logan to feel down. He had to counter that immediately!
"No no no, we were doing so well. Don't you dare get sucked back into your depressive little cloud. I forbid it!"
Before Logan could dwell in that feeling for too long Wade sprang back into action as he pounced and viciously tickled Logan's ribs, instantly breaking him into uncontrollable laughter once more.
"Wah-Waahaahaait! Okaahahaahaay! I'm sohohohorry! AhahaahahI'll do behehehetter!" Logan laughed as he struggled to push the other man off and ended up on his back again.
"Don't be sorry, just promise me. Promise me that you're not ever going to let those dark thoughts beat you. I'm not stopping until I'm thoroughly convinced. Go on, you have the floor," Wade teased, fingers drilling into his armpits now and making Logan spasm and squeal in an uncharacteristically high-pitched tone.
"Yes yes! I- Hahahaha- I prohohoho-promise! Ohoho shihihiit! I swehehehear-hehehehehehe! I'll wohohork ohohohon ihihihiit! Nohohow geh-get offa mehehehee, ya dihihickhead! Pleeheeheeheease!"
Wade laughed himself, still so charmed at the sight of seeing the fearsome Wolverine so helpless to simple tickles.
"Well that's all that I can ask is that you try. I have complete faith in you though," he halted his attack and backed off, "Alright, now don't let that smile leave your face because I will not hesitate to tickle you until the sun comes up."
"Heheheh, you're fuckin' out of your mind, Wilson," Logan chuckled and pushed himself up off the ground back into a sitting position.
"Have we just met? You love me and you know it. I can see right through you, my little Loganberry," Wade gave him one last rib poke, drawing out a snort as Logan swatted his hand.
"Alright alright, enough with that shit. I'm gonna piss my pants if ya keep that up."
"Sorry Gramps, I forgot you old geezers have weak bladders. And I noticed that you didn't deny that you love me in any of that," the merc probed, wanting to see what his friend's response would be as Logan took a moment to think before replying.
"Well I wouldn't use that word, but.......something kinda like that, I guess," Logan tried to hold back his smile from growing any larger as Wade just beamed, knowing that was probably the best answer he could ever hope to get.
"I accept your profession of your love. Or maybe I'll see if I can get a better confession the next time that I tickle you."
".....What do you mean 'next time'?" Logan glanced over warily, though not sounding as concerned as he tried to be, which Wade latched onto immediately.
"Oh my little naive Wolvie, you know that there's no way this was just a one-time thing. The way you laugh is so motherfucking cute and I need to hear more. Especially those piggy snorts of yours."
"You really have such a simple mind," Logan rolled his eyes, though turned his head slightly to hide the blush on his cheeks, "Just go easy on me, huh? I am a senior citizen, ya know."
"In mind yes, but in body......," Wade lifted Logan's shirt for another peek as his eyes hazed over and scanned up and down the muscular wall, "Ohoho mama, absolutely prime and delectable..."
"You're still not getting in my pants, Wade....," Logan snorted and slapped Wade's hand away to release him, making the merc groan.
"Hey Mr. Buzzkill, a man is entitled to his own flagrant fantasies, thank you very much."
"Sounds like an uneducated wish if I ever heard one," his smirk was overbearing, and Wade had to hold himself back from physically retaliating.
"I'll warn you, just know that I am this close to wrecking your holier-than-thou ass again if you don't tone it down a notch."
"Fair enough," Logan chuckled as he got to his feet, picking up his flannel shirt on the way, "Whaddya say we head on home now. I'm about ready to crash out for the next two days."
"What a grand idea! Now why didn't I think of that?!" Wade sarcastically replied and followed suit as they started to walk, "See if you would have just cooperated and let me drag you back home in the first place then your ticklish secret would've still been safe for another day."
Logan shrugged unapologetically.
"Wasn't trying to hide it. Like I said, I never been tickled much. Didn't know it could be that intense," he let out a nervous laugh and shook his head a little.
"I thought you deserved the full experience, and out of the kindness of my cancer-filled heart I was more than happy to oblige. So what did you think, huh? Did you like it? You liked it, huh? Don't try to lie," Wade teased and poked at his side, causing Logan's smile to stretch out a little further while his arm moved to guard himself.
Strangely he did enjoy it on a certain level, but there was no way he was going to fully admit to that even if he was still feeling pretty buzzed. Wade would never leave him alone if he did.
"Wouldn't say that, but it was.......tolerable, I guess."
"Well I'm glad you didn't hate it. You don't laugh like that very often and you didn't seem upset by it so I took the liberty. I wasn't trying to torture you though. I mean, if it looked like you were in true distress I wouldn't have pushed it so far," Wade explained, hoping he really hadn't done anything to cause his friend any grief.
"Yeah, I know. I could hardly stand it towards the end, but I ain't laughed that much in a long time so.......wasn't all bad," he nodded while Wade's heart swelled at having received some form of gratitude from the usually gruff man.
"It was totally my pleasure. And I really hope you have this same energy later, starting with when I give you a wakeup call this afternoon," he grinned impishly as Logan turned to give him the sternest look he could manage in the moment with his trademark brow raised.
"Don't make me lock your ass out of the apartment again. At least lemme sleep until the sun goes back down again," his eyes squinted as he glanced at his watch to see it was around 3:45am now.
"It's a deal. You will be entitled to pure, uninterrupted sleep until dusk. No bullshit. Hmm, now here's a totally unrelated question, but you usually sleep barefoot, don't you? You know, without shoes or socks or any protection on your feet whatsoever?"
Wade couldn't hold back the rush of pleasure he got when he saw Logan's body tense up before attempting another half-ass glare towards him.
"Wade no. I will knock your fuckin' teeth into your skull if you go anywhere near my feet. That's a promise," he managed a growl this time though it lacked its usual ferocity behind it.
"Whaaat? It was just an innocent question. You think I have some kind of ulterior motive behind it? Haha, don't be silly. I am insulted by your lack of trust in me," he made sure to take a more than obvious glance down at Logan's boot-attired feet while they walked along, knowing it would keep him on edge.
"Motherfucker.....Have I ever told ya how much I hate you?" Logan just sighed as he walked ahead a little, not wanting Wade to see the small smile that he was trying to fight down.
"Only about twenty-two times today! But the one time you admitted that you actually kind of sort of love me cancels all of those out. Mic drop! Game point! In your face, bub!" Wade caught up and threw an arm around him to pull him close so he could plant a loud smooch on the side of his head.
Surprisingly Logan didn't push him away in disgust nor try to deny anything that Wade had just said. Maybe it was just the alcohol influencing him, but he just went along with it all and accepted that this was his life now. And truthfully, it was the best thing to ever happen to him.
Every day that he spent in this universe would bring about something new and positive. He had a home again. Friends that he could turn to. A completely new beginning, and a far cry to the life he had left behind him.
And then there was Wade. The crazy lunatic of a man that gave him all his undying devotion and support for absolutely no reason that Logan felt that he was deserving of. He had only shown him the smallest vulnerability of his inner mentality that made Wade instantly fall head over heels and ultimately decide that Logan was worth caring about.
Wade was slowly picking him apart and then putting him back together to make him better than he had ever been. He made him feel okay with opening himself up more without judgement because like it or not Wade was honestly one of the few people in existence that could understand where he was coming from.
Sure Wade was always turning most things into one big fucking joke, and despite how much the merc could get on Logan's last nerve he did understand when certain things needed a more serious approach. And really Logan couldn't fault him for being the way that he was for he had come to realize that that was Wade's unique way of coping with his own trauma and instabilities.
Secretly, he admired that Wade was able to still find humor in life despite his rough past and that gave him hope that maybe he too could learn to shut himself off like that once in a while. The booze always helped him loosen up and be closer to that state of mind, but he'd like not having to rely on that bandaid for the rest of his life.
For whatever it was worth, he'd make the best of it and not let these short moments of levity go to waste.
"Are you paying attention? Hey Lo! I'm still talking here!"
Playful fingers briefly clawing into his stomach brought him out of his head as he barked out a laugh and tried to squirm away, but Wade held him close. His eyes then looked up to meet the grinning face of the other man.
"Sorry, was spacing out. Still a bit drunk, ya know," he smiled a crooked grin that revealed one of his enlarged canine teeth on the side of his mouth.
"Oh, I'm very aware. Even with your healing factor I know it takes a while to run all of that alcohol out of your system. You were being pretty quiet though."
"I was just thinking, is all,"
"About what? Was it me? I'll bet it was me. Tell me it was me," Wade jokingly nudged him, not expecting the nod that Logan gave.
"Yeah, actually I was,"
"You were....- Huh?!" Wade exclaimed as he did a double-take, "The- The fuck did you just say? You really were thinking about me? Don't lie and toy with my emotions like that, it's not funny."
"Ain't lyin' though. You've honestly helped me a lot, Wade. More than you'd ever know because I never told ya," Logan paused as he tried to recollect his thoughts, "Mmm, I'm not really that good with words as you're familiar, but you're the closest person I've had to a friend in a long time. And I don't know if you can tell but you've genuinely made me feel really happy and I just wanna- "
"I do," Wade blurted out, cutting off Logan's speech as his face instantly went sober and stared back at him in total confusion. Several long awkward moments passed until Logan was able to even respond.
"....What?"
"Oh uhhh....Hehe, was that not the start of a marriage proposal? I guess I read that situation all horribly fucking wrong as usual. My bad. Sorry, please continue," Wade sputtered out, but was pleased to see that instead of rolling his eyes Logan was shaking his head in amusement.
"Weird ass motherfucker. I'm kinda scared to know what other crazy fantasies ya have about me in that messed up head of yours."
"Well if you ever get the proverbial nerve, I'd be more than happy to act them out with you," he still had his arm around Logan as he put on his best sultry voice while giving him a suggestive wink, "Interested? At least a little curious? It's not gay if it's with your best friend."
"Like I said before, no amount of alcohol," Logan laughed softly and finally pushed Wade's arm off of him.
"Never say never. Now what was it you were going to tell me before my intrusive thoughts interrupted you?"
Logan thought about it quietly but only ended up shaking his head.
"Ah, nevermind. The moment has passed."
Wade dove into instant protest mode.
"Noooo! No, it hasn't. Just say it."
"Nah. It won't have the same effect. Just forget it."
"Aww c'mon! Tell me! I don't want things to have to get messy. Need I remind you that I now know exactly how to get you talking...."
Wade didn't have to demonstrate his intentions. Logan knew what he meant as a tingle ran up his spine before he looked sheepishly over at the other man.
"It's gonna be like that, huh?"
"Abso-fucking-lutely. So you've now got five seconds to spill it before I get you pinned back down on the ground and laughing those gorgeous, big, bouncing titties off. Hurry now, you don't have much time.....Five....."
"Shit," Logan chuckled and rubbed a hand over his face, "It's gonna sound pretty fuckin' lame though."
"I'd never refer to anything sentimental coming out of you as being 'lame'. Whatever it is I will hold it near and dear to my heart forever and ever. Now quit stalling. My patience is running thin, and my fingers are itching for some action. Four....."
"Fucking Christ.....Alright, ya win. I was just gonna say.......Ya know with all the effort ya put into a piece o' shit like me I- "
"THREE-TWO-ONE!"
The next thing Logan knew he was tackled onto the grass with Wade wasting no time in pulling up his t-shirt again to home in on his exposed stomach and start tickling the life out of him.
"Hehehehey! Whahahat the hehehell?!" Logan yelped in surprise through his laughter and fought to push his tormentor away, "Aahahahahahah! Fuhuhuhucker! I was- was gohohohonna tell yahahaha!"
"Don't you remember back at the beginning of this fic when I told you never to refer to yourself that way again? As a piece of shit? Obviously you need some persuasion to not think like that. By the way, this totally has nothing to do with me just looking for a reason to tickle the shit out of you again," his fingers scribbled all over the formed ab muscles and dug into his lower ribs, making Logan arch his back and squeal like a little kid.
"I'm- hahahahaha- I'm sohohorry! It's a haahaahaahabit! Gi-heeheehehehee- Gimme ahahahanother chahahaahaance!"
"I forgive you, of course. But since I'm here I might as well check something out that I was eyeing earlier....Wondering if you're just as sensitive in the old dick root," Wade moved his hands lower and pried his wiggling fingers into the creases of the V-muscle on Logan's lower abdomen with first contact instantly driving the man wild.
"SHIT!! SHITSHITSHIT!! NOSTOP!! STOHAHAHAHAHHAHOP!!" Logan shrieked in laughter and bucked frantically in trying to dislodge Wade's hands while they remained in place and just continued gently squeezing and massaging into the areas.
"Well that answers that question. I'm very tempted to see where these inviting paths will lead down to, but we're trying to keep it more PG-13 here. Damn, it looks like that tickles pretty bad, huh? Did I just find your ultimate weak spot?"
"FUHUHUHUCK! HELP! HEHEHEHELP!" Logan suddenly squealed in desperation while Wade just laughed at his uncharacteristic reactions and secured his grip on the thrashing mutant.
"Silly boy, I already told you, no one is going to save you. You belong to ME, mwahahaha! Now I'm almost certain that you were just about to tell me something?"
"I-I CAHAHAHAHAHAAAN'T!" Logan wailed as he shook his head, losing his mind to the unbearable tickles and frantically trying to wriggle away.
"You totally can. I believe in you and so does the audience."
"STAHAHAHAHAAAP!"
"Talk!"
"WAHAHAHAADE PLEHEHEHEHEEASE!!"
"JAMES LOGAN HOWLETT YOU SPIT IT OUT RIGHT NOW OR I SWEAR ON JOHNNY STORM'S GRAVE THAT I'M GOING TO LITERALLY TICKLE YOU TO DEATH!" Wade took a deep breath as he eye-fucked Logan's navel and started to lean his head down towards it.
"TH-THANK YOU!"
The tickling immediately stopped as Wade stared down at the other man in astoundment while Logan tried to catch his breath and repeated his words more clearly.
"Tha....Thank you. I was just.....gonna say....thank you......Fuck."
".....Thanks? To me? Errrm, I know you were starting to say earlier, but maybe you can tell me again what you could possibly be thanking me for?"
Wade was still confused and feeling in denial that anyone would find him helpful as Logan put a hand up and laid his other on top of his chest, taking deep inhales.
"Gi-Give me....a minute.....Ya almost....killed me..."
"Sorry about that, but for the record I'd totally do it again," Wade couldn't help snickering at the thought, "Take your time though."
It was another minute before Logan finally got his breath back and his eyes cleared to focus on the man patiently hovering over him.
"Alright, here it goes. I might be forgettin' a few things, but it's things that mean a lot to me actually. I just wanted to say thanks for being my friend. For looking at me as a man when no one else would. And believing in me. For pullin' me out of the grave I'd already dug for myself and forcing me to face the world again. For making me realize that my story isn't over yet and giving me hope for the future. For showing me what it feels like to be happy again. For making me laugh, and not just with the stupid tickling torture. Either you're dumbing me down to your level or maybe you really have just been funny this entire time."
"I assure you it's the latter, but.....Wow, holy fucking shit. Sorry, not many people ever speak about me with such regard. Usually people are just angrily yelling at me to 'shut the fuck up'."
Logan winced slightly as he sat up, knowing he had been one of those people.
"Could I apologize for that?"
"No no, it's fine. I know I'm annoying and talk way too much so sometimes you have no choice. Undiagnosed-ADHD, ya know. So let me get this straight, are you saying that you actually.....like me? Like as a person? Because I'm not beating around the bush when I say that I genuinely do care about you. That's something I would never joke about," Wade's expression grew serious as he put on a shy smile and looked away, feeling Logan's big hand land gently on his shoulder.
"I know, Wade. So if you're ever gonna hear me say this now's the time.....I love ya, bub."
Wade's eyes immediately darted back over as a big smile slowly started to spread across his face. Logan may have still been a little under the influence, but he felt that one from his heart.
"I- I love you too, Logan. Feels nice to say that without it being one-sided," Wade shook his head in disbelief, receiving a reassuring squeeze from Logan's hand.
"Yeah well, I mean it, ya know. It's not an easy task, but you've more than earned my loyalty. I'd follow you to Hell and back, pal," Logan's eyes were soft as he smiled back at Wade and it was only then that Wade realized how close they were sitting and couldn't resist breaking the comfortable tension.
"So.....Are we going to kiss now?"
"Platonic love, ya fucker," Logan chuckled and pushed him away so he could get up off the ground, "You never give up, do ya?"
"They say you miss 100% of the shots that you don't take. You never know, one time you might just give in," Wade booped him on the nose as Logan grinned and smacked his hand away.
"Fat fuckin' chance. Now that ya got me to throw my bleeding heart on the ground, can we please go home so I can sleep?"
"We're already on our way. I'll even carry you still if you'd like," Wade offered as Logan chuckled and shook his head.
"Thanks, but no thanks. I gotta try to scrape together what little dignity I have left after all this shit."
"That's okay, you can have some of mine. Oh wait, I forgot, I never had any to begin with. Don't worry, once you're back to being totally sober and your normal ornery self you won't remember any of this," Wade assured him with gentle pats on his back as Logan snorted a laugh.
"I somehow doubt that. But maybe you can remind me every now and again," he smirked over at Wade who now had pure glee all over his face and looked like he was about to explode from the thought.
They continued walking for a while with satisfied silence between them until Logan had a stray thought pop back into his head.
"Hey Wade, just one more thing. Something ya mentioned earlier that I wanted to ask you about...."
"I'm all ears, buddy. Helpful Wade here is ready to answer any question you could ever have. Just lay it on me," Wade smiled encouragingly as Logan then turned to him with a questioning tilt of his head.
"What in the fuck is 'Poolverine'?"
