Old Wounds, New Respect
{This turned out to be much longer than expected, so a ‘read more’ to prevent your dash from becoming scroll hell.}
"You're a hard man to find, Carter."
His hands moved fast enough that the gesture was a blur, but there was restraint in the violence--the arrow he'd nocked didn't fly automatically. Slate looked past it at the tall Elonian, standing carelessly on damp leaves, and slowly lowered his bow. "Meant to be."
The eyes framed by gold-plated metal shifted and Cain held up both hands, fingers splayed, before he removed his hood. "And a man of many surprises. Where did you find that broken little flower?"
Slate glanced back quickly. The white-haired girl was still asleep, curled up beneath the only blanket that'd survived the recent incident with the campfire. He grunted wordlessly, leaning down to put the arrow back into the quiver.
Cain stepped around the mossy log and sat on it, tucking his hooded mask into his belt. "So this is where you ran off to. Decided to get as far from civilization as you could?"
"Yeah."
"You realize that no one knows where you are." Cain paused, drumming his fingertips on his knee. "And that no one can send you news when no one knows where you are."
The color didn't drain from Slate's face. It fell out of it, leaving him chalky beneath the tan. His eyes darted immediately to Cain and he took a step forward. "...Gwena...?"
"She's fine. No harm has come to her."
Slate didn't manage to sit. He tried to cover the abrupt collapse with an outflung hand, but it was pointless. Pulling his knees up, he leaned forward to lower his head, calming his raspy breathing with a few slow, carefully controlled breaths.
The Elonian watched silently, absently examining his nails. A dagger was drawn and he cleaned under each nail carefully, paring them down while keeping Slate in his peripheral vision. When the hunter finally leaned against the other log and let out a heavy sigh, Cain sheathed the dagger. "She signed the divorce papers."
Something tightened in Slate's face. "I expected her to."
"Did you?"
"Yes."
"Mm."
The hunter's scowl blackened. "That why ya came all th' way up here? Just to laugh at me 'bout it?"
"Carter, I am most certainly not laughing about it." He motioned towards the tent. "But again, I ask, where did you find that girl?"
"Wanderin' 'round up here by herself." Talking about her was a welcome distraction, even if Slate didn't know exactly what to say. He didn't know anything about her, in truth. "Doesn't seem quite right in th' head. Was walkin' 'round barefoot." His jaw tensed. "Somebody hurt her pretty bad."
Cain leaned to the right, looked past Slate at the sleeping figure and made a thoughtful sound. "I know a clinic that can take care of her. I'll take her to them if you'd like."
He squinted. "Who?"
"You know exactly who, Carter. The Sigenheim clinic in Ebonhawke. I know you and Hesperia were Vigil comrades."
Slate looked down and brushed a few leaves off of his breeches. "...she ain't well enough to climb down th' mountain on her own."
"I can handle transporting her. Necromancers aren't useless when it comes to keeping someone alive, Carter."
Again, Slate's jaw tightened. "I know."
"Yes, I imagine you do, don't you?" Cain shifted, sliding off of the log in order to lean against it, draping his arms back over the mossy surface. "While I'm upsetting you on every level, I may as well continue. Your house has been burned down. As well as the barn and most of the outbuildings."
The look on Slate's face made Cain sit up straight. A hint of glossy ice blue showed in his eyes, and he leaned forward, reaching out to lay a firm hand on the hunter's wrist. "Steady now. Don't pass out on me."
Slate pulled his wrist out from under Cain's hand. The hunter pulled himself to his feet and walked several paces away. His back was to Cain, but the Elonian could see the tension in his shoulders, the way his hands snapped into fists. A quick mental debate with himself and Cain shifted once again, perching on the log. He couldn't quite decide if Carter was going to snap in rage or burst into tears and it was rather exciting to not be certain.
As the silence drew out, Cain saw no discernable change in Carter's posture. A slight adjustment of how he was looking and he saw no difference in the man's life energy. It was still strong, still had that earthy steadiness that he'd first noted when they'd met, and was as subdued as he'd expected it to be, all things considered.
When Slate turned, Cain schooled his face into a calm neutrality, but the plain resignation in the hunter's eyes was ...extremely surprising. The hunter let out a slow breath and walked back to the log. Sat down and picked up the charred stick resting against the log. He stirred the coals, looking at the small sparks that flew as he did so, and let out another breath.
"Ethan know?"
"I expect so. I know he went to the homestead to try and get a head start on the summer's work." Cain didn't bother explaining how he knew. Information was his favorite collectible; there was no need to divulge how he managed to get it.
"He'll do best to sell th' place then," Slate said, his voice colorless.
The Elonian had intended to deliver a much more... impersonal lecture, but what he'd imagined he'd find was... not what he'd found. "Carter, you do realize that you're still alive, yes? You'll get over it. And when you do, you'll want to rebuild your home."
"Ain't a home." The hunter picked up a tin pot and poured water from a waterskin into it, settled the pot on the coals. "Just a place."
Cain let the silence hang as the water boiled. The two men sat quietly, watching the water and proving that the old proverb was wrong when the water boiled. Slate used a fold of his coat to pull it off of the coals, set the the pot aside and began preparing cups of tea. He handed one to Cain and set another near the coals, digging out a paper packet of sugar that was offered.
"Carter. While I recognize the signs of a man believing that life has finally defeated him, you have more spine than that."
Slate's eyes, reddish in hue from the coals' reflection, shifted to Cain but he remained silent, sipping his unsweetened tea.
The Elonian let out a slow breath. "You lost the woman you loved." A hint of anger edged his words. "And you think you're the first or the last? You think playing the hermit is going to do anything? Make a statement? She doesn't know that you're here mourning her alone, Carter. And, in all truth, I doubt you've crossed her mind all that often since you two parted ways." Cain was confident enough to lie blatantly, but Gwena had allowed him to kiss her. Had responded to it, and that gave just enough truth to let him speak with conviction.
"So you fell in love with a woman you couldn't possibly keep. Everyone does that at some point. We all reach for the sun and get burnt. Playing the martyr will do you no good and it won't get her back. It's over. You have a chance to start again, wiser now than you were before. Mourn if you must, but don't prove yourself an idiot by wasting your life doing it."
The hunter said nothing as he watched Cain. Just sipped again, the cup angling to let him drink without fully lifting the hardened leather mask covering the lower half of his face.
Every now and then, Cain felt pure frustration. It was an exotic experience when it came, even more so when it was colored with anger. And it welled now, bringing the Elonian's most distant, icy expression to the surface. "I never thought you so weak, Carter. Admitting defeat before your life is even over."
Deliberately, Slate reached up and unhooked his mask. Let it drop to his knee and bounce to the forest floor before he went back to sipping his tea.
Cain's eyes narrowed at the sight of the curving scars. "Who?"
"Blonde mesmer. Out by Doric. Ran across him fuckin' up a woman's body. Figure he prob'ly killed her. We got into it. Lost my huntin' knife in him." Slate didn't look at Cain as he gestured towards his face. "Left me with these."
"They're not bad scars. They'll fade in time and your tan will cover much of them."
Slate gave a one-shouldered shrug.
"Carter."
The tin cup was set down. Hard.
"Look. Ya came up here to find me. Ya found me. Came up to give me all th' bad news 'bout Gwena signin' th' papers and m' parents' place burnin' down. Added in yer lit'l lecture 'bout how weak I'm bein' and threw in th' whole 'I suffered more 'n ya' bit, too. Ya done?"
It was stated, not snapped. Said so colorlessly that Cain's brows arched involuntarily. He looked at the hunter for a rather tense moment before something shifted in his eyes. Putting his own tea down carefully, Cain leaned over and laid a hand on Slate's arm. "...I'm sorry, Carter."
It was genuine. It was sympathetic. And it caused Slate to drop his gaze as something in his face tightened again. They sat for a moment, unmoving, before Slate nodded his head, once.
Cain leaned back and picked up his tea, giving Slate the courtesy of an indirect gaze and letting the other man blot his eyes quickly with his sleeve.
"So ya can take th' lit'l bit back with ya?" Slate cleared his throat hoarsely and gestured towards the sleeping girl.
"I can. I'll bring her safely to Greystone." He turned the cup around in his hands. "Do you want me to tell... anyone where you can be found?"
"Letters 'll find me at Hoelbrak. Beyond that, ain't no reason to." The hunter rubbed his hands over his knees briskly. "If somethin' goes wrong with..." His throat worked once. "One o' th' boys, she'll prob'ly write. Other 'n that, I ain't got no call to be stickin' my nose in her life."
"...that's what you've decided?" The admiration in his gaze was begrudging but present.
"Yeah."
Cain nodded once. "I'll take the girl off of your hands, Carter. And I'll let Ethan know."
"A'ight. 'preciate it."
When the hunter rose, moving quietly around the little camp to pack up the few things he'd put aside for the white-haired girl, Cain shook his head once. He knew what it was to fight against reality, to hold to a pretense and ignore facts in favor of a beautiful delusion. He knew the pitfalls of it, where it led and the inevitable damage it caused.
And when he found people who recognized those pitfalls and took on reality, despite the pain it caused, he couldn't help a sense of approbation.
'If only' would destroy anyone, given a chance, and the Elonian's opinion of Slate Carter rose somewhat because the hunter had not given those two devastating words that chance.













