#edd doesn't exist

[nortsauce]

Gay people can never just say "I love you" its always gotta be some world-ending shit

[nortsauce]

In the RedactEDD au, Tord, in a fit of Panic trying to get a green-card to escape getting arrested promised to Fund Tom's film company if he agreed to marry him. y'know. For a green card.

The documents are shoddy but they are there. This bites them in the ass, however when Matt tries to get some information and has to try and get Edd and his own files from the DMV, but he lost his license, so they had to use Tom's.

Unfortunately, A co-worker of Tord's from the Red Army recognized him. Paul let them through but to avoid suspicion... they really had to SELL the whole "Married" act.

Cue hijinx 🫴

[nortsauce]

NORTSAUUUCE GIVE ME MORE INFO ON SHARMEL AND MY LIFE, IS YOURS!!!

i love you anons who indulge in my hyperfix, imagine i take you and roll you up into a ball and place you in my hat

So shamrael, aka "Sham" is an angel who was sent to help edd change his outlook on life. If he succeeded, he would get his wings! (Its literally "Its a wonderful life" but goofy)

In this one, Shamrael is a little more emotionless (atleast in appearance)

He struggles to understand human emotions and only does what he believes is right. This leads to a lot of misunderstandings and only brings up more questions. If anything, Sham is afraid of Matt.

Matt is literally bending reality and fate through sheer will power to get Edd back, and Sham doesn't know how to react to that.

It breaks them a little bit, not understanding something so deep and profound. Angels weren't meant to feel that. Thats an entirely human thing to do.

It only gets worse for sham bc Sham knows what happened to Edd and why it happened. But sham can't tell anyone because not even Sham understands it. Edd made a decision so emotional and reckless and Sham is confused.

Some guardian angel they are!!

What a sham.

Anyways some fun facts,

- Sham isn't afraid of demons he thinks they are cute

- Sham goes by he/they/it but it doesn't matter really

- Sham has his wings now. But he doesn't thing they did a good job so... why?

- Sham has the same eyes as Ringo

- He is afraid of Matt, confused by Edd, intrigued by tord, and well Tom's a demon so. You know.